Terah - It was never about the food

[Snarkyfishguts]

On 5/27/2018 at 6:54 AM, Terah said:

I did some research and came across this article:

Souce

Whoa that is pretty cool! I didn’t know that!

[Terah]

4 hours ago, Snarkyfishguts said:

Whoa that is pretty cool! I didn’t know that!

Neither did I, but I love the effect ACV has on me

[Terah]

Monday 

Goals smashed. 

It was hot today, but I still got all the stuff done that I wanted. 

The heat isn't bothering me as much as it used to. I don't get sick anymore (headaches and nauseated) from it. 

It still drains my energy though, but I just kept going

[Terah]

Tuesday 

It was so hot today (30c / 86f). But I did all the adulting that needed to be done, and walked my oldest sons class to their gym class as I do every week. 

Also went to dancehall and zumba class. It was so much fun And there was airconditioning there

I fasted and stayed below 1200 kcal. Wich was hard, because I was so hungry. Not cold or tired or cranky though, so I battled trough. Tomorrow there will be no fasting and I will eat approximately 2000 kcal. I'm really looking forward to breakfast

[Snarkyfishguts]

 Yum. Breakfast! I hope it’s amazing

[Terah]

10 hours ago, Snarkyfishguts said:

 Yum. Breakfast! I hope it’s amazing

It was. I had a bowl of crunchy muesli and it was amazing. I'm stuffed right now

[Terah]

People have been complimenting me on my weight loss and I found it so hard to accept the compliments. I try to say 'thank you', but I notice it doesn't sound proud and I look away. Also, I see my husband noticed, and is trying to let me bring it up instead of starting about it himself. I haven't yet. 

 

I've been thinking of why this is. As a kid (until the age of 12) I was bullied because of my weight. At the age of 8 the doctor send me to a dietician, because I was too heavy. Every time I went there I had to stand on the scale and got compliments when I lost weight or stayed the same. At home my mom tried to follow the dieticians advice. But looking back I now see she struggled with food herself: one time honoring the newest diet, the next time eating all the cookies. 

Which resulted in telling me one time that I couldn't have more than one apple or 2 slices of bread. And the next letting me and my sister help her empty the cooky cabinet... 

 

In my teenage years I got in control of my own eating and started reading about diets myself. I did manage to lose enough weight so I was in a healthy weight category. But I kept seeing myself as fat. My mom complemented me on how I looked. She just tried to be a good mom. But I kept hearing a bit of jealousy in her compliments. I still don't know if that was imagined or not. 

Don't get me wrong: I love my mom, and she's done a great job raising me and my sister. But I do think the way she handled food and weight twisted my view of those things. 

 

And I think, because I saw myself as fat, I never tried to maintain that weight. And every time there was a stressful event I put on some more weight. Which is why I have to lose it now again. 

 

Realizing this brings me a step further un the right direction, but I still got a lot of work to do in the mental health department. 

 

Tl;dr: I have a hard time accepting compliments about my weight loss, probably because if stuff that happened in my childhood. 

[klaybae]

I really struggle with accepting (and giving) compliments about weight loss. Growing up, I often didn’t eat during severe depressions. I would lose weight, and people would compliment how great I was looking, what a good person I was for choosing to lose weight, and completely ignored it as a sign of mental and spiritual unwellness. It felt like they were gleefully salting a very large and open wound. 

 

Now I just really struggle to compliment weight loss, unless it’s a close friend and I know the loss is intentional + know their big why. It feels too much like I’m validating the belief that we are less worthy if we are fat and vice versa. 

 

Anyway, thanks for sharing your thoughts on all this. It’s possibly something we could all examine a little deeper.

[Terah]

Thanks for sharing Klaybea <4*

It's good to know I'm not the only one struggling with this. 

 

*not a euphemisms or a typo. It's how we doodlies post a heart <3, only better because 4 is more

[deftona]

I completely agree with Klaybae. I hate when people comment on my weight loss and I steer away from congratulating other people for it too because it's such a loaded issue. Weight loss can happen for a large number of reasons, a lot of them being bad reasons. Complimenting people on being smaller serves to further instill the "fat is bad" mentality and I do not agree with that. Nobody's worth is tied to their body size. When people commented on my weight loss in the past I told them as politely as I could that my body was none of their business, and it doesn't happen much any more. I shut the conversation down immediately unless it comes from TH because  he knows the intricate details of my journey and his congratulations reflect the whole picture. He isn't just congratulating me for being smaller. He is congratulating me for my hard work and my resiliance. 

 

I don't know why it's socially acceptable to comment on anyone's body, ever. Even if they think it's a compliment. 

[klaybae]

47 minutes ago, deftona said:

I don't know why it's socially acceptable to comment on anyone's body, ever. Even if they think it's a compliment. 

THIS x1000. And I get so angry when I am told to just “learn to take a compliment” because there are so many MORE MEANINGFUL and sincere ways to compliment me 

 

huffs in anime 

[Terah]

1 hour ago, deftona said:

I don't know why it's socially acceptable to comment on anyone's body, ever. Even if they think it's a compliment. 

So true ((hugs)) I needed to hear this <4 

[Tanktimus the Encourager]

I have found that complementing hair or outfit choices (eg. that's a great color combination) is generally pretty safe, but often choose not to comment on anything else.

5 hours ago, Terah said:

 

*not a typo. It's how we doodlies post a heart <3, only better because 4 is more

Also Terah, Doodlie bylaws clearly state if an asterisk is used to denote a footnote in a thread said footnote must indicate a clear declaration of whether or not something is a euphemism, even if other information is included in the footnote.

[Terah]

1 hour ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

Also Terah, Doodlie bylaws clearly state if an asterisk is used to denote a footnote in a thread said footnote must indicate a clear declaration of whether or not something is a euphemism, even if other information is included in the footnote.

Thank you for notifying me of this gross oversight. It has been altered

 

1 hour ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

I have found that complementing hair or outfit choices (eg. that's a great color combination) is generally pretty safe, but often choose not to comment on anything else.

But don't do that too often. Because people will expect a compliment and if you forget they can think of it as an insult. 

I'm pancaking now, aren't I? 

[Terah]

Wednesday 

Breakfast was great as I resently stated. I felt so stuffed and I really had to remind myself to eat throughout the day. The heat didn't help in that regard. I managed to eat my kcal, but it was challenging. (Homemade) pizza for dinner helped though

But now I feel like I never want to eat again. 

 

I've been reading and watching YouTube videos about prolonged fasts and I have been thinking of trying a 48 hour one. It's supposed to be super healthy and I'm curious to see what it will do to me. Tomorrow will be the perfect day as SH won't be eating home, I will be super busy all day and I already got stuff for a true kiddy meal for the boys in my pantry. And zumba is tomorrow morning, and apparently it's a good thing to start a prolonged fast with a cardio workout. Friday is also a busy day, and I will eat (a light) dinner on Friday again. 

But off course: if I get outrageously hungry I will stop this experiment and eat my planned 1200 kcal for that day. 

 

[Snarkyfishguts]

14 hours ago, deftona said:

I don't know why it's socially acceptable to comment on anyone's body, ever. Even if they think it's a compliment. 

AMEN. 

15 hours ago, klaybae said:

I really struggle with accepting (and giving) compliments about weight loss. Growing up, I often didn’t eat during severe depressions. I would lose weight, and people would compliment how great I was looking, what a good person I was for choosing to lose weight, and completely ignored it as a sign of mental and spiritual unwellness. 

The obsession with fat is so toxic. That must've been so difficult to deal with .

15 hours ago, Terah said:

Thanks for sharing Klaybea <4*

It's good to know I'm not the only one struggling with this. 

You are not alone. It's no one's business how you look, like Deffy said. I struggle with anyone making comments on my physical appearance unless they are close friends or family and know me and what I'm going through. But it's just like. when people say shit like that, I feel less human, like I'm only as good as my body looks to someone. Which I know isn't always the intention of the compliment, but it just sends out huge alarms in my system.  

Thank you for sharing this vulnerable moment. I really relate to your experience, and I'm so happy and proud of you. You took a difficult moment, reflected on it, and it's not going to hold you back. YEAH!

 

 

[Terah]

7 hours ago, Snarkyfishguts said:

But it's just like. when people say shit like that, I feel less human, like I'm only as good as my body looks to someone.

Reading this I realized the people that cimplimented me are pretty vain. Maybe they just reflect their own insecurities... 

Food for thought, thanks

[Terah]

Thursday 

27 Hours into my fast and I'm doing great. I suspected to be low on energy, but I could run off and do hours of zumba if there was a class now  I also killed it during zumba this morning

I did suspect a little brain fog, but I feel clearer in my head than I've been in a long time. 

The hardest part was in the morning when my brain told me there was no way I could possibly do this. But I practiced mindfulness and got through it. 

There were also a few unpleasant physical sensations, but they faded rather quickly. 

I'll see how I feel when I wake up tomorrow, but if I still feel this good I'll fast until dinner tomorrow evening (that'll be 48 hours of fasting). 

 

I've been reading the obesity code. I think this is a must read for everyone who wishes to lose weight. Eat less, move more doesn't work in the long run amd this book explains why and how to remedy it. 

[klaybae]

Congrats! I find the first 24 hours the most difficult, until day four or five when it feels gross for a couple days. I really enjoy throwing fasting into my life as I can (for things like productivity and insulin control). I’m glad you’re having a pleasant experience!

[Terah]

Friday 

48 hours of fasting done! 

The last hour I experienced low blood pressure, but overall it went great Dinner was delicious (just soup with bread). Like they say in the Netherlands: "hunger makes raw beans taste sweet"

This is not something I'll do every week. But maybe once every 3 months could be a good thing. 

 

After dinner there was dancehall class. We practiced 2 routines, one of them was new. It was hard work mentally, but I love the challenge

[Terah]

Saturday 

My plan was to eat 3 healthy meals and hit maintenance kcal (2000). I did have 3 healthy meals, but I couldn't fit in the 2000 kcal. I managed to hit 1471. And I am stuffed

 

So I won't be fasting tomorrow either. Just 3 healthy meals, no snacks and staying under 2000 kcal. Tomorrow will also be a very active day, as I will go swimming with the boys in the morning, and have a 2/3 hour dance rehearsal in the afternoon. 

[Terah]

Sunday

I ate 3 healthy meals and made it to 1817 kcal. Not too shabby

So I will fast again tomorrow. I'm not sure yet if it will be an 18 or a 24 hour fast. I'll just listen to my body and see how it will make me feel. 

My plan is to fast on Monday, Wednesday and Friday this week. Off course I will alter it if my body tells me to. 

 

This morning I went swimming with the boys and in the afternoon we had showcase training with the dancehall class. It was not very intensive, but we had fun

 

My results this week:

 

[Terah]

Monday 

 

Because I didn't had time to rest yesterday, as I normally do on Sundays, I was really tired today. 

I did do my workout, fasted until lunch, had 2 healthy meals and made it around 1100 kcal. I really couldn't eat anymore. That 48 hour fast really reduced my appetite. 

I almost got everything done that needed to be done, but I moved slowly because I was tired. 

 

I'm going to bed early today, and hopefully will be more rested tomorrow. 

[Pickle6415]

Monday 
 
Because I didn't had time to rest yesterday, as I normally do on Sundays, I was really tired today. 
I did do my workout, fasted until lunch, had 2 healthy meals and made it around 1100 kcal. I really couldn't eat anymore. That 48 hour fast really reduced my appetite. 
I almost got everything done that needed to be done, but I moved slowly because I was tired. 
 
I'm going to bed early today, and hopefully will be more rested tomorrow. 

I'm still lurking... And cheering you on [emoji322]

Sent from my LG-H932 using Tapatalk

[Terah]

Tuesday 

A non fasting day with 3 healthy meals adding up to 1767 kcal. 

Zumba and dancehall class were a lot of fun. There is this one zumba routine where we all dance in a circle with each other. It allows for more interaction than other routines and its just really fun