I'm Not New, I'm Re-New

[Fearnaut]

Jason, 39

Portland, OR

Having been a member off and on for the last several years, I've had many struggles(and made some enemies which I'm not proud of). I've battled, I've lost and rebounded, only to lose again.

 

I have been at a stalemate with diabetes, but the real struggle is mental health. With the big 4-0 looming over my head at the end of this year, I was already not coping well, then last October, my girlfriend of over 10 years ended our relationship and moved away(with another guy). I ended up homeless, which was bad enough itself, but she also refused to let me see my dog. My dog is my baby and losing him, being homeless and with the mental health issues, I snapped and tried to kill myself. I ended up in a psych ward for two weeks, then a treatment facility for three months. 

 

I'm now medicated, renting a room and seeing an amazing Russian girl.

I lost myself, which is strange for me to say, because I've never accepted the concept of self, as I believed I was nothing.

 

One other good thing, was losing 30 lbs in that time. I'm down to 310 from a highest of 385-ish.

 

After some soul searching, I'm finally finding who I am and who I want to be.

I'm back here, starting from the beginning. 

 

 

[Elastigirl]

Welcome back! This is a good place full of encouraging people.

[RjMaan]

I am glad you are back.