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Chris-Tien, I'm gonna have to ask you to exit the donut.


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I've always both identified with and cringed at Robert Downey Junior's portrayal of Iron Man.  The guy obviously has issues with his parents, foods, and alcohol ... issues that he hasn't dealt with because he generally doesn't need to do so most of the time -- but that come back to bite him in the ass repeatedly during the Iron Man and Avengers series.   

 

 

 

I can relate.  For years, I was able to ignore the poor food choice messages and habits I'd gotten from my family of origin, but I recently realized that the past has been dragging me down slowly and inexorably for the past 15 years.  I've gone from thinking I'm really in charge of my life and on top of the world...

 

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... to realizing that I need to dial up some major changes and address issues directly before I can make real progress. 

 

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In my life, the missile has the name of my family of origin on it too.  So, this challenge, I'm following the lead of Tony Stark and making some major direction changes in how I approach fitness.

 

First off - I'm going to really focus on changing my eating habits from the ground up.  I've been putting bandaids on with minor tweaks.  Time to rip off the bandaids and dig into why and when I over eat.  I'm going to read Intuitive Eating by Evelyn Tribole M.S. R.D. and dig into why I eat the way I do .... and make changes.  But these changes will be different.  No restrictions on what, how much, or when I eat.  Just paying attention to the hunger signals .... and the ton of "messages" that play in my head from my parents and society about food.  I'll try to approach this with the famous Iron Man sense of humor.

 

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Second, I'm going to keep an anti-log log about what, when, and why I eat.  And how I feel.  And what I think about food choices.  Yea, I know, logging when I'm doing intuitive eating is kinda breaking the rules.  But that's so very like Stark .... 

 

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And for something really different, I will spend a challenge NOT RUNNING.  Seriously, can you imagine Tony Stark running??? 

 

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In truth, after I get done with the Zombies, Run! virtual race, I need to take a break.  Plantar fasciitis is flaring up, and I'm in a mental place where I'm not enjoying running, especially on a treadmill.  It's been a long, wet, icy winter, and I'm just ready to do other things, like biking or PiYo or whatever looks fun.  6 days per week.  

 

And then, don't faint, I'm increasing strength training to 4 times per week.  I've got my kettlebells in the basement and a workout plan for them.  And if I want to go to the YMCA, I have two different workouts I can do there.  The idea is that I can increase muscle mass while I unscrew my head.  If I'm eating a bit more, it has a purpose in a dirty gain.

  

Finally, it is time to SUIT UP!!  

 

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I've been drifting, work-wise, for a few years, and my wardrobe is ...... patchy.  I have come up with a list of items to fill in gaps so that I am professorial on the days that I am in the classroom (MWF) and business casual (jeans) during office  days.  

 

And .... I'm only sorta keeping score this time.  I have a checklist just because it is a way to remember what I planned to do for self-care.  But if I am still typing and logging as of the last day of the challenge, I get a new tech toy.

 

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Sorry, Pepper.  I will get an  Aria 2 scale - mostly because I do want to record progress but I am terrible about remembering to log the numbers before I've had my first two cups of coffee.  

 

For week 0 Objectives: purchase Intuitive Eating & prepare new affirmations.  I requested the book from the library, in the spirit of not buying more things that I need to store or move, but it looks like it is popular and will probably not arrive.  So, I'm a gonna order one this week.  

 

 

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Some sort of Jedi .....

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"No, I'm from Iowa.  I only work in outer space." -- James T. Kirk

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3 hours ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

Following along for not running. I can do not running for the rest of my life if I have to.

 

I actually do like to run and will probably pick it back up again after the challenge.  But body is telling me I need a break, and mind is in agreement. 

 

I miss running in Duluth where the Lakewalk (6+ miles along Lake Superior) is usually plowed and clear year-round.  With some exceptions on really awful days ......

 

 

Today's Anti-Log Log

 

As I ran errands at lunch time, I realized that I wanted a cheeseburger.  With ketchup.  This is probably directly due to the theme of this challenge since Stark has a cheeseburger (actually, two) after escaping captivity in Iron Man.  So, I stopped at the local burger joint where they have the best burgers in town.  Seriously.  

 

The challenge started when I opened my wallet and realized that I didn't have the $10 that I thought I still had.  (So, where did I spend $8??? Hum...) Which meant that I'd be paying with the debit card ... and that's usually the slippery slope to overeating because I hate to use plastic for just a burger.  Ugh!!  So, I ordered fries too.  I know - it makes no sense, but that's where the mind goes sometimes.  :shame:  But ... I knew that I didn't want the value meal deal.  I wasn't that hungry!!!  And I had to explain that several times to the incredulous counter person who kept telling me that it would cost LESS to order the cheeseburger with LARGE fries and a LARGE drink - that I didn't want at all!  

 

So ... I got the burger.  And a small fries.  That was satisfying and held me until dinner without a snack ..... or filching "tastes" while I cooked dinner.  I actually wasn't all that hungry at dinner time, but I was at the stage where Minnesotans will say "I could eat ..." if they are invited in for coffee and offered a little something to go along with that during the visit.  I stuck to eating a small portion of rice and curry with chutney, ate it slowly, and felt just fine.

 

Now, I'm sitting down to actually watch Iron Man and try to stick to just water.  I've realized, especially while watching BBC shows, that I am pretty susceptible to suggestion when I see characters taking food and drink on screen.  

 

 

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Some sort of Jedi .....

We are better than we know, if we can be made to see it, [then] for the rest of our lives, we'll be unwilling to settle for less.  

Walk to Mordor Spreadsheet

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"No, I'm from Iowa.  I only work in outer space." -- James T. Kirk

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1 minute ago, Chris-Tien Jinn said:

I've realized, especially while watching BBC shows, that I am pretty susceptible to suggestion when I see characters taking food and drink on screen.  

I used to be like that all the time, and it wasn't limited to BBC shows. Reading LOTR would often make me hungry. Sometimes when I was a kid just commercials could make me want something to eat.

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9 hours ago, Chris-Tien Jinn said:

I've been drifting, work-wise, for a few years, and my wardrobe is ...... patchy.  I have come up with a list of items to fill in gaps so that I am professorial on the days that I am in the classroom (MWF) and business casual (jeans) during office  days.  

Here for the potential shopping

 

1 hour ago, Chris-Tien Jinn said:

I actually do like to run and will probably pick it back up again after the challenge.  But body is telling me I need a break, and mind is in agreement. 

 

I miss running in Duluth where the Lakewalk (6+ miles along Lake Superior) is usually plowed and clear year-round.  With some exceptions on really awful days .....

 

And to support a runner who is smartly not running at the moment.

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12 hours ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

I used to be like that all the time, and it wasn't limited to BBC shows. Reading LOTR would often make me hungry. Sometimes when I was a kid just commercials could make me want something to eat.

 

Any particular strategy that you used to avoid getting sucked down the rabbit hole of unconscious, mirror eating?  

 

I only had time to watch 1/2 of the movie last night ... thankfully, I did not rush out to buy pizza or drink a green smoothie, although I realized when I woke up this morning that I'd been dreaming that I was drinking at a party.  My subconscious has all the fun!

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Some sort of Jedi .....

We are better than we know, if we can be made to see it, [then] for the rest of our lives, we'll be unwilling to settle for less.  

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"No, I'm from Iowa.  I only work in outer space." -- James T. Kirk

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34 minutes ago, Chris-Tien Jinn said:

 

Any particular strategy that you used to avoid getting sucked down the rabbit hole of unconscious, mirror eating?  

 

I read this book, called Intuitive Eating...

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I had some fun with the site that @SkyGirl used, and I have a start at making Christiana's avatar:

 

Viking-Woman2.jpg.fdff87a20c65fb148b8ecf175156ee89.jpg

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Some sort of Jedi .....

We are better than we know, if we can be made to see it, [then] for the rest of our lives, we'll be unwilling to settle for less.  

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"No, I'm from Iowa.  I only work in outer space." -- James T. Kirk

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April 17 - Anti-Log Log

Hubby and I have coffee together in the morning, and one of the points of conversation is - almost always - "what's for supper?"  Today, I realized that, after 45 years, I am just tired of being responsible for deciding what the family is going to eat.  I know that it is good for the family to eat together --- even if it is just the two of us now --- and we should cook food at home rather than eat (salty, fatty, additive-laden, over-portioned) take-out foods.  But I'm tired of the effort it takes to plan and prepare dinner: anticipating what everyone will want to eat, juggling "healthy" food choices vs. tasty ones, and figuring out how to manage time.  

 

Reading back over those thoughts, I notice the word "should"  and an evaluation of what is "good for the family" .... I have to question whether or not I value eating home cooked meals together.  This will become a moot point in August.

 

Food and Feelings

Breakfast: I had eggs and bacon, as usual.  The eggs tasted a bit like dish soap; so I suspect that hubby didn't rinse off the pan when he washed it.  I shouldn't complain, but this has happened a few times now. 

 

After taking a walk this morning, I was hungry for a snack. So I finished off a chocolate Soylent shake and had an orange.  And then suddenly didn't feel good and had diarrhea.  Is it soy?  Is it chocolate (God forbid!!)?  Is it just that I can't tolerate Soylent? Or was it a delayed reaction to the dish soap residue?  

 

I put off lunch because I had a massage at 1 pm and wasn't hungry at "lunch time".  After the massage, my stomach was growling big time; so I had a tofu burrito with chutney (it sounded good in theory ... not as good as guac would have been in retrospect) and an orange because I forgot that I'd already had an orange today.  Felt fine.  I suspect that my son-in-law is going to get the rest of the carton of Soylent.

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Some sort of Jedi .....

We are better than we know, if we can be made to see it, [then] for the rest of our lives, we'll be unwilling to settle for less.  

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"No, I'm from Iowa.  I only work in outer space." -- James T. Kirk

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The Intuitive Eating book arrived today!!  I'm trying to pace myself, realizing that I will read and re-read it several times, but I still need to process what I've read.  So many passages resonate .... but this one nailed how I've started to feel about food:

 

Quote

You are weary of dieting and yet terrified of eating.

 

Yeap.  That pretty much sums it up.  

 

Next will be Chapter 2 and figuring out which categories of eater fit me best.  

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Some sort of Jedi .....

We are better than we know, if we can be made to see it, [then] for the rest of our lives, we'll be unwilling to settle for less.  

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"No, I'm from Iowa.  I only work in outer space." -- James T. Kirk

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Out of curiosity, @Tanktimus the Encourager, @annyshay, and @Starpuck, do any of you, oh intuitive eaters, have children?  

 

My parents had their issues, and I will be slaying a wide range of ghosts while on this journey to relearn to listen to my body, and I tried really really hard not to be the cause of eating issues in my daughter.  But ..... I'm already beginning to wonder what unhelpful messages I gave her while trying to coach and model "healthy eating" habits.  Have any of you had to deal with looking in the rearview mirror at your parenting history??  Or how do you cope with current family members??

Some sort of Jedi .....

We are better than we know, if we can be made to see it, [then] for the rest of our lives, we'll be unwilling to settle for less.  

Walk to Mordor Spreadsheet

Past Challenges: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35. 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43

"No, I'm from Iowa.  I only work in outer space." -- James T. Kirk

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52 minutes ago, Chris-Tien Jinn said:

Out of curiosity, @Tanktimus the Encourager, @annyshay, and @Starpuck, do any of you, oh intuitive eaters, have children?  

 

My parents had their issues, and I will be slaying a wide range of ghosts while on this journey to relearn to listen to my body, and I tried really really hard not to be the cause of eating issues in my daughter.  But ..... I'm already beginning to wonder what unhelpful messages I gave her while trying to coach and model "healthy eating" habits.  Have any of you had to deal with looking in the rearview mirror at your parenting history??  Or how do you cope with current family members??

No kids... but my cat does tend to gulp his food when he's angry. ;) There's a chapter on parenting around food towards the end of the book as I recall. It was interesting to me even without kids.

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Love as thou wilt.

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1 hour ago, annyshay said:

but my cat does tend to gulp his food when he's angry.

 

:lol:

 

Actually, ours also seems to gulp foods at certain times .... and then throw up. Oy!!

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Some sort of Jedi .....

We are better than we know, if we can be made to see it, [then] for the rest of our lives, we'll be unwilling to settle for less.  

Walk to Mordor Spreadsheet

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"No, I'm from Iowa.  I only work in outer space." -- James T. Kirk

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On 4/17/2018 at 9:14 PM, Chris-Tien Jinn said:

I had some fun with the site that @SkyGirl used, and I have a start at making Christiana's avatar

 

I love it!!! How fun!  :D  Be careful though - that site is addictive!!

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Aye no kids here, and looking back, my childhood food habits were very much unrestricted yet I did pretty well.  We did have to clean our plates, but the plates were modestly filled.   The biggest thing, now that you've made me look at it... I didn't use food for anything other than to fill a hunger.   In fact, it often got in the way of things I had more fun with, or enjoyed more, and gave me more satisfaction.  Playing and what not ... hmm.  Something to consider looking forward!  Thanks for helping me peel that layer back!

 

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Chapter 2 of Intuitive Eating - "I am Iron Man" 

 

i-am-iron-man.jpg

 

Well, Chapter 2 of this (wonderful) book is about identifying whether or not you're an intuitive eater.  As if any intuitive eater would even be picking up such a book ....   And, no surprise, I'm not currently an intuitive eater.  

 

I have certainly been an intuitive eater, even as an adult.  And those have been some of my healthiest, stress-free, and normal-weight segments of my life.  And they have lasted as long as 15 years at a stretch.  So, I know that this approach will work, if I can learn to trust myself again.  And not lose touch with my inner wisdom when lifestyle and work changes come at me.  Getting busy and living alone again have the potential to shove me back into emotional eating and/or unconscious eating.  

 

I'm going to need strategies that make me stop and listen to myself, discern hunger and needs, and eat without distractions.  This will be a change from picking up a diet or making a long list of things I cannot eat (or times when I cannot eat).  'Cuz that is usually what I (and all of the women in my family) usually do.  The cult diet of choice with our family has usually been Weight Watchers - and I have to say that WW has worked for me up to a point.  I did lose 17 pounds and reduced body fat by 2% .... and have been maintaining that level for a couple of years now.  The problem is that I stopped losing weight with WW and got immediate reaction from fellow members and the meeting organizer that I must be underreporting what I eat, when I know I was measuring, tracking, and working out diligently .... and seemed always hungry anyway.  (Blaming the dieter rather than the diet for failure is noted as a problem in Intuitive Eating - it's been refreshing to read the first two chapters and get absolved for failure to lose weight by methods that are doomed to fail anyway.)

 

This has been such an eye-opening book so far that I am going to read chapter 3 and then slow down and work through the book gradually.  But I think I need Chapter 3 TODAY!!!  

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Some sort of Jedi .....

We are better than we know, if we can be made to see it, [then] for the rest of our lives, we'll be unwilling to settle for less.  

Walk to Mordor Spreadsheet

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"No, I'm from Iowa.  I only work in outer space." -- James T. Kirk

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Lake Supererior has huge waves! It looks like an ocean.My vote is the Soylent for your tummy issues. Though, I'd probably give my pans an extra rinse before I used them, even if it isn't making you sick, eggs and dish detergent= bleck. 

 

'Do you sometimes find your self reading self help books like Intuitive Reading, and then questioning all your past parenting, and seeing all the mistakes you made? Or maybe that's just my neurosis.:lol: Seems to me that feeding your family can be really nice, but also stress-filled. Make sure it's healthy. But also really tasty. Make sure your kids eat veggies. But don't force them to eat, or it will cause food issues.;)

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"If more of us valued food and cheer and song, above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world" J.R.R.Tolkien

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1 hour ago, Elastigirl said:

'Do you sometimes find your self reading self help books like Intuitive Reading, and then questioning all your past parenting, and seeing all the mistakes you made? Or maybe that's just my neurosis.:lol: Seems to me that feeding your family can be really nice, but also stress-filled. Make sure it's healthy. But also really tasty. Make sure your kids eat veggies. But don't force them to eat, or it will cause food issues.;)

 

Oh yea.  I have to remind myself that there were a lot of other influences in her life that shaped her current eating patterns .... day care/pre-school and the school lunch rush, plus all of the afterschool and weekend activities and the chaotic eating that those can involve.  Thinking back on childhood in the USA, it would be a miracle if we managed to remain intuitive eaters after age 5!   My daughter's eating seems, to me, to be to be disordered currently --- which invites that fruitless, anxious parental retrospection and asking things like ... should I have let my daughter eat ice cream for supper for weeks on end???

 

I should have picked Ghostbusters or Constantine as the theme for this challenge.  I'm going to be confronting a lot of past issues.  And me without a proton pack to my name .....

 

ghostbusters.jpg

 

 

 

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Some sort of Jedi .....

We are better than we know, if we can be made to see it, [then] for the rest of our lives, we'll be unwilling to settle for less.  

Walk to Mordor Spreadsheet

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"No, I'm from Iowa.  I only work in outer space." -- James T. Kirk

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I think it is even harder with girls than boys, since girls have so much pressure from society to be thin. Also, I think we tend to like sweet food more than  veggies, so I'm pretty sure that if we just let kids eat ice cream all the time, they would.:lol:

 

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Wisdom 22.5   Dexterity 13   Charisma 15   Strength 21  Constitution-13

Elastigirl:Luck Favors The Prepared - Current Challenge: August 1 to September 4 - Nerd Fitness Rebellion

"If more of us valued food and cheer and song, above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world" J.R.R.Tolkien

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48 minutes ago, annyshay said:

Uh, you don't need a proton pack when your suit is FULL OF WEAPONS you designed...

 

You know, I didn't believe in ghosts when I designed the suit .... heading back to the lab ......

 

images?q=tbn:ANd9GcScKx8-A4v_dkU4O1BfrjW

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Some sort of Jedi .....

We are better than we know, if we can be made to see it, [then] for the rest of our lives, we'll be unwilling to settle for less.  

Walk to Mordor Spreadsheet

Past Challenges: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35. 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43

"No, I'm from Iowa.  I only work in outer space." -- James T. Kirk

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