I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired

[Fluffy_Shark]

Hello all, my name is Fluffy_Shark (or Fluffy for short) and this is probably my third time respawning. I am 22 years old. I struggle with depression and anxiety and currently go to school full-time while working part-time. Lately my stress has been through the roof and I've resorted to eating copious amounts of sugar, and drowning myself in the internet, all trying to escape from my stressful world. I have never liked how I look and I have always felt weak and unfit. I haven't worked out in nearly 4 months and I'm sick and tired of it. I have so many things I want to accomplish in life but I barely have the energy to get through the day. Even keeping my home clean, and general adulting tasks seem nearly impossible to complete some days. I am also extremely socially awkward, sometimes even hanging around my friends is tough. I am a negative person and get upset or jealous when others are happy around me, I really dislike this part about myself. I do this because I don't feel like I'm ever enough, I never feel like I'm doing enough.

 

Despite everything going on in my life, I desperately want to incorporate fitness back into my routine. I was happier and had more confidence when i was doing that. I also want to make a more consistent effort to focus on my mental health. I know I need to get a counsellor and I will be booking an appointment with my school's councillor. Outside of that however I want to start reading Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy again. I also want to practice my art skills everyday to get into a competitive design program. 

 

So my goals right now are as follows: 

Physical Health: Complete 2 NF workouts a week for a month  

                              Eat 1 serving of veggies a day for a month

                              Limit myself to 1 sugary treat a day (I currently eat 1-5 so this is a challenge for me)

Mental Health: Read Feeling Good for 10 min-1 hour a day

Art Skills: Practice drawing for 10 min-1 hour a day 

 

My actions to make it happen: 

Physical Health 

Workouts: write workout in bullet journal schedule for that specific day 1 week in advance,  pack gym bag with needed materials and put it on my bed (so I will see it and think twice before just mindlessly reclining on my bed). Progress will be tracked on here, bullet journal, and StickK (There will be a $10 penalty for every workout missed OR rescheduled)

 

Food: Write a veggie to eat that day in bullet journal schedule, make sure I buy lots of veggies on my shopping trips

 

Treats: Keep track of treats consumed in bullet journal and here, for every extra treat, there will be a $2 penalty, always have some kind of healthy snack with me like trail mix

 

Mental Health

Place book on bed and track progress on here and in bullet journal

 

Art Skills 

I have already informed my friend to keep me accountable of this but i will also record my progress in my bullet journal, StickK, and here ($5 penalty on every day missed), Placing sketchbook and medium to use that day on bed

 

Hopefully this new system works. I tried to change too much all at once initially but I think this is manageable. My physical health, my mental health, and my art skills are my biggest priorites right now aside from work and school. 

 

Wish me luck!

[Lee Jun-fan]

@Fluffy_Shark  nice work on not giving up. Third time respawning.  Sometimes it takes a few goes to get going at something. 

 

I noticed you have a few penalties on your plan.  Have you thought about possible rewards instead of penalties.  Not sure what motivates you more but sometime negative penalties can have negative results on your adherance. Where as positive ones encourage.  

 

Definately work on the sugar cut back.  That was the big factor for me.  It has taken about a month or more of not having Dares for me to finally be able to walk passed the milk section without grabbing one.

There are multiple studies and consitent links between good eating and exercise in reducing mental health issues. Certainly it won't clear it up instantly or remove it permanently but it may give you that edge and energy to fight it.

 

Keep at it.

[Fluffy_Shark]

@TruebornJester Thank you so much for the encouragement! 

 

Hm, to be honest I completely forgot about giving myself rewards... I am always very hard on myself and looking at it now, I think it would be great to include some loot to win  

I think I'll keep the penalties for now but we'll see if that helps or not, I'm still trying to figure out a good way to get myself to do things. 

 

Yeah, I know I need to slay the sugar beast hardcore. 

 

I noticed a big difference in my mental fortitude when I was exercising, I really want to get that back again. 

 

Thanks again!