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Finally found the time to go to that peak I wanted to visit. It's this place:

Resultado de imagen de peña hueva

It's only 5 minutes by car from where I live.

I have mixed feelings about the hike. The site where I looked how to get up there, said it would take 1h45m, and I wondered how on earth could that be since it is not that high (that's the reason why I kept pushing my hike, because I would need almost 4 hours to do the whole thing). It turned out that the trail to go up there was a two-car wide road (unpaved, that's something) and since it was prepared for cars, the path had this wide zigzagging pattern, and that's when I understood why would it take forever to reach the top. So I said, what the hell I'm not doing this, and instead I followed the pine tress slope that you see on the left of the picture to just go up straight ahead. It took me only 35 minutes, way faster than the suggested road. I was surprised and proud of myself when I saw my legs responding really well to the ascent. They didn't feel like I was doing any effort at all! Now, my lungs, that's a different thing. I ended needing rests to listen to their death threats. Once up there, it was nice, and from up there I could see those beloved hills where I do all my shenanigans.

To go down I decided to follow the road, which showed me some beautiful places, like a fountain surrounded by brumbles where I ate some nice blackberries, but it got boring soon and I decided to go through the pines again. I disliked that the highway was so close it made it a noisy place, so I don't think this is going to be a favourite outing. However, it was nice to explore something new.

 

Aside from this, I followed my regular schedule and did all my tasks. Week zero is about to end and I'm having a very nice feeling of doing a good work. Prove of this is that after breakfast this morning, anxiety was completely gone. It came back a while later, but this is more than what I've got for the last month, so I'm thankful and it helps to know I'm in the good way.

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That place is beautiful!

 

3 hours ago, zenLara said:

So I said, what the hell I'm not doing this, and instead I followed the pine tress slope that you see on the left of the picture to just go up straight ahead.

This is why we are friends.  I love skipping the roads and making my own trails up the mountains

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2 hours ago, WhiteGhost said:

This is why we are friends.  I love skipping the roads and making my own trails up the mountains

Isn't that the best part?

And, also, are you sure we're friends?

Imagen relacionada

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3 hours ago, WhiteGhost said:

I love skipping the roads and making my own trails up the mountains

 

30 minutes ago, zenLara said:

Isn't that the best part?

 

I'd join y'all to make our own trails! That place looks beautiful :)

 

31 minutes ago, zenLara said:

 

Imagen relacionada

 

tumblr_inline_p7v5durhga1snqrh9_540.gif

 

original.gif

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Shame the place didn’t live up to your expectations because it looks beautiful in the pics. :) 

 

Really happy you got a respite from your anxiety though!!!

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11 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

Really happy you got a respite from your anxiety though!!!

It was great. Unfortunately it came back really strong in the afternoon. But this is a change, and change is welcome.

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That's the nature of the beast isn't it? :( But for me those glimpses of "normality" are so important because at least it serves as a reminder that things will get better. Keep fighting!

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Week zero check-in

 

I found it very useful a couple of challenges ago when I measured how much of my week had been used to improve myself in some or other way, so I'm repeating these check-ins.

This is were part of my time went this week:

 

· Breathing 1h 50m (Approx. half of this time is non-breathing time)

· Yoga 4h

· Cold shower 30" + 2' min. -  1' + 4' max.

· Ice twice

· Morning pages 6/7

· Bone broth 7/7

· Veggies 14/21

· 15' decluttering/cleaning 5/7

· Self-defence 2h

· Pull 7/7 Total: 5'30"

· Push 3fp + 7kp

· Sq 30 Extremely boring

· Backbends 23m

· Abs 30m

· Mus 8/7

· Ísk 1h

· Reading 1h 30m

· Walking 6h 30m

· Groceries shopping twice

Total time of deliberate movement: 13h 35m!!!

Total time invested in getting back to a 2018-Wolverine state: approx. 22h


Things I'm happy with: most of them, to be honest. This has been a very nice week, no matter my anxiety levels. I feel proud.

 

Things I'm specially happy with: 

 

- Ice. I've done it only twice, but the sensations afterwards have been amazing. In fact, the other parts of my body where asking why couldn't they have that too. Sure! But later...

- Backbends. I've spent the past months quite obsessed with finally getting my chin to my knees in a forward fold, and I am almost there (some days more than others), and I realised I hadn't thought of going the other direction. Solved. I'm stiff as a piece of wood, but I was it too when I started forward folds (I could only sit straight and with the help of my arms) and look at me now.

- Music. Excellent. I think it's been years since I've enjoyed music practice so much.

- Icelandic. Great. It's definitely a habit, I take at least 5 minutes everyday to review something, and I keep it varied (audio, video, grammar, reading, vocabulary).

 

Things that can get better:

 

- Reading. I think there are more pauses along the day I can use to read.

- Self-defence. I'd like to practice some short moments at home, even if it's mental rehearsal.

- Push. The number of push-ups I did is ridicule, but it's a start.

- No running or animal flow have happened, but it is still early in the challenge. Everything will come back.

 

Things I'm dropping: squats. I thought it would be good to do some to strengthen my legs a bit more, but honestly, I can't stand them.

 

 

 

Action recovery mode is working!

 

Imagen relacionada

 

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21 hours ago, zenLara said:

And, also, are you sure we're friends?

Imagen relacionada

Why of course, we're besties

Image result for Hulk wolverine friends

 

3 hours ago, zenLara said:

This has been a very nice week, no matter my anxiety levels. I feel proud.

You should be, that is a great week.  Absolutely living up to Wolverine status :) 

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19 hours ago, zenLara said:

You're never on my side.

 

Just sharing an experience with you ;)

 

So glad to hear this week has been successful to you :) Keep finding new trails up the hills!

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19 hours ago, WhiteGhost said:

Why of course, we're beasties

Image result for Hulk wolverine friends

FTFY

 

19 hours ago, WhiteGhost said:

Absolutely living up to Wolverine status :) 

Yes!

 

18 hours ago, Ensi said:

Just sharing an experience with you

That's what you say to yourself to feel better because you never have my back? Oooook

tumblr_oxi7cbOBcV1rcn1qfo5_400.gif

 

18 hours ago, Ensi said:

So glad to hear this week has been successful to you

I'm very happy with it. I would like to say "and now I'm super-pumped for week 1!" but truth is anxiety raised up to the top last night and seems it's going to stay with me today. I need to go groceries shopping and I'm so anxious I just can't. But I know that if I don't go, then the whole week is going to go downhill because I won't have enough food at home. I need to understand I'm not anxious about going to the market, but about thinking of going to the market. Brains.

 

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9 minutes ago, zenLara said:

Well, it's done. It was stupidly stressful, but I have a nicely full fridge and pantry now.

Nice! Awesome job on taking action.

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Goals for the week:

 

- reach 2 hours of breathing

- maintain 4 hours of yoga

- ice twice

- 6 minutes pull

- 2 hours of reading

- walk for at least 4 hours

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23 minutes ago, Mad Hatter said:

Nice! Awesome job on taking action.

Thank you. It felt really hard, it's unbelievable how much power this thing has. Back home now, though, with a new bone broth simmering in the kitchen, a nice duck shank waiting in the fridge, and me getting ready for backbends.

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Self-defence day and I'm starting to worry: none of the new guys showed up and I was alone again. Everybody else preferes the MKG class, since they are allowed to play with shiny things like sticks and knives and they wrestle and all that. So I'm worried that if I keep attending these lessons all alone mostly, they will finally discontinue them. I guess they have way more people in the evenings, but is it profitable to have one teacher there for one only person or a couple of them in the mornings?

Anyway, I was there, the guy was there, it had to happen. I had double portion of my push-ups, abs, and lunges because according to him I could totally go for it. Then some work on proper technique for punches and elbows, and then we worked on a sequence that combined both and of course... there we went! He made me repeat that sequence on 3-minute rounds for 20 minutes, against him, full speed and strength, which may be not much for boxing standards but in my case I was dying there. I was happy that he mentioned that some of my punches were real ones, hurting ones, and it is the first time he has said something like that to me. He encouraged me to continue (ehem) with my fist push-ups sets (ha, sets, in plural, lol) and to find 10 minutes every day to work on these drills. Cold shower after that felt better than ever.

 

Not much more to report. I'm doing my tasks, I'm trying to keep myself busy to avoid overthinking, and I got some anxiety peak last night. It was about a meeting I was supposed to attend today, but it has been postponed, probably rescheduled for tomorrow. At the meeting I'm going to meet the guy who will be the other flute teacher this year (the woman that has been here for the past two years has been moved on to another city) and every time I have to face a new colleague I go through all these thoughts about having trouble with the new guy. I know it's just a remembrance of the past (in case some of you don't know, I was involved in a work harassment situation for three years), and that I have had no problems with my co-workers at all since I moved here, but still those bad memories keep coming back every time a new flute teacher comes. It's completely irrational, not only because people at my work place are usually nice and respectful, but because he, like the other ones before him, will be a part-time worker and be there one or two days a week, so I won't probably even see him much or have much interaction with him. Still, anxiety...

To make life a bit more complicated, my boyfriend will be hospitalised for a couple of days at the end of the week, because he needs his gallbladder removed. There's only a bit of "mud" in it, but doctors are worried it may cause the pancreas connection to be blocked and cause serious problems, so... He's a bit anxious, but not much, since his mother is a nurse in that hospital and she has even chosen which doctor will do the surgery, and he will be taken care of very well. Still, it's not nice to know someone is going to make holes on you and take a little part of your body away, so he's a bit worried. Then, since we're not married or anything, I don't get any work leave to be with him at the hospital, so I will have to be coming back and forth from the hospital to home to work, and you all know how much I like to drive in the capital.

 

I want it to be sunday morning. Now.

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Oh I hope all goes well for your boyfriend, even routine / well controlled, it's still pretty invasive .

 

25 minutes ago, zenLara said:

Still, anxiety...

 

Those sort of memories are pretty strong... Hopefully it's a good guy :)

I can see how many sources of anxiety you have to deal with, and yet you are not getting yourself entangled, challenge is going well imo!

 

 

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I agree with @mu, you' have a lot on your plate right now, but you're still going strong...! I'm very proud of you :) And it's totally understandable to be anxious about meeting new people for the reason you mentioned, I'm sure everyone has something similar (certain situations cause them to have feelings they've had in the past). I'm going through something like that right now, but remember that you're capable of handling whatever comes your way, and people are usually nicer than we think they are. Trust your gut feeling, it will help you assess the situation. Wishing all the best to your boyfriend, too!

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Echoing what the others have said, you’re doing great, especially considering the stressors in your life! Fingers crossed your BF’s surgery will go smoothly.

 

As for the self defence classes, yes realistically they will probably cancel unless more students come in, but in the meantime just milk it for what it’s worth! It’s not often that you get to have private lessons for the cost of group classes so it’s an awesome learning opportunity for you. Also great job on your punching skillz.

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Well done on an excellent first week! 

 

On 9/17/2018 at 11:17 AM, zenLara said:

Well, it's done. It was stupidly stressful, but I have a nicely full fridge and pantry now.

 

Yaaaaay! 

 

On 9/17/2018 at 11:55 AM, zenLara said:

Back home now, though, with a new bone broth simmering in the kitchen, a nice duck shank waiting in the fridge

 

Oh my gosh, yes. 

 

I hope all goes well with your boyfriend's surgery. 

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Hope the surgery and recovery all go as smoothly as possible.

 

Also, agree with Hatter that the classes are not likely to continue, but you should definitely make use of them while they last!

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