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elizevdmerwe

elizevdmerwe - Keep On Keeping On

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18 hours ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

I'm glad you are safe. I hope y'all can get out of there soon.

Thanks me too... me too. Brandt is very stressed about this. He went to his friend to talk some more, but their plans are also up in the air. I think the main thoughts are to watch and see what happens with the elections in May. There are a new political group rising (good for us/the country), and a lot of other human rights/Afrikaans/semi-political groups are standing up and supporting people (any race) and taking on the political groups that are discriminating and violent. If the ANC and their joining group just gets less than 50% majority, there is hope for South Africa. Otherwise... not so much.

17 hours ago, TGP said:

wow.

the Lord is keeping you safe.  stick tight to those taxi's.

 

my wife lived in Los Angelos, California once and had a moment where a gang of black people tried to surround the car  (this was back in time when LA has some famous riots)

 

she blasted the car's horn and drove away.  her passenger was Like , What if you had run someone over...?

 

Whatever it takes to be safe.

He is good! He is definitely our Protector.

I actually don't have a problem with taxi's because you know what to expect. Yes they start a lot of violent protests as well, and 80% of them, drive like... not good; but you know what to expect, and if you refuse to give them leeway on the road when they are driving on the wrong side or overtaking where they shouldn't, etc. then they actually laugh and back up, most of them anyway. They are also, more often than not, the guys who give you a space in traffic. But that is a bit of a risk that you take as well. If you get the wrong one, then you are in trouble.

 

Oh my word, I totally understand how your wife felt. Here we frequently have to drive through throngs of people who cross the street willy-nilly or just plain walk in the street, not on the side walk, etc. Luckily they aren't protesting, or I wouldn't be driving there. Nowadays you have to be careful even on the highways if you see groups of people gathered on the side, especially teenagers and young adults (16-23yrs+-). They tend to throw rocks at passing vehicles. So everywhere you go you have to be vigilant.

 

-----------------------------------------------------

Not much of anything happened Friday. School the morning where I got the idea to use Minecraft for history. We started on first people in South Africa (the unbiased, unpolitical truth) so I had the boys build San/Khoikhoi huts, make caves, and use signs as cave drawings. Minecraft has bows and arrows, and they improvised for spears. Also some cattle and sheep, which they had to put in an enclosed field (kraal in Afrikaans, can't remember the English word now), so they don't wander all over. The Khoikhoi were nomadic herders. The boys had such good ideas on what and how to make things. I gave them the basics of what I had in mind, and how I wanted them to "keep things about a topic" together, they did the rest. We looked up some things on the internet so they could see what it looked like. That was followed up by a sail ship (very basic), and signs on the 'beach' with the names of the first European explorers who had landed somewhere on the coasts of southern Africa (1488-1510). Well, the three main known explorers (Dias, da Gama, and a Portugese under-king who was killed due to a misunderstanding during trade with the Hottentotte - another name for a different Khoikhoi tribe). Next up will be Jan van Riebeeck from the Netherlands, etc. Won't bore you with the actual history, but hey, if a mom isn't strong on history herself, then she has to be clever. The boys loved it. And I'm re-learning history myself. Last year I also laminated small pictures for the wall map, and I stuck those pertaining to what we've learned on there as well. It is really great to be able to go over to the country or world map, and look up where you are reading about.

 

After lunch we had our hair cut, then drove out to a butchery on the outskirts of town which had amazing specials. A huge, huge piece of filet steak (tenderloin?) for the ridiculous price of R175/kg ($12/Lb about?). I get the pets' meat there as well. They have great quality (pets and people meat :D ), so the drive is absolutely worth it. Then one more stop before we got home around 16h40. I started making dinner (steak and salads), fed the pets, cleaned up the kitchen, etc. and then... started playing Jurassic World Evolution on the pc. :D We bought the game for Adam for his birthday last year. I'm happy to report that I can keep a small island (Isla Matanceros) happy and financially very viable. For now. After finishing the cushions today, I'll tackle island nr.2, Isla Muerta (I think, not sure).

 

We finally have the sun properly showing it's face today, and we've basically decided to have a relaxed day at home. Tomorrow Brandt has to marshal for the first time this year.

 

Week 1: Friday-

1. Exercises

  • Strength: None, overslept Friday morning. Was very tired.
  • Walking: None, was out most afternoon, and it started raining when we got home.

2. Dry Fire: Wednesday - done

3. Water: More than one bottle.

4. Sleep: Went to bed very, very late, or early, depending on your perspective. May I blame Jurassic World Evolution? :D Nah, my choice.

5. Finances

  • Dailies: None
  • Monthlies: None

6. Tidy a Room: Nothing.

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Phew so glad to hear about you having avoided ending up in that march!! As you say, if the taxis don't consider it safe, nobody in their right mind should take any risks. I really really hope the elections finally bring a turnaround for the whole country.

 

And yay to immigration plans taking such shape now, I hear you on it no way being a definite, but it's so much easier to prepare for something than to just ponder and wonder and worry... could imagine the boys (and all of you) gaining most wonderful experiences in any case. All of you are so great in being there for one another! I keep marveling at all you do :wub:

 

Haha, and then you call it "Nothing much happened" :lol: noooo, you just keep your routine up during the most challenging time, prepare for a major life shift, keep your family safe and fed, even create new cushions and stunning bed covers.... nothing much at all :P 

 

Hope you get enough rest in between dear Elize!

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3 hours ago, lucky fire dragon said:

but it's so much easier to prepare for something than to just ponder and wonder and worry... could imagine the boys (and all of you) gaining most wonderful experiences in any case.

It really is nice to read about "other options", but like today when I read an article to Brandt, I wanted to cry. I'm receiving a weekly newsletter from that immigration agency that Brandt's friends are using, and I just casually asked Brandt whether he's read the article, as I forward it to him every week. He asked me to do this. He said no, took his headphones off and waited for me to read the article (which became two). This family (with two teens high school age) had immigrated from Cape area to NZ in January. The lady made no secret of having gone through difficult times with kids, house, finances, etc. but the one thing that hit me, which choked me up was this section:

Quote

 

We didn't leave South Africa because of the crime, in fact I don't think any of us truly appreciated how bad it really was until we came here - but it one of the reasons we won't be going back. ... Since we have left, it has opened our eyes to how we really lived, often fearful but largely shrugging it off - our life was like everyones life so surely it was ‘normal’?

I look out now into my garden in Ashburton, there are no bars on any windows, no security gates, no alarms, beams, razor wire or high walls. The sliding doors are only closed when the bumblebees are wafting in from the lavender outside and we sleep with doors and windows unlocked and wide open in the summer. 

 

And then she goes on about other things in the country. The frustration and anxiety of getting things done here in South Africa (like me and the certificates), compared to there where even the bank clerks are in the open, not behind bullet proof glass with a couple holes for talking.

The second article was on taking your retired parents with to NZ. How some officials are seeing it as a financial drain on the country, while others saw the value of these experienced older people, who help and work in various areas. Both articles made no effort to hide difficulties that may be faced, which made it balanced with regards to real expectations in my eyes.

 

The only problem I see with reading about NZ, planning and doing things is that I have to fight not to become too negative about South Africa. Not to become too unhappy/upset with life here and how things are, compared to how it possibly could be over there. That thing of the grass is greener on the other side? You still need to try and see the green grass on this side too.

 

3 hours ago, lucky fire dragon said:

 

Haha, and then you call it "Nothing much happened" :lol: noooo, you just keep your routine up during the most challenging time, prepare for a major life shift, keep your family safe and fed, even create new cushions and stunning bed covers.... nothing much at all :P 

*blush* well if you put it that way, I did manage to do some things, but not all the things of the challenge. Thanks for lifting my spirits in that regard :)

And for today, I really did nothing other than normal house chores, lunch, and reading a lot of internet articles, NF threads, etc. I didn't even play JWE! So definitely getting enough rest in :D

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2 hours ago, elizevdmerwe said:

The only problem I see with reading about NZ, planning and doing things is that I have to fight not to become too negative about South Africa. Not to become too unhappy/upset with life here and how things are, compared to how it possibly could be over there. That thing of the grass is greener on the other side? You still need to try and see the green grass on this side too.

 

Shame, I can see the challenge in that big time. But you have a strong habit on looking for the good, I am sure that will help to some extent at least. It's good to acknowledge your feelings however and maybe it's the eye opener that will help you go through the harder parts of actually making the move. All I can think of is to keep breathing, trust in the larger good and beauty of life and trust that it may guide you all safely to more happiness.

 

Good job on having a restful day :) Keep at it :D 

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wow. I agree with others that you are doing amazing.

 

is it pretty well established that your immigrating?  I wasn't sure you made that decision yet...

 

for what its worth; I agree what you quoted.

there's little of that here in my part of Rural USA, either.   but its a big decision.

 

Just saying'

one of my favorite singers in Roger Whittaker, he is old school  (I think he most famous days when in the 1980's) but famously from South African. totally white and I thought a wonderful ambassador of the culture of South Africa.  (do you know of him?)

 

...not to get on any soap box;

but every where in the world seems so much more divided, intolerant and upset than they used to.  

 

that what I like SO much about this website.  a forum of encouragement, good cheer, and friendship in an otherwise unfriendly internet.  I hope you are having a good weekend.

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I think you have a great attitude about where you live, and dealing with the unknowns of possibly immigrating.

 

I learned so much history when I taught my son. Not sure if they didn't teach it much when I was younger, or I wasn't listening, but so much of what I learned was new to me. Thankfully, my son remembers most of what he learned.

 

I love the material for the covers

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22 hours ago, lucky fire dragon said:

 

Shame, I can see the challenge in that big time. But you have a strong habit on looking for the good, I am sure that will help to some extent at least. It's good to acknowledge your feelings however and maybe it's the eye opener that will help you go through the harder parts of actually making the move. All I can think of is to keep breathing, trust in the larger good and beauty of life and trust that it may guide you all safely to more happiness.

 

Good job on having a restful day :) Keep at it :D 

Brandt and I talked a bit more on the subject, but his reactions are so mixed that there is really no clue whether he is pro or against. South Africa is a great country, it's just her leaders. Everyone, from every race, is struggling and lives in fear to some extend, but it is so 'everyday' that it seems normal. You don't realise that it is not supposed to be like that. We as white people just have the added fear that there are definitely groups out there 'gunning' for us. Their chants are not idle threats. But otherwise everyone is basically in the same boat.

21 hours ago, TGP said:

is it pretty well established that your immigrating?  I wasn't sure you made that decision yet...

No, we're still talking and Brandt is thinking about it. Every now and again he starts asking questions and discusses things, otherwise I keep quiet about it here at home. But it is definitely at the front of our thoughts every single day. After our to and thro yesterday where he asked more questions and discussed things he'd learned on the internet about NZ, I felt a lot more positive that the chance is good that we will eventually move. He said that the only negative thing he could see was with regards to his mom. Her reaction if we decide to move; would she be willing to go with? Otherwise would she be willing to visit? I assured him his mom will find a way to visit us if we lived in NZ. Or we Skype regularly. And we almost never see other family anyway. We chat via Whatsapp, or Fb. most of the time, and we phone them on their birthdays. We maybe see his brother and his wife and son every two, three years if we end up visiting his mom at the same time. Otherwise his brother only contacts Brandt with his birthday. My mom won't be able to go over (I did consider it, because she is my mom), because she will be seen as a 'drain on the country' as she doesn't have a private pension, and needs to be in a home with with special care, AND with her condition as it is now, it would be terribly upsetting for her to move again.

 

Brandt just got home now and he asked more questions and there are some things that I have to look up for him, specifically w.r.t. his age and citizenship.

21 hours ago, TGP said:

Just saying'

one of my favorite singers in Roger Whittaker, he is old school  (I think he most famous days when in the 1980's) but famously from South African. totally white and I thought a wonderful ambassador of the culture of South Africa.  (do you know of him?)

I know of him. I was a child (6-10yrs old) when he was a singer. I know some of his songs like Mammy Blue, I don't believe in if anymore, and there is another one that I can't remember the name of. You got me curious again and I looked up his information on Wikipedia. He was born and raised in Kenya, up north in Africa. He only moved to South Africa when he had to study. I believe he lives in the UK/Ireland currently? His words with regards to what happened to his parents...

Quote

"It will affect me for the rest of my life, but I believe we should all live without hate if we can"

... sums up how we feel about the situation in the country.

21 hours ago, TGP said:

...not to get on any soap box;

but every where in the world seems so much more divided, intolerant and upset than they used to. 

I mentioned it before. There isn't a country that doesn't have their own problems, but it depends on what you are willing to handle. Sign of the times?

21 hours ago, TGP said:

that what I like SO much about this website.  a forum of encouragement, good cheer, and friendship in an otherwise unfriendly internet.  I hope you are having a good weekend.

Yes, totally. I don't know where I would have been without my friends here :love_heart:

20 hours ago, Elastigirl said:

I think you have a great attitude about where you live, and dealing with the unknowns of possibly immigrating.

I love my country. I don't think it will ever change, no matter where I live. But I also see how things have gone through the years, and maybe things happened for the reason that other things will happen in the future, and then, because of your past, the future doesn't seem quite as daunting. Does that make sense? For instance me moving so much as child and adult - the possibility of having to move doesn't scare me, just all the other arrangements around that, seems a bit much.

20 hours ago, Elastigirl said:

I learned so much history when I taught my son. Not sure if they didn't teach it much when I was younger, or I wasn't listening, but so much of what I learned was new to me. Thankfully, my son remembers most of what he learned.

I know I was taught history (local and international to some extend, and industrial revolution) in school, but I can honestly only remember a little bit. Much of what I read up on putting together that SA History work for the boys triggered memories of what we were taught. I'm lucky that what we were taught up until the then government (around 1985-1990 - Apartheid era) was very accurate. That government ideology/history part was obviously not written then, so I as child didn't know what the situation was. Reading up on SA history did trigger a forgotten memory of me as child (maybe 10yrs old?) standing close to a shop window where my granny worked, looking out on the street, and one of the bombs that the ANC had planted in the city had gone off further down the street. Far enough away from where I stood that the window only cracked from the shock wave. It didn't break. I can't remember anything after that.

I also remember one history lesson where the poor teacher tried to teach us how to learn facts. She used numbers for specific things. I remember 4 was for improvement in ship building, during the industrial revolution. 4 -> sails -> boats/ships. Otherwise I'm really re-learning most history with the boys.

20 hours ago, Elastigirl said:

I love the material for the covers

That material was only for the bed cover, but I'm glad you like it :). I finished the dining room chairs' cushions today! Tada! I'm quite happy with how they came out. Here is a group of them together.

WP_20190217_001.thumb.jpg.ba32d040e5586cd79aac0e19eff4d19c.jpg

 

And one chair with it's cushion/pillow. And it is comfy too.

WP_20190217_004.thumb.jpg.128539d5370b62697630b8d8b08f438d.jpg

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Brandt and I talked a lot more on the moving issue last night and this morning. Needless to say I didn't do bible study or exercise this morning.

A bit of Dear Diary...

Spoiler

 

I had a paragraph here about our feelings and discussions, but going to skip over that. Main issues:

  • Our current "normal" w.r.t. safety isn't an issue to him, it is to me.
  • Job security for him is a serious issue due to policies the government has implemented during January and February;
  • A possible successful future for the boys, not just getting by, is a serious issue due to policies/law the government is busy or trying to implement as well.
  • Everything we have to leave behind (family and friends, house, possible pets...).

So... We completed that Preliminary Evaluation questionnaire from the immigration agency last night (for which I also had to update and hand in his CV), and received an answer this morning! In short, they basically confirmed everything I've read and told Brandt already. Even the type of visa I thought he could apply for, if he has a job there, and for us to immigrate he should really have a job first. Due to costs (among other things) we won't make use of their services just yet.

 

I told Brandt my honest thoughts are that because of his age, and the time the whole process can take, we don't have much more time to make a final decision, if we want Permanent Residency or Citizenship. If he is serious about it, we should really start to get on with it properly. Not just half-assed (sorry for the word) attempts and then shrug our shoulders. He can always say no to job offers and we can then not make the move, if it comes down to it. But then at least we know where we stand; we will have something concrete to make decisions on. And I support him, always, no matter what his final decision.

 

I also mentioned to him that if we were there, he could always study mechanics part time, and go into the car-fixing industry, which he has grown to like a lot. There is a great demand in that field. As well as anything building, carpentry, metal works... I wonder if he doesn't have a bit of insecurity about his qualifications and putting himself "out there". Here he is seen as a senior in his field with a vast amount of experience and knowledge. There... we just don't know. It will mean starting over again, maybe a bit higher on the ladder than rock bottom, but still.

 

 

The final decision: I have to hand in his CV at the various job agencies listed on the NZ immigration site today, and then we'll take it from there.

Edited by elizevdmerwe
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Hi Elize! Glad that you and Brandt are continuing to talk through the immigration stuff. Don't ever feel bad about "Dear Diary". We're here to be your support and sounding board. *hugs*

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3 hours ago, annyshay said:

Hi Elize! Glad that you and Brandt are continuing to talk through the immigration stuff. Don't ever feel bad about "Dear Diary". We're here to be your support and sounding board. *hugs*

So glad you are back safe and sound. Thanks Shannon, I really appreciate it. *hugs*

I added his CV and profile to three sites, then sent him the links via email so he can go through it. I just don't do "computer" speak anymore. It's not my lingo :D He had more questions, like what happens to the boys and I if he should die before we have residency there. Otherwise he seems actually a bit more relaxed since he made the CV decision this morning before work.

 

I'm really tired tonight due to all the late evenings this weekend. The boys and I all have sinus because today was the first day that Eric could mow our lawn in nearly three weeks, due to rain and storms. But it was a glorious, not too hot, sunny day. Autumn is definitely in the air.

Edited by elizevdmerwe
fixed spelling
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Week 2: Monday & Tuesday-

1. Exercises

  • Strength: Monday - none; Tuesday - some: I mixed things up, did what I felt like doing.
    • Joint Circles warm up
    • Goblet Squat - 3x10 @ 10kg
    • Knee Push ups - 3x10
    • Russian Twist w. Cycle - 3x10 @10kg
    • Stretches
  • Walking: None.

2. Dry Fire: Wednesday - ???

3. Water: Monday - 1x bottle, Tuesday - not enough.

4. Sleep: Monday - Early around 21h00; Tuesday - not so much.

5. Finances

  • Dailies: None formally on the budget spreadsheet.
  • Monthlies: None formally again. Did forms and signatures for tax, but not much.

6. Tidy a Room: Tidied a bit in the kitchen's pantry space. I think I'm not touching the boys' room any further until we know what we want to do (moving or not). It is actually neat and tidy for most part.

 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

More sinus for the boys and I due to the gardener across the road burning all kinds of rubbish again. I can understand why the tenants there had told him to do it, but it doesn't make it legal or nice for us to have to close all windows and doors, and still have everything smell like thick, stinky smoke. Oh yeah, he did it because ... our municipality workers who do the refuse removal, and other city work (fixing water pipes, cleaning streets, etc.) are all on a strike, and have blocked off the municipal (and smaller dumps around town), throwing stuff at people who dared take their own rubbish and garden clippings, etc. to the various dumps. These people are on high salaries with a LOT of extras, so we don't feel sympathy for them. They just keep wanting more and more, and do less, and less. Our refuse bags haven't been removed (city wide) for almost three weeks now. Anyway... so that is why the guy across the road gave his gardener instructions to burn things, and why I sat with a dull headache from last night.

 

Our "old faithful" coffee filter machine has been put to rest. The plastic around the heated plate has started melting and has become a bit of a fire risk. We have another one, a bit newer and less used, but it doesn't have a permanent filter, so we are back to using that big, fancy machine Brandt bought for me year before last. The one that is difficult to clean. I've got a little cup with earbuds and toothpicks behind it now to clean out those irritating corners where a cloth just can't get into.

 

Uhhmmm... w.r.t. emigrating... let me just check what I've said before... Dear Diary emotional warning...
 

Spoiler

 

A bit of a back and thro with the guy from the immigration agency. He told us in no uncertain terms that Brandt/we have to be very sure that immigrating is what we want to do, because once we make that decision, it will take 150% effort, and more if we can spare it, to get things done, settled in and adjust. He said the stress on marriages and people are very high, and some marriages even end up in divorce. He wants us to have the formal assessment with him via Skype because "there are more than one possibility" of how we can emigrate, each with their own set of requirements, etc. But he is fully booked until end of March at this stage. Brandt is at the moment against talking to him for this formal assessment. He wants more time to make sure of his decision, and he wants to first receive our papers, and at least our passports, because he says there is no way that anything is going to happen without those anyway. And if what the guy says is true, that we can apply for residency and then permanent residency within a couple of months after arriving, that his age isn't a problem, then we have a little bit more time.

 

I've updated and added his CV as much as I could on various sites and LinkedIn, as per his request. LinkedIn is one chaotic, not very user-friendly place! I set out points that Brandt had to look at in an email and discussed it with him last night, and he already received notifications that there were 3+ jobs available in his line of work. I forwarded an email in that regard to him. Then... this morning... he turned around and asked me to go through LinkedIn and these emails and decide whether he should apply for them or not. I told him there is absolutely no way that I can do that for him. I'm not the one doing the work, I may have a computer background and studied for a diploma in the same field, but I have no idea what languages, scripting, etc. is being used currently. Heck I only heard about JSON two weeks ago while listening to Brandt and H discuss the various ways of implementing it compared to HTML which I know. I have no idea what he can, or can't do. I have no idea what it took to write the software for the various clients! And I concluded that if he wasn't prepared to look at the jobs himself, then we stop this train right here. He cannot and will not dump unnecessary stuff on me. If we do this, he needs to do what he needs to do. I will have more than enough other responsibilities which I'll take upon myself to spare him unnecessary hassles. He quietly turned around, sat down, went through Linkedin and another job site.

 

While washing dishes a bit later on (still early before he had to leave for work), I called him over to please come and talk to me. Which he did. I told him I want more than just the bare information from him about this whole situation. So he talked! Nothing new really. The long and the short: he is more than willing to fight and die here, and not worry about it, if it comes to that. If he dies here in South Africa, then the boys and I are taken care of financially, no hassles as his life policy is more than enough to look after us comfortably. But... he knows I am not happy about the safety situation, and he knows I would rather not have to fight and kill people, if it comes down to it. Never mind the impact on the boys of that kind of situation. And then we are in a situation in this country, without him... you see how it unfolds. [My thoughts-Compared to what we've come to know about how NZ is. My point is why live in this fear and uncertainty, when we can live somewhere else, not like this! Doesn't matter where we are, we are going to have to budget and work things out carefully, as we have always been doing. Yes, here we have a bit more loose cash than we will probably have in NZ, but there are opportunities and other things that we don't have here, especially for a family, which will help save on costs.] The one unexpected thing he mentioned was that when he saw A again over the weekend (race car related), A said that they might actually not go to NZ now, as his wife got a good 2nd contract, but also their kids are all grown up and here. Can't or won't move. He did however tell Brandt that his honest opinion for us as family, was to serious consider going, especially because of the boys!

 

Brandt's thoughts: He can easily adjust and enjoy it in NZ. The more he finds out, through reading and talking, the more he thinks he'll love it there. But how will the stress and things impact us as family? And his mom... I told him over the weekend that as much respect as I have for his feelings (love and responsibility) towards his mom, and as much as I love her myself; if I have to choose between making her happy, and having my boys happy and safe; she doesn't stand a chance. I am more than willing to try and get her to go with us to NZ, even if she has to live with us there.

 

Just before he cycled to work we discussed more on the current political situation, and he acknowledged that every single day, more and more information are coming out about just what plans the current government have for this country. Never mind for the white people. For all the people. It is really bad decisions, and they are not willing to listen to people with experience and knowledge. They think they know better. He was hoping for a miracle, and he just wants to make sure that if we move, and once again something happens to him there, that the boys and I will truly be better off there, in the unknown, rather than here, in the not-so-safe, but very well known situation. I respect him for that.

 

While I was on Fb yesterday, looking through information about emigrating with pets to NZ, a lady I know contacted me via pm. They are also home schoolers and she previously bought books through me. She saw my enquiry on the group. They are moving to the Netherlands this coming March/April. Her husband had been head hunted and has been working there since January. She and the kids are going a bit later. She said to be careful whom I spoke to about moving in the HS community, but wanted to encourage me if that is really what we want to do. There are apparently just in her HS community a lot of families (all races) already in the planning stages of moving to various countries.

 

The overall feeling I get from reading about politics, the plans, policies and new law being implemented, just the general situation country-wide, is that people (like us) have been holding out, and hoping and wishing for a miracle for this country, and a majority of us are coming to the conclusion that it isn't going to happen.

 

 

I'm struggling to get to everything I should get to. I'm trying to stay with the challenge as much as I can, but as things are working out at this moment, this week, I start late with school work, and then after that there is just enough time to get the bare minimum done. I fit in what I can, where I can. At least I can still walk during Lego, and the weather is turning nice and sunny, not wet and rainy anymore. So I have breaks, and relatively 'stress free' times in my schedule like walking on Wednesdays, etc.

 

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I'm so sorry that there is so much stress in your country and in your home related to possibly moving. The in between time before a decision is made can be SO HARD. Maybe make sure you have some stoep time? Prayers coming your way for continued strength and grace and wisdom. 

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16 hours ago, annyshay said:

I'm so sorry that there is so much stress in your country and in your home related to possibly moving. The in between time before a decision is made can be SO HARD. Maybe make sure you have some stoep time? Prayers coming your way for continued strength and grace and wisdom. 

Your reminder of 'stoep time' was just what I needed. I took my mug and sat on the quiet stoep 5h45-6h00 this morning. Was fresh, but good. The slight headache I'd gotten up with went away and I could start the morning on a smile. :love_heart: Thanks for that.

 

Week 2: Wednesday-

1. Exercises

  • Strength: Not a strength day.
  • Walking: Yes! 3.8km in 36C weather. Was good, too hot, but good to feel the sun.

2. Dry Fire: Wednesday -Not early morning, as Brandt and I talked. But watched a video on handling a situation when grabbed in the street.

3. Water: 3x bottles! Did I mention it was a tad hot?!

4. Sleep: Only at 22h00, then couldn't fall asleep as it was hot and I was sweating. Couldn't lie on top of the sheets as mozzies were in kamikaze mode, even though I had a plug in the wall spreading non-love (death) their way. Also... other things, will mention below.

5. Finances

  • Dailies: None formally on the budget spreadsheet.
  • Monthlies: None formally again. Did more forms and signatures for tax.

6. Tidy a Room: Nothing

 

------------------------------------------------------

That part of my glasses where the thin metal connection goes over the bridge of my nose, is giving me a reaction. I had a small blister there (usually I get this as an allergic reaction like with gold plated things), which I unconsciously scratched, and now I have a sore. I'm trying to wear my glasses as little as possible, which might be contributing to the low grade headaches.

 

Sleep: Not a lot of it last night. A bit late in bed finishing things off (clean kitchen, dishwasher, food to defrost for next day, etc.). Then couldn't sleep because of mozzies and heat. Then woke up a couple times due to our dogs growling, then barking, and the neighbourhood dogs barking, and early morning, around 2h30-3h00, Adam shouted us awake. He woke up from sounds by the car which is parked in front of our bedrooms (under car port). Brandt and I was up and around switching lights on and checking through the windows. Eventually B went out. There was nothing. When he asked Adam this morning exactly what he'd heard, he immediately went to the car door and tried the handle. That click-sound it makes when the car is locked and you let go of the handle, that was what he heard repeatedly last night. Unfortunately the car is on gravel so we can't check for footprints. But coupled with the dogs' reactions last night, there might have been an opportunistic 'visitor'. It could have been sound carrying from other properties, as well.

 

Finances: I got email about one of his investments this morning, and it made me realise/remember some things. I told him - if something happened to him according to his scenario from the other day - that his life policy would pay me out handsomely and that would be enough for me to actually apply for residency with the boys as an investment. Not to mention, that if we kept his annuities, and we kept our life policies all in place, and we just use the other investment-savings plans' money if we move to NZ, we can start off a lot stronger. Not be in such dire straights as is usual for a lot of people, apparently. He gave me this funny look and said he didn't think about that before either. I told him that of course we'd first have to talk to our broker and see just how much money we are talking about here, and then clear it out with the immigration agent, to know whether it is a plausible idea... but... it definitely lifted his spirits. He went to work smiling.

 

I spoke about possibly moving to NZ with Dy at Lego yesterday, while the boys were swimming after their Lego lesson. She is at the moment, other than you guys, the only real friend I trust to speak to about such things. And she is a born again Christian, so she sees things out of that perspective. She listened patiently and then turned around and asked whether I've considered that God is drawing us to NZ, because that is exactly what it sounded like to her. I got a serious case of goosebumps all over my body. I was gobsmacked. My first thoughts were: "Off course! That makes a lot of sense". My second thoughts were that I couldn't give that as a reason to Brandt, because he just doesn't understand that, and just doesn't think along those lines at all, even though I did tell him that it seems to me that a lot of past experiences have been leading us to this point. Make it easier for us to handle such a change. Dy and I chatted a bit more about her stuff, and just before she started her next lesson, she turned to me again and expressed how strongly she felt that God is calling us to NZ, and certain bible verses kept coming to mind that we can plan the way, but God will direct the path. God is in control, we just need to trust and be patient. That immediately put me at ease, and I was able for the first time in nearly two weeks, to relax last night and read and just enjoy it. I put moving totally out of my mind. I didn't speak to Brandt about this or NZ or anything; I could just "let go" of that stress.

 

Then of course our nightly wake up call, and this morning after Brandt spoke to Adam ... reality and decisions and choices hit me in the face again, but I'm really trying not to let it take over my thoughts. Brandt got an email with possible work he could apply for, but nothing that he specifically mentioned to me.

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that was a beautiful experience! ty for sharing it.

I strongly feel that if god wants you in NZ, you will find a way.  

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Glad you were reminded that God is in control, and He will direct your paths.

 

Interesting about your glasses. I've been wearing reading glasses for a while now. And suddenly I had a sore spot on my nose. I wondered since I've worn glasses for a bit. I have a couple pair, one with plastic , and one is metal. I'll pay attention and see if one o those might be the problem.  

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On 2/21/2019 at 2:04 PM, TGP said:

that was a beautiful experience! ty for sharing it.

I strongly feel that if god wants you in NZ, you will find a way.  

:love_heart:

On 2/22/2019 at 4:58 AM, Elastigirl said:

Glad you were reminded that God is in control, and He will direct your paths.

To both TGP and EG: yes, it was a shake-up to remember that God is in control, and I have to put things in His hands. I'm trying. I'm honestly very eager to go. I see all the difficulties lying ahead, but ...

On 2/21/2019 at 2:18 PM, annyshay said:

SO GLAD that I could help. :)

:love_heart:

On 2/22/2019 at 4:58 AM, Elastigirl said:

Interesting about your glasses. I've been wearing reading glasses for a while now. And suddenly I had a sore spot on my nose. I wondered since I've worn glasses for a bit. I have a couple pair, one with plastic , and one is metal. I'll pay attention and see if one o those might be the problem.

I think those two nose-protectors, the little arms with the plastic nose-thingies, got pushed closer to the glasses, and thus the bridge was pressing against my nose bridge. I pulled them away a bit and it is much better. Although these are multi-focal, so I can't adjust too much. But at least it isn't touching my skin anymore.

 

-----------------------------------------------------------

Seriously NZ is seemingly coming up everywhere! We went to our neighbour-boys' birthday party Saturday, those neighbours we had such a good time with. Well one of the parents (single-mom of two) has her own curriculum business, and she is in the final stages of going over to NZ, to start it up there as well. They are leaving in 6 weeks' time. She spoke some to Brandt and R (neighbour) at one stage. While helping to pack and clean up, after most of the people have left, R came to me and asked my opinion about immigrating. I told him.

 

I haven't done much throughout week 2 for this challenge. I'm starting week 3 with a shark visit, but I've got some energy back and actually feel like doing things! I managed to complete ALL THE FINANCES up till end of January. I'll only receive the final bank statement for Feb, around middle March. I've sent the docs on to Brandt's mom, now she has to do her magic and she and the accountant can do the final tax papers.

 

Two weeks then we are going to the Cape. We are so looking forward to it, but I have to change accommodation again! This time due to Brandt's brother and his wife having decided they want to stay one more day. We have had beautiful sunny/hot days, then thunderstorms at night, so internet was off a lot of the time since Thursday. Also some load shedding, or storm-load-shedding.

 

So not much news. Let's see what I can manage to do with the rest of week 3.

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Our neighbour on the other side just let me know that her husband just got an offer and they are definitely going to NZ as soon as possible! She saw my name on the NZ Fb group last night.
Man, it is starting to feel like "rats leaving the sinking ship".

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well, maybe they are the 'smart rats' :)

... I know god will protect you and your family.  Hope you had a good weekend.

 

so your leaving for the cape mid March?  that's very cool.  I don't know if you've said, but is there a lot of sight-seeing on this kind of trip; or is it mostly catching up with family??

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7 hours ago, elizevdmerwe said:

Our neighbour on the other side just let me know that her husband just got an offer and they are definitely going to NZ as soon as possible! She saw my name on the NZ Fb group last night.
Man, it is starting to feel like "rats leaving the sinking ship".

 

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13 minutes ago, TGP said:

well, maybe they are the 'smart rats' :)

... I know god will protect you and your family.  Hope you had a good weekend.

I meant it in a good way, yes, not bad. This basically means a "brain drain" for the country though, which leaves me feeling very sad. The words "moving" and "emigrating" are probably just catching my attention at the moment because it is in the fore front of my mind. But it really seems as if I'm picking it up everywhere I turn. Our neighbour also gave me contact information for an immigration agency which is a lot cheaper than the one we had looked at, and this new place has a very good reputation as well. From comments Brandt has made I think we are definitely going to try our best to get to NZ, but he hasn't said it in so many words, as yet. I forwarded quite a number of job adds to him. Maybe something catches his eye ;)

19 minutes ago, TGP said:

... I know god will protect you and your family.  Hope you had a good weekend. 

Thank you, yes He will. Things always work out for the best, even if it isn't what we planned, or expected.

I had a good, quiet-ish weekend, thanks. It was supposed to be club shoot on Sunday, but there had been so much rain all over the area, that we decided Sunday morning to stay at home. As we heard later, all the 'normal' cars (sedans in other words, low to the ground), got stuck in the mud and had to be pulled out. So a lot of time to work on those finances, in between all the rain storms and thunder. Even got some 'SWAT' episodes in.

23 minutes ago, TGP said:

so your leaving for the cape mid March?  that's very cool.  I don't know if you've said, but is there a lot of sight-seeing on this kind of trip; or is it mostly catching up with family??

Next Friday (8 March) we are flying down, and that following Monday (11 March) we are flying back. We'll leave our car at the airport long-stay parking as they have guards, so the chances of it being stolen or broken into are minimal. We are meeting Brandt's mom in the Cape for her 21st Argus cycling race. Normally we try to fit something in the line of sight-seeing into any trip we make, but because it is such a short time (Saturday and Sunday), and it is going to be so busy due to the cycling (thousands of extra people in the city), I'm not sure whether we'd be able to. Brandt's mom asked us whether we would still like to visit the Castle, as she also wants to go and see it.

 

So yes, firstly we would like to visit the Castle of Good Hope, which is where the first settlers landed, traded ground with the Khoi-Khoi, and then "started" Cape Town, in 1652. And one other place the boys and I would love to visit is a working archeological dig site (dinosaurs!) out of town, up north on the western coast of the Cape. It is a part of our country that we've never been to. For us both places would fall into part of their home schooling curriculum, like a school tour. The dig site is important to us, as Adam still considers paleontology as a possible future job, and we thought it would be great if he could see archeologists/paleontologists in action. I know there are still years ahead before he has to choose a career direction, but we don't know when (if ever) we'll have the chance to be in that part of the country again.

 

The only down point for us, is that Brandt's brother and wife would most probably want to come along, but they never pay for anything themselves, and they always make snarky comments. As it is we had to rent a bigger vehicle to accommodate the whole family, while we are down there. As I said, Brandt's mom is also eager to visit the Castle, so we will only have Saturday to do that. She isn't really interested in the dinosaurs though, so I suggested to Brandt that we go there on Sunday, while she cycles. Brandt will drop her off and fetch her that afternoon again, after she'd finished her race. I don't have a problem taking his brother's son with us to the dig site, if he is interested. We took him with to the Graskop Glass Lift, which went down into the forested canyon last July. I had to make my voice stern once or twice, but for most part he is a good boy.

 

M.i.l. also promised Rocco cake and milkshake for his birthday, while down there. His birthday is only the day after we return home, but due to us going down, we won't be able to have a party for him. So that will also have to happen on the Saturday.

 

So I don't know how things will turn out. Part of me wants to be stubborn, but another part says: good riddance, just get through the weekend.

 

25 minutes ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

 

Yip, that sums it up. :D

 

--------------------------------------------------------

We ordered Rocco's birthday present. As I mentioned to TGP ^^^, the day after we return from the Cape, will be Rocco's 10th birthday. He settled for Skylander characters, and a morning at Blast Trampoline Park. And of course ouma (granny) promised him cake and milkshake, at a coffee shop down in the Cape. So he thinks the world is quite grand at the moment.

 

I tried to have a 'stoep morning' this morning, but didn't get to it. Did spend time on the stoep later, while reading our bible story for the morning (Daniel still), and doing Afrikaans and math with the boys. Then we got smoked out, or in, again. Slight headache due to that smoke. Nothing much out of the ordinary on the calendar for this week. Brandt has his first rally to marshal down the south coast this coming weekend. He'll be leaving Friday evening, and returning either Saturday evening, or Sunday morning.

 

Oh, and he looked up old 2nd hand cars in NZ, and got very excited about rear-wheel-drive cars available there. And how good the rallying is East of Down Under. Now I'm going to relax with a nice action-romance book!

:loyal:  Have a good week.

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Week 3: Up to Tuesday-

1. Exercises

  • Strength: No shark week - had a hard time.
  • Walking: Not yet.

2. Dry Fire: Wednesday.

3. Water: Yes, at least 1 bottle, Tue- 2x bottles?

4. Sleep: Monday on time, Tuesday, around 22h00. Was then wide awake. Got up around 23h30-24h00 because of aggressive barking by our dogs. Brandt was in front with earphones on, but he heard it over the very loud music he was listening to. Don't know what it was outside. Dogs ran out, ran around, came back soon, calmed down. Probably a cat?

5. Finances

  • Dailies: Up to date.
  • Monthlies: DONE!

6. Tidy a Room: Nothing more. Have some more clothes to fix, caravan pillow to make, and then Rocco's t-shirt to draw.

 

 

------------------------------------------------------------

I think Brandt is a bit overwhelmed with how much info are coming in from people around us, w.r.t. NZ. I tried to update him on applying for passports last night, and he sort of growled at me, then started playing games on XBox. I left him alone. Later when I said good night, he gave me this funny, enquiring look. I just said good night and went to bed. This morning he asked me about the passports applications, and the bank we want to get it through. Doing it through Home Affairs is a nightmare. Some banks are now linked to their databases, and are helping to lighten the load for ID and passport applications/renewals. Unfortunately there are only a handful of banks in the country doing it. It would mean he has to take three days off to drive to Gauteng province (1st day - 6 to 7 hrs drive), get to the bank and go through the process (2nd day - 1-2 hrs in traffic, then ??? hrs in the bank as per appointment), then drive back (3rd day 6-7hrs again). Then do it all over again when we have to fetch the documents again. We literally only have to go to the bank the first time to have biometric scans done (eyes, fingerprints, etc.), as I can apply and hand everything in online.

 

He received a lot of emails yesterday w.r.t. job opportunities, which I'd forwarded to him. Most of them want the person to already have a work visa and be in NZ, before applying though. I mentioned on the Fb group for people currently living, or wanting to move to NZ, what Brandt does, our situation (still in SA and still busy with the admin) and a job agent messaged me to say she has a job position open for Delphi software developer, on South Island, and would Brandt be interested in applying for it? I sent him text messages about it, and told her I'll get back to her as Brandt was currently at work. He was literally still cycling to work when it came through.

 

Otherwise: did the normal morning chores (kitchen, bedrooms), later washing, and had to drive to the butcher out of town to buy meat.

Oh yeah... Was nearly run over by a semi with huge trailer, who drove over the middle line in order to get around two short corners. If it wasn't for the fact that I'd seen the situation developing, and had stopped the car dead just outside the one corner, right next to the curb (concrete curb was too high to drive up onto, or I would have), he would have driven over the bonnet (engine hood?) of the Mazda! He was SO CLOSE! We have some road works on the bigger roads and road works people are sending these big trucks down lanes they aren't meant to drive in. Had another near escape, but not as close, on my way back from the butchery. Minibus taxi's were double parking in the road in front of a school, waiting to pick up kids. The truck was sent down the road. Again I saw there wasn't space for the truck and my car, so I tried to pull over as much as possible, stopped dead. He hooted at the taxi's which also wisely decided to give space. I could have touched the side of the truck, if I put my arm out the window, without having to stretch! And he was further away than the first truck was! After I started moving again, at a snail's pace, I had to jump on the brakes when a kid ran right into the road, about 2m  (6ft?) in front of the car! I hooted at him (I guess he was about Adam's size/age). Needless to say, I was a nervous wreck by the time I got home. Coffee never tasted as good.

coffe-header.jpg?w=610&h=250

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Week 3: Up to Thursday-

1. Exercises

  • Strength: Thursday - some goblet squats and pushups.
  • Walking: Wednesday - 3.9km.

2. Dry Fire: Wednesday - nothing physical. Watched lesson videos and discussed with Brandt.

3. Water: Yes, enough water both days.

4. Sleep: Wednesday on time, woke up during the night. Thursday late to bed. Slept through.

5. Finances

  • Dailies: Up to date.
  • Monthlies: DONE!

6. Tidy a Room: Nothing more.

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there is NOTHING as both alarming and a relief; at the same time; as a near car accident.

 

I'm glad to see that you are ok!

-----

about 1 week before your trip to the south.  how are you guys doing?   

 

sometimes I HATE the time Before something happens.  especially; just Days before.  I never quite feel ready for things.

 

 

 

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On 3/1/2019 at 8:57 PM, TGP said:

there is NOTHING as both alarming and a relief; at the same time; as a near car accident.

 

I'm glad to see that you are ok!

I'm used to having to be vigilant while driving, for one because of hi-jackings, or cellphone/handbag theft attempts (they break your passenger window while you are stationery, lean through and grab whatever they can), and secondly because of the way people drive over here. But three almost incidents in one day, within two hours, shook me a bit.

On 3/1/2019 at 8:57 PM, TGP said:

about 1 week before your trip to the south.  how are you guys doing?   

 

sometimes I HATE the time Before something happens.  especially; just Days before.  I never quite feel ready for things.

I'm irritated with the place we've booked accommodation! I made a final change (as per instructions from mil), and the people aren't getting back to either me or the booking agency! I do realise they are probably super busy, because of that event, but seriously, they can't answer their emails within a week!? The problem is that I've done similar work and I know what can be done, but then I also worked myself to a standstill and breaking point. So maybe they are more clever in that regard by not taking customer service so seriously. *shrug* who knows.

 

I hate this time before going somewhere because I previously had issues with people, like nonsense with Brandt's brother when we visit his mom and they were there as well, and I know that usually mil changes things and then we just have to jump in and make things work. Meaning a lot of stress and arrangements are dumped on us (Brandt and I). Which is what she did - again!, and told us about last night.

 

She told the 5 other cyclists who are from her town participating in this race, to all get together after the race, with their families, at one point (which Brandt and I have to find), so that we can all have a late lunch together. Doesn't sound bad, but take into consideration that we are now talking cyclists and their families (20-30 people), among a crowd of at least 36 000, and Brandt and I must make sure that we gather everyone up, and have a place at some or other restaurant, in a town we don't know, for 30-40 people (when you include us, kids, and his brother, etc.)! And she just told everyone already that Brandt and I will make the arrangements while they cycle that morning! So I was not impressed when I spoke to her last night, but I managed to say, we'll see on the day, and impressed some of the impossibilities of the situation on her. "Oh she didn't think about that, just thought it would be a great idea."

 

When they (Brandt, his mom and 1 other friend) cycle the Amashova in October here by us, I usually have to find a table at a place close by for 6-8 people (our family, mil, friend and his wife). That is super difficult if you take into consideration the +-14 000 people gathered around for the race. And I know Durban beach front a lot better than Cape Town! Brandt said nothing when she first spoke to him, which made her realise she is pushing her luck. You can't book places due to the crowd; restaurants work on a first come, first serve basis, and the cyclists don't finish together, or even within a short time of each other, meaning we will have to sit among the crowd for hours waiting for everyone!

Anyway! I'm not happy, but I can't do anything about it at the moment. Brandt didn't even want to talk about it after her phone call, he was even less happy than I was.

 

Otherwise, a calm, relaxed weekend. Brandt had his first marshal duties on Saturday. He drove down to the south coast on Friday night, and was home around 21h00 Saturday night. Sunday morning he woke up and started asking me very specific questions about finances and moving and stuff WHEN we go to NZ. He is now in full planning mode (meaning he makes suggestions then delegates those to me anyway; I have to do the planning, and gathering of detailed information, prices, etc. :D Nothing really changed, it is just official) and we ARE DEFINITELY GOING TO NZ!

 

The only question is when, depending firstly on arrangements around his work contracts here, secondly on getting our passports and papers in order - in our hands! (called visa ready), and thirdly, when he can get a job there. It would really be better to only apply once we have the SA papers in hand. Then we are sure of where we stand. But it is definite... we are planning on going to NZ, aiming for the south island, and now we just have to make things work out. And just like that a lot of stress rolled off my shoulders, to be replaced by other issues causing stress.

 

I started drawing up a spreadsheet calculating our costs, as close as I can work them out, for the various stages and things that need to be arranged. Example spreadsheet 1 is for everything paper related to getting Visas (paperwork, health checks, English tests...). Spreadsheet 2 will be about moving, getting rid of unwanted furniture and other household goods; spreadsheet 3 about pets arrangements, etc. Everything with its costs as close to as I can get, get quotes, etc. We'll start in earnest when we come back from the Cape, then I'll make arrangements with the second immigration agency to have that Skype talk. They sent Brandt a host of information, free of charge, which already gave us more of a direction of where things need to head. So basically... watch this space for a lot of future talks on emigrating to another country. And just like that I got a scared bunch of butterflies in my tummy!

 

The boys are so relieved. Adam was super stressed Friday night with Brandt away, so neither of us slept well. They are eager to climb in and focus on school work, so that we can get permission to HS that side, focus on health (for the health exams), and just... well I guess it is an adventure to work for, which we are all looking forward to! It will not happen quickly, will take a couple months, and maybe we are able to move before the end of the year, because we will also have to do some serious money saving! But we have something to save for: life in NZ, taking the pets with (very expensive), etc.

 

So nothing really new. You were probably expecting this, weren't you?! :D

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