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Unikarm

I failed and now I’m trying to Level Up

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I just can’t get a break every time I try to succeed and finally level up. I get thrown back down to level 1 for real! It’s all the same and on repeat. 

 

Instill need to to figure out my goals but one thing is for sure. I don’t want to work in a kitchen at a gas station anymore 

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Hey Unikarm! I can't spread any leaderly advice or praise about goals until I see what you've got planned, but I want to comment on this failure aspect. 

 

It's tough to feel like you're trying super hard and then you slip up once and all your progress is swept away. It sucks. I feel that. 

 

But it's also tough to feel like taking a few steps away from your goals is a failure. It's a pretty harsh perspective, especially for someone like you who's clearly putting in the effort! Eventually, after spending long enough with that thought pattern, you can get to a place where the effort seems pointless because the task is Sisyphean; you lose perspective and instead of seeing the sought-after achievement as difficult, you start seeing yourself as sub-par. I don't want that for you. As far as I'm concerned, by recognizing you've got a problem and taking steps to address it, you're already succeeding, even if progress is slow and not always straightforward. 

 

Remember that in many respects maintenance is its own form of success. Maintenance is just "not going backwards." Usually I see it in terms of weight loss, but I think maintaining your mindset to continue striving is just as important. We all experience moments of weakness, and sometimes we're hard on ourselves. But we keep going, and slowly but surely, we make progress. Sometimes we do go backwards, sometimes on a few fronts at once. But we stick with it, because we're Rebels. 

 

My favorite quote on the subject is, "Failure is not an option. Failure is a guarantee; the option is whether or not you let failure be the last thing you do." It's not over til YOU decide it's over, and you clearly haven't. You''re keeping at it, even despite everything. You're spectacular, and you're gonna crush this challenge on your terms. Now let's get to it! 

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I posted this on Facebook the other day.

 

”So Sodexo keeps calling for an interview for the janitor position I’ve called back too we just keep missing each other lol.
And I’m applying for T-Mobile they have this video test thing I have to do first though.
Casey’s is crap. The kitchen gets to like 90 degrees and the AC is broken it’s just awful I hate it .”

 

i cant help but keep feeling like a failure I’m always knocked back down to level one. Having to reset my stats and all. I don’t know what to do with myself right now. Keep working, go back to college, lose weight? I don’t know. My life is depressing. I’m not even sure where to start on this challenge I have huge goals for myself you know LEVEL UP. I’m going to be 31 I feel old and tired and sore and it’s too late to “start over”

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34 minutes ago, Unikarm said:

i cant help but keep feeling like a failure I’m always knocked back down to level one. Having to reset my stats and all. I don’t know what to do with myself right now. Keep working, go back to college, lose weight? I don’t know. My life is depressing. I’m not even sure where to start on this challenge I have huge goals for myself you know LEVEL UP. I’m going to be 31 I feel old and tired and sore and it’s too late to “start over”

 

What do you want out of life? What does success look like to you? It's tempting to say "anything but this" but try to fight that urge. What's most important to you right now? We all have lots of things to improve in our lives but it's necessary to prioritize to be able to focus. This zooms our perspective in from "wow my life sucks" to "this specific part of my life sucks the most so I should start improvement there." What are you the most upset about or disappointed with in your life? What does a good version of that aspect of your life look like and what steps, even incredibly tiny steps, can you take to get there? 

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Your cat is adorable! <3 

Image result for toothless gif

 

I think you are getting very caught up over this "failure" word. It is just that... a word. Like table, cheese, chicken, tennis. Over the course of my journey I have "Failed" many times and had to start over but its not really starting over... I am still on my journey. I started trying to lose weight at 250lbs. I got down to 225lbs... something happened and I stopped. I then tried to start losing weight at 260lbs.... cause eesh I had never been that high! I got down to 230lbs.... full on fell off the wagon there... like under it. I think it hit me on the way over. I think I tried another time around 275lbs. But I stopped. Now I have started at 285lbs. If you didn't notice my weight kept going the wrong way ultimately lol. I hit 275.6 lbs this morning. I am going to keep trying. Eventually it has to stick.  And you know what... each failure I learn something new for the next time. Its learning what works for you and what does not work for you. IT IS OKAY TO FAIL. 

 

As per your goal... It seems your biggest goal right now is to find new employment. You should make that your life goal.  What are 3 things you can do to work towards that? Obviously I can't tell you what to do and I do not know what is best for you (only you do!) but.... when I was picking myself up I started with small things to just get my life on track and develop healthier habits... and as I have been going on they have evolved to the next level or scaled back to something I could complete. SEE its just all an evolution.

 

So what do you think would help you at this moment in your life? Do you just want to build a routine while you figure out the job business? Do you want to lose weight? Do you want to build muscle? Perhaps add things in your routine that make you feel not so old and tired and sore. IE. bubble baths once a week, a massage, self care / love routine. 
 

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At this point I want a steady job and paycheck it’s just me and my kitty.

i have an interview for janitor here at the schools. I’d rather be a white collar worker than a blue collar worker but whatever a job is a job. And I’m 250 right now I’ve even thought of losing weight and joining the military since the age limit is now 39 but we’ll see. I just don’t know. I’m kinda quiet and depressed right now.

 

what happened was I had a job for a few months in the field my associates degree is in. It was good pay but I couldn’t keep up and my math skills are poor and pretty much everywhere I go I get bullied. Even on wow at some point but I was new. At my last job my position was dropped because they did away with the department. And a so called friend got everyone even management laughing at me. I hate people. 

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6 minutes ago, Unikarm said:

At this point I want a steady job and paycheck it’s just me and my kitty.

i have an interview for janitor here at the schools. I’d rather be a white collar worker than a blue collar worker but whatever a job is a job. And I’m 250 right now I’ve even thought of losing weight and joining the military since the age limit is now 39 but we’ll see. I just don’t know. I’m kinda quiet and depressed right now.

 

what happened was I had a job for a few months in the field my associates degree is in. It was good pay but I couldn’t keep up and my math skills are poor and pretty much everywhere I go I get bullied. Even on wow at some point but I was new. At my last job my position was dropped because they did away with the department. And a so called friend got everyone even management laughing at me. I hate people. 

People freaking suck. Period. But some people suck less ;)

 

Janitor sounds like a solid job though. And you can always do that until you either find another job in your field or figure out what else you would prefer. It doesn't hurt to look into the military thing if you think it is something you might enjoy. PLUS.... being a janitor is a fairly active job so it will help you move more and burn more calories... AND YOU GET PAID FOR IT. 250lb is as good as any place to start. I personally wouldn't worry too much about losing weight but maybe make small goals like home cook a meal 3 times a week or make healthy lunches and breakfasts. Depression is a sticky thing. Can you get to a doctor who could help you sort out some of your feelings? Or would it be enough for you to join a weekly club, team, volunteer somewhere to get you out and socializing. My friend has a journal where she writes positive things every day. Sometimes all she can write is "I woke up today" or "It is sunny and the breeze is nice". but it seems to be helping her.

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35 minutes ago, Rookie said:

People freaking suck. Period. But some people suck less ;)

 

Janitor sounds like a solid job though. And you can always do that until you either find another job in your field or figure out what else you would prefer. It doesn't hurt to look into the military thing if you think it is something you might enjoy. PLUS.... being a janitor is a fairly active job so it will help you move more and burn more calories... AND YOU GET PAID FOR IT. 250lb is as good as any place to start. I personally wouldn't worry too much about losing weight but maybe make small goals like home cook a meal 3 times a week or make healthy lunches and breakfasts. Depression is a sticky thing. Can you get to a doctor who could help you sort out some of your feelings? Or would it be enough for you to join a weekly club, team, volunteer somewhere to get you out and socializing. My friend has a journal where she writes positive things every day. Sometimes all she can write is "I woke up today" or "It is sunny and the breeze is nice". but it seems to be helping her.

 

I also just got an interview at the hospital I lost my other job at. It’s housekeeping but it’s good pay and benefits. 

I should probably be on cymbalta. 

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6 hours ago, Unikarm said:

 

I also just got an interview at the hospital I lost my other job at. It’s housekeeping but it’s good pay and benefits. 

I should probably be on cymbalta. 

That also sounds like a great job. Which do you think would be a better fit to you? 

 

If that is something you want to do / think you should do you could always make that a mini quest. 

 

Also I'm going to apologize right now lol sometimes I'm over the top positive... Which I realize can be annoying or off-putting because of course it's easy to be positive when you aren't going through the same things. But I do care <3 and it is sincere.

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Cute cat. 

 

5 hours ago, Rookie said:

Also I'm going to apologize right now lol sometimes I'm over the top positive...

Don't apologize, I need more optimists in my guild! Rebel as a whole has self-esteem issues. Help me fight them with rainbows and sunshine and cute Toothless gifs. 

 

Unikarm, it definitely sounds like securing a new job should be your top priority right now. And it seems like you're already working on it, with two interviews lined up! You're definitely no slouch, and even though you say you'd rather have a white collar job, it says something (really good, imo) about you that you've still applied for blue collar work. 

 

Job transitions can be tough and they often take longer than expected, so maybe while keeping "new job" as your focus, you can also think of a couple of other aspects of your life you want to work on to create some stability. You could pick weight and mental health, for example, and take stock of where you're at right now, come up with some things you can do to maintain at this state, and then start building up to improvement from there. Every goal you make at NF doesn't have to be about transforming your life. Rookie is absolutely right, small steps are still worthwhile, and smaller steps can also be more manageable and help you build up some momentum. 

 

I'm a teacher and I'm not above assigning random strangers on the internet homework, so here's yours: take five minutes to think about what matters to you, and then think about all the things you have to do in support/management of that thing, all the things you're currently doing, and what your ideal situation regarding that thing would look like. Four steps. Maybe for the first aspect, the only thing that comes to mind is your cat. That's fine, that's a great place to start. From there, you know you've gotta have money for cat food, vet visits, litter, and maybe a discretionary fund for toys and enrichment. You also need to spend time with your cat to keep him/her happy: time playing, brushing, cuddling, whatever your cat likes. Right now you have the gas station job and it's covering expenses, but you'd like to splurge and you hate the job for other reasons, so you need an update there. You're also spending 15 minutes of solid attention on your cat every day. Ideally, you'd like it to be 30, with a job that lets you come home not feeling soul-crushed so you actually WANT to enjoy time with your cat.

 

From there, your goals are apparent: get new job, spend more time with cat, investigate ways to improve energy. If it's weight, same thing: "my size matters to me, to lose weight I need to eat right, currently I eat crap and am slowly gaining, ideally I want to eat crap and look like a supermodel. To get there, I first need to change my diet temporarily, and then once I look great I can eat crap and I'll be living my dream." Try this exercise yourself and see what comes up. You might have a jumbled mess of things in your "ideal" and not know where to start to get to them all, but at least you'll have a list and some direction, which is frankly more than you've got right now. And once you have that direction, it's a lot easier to break it down into manageable chunks. Give it a go, you might surprise yourself! 

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7 hours ago, Wobbegong said:

Don't apologize, I need more optimists in my guild! Rebel as a whole has self-esteem issues. Help me fight them with rainbows and sunshine and cute Toothless gifs. 

 

Yes ma'am! 

Image result for reporting for duty gif

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You guys are amazing

And my goals aren’t exactly diet or fitness related my goals for this challenge are gonna be more life goals. Or work goals. I’m still trying to put it together. It’s just too big of a picture lol it’ll probably turn into a 5 year plan. 

One of the interviews it was the one for that janitor position called an cancelled

im not calling back. 

I still have the interview for housekeeping later today. And the gas station is giving everyone a raise but it’s still part time with no benefits and I need to have full time. 

I also have a crazy expensive apartment that I need to move out of. I need something cheaper and it’s just me and my cat so nothing flashy. I also have a dream of going back to college for writing but that might not happen.

im putting out applications everywhere heck I might even just go back to Walmart lol. 

Also I got a new hard drive in my computer and it runs much faster. I’m excited for it. I might re subscribe to world of war craft for something to do. 

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I have stomach problems too and have lost jobs because of it.

so

maybe just no dairy for this challenge

put out more applications 

save money 

 

those are good goals 

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Those are great goals! If you want (only if you feel like it), you could make them a teensy bit more specific, just so you know what you're measuring against. Is "more applications" two more? Twelve more? Four a day? Fifteen a week? Having clear parameters can help with the "I don't wanna" that inevitably trips me up, but everyone's different so you do you! Just having those three things listed out is already great. 

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Woke up late

called into work late and I’ve only been there for like 2 weeks

 

made an inter for TTECH on Wednesday 

 

i don’t feel good because of pasta and I hate my life 

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Life Goal- Support myself

 

Goal 1- get a better job.

right now it’s gas station work and it’s horrible. I will put one application out every week.

currently I have an interview with a call center on Wednesday.

 

goal 2 - Save Money

dont go out and eat everyday

work on cooking skills like I do in wow lol

try to put 100 into savings every month 

 

screw following the guidelines of goal setting lol I’m a Rebel. Right now and as it has been since my 20s is bettering my life finding a job I like and support myself.

 

also I’m making this

665E9E3A-9B64-41A6-81E5-D8E358F42C5D.jpeg

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10 hours ago, Unikarm said:

I burnt them....kinda

 

Cooking is a tricky thing. Without a recipe I am hopeless. With a recipe, if I do all of the prep first (before any heat gets turned on) and follow all the steps, I can usually end up with something edible. I am completely baffled by people who just throw things together and get food at the end. Good on you for giving it a go.

 

Good luck with your interview tomorrow!

 

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18 hours ago, Unikarm said:

I burnt them....kinda

I think for burgers kinda burnt is better than undercooked, which can make you sick. Good on you for having a go! And kudos for the sweet cast iron frying pan.

 

If you want to get into cooking more, I highly recommend looking for some simple new recipes to try out. As @Whisper said, if you follow the steps you can make something amazing! You can just think of something you like to eat and google a recipe for a homemade version. Youtube tutorials are also a godsend.

 

It's not even about healthy eating; it's about the feeling of accomplishment and pride that comes with creating something. Dude, you deserve that feeling and sometimes all it takes is a fancy toasted sandwich to get it ;)

 

Edit: Also good luck at your interview!!

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9 hours ago, Whisper said:

 

Cooking is a tricky thing. Without a recipe I am hopeless. With a recipe, if I do all of the prep first (before any heat gets turned on) and follow all the steps, I can usually end up with something edible. I am completely baffled by people who just throw things together and get food at the end. Good on you for giving it a go.

 

Good luck with your interview tomorrow!

 

 

 

Sometimes I can throw something together and it tastes okay.

but usually like a pasta or stir fry lol.

but these burgers were an epic fail.

place buying them pre made into patties is not a good idea. You can’t flavor them right .

 

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1 hour ago, Unikarm said:

buying them pre made into patties is not a good idea. You can’t flavor them right

Now you know what not to do next time :friendly_wink:

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Okay so

I GOT THE JOB AT TTECH!!!!

 

11.25 plus commission and it’s call center and all nerdy lol :greedy_dollars:

 

Goal 1 met— so that goal had been met so now the goal is to keep that job.

 

-to make commission you have to make at least 2 sales a day so that’s a goal I’ll make 3 lol.

-listen and learn during my training and learn about the home security system we are selling 

 

goal 2 stil save money

buy only what I need!!

learn to cook

 

lets make a diet goal goal now for my stomach issues.

-cut out dairy

- stop going out and eating 

- stop eating fatty food I don’t have a gallbladder so my body might rejoice for this one lol

 

 

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Can you maybe look at a new apartment once things settle down at your new job? That will help you save money. I know you already mentioned you wanted to do that. 

 

CONGRATS! :) That is awesome. I hope its something you will enjoy.

 

Love the evolution of your goals lol Maybe instead of a definite stop going out and eating you make it only eat out a minimum of 2 times / week. Or if I eat out choose healthier option. I am only mentioning this because the other 2 are quite strict and strict doesn't leave room for much mistake and its easy to get overwhelmed if you miss 1 day. 

 

Great job, keep it up :3  

 

 

 

 

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