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Did my morning meditation with my group and it flushed my whole system so nicely, I feel much better again :) 

Have I mentioned how grateful I am for my clients? They are the best! Getting up before 6am every day, so that we can sit and meditate together through a meeting service. Some of them have been with me for nearly 3 years now. The minute I sit down and tune in to guide them into the meditation, I feel such peace and warmth. All the memory how life loves us comes back. I marvel how each day is new, has never ever happened before yet, so what do I want to make of it? How do I want to greet this brand new day? And what if I could be as new as the day myself :) In a way we always are anyway, aren't we?
It's funny, during meditation time I couldn't care less about what my body looks like - kind of easy when eyes are closed :P but I feel so at home in it and feel so much love for it! I can feel all the life within buzzing about like a million sparkles of light. Way more intelligent than I could ever be from my rational mind and so fluently working together. It's like magic


So now I'll be off to the gym and watch the magic in action :) Let's see how I feel about the mirror this morning and if I even notice it. Hubby is not well this morning, so I will have to go by myself, which is sad. But I'll go anyway to keep the family honor up :D Sending him vitality home and on into his long work day today. Hope he gets better soon.


Oh, and this afternoon I have another adventure waiting: cutting up a deer calf!! Hubby is friends with a hunter and they reserved a whole calf for us this winter, last year we got half a one. It would normally come pretty much unprepared, with bones and rips and things all attached and I am so utterly useless at taking meat apart! But fortunately we are friends with the hunter's wife again and she helped me big time with all the preparing and portioning for freezing last year and promised to do so again. She is a star! I made up for it by treating her with some cranio sacral therapy sessions, which she enjoyed very much, so that too, we'll do again. I wonder how much she will let me do myself today.... last year, I cut maybe three slices of a chunk before she took the knife from my hands and said "Let me do that rather" :lol: 
Wish me strength!


But the meat is fantastic of course and all the family is looking forward to the meals made with it.

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Level 18 Wood-Elf Assassin

 

battle log: counting the good things

current challenge: something, nothing, all the things

previous challenges: 25242322212019181716, 151413121110987654, 321

 

How cool is it that the same God who created mountains and oceans and galaxies looked at you and thought the world needed one of you, too

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15 hours ago, annyshay said:

So many awesome things going on in your thread and in your life. I love the curiosity sparkling through. *hugs*

 

Thanks ^_^ Curiosity is one of my favorite things!! 

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Level 18 Wood-Elf Assassin

 

battle log: counting the good things

current challenge: something, nothing, all the things

previous challenges: 25242322212019181716, 151413121110987654, 321

 

How cool is it that the same God who created mountains and oceans and galaxies looked at you and thought the world needed one of you, too

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Week 2 Day 1

 

First workout in BHAM :triumphant:

 

Set the rowing machine to 6 out of 10 and rowed my 2km in nearly 10 min straight

 

Then I went to my circuit training and the first round was really tough to start with, could feel how it was the third training session within six days and will definitely take some rest between this and the next session on Thursday. Pole might have to wait a bitty... just a bitty though ^_^

 

I'll list the differences between first, second and third round with each exercise for easier overview here, just know it was done as a circuit, meaning I went straight from kettlebell to tire and so on and then repeated the whole thing:

 

1) kettlebell swings 18lbs two-handed for 20 sec and then switching hands for each swing for the other 20 sec
Tried out if that one handed version was better then the 40 sec straight through, but my hands were a bit sweaty and that made the constant switching a bit risky for dropping. 

In the second round I went back to two-handed only, picking the next bigger kettlebell at 12 kg. That was quite hard.

In the third round I went for two-handed swings on the 18lbs again to end it with more ease

 

2) hopping step ups on tire

 

3) body weight rows on sling trainer. The sling trainer has these loops to hold onto, that are attached with some straps to the ceiling. Straight under it there is a line where the floor mats meet and the mats are about a meter wide. So far I had placed my feet a little behind the line to the adjourning mat, so a bit over a meter away from where the straps would hang and then lean back until the straps are straight and do 12 reps of rows.

This time I went with my feet on the middle of the line between the mats and the difference was quite tangible. My goal is to work closer and closer until I can do the rows from straight under the straps. 

Did 12 reps in each round

 

4) Lunges with the Bulgarian Bag on my shoulders (10 kg) for 40 sec, I come to about 8 reps on each side 

 

5) Got to use the T-Bar (anchored on floor with one end, the other can be moved in all directions)  instead of the punching bag and it was much more fun somehow. I don't know what the bar itself weighs, it's pretty heavy as is, so I only added 5kg and then lifted it over my head, down to the left until hip height, up over head, down to the right and so on. Felt very badass ;) 

6) Pushing the power sledge. Didn't add any weight, but rather went for all three rounds at a light jogging pace, which always works well while I do it but has my heart beating like mad afterwards

 

7) Swinging the big ropes. This is getting easier and easier and I am beginning to enjoy it a lot. The movement of the ropes in their waves is beautiful! Played a bit with alternating left and right and then again swinging both at the same time. Fun

 

8) Gravity trainer. No changes, 11 reps of push ups at medium height

 

9) Knee tucks while hanging from pull up bar. I thought of upping this a bit and pulled the knees up then straightened the legs to lower straight. Boy, I struggled!! Managed 5 and then did normal knee tucks for the other 5. Second round the same. In the third round I rested my toes on the step up box under the pull up bar in between, not standing entirely but taking a bit of weight of my hands and with that I managed 10 reps of knee tuck up and straight legs down. This should be good prep for many pole moves!!

 

10) swung the Bulgarian bag 3x around my shoulders clockwise and then counter-clockwise and wow, I feel my pelvic floor needs work for this one :blink: not just a good one for shoulder mobility it seems.

 

After the three circuit rounds I stretched the shoulders and trained some more headstand against the wall, which went better again. Core control is still weak but sloooooooowly coming back. Feels good :) 

 

Stretched into bridge over a gym ball as I struggle to get into bridge from the floor just yet and this way I can push into it so easy :) 

Some more stretches and that's it

 

All in all a great training again, I am very happy with it.

 

  • Like 3

Level 18 Wood-Elf Assassin

 

battle log: counting the good things

current challenge: something, nothing, all the things

previous challenges: 25242322212019181716, 151413121110987654, 321

 

How cool is it that the same God who created mountains and oceans and galaxies looked at you and thought the world needed one of you, too

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Took my dad to the eye doctor this morning for the last check up on his right eye and the op prep for the left eye. We waited for a long time for his turn, but it was fine because my dad was so clear today, it was great fun chatting. He didn't mix up any names even and was fully with it - it was nearly like having my normal Dad back :)

 

The doc cheered him up some more, because the pressure on the right eye had gone so beautifully down, he was nearly ecstatic about the result :lol: Eye is healing perfectly well, too. So now they agreed, they only have to deal with the left eye as well and all will be fine ^_^

 

Op is next week, which will be full of doctor shuttle service for me again, but after that the worst should be over.

 

Other than that, I don't have much news. House is neat, warm and laundry done. Work is waiting :P  I'll tackle some of it now now though. My brain is just a bit tired for some reason. And my body is too. I obviously trained right, because the DOMs have hit me properly for the first time after those gym sessions...

 

My arms mostly are so sore!! Especially the right arm and shoulder for some reason. Don't really understand that as I thought my right side would be the stronger one, but when I do things with both arms, I feel the right a lot more than the left, so it's not just because I do more with the right.

 

Maybe I even overdid the last training a bit, with the t-bar instead of the punching bag, the heavier kettlebell and the Bulgarian bag extra swings for mobility purposes... hmmm. I might switch the hanging leg raise exercise to something else for a while to give the arms a break there. 

 

The gym has so much fancy stuff lying about that I haven't even explore yet! Last Saturday I watched a girl sit on the bosu ball alternating folded arms and knees with straightening them as into a boat pose. That should train my abs quite well and help with leg lifts, too, right? Maybe I should switch the hanging knee tucks for that...

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Level 18 Wood-Elf Assassin

 

battle log: counting the good things

current challenge: something, nothing, all the things

previous challenges: 25242322212019181716, 151413121110987654, 321

 

How cool is it that the same God who created mountains and oceans and galaxies looked at you and thought the world needed one of you, too

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Having some fun with my 4TW character :D 

 

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Level 18 Wood-Elf Assassin

 

battle log: counting the good things

current challenge: something, nothing, all the things

previous challenges: 25242322212019181716, 151413121110987654, 321

 

How cool is it that the same God who created mountains and oceans and galaxies looked at you and thought the world needed one of you, too

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Your gym sounds amazing. Chalk may help with the sweaty hands and kettlebells. The switch grip swing is great for grip strength, plus I think it's a fun challenge.

 

That's so cool that you get to cut up a deer. I don't even know how to cut up a chicken.:redface-new:

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Wisdom 18   Dexterity 11   Charisma 12   Strength 16  Constitution-12

Elastigirl Endeavors, Experiments, , and Explains - Current Challenge: May 9 to June 12 - Nerd Fitness Rebellion

"If more of us valued food and cheer and song, above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world" J.R.R.Tolkien

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On 12/2/2018 at 9:06 PM, lucky fire dragon said:

I don't know. This whole topic is quite layered to me. I feel bad for judging weight and yet I honestly do just feel the lean muscle is so much prettier... am I bad person for it? I also realize when it comes to people I know, the shape is way less important to me than with people I don't know. 

Of course you're not a bad person for it! Everyone has unique tastes. :) I just think it's important to figure out where it's influenced from. Is it from watching from fitspo "no pain no gain" heavily photoshopped pictures? Or from hot pole dancers? Or artsy dance photos? Or diet magazines? Or lack of exposure to a variety of body shapes? Or because your personal background? As you say it's complex, but worth thinking about if you're going to let it dictate your life in any way. Another thing to question is how much aesthetics is truly worth to you? It might be worth a lot and bring you joy to manipulate your body into a certain shape, or it might not be worth it. There's no right or wrong here.  It's kinda funny, sometimes my mum says she wants abs or whatever and I tell her what she needs to do and her immediate reaction is "fuck that". :P Sure she would prefer to be leaner but not at the expense of food and excessive control. But everyone is different and as long as the amount of happiness is greater than the amount of sacrifice then go for it. But it's good to be clear about it. I mean as clear as it can get, it can really vary day to day.

 

On 12/2/2018 at 9:06 PM, lucky fire dragon said:

When my tummy flops down in shoulderstand I can't breathe as well for instance and I hate that. Or I can't stretch in plough stretch - I can't do that properly when I have those few extra kilos around my middle and yet it's one of my favorites for my back. Those are practical dislikes on the times of weight gain that don't even have to do with any image.

These are good practical reasons, and it totally makes sense to want to lose weight to make things you love more fun or feel better. Though I've seen examples of people in larger bodies (much larger than yours) do both of those so I'm not quite sure I believe you. ;) 

 

On 12/2/2018 at 9:06 PM, lucky fire dragon said:

The lifestyle thing is what I meant. Nice inspiration, but no point at this time in my life (if ever) comparing. It's just beautiful inspiration and I am very grateful for her existence for that. Isn't she amazing? :love-struck:

She is! As I said, I'm a huge fan girl. :P If you'll ever get interested in yummy feeling feel good floor flow her tutorials are great and totally worth the money.

 

On 12/2/2018 at 9:06 PM, lucky fire dragon said:

I think I will aim for the "wrapper" image of my body for now. It's the home I have for my essence here in this world. It's not point defining myself by it, but it's very much worth treating respectfully and in the most healthy ways, because it is actually my most loyal friend from the beginning of my time. Despite all my shortcomings and judgement. I am deeply grateful for that.

 

And I will keep aiming for the fun withing the exercises as such. That is something that I can have here and now, and the journey is the goal. I won't let go of the intention of slimming down some though as I do feel so much more comfortable in my own skin with a few kilos less. No matter what you say :P Let's see how to combine it all in a healthy mix.

Yes and yes! And I honestly believe that your body shape will change in the direction you want simply by doing that.

And I'm really not judging or telling you to be all love and sunshine towards your body. :P Only to not judge it so harshly and to not forget that it's supposed to be about fun in the end. Also, I'm partially bringing this up because it helps me coming to terms with my own feelings about body image. ;) It's hard to accept that my body is weaker and fluffier, especially now when I've been out of training for so long, but I don't want it to get me down. It is what it is, when I start moving more my body will reflect that.

 

On 12/2/2018 at 9:22 PM, lucky fire dragon said:

Heck, I sometimes marvel about the clever things I said, like "did I say that? I better remember that, it was a good point" :lol: 

Haha love it! :D 

 

On 12/2/2018 at 9:22 PM, lucky fire dragon said:

But it somehow doesn't happen on its own...

 

Weird that. :P 

 

On 12/2/2018 at 9:22 PM, lucky fire dragon said:

Carbs also seem to trigger the Leptin hormone - do I remember that right? So if one goes low carb for a while and then has some carbs in between it seems to be more efficient in weight loss than low carb all the way through. I don't know, the more I read about this stuff, the more it looks to me like: eat all the foods in reasonable amounts and the less processed the better, but don't be scared of anything.

  

Then there is the placebo / nocebo  factor. If I am convinced something will help me and take it regularly, the body acts accordingly and it will really help me. If that works for morphine as the body's own pain killers, surely it works for metabolism as well? My placebo might just be water :lol: 

 

Yes that's true. But yeah I agree with you - just eat all the food and don't worry. Because stressing too much about nutrition and weight loss will prevent the weight loss. :P 

Hahaha sorry water won't work against hunger. :P There's only so far placebo/nocebo will take you. But it IS a fascinating topic!

 

On 12/2/2018 at 10:13 PM, lucky fire dragon said:

I know that when I give in to the extra pounds  too much, I get sluggish, so it doesn't just get worse but it dulls me down as well. Is that why I am defending my viewpoint here so much? Or am I defending something that doesn't even help me?

Or are you getting sluggish because you're not training the same amount => extra weight? :) Bit of a chicken-egg situation, but generally speaking high energy levels are associated with exercise and not weight. But remember, I'm only proving a discussion here. :lol: If you feel you have to defend yourself that's kinda interesting in itself, don't you think? ;) 

 

On 12/2/2018 at 10:13 PM, lucky fire dragon said:

I'm not entirely sure. Yet just saying yes, I'll go look for bigger sized role models triggers huge resistance within me. It's no point working against that, I won't do it whole heartedly. I don't really know how to phase this well and I really don't want to hurt anyone's feelings on this. I hope you understand me despite the lack of good words here.

Just to be clear, I would never follow larger size role models just because they're larger. (Or people of colour etc, etc) They have to be awesome, and then the rest is a bonus! But I think it's worth asking the question whether you like a certain body shape because that's all you expose yourself to or because it's the only shape you like? Food for thought, nothing else. :) 

 

On 12/2/2018 at 10:13 PM, lucky fire dragon said:

Yes, I can see the point of me wanting to look good to myself and others, I obviously want to adapt to some societal standards and that has nothing to do with authenticity and maybe therefor it's so easy to stress over and so hard to find lasting joy in. 

True. And again, there's nothing bad about wanting to look good, it's how we're wired (and brutally conditioned). But it sounds like you're judging yourself against a much higher standard than everyone else?

 

On 12/2/2018 at 10:13 PM, lucky fire dragon said:

 Personal wins: I did the things anyway. I'm showing up in the gym with a ridiculous looking pony tail (my hair is still too short for it, but I hate it sticking to my neck when I sweat), with sports bras that don't flatter me at all but are the most comfy, my tummy shows and I keep doing the shoulderstands and headstands anyway.

 This week I'll go train on the pole as well. And I will look into those mirrors and move as beautifully and gracefully as I bloody well can. Hah!

YAY!!!

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On 12/4/2018 at 6:21 PM, Elastigirl said:

Your gym sounds amazing. Chalk may help with the sweaty hands and kettlebells. The switch grip swing is great for grip strength, plus I think it's a fun challenge.

 

Excellent point! Grip strength - of course I'll keep doing them then :) Not sure what the person after me will think of the chalk on the kettlebells, are there any rules on such things at gym? Maybe if I wipe my hands on my towel first, will be fine. At home, that's true I'd go for chalk, another excellent point.

 

Until then I'll stick to

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On 12/4/2018 at 6:21 PM, Elastigirl said:

 

That's so cool that you get to cut up a deer. I don't even know how to cut up a chicken.:redface-new:

 

I don't know about cool :D In any case she did most of it again as we'd probably be still standing there, if it had been me :lol: but I got to cut out the bits between the rips this time, Isn't that something to be proud of hey?! Seriously, I am most proud that this time I knew a little bit of what's what, even if I still would have no clue as to how to go about cutting it. Maybe next year ...

 

So glad she does it for me, also it's nice to spend time with her, she is a most wonderful person.

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Level 18 Wood-Elf Assassin

 

battle log: counting the good things

current challenge: something, nothing, all the things

previous challenges: 25242322212019181716, 151413121110987654, 321

 

How cool is it that the same God who created mountains and oceans and galaxies looked at you and thought the world needed one of you, too

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2 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

Haha sorry about the huge wall of text. :D 

 

Don't lie! You're enjoying this too much :D 

 

I'll get to your wall of text when I am back from choir (or tomorrow if it gets too late) ^_^

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Level 18 Wood-Elf Assassin

 

battle log: counting the good things

current challenge: something, nothing, all the things

previous challenges: 25242322212019181716, 151413121110987654, 321

 

How cool is it that the same God who created mountains and oceans and galaxies looked at you and thought the world needed one of you, too

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2 minutes ago, lucky fire dragon said:

Excellent point! Grip strength - of course I'll keep doing them then :) Not sure what the person after me will think of the chalk on the kettlebells, are there any rules on such things at gym? Maybe if I wipe my hands on my towel first, will be fine. At home, that's true I'd go for chalk, another excellent point.

 

I'd check with the gym, they all have different rules. If they don't allow powder chalk you can use liquid chalk though. :) 

 

3 minutes ago, lucky fire dragon said:

I don't know about cool :D In any case she did most of it again as we'd probably be still standing there, if it had been me :lol: but I got to cut out the bits between the rips this time, Isn't that something to be proud of hey?! Seriously, I am most proud that this time I knew a little bit of what's what, even if I still would have no clue as to how to go about cutting it. Maybe next year ...

No it's totally cool! :D I'd love to learn!

 

3 minutes ago, lucky fire dragon said:

Don't lie! You're enjoying this too much :D 

Hahaha are you insinuating I like provoking people? Then you're totally right. ;) 

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2 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

I'd check with the gym, they all have different rules. If they don't allow powder chalk you can use liquid chalk though. :) 

 

True, I should have some of that left anyway 

 

2 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

 

No it's totally cool! :D I'd love to learn!

 

It was just so bizarre: a week earlier I sit looking at the x-ray images of youngest's elbow joint and see how the carefully had fixed it all and here I was watching someone hack away at a stubborn connection around a shoulder joint that somehow looked so very similar to me :blink: Weird moment. I focused on the meat and meals from thereon and then it was fine again.

 

I am pretty useless in those matter mostly. But I do try to learn and maybe by the time I'm a granny I will cope :P Best story is probably when my boy was like 10 years or so and went fishing with a mate who's granddad had a license and the fished at the local village pond. Mostly they'd throw the little fish right back in again, but the one day, he caught one that was just big enough to justify keeping and eating, so he came home on his little kid scooter with the fish in his pants pocket :lol: ever so proud of course!

 

Me, I was completely at a loss as to what now. Hubby wasn't there, he was travelling in SA at the time and here this young boy wants to of course now fry his fish! So I called the dad of my eldest, who I was pretty sure had some more experience on this and he told me over the phone how to gut the fish without severing the gall bladder which would have spoilt the whole thing obviously and how to get the scales off the fish. I managed quite okay I think. Problem was, my knife wasn't sharp enough and in the end the whole kitchen (and my hair!!!) was full of fish scales, from this tiny thing of fish :lol: 

It was hardly worth frying, but hey my boy was the man of the day and soooooo happy!!

Fortunately I haven't ever had to do that again though.

 

2 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

 

Hahaha are you insinuating I like provoking people? Then you're totally right. ;) 

 

I think you absolutely do ^_^ in a nice enough way that I can't begrudge you though :D 

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Level 18 Wood-Elf Assassin

 

battle log: counting the good things

current challenge: something, nothing, all the things

previous challenges: 25242322212019181716, 151413121110987654, 321

 

How cool is it that the same God who created mountains and oceans and galaxies looked at you and thought the world needed one of you, too

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Okay, here we go Hatter :lol:

 

let's tackle the wall

 

tumblr_n2mb2vzqo41tuqxjjo1_1280-9376.jpg

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Level 18 Wood-Elf Assassin

 

battle log: counting the good things

current challenge: something, nothing, all the things

previous challenges: 25242322212019181716, 151413121110987654, 321

 

How cool is it that the same God who created mountains and oceans and galaxies looked at you and thought the world needed one of you, too

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3 hours ago, lucky fire dragon said:

Not sure what the person after me will think of the chalk on the kettlebells, are there any rules on such things at gym? Maybe if I wipe my hands on my towel first, will be fine. At home, that's true I'd go for chalk, another excellent point.

 

Didn't think of that, since I workout at home. Yeah, people may not like it. 

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Wisdom 18   Dexterity 11   Charisma 12   Strength 16  Constitution-12

Elastigirl Endeavors, Experiments, , and Explains - Current Challenge: May 9 to June 12 - Nerd Fitness Rebellion

"If more of us valued food and cheer and song, above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world" J.R.R.Tolkien

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5 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

Of course you're not a bad person for it! Everyone has unique tastes. :) 

 

Thanks, it was kind of a rhetorical question, but I was in a bit of a low over those days and questioned myself a bit too thoroughly :P 

 

5 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

I just think it's important to figure out where it's influenced from.

 

I agree and I had never thought about it consciously before.

 

5 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

Is it from watching from fitspo "no pain no gain" heavily photoshopped pictures? Or from hot pole dancers? Or artsy dance photos? Or diet magazines? Or lack of exposure to a variety of body shapes? Or because your personal background? As you say it's complex, but worth thinking about if you're going to let it dictate your life in any way.

 

I don't think much of the fitspo thing as this is the first time I have ever set foot in a gym even and I don't own a TV or read magazines, so my exposure to ads is probably less than what most people's. Hot pole dancers are real inspiration for me and the teachers I trained with were super graceful too. They were all really slender though. But this is all pretty recently like within the last 5 years or so. My habit to hide my tummy and feel estranged from it when it gets too big is older than that. 

It might have to do with my family all being slimmer than slim. Not in any unhealthy way, both my siblings are good rock climbers, skiers, ... you name it and very active. My dad used to be too, before his health suddenly started to deteriorate. I am the only one with anything remotely fluffy on her body in my family and I guess that makes it a little awkward.

Then it's that my tummy was the first to get bigger while the rest was still slender and people asked me so often, if I was pregnant when I wasn't ... I just wished, it would be a little less. Or a little lot less :P It became more of a thing over the years then, watching it with suspicion, envying the young girls on the train with their slender waists and big boobs and me having the opposite... I tried to soften around the whole issue - funny hey, how that was exactly what my tummy was doing for me! A few years ago, I even started seeing that, how my tummy might be soft to balance where I am too hard on myself. And I eased on it as much as I could with varying success. On some days I am completely fine with it, on others I feel a huge massive Blah all over again.

The time when I trained so much on the pole and my abs started showing a tiny bit even - oooh that was sooo nice! I'd linger in front of the mirror when changing clothes, just to look at my silhouette and be happy about my tummy :lol: that was very cool!

And now it is a long way away again and I think I hit a point in between where I thought, it's over, I'll never get it back into the beautiful shape it had and that felt really sad. 

 

Funny thing is, that I am now starting to see tiny changes again. Not much and it might be imagination, but hope is back and with it, a better friendship with my body again. As I say during meditation or the like, friendship with my body is easy, no worries. But working out is when the trouble hits. I think, as you say my exposure to body types is a bit limited here. I am familiar with all kinds of body shapes, but when I went anywhere to be active and do any form of sports, I rarely met someone in a larger size doing it. I was soo glad for the few people with a bit of tummy fluff who found their way to the pole studio! It always felt like "Oh good, I'm not alone."

 

On the other hand, maybe it doesn't matter where the images and expectations come from, because I have to deal with the feelings about it as best as I can no matter the trigger.

You gave me a wake up shake to be more conscious of it again and kinder to myself. That's probably the most important part here :) 

 

5 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

Another thing to question is how much aesthetics is truly worth to you? It might be worth a lot and bring you joy to manipulate your body into a certain shape, or it might not be worth it. There's no right or wrong here.  It's kinda funny, sometimes my mum says she wants abs or whatever and I tell her what she needs to do and her immediate reaction is "fuck that". :P Sure she would prefer to be leaner but not at the expense of food and excessive control. But everyone is different and as long as the amount of happiness is greater than the amount of sacrifice then go for it. But it's good to be clear about it. I mean as clear as it can get, it can really vary day to day.

 

Oh, I love your mom!! She is just so cool :D

Yeah, that is a good point. The convenient thing is that as you say form follows function and the things I'd like to be able to do, such as pole tricks, some basic skills on any bar or rings or the like, all that beautiful control and strength that enables one to play with the body, should help shaping my body into some nice aesthetic. 

I can see how it worked like this before: I start getting off my butt, because I don't like my looks and then the feeling of being able to do stuff is so nice, I want more and I get off my butt some more. If I stick to it for long enough my physique starts changing as well and I like that, so I go do some more... that is the cycle I want to get back onto.

 

Somehow my tummy was the part I'd still try to hide though. Maybe I'll do that different this time. See, I do listen ;) 

 

5 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

 

These are good practical reasons, and it totally makes sense to want to lose weight to make things you love more fun or feel better. Though I've seen examples of people in larger bodies (much larger than yours) do both of those so I'm not quite sure I believe you. ;) 

 

Believe me or not, it's true. I don't know how they do it! I've seen it too and I marvel. It might have to do with other factors as well as it differs a little from week to week. Last time was better for instance, but some days are really hard. Same thing with child pose. I have to open my knees otherwise I can't breathe properly. When I weighed 66 kg or less I had no problem with closed knees whatsoever... 

 

5 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

 

She is! As I said, I'm a huge fan girl. :P If you'll ever get interested in yummy feeling feel good floor flow her tutorials are great and totally worth the money.

 

I have it on my radar :) 

5 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

 

Yes and yes! And I honestly believe that your body shape will change in the direction you want simply by doing that.

 

Thanks! Am beginning to hope for that again and even getting a tiny bit excited, even though I know it will need patience. Will bask in the strength progress so long. 

 

5 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

And I'm really not judging or telling you to be all love and sunshine towards your body. :P Only to not judge it so harshly and to not forget that it's supposed to be about fun in the end. Also, I'm partially bringing this up because it helps me coming to terms with my own feelings about body image. ;) It's hard to accept that my body is weaker and fluffier, especially now when I've been out of training for so long, but I don't want it to get me down. It is what it is, when I start moving more my body will reflect that.

 

Thank you for all of it and you are totally right! Clever to tell me and maybe hear yourself say it as well ^_^

 

5 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

 

Yes that's true. But yeah I agree with you - just eat all the food and don't worry. Because stressing too much about nutrition and weight loss will prevent the weight loss. :P 

Hahaha sorry water won't work against hunger. :P There's only so far placebo/nocebo will take you. But it IS a fascinating topic!

 

 

It won't work against real hunger, no, but when the body needs water it can feel like hunger and then it helps to drink a glass first and see. It is definitely working for me. The last couple of days I ended up having two meals per day only instead of three, because of breakfast turning into brunches and a late afternoon meal being supper as well and I wasn't ever really hungry, much to my surprise. Normally I would have been. When a little twinge came I had a glass of water first, noticed how nice it was and didn't feel the need for anything else after that. Today was the first day that I was really hungry. So I adjusted, had an early breakfast and had 3 proper meals again. Tomorrow I'll probably need less again.

 

It's kind of fun experimenting like this. There are no off limit foods, but considering the break hours I want to keep, I do look what will make me last a while and don't go for quick sugar rushes much. Also I notice when I would sometimes just eat out of convenience (because the food is there) or boredom (something to do while waiting on this or that...) and how easy it actually is to not do that. Am very grateful it comes this easy to me right now! It's not to be taken for granted, I know that.

 

Anyway, with two meals instead of three I definitely eat less, because even without any restraint order, when my tummy is full, it's full :) 

So far I haven't seen major changes just yet, but I am willing to be patient and see what happens over time.

 

5 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

 

 

Or are you getting sluggish because you're not training the same amount => extra weight? :) Bit of a chicken-egg situation, but generally speaking high energy levels are associated with exercise and not weight.

 

 Definitely a chicken-egg situation yes! Whatever gets me off my bum is good so I don't care which one it is :D

 

5 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

But remember, I'm only proving a discussion here. :lol: If you feel you have to defend yourself that's kinda interesting in itself, don't you think? ;) 

 

 

It is and I think that is what bummed me out the most. Why did it bug me so much? In hindsight, I had carried some tensions along already and was a bit fragile at the time. Not sure why exactly, I have those phases and they come and go. I've learnt to let them pass and not make major decisions on days like that ;) Today it bugs me way less - but maybe because we now chewed it over so much, it's lost the sting :D whatever sting that was.

 

5 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

Just to be clear, I would never follow larger size role models just because they're larger. (Or people of colour etc, etc) 

 

Ok good, I was seriously confused there.

 

5 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

They have to be awesome, and then the rest is a bonus! But I think it's worth asking the question whether you like a certain body shape because that's all you expose yourself to or because it's the only shape you like? Food for thought, nothing else. :) 

 

Thanks :cheerful:

 

5 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

 

 But it sounds like you're judging yourself against a much higher standard than everyone else?

 

Of course :lol: Why do you think it's good for me to listen to the recordings of what I say to others? 

No really, being kind to others has always been way easier for me than to myself. But in that too, I have an inkling, I am not the only one... 

Level 18 Wood-Elf Assassin

 

battle log: counting the good things

current challenge: something, nothing, all the things

previous challenges: 25242322212019181716, 151413121110987654, 321

 

How cool is it that the same God who created mountains and oceans and galaxies looked at you and thought the world needed one of you, too

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15 minutes ago, Elastigirl said:

Didn't think of that, since I workout at home. Yeah, people may not like it. 

 

Still it's a good idea and I might really use the liquid chalk that is seethrough, so no one will know :ph34r:

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Level 18 Wood-Elf Assassin

 

battle log: counting the good things

current challenge: something, nothing, all the things

previous challenges: 25242322212019181716, 151413121110987654, 321

 

How cool is it that the same God who created mountains and oceans and galaxies looked at you and thought the world needed one of you, too

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Training done :) 

 

Thanks to @Elastigirl encouraging on the one-handed swing I went back to that and it worked quite well today. Maybe because I started straight away with alternating hands instead of 20 sec two handed like last time. Maybe I was airdrying the free hand well enough on the movement :lol: 

 

The other changes were no Bulgarian Bag swinging - I left it out because my shoulder was so sore the next day and I think that bag might still be too heavy for me on that move, or I am too tired for it after the other things,... will do without that one for now.

 

And I switched the hanging knee tucks to those sitting on the bosu ball. Wow, that was tougher than expected! My balance needed some real work here. Could not raise my arms overhead because of the balance, but felt my legs and core being worked nicely with just tucking and stretching them as is :P success

 

My stamina is improving as well, yay.

 

Took a shorter break between first and second round and no break between second and third round. 

1-2 min headstand training against the wall, some good stretching after with lots of happiness about improving flexibility in hips, back and hamstrings ^_^

That's it.

 

Skipped breakfast as I worked on my editing when I got home and rather wanted to have lunch with the kids then. Funny enough, I haven't been hungry since lunch though, only thirsty. I should probably have some supper still as the break until tomorrow morning would be rather long then. But I don't want to eat when not hungry... will see what happens.

 

I'm now going to cook some bone marrow of the deer into a fond - never done that before, hope it turns out nice. Recipe sounds like I can't do much wrong. Let's hope that's true :D

Catching back up on the forums later. I fell asleep after lunch and slept for 2 hours straight and now the day has gotten awefully short.

 

But hey, I have edited and transcribed even 4 of my retreat recordings, so that I can review them better as well and improve on my teachings for next time. Getting there.

 

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Level 18 Wood-Elf Assassin

 

battle log: counting the good things

current challenge: something, nothing, all the things

previous challenges: 25242322212019181716, 151413121110987654, 321

 

How cool is it that the same God who created mountains and oceans and galaxies looked at you and thought the world needed one of you, too

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Got a THIRD workout in for this week, how strong is that :triumphant:

 

So cool, I said to hubby I might go either on the pole to train Saturday or go to the gym again and he says if I go to the gym he'll come along, whoooohooo! So I took him by his word, reminded him all Friday lunch and evening to make sure he can't sneak out on Saturday morning when it's weekend and he doesn't feel like people after a week of working with people and doesn't want to drive anywhere.... and to be honest we both often feel sooooooooo lazy on weekend mornings.

BUT we did it!! 

 

Had a great workout session too.

 

Rowed for 2.1 km as I got a headstart before hubby and as he usually rows until I have my 2 I returned the favor ^_^

 

For circuit training (40 sec each exercise / 50 sec rest, then on to next station, break, repeat for a total of 3 rounds):

- Did single handed swings with the 18 lbs kettlebell, alternating hands for each swing for the first two rounds and then two-handed swings with the 12 kg one for the third round :triumphant:
- not puffing like a steam train anymore after hopping up and down, so yay
- 12 bodyweight rows on sling trainer with feet planted in the middle of the line about 1 meter from the point where the slings would hang straight down (first 8 are good, 10 are hard, last 2 very hard, will stick to that angle for a while me thinks)

- love that T-bar :) It's going really well with 5kg and the movement is smooth now

- lunges with Bulgarian Bag (10kg) on shoulders
- Pushing the power sledge (no extra weight loaded) if I run the whole stretch instead of turning around half way and again, my heart beats like crazy afterwards. That thing is a sneaky devil I keep underestimating it as I run (well jog more than sprint)
- Swinging the big ropes is getting easier, so now I focus on a smooth movement of the ropes, alternating the pattern between left and right side
- push ups on gravity trainer are now at 12 reps in those 40 sec :triumphant:
- sitting on bosu ball tucking my legs in and straightening them is soooo hard still :o where is my balance and core strength gone?

 

You know what I found yesterday? 

 

SOME PARALLETTES standing in the corner!!! How cool is that?! Just standing at the back wall. I will so have to go and try something out on them :D what should I play with first @Elastigirl any ideas? Dips? Easy L-Sit variations?

 

Headstand training against the wall was ok. Not the best in holding long, but I remember activating my shoulders better and beginning to get a feel for my core again in stabilizing. Mostly I respond way to much with the lower arms that are on the floor, I think. Might have to work up the guts to video myself. There's nothing weird about it, but I still feel awkward about it. There is the wanting-to-blend-in effect for sure, because at pole everyone takes videos of themselves and here I haven't seen anyone do that ever yet... oh well, it's not such a big thing. I just have to jump that hurdle once and then it's probably fine. And hit a time where I don't have anyone else in the video, of course.

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Level 18 Wood-Elf Assassin

 

battle log: counting the good things

current challenge: something, nothing, all the things

previous challenges: 25242322212019181716, 151413121110987654, 321

 

How cool is it that the same God who created mountains and oceans and galaxies looked at you and thought the world needed one of you, too

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Haven't done any reading in Atomic Habits over the past days because I finally finished The Obesity Code which was another started book on my kindle. It was interesting in terms of how he looks at many popular diets and their pros and cons. The conclusion seems to be they all have good points and work - for a while. After 6 months to a year even the effect ebbs down even with the best of diets and people start gaining weight again, often more than before.

Fung argues that is because the body is set on a certain insulin level that with time will be reestablished, especially if there is any form of insensitivity towards it already. The insensitivity develops when the insulin levels are high on a continuous basis and that seems the tricky part. With a good diet it is possible to not spike the levels so high anymore, but no food will actually lower the insulin levels. So the best diet can help decrease the ongoing unbalance, but not re-establish the healthy balance.

For doing that, he argues, we need enough time without any food - in other words fasting. The duration of the fast can and should be adjusted individually though as not everyone is coming from the same place and having the same goals. But he says we are built to feast and fast and that I found super interesting.

 

The insulin setpoint story makes a lot of sense to me, as it could explain why I struggled gaining any weight as a teenager, no matter how much I ate and at the same time why I have it the other way round now. As a teenager I ate a lot, but I did often have long breaks in between when I would just forget to eat and end up having 2 meals a day instead of three. I ate pizza, sweets (lots of chocolate but also pure sugar sweets) without any effects whatsoever, but my mom made sure I got a salad with healthy oils and vinegar every day as well and we did also always drink plenty of water throughout our days. Except on weekends when going out, I ate supper no later than 7pm and then nothing until the next morning. In the rush for the school bus, breakfast often got skipped and my first "meal" was a bun with chocolate cream filling during school break. It was a combo that grossed most of my school mates out but I loved it and if you're skinny you don't count calories...

 

When my kids were born I would eat a lot more often! Babies eat often and for some reason young mommies do the same. That would raise my insulin a lot more often and it would have reached a consistently higher level from there on.

Then the kids are old enough to help bake cakes and cookies :P off we go nibbling while baking, in between meals...

 

 

Now I don't eat that often, but the food breaks weren't that long either. Late suppers, a sweet cup of tea in the morning. The amounts might not even have been the thing, but the continuing trigger to keep the insulin up at it's now normal rate. 

So that is what got me to try out increasing the food breaks "fasts" over night and see what it does.

 

Maybe @Mad Hatter is right and it's not the water that takes away hunger. Maybe it's the fasting. Because now that I am looking into it, many people say how surprised they were of hunger decreasing after they started intermittend fasting and how after eating, they are hungrier sooner than on days with some fasting. I find the same for me and it's really surprising. You'd think it would be the other way round.

Water does help though and there have been days, where I ended up having had nearly 4 liters, because it felt so good.

 

On Friday I had a bit of a crisis, feeling nothing is changing, nothing is working, but I also had general blahs that morning. Yesterday I realized I do definitely feel different and also that my food breaks weren't that long yet. I'm more on what would be the maintenance setting and not yet the weight loss rhythm. But I want to build up easy enough to keep it going for a longer time and not just aim for the sky and drop it altogether when I can't keep that up. Am very tempted to try out a full 24 hour fast now, but at the same time I worry that my brain will turn it into this huge thing and make it difficult

 

Any helpful ideas?

 

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Level 18 Wood-Elf Assassin

 

battle log: counting the good things

current challenge: something, nothing, all the things

previous challenges: 25242322212019181716, 151413121110987654, 321

 

How cool is it that the same God who created mountains and oceans and galaxies looked at you and thought the world needed one of you, too

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New thread! How did I not see it earlier! 2 pages to catch uuuup with!?

 

28 minutes ago, lucky fire dragon said:

You know what I found yesterday? 

 

SOME PARALLETTES standing in the corner!!! How cool is that?! Just standing at the back wall. I will so have to go and try something out on them :D what should I play with first @Elastigirl any ideas? Dips? Easy L-Sit variations?

 

Woot :lol:  If I may say, parallettes swings can be fun (example here). You can adjust them to your level, walk through, jump forward to table top, jump back to plank etc.. If you have time, you could look up the last videos (full sequence) in our Parallettes PVPs, we had a bunch of different moves in there.

 

And pole!! :)

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I know, right?! I was busy :triumphant: :lol: 

Felt the same about your thread. I was sure I had subscribed to it earlier already but somehow I obviously hadn't :( but hey, we found each other, so yay!

 

Oh those swings do look like fun!! Do you think they train arms mostly or a big portion of core as well?

Am asking because so far I kept the circuit training as it's currently signed out in the gym as suggested plan and switched the core exercises from the ab roller to other things and now I thought I'd replace the bosu ball balance with some parallettes fun.

But maybe I should replace something else rather, because by that time my arms are a bit fried already and I guess I need them for the parallettes :D

 

Yeah, I might look, but you guys are soooooo strong!!! Will have to pick for the smallest raisins there so to say :P 

 

 

Level 18 Wood-Elf Assassin

 

battle log: counting the good things

current challenge: something, nothing, all the things

previous challenges: 25242322212019181716, 151413121110987654, 321

 

How cool is it that the same God who created mountains and oceans and galaxies looked at you and thought the world needed one of you, too

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Late to the party here, but I loved this part:

 

On 12/3/2018 at 2:09 PM, lucky fire dragon said:

Oh, and this afternoon I have another adventure waiting: cutting up a deer calf!! Hubby is friends with a hunter and they reserved a whole calf for us this winter, last year we got half a one. It would normally come pretty much unprepared, with bones and rips and things all attached and I am so utterly useless at taking meat apart! But fortunately we are friends with the hunter's wife again and she helped me big time with all the preparing and portioning for freezing last year and promised to do so again. She is a star! I made up for it by treating her with some cranio sacral therapy sessions, which she enjoyed very much, so that too, we'll do again. I wonder how much she will let me do myself today.... last year, I cut maybe three slices of a chunk before she took the knife from my hands and said "Let me do that rather"

I used to be this way, but have been kind of forced to deal with it.  Our friend has a farm and he sometimes brings over stuff for us and a couple of times it has been chickens or ducks that he has just slaughtered.  He cleans and plucks them before bringing them over, but I still have to clean out a bunch of organs and then divide it up for cooking.  Luckily Youtube has tutorials for EVERYTHING!

 

If you get another one next year I'm confident you will be able to get everything prepared like a boss :) 

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Intro Thread    Bodyweight Exercise Library

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