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Mike Wazowski: Just Barely Getting By


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I admire how you've managed to handle multiple disappointments of varying magnitudes with an admirable amount of grace, dignity, and humility. You were also still able to highlight the good stuff that happened as well, which can be all too easy to gloss over and forget about in the face of adversity. It demonstrates a lot of emotional maturity in this humble nerd's opinion.

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Stay awhile... we're liftin'

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On 4/29/2019 at 1:21 PM, Laghail said:

Its hard man, there's all this expectation and historical record around what a faith community needs to look like; similar beliefs, similar practices, similar lifestyles; but there are other ways to do spiritual life with other humans. Like disjointed mystics that honor the longing for god in each other, even while they don't share a lot of specific practices in common. Like massive marriage contracts where everyone is each others spouse, and you make really good silverware. Like the unitarian church where you only agree on social justice and human kindness.


I wouldn't know about the longing for god; I wasn't made that way and I don't understand it. I've started my own practice of animist meditations, but I don't think I would want to share them with anyone, because I know perfectly well that the spirits I talk to don't exist and I would have to look askance at anyone who took it too seriously. 

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Let cheese and bread and mead crowd out our secret desires for power and domination.

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20 hours ago, Mike Wazowski said:

Speaking of just barely getting by, I didn't succeed at many of my goals this weekend. I'm gonna goal set even lower than I had for this challenge: I'm just going to get through the rest of the month with grad school, put in good efforts in the gym and in dance training, and do my best to stay on track with food and make sure I reach out for social support from good friends. 

"Just." :P

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On 5/1/2019 at 1:25 PM, JessFit said:

"I didn't succeed at many of my goals this weekend."

Maybe not, but you had a really intense and busy weekend and it seems like you had good focus on other things that mattered. 

Thanks, and true enough!

 

23 hours ago, CourtnieMarie said:

ugh - sorry to hear about the disappointing scores! though it's almost better to hear good feedback from peers who are "in the trenches" with you as it were. glad you are using is to fuel your fire. and also no one needs an excuse for 'ritas and Mexican food! maybe next time you visit it'll be better weather for that :D 

Yup - with some guidance from our coach, we took it as feedback that the dancing is coming along nicely, we just need to up the skill of specifically being dance competitors, which requires a different skill set to attract judges' marks on a crowded floor. Definitely not the end of the world to have a disappointing first big competition, and it is great motivation for me to get my butt in gear and train really hard solo again - I'd been slacking on that for probably a year or more at this point. And yes, here's hoping we're back in Boston with better weather next time! :D Possibly in September, though that's just a firm maybe right now.

 

23 hours ago, scalyfreak said:

Think of it this way: If everyone agreed on every single point, you would be in a cult. ;)

Fair nuff. Though cults are comforting til they're horrifying!

 

23 hours ago, Deckard Gainz said:

I admire how you've managed to handle multiple disappointments of varying magnitudes with an admirable amount of grace, dignity, and humility. You were also still able to highlight the good stuff that happened as well, which can be all too easy to gloss over and forget about in the face of adversity. It demonstrates a lot of emotional maturity in this humble nerd's opinion.

22 hours ago, Harriet said:

I'm also inspired by your cool handling of disappointments. Wishing you much future zim. Zim isn't really a word, but if it were it would be the opposite of disappointment. 

Thanks all - I have to give credit where credit is due, you were reading my reflections *after* benefiting from some truly amazing support networks I've got (nerds, a work mentor, and a dance mentor) - it takes a village to raise one level-headed-ish twenty-something, lol.

 

4 hours ago, raptron said:

"Just." :P

A+++ bullshit calling as always! Lol - guess I'm a perfectionist even when I'm trying to scale back...

 

Yesterday was pretty uneventful - took it nice and lazy at work and then went home and vegged before going to bed early (there was a grad school midterm exam in there somewhere too) - it was necessary to rest and relax after getting a little burned-out feeling by the time Wednesday morning rolled around. I finished watching Brene Brown's Netflix special (HIGHLY recommend to basically anyone - she manages to talk about courage, vulnerability, and shame in a really empathetic and humorous way). Then pretty much wound down for bed and slept - it was very necessary and I woke up today feeling more like a fully functioning human, albeit one who still did not wanna go to work (don't worry, I sucked it up and dragged my butt into the office, but I was whiny about it).

 

Should be a nice chill end of the week, and I've got lotsa dance training, dinner with a friend, and possibly two first dates to look forward to this weekend! :D

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14 minutes ago, Mike Wazowski said:

Yesterday was pretty uneventful - took it nice and lazy at work and then went home and vegged before going to bed early (there was a grad school midterm exam in there somewhere too) - it was necessary to rest and relax after getting a little burned-out feeling by the time Wednesday morning rolled around.

... 

Should be a nice chill end of the week, and I've got lotsa dance training, dinner with a friend, and possibly two first dates to look forward to this weekend! :D

 

Your definitions of "uneventful" and "chill" amaze me. :P

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22 hours ago, raptron said:
On 5/1/2019 at 9:22 PM, Mike Wazowski said:

Speaking of just barely getting by, I didn't succeed at many of my goals this weekend. I'm gonna goal set even lower than I had for this challenge: I'm just going to get through the rest of the month with grad school, put in good efforts in the gym and in dance training, and do my best to stay on track with food and make sure I reach out for social support from good friends. 

"Just." :P

 

17 hours ago, Jett said:
17 hours ago, Mike Wazowski said:

Yesterday was pretty uneventful - took it nice and lazy at work and then went home and vegged before going to bed early (there was a grad school midterm exam in there somewhere too) - it was necessary to rest and relax after getting a little burned-out feeling by the time Wednesday morning rolled around.

... 

Should be a nice chill end of the week, and I've got lotsa dance training, dinner with a friend, and possibly two first dates to look forward to this weekend! :D

 

Your definitions of "uneventful" and "chill" amaze me. :P

No wonder I feel inadequate when it comes to productivity/managing my time compared to you nerds. :D 

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19 hours ago, Jett said:

Your definitions of "uneventful" and "chill" amaze me. :P

HI, I'm Mike and I'm the self-appointed president of the Dallas chapter of the no-chill club. :D But, fair - the dance training is really life-giving and energizing for me, so it doesn't feel like a ton of work.

 

2 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

No wonder I feel inadequate when it comes to productivity/managing my time compared to you nerds. :D 

:D are you similarly bad at the chill? I feel like we're kindred spirits there. :P

 

18 minutes ago, JessFit said:

Ahhh, good luck on the two first dates! 

TY TY!!!! Just pinged both of them to confirm cause they kinda went radio silent for a bit, guess worse comes to worst I just have a bit more free time and there are plenty of other promising ones out there (including some intimidatingly smart folks, which is exciting to come across).

 

Thursday: basically slacked all day at work, but did find some time to reflect and have a conversation with myself (basically a come to Jesus talk) about how I want to structure my approach to work and grad school going forward. Then got my butt to the dance studio and had a really good practice - my partner's great and we're both feeling the same competitive fire (we're also supporting each other through a lot of emotional SHIT right now - I got some bad news on the family health front on Wednesday that I didn't post about here - won't go into detail, but it has me grappling with my parents' mortality in a way I hadn't before).

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 Ballroom dancer, data nerd, calisthenics dabbler

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Hugs, friend. 

 

Glad you guys had a great practice. :) 

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4 minutes ago, Mike Wazowski said:

:D are you similarly bad at the chill? I feel like we're kindred spirits there. :P

 

Nope I'm great at the chill. Too good in fact hahaha :lol:

 

So sorry to hear about your family, hope things will be ok. It's great that you have such a supportive relationship with your partner, I imagine these external life things can put a huge strain on the practices and the relationship otherwise.

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14 minutes ago, Mike Wazowski said:

TY TY!!!! Just pinged both of them to confirm cause they kinda went radio silent for a bit, guess worse comes to worst I just have a bit more free time and there are plenty of other promising ones out there (including some intimidatingly smart folks, which is exciting to come across).

 

Very positive thinking, well done! 

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Let cheese and bread and mead crowd out our secret desires for power and domination.

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<3 hope you have a relaxing weekend and i'm here to talk if you ever need it!

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6 hours ago, raptron said:

Hugs, friend. 

Thanks, friend. Really appreciate it. <3

 

6 hours ago, raptron said:

Glad you guys had a great practice. :) 

:) for sure, we're feeling that start of off-season fire. And we brought back "f*** around time" to start off our practices, aka putting music on and just dancing together without set choreo - some really cool stuff came up yesterday! 

 

6 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

Nope I'm great at the chill. Too good in fact hahaha :lol:

Hahaha gotcha - in that case, we're happy to stage a long-distance intervention. :P

 

6 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

So sorry to hear about your family, hope things will be ok. It's great that you have such a supportive relationship with your partner, I imagine these external life things can put a huge strain on the practices and the relationship otherwise.

Yes, it is great that he and I can be so open with each other - I love that I can say "hi, I need a hug" at the start of practice and we can quickly address that before getting down to business.

 

6 hours ago, Harriet said:

Very positive thinking, well done! 

Thanks - I try at least. In the moment, my self can be a LOT less rational than it is right now.

 

4 hours ago, CourtnieMarie said:

<3 hope you have a relaxing weekend and i'm here to talk if you ever need it!

<3 thank you so much - really appreciate it! I'm good for now, but there's a very real chance I'll be hitting you up in the future as I process stuff. :)

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2 hours ago, Mike Wazowski said:

Thanks - I try at least. In the moment, my self can be a LOT less rational than it is right now.

 

Wait, you mean you're human too? :P 

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“I've always believed that failure is non-existent. What is failure? You go to the end of the season, then you lose the Super Bowl. Is that failing? To most people, maybe. But when you're picking apart why you failed, and now you're learning from that, then is that really failing? I don't think so." - Kobe Bryant, 1978-2020. Rest in peace, great warrior.

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Hope you survived the weekend :)

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On 5/3/2019 at 7:29 PM, scalyfreak said:

Wait, you mean you're human too? :P 

Against my best efforts, yes! :P

 

17 hours ago, miss_marissa said:

Hope you survived the weekend :)

:D I did!! And it was a pretty good weekend, all in all.

 

Weekend wrap up:

  • Had dance practice every day Thursday through Sunday - lots of work on getting our jive choreography feeling good at full speed and cementing cha cha and rumba info we've gotten from other lessons; we also did our first set of truly full-out comp-style reps in a practice and it was BRUTAL, highlighting that it's an area we definitely need to work on more in the coming months so that we can be stone-cold killers when we walk into our next competition.
  • Had a couple dates over the weekend: drinks with a guy Friday night (he was nice, but kinda awkward and there wasn't much chemistry), coffee with a guy I had been trying to schedule with forever on Sunday (much more fun, he's nerdy and fun to talk to - I'm excited to see him again and the feeling is mutual)
  • Grabbed dinner with my dance partner after practice on Saturday, and it was really nice to just hang out as friends outside of the studio
  • Did some general putzing around at home, too, I think? Dunno what I filled the rest of the time with, probably just recovering from the intense training schedule.

 

Still hanging in there and surviving, and staying mostly sane - still really just coasting this challenge for the most part, other than doing my best to NOT overcommit myself.

 

Oh, and dance partner and I found a new favorite song for jive practices:

(Even if you think the song is "meh", the montages from a 2016 movie musical about a buncha teenagers in 1980's Ireland is totally worth the couple minutes of watching).

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12 minutes ago, Harriet said:

What are comp style reps and why are they brutal? 

Basically, think of it as absolute max effort - we're dancing as large as we can, with full energy and performance quality because we need to be noticed from 50+ feet away on a crowded floor. We do that for 90 seconds at a time, times 5, times 4 (i.e. 4 sets of 5 reps of 90 seconds, about 30 minutes of effort in total over an hour). It's a LOT physically, but it's mostly a mental challenge to stay in a positive, performance-focused mindset instead of letting ourselves dwell on the mistakes that are happening in the moment (because there are ALWAYS mistakes). 

 

12 minutes ago, Harriet said:

Also, good news about the nice nerdy date! So exciting! 

Yup - I'm excited to see where this goes!

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2 minutes ago, Mike Wazowski said:

Basically, think of it as absolute max effort - we're dancing as large as we can, with full energy and performance quality because we need to be noticed from 50+ feet away on a crowded floor. We do that for 90 seconds at a time, times 5, times 4 (i.e. 4 sets of 5 reps of 90 seconds, about 30 minutes of effort in total over an hour). It's a LOT physically, but it's mostly a mental challenge to stay in a positive, performance-focused mindset instead of letting ourselves dwell on the mistakes that are happening in the moment (because there are ALWAYS mistakes). 

 

Yup - I'm excited to see where this goes!


I had no idea you could vary the dance intensity but now that you explain it, it makes perfect sense! 

Let cheese and bread and mead crowd out our secret desires for power and domination.

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8 minutes ago, Harriet said:

I had no idea you could vary the dance intensity but now that you explain it, it makes perfect sense! 

Yep - similar to lots of things, the more skill you have the more intensely you can do the thing! (Like weightlifting or martial arts, you don't have the ability to do a really taxing version of it until you've built up some skill).

 

4 minutes ago, JessFit said:

Yay for good dancing time and a good date! This is super exciting. Are there vids of you dancing that we can peruse? Maybe youtube or something? I miss ballroom dancing. 

Yep, it was a nice restorative weekend with lots of good stuff!

 

In terms of videos, not a ton, but here's one I posted a challenge or so back from a competition at the end of March - we're the couple in all black, the loud cheering you hear is the collegiate team that's adopted us as part of their team at this point:

 

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34 minutes ago, Mike Wazowski said:

Yep - similar to lots of things, the more skill you have the more intensely you can do the thing! (Like weightlifting or martial arts, you don't have the ability to do a really taxing version of it until you've built up some skill).

 

Yep, it was a nice restorative weekend with lots of good stuff!

 

In terms of videos, not a ton, but here's one I posted a challenge or so back from a competition at the end of March - we're the couple in all black, the loud cheering you hear is the collegiate team that's adopted us as part of their team at this point:

 

omg i somehow missed this when you posted it so thank you for resurfacing it. you two dance so well together!!

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