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Jonesy

It's probably psychological - Jonesy 2019.1

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The second half of 2018 was all kind of crazy for me, good crazy though. I tried to keep up with simple challenges but that didn’t work. Between frustrations at work, making the decision to look for another job, interviewing, getting a new job, learning the new job, getting promoted and learning another new job, I was emotionally exhausted. I barely kept myself functioning. While I still have an incredibly hard upcoming 2019, I think I might be at a point where I can focus on myself outside of work. Also as a note, I did a pretty fantastic job keeping my weight down and not eating my emotions back to where I started in 2018.

 

The following Home, Health, and Financial sections will be the foundation for all my goals and challenges for 2019. I’ll break that down after the last section.

 

HOME

One of the biggest areas in my life that cause me to relapse into old habits is the chaos that is called my home. I jokingly say that my house looks like I’m losing a game of Jumanji. Each year I make an effort to get on a cleaning schedule or organize the disaster I live in. Every year it starts out well then things start to snowball and accumulate, bringing me crashing down and curling up on the sofa to watch Netflix. I'm looking at you, Michael Scott! I decided to read The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing by Marie Kondo. For years I’ve wanted to read this book but had anxiety just thinking about it. Well, I had lots of quiet data entering time at work so I downloaded the audiobook and that helped me start and finish the book. Just thinking about how she describes the process still makes me uneasy but I think I need that. I just have too much stuff I never touch and the clutter is driving me insane. Marie Kondo says it can take 6 months to a year to fully tidy up and I think I’ve broken down her categories pretty good so I can hit my goal of December 31, 2019. Bonus, Marie Kondo's Netflix show starts on January 1st. I'll try to incorporate that into my goal somehow. 

 

HEALTH

I can’t ignore health so of course, it has its own section. My health section covers exercise and nutrition. 2018 was a year of slacking when it came to exercise. I don’t remember the last time I went to the gym or did a routine workout. I could check but I honestly don't care...I don’t have a specific end goal for workouts in mind but one big goal is doing the Christmas Rush 5k in December. I have no excuse for not doing it since it’s in my town and only a 5k. Nutrition was not horrible but it can always be better. I want to get back in the habit of not drinking my calories, I want to make sure I’m making my lunches for work and it’s always good to get more veggies!

 

FINANCIAL

Who doesn’t want financial freedom? With my new job and new salary, I have a real chance to pay off my debt and start working on my retirement. I took some time and did a rough draft of my budget, plus snowball payments on each of my debts and did my budget out until I had no more debt. According to my math, I can pay off everything, including my townhouse, by my 40th birthday. With a pretty aggressive budget plan, it is doable. The budget does not include potential income increases and increased bills but it’s a great place to start.

 

2019 MONTHLY CHALLENGE BREAKDOWN

 

I’ll follow the challenge dates but all my goals start on Day 1 of the month and end on either the 28th, 30th, or 31st of the challenge months. Some challenges will have 2 different sets of goals, I’m ok with that. I’ve found that not starting on the 1st can stress me out and I want to do as much to avoid that as possible. Plus it’s easier for me to keep track that way.

 

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JANUARY GOALS

HOME: MK Cloth: Make room/spot for all items in one room, go through each category below and separate into items that spark joy, items that need to be discarded, and items to be donated. Once separated, either put away, discard (get it out of the house) or donate. Once that is done, move onto the next category. 

  1. Tops
  2. Bottoms
  3. Undergarments
  4. Jackets
  5. Bags
  6. Shoes
  7. Accessories

HEALTH: No Soda: Hard Cider is ok when eating out since I don't drink much of it anyways and I'll never have more than 2 because money. Lol

  1. Soda 30/31

 

FINANCIAL: Budget: Put together January's budget, including all bills, extra debt payments, saving, and non-standard expenses. 

  1. Budget
  2. Pay Bills - Online and In-person
  3. Transfer Money to Savings
  4. Pay extra to Care Credit Loan - Call
  5. Cash out
    1. Gas
    2. Groceries
    3. Spending Money

 

FEBRUARY GOALS

HOME: MK Cloth: Make room/spot for all items in one room, go through each category below and separate into items that spark joy, items that need to be discarded, and items to be donated. Once separated, either put away, discard (get it out of the house) or donate. Once that is done, move onto the next category. 

  1. Tops
  2. Bottoms
  3. Undergarments
  4. Jackets
  5. Bags
  6. Shoes
  7. Accessories

 

HEALTH: 4 HIIT Workouts: Get in 1 workout before the end of the challenge

 

FINANCIAL: On-time Payments

  1. Budget
  2. Pay Bills - Online and In-person 2-3 days prior to the due date
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2 hours ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

Following. I like the way you set up your challenge and look forward to hearing about how your process of decluttering goes. If I may ask, what makes you nervous/anxious about the thought of decluttering?

 

Welcome! 

 

1. The whole process seems daunting, It's a huge undertaking.

2. I think I panic about the items usage. Like I may need that item later or that as soon as I get rid of something I'll need it. I worry a lot. I think this might be something hoarders worry about? 

3. I spent my hard earned money on an item that I never used. That pisses me off. Now I want to get rid of it 5 years later? 

4. I have to be honest with myself about how I feel about each item. Feelings have not always been my friend and over the years I've trampled them down. After 33 years, I still don't deal well with my strong emotions. 

 

I'm pretty sure there might be more. Lol

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I'll be following too. I like your goals very much and may borrow your path to declutteredness since that's one of my dragons and it looks pretty sound.

 

Take care of yourself and have fun. :)

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2 hours ago, Jonesy said:

1. The whole process seems daunting, It's a huge undertaking.

A very normal way to feel. The perfectionist in me sees a task and wants to go from start to finish in one fell swoop and gets overwhelmed.

2 hours ago, Jonesy said:

2. I think I panic about the items usage. Like I may need that item later or that as soon as I get rid of something I'll need it. I worry a lot. I think this might be something hoarders worry about? 

It is something hoarders mention. I think we all deal with that to some degree or another. One thing that may help is to remind yourself it hasn't been needed in however long it was in the pile. You can also consider how easy it would be to get a new one when making decisions.

2 hours ago, Jonesy said:

3. I spent my hard earned money on an item that I never used. That pisses me off. Now I want to get rid of it 5 years later? 

Ah yes, the sunk cost fallacy

2 hours ago, Jonesy said:

4. I have to be honest with myself about how I feel about each item. Feelings have not always been my friend and over the years I've trampled them down. After 33 years, I still don't deal well with my strong emotions. 

Feelings can be hard, especially if you have trained yourself not to feel them. I needed counseling to get in touch with mine and learn to express them well.

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5 hours ago, Jean said:

I'll be following too. I like your goals very much and may borrow your path to declutteredness since that's one of my dragons and it looks pretty sound.

 

Take care of yourself and have fun. :)

 

Welcome! 

I'm hoping I broke down the first goal enough that it will make it easier to get done. :) 

 

 

2 hours ago, Atrytone said:

I'm a sucker for putting finances in order. Following.

 

Welcome. There is something incredibly freeing and magical about paying off debts. 

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2 hours ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

A very normal way to feel. The perfectionist in me sees a task and wants to go from start to finish in one fell swoop and gets overwhelmed.

 

Me too! Which is why I like the way Marie Kondo method. She instructs you to deal with each category, even to break it down more if you need to. Get it sorted, find it a home if you are keeping an item or get it out of the house if you are not. Once you have done that, move on to the next. It's not meant to be something quick and the process is supposed to take time. 

 

2 hours ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

It is something hoarders mention. I think we all deal with that to some degree or another. One thing that may help is to remind yourself it hasn't been needed in however long it was in the pile. You can also consider how easy it would be to get a new one when making decisions.

 

 

This is a good thing to remember and a good way to look at it. I think where this hurts the most is craft supplies, so much stuff in bulk! 

 

3 hours ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

Ah yes, the sunk cost fallacy

 

“All of these things are irrational, in the sense that you should realize the money is gone,” Olivola says. “But I do think people do these things because they want to convince themselves that they’ve managed to recapture the loss.”

 

I'm not sure if I'm trying to recapture the loss or if I'm trying to convince myself that I at least got my monies worth. Is that the same thing?

 

3 hours ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

Feelings can be hard, especially if you have trained yourself not to feel them. I needed counseling to get in touch with mine and learn to express them well.

 

I think it's easy to live in denial. I've thought about counseling but have a hard time justifying it to myself. Part of me feels like I don't need it. I'm not sure how to express that correctly but I guess I feel like counseling is used during times of struggle and I don't feel like I've struggled. Plus if it costs anything outside of what I can get from my benefits, I don't want to make that a cost priority. 

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2 minutes ago, Jonesy said:

“All of these things are irrational, in the sense that you should realize the money is gone,” Olivola says. “But I do think people do these things because they want to convince themselves that they’ve managed to recapture the loss.”

 

I'm not sure if I'm trying to recapture the loss or if I'm trying to convince myself that I at least got my monies worth. Is that the same thing?

I think the two possibilities are similar enough not to make a difference.  

4 minutes ago, Jonesy said:

I think it's easy to live in denial. I've thought about counseling but have a hard time justifying it to myself. Part of me feels like I don't need it. I'm not sure how to express that correctly but I guess I feel like counseling is used during times of struggle and I don't feel like I've struggled. Plus if it costs anything outside of what I can get from my benefits, I don't want to make that a cost priority. 

That's because there's still a stigma associated with getting counseling or having mental health issues. You have struggled, you just don't realize it. Suppressing your feelings has hurt you in ways you won't even realize until you begin to heal. The cost thing I totally get. If your employer has an Employee Assistance Program you might be able to get some free sessions.

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Jonesy's back! Hi! Exciting new year!

 

I have become a big fan of decluttering. It feels great when you actually make some progress. I have learned that even if I occasionally have a pang about getting rid of something, I rarely even think about it once it's gone and I've never regretted getting rid of something I don't use, and it's now become routine. I'm taking a load of donations to the local queer youth charity shop this week before I go back to work on Monday.

 

A trick for clothes: I turn all my hangers around so they're facing backward, and then when I actually wear something and hang it back up, I put it back forward. Then I set a calendar reminder and in (two months, six months, whatever) I can see what I haven't worn at all, because it's still on a backwards hanger.

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4 hours ago, RogueLibrarian said:

A trick for clothes: I turn all my hangers around so they're facing backward, and then when I actually wear something and hang it back up, I put it back forward. Then I set a calendar reminder and in (two months, six months, whatever) I can see what I haven't worn at all, because it's still on a backwards hanger.

 

I've read tricks like this and Marie Kondo mentions them in her book but does not advise using them. I think it's because while it starts out as a great idea, we often don't follow through with it and we end up keeping things that don't spark joy, just for their usefulness. Which has happened to me in the past. Also, clothing is going to be hard. As a plus size women, clothing has always been kind of a depressing thing and while I do have some things that I do like, most are owned out of necessity.

 

What I really like about the konmari method is that you are building an environment of positivity and love. Why do we keep things that cause unhappy feelings? If something has outlived its usefulness or doesn't bring me joy anymore, I'll thank it for the job it did and get it out of the house! That's the plan anyways! 

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Yayyy, getting back at it. :) I'll be joining you with decluttering for sure -- the less to bring with you to move the better. ;) 

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Hi!!! It was your challenge spreads posted on IG that gave me the final push to get over myself and get back in the forums. So for that.

I Marie Kondoed my clothes and a lot of my craft supplies and it felt SO good. I still have a long way to go with the rest of my stuff but the concept of letting go of things that don't serve my happiness - that I'm keeping from guilt it fear - is so valuable!

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11 hours ago, raptron said:

Yayyy, getting back at it. :) I'll be joining you with decluttering for sure -- the less to bring with you to move the better. ;) 

 

Thank you! I love the act of starting with a clean slate, aka purging before a move. Lol

 

8 hours ago, karinajean said:

Hi!!! It was your challenge spreads posted on IG that gave me the final push to get over myself and get back in the forums. So emoji173.pngemoji173.pngemoji173.pngfor that.

I Marie Kondoed my clothes and a lot of my craft supplies and it felt SO good. I still have a long way to go with the rest of my stuff but the concept of letting go of things that don't serve my happiness - that I'm keeping from guilt it fear - is so valuable!

 

Yay! I'm glad my post could help give you the nudge you needed! 

 

Today I readied the space for my konmaring. I cleaned and cleared my 2nd bedroom just for this. Also on day 2 of no soda and paid my mortgage, my internet, credit card #1 and my Dental loan plus made one additional payment on it.

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JONESY IS BACK! So stoked. 

 

I JUST watched Marie Kondo's new show and after one episode I went through 3 different kitchen drawers and made them WAY easier to use. I am planning on doing way more too. I'm still not sure about the "sparks joy" part but that might be because I haven't read the book (yet?). 

 

Following! (Obvs)

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13 hours ago, Asa Pond said:

JONESY IS BACK! So stoked. 

 

I JUST watched Marie Kondo's new show and after one episode I went through 3 different kitchen drawers and made them WAY easier to use. I am planning on doing way more too. I'm still not sure about the "sparks joy" part but that might be because I haven't read the book (yet?). 

 

Following! (Obvs)

 

Feels good to be back in the challenge swing! Awesome job on tidying up the kitchen. I can't wait to get there.

 

The spark joy concept makes more sense if you read the book. She barely touches on it in the first episode. The sparks joy concept is about creating an environmental that makes you happy. So you only want to keep items that make you feel joy. She says that we only have the capacity to be emotional attached to so many things at a time so make sure you're attached for the right reasons and to the items that truly matter to you. 

 

I was feeling super unmotivated to be a human today, and after a 2 hour nap I made a deal with myself. Watch the first episode of the new Marie Kondo show and if I'm not motivated to make some progress, then shower and go to bed early. I ended up moving all my clothes from the hallway, my downstairs jackets and a quarter of my bedroom clothes to my 2nd bedroom. They are in piles by bottoms, tops, cardigans, undergarments and jackets. I made good progress. 

 

Also, Marie Kondo is like a ray of sunshine! 

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8 hours ago, Jonesy said:

Marie Kondo is like a ray of sunshine! 

 

She really is. She just seems like such a precious human being. 

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9 hours ago, Jonesy said:

I was feeling super unmotivated to be a human today, and after a 2 hour nap I made a deal with myself. Watch the first episode of the new Marie Kondo show and if I'm not motivated to make some progress, then shower and go to bed early. I ended up moving all my clothes from the hallway, my downstairs jackets and a quarter of my bedroom clothes to my 2nd bedroom. They are in piles by bottoms, tops, cardigans, undergarments and jackets. I made good progress. 

 

Also, Marie Kondo is like a ray of sunshine! 

Dang, sounds like it was a good deal to have made! 

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4 hours ago, raptron said:

Dang, sounds like it was a good deal to have made! 

 

I'm like a child, anything to stay awake. 

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Still no soda and before Book Club tonight I moved all my clothes from my closet to the 2nd bedroom. I now have a pile of clothes that is as high as my waist. All that's left is the stuff in my bedroom that I've been too lazy to do anything with. 

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Been drinking more iced tea lately instead of soda, even had some pizza and didn't cave. 

 

Reworked my budget because my HOA's went up. Had to make some adjustments to spending and saving amounts. Went through and paid all online bills as well as made an extra payment on my Care Credit loan. Only bills left to pay are auto pay bills and my HOA, which I need to drop off before the 10th. Moved money into savings, next paycheck I'll move 50 more. Went and got cash this weekend to cover gas, groceries and the spending money I have budgeted. I'm trying hard to go cash only. 

 

Home

Clothes are all in the 2nd bedroom now. Plan is to go through undergarments tonight. I'm switching up the order because I realized I have a lot of shirts that might be sentimental to me and I want to save those for last. Items 1-4 are all ready to go through. 5-7 will be compiled once the others are done. 

  1. Undergarments
  2. Bottoms
  3. Tops
  4. Jackets
  5. Bags
  6. Shoes
  7. Accessories

Health

  1. Soda 7/31

Financial 

  1. Budget
  2. Pay Bills - Online and In-person
  3. Transfer Money to Savings
  4. Pay extra to Care Credit Loan - Call
  5. Cash out
    1. Gas
    2. Groceries
    3. Spending Money
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I love iced tea. I make big pitchers of hibiscus tea in the fridge. 

 

And yeah, I feel like shirts would definitely be the hardest to purge, so good strategy. 

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7 hours ago, raptron said:

I love iced tea. I make big pitchers of hibiscus tea in the fridge. 

 

And yeah, I feel like shirts would definitely be the hardest to purge, so good strategy. 

 

I've never made anything but Kool Aid in a big pitcher and half that was sugar. Lol. I should try it with tea. My mom used to make sun tea in a huge glass pitcher. She would make it outside during the one week of sun we would get in the summer. 

 

6 hours ago, RogueLibrarian said:

Look at this financial organizing go!

 

Being financially responsible feels so good. 

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