• Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

Hypotheticalfox

Get Off My Lawn: Things You’ve Done that Make You Feel Old

Recommended Posts

I have a favorite grocery store.

I get excited knowing I'm getting close to being able to pay off my auto loan.

I look at the sugar content and then the fiber content of every cereal box I browse in the grocery aisle.

"Good Lord" and "Goodness Gracious" are slowly becoming part of my vocabulary. The unsavory curse words are still there every now and then. 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Chaperoned a high-school music trip to Williamsburg/Busch Gardens a couple of weekends ago. Rode one roller coaster. Spent the rest of the 10 hours with my husband - walking slowly, sitting a lot to ease my aching joints, riding the tram that goes over the park, riding the train that goes around the park, drinking coffee at an outdoor spot, watching the show in Das Festhaus, then staying there until time to leave because it was SO FREAKING COLD.

 

I realized: I am my parents. I am my parents when I remember them doing the above things while we youngsters ran around like crazy and went on every insane ride.

 

Sigh.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

First time ever feeling old: at brothers house for a party, nephew ran up and stated "uncle adam, can you move the commercial, its in my way"...I was confused, asked brother what he meant, he wanted me to fast forward through the commercial cause they'd recorded the show on their box...I immediately said "boy when I was your......." and went to get a beer crying (was in late 20s)

 

Other sundry times: walking around grocery store realizing I'm humming the store music (every damn time)

 

Find a few gray hairs in in beard. 

 

Second and thirding all the others including: self imposed bed-times, hangovers not worth the drinking, starting to give a shit about my weight...and I have a cardiologist (still 34, which I KNOW isn't OLD, but damn)

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My younger son is graduating high school in a few weeks. He will be attending a college nearby, with my older son. (Yay, good public universities and ZERO college debt!)

 

I can't wait to get off the school email lists. I keep going to events and thinking: "Yay, last high school play ... last high school concert ... only one more parent assembly" and dreaming about what I will do when they finally both leave the house (2 years for older son, cross fingers). 

Mentally designing a "knitting room" in my older son's bedroom. Now THAT is old!

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yesterday, I couldn't find my phone. I asked someone to call it, hoping it would ring somewhere I could hear it. Turns out it was in the cargo pocket of my pants. Those involved IRL are now sworn to secrecy....

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I bought tickets for the early comedy show, not the late one.

 

I had to explain my "Glengarry, Glen Ross "Coffee is for closers" reference.

 

I had to write about tanning stickers and I did more research than I did when I write about laser therapy.

 

The list goes on.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

About 16 years ago I went on vacation with my in-laws.  I was late getting out, so I met everyone at the beach.  When I arrive there I saw a beautiful young lady in a black bikini, who turned around and said "Hi Uncle Mark!"  It was my wife's niece, who was 17 at the time.  Not only felt old, felt like a dirty old man.

 

I met a bartender (hence someone old enough to drink) once who didn't understand my Blazing Saddles reference.  The same bartender had no idea who Dom DeLouise was.

 

I was once asked if Paul McCartney was in a band before Wings, and if Julian Lennon's father was a musician too.

 

 

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
18 hours ago, Mark D said:

I was once asked if Paul McCartney was in a band before Wings, and if Julian Lennon's father was a musician too.

 

 WOW!?!?   That doesn't speak to our age, it speaks to the ignorance of the kids.....  oops... nope, it's our age... :(

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I quoted Tolkien to an 8th grade class and got one, and only one "pity chortle."  I was then asked (same day) to put on a YouTube video of the Harlem Shake and thought, "What is this drivel? ... When did I start using the word drivel?"

 

Bonus points if you can guess the Tolkien quote.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I had a 24yo man ask me if his plaid flannel shirt was "too grunge looking."  I said "Nah, you're not wearing Doc's.  You're fine."  I had to explain   what Doc's are.  I guess I really am 40+.    And I do have a favorite grocery store!

  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The highlight of my week last week was my husband getting a non-scary list of things to do from the dentist after not going for a decade. That was really the highlight. Because I hope the word "crown" never enters my house. (Now I should probably do something about the fact that I probably haven't been since 2006.)

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On ‎6‎/‎3‎/‎2018 at 9:47 PM, ilsudur said:

I quoted Tolkien to an 8th grade class and got one, and only one "pity chortle."  I was then asked (same day) to put on a YouTube video of the Harlem Shake and thought, "What is this drivel? ... When did I start using the word drivel?"

 

Bonus points if you can guess the Tolkien quote.

this makes me so sad

my guess:

you_shall_not_pass.jpg?maxWidth=500

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now