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Atrytone

Atrytone Tackles the Life Wheel

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I've been pretty unhappy lately. With a lot of things. I'm going to try a life wheel exercise to try and get some things back on track. This will probably be half-challenge, half-introspection. There will also probably be a lot of negativity at first because I'm mentally not in a great place right now.

 

I've chosen eight categories for my Life Wheel.

  1. Career: How I feel about my employment.
  2. Finance: How I feel about my earnings.
  3. Health: How I feel about my health.
  4. Social: How I feel about my social life.
  5. Contribution: How I feel about my contributions to my community.
  6. Recreation: How I feel about my downtime.
  7. Love: How I feel about the love in my life.
  8. Self-Image:  How I feel about myself.

 

Challenges will evolve as I tackle the Wheel.

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I'll do paragraph write-ups on why I scored each of the categories the way I did later. For now though - the higher the number the better I feel about that aspect of my life, the lower the number the worse I feel about that aspect of my life.

Life Wheel.png

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I'm sorry to hear that you've been down.  I can very very relate to this.  I am so glad that you have come back here!  I'll be following to offer what help and support I can while you work on stuff.

 

Happy Challenge!

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9 minutes ago, Cheetah said:

I'm sorry to hear that you've been down.  I can very very relate to this.  I am so glad that you have come back here!  I'll be following to offer what help and support I can while you work on stuff.

 

Happy Challenge!

 

Thank you Cheetah. I really appreciate that.

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We are taught to use the wheel as a diagnostic tool as part of our initial coaching session.

I will be interested to hear your journey of self analysis.

Sent from my CPH1725 using Tapatalk

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12 minutes ago, Thom Stépan said:

We are taught to use the wheel as a diagnostic tool as part of our initial coaching session.

I will be interested to hear your journey of self analysis.

Sent from my CPH1725 using Tapatalk
 

 

Yeah. One of my coworkers mentioned that they do one every year just to see where they're at and to reassess/improve. So I thought I'd give it a try. So far it looks rather bleak tbh.

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1 hour ago, Tova the Vibrant said:

I've used similar systems in the past, and I know how seeing the low numbers can be depressing. I know you can focus and introspect and feel better. 

Take care :) 

 

Thank you, I appreciate the kind words.

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3 hours ago, Atrytone said:

So far it looks

 

Well, you have to start where you are.  Any start is a good start, I think. 

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Don't stress, mine is pretty crappy in a few areas as well. As a wheel it would make for a good sled.

Your start is your start. Pick one area and focus on improving things there. Then once you feel happier about that life area choose the next life area.

Sent from my CPH1725 using Tapatalk

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I'm sorry to hear that you feel down. You are always very supportive on my thread and I appreciate it. 

 

 

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17 hours ago, DJtrippyT said:

I'm sorry to hear that you feel down. You are always very supportive on my thread and I appreciate it. 

 

Thank you. I've always struggled with self-esteem/self-worth so this isn't something new. It just sucks. Also I'm so supportive I'm Professionally Supportive B) 

But yeah. I've always found it easier to support others. I tend to be much more critical of myself.

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23 hours ago, Atrytone said:

 

Thank you. I've always struggled with self-esteem/self-worth so this isn't something new. It just sucks. Also I'm so supportive I'm Professionally Supportive B) 

But yeah. I've always found it easier to support others. I tend to be much more critical of myself.

This. So much this.

Also partially Professionally Supportive, and historically extremely critical of myself. Only in the last 4 months have I made any headway into the Self Compassion Forest.

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On 4/22/2019 at 7:52 AM, Tova the Vibrant said:

This. So much this.

Also partially Professionally Supportive, and historically extremely critical of myself. Only in the last 4 months have I made any headway into the Self Compassion Forest.

 

Ooh the Self Compassion Forest sounds lovely. Remind me to ask for directions there. :)

 

On 4/26/2019 at 11:01 AM, DJtrippyT said:

Came by to say hi! Hope your week is going well

 

Thanks. I've been slow to start my challenge write-ups but I am making self-improvement efforts. It's small but it's a start.

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Career (7/10) - I have a job as a support worker. It’s amazing to finally be doing work that relates to my psychology degree. There are opportunities here for me to continue my education and start to get more involved with my community. The downside is I only have 11 hours on a good week. Sometimes it’s significantly less. So I need to work other jobs as well which is sub-optimal.

 

Finance (1/10) - Because of the low hours at both my jobs I can’t afford to support myself. I’m 28 and forced to rely on my parents generosity. There aren’t a lot of places to live in this community and of those even fewer allow pets. Anything halfway affordable gets snatched up instantly and with an inconsistent income I’m in a very difficult position.

 

Health (3/10) - I’ve barely been going to the gym. I’ve been having a drink or two almost every day. My financial situation has me incredibly stressed out. I’m not sleeping well. Either I stay up too late because going to bed feels like too much effort or I wake up multiple times during the night. My clothes are mostly in a cardboard box since there’s no room for a dresser in the room I’m staying in at my parents house.

 

Social (4/10) - I don’t get out often. When I have days off I just want to stay at home and decompress. I rarely see my friends and I’m not meeting anyone new.

 

Contribution (1/10) - I don’t really do anything for my community outside of my work. I’d like to be able to contribute more to my town and to the queer community.

 

Recreation (4/10) - I mostly just watch Netflix or YouTube. It’s fine for the most part but I wish I’d get out a little more.

 

Love (6/10) - I know my friends and family care about me. But sometimes it feels like I’m just imagining it. Or that I care more? Or rather, like I need them more than they need me. That’s kind of a shitty feeling because I’m torn between clinging and pulling away to protect myself.

 

Self-Image (2/10) - I tend to base my self-image on how successful I feel. Right now I feel like a huge failure for not being able to support myself. At the same time my health has been suffering and I feel responsible for that too. It’s hard to feel good about myself when I feel like I can’t even get the basics right.

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What have I done this week to work on it?

 

Career - Spoke to my boss about getting more hours. I’ll have to wait at least 3 months but I feel like she was listening to me.

 

Finance - I have a job interview for a part-time administrative job tomorrow.

 

Health - It’s been 3 days since I’ve had any alcohol. I went to the gym on Friday and I plan to go tomorrow as well.

 

Social - I’ve started up a weekly D&D game with some friends and my brother. It’s been two weeks and it’s been pretty fun so far. It’s my first attempt at DMing so that’s been interesting.

 

Contribution - I’m volunteering at a gala fundraiser being put on by my job and another non-profit in the area. It’s small but it’s a start.

 

Recreation - Weekly D&D.

 

Love - n/a

 

Self-Image - Feeling a little bit better about myself now that I’m trying to tackle some of the things that had me really down.

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I've never seen this kind of wheel chart before, but I really like it. I think I'm going to use it too! Thanks for sharing, you definitely contributed to my learning today :) 

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10 hours ago, kcaleece said:

I've never seen this kind of wheel chart before, but I really like it. I think I'm going to use it too! Thanks for sharing, you definitely contributed to my learning today :) 

 

Yeah it's new to me too. :) 

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You have slightly different categories, to the one we use, but the basic intent is the same.

In my course we are taught to ask our clients to select one of their weakest areas that they would like to work on first. We then spend the rest of our coaching sessions (usually 4-12 weekly sessions) to help them grow in that life area.

The various life areas inter-relate and imorovement one area can improve other areas. A simple example from your own is your finances. If you were to gain an extra 10-20 hours per week in your support worker role, how much would that raise your self image score? Or allow you the financial flexibility to be able to afford to go out?

The changes you have already implemented may seem like small steps. Yet small changes can lead to large impacts to your life and sense of well being.

Sent from my CPH1725 using Tapatalk

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9 hours ago, Thom Stépan said:

You have slightly different categories, to the one we use, but the basic intent is the same.

In my course we are taught to ask our clients to select one of their weakest areas that they would like to work on first. We then spend the rest of our coaching sessions (usually 4-12 weekly sessions) to help them grow in that life area.

The various life areas inter-relate and imorovement one area can improve other areas. A simple example from your own is your finances. If you were to gain an extra 10-20 hours per week in your support worker role, how much would that raise your self image score? Or allow you the financial flexibility to be able to afford to go out?

The changes you have already implemented may seem like small steps. Yet small changes can lead to large impacts to your life and sense of well being.

Sent from my CPH1725 using Tapatalk
 

 

I site I got the wheel from encouraged you to use your own categories. So that's probably part of the reason for the differences. What categories do you use? 

 

I think the problem with small change is that it FEELS small. It's easy to forget that a lot of small changes equals a huge change. I'll try to keep that in mind as I progress.

 

Thank you for the information, positivity, and encouragement Thom. It means the world.

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Sorry I haven't been around much lately.  I can very much relate to things that you're going through.  I went through a similar time of life, when things just weren't coming together and it was really hard to not be down about it all.  The good news is that things get better as you work at them; it just takes time.  It's really good to see you taking steps toward improving things!  Keep up the good work; you can do it!

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1 hour ago, Cheetah said:

Sorry I haven't been around much lately.  I can very much relate to things that you're going through.  I went through a similar time of life, when things just weren't coming together and it was really hard to not be down about it all.  The good news is that things get better as you work at them; it just takes time.  It's really good to see you taking steps toward improving things!  Keep up the good work; you can do it!

 

Thank you. :) And no need to apologize! I get that everybody has their own busy lives on top of everything.

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I have my high school grad reunion coming up this July. I'm pretty stressed about it since my classmates were pretty much the worst part of the experience for me. Without meaning to I keep engaging in negative self-talk about what I've done in the past 10 years and telling myself that I haven't done anything with my life etc.

 

SO. Today's positive thing is a list of awesome things I've done in the past ten years:

  1. Volunteered for Hospice for a year.
  2. I've gotten two piercings and three tattoos.
  3. Finished a BA psychology degree in four years.
  4. Graduated from my BA psych program with Distinction (in the 90th percentile)!
  5. Spent a little more than a year living in Vancouver - completely independently.
  6. I did the Grouse Grind.
  7. I was a TA at SFU for a psychological statistics course.
  8. I've learned more about and come to fully accept my queer identity.
  9. I now have a job in my field, in my community.
  10. I'm saving up to buy a house.
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