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TheGreyJedi-Ranger

Jedi Finally Finds Some Balance!!

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3 hours ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

Here's how you make awesome French Press coffee.

Figure out your coffee to water ratio ahead of time. If you have a grinder, grind the beans right before you use them. Use a coarse grind. If you have ground beans disregard that step, try and buy coarse grounds.

Put the grounds in the bottom of the French Press.

Pour in just enough boiling water to wet the beans and let them sit for 1 minute. This allows the flavors to bloom and what makes it worth using the French Press.

After that minute is up, pour in boiling water and let it sit 3 minutes. After that three minutes is up, then you press down with the screen. Just let the weight of your hand and gravity do the work. If it's stiff, use light pressure and move it down slowly.

Pour and enjoy.

 

There will be a little bit of sediment in the bottom of your cup when you are done. This is a combination of oils and tiny particles that got through the screen, that's normal.

Bless. This is awesome, I can't wait to try it!

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I did not work out today. I havent been feeling well recently. I get headaches every afternoon and I've been feeling super bluesy and sad over the past few days. I'm not sure why, there's nothing going on. I'm just sad and bluesy. It's making me eat more and I end up feeling sick because I eat too much. I'm not sure what's up. I'm not screwing up my sleep and that's the usual culprit. I'm better about staying hydrated too. Idk what's up. It's just frustrating.

I think I'm going to take a long, relaxing shower and take an early night. Hopefully that will help.

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Well, happy Friday everyone?

 

It does seem to be Friday and I definitely feel better than I did yesterday. Emotionally anyway. I'm a little nervous about what's going to happen once the afternoon hits. But then, on the other hand, when I finally went into my bedroom and laid down in the dark reading quietly and listened to music, I felt better fairly quickly. I don't know if I just headached myself out or what. It's weird. I've definitely missed a couple of workouts because of it. I'm not feeling the missing of workouts anymore if I can avoid it. I have plans for one today.

 

Wish me luck all

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Okay so I've figured out the culprit behind my headaches. They're sinus headaches. Joy. The congestion and sinus pressure is part of why I've been feeling like an actual Trash Panda (tm). I'm constantly congested and only keeping Vicks Vaporub on my face so far has helped cut the congestion at all. But that last like.. 5 minutes? IDK. But I can't even try calling my allergist again until Monday. I just don't know what to do. I'm miserable. Sudafed has done zilch. My body is trying to expel the mucus so much so I'm coughing insanely a lot. I tried working out tonight and it was without a doubt the most difficult workout I've ever done. I'm weak and tired and I can feel the mucus in my chest and throat that my body is trying to cough out. I couldn't even do my third round. I could barely finish the second. I need my third allergy medicine but I don't know what I can do right now. Honestly the only answer I'm coming up with is 'not much.' I'm really hoping that I don't end up with a sinus infection, that would suck hardcore. Especially since I'm supposed to be going on vacation in September. I'm in mucus-congestion hell. I think I'm going to go make myself a cup of decaf "mama I don't feel good tea" with lots of lemon and honey. That's the only remedy I'm feeling like right now. And a hot shower later. 

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Wow things have been kinda sucky recently.

 

So for starters I realized I've been dealing with extreme anxiety to the point where I just started to shut down. As an independent contractor, I'm required to pay taxes 4 times a year (?????) and I think I'm coming up on my first quarter and I have ZERO clue how to figure out the millions of crap that I have to pay. I need to go to a tax place this month but I'm in terror that they're going to tell me an amount that I literally cannot pay, and on top of that I may not be able to go to visit my friend next month if this tax crap happens the way I'm worrying. I haven't told her because I feel like I'm going to let her down if this happens. We've been planning on this trip for ages and I'm just... I'm excessively stressed.

 

The stress has left me with zero motivation to do anything. I can't even explain how little I've been cooking and around the house. I lose my ability to function sometime in the early/late afternoon basically every day, leaving me with chores undone all over the house, stuff for my Youtube channel unfinished, and basically no workouts done. It's so hard to function these days. I don't know what to do anymore. 

 

Scratch that. I'm going to figure it the frick out. So I struggle with the afternoons. So I need to get the hard stuff done in the mornings and make sure my priorities are okay.

 

So for the rest of today:

- Gonna struggle-bus my way through the rest of this work stuff

- Gonna sit and let my laptop charge in the living room while I finish up the editing of my Youtube video if I can

- If there's time after that, I'm going to go fold laundry and catch up on my Youtube channels

- After that is DnD. While I'm listening to all that I'll probably let my iMovie file convert (If I finish up)

 

Tomorrow:

- Get a workout in first thing

- Make a grocery list early

- Start getting work done fairly early as well. 

- Go to grocery store and talk to the tax people while I'm out

- Leave rest of the day open. If I get bored and can function late, I'll finish my blog post for my channel. 

 

There's basically nothing I can do about this right now. So I just have to make use of as many functional hours as I have.

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Okay so. I didn't get that workout yesterday. It just didn't happen. But that's okay.

 

I didn't get the tax stuff straight yet either but I ended up talking to my boss and he's going to send me some good accountants I can talk to, and also gave me some tips on how to handle itemizing deductions. Like, I work from home. I can claim part of my Internet and phone bills as work expenses and my traveling to and from the office as well!!! So I'm going to start doing that. It'll make things easier on me tax-wise.

 

So as far as workouts. I'm planning on doing one tonight if I can. But I do think I'm going to take a break from doing the actual strength workouts right now with everything I'm trying to deal with body and stress-wise. So for tonight, I'm going to do one of the dancing workouts from the FabFitFun website, and then for future workouts I'm going to focus on just going for walks again when I'm not leaving my house. I'm stagnating at home again, and I'd really rather not. It's not good for me at all. So going outside for walks it is. It doesn't matter what my workout is, my body is going to probably rebel anyway so I'd rather do something that doesn't tax me so much. Not right now. 

 

My goals for the rest of today:

 

- Get some kind of movement in

- Finish the blogging stuff for my Youtube Page

- Tidy up my kitchen after cooking disaster last night

- take out my trash, including the mess of boxes my cat and dog have spread around the front of the house from trying to play with them.

 

 

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9 hours ago, TheGreyJedi-Ranger said:

 

I didn't get the tax stuff straight yet either but I ended up talking to my boss and he's going to send me some good accountants I can talk to, and also gave me some tips on how to handle itemizing deductions. Like, I work from home. I can claim part of my Internet and phone bills as work expenses and my traveling to and from the office as well!!! So I'm going to start doing that. It'll make things easier on me tax-wise.

 

 

This sounds great! I'm happy your boss could help you like this :)

 

As for working out: go get it!!

 

X9MD.gif

 

As long as it makes you feel better. Keep it going, you're doing amazing <3

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13 hours ago, Ensi said:

 

This sounds great! I'm happy your boss could help you like this :)

 

As for working out: go get it!!

 

X9MD.gif

 

As long as it makes you feel better. Keep it going, you're doing amazing <3

It made a huge difference in my stress levels. I'm still trying to get my energy levels back up, but that's a work in progress and it dependent on how I feel on a given day. 

 

I'm still struggling with the working out, just between time and the fact that I lose energy markedly over the course of the day. But my doctor's appointment is tomorrow morning which makes me both nervous and excited! I'm so ready to figure out what's up with my body so that we can try fixing it. But also, I know I'm of a higher weight than I once was and I'm still nervous that I'll have difficulties with my doctor due to that... Especially since I never did get my previous medical records >_> I'm sure that they have some paperwork to get access to my old records if it's needed. 

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Ok. So. Life.

 

I did a workout Thursday night. I know, I'm shocked too. I was actually feeling like it for once, rather than feeling like the thing on the bottom of someone's shoe. It's insane. I did a dance workout from the FabFitFun website. I couldn't keep up very well but it was definitely better than nothing for sure.

 

Friday was... interesting. Doctor's visit went well. They got me a refill on my allergy prescription (PRAISE) and they started me on an anti-depressant/anxiety and are putting me in therapy. Which I think will help. I got bloodwork done to make sure I don't have any thyroid issues and I'm still in good shape thyroid-wise. Two doses of the nasal spray later and I'm feeling sooooo much better with regards to the congestion stuff and the headaches. 

 

I waited until this morning to take my first (half) dose of Celexa because I wanted to have the option to have a beer if I wanted one without embarrassing myself. It ended up being a good idea, my little house was crowded AF and I needed something to take the edge off of my mild claustrophobia. It's weird going from "I spend like 75% of my life with two animals and that's it" to "There are actually seven people in my tiny house wtf." I was struggling. But yeah, the Celexa has done a number on my appetite for sure. I've eaten like an 8th of my normal caloric intake today I think, just haven't felt hungry at all. Even with just a half. But then, that's better than when I first started it last time, where I was essentially throwing up for the first half of the day. Reduced appetite is fairly normal on this medicine. Maybe it'll help me get this intuitive eating thing down a little better. Idk. 

 

I'm not in a great mood right now, but after all that sensory overload earlier my husband got called into work on one of his few off days and I'm just like... *sigh* It's so incredibly frustrating. I'm leaving town on Thursday, and won't be back for a whole week. And he's working Monday/Tuesday as well. I was hoping to relax at home with him tonight tbh. I guess it's time to catch up on my Youtube stuff. Or get a start of some kind. IDK. It's all just frustrating. Also I'm cranky and tired from being sunburnt AF. We went putt-putting with my in-laws and while my foundation had SPF, I didn't have anything on the keyhole openings on my back, so there's some sunburn. Like, it didn't even register that I might have to worry about that. Ugh. 

 

On the other hand, I'm actually getting my basic chores done and I feel more like a functional adult who can manage to get through an entire day without losing every bit of energy and steam I have somewhere in the vicinity of 2pm and 5pm. And I'm leaving on a greyhound bus to go see my best friend in the whole world in exactly 5 days so THAT'S EXCITING.

 

Wish me luck this week as I try to get my work done and deal with bills and the cat and also traveling and trying super bloody hard to spend time with my husband and also Dealing with Meds (tm)

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5 hours ago, TheGreyJedi-Ranger said:

 

Friday was... interesting. Doctor's visit went well. They got me a refill on my allergy prescription (PRAISE) and they started me on an anti-depressant/anxiety and are putting me in therapy. Which I think will help. I got bloodwork done to make sure I don't have any thyroid issues and I'm still in good shape thyroid-wise. Two doses of the nasal spray later and I'm feeling sooooo much better with regards to the congestion stuff and the headaches. 

 

[...]

 

Wish me luck this week as I try to get my work done and deal with bills and the cat and also traveling and trying super bloody hard to spend time with my husband and also Dealing with Meds (tm)

 

I'm so glad you're getting meds and therapy! Don't try too hard this week: your body is adjusting to the meds and all, and it would be great if you could get as much rest as possible. Visiting your friend sounds like a wonderful way to change your surroundings for a while :) Keep rocking!

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16 hours ago, Ensi said:

 

I'm so glad you're getting meds and therapy! Don't try too hard this week: your body is adjusting to the meds and all, and it would be great if you could get as much rest as possible. Visiting your friend sounds like a wonderful way to change your surroundings for a while :) Keep rocking!

Me too, it's beyond time. 

 

I think you're probably right. As far as my OG goals, this challenge has been something of a wash. But I've made so many positive changes and positive movements this month that I really think it's been successful in its own way. I'm just trying to make it through the next few days to go visit my friend and when I come back I can build a new routine for myself to help with keeping my sanity on track. 

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Oh wow it's already Wednesday where did my life go.

 

Anyway y'all should know that the past few days I've been finally feeling like a human being again rather than the gross thing that's growing in the bottom of my trash can because the trash men leave it open and then it rains a lot here. I don't lose my motivation to life at like 2-3pm every day anymore. It's absolutely incredible. I'm shook. IDK which of my meds did it but I'm so pleased. Intensely so.

 

Working out hasn't been a thing at all but I'm going to be doing myself a 13+ hour bus ride tomorrow so that's a thing. But I'm kinda stoked as well as being super nervous? IDK. My dreams were weird though, which means my anxiety is acting out a little. Like I dreamed I was a server again *shivers* what a hashbrown nightmare for real. Never again ladies and gents. Not unless it's a choice between that and starving. 

 

But yeah today I'm going to get a bit more work done (I've powered through a bunch of work the past two days with Mr. Right being gone so that I could do v. little today), take the cat to the vet for her follow up and boosters this afternoon, then finish up packing my suitcase tonight aside from the stuff I'll need in the morning. Also baking cookies today. That's a thing. Then I'll sleep in a bit tomorrow so that I'm okay on the bus and get myself ready to handle the trip. Then I'll be with my bestie for 5 days! eeeeeeekkkkkkk! I'm so excited :D

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Catching up catching up catching up!~

 

THIS:

 

On 9/5/2018 at 10:33 AM, TheGreyJedi-Ranger said:

Anyway y'all should know that the past few days I've been finally feeling like a human being again rather than the gross thing that's growing in the bottom of my trash can because the trash men leave it open and then it rains a lot here. I don't lose my motivation to life at like 2-3pm every day anymore. It's absolutely incredible. I'm shook. IDK which of my meds did it but I'm so pleased. Intensely so.

 

Is so so so so so so great.  SO GREAT. <3  And I'm so happy to hear it!!!!!!!!!

 

I had to do quarterly taxes at work and it was a PITA.  Granted mine were only payroll taxes, but it's still like "^&@)%@#".  I hope your accountant can put you on the right path, for me even if that stuff is easy, it's still intimidating! ><

 

Have a GREAT TIME visiting!!!! :DDDDD

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