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*emerges from the murky depths*

 

oh wow hey look it's been...nope not even contemplating how long it's been since i've been on here. 

 

one goal: check in and reflect. one sentence. 

 

also! for those who're wondering: i'm back at school! i'm about two weeks away from finishing my first semester and i'll (FINALLY) graduate in the spring. HURRAH!

 

more details to come? maybe? also if anyone is on discord lmk because that is my primary mode of communication these days :)

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other things: 

 

currently recovered from ED stuff, not eating particularly well but i'm trying and also the more i think about food the worse the ED thoughts get so i'm just...not. BUT, i did join the student run CSA's on campus and i have lots of produce so YAY. am i making flourless chocolate cake tonight? also yes. 

 

School is going really well. I'm enjoying all my classes though making friends has been a lot harder than i anticipated. but i have bean with me and also i sort of adopted my neighbor's cat because she was being neglected to the point of abuse and they left her outside when it was 34F and raining. 

 

Gotta work on my senior project over thanksgiving break. I'm looking at paratext (specifically footnotes) as a site of creativity in the novel through two lenses: as a reader through literary theory and then as a writer by writing my own story that emulates three texts (the third policeman, pale fire, and guards! guards!). my advisor is currently writing a novel that uses footnotes so it's a good fit. 

 

one of the more interesting things i've learned about recently is the history of AIDS activism in America and it's been really eye opening as far as what reaches public discourse and what doesn't. the readings are great and incredibly fascinating even in the professor doesn't manage our class discussion time that well, imo. the readings have made it worth it. 

 

also a thing i've learned: percy shelley was extra af. 

 

i have an entire senior house to myself. i was supposed to have two housemates and i did email them but never heard back. so i've concluded they're cryptids who catfished the university. i'm impressed tbh. 

 

i refuse to wear my warmest coats even though it's reached below freezing several times this month. mostly because if it gets even colder i have nowhere to escalate to. and that is a level of hopelessness i cannot abide. 

 

break started today so i'm taking the night off of homework because hahaha what is sleep and i am very tired. 

 

uh...i'll see/read around and say hi!

 

*mic drop* 

 

(HOW DO YOU END A POST?)

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9 minutes ago, LadyShello said:

Welcome back. It's nice to see you around again. Congrats on school working out.


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thank you! it's nice to be back!

 

(did i almost accidentally type tits instead of it's? also yes.)

 

school has been great and i had to argue with financial aid but i ended up with a huge amount of grant money so success is mine!

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thank you! it's nice to be back!
 
(did i almost accidentally type tits instead of it's? also yes.)
 
school has been great and i had to argue with financial aid but i ended up with a huge amount of grant money so success is mine!

Tits (almost) out in Spooky's thread.


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This is weird...! Just two days ago, I thought to myself, "where's Spooky? I hope she's doing OK." And now you're here :D Welcome back!!

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13 hours ago, LadyShello said:

Tits (almost) out in Spooky's thread.

Always a good time, here!!  :)

 

So glad to hear about school, the space, the funds! It sounds as though you're set up well. I know there are plenty of obstacles to navigate.

 

Keep posting!

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18 hours ago, DrFeelgood said:

Spooky!  So glad you're not a ghost. :D

HI!! I am very much corporeal and glad about it! :D

17 hours ago, deftona said:

Yay Spooky! Great to see you :D 

YAY DEF! Great to see you too! <4

13 hours ago, Terah said:

Spooky!!!!

Glad to have you back <4

And smut already.... I 'm impressed :D

Terah!!! i'm so glad to be back! i made my return with style smut ;)

8 hours ago, Ensi said:

This is weird...! Just two days ago, I thought to myself, "where's Spooky? I hope she's doing OK." And now you're here :D Welcome back!!

universal synchronicity! and here i am! summoned :D thank you, i'm so glad to be back! <4

8 hours ago, Heidi said:

Always a good time, here!!  :)

 

So glad to hear about school, the space, the funds! It sounds as though you're set up well. I know there are plenty of obstacles to navigate.

 

Keep posting!

:D

thanks! it's been really great to back, and i've been loving my classes. definitely some obstacles but i'm not overwhelmed to the point of being incapacitated, which was the goal of medical leave so success! 

 

i'll be around :) 

6 hours ago, Emma said:

Spooky!

Glad you're back.

thanks emma! 

5 hours ago, Korranation said:

WELCOME BACK SPOOKY!!!

thanks korra!

5 hours ago, JessOfAllTrades said:

Welcome back!

thanks jess!

 

i feel like i just got a big internet hug 

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I went to the grocery store today since all the meal options on campus are closed for the holiday. thankfully i have a full-sized kitchen with a fridge, freezer, oven, stove, and a microwave. and cooking skills. :)

 

i've been doing a little writing this evening. and i napped after shopping. i wasn't great with my sleep this past week (why did my professor make my essay due at 11am on a sunday WHY) so it was time well spent. I'll probably try to get to bed by midnight (sadly, this is early for me, insomnia has been a factor) and then have a solo thanksgiving tomorrow. well me + cats. who are great company. i mentioned i'd adopted my neighbor's cat and she's sitting in my lap right now :)

 

i bought a turkey breast which is about 3lbs so definitely fine for one person. and i'll have leftovers!

 

i'd like to make butternut squash gratin and roasted brussels sprouts. maybe mashed potatoes and sweet potatoes but i'm also trying to remember i'm one person HAHA. and i like leftovers but i also like variety. 

 

a pre-emptive happy holidays to everyone!

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oh just other whatever:

 

i've been using a bullet journal for school this semester. i really like it, but i'd like to make more of an effort to write out what i'm doing in a day even when i don't have classes. something about the structured "must do" of classes inspires me to think through the rest of my day. so i'll be trying to think through that in this challenge. 

 

one thing that's not so good: i've been really bad about prioritizing eating. i've gotten good at having a quick breakfast (generally yogurt with granola since it's super easy, sometimes cereal, or eggs if i have time) but lunch is...not great, and sometimes i don't end up eating dinner till 8+ hours after i have breakfast. i've been packing a little snack box in my backpack some days (cheese, crackers, dates, pumpkin seeds, sometimes a bit of fresh fruit) and i'm thinking of adding a savory one with veggie sticks, hummus, and hardboiled egg(s). but it's been an issue. when i got sick with a stomach thing earlier this semester they insisted on weighing me at the health center and it wasn't great. but i also know the more i think about that part the more likely a relapse is. so if i can try to think of food like...homework, or something that i need to do as just a task/to-do than maybe i'd be able to be more consistent. 

 

on that note: today's food was a mess. no breakfast, weird junk food snacking, and then hot chocolate. which i am currently drinking. i don't want to think about food all the time but i want to make better choices so the struggle is real. 

 

school things that need to happen over break:

  • Terrence malik film essay
  • pick up Paratexts from the library (probably can wait until after break)
  • romantic poetry response
  • revise short story, finish other short story
  • brainstorm queer times essay
  • reading
    • keats
    • queer times (four readings)
    • 3-d film
    • story workshop critiques

There's a short story prize and submissions are due december 4th. i have nothing to lose by submitting, and class portfolio's for my fiction class are due the 6th so...that's something i need to do tomorrow around cooking. 

 

yay school....ha ha...ha...

 

(it always looks like a lot listed out. this is what happens when you take four writing intensive classes)

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Phew! That's a lot of studies :D I hope you find the energy to enjoy them! I'm currently on two math courses, and I have a lot to learn. I try not to think about the amount of all the assignments too much, I just try to learn one thing at a time. Enjoy your Thanksgiving turkey! :D

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2 hours ago, Ensi said:

Phew! That's a lot of studies :D I hope you find the energy to enjoy them! I'm currently on two math courses, and I have a lot to learn. I try not to think about the amount of all the assignments too much, I just try to learn one thing at a time. Enjoy your Thanksgiving turkey! :D

it's a lot so small steps are key! i want to enjoy my thanksgiving but i also...feel the need to start some homework today -_- 

 

what kind of math courses are you taking?

 

thanks ensi! I hope you have a lovely day. 

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4 minutes ago, spooky said:

it's a lot so small steps are key! i want to enjoy my thanksgiving but i also...feel the need to start some homework today -_- 

 

what kind of math courses are you taking?

 

thanks ensi! I hope you have a lovely day. 

 

Just remember to book in some rest days. They're super important for ze mental health!

 

I'm taking trigonometry and probability classes. After finishing them, I will probably be able to tell if some shape is a triangle or not.

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