Wobbegong stays steady

[Wobbegong]

I also have a new mom story yaaaaay

 

During my normal weekend Skype call with the parents they mentioned that they have become cocktail/hors d'oeuvres buddies with the next-door neighbors. To give some context to this development, my parents have been living in that house for 21 years and the neighbors have been there longer, and they have never been on terms better than "raise a hand in greeting if you happen to see each other on the street outside your home." Also, my mother is extremely anti-social and is a huge brat whenever my dad goes out and is social without her, so he often opts to stay home to appease her. 

 

Apparently the neighbors started it by extending an invitation and my parents mysteriously decided to go and it turned out to be fun (shocking). I'm not sure why my mom is so surprised that human interaction can be nice... she was a party girl before she had kids, after all. I guess she forgot. Anyway, she told the neighbors that I'm in Japan, and reported that the wife of the neighbor couple was very happy to me, since she knew I wanted to go to Japan. Then my mom went on to say that neighbor wife was extremely impressed with my mother for having "such a good relationship with her daughters." Mom said the neighbors' daughter no longer speaks to them, and told me in such a way as to make it sound like our being on speaking terms makes our relationship really good. I think neighbor lady just has really low standards. 

 

In a completely unsurprising display of hypocrisy, my mom followed up this neighbor story by saying, "Oh, also I heard from your sister this week, she's still alive." Unbeknownst to our mother, my sister has intentionally gone very low-contact, which our mom usually doesn't notice for months on end until she suddenly remembers my sister exists and sends her a stream of texts demanding confirmation of life (that's literally it, every time) and threatening that she will contact the police if my sister does not respond promptly. Understandably, my sister views this as manipulative and controlling behavior (in the vein of "you exist when I say you exist, and when I say jump you ask how high") so she usually resists the pressure for a few weeks. 

 

Anyway, I just thought it was hilarious and also sad that my mom would humble-brag at me about her great relationship... with me...? And then in the next breath tell me how her minimum requirement for maintaining this great relationship is evidence of life every few months. 

 

For the record, weekly Skype calls was my dad's idea and every week comes down to my dad's effort. My mom usually sleeps through most of the call. #relationshipgoals

[Wobbegong]

I talked to a principal about quitting school lunch today. I think I must have my phrasing wrong, because every time I ask someone if it's ok for me to not receive part or all of a school lunch, they respond "it's not ok, you need carbs to live." :/ I'm gonna eat what I'm gonna eat, bro, I'm only asking if we can not waste food by putting food I'm avoiding on my plate. I'm usually pretty mild-mannered about most things, but I ended up startling him and coming on realllllly strong with my adamance about not eating sugar and starch. He had just softened to the idea when we were interrupted by the school secretary, who said the BoE superintendent was on the line for the principal. 

 

He called to inform the principal that I was opting out of school lunch. 

 

I can't begin to express how shocked I am that anyone from the BoE said anything with any sort of finality, but hopefully when I get to my other three schools the principal will confirm I'm not eating school lunch and that will be the end of it. If not... I'll dig my heels in, I guess. I do understand where they're coming from: Japan does a much better job of teaching portion control, balanced meals, and the concept that snacks and sweets are special occasion only food, not meant for every day consumption, than the US does with its students. Japan also places a really strong emphasis on doing what's best for the group, even if it means making personal sacrifices. So from the principal's perspective, it's part of my job as a teacher to model good eating habits for the students and not to be picky or individualistic.

 

But I had one stroke of phenomenal (sort of) luck: we got the results from our health checks back this week, and my LDL cholesterol is really bad. A few other health markers related to weight and waist circumference are also in the danger zone. So I was able to argue with perfect honesty that I'm not changing my eating habits for the sake of being pretty, but purely for my health. I can't think of anything better to model to the students than that. 

[Tateman]

Damn, that seems so crazy that you have to jump through all that, just to eat what you want to eat.  I'm also not too shocked to hear there are lots of starches and sugars in other things. I see that a lot over here too. It is pretty insane just what you find sugars in.

 

As far as voting goes, yes I did get out there and vote.  Even walked to the polling place to get more steps in on the day.

[Bean Sidhe]

I am glad the that the schools are going to start letting you eat how you want. I do understand their logic in a way, but it is still kinda screwy. Hopefully now that everyone is on board, your doing better.

And for the mom story... Shes confusing. I guess in a way at least checking that your child is alive and your husband calling the other one is a huge step from not talking to them at all. But I can't imagine ever doing that with my kids. I mean I know I won't talk to them every day, but I would hope to talk to them semi-regularly. I dunno. Maybe its just me.

But lets be honest here, your mom has some issues. At least she is making some friends or at least not just sitting in the house?

[Wobbegong]

On 11/12/2018 at 10:05 PM, Bean Sidhe said:

I would hope to talk to them semi-regularly. I dunno. Maybe its just me.

I think it's not just you. I would love to have a mother who is interested in my life and keeps in touch with me regularly, but my own mother is not really capable of that, so I have stopped dreaming that dream. I have older lady coworkers now who mother me far more than I'm comfortable with. (I might have a lower tolerance for it than normal given my upbringing.) 

 

On 11/12/2018 at 10:05 PM, Bean Sidhe said:

But lets be honest here, your mom has some issues. At least she is making some friends or at least not just sitting in the house?

I mean, I do view it as a good thing, but I'm also trying to cut myself off from worrying about her depression, and her making friends and not just sitting around the house doesn't really help me any. I hope she's growing as a person, but I don't hope too much, because I always end up disappointed. 

 

On 11/10/2018 at 3:46 AM, Tateman said:

Damn, that seems so crazy that you have to jump through all that, just to eat what you want to eat.  I'm also not too shocked to hear there are lots of starches and sugars in other things. I see that a lot over here too. It is pretty insane just what you find sugars in.

There's sugar in everything! It's such a pain! People tried to tell me "it's probably just a pinch of sugar in a big pot of soup, you don't have to worry about it" but it definitely tastes sweeter than that, and starchy carbs add up really fast. I say my limit is 20g a day and they say "That's impossible though." But when I ask what they ate when sugar was really expensive (it's only become cheap since the turn of the century, really -- er, the 20th century) they all look so startled and then say "that's right, I guess it's not tradition!" 

 

On 11/12/2018 at 10:05 PM, Bean Sidhe said:

I am glad the that the schools are going to start letting you eat how you want. I do understand their logic in a way, but it is still kinda screwy. Hopefully now that everyone is on board, your doing better.

I had to go to the doctor (story forthcoming) for a follow up and was able to tell my coworkers after that my LDL has gone down 41 points in two months. So now they're all completely on board with me doing my thing over here as long as THEY don't have to give up sugar. (Which is hilarious because a bunch of them have been like "yeah my cholesterol is high too... I guess I should exercise or something...") Good luck with that guys. 

[Bean Sidhe]

On 11/23/2018 at 6:21 AM, Wobbegong said:

I think it's not just you. I would love to have a mother who is interested in my life and keeps in touch with me regularly, but my own mother is not really capable of that, so I have stopped dreaming that dream. I have older lady coworkers now who mother me far more than I'm comfortable with. (I might have a lower tolerance for it than normal given my upbringing.) 

 

I got like that once with my SMIL. I was having a reaction to nuts and she started getting all mom-like. Especially with asking about if I had "poo-poo" yet. Uh, not how I work. But at the same time, I think I am overcompensating sometimes since I do tend to mom everyone around me a bit. when one of my chosen sisters called me mom for a bit, I was not shocked.

 

On 11/23/2018 at 6:21 AM, Wobbegong said:

I mean, I do view it as a good thing, but I'm also trying to cut myself off from worrying about her depression, and her making friends and not just sitting around the house doesn't really help me any. I hope she's growing as a person, but I don't hope too much, because I always end up disappointed. 

 

Its that whole -manage expectations  and you will always hope for good for her no matter what, (she is your mom) but you will also learn to prepare for bad. Maybe that is just me. And I get the trying to not worry about her right now since there really is not anything you can do about it at the moment.

 

On 11/23/2018 at 6:21 AM, Wobbegong said:

I had to go to the doctor (story forthcoming) for a follow up and was able to tell my coworkers after that my LDL has gone down 41 points in two months. So now they're all completely on board with me doing my thing over here as long as THEY don't have to give up sugar. (Which is hilarious because a bunch of them have been like "yeah my cholesterol is high too... I guess I should exercise or something...") Good luck with that guys. 

Hopefully you are okay after the doctor, but now you have proof your doing better overall. Congrats on doing so well.