Seabright's 2019 Battle Log of Awesomeness

[Seabright]

Thurs Sept 12

 

Prepare for the aftermath! And may the odds be ever in your favor.

 

Update: You know, there really wasn't an aftermath. And 2 days later we were having an innocuous conversation about something completely unrelated. What does that mean? I guess it's the usual: Stand up and speak your truth, even if your voice shakes. 

 

[Seabright]

Mon Sept 23

 

Oy. Eyeball surgery next Monday, so no makeup this week. Talk about bravery!

 

Eating

• Breakfast - veggie omelet, bacon, turkey sausage.
• Lunch - salad w/chicken and veggies, dried cranberries and walnuts on top.
• Dinner - breakfast for dinner: eggs w/spinach, bell peppers and onions and 2 turkey sausages.
• Snacks - oy. 2 donuts. 

 

Monday is donut day at work, and they are EVERYWHERE. I had a hearty breakfast at the cafeteria to get me through and hunkered down in my office before they started to proliferate. But eventually I had to emerge, and I walked right by 'em. And then I had to go over to another building, and had to walk right by 'em.

 

I'm going to plan a route in and out of the buildings that completely bypass the donuts. More steps are good in any case. It's seeing them that drives me over the edge.

 

Exercise

• Be best laid plans...overslept, ended up working through lunch, stayed late to work on something, got home after dark and collapsed. 
• This sh*t cannot stand. I know the little gray kitty has become all cuddly-wuddly and purry-wurry and totally adorable in the morning, but if I don't get things in before I leave for work, that's often it for the day. 

Taking time

•  

Bravery

• On deck: Figure out how to drive that work stream. This time for realties.
• Update: Not done.
• Other bravery: Decided to not move forward with someone I really liked, because the craft wasn't there. That was much harder than you'd think it would be. 

Notice something beautiful

• Little Dolly, snuggling in my arms this morning, softly purring. She's learning how to be a regular cat. It really is beautiful, even if it means I don't get any morning exercise. So many purrs!

 

[Seabright]

Side Note:

 

I really liked that 'What went well' exercise. I hereby commit to trying it out on my team -- at 1/1's and maybe as a way to kick off a team meeting. 

[Seabright]

Tue Sept 24

 

Eating

• Breakfast - veggie omelet, bacon, turkey sausage.
• Lunch - extremely weird and icky working lunch. ended up putting some onions and bell peppers in a tortilla and calling it a day.
• Dinner - no time to eat before class. scraped the veggies and chicken off the top of a JITB teriyaki bowl and ate the egg roll.
• Snacks - banana. better today.

 

Exercise

• 15 mins of yoga.
• Line dancing.

Taking time

• None. I am so tired. Fell asleep at 8:30pm.

Bravery

• On deck: Ironically, have a meeting about how to have courage. 
• Update: Well, that was different. Non-meeting due to another's actions. 
• More: Courageously worked to not take that personally, but I'll admit it was a challenge for me. Went back to my non-violent communication outline, and my catastrophic reaction reframing exercise. Took about an hour of journaling, a long drive home, and a line dancing class, but finally was able to get to another perspective.
• Taking a hard look at myself and how personally I took this--and how quickly my mind went to revenge-and-grudge mode--took some work. I'm giving myself an A for brave self-examination.

Notice something beautiful

• A beautiful beautiful sunset. All of us dancers stopped for a moment and looked at the sky. 

[Seabright]

Tue Oct 15

 

Been feeling a little this and that. A tad at sea for some reason. A little here and there. A little nonesuch. 

 

I think maybe I'll do National Novel Writing Month this November. The little in and out feels like it has a root cause in lack of creative expression...lack of feeling like I have anything to express at all. What better way to shake that off than writing 50,000 words in 30 days?

 

Eating

• Breakfast - veggie omelet, bacon, turkey sausage.
• Lunch - salad w/chicken, veggies, walnuts and dried cranberries.
• Dinner - grilled chicken w/veggies.

 

Exercise

• 10 mins meditation.
• 12 minute walk. I figured the 12-minute walk you take is better than the 7-mile hike you don't take.

Taking time

• Sat in my new little arm chair in my little office with my little kitty on my lap.

Bravery

• On deck: Get pushy with those assisted living invoices. For realsies this time. It goes against the grain, I know, but this sh*t cannot stand.
• Update: Did it. I was a nice version of pushy, but firmly said that it had to be done today. Got an update later in the afternoon confirming that it got done.
• Yay.

Notice something beautiful

• A lovely misty pre-dawn. 

[Seabright]

Wed Oct 16

 

Oh, yeah. I had cataract surgery a few days ago. This was the cataract that was CAUSED by the surgery for the macular hole in my right eye. Oy.

 

Starting to feel better, and less weird in that eye. Hey, maybe that's why I've been feeling a little off center. Hmmmmmmmm.

 

Eating

• Breakfast - veggie omelet, bacon, sausage. i'm going to have to cut out the meat products. soon. really soon.
• Lunch - salad w/chicken, veggies, walnuts, and dried cranberries.
• Snacks - oat-apple mini gluten-free thingy.
• Dinner - chicken strips and fries, a function of running out of time.

 

Exercise

• 10 mins meditation.
• 10 mins yoga stretchification.
• 15 minute walk, in the form of multiple back-and-forths to various buildings.
• 2-hour bass gig. It's been a while!

Taking time

• Inhaled in traffic and thought about what might free me from something that just plain doesn't go that well. 

Bravery

• On deck: Do some of that stuff!!!! (<- !!!!!)
• Update: Didn't do. Boo.

Notice something beautiful

• A definite cold fall snap in the air this morning. Felt good!

[Seabright]

Thurs Oct 17

 

The 30th anniversary of the Loma Prieta SF Bay Area 1989 earthquake. I was there, working in the Marina. Normally I would have been on the Bay Bridge at 5:04pm, sitting in traffic. I wasn't that day, though, because I stayed late at work in order to watch the start of the A's vs Giants baseball game at the TGIF's down the street. As did many many people. The Cypress structure would normally have been gridlocked wall-to-wall cars, but on that day most of the Bay Area stayed late or went home early to watch the  trans-Bay world series, the first cross-town world series since 1956. 67 people died that day, but hundreds were NOT on that freeway structure...and not on the Bay Bridge, and not on the Embarcadero freeway...because of that game. 

 

It took me 2 days to get home. I ended up in Mission Dolores park that first evening, because I didn't know where to go or what to do. I was watching the smoke rise from the big fire in the Marina, when another girl walked up and we started talking. She lived in the Marina, but wasn't sure how to get home. She invited me over to her boyfriend's apartment ('You'd better come with me'), and there I found a bunch of truly hilarious people lighting birthday candles because they didn't have a flashlight. Their big Irish family had flown in from Dublin that morning for a wake, and we all drank Bailey's Irish Cream and talked. A neighbor knocked on the door, and told us that someone down the street had a satellite phone, so I went and stood in line to use it, and finally finally I was able to call my Mom. It was 3am in Albuquerque, and she was up. She had been waiting by the phone for me to call. 

 

That was a day.

[Seabright]

Mon Oct 21

 

Had a thoughtful weekend, and a good 'un, too. Lots of work in the garden. Plants going in the ground, with me digging big holes and lovingly picking out rocks and stones as the dirt goes back in. Lots of thinking about moments of joy. Thinking about where those little critters have gone lately, and how to get 'em back. Narrowed in on a weekly event that has ramifications all week long and realized...if the answer isn't 'hell yeah!' then it's gotta be 'no.'

 

Eating

• Breakfast - veggie omelet w/spinach, maters, onions, and artichoke hearts, along with bacon and sausage. 
• Lunch - the usual.
• Dinner - can't remember, but I don't think it was too bad.

 

Exercise

• 14 mins meditation.
• 20 mins yoga.

 

Bravery

• On deck:
     - Make the optometry appointment.
     - Make a conscious decision around Dolly's meds (yes/no).
     - Look at them thar goals and make 'em better.
     - The big 'un: plan that meeting and find a way to love this person.
     - Ask someone else to make dinner tonight.

[Seabright]

Thur, Dec 12

 

Back! I'm back!

 

Hey! I did National Novel Writing Month! 51,014 words of Big Fun in 30 days. I'm proud that i did it, proud that I was consistent, and proud that I kept at it. Parts of my story I really love, most of it's pretty bad. There's a lot more there, if I want. Some day? Or not. Doesn't matter. There's still a bit of the story floating around in my head. 

 

The only way to get that done, though, was sort of to drop everything else. And I mean everything. No meditation, no exercise, no eating right, no taking time, no noticing nothing. I learned a lot, though, mostly about the value of writing each morning, and the gentle joy that brings to your day. 

 

I'm still trying to get back on track, and it's now been almost 2 weeks since NaNoWriMo ended. There are things I've been thinking about doing, and the NaNo experience made me see that they're possible. It's up to me. 

 

I realized that NOT doing NaNo these last years has been stressful. I haven't written a Christmas letter or sent out cards these last years either...and that's been bumming me out. I have a hankering to get an advanced degree, and I'm starting to see that NOT embarking on that is stressful. 

 

The trick will be to find a way to move forward with all the things. Do the creative, early morning stuff, but still eat right, meditate, and exercise. 

 

Can it be done? Maybe not, but it will be fun to give it a whirl. 

[Jupiter]

On 12/12/2019 at 6:59 AM, Seabright said:

Hey! I did National Novel Writing Month! 51,014 words of Big Fun in 30 days. I'm proud that i did it, proud that I was consistent, and proud that I kept at it. Parts of my story I really love, most of it's pretty bad. There's a lot more there, if I want. Some day? Or not. Doesn't matter. There's still a bit of the story floating around in my head. 

 

Very nice, congrats!!

 

On 12/12/2019 at 6:59 AM, Seabright said:

 

The trick will be to find a way to move forward with all the things. Do the creative, early morning stuff, but still eat right, meditate, and exercise. 

 

Yeah, that's definitely a tough balance, but I'm sure you'll figure it out.

 

 

[Seabright]

Revisiting Oct 21

 

I just really re-read Oct 21 and realized that I should note down some progress. In no particular order:

• The plants are in the ground. Tossed some wildflower seeds around, too, as well. 
• The weekly event is now no more, and instead I have a monthly event with the same people. It was painful getting there, and may have some of those pesky hey-you've-just-damaged-your-career-irreparably ramifications. The end result, though, is that meeting was fraught with tension, and I really dreaded it. Done!
• Did the cataract surgery, and got new glasses. Hey, now I can see out of that right eye. Coolness!
• I worked on my work goals and made them better. That was also hard, but glad that I did it.
• We decided not to give Dolly the twice-daily meds, and instead we did 2 injections over the course of a  month. Much better. And she's all better, too.
• I had that one meeting, and it went really well.
• I asked someone else to make dinner and the world didn't end. 

Yay!

 

[Seabright]

Sat, Dec 21

 

I hereby announce the beginning of:

 

Seabright's Personal 2 Weeks of Getting My Act Together Challenge

 

 

Today is the start of my 2-week vacation. It originally started out as a few days of vacation, and then I thought, what the hell. 2 weeks. 2 weeks it is!

 

During this time I'm going to focus on setting myself up to hit the ground running on all cylinders in 2020. I'll find a routine that works, return to the kind of eating that makes me feel good, and find a way to get a walk in, even when it's raining. Atmospheric river be damned. In there somewhere I've got garden stuff to do, and house stuff, and financial stuff, but those are all nice-to-haves. 

 

Mornings to look like this:

1. Get up.
2. Feed the little grey-kins.
3. Medidate.
4. Yoga.
5. Neti pot while making tea.
6. Journaling.
7. Shower and dress.
8. Breakfast.
9. Start the day.

You'll notice there's no reading-the-news-and-getting-all-upset in there. If I feel like it, I can do that after journaling, but I will set the time for 15 minutes to keep me from sitting there all day. I've broken the social media habit, but realize that obsessively reading the news has taken it's place. No bueno.

 

I'm also going to find time to play my mandolin, even if it's only for 20 minutes a day. I now have my personal space, and I have the time. I also have the inclination, which I haven't had for a while. Restart!

 

I know the first few days may be rocky while I find my rhythm. That's okay. Anything that happens after breakfast can be a little wonky. 

 

Ready set go!

[Seabright]

Sat, Dec 21 (a bit later)

 

The challenge begins!

 

Morning:

• Meditation - 16 mins.
• Yoga - 20 mins.
• Neti pot - done.
• Journaling - done. 

 

Eating

• Breakfast - eggs, onions, turkey sausage
• Lunch - am cliff bar, pm cliff bar
• Dinner - chicken w/veggies

 

Activity

• Walking - about 30 minutes with some stairs thrown in. Done before the headache set it.
• Mandolin - nada. headache from coffee-lessness brought me down. Spent the rest of the day in bed.

 

Bravery

• First challenge day. No coffee.
• Update: Did okay. I knew this first day was going to be about minimums, and that's okay.

[Seabright]

Sun, Dec 22

 

Holy smokes! Just realized that today is that last day I can do Christmas shopping. Yowzah. Tiny bit freaked out.

 

Morning:

• Meditation - 18 mins.
• Yoga - 25 mins.
• Neti pot - done.
• Journaling - done. 

 

Eating

• Breakfast - eggs, onions, red bell pepper, spinach, turkey sausage
• Lunch - an apple pastry
• Dinner - 3 fish tacos, with flour tortillas, handful of chips

 

Activity

• Walking - here and there, added up to about 20 mins
• Mandolin - nada

 

Bravery

• On deck: Actually show up for the yoga workshop I signed up for. I paid in advance, to help up the odds. 
• Update: I went! Walked there, too. It was great!

[Seabright]

Mon, Dec 23

 

Lunch with a friend today.

 

Morning:

• Meditation - 19.5 mins.
• Yoga - 25 mins.
• Neti pot - done.
• Journaling - done. 

 

Eating

• Breakfast - 
• Lunch - 
• Dinner - 

 

Activity

• Walking - 
• Mandolin -

 

Bravery

• On deck: make that paleo chili that i bought all the ingredients for.
•  

[Seabright]

Fearless Challenge Update

 

Well, that was a bust. So, from this I learned that the holidays are absolutely the worst time to try and do something like that. Too much going on, too much driving, long nights, big meals, get-togethers, and what-not. 

 

One thing that stuck, though, was the morning routine. That just felt good--and sustainable. Meditation, yoga, morning pages. Mind, body, spirit. So, yay for that.

 

 

[Seabright]

2019 RECAP!

 

Let's take a look back and see how we did. What worked? What didn't? What did I learn?

As a reminder, I picked ONE goal, and articulated 3 ways to get there. Then, I chose ONE or TWO power words to help me focus all year long.

 

 

GOAL FOR 2019: Focus on Fun!

• Have fun, mind, body and soul, by eating paleo, getting exercise, taking daily time for myself.
• Focus on Fun tagline: If the answer isn't 'hell yeah!' then it's 'no'. 

 

1. Have fun by eating paleo

 

Results: Meh

• Started strong but quickly went awry. Some good days, but more days that weren't so good.
• Looking back over the log, it was a pretty stressful year, and that equated to sloppy eating, which equated to a deep and persistent cough that's hung on for months and months.

What I've learned

• General stress makes it more challenging to stay focused on lifestyle stuff that would eventually help me feel better---and reduce stress. 
• When feeling better and more energy take a while to manifest, it's challenging to keep your eyes on the prize.
• It's okay to let Monday be Donut Day. But that has to be the only thing that happens that week.
• It's okay to have jam night be beer night or margarita night. But that has to be the only night that's like that.
• Staying focused takes energy.

 

2. Have fun by getting exercise

 

Results: Not bad.

• Really embraced yoga, and ended the year strong.
• Did BWW with my coach for the majority of the year.
• Went line dancing.
• Took sailing lessons.
• Went on lots of great hikes.

What I've learned

• For a daily practice, yoga is the thing I like best. It's doable at home without special equipment, I love doing it, and it reduces stress in a big way. More please.
• For more physical stuff, hiking is the thing I like best. Put on your shoes and go exploring. There's so  much  hiking here close by, and it lends itself to destination trips, too. More please. 
• For BWWs, I like getting stronger faster, but I sort of hate doing them. It feels too much like an obligation. I used to think they were an absolutely necessary part of getting stronger, but now I see that yoga can do that for me, too. It's just a lot slower. 
• Loved the line dancing! it causes too much of an after-work rush, though. 
• Loved the sailing! To really get into it feels too much like a lifestyle choice, though, and not a direction I want to go in right now. I have found a friend with a sailboat, though, who is looking for people to join him on the water now and then. Cool! This would give a lot more purpose to any additional lessons I take.

 

3. Have fun by taking time for myself

 

Results: Pretty good!

• Consistent.
• This feels like a habit now.

What I"ve learned

• It only take a few minutes to make a difference. The long way home, an extra swing through the yacht harbor, getting off the road at the Summit. 
• Anything counts - volunteering to go to the grocery store is right in there with a 7-mile solo hike. 

 

Power word: Bravery

 

Yep. Definitely needed that power word. I used it throughout the year, and it got me through many a sticky situation. 

 

Summary

 

Fair-to-middlin'. I found myself saying 'No' to a lot of things that just weren't going to be much fun, and definitely felt better for it. Drank too much of everything, and ate too much garbage, but rediscovered hiking and tried out a few other activities. Learned some things about myself, and what I really enjoy and want to do more of. 

 

Total Grade: B-