Tehya's Time to *LEARN HOW* to Twinkle

[Tehya]

Day 1

okay so here it is January 1st and I have started trying to better myself yet again.  OMG is this frustrating.  I have been trying to do really good today on watching what I eat and drink, but here it is 8:35pm and I am STARVING.  I have learned today - again - that I need to make sure that I am planning out what I need to eat on a daily basis. I keep looking around my room looking for something to eat.  Positive thing is that I really don't have anything in here to eat.  But at the same time that is just making me even hungrier.  UGH!  LOL   So even though I am still starving, I think today has been a good day.  I haven't had any pop/soda, I have recorded everything that I have eaten, and I am journalling about my day.  Well I haven't gotten into my day yet but I am going to because it is super easy.    Work today SUCKED!!!  You would figure that fast food would be slow on a holiday - which if we were staffed, it would have been, BUT there were only 3 people there today including myself over our lunch rush, which REALLY sucked!!!!  The person who was doing all of the drive thru and front counter stuff is a 17 year old kid who has some sort of mental thing going on because he is always doing the "potty dance" but never really has to go.  He is also a bit of a flake so it was basically just myself and the other person who was making food.

 

Goals for the rest of the night: 

1. Working on my resume - goal is to find a new job by the end of this year.
2. Work on finding exercises/workout plan I can follow here at home.

[Tehya]

Day 2

January 2nd - much better today.  I still didn't get a chance to eat all day so finally when I got off work, I was starving and didn't make the best food choices.  Time to let the cat out of the bag - I currently work at Taco Bell so dinner consisted of a Nacho Bell Grande and a Power Chicken bowl - both with extra meat.    I did do better with the amount of walking I did today.  I guess I was more tired than I thought also because I passed out while writing this last night.  Over all yesterday was a good day.  The whole no pop thing is getting easier and easier.  Doing the journalling is getting easier and easier.  Just needed to get money to make the eating healthy easier also.  I didn't get any of the goals I set for the previous night completed, which is honestly a little frustrating but I might be getting my sights a little high, so I am just going to be happy with what I have done.  Just wish I had some more encouragement/accountability to stick with everything because going at it alone is VERY hard but I am use to going at it alone so somehow I will manage.

[fireandlight]

Following  Keep it up - you're doing great so far.

[fireandlight]

How did January 3rd go?


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[Tehya]

Jan 3

 

WOW  I forgot to journal yesterday.   Ummmmm lets see. Work was a lot less stressful because we were fully staffed for a change over lunch.  Well mostly fully staffed. 

Still struggling with eating.  I am keeping track of what I am eating but I am still going over on the 1400 to 1900 calories that I have set for a daily goal.  I also am not meeting my goal of 10K steps but am consistently getting over 6k.  I still need to figure out a workout routine that I can do.

[Tehya]

Jan 4

 

Okay so now onto today.  I had a great brunch with my boyfriend at Perkins.  I tried to eat healthy - BUT it was very hard.  Most of my daily calories were consumed with that meal.  I still need to go get food so that I don't have to eat out all the time but I am consciously looking at the calories attached to each item I am thinking of eating.  Still short on my steps.  It was my day off so I should have made it so I am a bit frustrated.  This is not how I wanted to start this out.  Today was the first time since that start of the year for me to have any sort of bread and that was when I had my muffin this morning.  Okay so I want to try to make sure that I am covering all of my goals while writing this battle log so I am going to post those again and answer them.

 

How I am going to go about getting to where I want to be:

I have no clue at this point.

• Cut out carbs from my diet. I answered this above.
• Find a workout plan that fits in to what I have available and schedule I need to work on this.  I am struggling on where to look or how to start on this currently.
• Set an annoying notification for my fitness pal to remind me to log my food  I got a new phone today so I need to do this.
• Come on here and keep up on a battle log  Think I am doing okay with this currently.
• Find/buy a scale to weigh myself.  Buy a tape measure to track my measurements since I know that the scale lies.  Still haven't done this.  Either one of these things.

I think that pretty much sums up today. 

 

[fireandlight]

I don’t know how much past experience you have with a calorie restrictive diet, but those first few weeks are always the hardest while your body is adjusting to your new habits. Keep at it and don’t be too hard on yourself if you aren’t meeting your exact goals right away.

Do you know or have a sense of how many calories you used to eat before you started your new diet? It may be that going down to 1900 might be too steep of an adjustment.

As an alternative - when I was first starting out I used to ask for a to-go box right when they delivered my order - the. Immediately put half the order into it when it arrived. It removes the temptation to just keep eating and for most restaurants these days portion sizes are usually double what any one person really needs.

All in all, I’m happy to see you’re still at it!


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[Tehya]

You think you got the best of me
Think you had the last laugh
Bet you think that everything good is gone
Think you left me broken down
Think that I'd come running back
Baby you don't know me, 'cause you're dead wrong

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger
Stand a little taller
Doesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm alone
What doesn't kill you makes a fighter
Footsteps even lighter
Doesn't mean I'm over 'cause you're gone

 

I'm over that old person of me.  I'm over those old habits.  Time to be the strong woman everyone says I am.  Time to start believing in myself.

 

GOALS

LONG Term Goals

1) Lose 80 pounds.  That is going to bring me back down to my weight in high school and a weight I feel like I would look good at.  Currently I am about 245. (I will try to take pictures and post later)

 

2) To get out of apartment living and get a house.  I would love to try to accomplish this in the next 4 years, so by the time my youngest has graduated high school.

 

3) To start putting myself first.  Right now, everything I do is without thinking about how I would feel.  It is always about others.  I mean that's not entirely a bad thing but when it ultimately adds more stress to my life it really is.

 

SHORT Term Goals

1) By the end of 2018 I want to have started losing weight.  Goal is 10 pounds.  Yes I am going to attempt that even with the holidays coming up.  

 

2) Before I can attempt to get out of apartment living, I need to get in to one as I am currently couch hopping/homeless.  I have until the end of this month to have another spot to go.

 

3) I need to start learning how to say no.  I know where I am at currently financially and its not a good spot so instead of saying yes I will buy whatever for the soon to be ex-boyfriend, I need to just start saying that I can't afford it,

 

HOW TO ACCOMPLISH GOALS

LONG Term Goals

1) Tracking my food intake thru myfitnesspal, realizing that no matter what set backs I might face I need to figure out how to work through or around them, get my butt exercising - even with it becoming cold outside.

 

2) Pay off stuff on my credit report, send the money as I can afford it, use taxes to help with larger chunks.

 

3) Think of where I want myself in the future, look at bigger pictures

 

SHORT Term Goals

1) See above - I am just breaking my bigger goal down to make it more manageable

.

2) Work with the local different counties for assistance, search craigslist for something I can afford, consider renting a room instead of full apartment until I can get something.

 

3) Get the stuff out of my name that isn't mine - IE the motorcycle, 1 car and truck, determine if I really want to keep both hulu and netflixs, just do some serious thinking and stop doing so much stuff spur of the moment to make someone else happy.

[Tehya]

Progress on goals:

 

1) Even though I just restarted this today, I have to say for the most part today was successful.  I did a good job of eating healthy - well still involving the processed foods, but nothing fast food like.  So that's a win for me.

 

2) Unfortunately I did not call around to see if there was any help out there for me in terms of finding an apartment so I will need to do the research on who to call about that over the weekend.

 

3) ugh -- this is the hardest one for me.  If my boyfriend wants to stay with me than he needs to step it up with me.  I also need to figure out if I want to stay with him because of how sexist he is.  Well a lot more than that but those are two of the major things.

[Tehya]

Progress on Goals:

 

Today was really hard for me.  I have been fighting a headache - probably from having to much bread type products on Tuesday night - that I have been trying anything and everything to get rid of and nothing has.  With that going on, I really didn't feel like trying to figure out food, so the person I am staying with and I went out to a buffet. Not the smartest choice but I needed food. However it is also really hard to enter how much of items I actually ate.  I took my best guesses.

 

Since I was at work, I didn't get to any work on a place to live.  I also didn't figure out what I want to do about my boyfriend.  He never really wants to do anything that I want to.  If we do anything together, it literally has to be what he wants.  I am getting really tired of it.

[Jean]

Go for it, small victories, one at a time and not giving up the ground you've already covered, that's the way to go. Just keep trying to figure it all out and, eventually, you will do.

[Tehya]

I have determined that I am going to do the next challenge. I think I even have my goals.  Just not sure how good they are.

 

 

 

1) Walk 5 min MORE per day.  At the end of the 4 weeks I should be at 140 minutes, roughly.

2) Complete the NF Bodyweight work out 3X per week.

3) Put $5 in a jar every day/ $35 per week.  At the end of the week I should be at $140 saved.  

 

 

 

[Tehya]

Okay so I am also using this as kinda a journal place too.  But everything that I put here is actually helping me towards my goals.  I just told my ex boyfriend and his son to get on their own cell phone plans as I need to cut back on my bills.  Next step is to tell him that he needs to get the Chrysler out of my name.  And if he wants the bike he needs to figure out how to get a loan for that and get it out of my name also.  I am only going to keep paying for the couches and the truck, but then again I might just take the truck since he doesn't want it anymore.   Okay enough here, now time to figure out the apartment/living situation, shower, and go find food before going to work later.

[Tehya]

Okay so yesterday wasn't a good day on the logging of food front.  I didn't do it because I simply didn't feel like doing it to be honest.  Today isn't being much better

 

I am actually already struggling.  I am having a problem getting motivated to do any sort of working out.  I need to figure this out.  It hasn't really helped having a migraine the last 3 days.  Luckily it is finally starting to go away.  Maybe tomorrow before I go to work, I will get a 30 minute walk in around the complex where I am staying right now.  And maybe tomorrow night I will print up the body weight workout plan so that I can follow it easier than.

 

Just overall been a depressing couple of days lately.  I need to figure out how to get out of this funk too.  I got lots of work to do.

[Tehya]

WOW.... It has been 11 days since I posted last.  Well things aren't going so well for me.  Still haven't found a place to live, still haven't figured out what I want to do about the whole boyfriendish person in my life, still haven't gotten out walking, have even fallen off tracking what I eat.  I guess I am at a loss as to how to really do this.  Guess I need to do some searching to figure that out.  Anyone have any suggestions???  I could really use them and some encouraging words.