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Harriet

Harriet's Emergency Stopgap

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3 minutes ago, Grumble said:

 

I'm speaking from personal experience, but yes, it worked for me.

As for Wolverine, You may not be canadian enough.


Well, I'll be Hugh Jackman instead, we're both 'Strayan. He still has the adamantium skeleton, right? That's not just props, right? 

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Just now, Harriet said:


Well, I'll be Hugh Jackman instead, we're both 'Strayan. He still has the adamantium skeleton, right? That's not just props, right? 

Oh Dear GIF - OhDear GIFs
 

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1 minute ago, Grumble said:
Oh Dear GIF - OhDear GIFs
 

 

No, you're right, this is ridiculous. I don't have much in common with wolverine, or Jackman. I am clearly a dwarven warrior, like Dwalin, but with nicer hair. I'm just slightly too tall and with not much beard and a bit too narrow and maybe not vicious enough and I've never killed anyone in battle, and dragons maybe don't exist, but otherwise we're exactly alike and no one can persuade me otherwise. 

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6 minutes ago, Harriet said:

Soo, everyone is saying to make small sustainable changes, which makes sense. But you also say eating at maintenance will change nothing. So does that mean I should indeed cycle between trying to lose fat and trying to get stronger/more muscular (but with small habit changes) instead of sitting at maintenance?

I would think it depends on what you consider "one cycle."

 

I really haven't gone through the whole cut, bulk, cut, bulk process yet. My general plan...eat enough to get stronger, if I get fat, take a break. 

 

I do know that my default timeline wants to be days and weeks...when I really need to be thinking months and years

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23 minutes ago, farflight said:

But you also say eating at maintenance will change nothing. So does that mean I should indeed cycle between trying to lose fat and trying to get stronger/more muscular (but with small habit changes) instead of sitting at maintenance?

I agree with @farflight insofar as doing a bulk/cut cycle is unneccessary. You also can't say, ok, I'm fat I need to cut. Or I'm skinny, I need to eat more. (although if you're skinny and lifting, you probably need to eat more anyway) You may discover that your maintenance with your increased lifting is your cutting calories. 

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After seeing the Wolverine Dwalin conversation, may I offer a different way to look at the issue?

 

Mark Twight once said "Appearance is a consequence of fitness." This is the guy who trained the actors for 300. Steve has quoted him more than once in articles and blog posts. Let your fitness be about what you want to do, rather than how you look. Let your eating be to fuel those goals, rather than about your appearance. If I gave you a magic wand that let you wave it once and forever look the way you want you can use it to change the way you look, but it won't necessarily change the way you feel. You might like the way you look more than you used to, but it won't help you like yourself better. 

 

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3 hours ago, farflight said:

I really haven't gone through the whole cut, bulk, cut, bulk process yet. My general plan...eat enough to get stronger, if I get fat, take a break. 

 

But it sounds like you eat a bit more for a while, then a bit less... is that not bulking and cutting? Or have I misunderstood? 

 

2 hours ago, Grumble said:

 You also can't say, ok, I'm fat I need to cut. Or I'm skinny, I need to eat more. (although if you're skinny and lifting, you probably need to eat more anyway) You may discover that your maintenance with your increased lifting is your cutting calories. 


I can't? Now I am totally confused. So, when I say maintenance, I mean whatever level of calories causes me to neither lose nor gain weight. Is this what you'd do, even if you wanted to be leaner AND stronger? 

 

2 minutes ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

Let your fitness be about what you want to do, rather than how you look. Let your eating be to fuel those goals, rather than about your appearance.


I mean, I do dream of being stronger. But I can't quite let go of the idea of being leaner, too. And I don't think the one causes the other, since there are many very strong lifters who are less lean than I am. I guess I could ignore my appearance for a while and focus on strength. But I find it distressing. 

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Just now, Harriet said:

But it sounds like you eat a bit more for a while, then a bit less... is that not bulking and cutting? Or have I misunderstood? 

I don't think misunderstood, I probably didn't go into enough detail. When I consider a bulk/cut, to me that means I'm doing something with a clear goal and protocol I'm going to follow (e.g. I'm gonna cut XYZ calories to drop YZX lbs by a certain point). I was just getting to the point where I was considering increasing my calories and start tracking (I religiously track all my foods so I know roughly how much I'm supposed to be eating for different goals)

 

3 minutes ago, Harriet said:

I mean, I do dream of being stronger. But I can't quite let go of the idea of being leaner, too. And I don't think the one causes the other, since there are many very strong lifters who are less lean than I am. I guess I could ignore my appearance for a while and focus on strength. But I find it distressing.

I try not to compare myself to other lifters. I don't know their story, their diet, their lifting regiment. I can use them maybe as a visualization of goal and pick up their habits, but I'll never be them, no matter what, even if I did all the things they do...I'd still not be them. I originally started strength training because I was not able to cut out any more calories and I still had a "goal weight" I wanted to hit on the scale. As I lifted, I got stronger, and I didn't increase my calories that much. I was zapped at the end of days. I had nothing left. So I started eating a bit more. I felt better. I've since let go of that goal weight number on the scale. One big plus I was finally able to do (again, after 4-6 years of slowly...slowly..........very slowly dropping weight) I was able to offer my dad pants that were too big for me (I'd been the biggest in the family for 2 decades). I've maintained 38 inch waist for about a year now...and I've been eating more (sometimes a lot more), but I'm eating to fuel my activity...caring a bit less about the scale, if my pants get tights, I'll know I'm putting on too much fat. It took me 30 years to get to 320+ lbs. Thankfully, its only taken about 4-5 to get close to 200 lbs (I did hit 198.6 1.5 years ago). 

 

11 minutes ago, Harriet said:

But I can't quite let go of the idea of being leaner, too. And I don't think the one causes the other, since there are many very strong lifters who are less lean than I am. I guess I could ignore my appearance for a while and focus on strength. But I find it distressing. 

 

Getting stronger will get you leaner...Muscle is more dense than fat. I'm sure someone around these boards has more knowledge on the science/ratios there than I ever will. Suffice it to say, While I'm not hitting the gym, I'm still getting stronger...sometimes, in the right lighting, I think my love handles/spare tire/muffin top/fat roll is getting smaller. I try not to let it bug me too much. I'm getting stronger, I can hike, I can walk, for f@#ks sake, I can run (nothing like @Grumble)! But I can run...a couple miles in a row...without anything chasing me!

 

If it were me, since I was there a bit ago, I'd focus on the lifting and exercise in general for now. To diet you've described doesn't sound awful. Side note: look up some body fat % pictures to get a clearer picture of what different %s look like. When I started, I dreamed of 6 pack abs. After some research, I think 6 packs show up a little around/below 10% body fat. I might shoot for that, once, just to say I got there...but I know I like food too much to stay there. I'd rather be stronger and a little fluffy that ripped and lusting after a piece of pizza (which reminds me, I do eat pizza every now and then...and donuts :D). 

 

I hope those ramblings made some semblance of sense

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30 minutes ago, Harriet said:

I can't? Now I am totally confused.

Welcome to nutrition conversations.

 

31 minutes ago, Harriet said:

I can't? Now I am totally confused. So, when I say maintenance, I mean whatever level of calories causes me to neither lose nor gain weight. Is this what you'd do, even if you wanted to be leaner AND stronger? 

So you're maintenance calories are whatever level they are to maintain the weight you want? Sounds like you could be bulking or cutting or staying static. The grand scope of what I'm trying to get at (in a round about poorly explained way now that I reread my ramblings) is that the concepts are not so set in stone that you have to bulk cycle or cut cycle. You decide what is best for you based on your goals and let them change as your needs change.

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1 hour ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

After seeing the Wolverine Dwalin conversation, may I offer a different way to look at the issue?

 

Mark Twight once said "Appearance is a consequence of fitness." This is the guy who trained the actors for 300. Steve has quoted him more than once in articles and blog posts. Let your fitness be about what you want to do, rather than how you look. Let your eating be to fuel those goals, rather than about your appearance. If I gave you a magic wand that let you wave it once and forever look the way you want you can use it to change the way you look, but it won't necessarily change the way you feel. You might like the way you look more than you used to, but it won't help you like yourself better. 

 

i agree with tank here, losing weight/looking "lean" or "traditionally fit" isn't going to change the way you think about yourself. i look back at pictures of myself at my leanest and can't believe i thought i was "too fat" at that time. do what feels good for you, your body, your mental health, and your happiness!

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1 hour ago, farflight said:

Getting stronger will get you leaner...Muscle is more dense than fat. I'm sure someone around these boards has more knowledge on the science/ratios there than I ever will. Suffice it to say, While I'm not hitting the gym, I'm still getting stronger...sometimes, in the right lighting, I think my love handles/spare tire/muffin top/fat roll is getting smaller. I try not to let it bug me too much. I'm getting stronger, I can hike, I can walk, for f@#ks sake, I can run (nothing like @Grumble)! But I can run...a couple miles in a row...without anything chasing me!

 

If it were me, since I was there a bit ago, I'd focus on the lifting and exercise in general for now. To diet you've described doesn't sound awful. Side note: look up some body fat % pictures to get a clearer picture of what different %s look like. When I started, I dreamed of 6 pack abs. After some research, I think 6 packs show up a little around/below 10% body fat. I might shoot for that, once, just to say I got there...but I know I like food too much to stay there. I'd rather be stronger and a little fluffy that ripped and lusting after a piece of pizza (which reminds me, I do eat pizza every now and then...and donuts :D). 

 

I hope those ramblings made some semblance of sense

 

Thanks for sharing, and good work on getting down to 200-ish. It sounds like you've been focusing on strength and incidentally dropping fat in a slow, non-obsessing way that doesn't involve being hungry or tired, is that right? Sigh. I may in fact have to just focus on strength and be patient, because apparently even three days of trying to cut calories makes me completely obsessed with food. 

 

I have spent so much time looking at the bodyfat % pictures, but they're all inconsistent. One chart's 25 looks like another's 30. Anyway, I look to be about 25 (according to this charming picture and my stupid electronic scale) and would like to be closer to 20.

 

536711479_bodyfatillustrated.jpg.35a12874da3faa230b8d0a171fedf970.jpg

 

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1 hour ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

If I gave you a magic wand that let you wave it once and forever look the way you want you can use it to change the way you look, but it won't necessarily change the way you feel. You might like the way you look more than you used to, but it won't help you like yourself better. 

 

1 hour ago, Harriet said:

But I can't quite let go of the idea of being leaner, too.

 

I guess I could ignore my appearance for a while and focus on strength. But I find it distressing. 

 

I realize I'm just jumping back in the pool, that's a nasty illness for you! But I think these guys raise some interesting ideas. Not so much the - I want to be leaner, so much as the - why do I want to be leaner, to the point where it is distressing? What's distressing about it? What are your beliefs surrounding leanness? What will being lean mean? What is lean enough? 

 

I don't ask any of this looking for specific public answers, but more so that that kind of personal conversation can help shed light on priorities.

 

4 hours ago, Grumble said:

But you also say eating at maintenance will change nothing. So does that mean I should indeed cycle between trying to lose fat and trying to get stronger/more muscular (but with small habit changes) instead of sitting at maintenance?

 

Except that you're lifting. That's a big change from not lifting! If you're fueled well enough to lift heavy and recover well enough to lift heavy once again, changes in the body happen over time. If your goals are to become a body builder (or change your body shape in a way that fights your genetics), understand that it requires a tremendous amount of careful, calculated nutrition and intensive training. If your goals are to become stronger and leaner while continuing to live your life, understand that it takes time, patience, and simple consistency.

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26 minutes ago, CourtnieMarie said:

i agree with tank here, losing weight/looking "lean" or "traditionally fit" isn't going to change the way you think about yourself. i look back at pictures of myself at my leanest and can't believe i thought i was "too fat" at that time. do what feels good for you, your body, your mental health, and your happiness!

 

How did you change your mind, if I may ask? 

 

3 minutes ago, RedStone said:

I realize I'm just jumping back in the pool, that's a nasty illness for you! But I think these guys raise some interesting ideas. Not so much the - I want to be leaner, so much as the - why do I want to be leaner, to the point where it is distressing? What's distressing about it? What are your beliefs surrounding leanness? What will being lean mean? What is lean enough? 

 

Eh, I don't want to talk too much about how ugly I feel. But I was kind of hoping I would fit into normal clothes and like how I look, as I did when I was younger and thinner. 

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1 minute ago, Harriet said:

I have spent so much time looking at the bodyfat % pictures, but they're all inconsistent. One chart's 25 looks like another's 30. Anyway, I look to be about 25 (according to this charming picture and my stupid electronic scale) and would like to be closer to 20.

 

536711479_bodyfatillustrated.jpg.35a12874da3faa230b8d0a171fedf970.jpg

 

 

LOL I was posting right when you were! 

 

Yeah... the charts are just illustrations. Fact is it looks different on everyone anyway. If you want to go by BF%, you'll have to get measured, but even those methods have percentages of error. 

 

My personal experiences are that I was never happy with my size, no matter how lean I was, and I was very lean. Honestly, I'm much happier now that I no longer obsess over it - than I ever EVER was at my "ideal" size. All I ever saw was - not good enough, not lean enough, more work to be done. One day I decided to stop not being good enough. I'm good enough. And I like to work on being stronger and faster and more comfortable in my joints. These are my truths now.

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32 minutes ago, Harriet said:

It sounds like you've been focusing on strength and incidentally dropping fat in a slow, non-obsessing way that doesn't involve being hungry or tired, is that right?

....uhmmmm....yea...I haven't been obsessing about it....no...nope, not me...not at all............

 

No, I tracked my calories fairly obsessively (It helps that I'm HUGELY driven by routine and doing the same things over and over and over....and over!). To put in perspective...I've got a myfitnesspal tracking streak of 1508 days...I actually called fitnesspal when I got a break early in my tracking (maybe 2 months in...went out of town and input everything in when I got back, but they would add the days, still a little more upset about that than I probably should be).

 

The thing that I did, when I started trying to drop weight through food tracking (lost just through diet for about 1.5-2 years) was I set an easy goal. I set the program to lose 0.5 lbs a week. I figured at that slow speed, sometimes it wouldn't even feel like weight loss...and it didn't. Granted, that put me on the long....long...long road to hitting goal weights, but it allowed me to eat like a human, and gave me the time to build in the habits that I really need to make this a life long process. I still pig out sometimes. I just don't do too many pig outs in a row (FYI, at an entire slab of ribs last friday...actually got a buzz from it)...I still have nights when I might eat an entire pizza...not its just a small or medium, and it doesn't happen that often. 

 

In regards to the bf% charts, I was meaning more like these:

xbody-fat-chart-men.png.pagespeed.ic.3ex

 

From the reading i've done, there really isn't a "great" way to measure body fat percentages. The best that I'd read about involves determining buoyancy and other factors (i.e. expensive and not really necessary unless you're a top athlete). I'm probably in the 19-24% ranges. The odd thing is, now maybe its my age starting to show, as I've gotten stronger, I've gotten more confident and taken my shirt off at the beach (which I'm the kid that has childhood pics of being on the beach in a t-shirt due to stretch marks and being very overweight). 

 

Take it slow, be patient, its a loooooong road. You'll get there...we all will get there!

so_say_we_all1.gif

(sorry, been catching up on BSG since the summer, almost done)

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1508 days is incredible! I've started trying out my fitness pal and it has so many types of food on it, it's pretty easy to use apart from restaurant food. 

I guess I could commit to going really slowly as long as I felt there would be some progress. The equivalent slow loss for me would have to be less than 0.5 per week because I probably have a smaller total requirement than you, so 500 is a bigger proportion of my total. Maybe I'll just trying tracking for a while to get out of the crazy hungry mindset and see what my intuitive eating adds up to. Then I could make small, small changes (which are much harder to do consistently without tracking, I think, because we delude ourselves a bit).

I found the women's version and I don't look like any of them. :/ 

 

97168845_legionbodyfat.thumb.png.f6bfc2abace76f5f2a343a106ac39062.png

 

As the AOA I feel I must speculate on the meaning of BSG. It could be "Beserkers' Space Guinea-Pigs" "Buttery, Spoonless Grip" or "Behold! Sliced Gibbons!"

 

Or, thinking on it a little more carefully, it could be another space show. Perhaps to be added to list of things to find and watch, like stargate and new doctor who. And all the marvel movies. All of them. Even the terrible ones. 

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4 hours ago, RedStone said:

My personal experiences are that I was never happy with my size, no matter how lean I was, and I was very lean. Honestly, I'm much happier now that I no longer obsess over it - than I ever EVER was at my "ideal" size. All I ever saw was - not good enough, not lean enough, more work to be done. One day I decided to stop not being good enough. I'm good enough. And I like to work on being stronger and faster and more comfortable in my joints. These are my truths now.


You just decided? But Howwwww? 

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12 minutes ago, Harriet said:

You just decided? But Howwwww? 

 

It wasn't like a switch or anything that just turned off one day... I was reading a lot about thought management and listening to all sorts of podcasts about confidence, I was just so tired of being unhappy with myself! I'll link a few that I love below :)

 

One concept that really brought things home for me is the idea that our emotions are responses to thoughts that we have. That it was up to me to stop believing the thing that made me hate on myself so hard, that I could write a new story, have different thoughts. That the thoughts I had were not facts. I had to ask myself a lot of tough and uncomfortable questions and figure out why I thought certain things, where the ideas came from originally, how I could rewrite the story. I journaled a lot, ran a lot of models* looking at the emotions I had and what beliefs I needed to have to get the emotion I wanted instead. Honestly, I just wanted some damn peace lol :lol: 

 

 

So I definitely spent a LOT of time with Brooke Castillo's podcast, and I go through periods where I run through her exercises* for myself on the regular. (When I talk about running coaching models on my challenges, it's this) It was the beginning of the path I needed. Here's a good episode explaining that idea and a video that explains the basics of the exercise a little more clearly (I have a book on it. It's proved itself effective for me.)

 

I'm also into this speaker, a fellow nerd recommended me to her and I like her balls to the walls approach and her work is pretty sound, but more specific to relationships with food than general stuff like the lady above. I dunno if that helps at all, that's just the way it went for me! Once I started reading/listening to this stuff it all kinda snowballed :monkey:

 

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1 hour ago, RedStone said:

So I definitely spent a LOT of time with Brooke Castillo's podcast, and I go through periods where I run through her exercises* for myself on the regular. (When I talk about running coaching models on my challenges, it's this) It was the beginning of the path I needed. Here's a good episode explaining that idea and a video that explains the basics of the exercise a little more clearly (I have a book on it. It's proved itself effective for me.)

 

I'm also into this speaker, a fellow nerd recommended me to her and I like her balls to the walls approach and her work is pretty sound, but more specific to relationships with food than general stuff like the lady above. I dunno if that helps at all, that's just the way it went for me! Once I started reading/listening to this stuff it all kinda snowballed :monkey:

 


Castillo's model sounds a lot like CBT, and the classic manual  "feeling good" by Dr Burns. I've used CBT for other negative thoughts but I haven't done it actively for many, many years and it just never occurred to me to use it to make being thin feel less urgent. While I'm at it, maybe I can use it to get over my fear and hatred of cycling, too. I'm going to read some of Montalvo's confidence project blog tonight. Thank you for the resources <3

 

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9 hours ago, Harriet said:


Castillo's model sounds a lot like CBT, and the classic manual  "feeling good" by Dr Burns. I've used CBT for other negative thoughts but I haven't done it actively for many, many years and it just never occurred to me to use it to make being thin feel less urgent. While I'm at it, maybe I can use it to get over my fear and hatred of cycling, too. I'm going to read some of Montalvo's confidence project blog tonight. Thank you for the resources <3

 

 

100% CBT! (She comes from a psyche background - I think the story is she thought she wanted to be a therapist but decided that coaching was more future oriented.) I've def studied the base for her model, I think it's thought/feeling/result (?) Effective in a pinch but I like the extra lines for all sorts of reasons. Christina is great, I worked with her on a few programs, very charged speaker LOL she's all about that stream of consciousness!

 

Ugh can we talk about cycle? (Is this the kind of cycling you mean?) I took my friends spin class the other day and all my nethers hurt SO MUCH. But I'm a super weak cyclist so it's probably a good thing for me to do more often...

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6 minutes ago, RedStone said:

Ugh can we talk about cycle? (Is this the kind of cycling you mean?) I took my friends spin class the other day and all my nethers hurt SO MUCH. But I'm a super weak cyclist so it's probably a good thing for me to do more often...

 

We can talk about cycling. In fact, I'm going to rant about cycling because it has been trying me lately. I just moved to America without a car. I'm currently walking to the gym and shops, which nets me six plus hours of walking per week. I'm trying to learn to cycle because I'd be able to go places, and Mr Harriet loves cycling. But I hate it. It scares me. It hurts my knees and I feel like I'm using sheer intensity of will (and knees) to get up hills, not muscles. It's exhausting. This could be because the seat is too low. But I can't make it any higher because 1: I already have trouble getting on and off and 2: I have trouble with balance. I have to concentrate constantly so I don't fall off (but I always feel like I'm going to fall off, so it's no fun). By the way, the roads here are extremely bumpy, which is fine for cars. But some places they've painted the road marking over each other so many times they're an inch higher than the surrounding road. Ironically, the worst spot is where they've painted a bicycle icon to show that the street is bike-friendly. I hate going over these bumps and getting my, um, seat beaten. And no, I can't stand up because I emphatically lack the balance*. I find intersections difficult because I can't look around easily when I'm moving (because of poor balance) and I have trouble stopping and starting smoothly because I'm uncoordinated. To top it off, the bike is an unwieldy beast that seems determined to fall over, roll away, or hit me in the shins whenever I try to move it/unlock it/lock it. And finally, everyone else locks their bikes in about 3 seconds while I struggle awkwardly for 30 seconds, sighing because I hate it and wouldn't mind if someone stole it anyway. I should probably practice just in case I get better at it and have a good transport option. But I might need to do some mental work on it because I currently hate it so much that I start feeling unhappy before I even get on the bike. 

Anyway, that was my rant. Tell me about spin class. From what I've seen it sounds like everyone gets on stationary bicycles in the gym to cycle vigorously together? I guess a class could be useful because stationary bikes are an exceedingly dull form of exertion. I guess another benefit is you don't need special shoes or sturdy ankles. Could you maybe do HIIT sprints on it? Is there an instructor who gives you creative reasons to cycle faster, like zombie run? "Cycle like you're bringing reinforcements for the battle of Helm's Deep! Faster, or the humans will despair and die!" or "Don't stop cycling! Velociraptors can sprint at 40 miles per hour, and they want to eat your delicious, well-formed quads!"

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10 minutes ago, Harriet said:

We can talk about cycling. In fact, I'm going to rant about cycling because it has been trying me lately. I just moved to America without a car. I'm currently walking to the gym and shops, which nets me six plus hours of walking per week. I'm trying to learn to cycle because I'd be able to go places, and Mr Harriet loves cycling. But I hate it. It scares me. It hurts my knees and I feel like I'm using sheer intensity of will (and knees) to get up hills, not muscles. It's exhausting. This could be because the seat is too low. But I can't make it any higher because 1: I already have trouble getting on and off and 2: I have trouble with balance. I have to concentrate constantly so I don't fall off (but I always feel like I'm going to fall off, so it's no fun). By the way, the roads here are extremely bumpy, which is fine for cars. But some places they've painted the road marking over each other so many times they're an inch higher than the surrounding road. Ironically, the worst spot is where they've painted a bicycle icon to show that the street is bike-friendly. I hate going over these bumps and getting my, um, seat beaten. And no, I can't stand up because I emphatically lack the balance*. I find intersections difficult because I can't look around easily when I'm moving (because of poor balance) and I have trouble stopping and starting smoothly because I'm uncoordinated. To top it off, the bike is an unwieldy beast that seems determined to fall over, roll away, or hit me in the shins whenever I try to move it/unlock it/lock it. And finally, everyone else locks their bikes in about 3 seconds while I struggle awkwardly for 30 seconds, sighing because I hate it and wouldn't mind if someone stole it anyway. I should probably practice just in case I get better at it and have a good transport option. But I might need to do some mental work on it because I currently hate it so much that I start feeling unhappy before I even get on the bike.

 

I recently got into biking. I know something that I should do is go get my bike fitted/sized. I also get a little back pain on longer rides.

 

Good for you that you're braving the roads, I try to avoid roads...memphis drivers are terrible when you're in a vehicle, I don't want to tempt them with too much biking on roads.

 

I truly enjoy biking off of roads (i.e. biking in a park/paved/graveled trails...I haven't made it to fully off road yet). Is your bike geared? I know hills can suck and I'm still learning what gears to what, how long can I stick in a gear, shifting gears etc.

 

Keep at it. Maybe try biking in a more fun space, practice makes better, my balance has been improving the more I hit the roads/paths...also parks are a lot more fun

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8 minutes ago, farflight said:

 

I recently got into biking. I know something that I should do is go get my bike fitted/sized. I also get a little back pain on longer rides.

 

Good for you that you're braving the roads, I try to avoid roads...memphis drivers are terrible when you're in a vehicle, I don't want to tempt them with too much biking on roads.

 

I truly enjoy biking off of roads (i.e. biking in a park/paved/graveled trails...I haven't made it to fully off road yet). Is your bike geared? I know hills can suck and I'm still learning what gears to what, how long can I stick in a gear, shifting gears etc.

 

Keep at it. Maybe try biking in a more fun space, practice makes better, my balance has been improving the more I hit the roads/paths...also parks are a lot more fun

 

Yeah, I have gears. I'm just unfit and the bike size/mechanics force me to use my knees instead of my quads. A bit of fun, safe biking on paths might be exactly the ticket. I could do it on my non-gym days because my fatigue and anti-motivation seems to have lifted sufficiently that I get a bit restive when there's no gym. I'm going to go look up paths in my area :)
 

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18 hours ago, Harriet said:

How did you change your mind, if I may ask? 

 

you've got so many great responses to go through from fellow nerds, i'll try to keep mine brief. i grew up fat and found out (like most people) at a very early age that this was the worst thing you could be. fluctuated, up and down until there was "too much up." i can now look back at that "up" time and realize i was focusing on way more important things in my life than the amount of calories in 10 almonds. anyway i became obsessive but didn't really know i was obsessive because being obsessed with losing weight is something that's mostly praised in current society. I lost a bunch of weight, kept it off for years but couldn't lose any more. it became depressing. this went on for more than a year. i realized this was probably not a good way to live. i stopped following fitspo on social media and read some books on diet culture. i deleted myfitnesspal on my wedding day a couple months ago so i've only just started the journey towards body acceptance. that's MY story though and part of why i usually let others respond to weight loss/fat loss/diet questions on here :) 

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Wow! So many conversations on your thread, it's awesome! :)

There's a few things I want to say after reading all this:

 

1. WOW! You eat clean! I'm in awe and wish I could eat so little sugar. Let's take a minute to appreciate how well you're fueling your body compared to most. I'm sure you'll continue to see improvements in your overall health and well-being!

 

2. Being in the US without a car must be hard! But biking in places that are not properly set up for it is nightmarish (and potentially dangerous!)

My husband cycles everywhere, but he's Dutch, so his level of confidence, control and his musculature are all top level! I, on the other hand, am a scaredy-cat, have no cycling muscles, and no control. After a few horrible experiences, I now refuse to cycle unless I'm in NL or on a very, very quiet road. I totally understand where you're coming from!

It might sounds ludicrous, but why not look for cycling lessons?

I'm planning on taking some as well, I think there's a real skill in cycling. I'm amazed when I see how much control Dutch people have! Cycling lessons aren't a common thing but it's 2018, it's got to exist, right? ^_^

Also, it sounds like your bike is too heavy! If you can afford it, maybe look into getting a light road bike. It doesn't replace musculature but it can make your life a lot easier, and there'll be way less shin attacks (only major downside is that they're pricey).

Note on spinning: my father-in-law is a cycling fanatic, and he regularly takes spinning classes when he can't fit in outdoor cycling, so I can confirm that it's a great tool for building those muscles :)

Note on locks: I don't know who these people you mention are, but everyone I know who has a bike takes their time locking it! No one wants to come back to a bike missing a wheel, or no bike at all!

 

3. I can't help with the whole bulking-cutting conversation, but like some others, I do recognise myself and my body image issues in the things you write.

Obviously, you know yourself best! In my personal experience, I had to (still have to) simply stay away from appearance-related goals. They never came from a positive place and only worked as an excuse to bully myself. Maybe you can set yourself a challenge to have only non-appearance related fitness goals?

What do you think?

 

Sorry I wrote so much!

All I want to say is that you are fantastic! You are implementing all these positive changes into your life, and this will definitely bring you further and further away from the nasty body image issues. It's a long journey for sure, but there's a great saying, "when it gets better, it gets better" ^_^

In other words, you don't have to wait for things to be perfect before enjoying them, every little step makes life a little easier and a little nicer :)

 

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