Echo level up: Being awesome and breathing deeply

[Echoceanic]

Hi!

 

*waves*

 

So, I was going to do a theme this challenge and everything, but... ehhhh theme challenges don't seem to be much different than non-theme ones, aside from the time spent hunting for gifs and naming things. And I make these things up as I write them anyway.

This challenge might not have a theme but it will have a focus and that is merging my newfound focus on me and my body and my needs, and managing stress, with my desire to be the woman who does a thousand things a day and that makes people wonder how the hell she does it. But mostly I want to find out what feels like a productive but also relaxing day for me.

So trying to do all the things, but the things also involve resting, goofing off, making memories and just general not tearing my hair off from stress.

 

I am a naturally anxious person. I don't think I have anxiety cause I don't like to self diagnose myself unless it's really obvious, and no panic attacks, but my body is kinda used to a constant strum of alertness and bad things happening. And I really don't want it to ruin my health and the longer it lasts the more of a chance that can happen. The parts you use the most in your brain are the ones that are the easiest to use - why habits and thought patterns are really hard to break - and I've had years of trauma to solidify them. But life has taught me to push no matter what and I am not letting my brain be the reason I go down. 

 

So most of my goals will be figuring things out:

1. Relaxation vs hard work - find a ratio you like and work on not thinking about one when doing the other.
2. Trackers vs daily changes - the worst one is getting up. I know I need to go to bed earlier and that is just a matter of me and my discipline most days, but getting up is not. So this challenge I am working out a way to tweak my tracker so that it doesn't really so much on the time I get up but the speed, aka no snoozing unless waking up in the middle of the night.
3. Alone time vs new experiences - I don't have a lot of friends. I am mostly fine with this though it does give me the sads once in a while. The amount of friends I can see in person amounts to one (others are not from around here), and the amount of friends that I can get to do stuff with me is zero. I am mostly fine with the whole going out alone aspect, but I don't do it a lot because there is not much to do around here.
4. My birthday is on the 9th of October (24). I don't have a lot of plans, aside from no work and something fun.

 

That is pretty much it. 

 

I can't promise I'll be around a lot (don't think anyone can promise that), but if I have this up chances are I'll be around eventually. 

 

Bye!

[Salinger]

Hey Echo, here to support you. Anxiety is a bastard. 

 

My bday is during this challenge too xx

[Tanktimus the Encourager]

This sounds very similar to my challenge this time around.

[Echoceanic]

2 hours ago, Salinger said:

Hey Echo, here to support you. Anxiety is a bastard. 

 

My bday is during this challenge too xx

 

Thanks for being here. And I hope you have an awesome birthday.

 

1 hour ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

This sounds very similar to my challenge this time around.

 

Really, I better check it out then :)) Hope it goes just as you planned or better.  

[RhiaWolfe]

Following and here to cheer you on the whole way! Good goals! 

 

My birthday is also during this challenge! September 20th! 

 

Anxiety is hard... whether you are diagnosed or not, anxiety is always frustrating and difficult to deal with. 

[shaar]

I too, resonate very very much with your challenge and goals.  Totally here for this; we can do it!! 

[Elastigirl]

I like it.

[Arkania]

Great challenge! I have a similar challenge

[Echoceanic]

2 hours ago, RhiaWolfe said:

Following and here to cheer you on the whole way! Good goals! 

 

Yay glad to have ya here. 

 

2 hours ago, RhiaWolfe said:

My birthday is also during this challenge! September 20th! 

 

 

Wow yours is coming up fast, hope you have a nice day!

 

2 hours ago, RhiaWolfe said:

Anxiety is hard... whether you are diagnosed or not, anxiety is always frustrating and difficult to deal with. 

 

A few years back I'd be like 'anxiety, me no way, I'm on the opposite end of the boat' but it turned out I was oh so, so wrong.

 

2 hours ago, shaar said:

Totally here for this; we can do it!!

 

Hell yeah we can!!

 

1 hour ago, Elastigirl said:

I like it.

 

I'm glad.

 

9 minutes ago, Arkania said:

Great challenge! I have a similar challenge

 

Hi, nice to meet you. 

[Arkania]

1 minute ago, Echoceanic said:

Hi, nice to meet you. 

 

Nice to meet you too

And a lot of success for your challenge

 

[Echoceanic]

Just now, Arkania said:

Nice to meet you too

And a lot of success for your challenge

 

Ditto, hope you like the site :))

[Wild Wolf]

Following! And YAYYY for an upcoming birthday! I'm excited to see you "tweak your tracker" . Say that 5x fast haha. And as someone who battles anxiety EVERY day, I stand united with you in the attempt to maintain it and control any kind of "outbreaks". 

 

Wolf

[Echoceanic]

9 minutes ago, Wolfpool said:

Following! And YAYYY for an upcoming birthday! I'm excited to see you "tweak your tracker" . Say that 5x fast haha. And as someone who battles anxiety EVERY day, I stand united with you in the attempt to maintain it and control any kind of "outbreaks". 

 

Hi, glad to see ya here. And thanks, I won't go as far as to self diagnose myself but it's for sure abnormal.

 

My birthday is not really a big deal - aside from cake, but I won't lie and say I don't like celebrating it in a small way.  

[Echoceanic]

Day 1

 

I'll just throw things in paragraphs.

 

Well, today I got up late so I didn't do two things I needed to do, but that's fine - tomorrow. I am frustrated because of the lack of organisation at the school (and the fact I am learning from a textbook that is from the 1950s filled with dated regulations - the book treats pens as a new thing just catching on. PENS.)  But it's not my problem, I can't fix it.

I felt myself get angry, I excused myself and took some deep breaths and told myself why I was upset, just stated it in my head. And boom it helped. It felt weird to get over this that fast, but instead of that making me want to get angry again, I said no, this is a part of being an Adult (capital a) and shut it down. 

 

Still trying to type while not looking at the keyboard, I make less mistakes that way, but wow is it hard to remember and I'm slower (9-12 words a minute). The PC setup is nice.

 

I studied only a little, but wrote a lot (over 2 000 words according to my program but I kinda don't trust it? - usually it's about half that) so let's hope it's better this time around and I don't need another rewrite.

And I finally watched a move (Deadpool - yes, part one not two, I am that slow) and relaxed as much as I could. Still felt the itch to open the freelance site and I caved but that should stop soon, I need to get used to it. No exercise even though I planned on it both yesterday and today but whatever.

 

I also tried avocados for the first time today - they are super expensive here but they were in a salad I found. They are the salmon of fruits, but I like the fish more. 

 

Goal for now is to wash my hair and go to bed early. 

 

BYE!

[jonfirestar]

23 hours ago, Echoceanic said:

 

So, I was going to do a theme this challenge and everything, but... ehhhh theme challenges don't seem to be much different than non-theme ones, aside from the time spent hunting for gifs and naming things. And I make these things up as I write them anyway.

IMO the challenge theme serves just one purpose and that is to help generate the initial hype for the challenge. It's difficult to actually stick with the theme itself after a week or two but it is a bit of fun that doesn't matter at all. 

 

13 hours ago, Echoceanic said:

Still trying to type while not looking at the keyboard, I make less mistakes that way, but wow is it hard to remember and I'm slower (9-12 words a minute). The PC setup is nice.

One thing that really helped solidify the whole typing thing in my brain is when I learned how to copy-type. It's in interesting exercise and really hard but it does help to detach your active brain from the passive cognitive action that you are trying to accomplish with typing. Just make sure you don't have any bad habits now because they'll be really hard to get rid of later. 

 

And following, of course. 

 

[Echoceanic]

12 minutes ago, jonfirestar said:

One thing that really helped solidify the whole typing thing in my brain is when I learned how to copy-type. It's in interesting exercise and really hard but it does help to detach your active brain from the passive cognitive action that you are trying to accomplish with typing. Just make sure you don't have any bad habits now because they'll be really hard to get rid of later. 

And following, of course. 

 

Welcome!

 

I log in quite a lot of keyboard time over the day already so I have to incorporate whatever practise I do in that. The hardest is when I get stuck not hitting a certain key and I have to fight the urge to not look down but find it by feel, and that is when I break the streak of not looking down. But considering I'll be writing about 80 000 words these few months I can certainly learn this if I just keep at it. 

[jonfirestar]

47 minutes ago, Echoceanic said:

The hardest is when I get stuck not hitting a certain key and I have to fight the urge to not look down but find it by feel, and that is when I break the streak of not looking down. 

The little bumps are on the keys in the home row for a reason  I find the less I think about it the easier it is. When I try to think about where a particular key is rather than just letting my fingers do their thing it breaks down. I also have several decades worth of practice under my belt and now find typing more natural than writing by hand. 

 

The thing I really need to start doing is proof reading what I write before I post it! 

[RhiaWolfe]

2 hours ago, jonfirestar said:

IMO the challenge theme serves just one purpose and that is to help generate the initial hype for the challenge. It's difficult to actually stick with the theme itself after a week or two but it is a bit of fun that doesn't matter at all. 

 

 

 

I agree with this. Themes are not needed, but for me it adds a bit of fun.  

[WolfDreamer]

On 9/10/2018 at 6:34 AM, Echoceanic said:

but if I have this up chances are I'll be around eventually.

 

Well, we look forward to seeing you when you are around. Let me know if I can help in any way.

[Wild Wolf]

17 hours ago, Echoceanic said:

 

Hi, glad to see ya here. And thanks, I won't go as far as to self diagnose myself but it's for sure abnormal.

 

My birthday is not really a big deal - aside from cake, but I won't lie and say I don't like celebrating it in a small way.  

 

You don't have to diagnose it, but being aware is crucial in itself . And I'm a big fan of birthdays, so I here ya. My birthday's moving forward will be something of a bittersweet thing for me, but they'll still be fun in their own right. Especially if there's strawberry funfetti cake involved...YUM!

 

 

Wolf

[Echoceanic]

1 hour ago, jonfirestar said:

The little bumps are on the keys in the home row for a reason  I find the less I think about it the easier it is. When I try to think about where a particular key is rather than just letting my fingers do their thing it breaks down.

 

The bumps don't help (makes me think too much funny enough).

10 minutes ago, RhiaWolfe said:

2 hours ago, jonfirestar said:

IMO the challenge theme serves just one purpose and that is to help generate the initial hype for the challenge. It's difficult to actually stick with the theme itself after a week or two but it is a bit of fun that doesn't matter at all. 

 

I agree with this. Themes are not needed, but for me it adds a bit of fun.  

 

Yeah it does add fun. I'm just a bit of a perfectionist.  

 

6 minutes ago, Wolfen said:

Well, we look forward to seeing you when you are around. Let me know if I can help in any way.

 

Hi happy to see ya. I sometimes keep the site up while working because of the small amount of notifications. Honestly I'm just glad I can interact with people here about things and see different perspectives and just generally have fun/feel the support. :))) 

 

8 minutes ago, Wolfpool said:

And I'm a big fan of birthdays, so I here ya. My birthday's moving forward will be something of a bittersweet thing for me, but they'll still be fun in their own right. Especially if there's strawberry funfetti cake involved...YUM!

 



 

I have never heard about that cake before  But me and my mom do make a cake on our own, and it's usually chocolate.

 

Day 2

 

Only half a day is done, but lets do this anyway, cause I have things to say.

 

Today I woke up at... 4:20 am. Fully awake. I had to make a decision if I should get up and feel incredibly sleepy at about 10 am, or go to sleep and wake up at 7 am. I picked the second option since I didn't want to bother the person that needs to get ready for work. And I woke up groggy. So, so so groggy.

 

Upside I did some stuff, and took a nice walk because the weather is finally not scorching. Downside I got a headache and had to take a pill and a nap (45 min plus 15 minutes to fall asleep), but I am not sure I even slept. But I feel fine. I mean I'm sure I can have a decent day, but I don't like the way I feel.

 

I tend to sleep more a few days and then this happens or I tend to sleep less and feel tired over time, and it's weird. I think next time I'll try staying up. Maybe read in my room or something.

 

I did go to bed at midnight (a half complete on my tracker) for two days.

[RhiaWolfe]

2 hours ago, Echoceanic said:

 

Day 2

 

Only half a day is done, but lets do this anyway, cause I have things to say.

 

Today I woke up at... 4:20 am. Fully awake. I had to make a decision if I should get up and feel incredibly sleepy at about 10 am, or go to sleep and wake up at 7 am. I picked the second option since I didn't want to bother the person that needs to get ready for work. And I woke up groggy. So, so so groggy.

 

Upside I did some stuff, and took a nice walk because the weather is finally not scorching. Downside I got a headache and had to take a pill and a nap (45 min plus 15 minutes to fall asleep), but I am not sure I even slept. But I feel fine. I mean I'm sure I can have a decent day, but I don't like the way I feel.

 

I tend to sleep more a few days and then this happens or I tend to sleep less and feel tired over time, and it's weird. I think next time I'll try staying up. Maybe read in my room or something.

 

I did go to bed at midnight (a half complete on my tracker) for two days.

 

I like seeing these successes! You woke up groggy, but your body should (Hopefully) get used to you sleeping when you're supposed to. 

 

Walk is awesome. I took a walk myself today because it was so nice out.  

 

Going to bed at midnight two days is awesome progress! Keep it up! 

 

Let us know how it goes when you try staying up. Sometimes we have to do these trial and error things to figure out what our mind and body wants or needs. I wish it could just tell me. 

[Echoceanic]

1 hour ago, RhiaWolfe said:

Let us know how it goes when you try staying up. Sometimes we have to do these trial and error things to figure out what our mind and body wants or needs. I wish it could just tell me. 

 

Tomorrow I have to get up at like 5 am and earlier cause bus so it's the alarm. But when it happens on it's own again I'll for sure stay up. 

[Echoceanic]

Day 3/some of 2:

 

Yesterday I thought I'd wind up doing nothing but I wound up writing a lot more than I thought I would. I also took another walk and I managed to identify what I could and not do. Didn't drink a lot of water.

 

Today I am operating on 5 hours of sleep, but don't feel that sleepy now with two coffees and three glasses of water. I am not writing today - I can still hit my goal of 7 chapters this week if I skip today. I went to the school and the big deal was 5 minutes. So I had to wait for an hour in a town. I handled it better this time - ate (though the big bagel that is supposed to be a breakfast lasted 2 hours and I wasn't that hungry when I ate it because I had breakfast before that) drank water and then had coffee for an hour in a coffee shop, relaxingly.

 

I also made a Steam account and downloaded Neverwinter because I am too interested in the new expansion and how this PC handles that game.

 

One thing I hate about games - why the hell is patching that big? Like I feel at some point you need to update the original download file come on (though yeah there might be a reason but it still annoys me and by the gods the patching). 

[jonfirestar]

9 minutes ago, Echoceanic said:

 

One thing I hate about games - why the hell is patching that big? Like I feel at some point you need to update the original download file come on (though yeah there might be a reason but it still annoys me and by the gods the patching). 

 

I could tell you if you really want to know  but it wouldn't make it any less infuriating!