Severine Wins Without Fighting

[Arkania]

1 minute ago, Tobbe said:

 

I know. That's how most smart watches work. But it's also one thing I love about my Pebble watch - the screen is always on, no matter how I hold it. And still the battery lasts for almost a week!

 

I think this won't work with the Versa

I configured it like I said and (actively) sync it only once a day (ok, not sure how often the screen is on while I am waggling my arm) and it lasts max. 3 days.

With always screen on it would last maybe just 2 hours

 

[Severine]

Was stressed out this morning and took a break from work to go for a walk. Helpful. Yay for good coping mechanisms.

 

@Tobbe's desk decluttering challenge inspired me, so I am adding that to my goals for today. I absolutely love having a nice clear desk (organized desk, organized mind! room to write, room to think) but I have to reset it about once a month because junk does tend to pile up. 

 

Here's the before picture. Wish me luck.

 

[Arkania]

Good luck

 

[Jean]

Luck and resilience!

[Tobbe]

4 hours ago, Severine said:

Here's the before picture. Wish me luck.

 

Love the nixie tube clock 

And, good luck!  

[Severine]

4 hours ago, Arkania said:

Good luck

4 hours ago, Jean said:

Luck and resilience!

1 hour ago, Tobbe said:

And, good luck!  

 

Huge improvement! Not totally clear, as you can see...I have a few sentimental things and supplies I keep on my desk in the right top corner, and of course my teacup is a permanent fixture, and then on the lower right is a textbook for an online course I'm currently taking and the leather zip-folder which functions as my equivalent of a purse.

 

But, definitely a lot more comfortably usable than before. Also, this is a motorized adjustable sitting/standing desk (can you see the little up and down buttons on the right side under the desk, just below my leather case?) and I've noticed I use it in standing mode a lot more when it's tidy. One more reason to keep it clear.

 

 

 

1 hour ago, Tobbe said:

Love the nixie tube clock 

 

Thanks! I absolutely adore it. I think you're the first person who's ever known what it is   

[Tobbe]

 

45 minutes ago, Severine said:

Huge improvement!

 

Definitely! Well done  

 

44 minutes ago, Severine said:

and I've noticed I use it in standing mode a lot more when it's tidy. One more reason to keep it clear.

 

That's great! I love standing up when working  Makes the barrier to take a few extra steps now and then much lower than if you first have to get up out of your comfortable office chair!

[Arkania]

This looks really good now

I was the one who, in the past, couldn't find the desk under all the stuff.

Now it looks like this.

[Tobbe]

Wish I had two computer screens too. That's something I really miss in my "home office"

[Arkania]

At work I even have 3

I love it! Would never want to miss it anymore!

[Tobbe]

Yeah, I used to have two plus the laptop screen. Now it's just the laptop. The positive side is that I'm used to working with just the laptop screen now. So I can work anywhere and feel just like home

[Severine]

Another day above 10,000 steps thanks to an evening walk (about 45 minutes). This is my favourite time of the year to walk outside, especially at night. I love the way the air smells, and it's that perfect level of chilly where you shiver a bit when you first walk outside but once you're moving your body warms up and the air feels pleasantly cool.

 

So far, having my FitBit linked to my doctor's online health portal has been motivating and pushed me to reach my step goal every day. But it's been three days so I'm not organizing a party yet. We'll see how I feel about it after a month or six.

 

It's funny to remember back when I was still farming and I'd hit 10,000 steps by lunchtime easily. Things are pretty different now, to say the least. Less activity, but also a lot fewer injuries. 

 

Food started off pretty well today but I planned my schedule poorly, and I was out between meetings when I got hungry for lunch so I ended up grabbing takeout. It wasn't a binge or anything, just a normal lunch size serving, but the food was very underwhelming and I felt disappointed because I ended up eating not-healthy food and it wasn't even something I wanted. This is a chronic problem of mine...poor planning leading to limited food options leading to not great choices. I really need to figure out a workflow for consistently prepping and bringing snacks with me. Like, if I had just had a banana and a handful of walnuts in the truck, it would've been enough to tide me over until I got home. Bah.

 

Also I didn't really eat a proper dinner...just some chicken and nothing else. But I wasn't particularly hungry and I couldn't be bothered to put anything together. So food was not great today overall.

 

Long work day for me tomorrow, so I'm theoretically going to get to bed at a reasonable hour.

[Tobbe]

7 hours ago, Severine said:

so I ended up grabbing takeout. It wasn't a binge or anything, just a normal lunch size serving, but the food was very underwhelming and I felt disappointed because I ended up eating not-healthy food and it wasn't even something I wanted.

 

I hate that. I mean, sure, takeout/fast food might not be the best option, but if it would at least taste great it could be worth it sometimes. But it almost never does! And it always looks so good on the commercials and on the photos on the menu!

[Severine]

Today started off like crap. I barely slept, and woke up with a throbbing headache. Ate breakfast and went back to bed. By noon I had less than 500 steps, hah. Definitely a slow start. But thanks to a few extra hours rest, a couple acetaminophen, and a nice walk with D and L in the early afternoon, I got my momentum back. Submitted the homework for the accounting course I'm taking, prepped my lesson for class tomorrow,  did a bunch of housework, and went for a nice long walk with L tonight. Five days in a row meeting my 10,000 step goal. Food was decent today - nothing that'd make the front page of a health magazine, but no takeout, and I had fruits and veggies. 

 

Tomorrow going to call the podiatrist who was recommended to me and see if I can get an appointment. I'd love to get to the bottom of this weird muscle soreness. I have a feeling that, even if it's partially stress, there is probably also an issue of bad biomechanics or ill-fitting shoes or something. Can't hurt to go see him, anyway.

 

Classes went really well yesterday, but by the time I finished teaching and ate food and went for a walk I was completely knackered and didn't have the energy to check the forums or anything, so I need to make the rounds on people's threads and catch up.

 

And for no particular reason, here is a picture of my dog being cute today:

[Severine]

I forgot one more thing I wanted to post here: my eating disorder specialist assigned me homework at our last session, and I figured it'd be useful to share it in case it's helpful or thought-provoking for other people.

 

It started because she asked me what I liked about my body and I just kind of sat there silently. When she prompted me, I said I like that I'm strong. She asked me what else and I was basically stumped. So she asked me to think about it during the week and make a list as I thought of things. 

 

It might sound trite, but I've never really thought of my body from a perspective of gratitude or pride or happiness. Even the positive things (I'm strong, I have good endurance) were always minimized or qualified - right, but I'm not as strong as so-and-so, or my endurance isn't good enough to do this other thing, etc. So trying to think of good things totally free of criticism or comparison to other people felt really forced and unnatural. But it was a good exercise, and the more I thought about it the more I realized that I do have things to be happy about. So here's my list:

• I'm quite a bit stronger than average for a woman (and stronger than a decent number of guys I know)
• I have pretty decent endurance especially when I've been regularly active
• I have a really high pain tolerance and I'm really good at tolerating discomfort (this was a huge asset when I was farming)
• I'm decently flexible (this was the aspect of rock climbing I was best at, back when I was doing it regularly)
• Despite a lifetime of disordered eating, periods of poor nutrition and inactivity, and various weight fluctuations, I'm metabolically healthy with no sign of diabetes and no problems with cholesterol, blood pressure, or other health indicators. My body has really stuck by me, despite me not really treating it right. Thanks, body.
• I can touch hot things that burn other people without getting burned (okay, this sounds dumb, but it's useful and D and L are constantly impressed by it)
• I heal well from injuries. The top of one my fingers was nearly torn off by some farm machinery a few years ago and the doctors were doubtful about whether or not it'd be able to reattach and heal properly, but it totally did and now you can't even really tell anything happened. Thanks, cells.
• I can function adequately even when I don't get enough sleep (this is a positive spin on my lifelong struggle with insomnia, lol)
• I have good spatial reasoning and hand-eye coordination
• I am physiologically calm in crisis situations and have fast reflexes in dangerous situations (this literally saved my life once)

Anyway! I know there are no aesthetic things on the list, but that's because it's an honest list. And I'm genuinely okay with the idea of liking my body for what it can do rather than what it looks like, anyway. 

 

It was a genuinely weird feeling to think about my body in a positive, appreciative, non-critical way. And it was kind of nice. I felt a certain kind of...fondness? That I had never before experienced feeling toward my physical self. It made me feel more of a connection with myself, I think, more reason to want to be good to myself and take care of myself. So even though it's cheesy I am glad I did it and I think it's a useful mindset shift to pursue. 

 

So yeah, if you try to think of what you like about your body and nothing immediately comes to mind...I seriously recommend thinking about it and making a list. 

[Tobbe]

3 hours ago, Severine said:

and went for a nice long walk with L tonight. Five days in a row meeting my 10,000 step goal.

 

Nice comeback from a somewhat slow start!

 

3 hours ago, Severine said:

Tomorrow going to call the podiatrist who was recommended to me and see if I can get an appointment.

 

Let us know how it goes  

[Tobbe]

2 hours ago, Severine said:

But it was a good exercise, and the more I thought about it the more I realized that I do have things to be happy about. So here's my list:

 

Thanks for the list. I think I'm going to try to write one down myself. Will probably not be as long as yours (you truly have some awesome capabilities!), but I'm sure I can come up with at least a few things 

[Arkania]

Hey, nice list and thanks for this exercise!

I have some similar abilities (pain tolerance, hot things, heal well). I will think about my own list today. I am excited.

[Severine]

5 hours ago, Tobbe said:

Thanks for the list. I think I'm going to try to write one down myself. Will probably not be as long as yours (you truly have some awesome capabilities!), but I'm sure I can come up with at least a few things 

 

4 hours ago, Arkania said:

Hey, nice list and thanks for this exercise!

I have some similar abilities (pain tolerance, hot things, heal well). I will think about my own list today. I am excited.

 

I would love to see your lists if you feel like sharing! 

[Tobbe]

4 hours ago, Severine said:

I would love to see your lists if you feel like sharing!

 

Of course! As soon as I've written it  

[Severine]

I have a podiatrist appointment on Friday! 

 

 

 

[Tobbe]

Great! Hope they can help you!

[Tobbe]

4 hours ago, Severine said:

I would love to see your lists if you feel like sharing! 

 

 

Linked to my list above 

[Arkania]

I tried, but was really struggeling.

 

 

[Severine]

13 hours ago, Arkania said:

I tried, but was really struggeling

 

It's so much easier to think of bad things than good things. It took me half an hour to write a list of a few good things, but I could rattle off a list of 40-50 bad things off the top of my head. But I think that's why it's good to think about the good. Forces us to see the important stuff that's harder to see.

 

And for what it's worth, you seem strong and healthy and able to amazing stuff. From an outside perspective, it looks like a lot to be proud of!