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Tanktimus the Encourager

The Dadjoke Awakens: Tanktimus Becomes a Parent

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On 9/12/2019 at 10:09 AM, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

You have no excuse now that your GL powers let you see my challenge before everyone else.

I still forget I can use my powers for evil ;)

 

I love this...I know I shouldn't be in awe of how much the dads on this thread help their partners with child duties but I didn't have that when my kids were babies.

I like to say I was the laziest mother around, when my boys would wake up, I would get up, change them, put them in bed next to me to feed them, and fall back asleep...so would they.

We would wake later in the morning, rested 

Majority of the time my ex-husband had no idea the baby was in bed with us (I always put them on my side)

Keep up the good work Dad!

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17 hours ago, Jarric said:

 

What do you call a deer with no legs and no eyes?

 

Still no ideer?

 

 

 

Dinner?

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11 hours ago, Harriet said:


Thank you for these. Excellence. Sheer excellence. 

:D 

1 hour ago, RES said:

I still forget I can use my powers for evil ;)

 

I love this...I know I shouldn't be in awe of how much the dads on this thread help their partners with child duties but I didn't have that when my kids were babies.

I like to say I was the laziest mother around, when my boys would wake up, I would get up, change them, put them in bed next to me to feed them, and fall back asleep...so would they.

We would wake later in the morning, rested 

Majority of the time my ex-husband had no idea the baby was in bed with us (I always put them on my side)

Keep up the good work Dad!

I appreciate that. I'm sorry you had such a rough experience.

37 minutes ago, Rinna said:

 

Dinner?

There is no jerky better than venison jerky.

 

Rough night last night. We went upstairs to bed at 9. Little Bit stopped fussing and finally slept at 2. She would feed for a few minutes, fall asleep, then cry when we put her down. The adults had a mini meltdown. It all finally worked out and we got about 5-6 hours of sleep, but it was frustrating from about 11:30 till 2.

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Reading this is bringing back a lot of memories of sleepless nights as new dad.  We had a system that worked well enough: she would get up and feed the baby, I would then change him and put him back down and usually we were both equally tired but still got enough sleep to (barely) function.

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1 minute ago, WhiteGhost said:

Reading this is bringing back a lot of memories of sleepless nights as new dad.  We had a system that worked well enough: she would get up and feed the baby, I would then change him and put him back down and usually we were both equally tired but still got enough sleep to (barely) function.

 

Yea, I'm getting a little new baby ptsd here. 

 

Also, thank goodness we had a small baby. If she was any bigger she would have been delivered by a crane.

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1 hour ago, WhiteGhost said:

Reading this is bringing back a lot of memories of sleepless nights as new dad.  We had a system that worked well enough: she would get up and feed the baby, I would then change him and put him back down and usually we were both equally tired but still got enough sleep to (barely) function.

I'm guessing nature suppresses those memories so people are more willing to have multiple kids.

1 hour ago, Grumble said:

 

Yea, I'm getting a little new baby ptsd here. 

 

Also, thank goodness we had a small baby. If she was any bigger she would have been delivered by a crane.

I love my little bit. I do not love the circumstances of this phase. 

 

I did the NF Beginner KB workout while Baby Tank and Sra. Tanque napped. I got two of the three rounds. Still using a 15 lb bell.

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1 hour ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

I'm guessing nature suppresses those memories so people are more willing to have multiple kids.

My wife calls that pregnancy brain. Though we often joke with our second child that if she had been first, she would have been an only child as she was super fussy. But now she is the easy one and the oldest is very trying on our patience.

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58 minutes ago, GoodDoug said:

My wife calls that pregnancy brain. Though we often joke with our second child that if she had been first, she would have been an only child as she was super fussy. But now she is the easy one and the oldest is very trying on our patience.

One of the things I have heard is that the first 3-4 months of life are in no way predictors for the rest.

57 minutes ago, GoodDoug said:

Hi Sorry, I'm Dad.

The classics never get old. 

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I can’t remember when mine started sleeping through the night.  Being an at hime mom, I tried to let my hubby sleep since he had to go to work and school.  Many nights I’d lie down to nurse and fall asleep.  It was awhile before I wasn’t being summoned every 2-3 hours.  Naps were a must.  It will get better, I promie.

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Congratulations Tank, she's super cute!

 

On 9/10/2019 at 8:56 AM, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

We went to bed early last night, which means we got up early enough to have plenty of time to prepare for the day. We actually Made An Effort and put on real clothes. Given my afforementioned Queer Eye binging I have layered some shirts and put on good shoes with my jeans.

But did you French tuck?

tumblr_poh3wfLQYV1v73mnao2_500.jpg

 

On 9/11/2019 at 11:30 AM, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

That would be...unpleasant.

This one has fought her hands out of every swaddle i've done so far.

I would always (still do) stick one foot out from the blankets, and if someone tucked me back in I would just stick my foot right back out again. My parents gave up trying to get me tucked in properly :tongue:

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2 hours ago, Rinna said:

I can’t remember when mine started sleeping through the night.  Being an at hime mom, I tried to let my hubby sleep since he had to go to work and school.  Many nights I’d lie down to nurse and fall asleep.  It was awhile before I wasn’t being summoned every 2-3 hours.  Naps were a must.  It will get better, I promie.

I will hold on to that promise and hope.

2 hours ago, maegs said:

Congratulations Tank, she's super cute!

 

But did you French tuck?

tumblr_poh3wfLQYV1v73mnao2_500.jpg

 

I would always (still do) stick one foot out from the blankets, and if someone tucked me back in I would just stick my foot right back out again. My parents gave up trying to get me tucked in properly :tongue:

Of course I did a French tuck.

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18 hours ago, RES said:

I still forget I can use my powers for evil ;)

 

I love this...I know I shouldn't be in awe of how much the dads on this thread help their partners with child duties but I didn't have that when my kids were babies.

I like to say I was the laziest mother around, when my boys would wake up, I would get up, change them, put them in bed next to me to feed them, and fall back asleep...so would they.

We would wake later in the morning, rested 

Majority of the time my ex-husband had no idea the baby was in bed with us (I always put them on my side)

Keep up the good work Dad! 

*hugs*, but don't feel alone on the nightly duties.

As my husband was/is our breadwinner, I never woke him up during the night. Once he woke up he couldn't go back to sleep, and a bear has nothing on a grumpy man in the morning! :D He also couldn't take 'family leave' as he worked for himself, so no work, no pay. I struggled through the first 3 months with our first son, barely coping (even with copious amounts of advice from mil, and other friends). I wanted to take Adam to a chiro because he got stuck at birth, leading to emergency c-section - and he cried a lot, really a lot, and acted all colicky, but older people told me it wasn't colic. Hubby thought I was too taken up with these 'new fangled ideas' and just had to learn what to do. I called a chiro (a friend of ours) to discuss an article I'd read about babies, getting stuck, neck pains, etc. so he got hubby to agree to bring him in. That first visit immediately sorted out most of Adam's pain and discomfort, and hubby was so impressed with the decision 'he had made' about seeing the chiro :D . We are still friends with the chiro. Trusty chiro friend also suggested we put Adam in bed with us at night for me to feed him, and some other suggestions, which was the best advice ever! But Adam slept between hubby and myself. I was too scared that he'd fall off! We had this great padded square 'box' you put between the pillows, which kept baby from being squashed. We eventually bought an extra big king size bed after Rocco was born, because our Great DaneX still insisted on sleeping at my feet, on the bed, every single night. He was 'the oldest child', and he wasn't giving up his bed! (But that's a story for another time - as he wasn't supposed to live to see a full life, which was why we allowed him on the bed in the first place.)

 

Another suggestion of Mr. Chiro was that I go grocery shopping ALONE on a Saturday morning, leaving Adam with hubby to look after, at home. So it came that hubby would do baby watching and nappy duty most weekends (whether I was at the shops or not), and I would have some much needed time off. We went on with that arrangement till well now, actually. Hubby hates shopping so it was a win-win.

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs, facing off against a tiger?

Claude.

 

Good job troopering through all the new baby phases and skill gainz.   I do not envy that at all.  Thankfully, I was born with, and developed, zero interest in having babies - because I'd never manage through it!  LOL    I am always super impressed by the folks who do, and continue to kick butt beyond that.

 

 

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With all that exhaustion it's really amazing to me you are still managing to work out.

 

Sending hugs to Sra. Tanque!

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Ohhh those early days.. they really are a test for your relationship! Looks like you two are doing exceptionally well :) 

 

When mine was that little we'd also share the nighttime work, but as soon as multiple diaper changes were no longer a thing I solved the getting up part with a co-sleeper. Pull baby towards you, feed, push baby back into her own place, all without lifting your head off the pillow :D

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34 minutes ago, KB Girl said:

Ohhh those early days.. they really are a test for your relationship! Looks like you two are doing exceptionally well :) 

 

When mine was that little we'd also share the nighttime work, but as soon as multiple diaper changes were no longer a thing I solved the getting up part with a co-sleeper. Pull baby towards you, feed, push baby back into her own place, all without lifting your head off the pillow :D

 

I... don't think Tank can get that particular use out of a co-sleeper himself.

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10 hours ago, ElizeElvinFoxRyder said:

*hugs*, but don't feel alone on the nightly duties.

As my husband was/is our breadwinner, I never woke him up during the night. Once he woke up he couldn't go back to sleep, and a bear has nothing on a grumpy man in the morning! :D He also couldn't take 'family leave' as he worked for himself, so no work, no pay. I struggled through the first 3 months with our first son, barely coping (even with copious amounts of advice from mil, and other friends). I wanted to take Adam to a chiro because he got stuck at birth, leading to emergency c-section - and he cried a lot, really a lot, and acted all colicky, but older people told me it wasn't colic. Hubby thought I was too taken up with these 'new fangled ideas' and just had to learn what to do. I called a chiro (a friend of ours) to discuss an article I'd read about babies, getting stuck, neck pains, etc. so he got hubby to agree to bring him in. That first visit immediately sorted out most of Adam's pain and discomfort, and hubby was so impressed with the decision 'he had made' about seeing the chiro :D . We are still friends with the chiro. Trusty chiro friend also suggested we put Adam in bed with us at night for me to feed him, and some other suggestions, which was the best advice ever! But Adam slept between hubby and myself. I was too scared that he'd fall off! We had this great padded square 'box' you put between the pillows, which kept baby from being squashed. We eventually bought an extra big king size bed after Rocco was born, because our Great DaneX still insisted on sleeping at my feet, on the bed, every single night. He was 'the oldest child', and he wasn't giving up his bed! (But that's a story for another time - as he wasn't supposed to live to see a full life, which was why we allowed him on the bed in the first place.)

 

Another suggestion of Mr. Chiro was that I go grocery shopping ALONE on a Saturday morning, leaving Adam with hubby to look after, at home. So it came that hubby would do baby watching and nappy duty most weekends (whether I was at the shops or not), and I would have some much needed time off. We went on with that arrangement till well now, actually. Hubby hates shopping so it was a win-win.

Yes, we both need alone time away from the baby. I'm glad things worked out for you.

4 hours ago, Starpuck said:

What do you call a man with no arms and legs, facing off against a tiger?

Claude.

 

Good job troopering through all the new baby phases and skill gainz.   I do not envy that at all.  Thankfully, I was born with, and developed, zero interest in having babies - because I'd never manage through it!  LOL    I am always super impressed by the folks who do, and continue to kick butt beyond that.

 

 

Thank you. I have gone up and down about wanting babies, now I know I want this one for sure!

4 hours ago, Raxie said:

With all that exhaustion it's really amazing to me you are still managing to work out.

 

Sending hugs to Sra. Tanque!

It was hard, I just found a time the baby was asleep and Sra Tanque could spare me. It helps it wasn't a long workout and I could do it at home.

3 hours ago, Elastigirl said:

Great job getting that workout in. Hope the next nights bring more sleep

Sleep seemed to be better. Baby Tank woke up often for feedings, but did sleep at least an hour to an hour and a half in between. 

2 hours ago, KB Girl said:

Ohhh those early days.. they really are a test for your relationship! Looks like you two are doing exceptionally well :) 

 

When mine was that little we'd also share the nighttime work, but as soon as multiple diaper changes were no longer a thing I solved the getting up part with a co-sleeper. Pull baby towards you, feed, push baby back into her own place, all without lifting your head off the pillow :D

I've heard of those, but we aren't ready for something like that yet.

2 hours ago, Grumble said:

 

I... don't think Tank can get that particular use out of a co-sleeper himself.

No, but when we are doing skin to skin contact and Baby Tank decides she's hungry she'll start rooting, and every once in a while before I can stop it she tries to latch on to my nipple. It isn't a satisfying experience for either party.

have-nipples-greg-can-you-milk-me-quick-

 

Today is a day. We are waiting on a Delivery of a stand up freezer that should have been delivered Friday, but wasn't in stock. Still waiting to hear on when today it's coming. We were given a window of 8am to 8 pm.

1ecqff.jpg

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1 hour ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

I've heard of those, but we aren't ready for something like that yet.

it's not for everyone, some can't sleep with the baby that close.. some can't sleep without the baby that close x) whatever works! 

 

1 hour ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

We were given a window of 8am to 8 pm.

really, could that be any less useful? 

 

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1 hour ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

We were given a window of 8am to 8 pm.

When we are in the car driving somewhere and one of the kids asks "When will we get there?" I answer with the equally unhelpful, "Definitely before next week!"

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When we are in the car driving somewhere and one of the kids asks "When will we get there?" I answer with the equally unhelpful, "Definitely before next week!"


Me: “Time is a circle. If we take long enough we’ll get there before we left.”
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2 hours ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

No, but when we are doing skin to skin contact and Baby Tank decides she's hungry she'll start rooting, and every once in a while before I can stop it she tries to latch on to my nipple. It isn't a satisfying experience for either party.

Most frustrated you'll ever see an infant.

 

I saw my ex-girlfriend across the museum today. I thought about saying hi, but there was just too much history between us.

 

Yesterday a clown held a door open for me. I thought it was a nice jester.

 

My deaf friend talks in his sleep. Damn near pokes his eyes out.

 

I keep telling people, but they're shocked when they find out I'm not a good electrician.

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6 hours ago, KB Girl said:

it's not for everyone, some can't sleep with the baby that close.. some can't sleep without the baby that close x) whatever works! 

 

really, could that be any less useful? 

 

It could, if it involved more than one day in the window.

5 hours ago, GoodDoug said:

When we are in the car driving somewhere and one of the kids asks "When will we get there?" I answer with the equally unhelpful, "Definitely before next week!"

As an adult I love that GPS answers this question for me.

5 hours ago, Sloth the Enduring said:

 


Me: “Time is a circle. If we take long enough we’ll get there before we left.”

 

I like that.

5 hours ago, Grumble said:

Most frustrated you'll ever see an infant.

 

I saw my ex-girlfriend across the museum today. I thought about saying hi, but there was just too much history between us.

 

Yesterday a clown held a door open for me. I thought it was a nice jester.

 

My deaf friend talks in his sleep. Damn near pokes his eyes out.

 

I keep telling people, but they're shocked when they find out I'm not a good electrician.

A theological dad joke: when asked about my views on the end of the world instead of espousing a premillennial or postmillennial view I tell them I am a panmillennialist. When asked for clarification I say that means I believe it will all pan out in the end.

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