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Sciread77

Baking, Suburban Homesteading, and Health

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15 hours ago, Waanie said:

This is huge! We are all producing far too much waste, and it is nice that you can use recycling and a compost-pile to reduce the amount of garbage you have. 

 

It's huge, and we're very proud.  I missed putting the trash and recycling out last week and still didn't have a full can to put out this week.

 

15 hours ago, Waanie said:

I'm sorry that your loss is still hitting you so hard at random moments. Have you thought about counselling? There is no way to know why she did it, but a professional might help you with coping with it in a healthy manner.

 

I'm in ongoing counseling, but my appointments are 2-3 weeks apart and this happened the day after my last session.  Be rest assured I'll be talking about it next time!  

 

15 hours ago, Waanie said:

Can we have garden pictures? I bet it is getting really beautiful now :).

 

Of course!  I'll take some this weekend.  We have some beautiful peony plants but I hate that they're on either side of our tiny porch.  They practically hide it!  The last owners also really liked Japanese plants, which I generally love though I'm adding more native plants.  We bought 3 more fruit trees and 5 fruit bushes that still need to go in the ground.  I'll send pics when all those are in the ground and out of the planters.

 

14 hours ago, Ann of Vries said:

Still, sometimes I lie awake at night running through every possible factor in my head for the millionth time.

 

I once heard that the grief and confusion of death never goes away, but it's like standing on the edge of the ocean and the waves start huge and crashing and drowning, and eventually may be less turbulent--but there are still waves. These things are so immensely difficult and it's totally okay for you to take the time you need to process it.

 

I believe it.  That's an awful situation and I'm sorry you had to go through it.  I'm sure I'd be replaying that one, too.  That's more like what I'm feeling that most of my previous experiences with grief.  It sort of makes me miss "clean" grief.  But life is messy and doesn't fit into neat little classifications.  My goal is to process.  I don't want to hang onto it forever; I know people who've been a big mess for a decade and still seem to grieve as hard now as before, and I know others that pretend they're past it but don't really process and do things like get hammered or have dangerous sexual encounters rather than deal with the emotions.  

 

In any case, sounds like putting one foot in front of the other is one of the most important things.  It makes me glad I have stuff to do at home.  I've been keeping busy doing productive things at work, and I'm doing more of the active stuff I enjoy like working in Spanish and I'm trying my hand at learning some Russian via my Spanish for fun.  

 

 

 

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Super proud parenting moment. My kindergartener got first place in his age group the citywide science fair. He doesn’t Know yet because the results posted after he goes to bed, but he did a fantastic job! We provided guidance and help (mostly in the form of taking dictation and providing the base cookie recipe for the taste test) but he did the rest including the graphs. 

 

Go go little man! Wooo!

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Goals are all going pretty well. 

 

I’m learning the Cyrillic alphabet and some Russian words via Spanish materials to keep my brain on and help me think more in Spanish. I’ve been reading a tremendous amount of material at work as part of the job so that’s in line. 

 

I’m running an experiment and removing Zyrtec from my daily meds for a while. I’m wondering if that’s contributing to my fatigue and depressed feelings too. I’ve read a bunch of accounts that depict something similar so we’ll see if there’s something to it.  Wish me luck. I’ve been taking it daily or multiple times daily for about a decade. 

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Good luck with removing Zyrtec, especially in hay fever season! I have heard from more people that they get really tired when taking it (it is the most common over the counter anti-histamine here), and multiple times per day sounds really often. If it turns out you do need something for your allergies, there are plenty of alternatives, for which most you will probably need a prescription.

 

Glad to hear that your goals are going well :).

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8 hours ago, Waanie said:

Good luck with removing Zyrtec, especially in hay fever season! I have heard from more people that they get really tired when taking it (it is the most common over the counter anti-histamine here), and multiple times per day sounds really often. If it turns out you do need something for your allergies, there are plenty of alternatives, for which most you will probably need a prescription.

 

Glad to hear that your goals are going well :).

 

Thanks. Although there’s really no good time for me.  I’m allergic to dogs and cats and have 2 of each. Though the biggest reason I started taking so much was living near lots of oak trees and there are no oak trees at all at the new house. 

 

I have what turns out to be a migraine today but I took a Zyrtec in case it was an allergy headache. After 800 mg of ibuprofen and 1000 mg of Tylenol didn’t stop it. So we’ll try again tomorrow. 

 

It’s  Mothers Day and I’m not about to let some little experiment ruin the day for my lovely wife. 

 

 

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Update. 

 

This weekend we’re taking the time to finish the playset and put the rest of the plants in the ground. I’m hoping on the playset because the Puća (4-year-old) was caught throwing necessary bolts and other hardware into the grass last night. Worst case I guess we’ll run to the hardware store. 

 

It’s been a rough time and I’ve not done much of what I wanted, but I have made some progress. I’ve been a lot more active. I’m starting to feel better mentally. I took a test this morning and I’ve more than doubled my Spanish vocabulary since October, and my recent addition of studying Cyrillic and Russian from Spanish is helping me learn to think in it. 

 

I also have a phone interview with another company this afternoon. I’m open to moving as my company never really changed my comp after I got the MBA even though I’ve used it to save the company many multiples of the cost of my education and I’ve been concerned about some things in the company for the last few years. I like my current group and opportunities all right, and it’s a stable enough environment to launch the bakery from. On the other hand, the other job would pay half again more, meaning we’d be able to afford the truck faster and my wife could probably go full time with the bakery earlier. So we’ll see. I won’t be making a jump to something that will take over my whole life or for little reward, and I hear the benefits aren’t as good. 

 

It'll be good to get outside again. We’ve been trapped indoors and working a lot. My wife is feeling super exhausted and burned out because we’re spending lots of time on prepping for nationals when she’s normally be winding down for the summer and actually seeing us. Getting outside and working in the yard and garden really helps, as does spending time with the family. 

 

 

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Glad to see that you are making progress, even though life is crazy :)

 

I hope the interview went well, it is always good to have options. Have fun gardening :).

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