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Butternut

Butternut becomes a hybrid

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2 hours ago, Diadhuit said:

Yes! I read it translated, but yes! Definitely that is the English title

Sent from my FIG-LX1 using Tapatalk
 

 

Ive always seem it at the library, but never grabbed it... Now next time I see it I’ll grab it!

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7 hours ago, Dalish said:

 

Yes.  Complacency in general is a huge fear.  I moved in with my Dad three years ago after a life of forced-nomadic tendencies.  I don't pay rent, I don't pay bills, I'm not under any pressure to find a job or contribute more than I already do.  And yet it's taken me three years to start putting down roots and accumulating "stuff".  Until this point I struggled with buying more clothes than I could fit in a suitcase.  Cause I was waiting for the other foot to drop.

 

Fact of the matter is, I wasted three years on unfounded anxieties instead of accepting that my world was doing pretty great.  Are there things to improve?  Absolutely, there are always things to improve.  But if you let that impact your ability to enjoy the now, then what is the end goal of the improvement in the first place?

 

Jaiden Animations has a great video on stuff similar to this that I think is quite applicable.

 

 

 

7 hours ago, Dalish said:

 

Yes.  Complacency in general is a huge fear.  I moved in with my Dad three years ago after a life of forced-nomadic tendencies.  I don't pay rent, I don't pay bills, I'm not under any pressure to find a job or contribute more than I already do.  And yet it's taken me three years to start putting down roots and accumulating "stuff".  Until this point I struggled with buying more clothes than I could fit in a suitcase.  Cause I was waiting for the other foot to drop.

 

Fact of the matter is, I wasted three years on unfounded anxieties instead of accepting that my world was doing pretty great.  Are there things to improve?  Absolutely, there are always things to improve.  But if you let that impact your ability to enjoy the now, then what is the end goal of the improvement in the first place?

 

Jaiden Animations has a great video on stuff similar to this that I think is quite applicable.

 

 

 

That video is so cute! And yes, very applicable.

 

I tend to go towards the “I don’t deserve this” or “I’m not lovable”

 

i may never ever say those exact words to myself but when I boil down my long conversation to myself, that is what I’m saying.

 

Its really weird because I worked hard to get the position I’m in, then I worked hard to get my raise, and now that I have it, I feel like it’s more on the line then it was when I was making $4 less.

 

I want to break this habit mind set. 

 

I am where i am I am today because of self improvement and being aware of how I present myself (I used to love to tell people “what I think of you”) 

 

anyways thank you for sharing your words as that video. 

 

Im facing today that I worked hard to where I am and I will enjoy it today ^_^ 

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Update!

 

sugar streak - got to 25 days without it!

  I enjoyed a vanilla matcha latte and some baked goods.

 

Now I’m on day 2! 

 

Wim hof going well! About to jump into a cold shower now !

 

wheat, didn’t have any yesterday! 

 

Ju Jitsu, I need to change this one because we aren’t getting a membership this month.

 

Oh!! So I made a “House Records”

on Sunday. It’s how many sit ups, push ups, squats, hold breath, and planks.  (Were also going to do how many marshmallows you can fit in your mouth) 

 

its a column with our names and we wrote it in pencil how many we did so we can continually break our own records!

 

My 8yr. Old is at 42 push ups! I’m at 15! Lol

 

but i hold the record of squats and planks, 102 squats and a plank 2 minutes and 5 seconds.

 

anyways it’s neat to see my kids trying to break their records. 

 

Alrighty, off the the cold therapy!

 

“Breath mother F%#$3R!”

   -Wim Hof-

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15 hours ago, Butternut said:

 

Do you ever have that fear that, if you do start enjoying it, it'll go away? 

 

Pulling this out of the logs

 

Yes, yes I do. Especially when I am afraid that I am finally happy and then the world will drop an extinction level event meteor into my life and ruin it all.  So its not just you.

 

Unless you don't have that moment, in which case, maybe its just me. Then again, replacements said it best

quote-you-re-playing-and-you-think-every

 

 

 

Board posted before I was done.. ugh

 

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5 hours ago, Butternut said:

I tend to go towards the “I don’t deserve this” or “I’m not lovable”

 

i may never ever say those exact words to myself but when I boil down my long conversation to myself, that is what I’m saying.

 

 

You are not alone. Mine tends to be more "I am not enough. I am not good enough, smart enough, A good enough student, mom, wife. Yeah, not alone.

 

WTG on making your sugar streak last so long. Having one day with sugar isn't going to be the end, but you have started to train yourself that these things are treats and not everyday items.

 

I love the idea of house records. I think that could be a very fun plan.

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Ive always seem it at the library, but never grabbed it... Now next time I see it I’ll grab it!
I am looking forward to hear your thoughts! Trigger warning for sickness and death talk

Sent from my FIG-LX1 using Tapatalk

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Yesterday I had to have a sample of a caramel turtle, an oatmeal cookie, and a London fog..

 

My sugar cravings are here with me today! 

 

Do you ever ever have that feeling that you just don’t want to put up with the will power? You know that it takes a lot to say “no” to the cravings , that you just don’t want to waste your energy?

 

i just want to give in today and say “ahhh f&@# it!” And eat all the chocolate in the case...

 

Especially for the fact I work in a Coffee house with chocolates...

 

i will probably be good, but man... I don’t want to care!

 

I MUST!! I MUST CARE!! 

 

Other then that, did my breathing yesterday and today. 

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wow, what a crazy ride.

 

Did some drilling a little by tonight.

 

Wim Hof and breathing is great.

 

still haven’t gotten a gym membership (it’s very hard to spend anything over $30)

 

sugar.. Meh. I indulged this weekend. And I had wheat.

 

but this morning waking up to a sore throat and groggy, I’m ready to eliminate it.

 

Im really finding Sugar is my drug.  If I have one piece of chocolate, the rest of the day I’m looking for another “hit” 

 

An alcoholic stops drinking, a heroine addict stops taking heroine, and with sugar I can stop..

 

 

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4 hours ago, Butternut said:

Im really finding Sugar is my drug.  If I have one piece of chocolate, the rest of the day I’m looking for another “hit” 

 

An alcoholic stops drinking, a heroine addict stops taking heroine, and with sugar I can stop..

 

I have this exact same issue with sugar, it's a real problem.  So many things in life I can practice moderation with, but sugar for me has to be a flat ban or I can't gain control over it.  It seriously sucks, hopefully you can get over the sugar hurdle soon!

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2 hours ago, Dalish said:

 

I have this exact same issue with sugar, it's a real problem.  So many things in life I can practice moderation with, but sugar for me has to be a flat ban or I can't gain control over it.  It seriously sucks, hopefully you can get over the sugar hurdle soon!

 

Thanks.

 

my only real issue is I’m like an alcoholic working at a bar. 

 

Working at a coffee house with sugary lattes, cookies, chocolates, etc., I’m constantly using my will power. 

 

I found this time time that I fell off the wagon I remember saying to my husband “I just don’t have the ‘oomph’ to care,” 

 

It’s something I need to be aware of. 

 

Since my weekend “indulgence “ I now have a sore throat, stuffy nose, and im going into depressive thoughts.  

 

Am I crazy to think it’s the sugary treats? Because it wasn’t just one treat, it was a weekend of having peanut M&M’s, pizza, ice cream, a bowl of cereal, donuts, and some sugary lattes.

 

 

Wow... writing it all down, I’m a little embarrassed 

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4 minutes ago, Butternut said:

 

Thanks.

 

my only real issue is I’m like an alcoholic working at a bar. 

 

Working at a coffee house with sugary lattes, cookies, chocolates, etc., I’m constantly using my will power. 

 

I found this time time that I fell off the wagon I remember saying to my husband “I just don’t have the ‘oomph’ to care,” 

 

It’s something I need to be aware of. 

 

Since my weekend “indulgence “ I now have a sore throat, stuffy nose, and im going into depressive thoughts.  

 

Am I crazy to think it’s the sugary treats? Because it wasn’t just one treat, it was a weekend of having peanut M&M’s, pizza, ice cream, a bowl of cereal, donuts, and some sugary lattes.

 

 

Wow... writing it all down, I’m a little embarrassed 

 

No, you're not crazy.  I can eat a single slice of cake or a bag of M&Ms and my mood tanks very rapidly.  Sugar crash is no joke!

 

Temptation really is rough.  There's a store literally two minutes drive from me that always has fresh cakes and candy is always on sale, and the temptation is so real.  And I relate so hard to not having the 'oomph' to care.  When I'm on form I'm mindful.  I step back and say "I don't NEED this, why do I want it so badly" and usually I can move on with no issue from that moment.  But when I lose the oomph to care about it, it snowballs pretty quickly, because the sugar crash enables the suppression of any oomph I may have had a little later in the day.

 

You had a bad downswing, and you've recognised it!  That's a big step in the process.  And recognising that you feel physically crappy because of that sugar is significant :)  progress is never linear, or we'd not learn anything on the journey.

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3 minutes ago, Dalish said:

 

No, you're not crazy.  I can eat a single slice of cake or a bag of M&Ms and my mood tanks very rapidly.  Sugar crash is no joke!

 

Temptation really is rough.  There's a store literally two minutes drive from me that always has fresh cakes and candy is always on sale, and the temptation is so real.  And I relate so hard to not having the 'oomph' to care.  When I'm on form I'm mindful.  I step back and say "I don't NEED this, why do I want it so badly" and usually I can move on with no issue from that moment.  But when I lose the oomph to care about it, it snowballs pretty quickly, because the sugar crash enables the suppression of any oomph I may have had a little later in the day.

 

You had a bad downswing, and you've recognised it!  That's a big step in the process.  And recognising that you feel physically crappy because of that sugar is significant :)  progress is never linear, or we'd not learn anything on the journey.

 

Thanks Dalish, your right. 

 

Im glad I’m recognizing it.

 

But why do I still go back? Even though I know what the affects are?

 

 

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2 hours ago, Butternut said:

 

Thanks Dalish, your right. 

 

Im glad I’m recognizing it.

 

But why do I still go back? Even though I know what the affects are?

 

 

 

Honestly, this is just a theory based on my own behaviours, I don't know if it's truth or not, but it definitely beats "I don't know".  But I kind of look at it like that ex you still kinda have a thing for but really was bad for you.  You broke up for a reason, a great reason, and your life in general has improved dramatically as a result.  But then there they are, with their delicious looks and smelling great and being all them, and you start romanticising the nostalgia.  The brain idealises the good times, glosses over the bad and you start thinking "Why did I let this one get away?  They make me so happy and feel so great!"  so you let them back in, even if a part of you knows you shouldn't, and before you know it they're eating away at your bank account, paying you insults instead of compliments and giving you a headache, and you go "Oh, right, that's  why I ended things!"  

 

The taste and the immediate gratification of delicious things is so tempting that we forget the flaws that come with it, even if it's just for a while.

 

 

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4 hours ago, Butternut said:

 

Thanks.

 

my only real issue is I’m like an alcoholic working at a bar. 

 

Working at a coffee house with sugary lattes, cookies, chocolates, etc., I’m constantly using my will power. 

 

I found this time time that I fell off the wagon I remember saying to my husband “I just don’t have the ‘oomph’ to care,” 

 

It’s something I need to be aware of. 

 

Since my weekend “indulgence “ I now have a sore throat, stuffy nose, and im going into depressive thoughts.   

 

Am I crazy to think it’s the sugary treats? Because it wasn’t just one treat, it was a weekend of having peanut M&M’s, pizza, ice cream, a bowl of cereal, donuts, and some sugary lattes.

 

 

Wow... writing it all down, I’m a little embarrassed 

 

 

First off -- Don't be embarassed

 

Second, The sugar might have an effect. I have noticed it makes me super tired if I eat it and I get grumpy and want another one. Thats why I stopped, but if its not at home, its easier because then I have to spend money and if I don't have cash, I can't hit the vending machine (Yes they take cards, but not in my head they don't).

 

Although, not going to lie, if I get into cookies/cupcakes/candy, I just have to eat them all. Safest bet for me is to stay away if possible.

 

 

2 hours ago, Dalish said:

 

Honestly, this is just a theory based on my own behaviours, I don't know if it's truth or not, but it definitely beats "I don't know".  But I kind of look at it like that ex you still kinda have a thing for but really was bad for you.  You broke up for a reason, a great reason, and your life in general has improved dramatically as a result.  But then there they are, with their delicious looks and smelling great and being all them, and you start romanticising the nostalgia.  The brain idealises the good times, glosses over the bad and you start thinking "Why did I let this one get away?  They make me so happy and feel so great!"  so you let them back in, even if a part of you knows you shouldn't, and before you know it they're eating away at your bank account, paying you insults instead of compliments and giving you a headache, and you go "Oh, right, that's  why I ended things!"  

  

The taste and the immediate gratification of delicious things is so tempting that we forget the flaws that come with it, even if it's just for a while.

 

 

Honestly, this makes a ton of sense. Or that friend that you know is just using you, but you tend ot be like "But they have a good side" and they do one thing for you and your all "Oh they aren't that bad."

 

You can do this Butternut. I know you can.

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5 hours ago, Bean Sidhe said:

 

 

First off -- Don't be embarassed

 

Second, The sugar might have an effect. I have noticed it makes me super tired if I eat it and I get grumpy and want another one. Thats why I stopped, but if its not at home, its easier because then I have to spend money and if I don't have cash, I can't hit the vending machine (Yes they take cards, but not in my head they don't).

 

Although, not going to lie, if I get into cookies/cupcakes/candy, I just have to eat them all. Safest bet for me is to stay away if possible.

 

 

Honestly, this makes a ton of sense. Or that friend that you know is just using you, but you tend ot be like "But they have a good side" and they do one thing for you and your all "Oh they aren't that bad."

 

You can do this Butternut. I know you can.

 

I must go 100%. I need to make a rule if I do indulge it has to be at the end of the day. 

 

Its hard not to indulge with kids. If my kids bake something or we go out for donuts. But I have an open communication with them and they know how I am. 

 

Anyways. Thanks man, I know I can do this with a little help ;) 

 

8 hours ago, Dalish said:

 

Honestly, this is just a theory based on my own behaviours, I don't know if it's truth or not, but it definitely beats "I don't know".  But I kind of look at it like that ex you still kinda have a thing for but really was bad for you.  You broke up for a reason, a great reason, and your life in general has improved dramatically as a result.  But then there they are, with their delicious looks and smelling great and being all them, and you start romanticising the nostalgia.  The brain idealises the good times, glosses over the bad and you start thinking "Why did I let this one get away?  They make me so happy and feel so great!"  so you let them back in, even if a part of you knows you shouldn't, and before you know it they're eating away at your bank account, paying you insults instead of compliments and giving you a headache, and you go "Oh, right, that's  why I ended things!"  

 

The taste and the immediate gratification of delicious things is so tempting that we forget the flaws that come with it, even if it's just for a while.

 

 

 

Dude! I agree! Damn leather jacket and awesome car....

 

i think i have it in my quote but my dad says “you always forget your hangover”  

 

I’d love to get that tattooed to me somehow... maybe in polish... hmmmm.

 

after i I did my post I started looking up what sugar does to immune system and it’s pretty interesting! 

 

DISCLAIMER : I am in no need a doctor or a proffesiobal (see I can’t even write that word right) and also I don’t have time to make references. Hehehe

 

Sugar does damper or “slow down” you immune system/ white blood cells. So having it frequently means your system maybe constantly down. Then you get an invader and BAM! Sickness.

 

glucose is broken down through the blood and fructose is broken down in the liver.  When the liver has to break down fructose it releases some fat making mechanism that goes to store in our fat. 

 

also over use of the liver can cause “fatty liver” which is a whole other ball park.

 

anyways... 

 

Im going to try to read an article every day about sugar. It’s like learning a different language, if you stop practicing and your not doing it, you forget!

 

Reading will be a good learning experience for me.

 

i want to be a healthy mom. If my kids are ever in danger, I want to be able to save them or just being able to keep up with them with playing & sports!  I can’t do that if I have a fever, bloated, and lathergic.

 

It’s good motivation 

 

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Went to Ju jitsu on Monday!

 

no sugar and wheat fro almost two weeks, until yesterday! Yahoo!

 

i do want to figure something out because when I go on strikes, and I introduce sugar, even if it is 1 thing.... the rest of the day I’m thinking about how I can get more. 

 

Which is pretty easy to find more. 

 

Anyways... I need to do some soul searching.

 

 

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