Jump to content

Mad Hatter retreats


Mad Hatter

Recommended Posts

9 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

I don’t have much to report from yesterday. Had to be at the office as the CEO of the main company was here for a visit. We even got an order to get into the office at 9 instead of 10, and also to not be too weird, just to make a good impression. (Which I thought was extremely dumb, not because of the time, but because changing how we work or who we are to make an impression makes zero sense to me.)

Dumb for sure - forcing people to change who they are usually makes a worse impression, IME.

 

9 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

not until the CEO waltzed out of the conference room in shorts and a T-shirt and baseball cap. Which he wore the entire day. Not what I expected from the CEO of a billion dollar company. :P 

I actually would expect all that from a tech company. Maybe minus the waltzing :P

 

9 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

In the evening I wasn’t feeling so hot, so I made myself a cup of tea and started reading and then I woke up a in the middle of the night wondering what the hell just happened and why is the light on.

Sounds like you really needed the sleep, hope the rest helped!

 Ballroom dancer, data nerd, calisthenics dabbler

Link to comment
12 hours ago, zenLara said:
14 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

until the CEO waltzed out of the conference room in shorts and a T-shirt and baseball cap. Which he wore the entire day.

And it was you the workers who had been asked to not be too weird?

Best story of the week.

Hah, indeed! :) 

 

On 9/26/2019 at 9:37 AM, Mad Hatter said:

But with emotions I can't do that, I can't tell myself that emotions are irrelevant and simply discard them. I don't know if it's a question of practice? Or is it because emotions are felt more in the body, like on a physiological level? Maybe different strategies are then required? Perhaps more physical - like smiling, relaxing the shoulders, softening the face and the jaws, I also thought about the idea of shaking like a dog does when they "context switch". Or are emotions one of those things that have to completely experienced before you can let go of them? Or maybe the emotions won't go away until you've dealt with the underlying thoughts, even if the thoughts are no longer conscious? Clearly thinking about this lead to a lot more questions than answers, but funnily enough, thinking about the frustration made it go away and I went to bed quite pleased and happy. :) 

Hm! Interesting stuff! :)

With emotions I do think sometimes you've got to sit with them a bit.. like if you're feeling awful it can help to really allow the feeling for a bit and then cry for a bit and you'll feel much better. This even works if the reason you're crying is not the reason you're feeling crappy in the first place, like watching a sad tv show. 

And sometimes it's just acknowledging them and then they'll go away.. I had to deal with this a lot because the period after having Emma with my hormones all over the place and lots of tiredness I was rather.. angry. So I'd get into arguments with Jaap or be really snappy at him, not for no reason but just overreacting.. and I had to train myself to notice that I was really just feeling tired or sad or overwhelmed or scared.. then once I did I would tell Jaap about it in simple words, finally start feeling the real feeling, often cry.. and then I'd get a hug and it'd be mostly better. 

  • Like 2

Main Quest: becoming a decent kettlebell lifter and a great coach

Current challenge: KB Girl's next turning of the wheel

my instagram - my gym's instagram

Link to comment
11 hours ago, Mike Wazowski said:

Dumb for sure - forcing people to change who they are usually makes a worse impression, IME.

Exactly. M was saying that because of the order she got really nervous and ended up avoiding him altogether! While I took the approach of not giving a shit about the order, because it's dumb. Like I do with almost all dumb orders. :P 

 

Incidentally, one of the first topics of conversation at morning coffee was the beauty of mould and whether we should do experiments with it in the fridge.

I think we did rather well on the not being weird front.

 

11 hours ago, Mike Wazowski said:

I actually would expect all that from a tech company. Maybe minus the waltzing :P

I really didn't, while our Helsinki office of 10 people definitely has that tech company culture, the parent company is an old, extremely corporate institution (which causes quite a lot of friction between us and them). The CEO's also insanely, filthy, rich, yet doesn't want to spend money on a hotel. Yet he's building himself a new mansion... Interesting. 

 

Also metaphorical waltzing. :D Just to be clear. :P 

 

Thanks @KB Girl and @zenLara for your thoughts! It's interesting that you have two kinda same, kinda different approaches - observing the feeling, vs really get all absorbed in the feeling for a while. Maybe different approaches work better in different situations? I've had times when I've been feeling sad but didn't want to and distracted myself from the emotion, but in the end crying it all out always helps. Sometimes it's the same with anger, a good rant and I feel better. But perhaps for other diffuse or nagging feelings, where there's no clear outlet, like in this case frustration, maybe observing the feeling is a more suitable approach...

  • Like 1
  • Haha 1
Link to comment

This has not been a good week for hobbies. At work yesterday I wanted to fix a thing that I recently broke, it wasn't a very important thing, but still. I fixed it, but then I kept discovering more things that have never worked properly, and I got OBSESSED with making it perfect. Which I did (with some nasty, nasty code MUAHAAHA), but at the expense of me being the last one to leave the office, which I think might be the first time ever... And at being social, too much complaint. Here's a sample conversation.

 

Colleague: It's coffee time.

Me: I'm on my way.

Colleague: It's coffee time.

Me: I'm on my way. Anyyy second now!

Colleague: Coffee is getting cold.

Me: I'm on my way. Really! I'm just going to test this one, little, thing...

Colleague gives up and brings me coffee to my desk.

 

Needless to say, I didn't do anything when I got back home, I ate some food, and I forced myself to read so I wouldn't go to bed toooo early, and that's it.

  • Like 2
Link to comment
8 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

Thanks @KB Girl and @zenLara for your thoughts! It's interesting that you have two kinda same, kinda different approaches - observing the feeling, vs really get all absorbed in the feeling for a while. Maybe different approaches work better in different situations? I've had times when I've been feeling sad but didn't want to and distracted myself from the emotion, but in the end crying it all out always helps. Sometimes it's the same with anger, a good rant and I feel better. But perhaps for other diffuse or nagging feelings, where there's no clear outlet, like in this case frustration, maybe observing the feeling is a more suitable approach...

I think that in the end both approaches are similar. The thing is to find the time to stop and be there with the feeling until it expresses itself and goes away. Distracting from the emotion doesn't usually work for me, they just wait and come back stronger and pile one on the top of another.

Also, for anger or similar emotions, I usually choose other methods, such as doing something physically exhausting, like running uphill or scrubbing the floor with a scourer. After most of the energy is consumed, I can sit down and think or write about the episode.

He who conquers others is strong; he who conquers himself is mighty.

Adventures don't start until you get into the forest.

Link to comment

I like those eyes.

 

How is the side project thing coming? Are you still working on that?

HUNTER OF ALL THINGS SHINY

Intro Thread    Bodyweight Exercise Library   Shuffle Club

The Arruvia Conspiracy Challenges: 1, 2, 3, 4, 567, 89, 10 

Other Challenges: 12345, 6, 7, 89, 10, 11, 1213, 14, 15 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 3132, 33Humbug[Current]

Level 2 Ninja

Strength: 13 Intelligence: 14 Wisdom: 6 Dexterity:14 Constitution: 12 Charisma: 11

 

Link to comment
15 hours ago, zenLara said:

Great drawing! Wow! 

Thanks. :) It was quite tricky as obviously my eyes would constantly be moving between looking at the paper and looking at the mirror. :D 

 

14 hours ago, zenLara said:

Also, for anger or similar emotions, I usually choose other methods, such as doing something physically exhausting, like running uphill or scrubbing the floor with a scourer.

I think this is quite common, a replacement for punching someone in the face I guess. :P It's still very interesting how changes in physical state can affect mood.

 

13 hours ago, WhiteGhost said:

I like those eyes.

Thanks!

Link to comment
14 hours ago, WhiteGhost said:

How is the side project thing coming? Are you still working on that?

Funny you should mention that!

First some background: For the past few months I've been completely unable to help out, I've been too mentally incapacitated. But once I started feeling better I realised that while I genuinely did want to help, I also really did not want to write code. There were so many occasions were I would sit down in front of the computer, open up the software, and immediately I'd get unhappy and anxious and guilty and all of those bad things. It felt like doing your least favourite chores, but worse. Don't get me wrong, I think that code can be a cool tool, it just... doesn't excite me. And when I already do it for a living, the idea of spending my precious spare time doing something I only don't mind, it's too much. I won't get into the "what the hell what do I want to do with me life, except not this" part of the thought process, but it's strongly linked. I told A all of this a short while back, and that I didn't know for how long this feeling would last. Which I felt shitty about, but he's really understanding and he wants me to enjoy the process, otherwise what's the point?

 

Of course we were still talking about the project, and I've been trying to be helpful in a supporting role. A's been feeling unusually overwhelmed by the next steps, so I suggested we'd meet up for a chat, which we did just yesterday. Our discussions are always quite interesting, while we both work in the same field, it often feels like we're living on different planets when it comes to tech. :D We discussed many things, one of them which was marketing, and this is where perhaps I could be helpful. We decided it'd be neat to write a series of articles that would be partly indirect marketing, but mainly they'd provide useful content. There might be one or two things that I could write from scratch, but the main bulk of the ideas would have to come from A. However I told him that what we could try is if he wrote a crappy first draft, or even a brain dump, I could try to turn it into a proper article, which would significantly speed up the process. Now, I haven't written anything except email since I wrote my masters thesis in physics, but it's at least a skill that would be interesting to learn! :) 

  • Like 3
Link to comment

Yesterday I woke up in the most splendid mood, it was incredible! :D It was a gorgeous day, I did handstands, I went for a swim, then I met up with A at a cafe. When they kicked us out at closing time we continued our conversation on a lovely nature walk. I love how the low autumn light filters through the leaves. When I got home I started jotting down ideas for an article and before I knew it I had most of the structure down. :) 

 

At the end of last month/beginning of this month I experimented with taking very short notes summarising each day, something that I could easily skim through and perhaps notice mood trends or warning signs. I had completely forgotten about it, and when I accidentally came across the notes yesterday I was gobsmacked by the difference in mood. Only 24 days ago I was barely keeping it together, it feels like such a distant memory of a different person, while yesterday was pure joy. :) 

  • Like 7
Link to comment

I didn't sleep well and had a very mopey day yesterday. For the first time this challenge all I wanted was easy entertainment and it made me even mopier when I couldn't. I attempted a nap, but inconveniently enough I got an idea for a second marketing article, so I jotted down some notes. I didn't feel like finishing any of them though. Or do anything else for that matter. Oh well, one of those days. 

 

Edit: I did eventually force myself to at least do one drawing exercise. It didn’t turn out very well, but hey at least it was mildly productive. 

 

A66F1067-6782-4D59-BB16-BCFC1B95AE9E.thumb.jpeg.a0ee78d14233348af4e80abb8cf1d11f.jpeg

  • Like 3
Link to comment

Yesterday evening I still had a remnant of the "I don't wannas, I just want to be entertained and not have to to think for a bit." I broke that loop by rolling around on the floor for a bit which seemed to help. I think it's only because it's dark outside, and when screens are off at 8 pm there's this gap where I feel like it's getting late and I should be winding down for bed, when in fact it's still really early and there's plenty of time left to do stuff. 

  • Like 3
Link to comment

That gap drive me nuts too - sun sets here 5:30/6-ish for most of the year through and it’s weird.

It’s also hot, so that’s got my body all confused - enough so that I’m vaguely shocked when my glasses fog up when taking the dogs out right after sunset. [emoji38]

Level 78 Wood Elf Druid

Druid: || 59 | 60 | 61 | 61.5 | 62 | 63 | 64 | 65 | 66 | 67 | 68 | 69 | 70 | 71 | 72 | 73 | 74 | 75 | 76 | 77 | 78 | 79 | 80 ||

Ranger: || 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30 | 31 | 32 | 33 | 34 | 35 | 36 | 37 | 38 | 39 | 40 | 41 | 42 | 43 | 44 | 45 | 46 | 47 | 48 | 49 | 50 | 51 | 52 | 53 | 54 | 55 | 56 | 57 | 58 ||

||Char/RPG||
STR: 57 || DEX: 59 || STA: 52 || CON: 47 || WIS: 59 || CHA: 59

 

Link to comment

The time an hour or so before bed gives me problems as well. It's not enough time to actually start an activity, but too much to just laze around a bit or go to bed slightly earlier. I don't want to stretch/roll around for an entire hour, and if I start reading I'm often going to bed later than planned. My body is weird as well, it now craves a nap during the afternoon and also tells me it's time for bed way too early.

Link to comment
On 9/29/2019 at 7:30 AM, Mad Hatter said:

Funny you should mention that!

First some background: For the past few months I've been completely unable to help out, I've been too mentally incapacitated. But once I started feeling better I realised that while I genuinely did want to help, I also really did not want to write code. There were so many occasions were I would sit down in front of the computer, open up the software, and immediately I'd get unhappy and anxious and guilty and all of those bad things. It felt like doing your least favourite chores, but worse. Don't get me wrong, I think that code can be a cool tool, it just... doesn't excite me. And when I already do it for a living, the idea of spending my precious spare time doing something I only don't mind, it's too much. I won't get into the "what the hell what do I want to do with me life, except not this" part of the thought process, but it's strongly linked. I told A all of this a short while back, and that I didn't know for how long this feeling would last. Which I felt shitty about, but he's really understanding and he wants me to enjoy the process, otherwise what's the point?

 

Of course we were still talking about the project, and I've been trying to be helpful in a supporting role. A's been feeling unusually overwhelmed by the next steps, so I suggested we'd meet up for a chat, which we did just yesterday. Our discussions are always quite interesting, while we both work in the same field, it often feels like we're living on different planets when it comes to tech. :D We discussed many things, one of them which was marketing, and this is where perhaps I could be helpful. We decided it'd be neat to write a series of articles that would be partly indirect marketing, but mainly they'd provide useful content. There might be one or two things that I could write from scratch, but the main bulk of the ideas would have to come from A. However I told him that what we could try is if he wrote a crappy first draft, or even a brain dump, I could try to turn it into a proper article, which would significantly speed up the process. Now, I haven't written anything except email since I wrote my masters thesis in physics, but it's at least a skill that would be interesting to learn! :) 

 

Thanks for the update. I've been curious too :) 

Link to comment
On 9/29/2019 at 7:30 AM, Mad Hatter said:

Now, I haven't written anything except email since I wrote my masters thesis in physics, but it's at least a skill that would be interesting to learn! :) 

Cool! interesting! All the writing <3

 

On 9/29/2019 at 7:50 AM, Mad Hatter said:

When I got home I started jotting down ideas for an article and before I knew it I had most of the structure down.

Not quite as cool, not I'm a bit jelly :P

 

Main Quest: becoming a decent kettlebell lifter and a great coach

Current challenge: KB Girl's next turning of the wheel

my instagram - my gym's instagram

Link to comment

Aghh, yes. We lost so much sunlight in the last month. 

 

Fun that you're going to be writing marketing articles! 

 

And lol at your CEO sleeping at the office. It sounds like you guys were definitely not the weird ones. 

Raptron, alot assassin

67666564636261605958 575655545352515049484746454443424140393837363534333231302928272625242322212019181716151413121110987 | 6 | 5 | 4 | 3 | 2 | 1

Link to comment
On 10/1/2019 at 7:37 AM, darkfoxx said:

That gap drive me nuts too - sun sets here 5:30/6-ish for most of the year through and it’s weird.

It’s also hot, so that’s got my body all confused - enough so that I’m vaguely shocked when my glasses fog up when taking the dogs out right after sunset. emoji38.png

Here it sets between 3 pm and 11 pm which is weird in a different way. :D 

 

Haha that would get me very confused too. :P 

 

19 hours ago, Waanie said:

The time an hour or so before bed gives me problems as well. It's not enough time to actually start an activity, but too much to just laze around a bit or go to bed slightly earlier. I don't want to stretch/roll around for an entire hour, and if I start reading I'm often going to bed later than planned. My body is weird as well, it now craves a nap during the afternoon and also tells me it's time for bed way too early.

I guess it's normal this time of year, but it's still super annoying!

 

18 hours ago, Tobbe said:

Thanks for the update. I've been curious too :) 

I feel quite lame about it tbh. Maybe it would be different without a full time job that I find dumb.

 

16 hours ago, KB Girl said:

Cool! interesting! All the writing <3

 

Not quite as cool, not I'm a bit jelly :P

Interesting, we'll see about cool. :P I might end up hating it haha.

 

Well, that part is easy, turning manic incomprehensible scribbles will be the hard part!

 

14 hours ago, raptron said:

Fun that you're going to be writing marketing articles! 

  

And lol at your CEO sleeping at the office. It sounds like you guys were definitely not the weird ones. 

We'll see! I'm not sure if I'll like it, but at least it's something new and different for me and a way that I can be helpful.

 

Let's just say, weirdness is not mutually exclusive. :P 

 

8 hours ago, Tobbe said:

Love the deep window sill! I've always wanted windows you could sit and read a book in Book

Me too! My window sill is not that deep, it's deep enough to put a bunch of junk on it, but far from wide enough to be able to sit in it. 

Link to comment

I screwed up. I got back from handstand class, and needed to confirm that a work update was working as expected. Before I knew it, it was 10 pm and I was still sitting by my computer, trying to solve a problem which had been driving me crazy during the day! :hopelessness: I don't even know what happened in between, I have no recollection of even switching software, all I had planned to do was check a few logs for five minutes...

Link to comment
I screwed up. I got back from handstand class, and needed to confirm that a work update was working as expected. Before I knew it, it was 10 pm and I was still sitting by my computer, trying to solve a problem which had been driving me crazy during the day! :hopelessness: I don't even know what happened in between, I have no recollection of even switching software, all I had planned to do was check a few logs for five minutes...
It happens. Can you leave earlier another day? Or take longer breaks?

Challenges: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8

Link to comment
22 hours ago, Diadhuit said:
23 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:
I screwed up. I got back from handstand class, and needed to confirm that a work update was working as expected. Before I knew it, it was 10 pm and I was still sitting by my computer, trying to solve a problem which had been driving me crazy during the day! :hopelessness: I don't even know what happened in between, I have no recollection of even switching software, all I had planned to do was check a few logs for five minutes...

It happens. Can you leave earlier another day? Or take longer breaks?

Oh absolutely, my work place is super chill. :) 

  • Like 2
Link to comment

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

New here? Please check out our Privacy Policy and Community Guidelines