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Lady of the Bog: Sweats Like an Orc, Lives like a Hobbit, and (hopes to) Look like an Elf


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oh, also, cardio day yesterday. forgot to add above!

Daily Battle Log, Sweat like an Orc, Live like a Hobbit, and Look like an Elf

“As the Wheel of Time turns, places wear many names. Men wear many names, many faces. Different faces, but always the same man. Yet no one knows the Great Pattern the Wheel weaves, or even the Pattern of an Age. We can only watch, and study, and hope.”  Robert Jordan, The Eye of the World

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Few days lost to the ether

Day 70: Shellfish Selfish

Snooze time: I went to bed at 830 PM. Yes, 830 PM and then tossed and proceeded to wake through the night tossing and turning. I think it's time to recognize that I'm having sleeping problems. Don't really know where to start with my sleep hygiene. I think it's a mind problem which is unfortunately more complicated

 

Water/Supplements: f***

Meals:

700 am: oatmeal (i'm a creature of habit these days/ my pan isn't well seasoned so my eggs stick and I'm avoiding fixing the problem)

12 am: sad tofu sandwich 

kashi cereal + rice milk

530 pm: vegetarian chili w/ cornbread

Fitness: tempo, full body; felt good. felt good to work up a sweat. have been weighing myself and consistently down a few pounds these days.

 

Finances: i've been listening to dave ramsey and probably going overboard. kind of driving my husband nuts. did an actual budget and now i feel a bit ill particularly when i am faced with our student loans. i think it's going to be tight around here on the new salary but also feeling empowered about it? trying to keep our household weekly grocery/home bill to $120 which actually seems totally doable now that I'm in it. what is it about money that strikes so close to identity and self worth that it is visceral? when i think about how badly i used to handle it, my chest feels tight. 

 

today my husband told me that he wishes i were more selfish. i'm taking it as a good reminder from someone i love even though it came in a disagreement sandwich. i'm wondering what being selfish might look like? i think i might start going to a yoga class at bedtime a night a week, fleeing to the gym when my husband gets home from work. going to celtic music concerts, putting on a tv show for the chick and taking  bath (i'm trying to avoid screens. can't decide if it is worth it. other parents chime in, please, i have no idea what i am doing. honestly no idea.). i feel exhausted today and not just physically, soul tired. maybe it's the weather, the grey sky pushing down on me. i wonder if there is always going to be an aching inside of me. 

 

sophie

  • Sad 1

Daily Battle Log, Sweat like an Orc, Live like a Hobbit, and Look like an Elf

“As the Wheel of Time turns, places wear many names. Men wear many names, many faces. Different faces, but always the same man. Yet no one knows the Great Pattern the Wheel weaves, or even the Pattern of an Age. We can only watch, and study, and hope.”  Robert Jordan, The Eye of the World

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1 hour ago, ladyofthebog said:

Water/Supplements: f***

 

SO RELATABLE!!!!

 

1 hour ago, ladyofthebog said:

feel exhausted today and not just physically, soul tired. maybe it's the weather, the grey sky pushing down on me. i wonder if there is always going to be an aching inside of me. 

I get that way too sometimes. I have to remind myself it’s going to pass, because it always does, but in that moment it can be tough to remember.

 

On the subject of ‘selfish’ things, with all the recent travel I have been on my own a lot and realized I have no idea what I like to do apart from kids, spouse and work. There are things I like but didn’t have a clue as to where to start. A friend suggested I try doing one thing a day for myself and write it down first thing in the morning so I stick to it. It took a whole week but it’s starting to become habit. It started off as just taking time to organize my day and slowly worked up to getting back into a hobby I enjoy, getting ice cream every once in a while, going to the store to pick up something I’d like. Some of this means my wife has to take the kids for a bit longer, bet when I finish my stuff I come back energized and ready to tag in. 

 

Also, and I hate to say it because I used to DESPISE IT, doing a gratitude list of 2-3 things I am thankful for first thing in the morning and adding to it as I go through the day. It keeps me more mindful about the good things and I look at it again at the end of the day. Lately that has been helping to keep those dark emotional clouds at bay.

 

Hope some of thus helps. Even if it doesn’t, just know you aren’t alone.

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On 4/16/2019 at 9:11 PM, ReturnOfTheDad said:

 

I get that way too sometimes. I have to remind myself it’s going to pass, because it always does, but in that moment it can be tough to remember.

 

On the subject of ‘selfish’ things, with all the recent travel I have been on my own a lot and realized I have no idea what I like to do apart from kids, spouse and work. There are things I like but didn’t have a clue as to where to start. A friend suggested I try doing one thing a day for myself and write it down first thing in the morning so I stick to it. It took a whole week but it’s starting to become habit. It started off as just taking time to organize my day and slowly worked up to getting back into a hobby I enjoy, getting ice cream every once in a while, going to the store to pick up something I’d like. Some of this means my wife has to take the kids for a bit longer, bet when I finish my stuff I come back energized and ready to tag in. 

 

Also, and I hate to say it because I used to DESPISE IT, doing a gratitude list of 2-3 things I am thankful for first thing in the morning and adding to it as I go through the day. It keeps me more mindful about the good things and I look at it again at the end of the day. Lately that has been helping to keep those dark emotional clouds at bay.

 

Hope some of thus helps. Even if it doesn’t, just know you aren’t alone.

all of this helps, honestly. and i feel you on the gratitude list thing. i'm seeped in new age culture having grown up where i did and in my twenties really rebelled against it whole hog. to be fair, there's a lot of wishy washy BS but there's some good that can be extracted from things like "gratitude" and "mindfulness" and that ilk. today, i was sitting in the back yard reading (just finished hillbilly elegy! found it in a local roadside library. are those popular everywhere? my neighorhood has a bunch and it's great. i digress) while my daughter played. The sun was filtering through the trees and a cacophony of bird sounds exclaimed, "spring!" i felt so much gratitude for that time. as if everything in the landscape was breathing, "thank you." it felt good. i also think, shoot, i may need to live somewhere where there is sun throughout the year but that's not as high vibe of a thought. lol. 

i feel you on this selfishness thing. i need to look up yoga classes nearby and put them on the actual calendar. 

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Daily Battle Log, Sweat like an Orc, Live like a Hobbit, and Look like an Elf

“As the Wheel of Time turns, places wear many names. Men wear many names, many faces. Different faces, but always the same man. Yet no one knows the Great Pattern the Wheel weaves, or even the Pattern of an Age. We can only watch, and study, and hope.”  Robert Jordan, The Eye of the World

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Been out at the prancing pony (day 17,18, 19)

  Out at the beach house with the little bean. Half way through, I got sick. It's just a cold but it has my on my ass. Thank goodness, my parents offered to watch the bug today and my plans are drinking loads of throat coat tea and water, supplementing like nuts and catching up on GOT. I'm on call from 430-8 pm. hopefully I won't be called out or I'm going to have to mask up. The plus side of being sick is all I am dreaming of all the healthy shiz I am going to do when my body has expelled this foul cold from my body:

- netti pottt

- obsess over veggies

- hydrate

- more yoga

- cannot wait to workout

- less stress

 

has anyone else found a correlation between hitting it really hard at the gym and then getting sick? i was probably on the edge and then the day before leaving for the beach house i worked out really, really hard. 

yesterday,  literally ate oatmeal, rice + broth for lunch and dinner. feel super weak.

 

pics from the last weeks:

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5D6BA3CE-9730-4182-B591-EBABC6504D8B.JPG.a47e36562ccfa340629688bc3b9df4d8.JPG

FC5B2159-F91A-4EDB-8337-A0ACB462D5D3.JPG.783dd28ed7d3b87502fefb63caa2f71c.JPG79031812-70E0-4EC9-95DA-A44F16D5081B.thumb.JPG.6558ac6d621557eacd1de6e891365a70.JPG

IMG_2211.jpg.ceff1399578bc409b2ddabe22bb84f1a.jpg

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Daily Battle Log, Sweat like an Orc, Live like a Hobbit, and Look like an Elf

“As the Wheel of Time turns, places wear many names. Men wear many names, many faces. Different faces, but always the same man. Yet no one knows the Great Pattern the Wheel weaves, or even the Pattern of an Age. We can only watch, and study, and hope.”  Robert Jordan, The Eye of the World

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8 hours ago, Rusk said:

Lovely assortment of photos.  Totally not jealous that you did not experience flurries this week.

 

 

Stress is stress.  Your body cannot tell the difference between the stress at the gym, stress at home or what have you.  Cortisol is cortisol.

thank you! overloading on the cortisol! aiy, the flurries.... which reminds me of a blizzard which reminds me of dairy queen blizzards which are just an abomination. an abomination i adore.

6 hours ago, Snarkyfishguts said:

Lovely photos!

 

I agree with Rusk. I often get sick after a great workout. I like to imagine all the toxins fleeing my body, but in truth, I think I just need a little more rest those days. Maybe same for you?

ooh! thank you, snarky! i feel like the toxin theory even if it isn't right feels good to think. that way, it feels like the sickness is productive rather than just suck.

 

 

hey! i did get called out! the person i went to see is lovely so not so bad. already back home. now for charting... let's just hope my work phone doesn't ring again.....

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Daily Battle Log, Sweat like an Orc, Live like a Hobbit, and Look like an Elf

“As the Wheel of Time turns, places wear many names. Men wear many names, many faces. Different faces, but always the same man. Yet no one knows the Great Pattern the Wheel weaves, or even the Pattern of an Age. We can only watch, and study, and hope.”  Robert Jordan, The Eye of the World

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Day 71:

 Still feeling a bit sick/weak and have infected the rest of my family. Hopefully didn't infect any patients this weekend when I was the only nurse on call. Hospice is so hard sometimes. This Sunday was one of those days. 

Snooze time: I took Nyquil last night and it passed me out but I also feel like I am lergy from it? The little cute-kin woke up a few times but I was able to soothe her back to sleep pretty well. Her little nose is so stuffy! She's sleeping right now. 

Water/Supplements: tea has been endless with the exception of Sunday when I was running around like nuts taking care of other people and I forgot to eat/drink fluids

Meals:

700 am: quinoa pancakes w/ blueberries

1130 am: barley vegetable soup with  a piece of bread

dinner: i have no idea. 

Fitness: nothing! i feel weak still. 

Finances: been keeping the path. buying this book on amazon: 

https://www.amazon.com/Language-Life-Festival-Moyers-1995-07-05/dp/B01K92FZNU/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=bill+moyers+poetry&qid=1556657623&s=gateway&sr=8-1

i'd like to get into writing poetry again. to use the parlance of my people, i feel like my chakras are blocked and my creative self is struggling. losing that part of myself feels like a shallow breath. i don't even care if anyone ever sees my poetry. i want to tap into that invisible part of me. how finances section became talk of invisible selves is testament to my flighty self :p

 

hopefully feel better tomorrow!!

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Daily Battle Log, Sweat like an Orc, Live like a Hobbit, and Look like an Elf

“As the Wheel of Time turns, places wear many names. Men wear many names, many faces. Different faces, but always the same man. Yet no one knows the Great Pattern the Wheel weaves, or even the Pattern of an Age. We can only watch, and study, and hope.”  Robert Jordan, The Eye of the World

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Day 72: Got that Lembas Feelinngggg

 Hoping the sunny weather will keep. It's glorious! Just absolutely glorious. About to watch Endgame for a matinee with a few friends. Excited!! Should I make cookies while the child naps? Hard to say.

I spent some of the morning thrifting books. Love doing that. My parents owned a used bookstore when I was growing up (still sell books online but much less romantic) so I got the book search deep in my bones. I remember our garage full of boxes of books. I'd drink juice boxes and spend what felt like hours (who knows what child time translates to?) breaking open boxes to see what mystery was lodged inside. 

Water/Supplements: bringing water to the movie. i'll be pissing the movie away.

Meals:

700 am: quinoa pancakes again

1130 am: barley vegetable soup with salad and roast veggie sandwich

dinner: beans and rice most probs

Fitness: went to the gym last night, pilates today

Finances: nothing special to report. 

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Daily Battle Log, Sweat like an Orc, Live like a Hobbit, and Look like an Elf

“As the Wheel of Time turns, places wear many names. Men wear many names, many faces. Different faces, but always the same man. Yet no one knows the Great Pattern the Wheel weaves, or even the Pattern of an Age. We can only watch, and study, and hope.”  Robert Jordan, The Eye of the World

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New challenge up!

  • Like 2

Daily Battle Log, Sweat like an Orc, Live like a Hobbit, and Look like an Elf

“As the Wheel of Time turns, places wear many names. Men wear many names, many faces. Different faces, but always the same man. Yet no one knows the Great Pattern the Wheel weaves, or even the Pattern of an Age. We can only watch, and study, and hope.”  Robert Jordan, The Eye of the World

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I'm making another hobbit! Hello, y'all. It has been many days. My intention is to start up with the next challenge. Important news! I am pregnant! Im just entering 23 weeks. It's been a (knock on wood) wonderful pregnancy so far, been working out doing barre about 6 days a week and just feeling good in my body :) Running with that second trimester glow and energy bump right now. I'll keep updated a bit more perhaps later but short version- 

- this year has been hard particularly for my extended family but coming through and feeling the whisperings of spring!

- my main goals for now are to continue to be active during this pregnancy, continue to make meditation, mental health a priority

 

Hope you are all doing well. 

 

Lady of the Bog (though now more of the forests but, hey, bogs are mystical lands of change and becoming in my book so I'll keep itIMG_7983.jpg.ffe57cebc8bf0e921a0ddd8fbc03844e.jpg

le second trimester glow, remember this when in end of third trimester slog 

IMG_7876.JPG.c1ff3a09fbeb599212b163d925b7decf.JPG

22 weeks- aka 6 months preggo!

 

154661382_977840797138_8389234010221423290_o.jpg.47e51a5fce31fd4bee1e80920910777e.jpg

21 weekssss

 

❤️❤️❤️ 

 

  • Wow 2

Daily Battle Log, Sweat like an Orc, Live like a Hobbit, and Look like an Elf

“As the Wheel of Time turns, places wear many names. Men wear many names, many faces. Different faces, but always the same man. Yet no one knows the Great Pattern the Wheel weaves, or even the Pattern of an Age. We can only watch, and study, and hope.”  Robert Jordan, The Eye of the World

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Grats on the baby! Glow is definitely the right word, you look great!
How's the "new" place been doing?
Keep going strong!
 

On 4/27/2019 at 10:31 AM, ladyofthebog said:

has anyone else found a correlation between hitting it really hard at the gym and then getting sick? i was probably on the edge and then the day before leaving for the beach house i worked out really, really hard. 

yesterday,  literally ate oatmeal, rice + broth for lunch and dinner. feel super weak.

Heavy physical exertion takes a toll on your immune system right after and a little bit into your recovery. Its a good idea to include citrus fruits in your recovery snacks and meals following the heavy exertion as they serve at least 3 very valuable functions in a workout diet. I'll often drink an "airborne" almost every day when I'm lifting heavy.

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11 hours ago, "Jake" said:

Getting close to baby time, How are things?
Wishing you the best.

Yes!! Getting very close! Feeling pretty good but definitely slowing down. Can’t wait to meet the little one! Still doing barre and I think it’s doing me well this pregnancy! Highly recommend prenatal barre blend for pregnant people- I feel like it has prepared my body well for pregnancy. Not really having any untoward pregnancy issues except being tired! Last pregnancy I ran pretty late into the pregnancy and did life weights but found it harder to keep consistent. B1AC1411-BA50-49A2-9D14-F62353518F54.thumb.jpeg.d0f7ab59432880b298f1421ca52b3599.jpeg
More recently- earlier this week, 35 weeks 6AA22B46-31BD-4A0D-B113-DF218438CDA7.thumb.jpeg.834041622571e759f1ee12fa7f4d3aa8.jpegI think this is 33 weeks, before baby shower 

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Daily Battle Log, Sweat like an Orc, Live like a Hobbit, and Look like an Elf

“As the Wheel of Time turns, places wear many names. Men wear many names, many faces. Different faces, but always the same man. Yet no one knows the Great Pattern the Wheel weaves, or even the Pattern of an Age. We can only watch, and study, and hope.”  Robert Jordan, The Eye of the World

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Though should say that what I mean by untoward pregnancy issues I mean sore back or sciatica or pelvic pain or that kind of thing- definitely go pee a million times a night and every thirty minutes during the day, GERD! Though that’s diminishing (I wonder if she’s descending), I walk slowly and I can’t see my feet! Etc etc etc but feel like all to be expected when super pregnant! 

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Daily Battle Log, Sweat like an Orc, Live like a Hobbit, and Look like an Elf

“As the Wheel of Time turns, places wear many names. Men wear many names, many faces. Different faces, but always the same man. Yet no one knows the Great Pattern the Wheel weaves, or even the Pattern of an Age. We can only watch, and study, and hope.”  Robert Jordan, The Eye of the World

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