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I skipped the last challenge, but things have still been happening over here in my little corner -- wedding planning, family trip to Spain (holy drama llamas guys), work getting really busy, and the normal episodes of the sads.

 

Image result for sadness movie blue inside out gif

When we saw this movie fiance was like THAT'S YOU. Unfortunately true.

 

So the year is shaping up like this:

  • February bachelorette in San Diego
  • May 6 Flying Pig Half Marathon
  • June 3 Spartan Sprint Ohio
  • July 1 WEDDING!!!!!
  • September Honeymoon in Portugal

I'm such a lucky duck.

 

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Goal 1 - Dial in Nutrition (for real this time)

So...fiance and I are doing another Whole 30. It's going pretty smoothly, I'm not even having bad cravings (though fiance is...he's dreaming of pizza lol). My post-W30 is always the struggle. This year I have my bachelorette in San Diego right after, and I tend to enjoy non-paleo food and wine. But once I come home I will be shopping 

  1. Complete the Whole 30
  2. Enjoy my bachelorette party. Eat intentionally and consciously.
  3. Go back to mostly Whole 30 eating (~90%)

 

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Goal 2 - Training, duh

As a Christmas gift my mom signed me up for the Flying Pig half. Training starts this week, eek!

The goal components:

  1. Complete all half marathon training runs
  2. Yoga/barre/pilates 2x/week
  3. Complete the Nargles 9k

 

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Goal 3 - Be Happy

  1. Meditate every day (this is my 2018 resolution and I've been successful so far)
  2. Go to bed by 9:30
  3. Wake up at 5am - this is to facilitate either getting in early to get on top of my work, or having a quiet moment alone before heading into the office.

Last Saturday I watched a sad movie (Only the Brave), and I don't follow a lot of news so the tragic end hit me really hard. Over the next hours I went into a depressive tailspin that ended with me sobbing on the floor trying to explain to fiance that I was sad for no reason. This is on a day that I took an awesome barre class and then played tennis. Eating Whole 30, working out...it's frustrating to feel like I"m doing everything right and still get the doldrums. All I can do is work on the little things.

 

ETA: Rereading this it sounds really depressing but I wanted to note that these episodes are occasional. And after I cry I feel better. The Whole 30 is just sort of exposing this stuff because I can't stress or emotional eat, so I end up just kind of wallowing in it.

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Day 1

Goal 1 Nutrition - stayed on plan

Goal 2 Training - barre class

Goal 3 Daily Routine - Didn't get up until 5:40, went to bed late because I didn't make the goal til after the 'bedtime', haha. But I meditated so I'll count it.

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Spain was AMAZING. I loved the Sagrada Familia in Barcelona...the outside is impressive and cool just based on scale and complexity, but the inside was breathtaking. The different colors of light streaming in through the stained glass, the way the crazy-tall pillars make it feel sort of like a forest...completely jaw-dropping. I ate and drank all the things but don't really regret it - we had tons of jamon and wine and it was fabulous. We stopped in Madrid, Valencia, and Barcelona and they were all lovely. My dad had booked tours for us everywhere which was so fun and easy (they picked us up at our hotel).

Image result for sagrada familia

Not my picture but captures a little of the magic.

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Trip highlights. That picture is huge but I like it.

 

The drama was just...my sisters were sharing a room and they just can't do that for over a week without rubbing each other the wrong way. Middle sister tends to get weird and apparently rant-y when tipsy, and her tolerance is low. Plus my dad had too much to drink one night out and had a conflict with my youngest sister -- of course fiance and I had left by then so we missed the whole thing, but the next few days I'm going back and forth between sis and dad trying to figure out wtf actually happened and get them to make up for goodness sakes because little sis was opting out of all the activities/sightseeing and seriously girl you're in SPAIN so get over being upset and leave the hotel room. For the last night my dad finally got an extra room so they could sleep separately and that helped some. The main downside is that it was going to be a busy vacation anyways -- the staying up late talking to separate family members and trying to get them to reconcile meant I came home utterly drained.

 

But to end on a high note, I loved the vibe of the country, and the food and drink were reasonably priced and delicious. It made me even more excited for our September honeymoon in PORTUGAL! We booked the flights and a couple hotels a few months ago, but this past month I fleshed out the itinerary some and booked the rest of our lodging plus a few fancy tours. I'm trying to find the right balance between activity and free time, and between ease/comfort and adventure. Fiance is not the most adventurous international traveler (though he tasted pretty much everything in Spain, which was so great) and I think navigating a non-English speaking country is way more stressful for him. Thankfully a fair amount of people there speak English, and for everything else we'll have google translate and planning ahead and English tours.

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Duoro Valley. Can't wait!

 

The plan is to spend a day in the Algarve (south end) beaching it up, then drive up to Lisbon. From there we'll have a day trip to Sintra and explore Lisbon - 5 nights total. Then take a train up to Porto for a couple days, then head out to the Duoro Valley (wine country, yay!) for a few days of R&R and wining and dining. There will be plenty of bread and meat and cheese and wine (all fiance-friendly food groups) and seafood.

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Week 1 Day 2

Goal 1 Nutrition - stayed on W30 plan

Goal 2 Training - 3mi run HALF MARATHON HERE I COME JUST TEN MORE MILES...

Goal 3 Daily Routine - Woke up early! I didn't quiiiite make it to bed on time (more like 10pm). Did my sleep meditation

 

I'm having trouble with going to bed early (big surprise). My main issue is that the Olympics are on in the evening and I want to watch it so badly. I know for optimal sleep I have to have an hour or so of no-screens time before bed, which means I really can't watch more than half an hour. *sigh* I can watch the clips/highlights the next day but it isn't the same as seeing it live with the buildup and the excitement. Not sure what to do about this.

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Duoro Valley. Can't wait!

 

The plan is to spend a day in the Algarve (south end) beaching it up, then drive up to Lisbon. From there we'll have a day trip to Sintra and explore Lisbon - 5 nights total. Then take a train up to Porto for a couple days, then head out to the Duoro Valley (wine country, yay!) for a few days of R&R and wining and dining. There will be plenty of bread and meat and cheese and wine (all fiance-friendly food groups) and seafood.


Your honeymoon sounds incredible! I am so jealous - you'll have a great time :) and hopefully drama free! Lol

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I wear the blue blocking  glssses at night when I watch TV.That seems to help.

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B01G2E78R0/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o01_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

 

I think your crying actually seems very normal, especially if you get over it.  I think you've nailed it, that when you aren't emotionally or stress eating you have to deal with your emotions. I was really surprised at how often I stuffed my emotions, and just ate food to make myself feel better. 

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Elastigirl Endeavors, Experiments, , and Explains - Current Challenge: May 9 to June 12 - Nerd Fitness Rebellion

"If more of us valued food and cheer and song, above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world" J.R.R.Tolkien

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On 2/14/2018 at 8:54 AM, Fonzico said:

Your honeymoon sounds incredible! I am so jealous - you'll have a great time :) and hopefully drama free! Lol

 

Hah well fiance was my safe haven among the drama llamas - he's so chill...the perfect antidote to my anxious self.

 

On 2/14/2018 at 11:11 AM, Elastigirl said:

I wear the blue blocking  glssses at night when I watch TV.That seems to help.

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B01G2E78R0/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o01_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

 

I think your crying actually seems very normal, especially if you get over it.  I think you've nailed it, that when you aren't emotionally or stress eating you have to deal with your emotions. I was really surprised at how often I stuffed my emotions, and just ate food to make myself feel better. 

Hi Elastigirl! I totally have your thread up on my home laptop waiting for me to get all caught up :P Thanks for the suggestion on the glasses -- I'll have to look into that. For now I figure it's not like I'm going to stay up past midnight to get all the Olympic coverage anyways, so I'm convincing myself to go to bed -- I can watch highlights the next day.

 

And YES it's pretty crazy realizing that I actually don't get terrible food cravings (unlike fiance) - I don't actually miss the things I'm not eating very strongly or often. It's not having that option as a relief valve for my feelings or stress. There are many days during the W30 where I think "wow, if I wasn't on the W30 I would totally be having a glass (or bottle) of wine after work - I want a drink so badly". Working out helps of course but unfortunately even exercise plus good diet plus light box plus good sleep doesn't keep the doldrums away. Still brainstorming alternatives to eating my feelings (for the millionth time). Reading and hot tea are good for relaxing/calming, but not quite adequate for the "agggggh everything is terrible" stressful moments.

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Week 1 Day 3

Goal 1 Nutrition - stayed on W30

Goal 2 Training - ran 3 miles

Goal 3 Daily Routine - Yup

 

 

Week 1 Day 4

Goal 1 Nutrition - stayed on W30

Goal 2 Training - ran 3 miles

Goal 3 Daily Routine - Was in bed around 9:30, stayed up a bit longer but I'll count it.

 

I RAN THREE DAYS IN A ROW! This is per my half marathon training plan. But I'm still excited about it. Also because on Wednesday I ran in the morning, before work -- a feat previously considered an impossible fantasy. It made me feel positive and clear-headed and energetic...at least for the first few hours before I became mired in the work and returned to my natural anxious/tired/overwhelmed state. I'm not running fast (10:30-11 min miles), but I am rarely needing to walk, which is encouraging. Tomorrow (Saturday) I'm supposed to do 4 miles...haven't run farther than 3 in months. We'll see how that goes!

 

In other news I've been tallying my workouts to "earn" a massage (I have a gift card). I reached my goal of 20 workouts (don't even remember when I started, but I also probably forgot to tally some) so I can book a massage now, yay!

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Week 1 Day 5

Goal 1 Nutrition - stayed on W30

Goal 2 Training - Pilates (effectively active recovery)

Goal 3 Daily Routine - Up later because weekend.

 

Week 1 Day 6

Goal 1 Nutrition - stayed on W30

Goal 2 Training - circuit fitness class

Goal 3 Daily Routine - Up later because weekend.

 

Week 1 Day 7

Goal 1 Nutrition - stayed on W30

Goal 2 Training - ran 4 miles, yoga class

Goal 3 Daily Routine - Yep.

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WEEK 1 SUMMARY

Goal 1 Nutrition - 7/7

Still on the Whole 30. This is really the easy part.

Goal 2 Training - Check

Completed week 1 of half marathon training! Plus a barre class, pilates, yoga, and a circuit class. BOOM.

Goal 3 Routine (Sleep + Meditation) - 7/7

I'm giving myself leniency as I figure out what really works best for me as far as sleep routine. I'm okay with staying up a little later on weekends for quality time with fiance.

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Miscellaneous Week 1 Thoughts

I've been really wanted to check my weight but holding off until post-W30 (per the "rules"). Wednesday morning we'll see where we're at. In non-scale victories...today a coworker told me I was looking slimmer! Super exciting, and not inappropriate because we talk about nutrition and have done a few spin classes together. Also I put on the size 8 Lululemon pants that my mom bought me a while ago and I actually feel like they fit well enough to wear now! I'm soooo close to fitting into smaller jeans too.

 

Yesterday I did serious meal prep:

  • 2 racks baked ribs with W30 sauce
  • Instant pot chicken and potatoes (I will definitely make a variation of this for future meal prep - easy yummy lunches)
  • steamed green beans
  • sausage patties (still need to bake these)
  • broccoli with bacon (prepped yesterday, cooked today)
  • slow roasted sweet potatoes

This is going to feed me through Thursday, so I'm pretty much going to be eating W30 for two extra days. 

 

Today I purged some clothes, so I'll be doing a Goodwill run soon - yay for decluttering! I'm slowly working my way through the boxes of stuffff upstairs.

 

Things are humming along over there. Today I'm feeling a little worn down so I'm taking a real rest day. I want my energy levels to be high to get through a tough week at work, and my Tues-Wed-Thurs runs.

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Week 2 Day 1

Goal 1 Nutrition - stayed on W30

Goal 2 Training - rest day!

Goal 3 Daily Routine - Yep.

 

My morning routine is shaping up something like this:

  • Wake up at 5am alarm - put in contacts, brush teeth, wash face
  • putter around packing lunch and cooking breakfast
  • make/drink mug of hot water with lemon
  • read Bible and eat breakfast in front of SAD light
  • somewhere in there, get dressed
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On 2/12/2018 at 10:31 PM, Hiroro said:

I skipped the last challenge, but things have still been happening over here in my little corner -- wedding planning, family trip to Spain (holy drama llamas guys),

 

"holy drama llamas" made me laugh, even though it's not really funny. I'm glad you were mostly peripheral to the drama and were able to really enjoy Spain!



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You're doing such a great job with your running! And I think it's really cool that your mom got you the race entry as a gift.

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Nice job on week 1 and great way to prepare food so this week is a success too.

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17 hours ago, Xena said:

 

"holy drama llamas" made me laugh, even though it's not really funny. I'm glad you were mostly peripheral to the drama and were able to really enjoy Spain!

 

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You're doing such a great job with your running! And I think it's really cool that your mom got you the race entry as a gift.

HA love that pic. It is funnier in retrospect than it was when I was emotionally and physically exhausted (too much wine, not enough sleep). Just using the term drama llamas helps me to not take it too seriously/personally.

Yeah it's the upside of my mom being reeeeeally into fitness. If I have to put up with her asking when I'm going to lose weight and if I'm going to lose weight for the wedding, I may as well get the positive side of it too.

 

16 hours ago, Elastigirl said:

Nice job on week 1 and great way to prepare food so this week is a success too.

Thanks! Meal prep is essential.

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Misc Ramblings

Yesterday was the last day of the Whole 30! I am not as relieved to be done as fiance, it's more a feeling of accomplishment for reaching a mini-goal. He wants to have pizza for dinner tonight, haha. 

 

Soooo yesterday my back started to feel weird, like I strained it a bit. Unclear how it happened, but in any case I scheduled a massage for tomorrow night. It's a triple whammy - hopefully relieve my back pain, relax before my vacation (aka exit work mode), and reward for tallying up 20 workouts. I'm going to skip today's run and see how I feel tomorrow. Also because I'm still feeling worn out still despite resting Monday and getting a decent amount of sleep. I was dragging this morning. 

 

I'm flagellating about how I'm going to eat this weekend. I don't feel a ton of (advance) guilt about enjoying unhealthy foods because it's a special occasion, but it's a weekend-long special occasion...not just one meal. Will keep thinking about this. I love to enjoy different foods when I travel so have to balance this with not wanting to feel sick.

 

I weighed in this morning at 142lb, which is several pounds down from the beginning of the W30. I'm okay with not eating so strictly as long as I can keep that downward trend, even at a slower rate.This is the year I will get back to the 130's. It has been decided.

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YOU GUYS LOOK

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That is farther AND faster than I've run in MONTHS!!!!!

 

I kind of sort of couldn't believe it when I hit Finish and saw the summary pop up, as I'd been glancing at MapMyRun for mileage but not paying attention to time.

 

I started out planning to do 3 miles per my training plan, but the plan has me doing 5 miles this weekend and I was not feeling optimistic about that ("new" distance while traveling?). Half a mile or so in I was feeling pretty good...my mom had suggested doing the 5-miler mid-week but I had brushed it off because I was supposed to run Tues-Wed-Thurs and didn't want to add the physical stress of more distance to the three days of running in a row. Well, since I took a rest day yesterday thanks to my iffy back, but my back felt pretty good today...I went for it! 

 

This also satisfies my Nargle 9k (as I walked ~0.8miles home after I stopped running)! 

 

I'm seriously not positive how I ran sub-10 miles when I've been doing more like 10:30. For context, last weekend's 4 mile run was at a 10:48 pace. Possible factors:

  • I feasted on Chinese food today - free work lunch. I thought this might cause stomach issues but though I was sleepy and thirsty in the afternoon, stomach was fine. And my energy came back over the course of the afternoon. Possible that the extra salt actually helped me, if I haven't been getting enough due to minimal processed foods. Also being thirsty meant I drank lots of water. And I didn't get hungry around 4pm like I have been.
  • Rest day yesterday
  • Perfect temperature (mid 40's when I got home, overcast and breezy)

I just went through my MapMyRun history...I don't log all my runs but pretty much always log anything over a couple miles. This is farther than any of my 2017 runs. Woah.

I spent a long time recovering physically and mentally from my November 2016 marathon, even now the ankle occasionally twinges but I'm so happy to be running basically pain free!

 

 

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Week 2 Day 2

Goal 1 Nutrition - FINISHED W30

Goal 2 Training - Ran 3 miles

Goal 3 Daily Routine - Yep.

 

Week 2 Day 3

Goal 1 Nutrition - 1st day post-W30. Ate a blob of cream cheese dip with veggies at a gathering - passed on popcorn, pizza, and chips

Goal 2 Training - Rest day due to icky back

Goal 3 Daily Routine - Yep.

 

Week 2 Day 4

Goal 1 Nutrition - 2nd day post-W30. Ate delicious Chinese food for lunch. Will have more for dinner (but more veg less fried things).

Goal 2 Training - RAN 5 MILES!!!!!

Goal 3 Daily Routine - Yep.

 

Posting now even though I haven't gone to bed yet. I don't feel bad about the lunch because it's the 1x/month staff meeting. I plan and buy the lunch (on my corporate card), which means I make sure to get things that I want to eat. Once a month isn't going to kill my dietary bank, and it's freeeee. I took home a bunch of leftovers, most of which I will freeze since fiance and I are both going out of town tomorrow morning (me to SAN DIEGO for my bachelorette, him for a family camp thing).

 

I'm still feeling mildly anxious about figuring out how to eat post-W30. Talking to fiance last night he wants bagels and pasta - between the W30 and the flu and the stomach thing, he lost 14lb over the last month O_O so he is not interested in losing more weight, just fueling his running. Fair enough. I think I'll be fine with him eating those things - as long as he eats it up and I don't feel like I have to eat it to prevent food waste.

One thing I have in my favor is a sort of hand-wavey New Year's resolution I made - not to buy any alcohol this year. It's not a complete ban...I'm fine with having a drink out once in a while, so really it means don't bring it home. My irritation with how much restaurants mark up wine already keeps that from being a frequent occurrence. I have a handful of special-occasion bottles in the basement.  I will also have wine at my parents' as their wine fridge is always full thanks to their wine clubs. As long as I bring food to contribute to the meal it seems like a fair trade (seriously, my dad is all "we have so much wine, help us drink it"). Similar to less-healthy foods, I want wine/alcohol to be more for celebrating or enjoying with company rather than something I do because I've had a stressful day.

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Congrats on your AMAZING run PR! That's freaking awesome!

Also, lack of salt is no joke - totally possible when you cut out processed foods!

Post W30 eating is TOUGH. I have no advice, but I hope you find your balance!

And I think your ideas about alcohol consumption are solid. If you can stick to it as a social aspect, rather than a coping mechanism, I think that would be really healthy!

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On 2/21/2018 at 3:32 PM, Hiroro said:

Yeah it's the upside of my mom being reeeeeally into fitness. If I have to put up with her asking when I'm going to lose weight and if I'm going to lose weight for the wedding, I may as well get the positive side of it too.

 

I was wondering a little how you felt about it. I know from your posts that your mom can put pressure on you. I wasn't entirely sure if it felt like a gift or felt like her imposing something on you. You're doing so great with the running though, that I think you can just enjoy it!

 

On 2/22/2018 at 6:11 PM, Hiroro said:

YOU GUYS LOOK

image.png.740a5fa511c1bf10168828d8c4b7884d.png

That is farther AND faster than I've run in MONTHS!!!!!

 

I kind of sort of couldn't believe it when I hit Finish and saw the summary pop up, as I'd been glancing at MapMyRun for mileage but not paying attention to time.

 

I started out planning to do 3 miles per my training plan, but the plan has me doing 5 miles this weekend and I was not feeling optimistic about that ("new" distance while traveling?). Half a mile or so in I was feeling pretty good...my mom had suggested doing the 5-miler mid-week but I had brushed it off because I was supposed to run Tues-Wed-Thurs and didn't want to add the physical stress of more distance to the three days of running in a row. Well, since I took a rest day yesterday thanks to my iffy back, but my back felt pretty good today...I went for it! 

 

This also satisfies my Nargle 9k (as I walked ~0.8miles home after I stopped running)!

 

How fantastic!! Some days are just magic like that. Were you running alone? Sometimes running with people makes a difference, but I think you just did this on your own. In that case I would chalk it up to magic or good karma :-)

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January 2017  December 2016

Oct/Nov 2016

 

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Congrats on finishing the Whole 30 and a great run too!

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Elastigirl Endeavors, Experiments, , and Explains - Current Challenge: May 9 to June 12 - Nerd Fitness Rebellion

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So I totally dropped off the face of the NF Rebellion earth...but for once it was not a tailspin onto the couch and poor eating decisions. This time was different guys.

 

I did eat/drink all of the things in San Diego, but since returning I've gotten back on track and am eating...in a balanced way. Shocking. And I've been running and doing lots of yoga. I did have two weeks where I only got in two runs (the weeks overlapped by the trip), but I did all my long runs. Today I ran 7 miles!!! And my short (3-4mi) runs have continued to be sub-10min mile pace. Today I felt kind of blech (probably thanks to Chick-fil-a for lunch, and having to work the weekend) but got out there anyways thanks to fiance's encouragement. Before my run I was procrastinating, trying to think of a food or drink to bribe myself with - nothing occurred to me. And post-run I craved SALAD (which is so so weird) and ate a healthy dinner. 

 

My weight is still not sub-140lb, but I actually feel like I'm seeing more of a change in the shape of my body this time around. So I may not be losing as fast but my stomach is flatter, my upper arms are slimmer, and I'm sooooo close to fitting into smaller jeans. I've also had two coworkers notice my weight loss and that felt pretty good.

 

Weeks, Days...

Goal 1 Nutrition - Finding a good balance, at least for now. Rarely drinking, focusing on protein and veggies.

Goal 2 Training - Owning it. This week I ran Tues (3mi), Wed (4mi), Thurs (3mi), and Saturday (7mi). Plus yoga on 

Goal 3 Daily Routine - Got off track here during/after the trip, still finding my way back.

 

The reason I haven't been around is because after San Diego I was just exhausted. It was wonderful seeing everyone, but the introvert in me was getting cranky. Plus my middle sister (who lives there) had opted out of some of the weekend, and I was upset about that. I'm simplifying...but I'll just say the little things she said and did built up, casting a black cloud over an otherwise awesome weekend. We exchanged a few emails after as I expressed my feelings (in a neutral tone, controlling the temptation to be snarky) and she basically put the blame on me (you don't understand or listen to me, I decided to go to Iceland the week before with my boyfriend of two months even though I don't have a lot of free time and energy because he cares about me...). My first instinct was to accept the blame, but stepping back I'm recognizing her narcissistic, manipulative tendencies. Not so much judging (because I don't think she is consciously trying to make me feel bad) as recognizing that she inherently has very low empathy and acts/speaks out of her own low self-esteem. I'm doing some reading on sibling relationships, narcissists, and communication to try to figure out how to approach her compassionately for best chances of a better relationship. I have some concerns about her being able to be positive and supportive at the wedding (as a bridesmaid), but I'm going to be surrounded by other people who love me and are excited for me. I have preemptively decided that if when we're all getting ready together she makes sideways/negative comments about my appearance, I'm going to kick her out of the room. But other than that time, there will be so many other people around that I know it'll be a blur.

 

I finally feel like I'm adjusted back to my time zone, and now it's Daylight Savings Time. But pretty much all good things are happening over here in my corner of the world. I'm still kind of in shock that my short run pace has improved without me doing any kind of interval or speed training. Today during the 7-miler I had a few moments (was listening to podcasts) where it occurred to me that I felt fine. It really is so wonderful, after years of off and on running with pain (shin splints, plantar fascitis, plantar warts, ankle injury). 

 

Thursday night I went to an event with Neil Gaiman (incredible author) and was just blown away by his wittiness and passion for his art. It got me started thinking about doing a little creative writing of my own, just for fun. I'm also working on wedding and honeymoon planning - I discovered that one of the Porto, Portugal specialties is a multi-meat sandwich covered in melted cheese with a tomato-beer sauce. Fiance is very excited. 

 

So overall I am meeting my goals, despite my lackluster attendance here. And I'm feeling happy.

Image result for happy sad inside out

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What an awesome report. Glad you enjoyed your trip, and congrats on coming home and picking right back up with your good habits.And yay that your hard work is showing, and people are noticing your weight loss. And another woot for learning some coping skills with your sister. I love Neil  Gaiman. I learned about him on these boards, and have really enjoyed the books I read by him (Norse Mythology and The Graveyard Book)

Wisdom 20   Dexterity 11   Charisma 12   Strength 16  Constitution-12

Elastigirl Endeavors, Experiments, , and Explains - Current Challenge: May 9 to June 12 - Nerd Fitness Rebellion

"If more of us valued food and cheer and song, above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world" J.R.R.Tolkien

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