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ElizeElvinFoxRyder - Running with the dogs


MrsVan

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Running with the Dogs

 

Tired Elize sank down to a shady spot under an Acacia tree, next to her three canine companions. They were deep in the African bush. The dry, dusty African bush. Her assignment was to find and stop the Malicious Monkeys Troop that has been infected by Maltazard. Her three companions each had a very special ability: the first with the wisdom of the ages, the second had the curiosity of the young, eager minded, and the third had the strength of the loyal protector. She herself was half human, half elf, with the lanky athleticism of the elves, their acute hearing too, but the strength of the humans. What she lacked in agility, she made up for in tenacity. She'll keep going at her task. Her blond locks was cut short, standing every which way. Her fingers had tunneled through it so many times, ruffling the locks to make a little bit of cool air to dry off the rivulets of sweat streaming down her face.

 

Rosy, the curious Maltese canine, had been sniffing, leading them along the scent trail for hours. She was still nose to the ground, hunting for that whiff of odour that would give them a new trail to follow. Warily Elize made a cup with her one hand, filling it with water from the flask, for the companions to drink from. They were all weary and hot. The other canines noisily slurped up the precious liquid. They had to catch the monkeys and rid them of this new virus before it infected the other animals, driving them stark raving mad, sending them on rampages around bush and camps alike. It was one thing looking at the devastation that a troop of monkeys rushing through a camp could cause, quite another watching a herd of elephant, or rhino! They had to tranq the lead monkey, known locally as The One with the Evil Eye. Rosy took a noisy drink of water as well, before slumping down between Missy and Zuzu, chests heaving, tongues lolling pink against the dry, yellow grass. Just a quick respite before they go on.

 

Late afternoon found them nearing a stand of trees on a small hillside. In the hollow below huge boulders formed an enclosed area. It was the third time that they passed this place, in as many hours. The MM Troop seemed to be running in circles from a stand of fruit trees (which were planted by migrating humans years ago), to a water hole in a slowly meandering stream, back to a copse of thorny, num-num bushes full of sour red berries, spread out around another rocky outcrop close by. This rocky, cave like area they were at now, would be ideal as base camp. Elize quickly gathered dry, broken branches for a campfire later that night. Upon closer investigation they found a small trickle of clean, fresh water dripping off the rocks in a shady spot, forming a small pool, before slowly disappearing under another rock slab. This would be a mighty fine spot indeed. As she made camp, securing the area, then settling in to make dinner, Elize heard the soft, distant sounds of African drums beating the air. The doof-doof rhythm had a calming effect right at that moment, but she knew from experience that when the rhythm changed, became faster, louder, it sent out a totally different message over the African bush.

 

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I woke up to someone playing this drum sound in our street the other morning. Probably a driver by, sharing his music. It gave me the idea for the theme, and if you know Jumanji, then you know that at one stage monkeys caused a lot of trouble. We are used to Vervet monkeys causing all kinds of mischief in our area. We have two troops living here, swinging and traipsing through the trees, screeching loudly to chase the other troop away when spotted. They do have a couple lookouts who are always on duty. One particular troop is very naughty, habitually stealing food and fruit from our neighbour's kitchen, tearing open bags of pet food, lounging and defecating on their stoep furniture. They even swam in their pool at one stage! Our neighbours don't have dogs. Our three dogs (Missy, Zuzu, and Rosy) are constantly running (not Zuzu so much though) out of the house chasing monkeys that dare come too close. I'm not really going to hunt down and tranquilise the monkeys (that's against the law anyway), but I'm going to try and 'run with the dogs' once a week, for a bit of extra exercise, and to try and get Zuzu a little more active.

 

Otherwise it is business as usual: My challenge will be about de-stressing (personal me time), doing monthly finances, exercising, and watching my food intake. I have been reading the book "Kick your Fat in the Nuts, by T.C. Hale, and he was so friendly as to send me a personal email pointing out some causes for health issues I told him about. I listened to radio broadcasts from his show on various issues (skin problems - Rocco, Adam, and Brandt, gout - Brandt, acid reflux - me, and other minor ailments), to help balance your body and get the 'machine' working right, before attempting to loose weight. After Brandt and I discussed it, we decided that we really didn't want to get too deep into all the nitty-gritty of bodily functions, but to just focus on probable vitamin, mineral, deficiencies and such for now. In general we are healthy, and most of our problems are gone, except for small issues.

 

So...

:dog: De-stress: Meaning personal time breathing, OR lying down, OR sitting outside to relax, OR pray/talk for at least 10min. at a time. Just let my mind go, no reading, no games, no chatting, except when praying/talking to Father. At least 3x per week.

:dog: Finances: Do monthly finances. At least August's and September's.

:dog: Burpees: Twice a week at least (Tuesdays, and Thursdays), but third time on Saturdays would be tops. Every burpee in which I do a full push up, counts towards my pushup count to reach 200 cumulative over these challenges. I am currently at 121 full pushups.

:dog: Walking: Try for at least the long one of the two walks a week - long one on Wednesdays, and short one on Thursdays.

:dog: Dog run: Yep... try for some old fun (obstacle) training at home on a Friday afternoon. Get Zuzu running around with us a bit. Get me to lift my butt and moving every day for 10min. but especially with Zuzu.

:dog: Food:

  • Gluten-free, low on starch, carbs, and sugar: I can have one piece of special coconut oil chocolate treats, once a week. Fruit are not a problem as long as I don't have more than two a day. I'll be using my old Banting portion sizes.
  • Water/Tea - have to keep this here. Equal to 2Lt/day.
  • Coffee: no more than 4 mugs a day (back to small mug size). Only one mug with cream, the other with milk.

:dog: Measurements: Weigh in first thing on a Monday morning, and take down measurements.

 

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Mrs. Van's Latest Challenge

 

 

Zechariah 4:6

"Not by might, nor by power, but by My spirit, saith the Lord."

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Following with or without monkeys.

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"By the Most-Righteous-and-Blessed Beard of Sir Tanktimus the Encourager!" - Jarl Rurik Harrgath

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I changed the dog run idea. I need to get Zuzu running around a bit on most days, and not overdo it on one day. So the boys and I will endeavour to be outside with Zuzu for at least 10min. after school, throwing sticks, balls, playing chase, etc. to get us all moving a little bit. If this works out I can start leash training again in a while.

 

Also:

  • This Wednesday there won't be Lego, so I'll take the boys either to Lion Park (drive), or to Queen Elizabeth nature reserve (walk) to watch animals. Adam's choice.
  • This Friday is Adam's 13th birthday. From last year (when I thought he was a teenager) till now (that it is official) the teenage hormones have started and he has been 'turning' for the last couple months. :D Finally a teenager in the house. I love how his voice is sometimes deep, sometimes squeaky :D :love_heart:.
  • Last weekend of the challenge we are going up to Sabie again, leaving on the Friday, only returning on the Tuesday.

Otherwise things should be as usual I think :confused:

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Mrs. Van's Latest Challenge

 

 

Zechariah 4:6

"Not by might, nor by power, but by My spirit, saith the Lord."

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14 hours ago, Sloth the Enduring said:

Following for monkeys.

I took a couple photos for you this morning. Will sort through them to see what actually shows monkeys. They've been playing on the climbing frame, hunting insects on our grass, and in general just up to monkey business. Good monkey business, not like next door. The dogs came rushing out, ran around like crazy for a bit, then decided to congregate on the steps to watch monkey business in action.

10 hours ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

Following with or without monkeys.

There aren't always monkey business afoot, sometimes it will be dog or human business. As long as it doesn't all go to the apes.

4 hours ago, Xena said:

Love the dog run idea!

I changed it quite a lot. Instead of having one day of exercise for me, trying to entice Zuzu to jog along, we'll try to get him running and playing with us outside for 10min. every weekday. He is such a nice dog, that the once I tried walking him in the street, he almost freaked out because of the other dogs in their gardens, barking and going crazy. So I'll stick to our garden for now. Rosy is really the inquisitive little bundle. She is always sniffing around, jumping after and hunting geckos or lizards. I don't think there is a corner in the garden that she hasn't sniffed out and know the secrets of. Missy... she sometimes gets Zuzu up and out to play. It is great to see! She never had that with our previous dogs when she was a young dog, as the Jack Russel totally dominated her, and would try to bite her if she wanted to play. Scolding didn't help, so I eventually gave up. Now she is catching up in her old age, playing with Zuzu.

 

I'll still try to get a bit of extra movement in when outside with Zuzu, it just won't be my focus.

 

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Mrs. Van's Latest Challenge

 

 

Zechariah 4:6

"Not by might, nor by power, but by My spirit, saith the Lord."

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Fun challenge! Do you feel a difference when you eat gluten free?

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Elastigirl Endeavors, Experiments, , and Explains - Current Challenge: May 9 to June 12 - Nerd Fitness Rebellion

"If more of us valued food and cheer and song, above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world" J.R.R.Tolkien

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2 hours ago, Elastigirl said:

Fun challenge! Do you feel a difference when you eat gluten free?

First... did you start a new challenge? I don't know why but I never followed your previous challenge, or unfollowed, or something? Would like to find the new one, please.

 

Gluten free is a bit of a mixed nut at this stage. I really feel that when I eat gluten I struggle with sinus a lot more, but at the moment the wind blows so much, and it is so dry, that I have bad sinus from the dust anyway. Also, if I haven't eaten gluten for a while (like a couple weeks) and suddenly have something like a sandwich, then I get cramps after that first meal. And I definitely feel a lot more bloated when I've had gluten. But those are just observations that I realised at some point of either having gone gluten free for a while, or had more gluten. I think I'm a bit like Rocco that I have a level that I need to cross before things become particularly noticeable? I remember from the years before when we went GF, I hardly got sick. Maybe a little cold here or there, but definitely no flu or the like. And the same for the boys and Brandt on GF too. They were almost never seriously sick. Maybe a bit of a cold (3 days and it's over), but nothing serious.

 

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Almost had an incident today. When our gardener left he told me that there were three young 'woonga' guys (drugs/weed mix users) who tried to climb our front fence this morning, while I was in town. He had left some of the gardening tools (including the lawnmower, and extension cable) in the front part of the yard (main gate was locked, but tools were fully visible from the street), while having breakfast in the back. He said after breakfast he walked to the front to continue and found these three young guys trying to climb our fence (still on the outside), but they were unsteady and struggling. He chased them off. I impressed on him again that he should never leave tools out in the open like that, as it is a clear 'invite' for things like that to happen. There had been three burglaries over the weekend where peoples' tools were stolen, or garages broken into and garden and other tools stolen. He didn't really believe me before, but now he's seen it with his own eyes. My boys were inside the house, doing math, security gates closed, and didn't see a thing! I actually drove past the three guys when I got close to the house coming back from town, but hadn't known at that stage what they'd attempted to do.

 

It started raining very softly this afternoon, which means it had cooled down considerably too. We had a small hail storm over the weekend too, and then yesterday were terribly hot again.

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Mrs. Van's Latest Challenge

 

 

Zechariah 4:6

"Not by might, nor by power, but by My spirit, saith the Lord."

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what a Great story!  ofc I'm following.  What do the monkey's symbolize?  chaos? stress? negative vibes,etc out in SA??

 

I'd ask what your heroine intends to do, once she catches up on the monkeys- but I think that maybe cheating and thats why we Stay tuned.

to allow you to draw us into your unique story

 

at any rate; I'm glad to see nothing came of the attempted buglary.

 

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https://rebellion.nerdfitness.com/index.php?/topic/116426-im-awake/

the "NEW" normal is good with me! as Life was Never really Normal anyways....

 

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11 hours ago, TGP said:

what a Great story!  ofc I'm following.  What do the monkey's symbolize?  chaos? stress? negative vibes,etc out in SA??

Great to have you here again!

Honestly... consciously I didn't think of it as anything other than the obvious. Now that I think about it, the symbolism and the comparisons to our country and current life situation... is scary accurate. I'm trying to tread a fine line between leading a normal life, while yet being super vigilant, protecting my family and making the right decisions for us. Also not to hope/focus so much on leaving, that I can't see the good that is still here, because then I'll become so depressed and feel so hopeless, I won't be able to cope. Because even though we really want to leave, we are still here, and we still need to live here. We can't become totally negative, but it is a constant battle. I think that is what keeps people here, starting Fb groups like "I am staying!" because a big part of us love this country and our people. The little traditions, the little things like the 'African handshake'. We understand the psyche, but we expect better from a modern government.

 

Spoiler

 

The drums are definitely giving the rhythm. Things are building and tensions are rising. We are mostly holding our breaths to see which way things are going.

 

There are the groups of people (symbolised by the monkeys) who go out and riot, loot, steal, attack others, all because of some false propaganda (the virus), they've been fed, and no matter how many times you tell them the truth, show them the truth, they won't listen. There are government officials who talk the talk, and say nice things (we'll stop corruption), but when their colleagues are accused, they change the "Commission of Inquiry" to another group, appoint other people, and start the whole thing from scratch. These government officials (from the president down to most of the ministers, and even so far down as the mayors of cities and towns, and a lot of people working in government institutions) all get their cut. They steal from the people, make the 'monkeys' even more angry, and the circle continues.

It was a great day when we heard that the USA Treasury had put sanctions on the Gupta family, as they basically controlled our government through the previous president, and still had their fingers in various pies here. Now we are waiting for USA Treasury to finish their investigations, because some of the names mentioned on their 'list of suspects' are our government officials (like the ex-president) who are not taken to task here in the country.

 

Then you have law enforcement (symbolised by the dogs and I)... Statistics show that the police force is the most corrupt government department in the country at the moment. You only trust police you know personally (like our neighbour and some policemen at the shooting club). Police are even involved in some instances in killing farmers, kidnapping children, drug trades. There are horrible stories coming out now about some people innocently thrown in a holding cell overnight, being raped and tortured, and then the next day everyone in that holding cell is set free, and the person has no evidence except the horrible injuries. And nothing comes of it, because he is threatened by the same people who threw him in jail. Other law enforcement agencies, or commissions who have to investigate corruption charges, are hampered. They hand in evidence, and it gets way-laid, or disappears, or witnesses are murdered (assassination is apparently big under some political parties). Or the commission is stopped, the people heading up the investigations are changed, and suddenly they can't find clear evidence of corruption. So those who are trying to do the right thing, are also in danger from their colleagues, they are hampered, their hands tied (figuratively).

 

Then there are the beauty - everyday people striving to do their best, going on, helping each other. Doing what they can to make this place better. There is the country and nature itself which is still stunning; people of all cultures coming together to help the drought stricken farmers (especially in our Free State and Northern Cape provinces) donating money, water and/or animal feed to keep these farmers going, (because government help is non-existent, even though government officials proclaim it has been given); projects are started everywhere to get people on their feet, companies are starting education programmes for those who come out of high school, but still can't read or write, to find a job in that company (although this is only available to the majority group, and none of the minorities); other private people are climbing in and helping minority groups where they can. People coming together to rid nature reserves of traps and saving animals where they can, as they are being hunted illegally. Food programmes... And just in general, people going about their daily lives, just being nice to one another, like waving and greeting your neighbours. Helping to make the community safer.

 

But I guess overhead the drums are still beating, and everyone are holding their breath, waiting for what we think is inevitable. Or just plain hoping, or just plain ignoring and preferring to be ignorant, to be able to cope.

 

4 hours ago, Tova the Vibrant said:

Hey lady!

I'm super stoked to be back and following again. 

Your title makes me think of one of the songs from my dance class:

That's a beautiful song. It made me remember that movie of Kevin Costner (yeah, dating myself :D ) Dancing with Wolves.

 

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First news: I received a reply from the immigration agency giving us a link to pay via card, which will be more expensive, but immediate. Like placing a very big, expensive order with Amazon. Otherwise the whole international money transfer transaction will take in excess of 5 working days. The banking fees of transferring that amount of money internationally will come to about the same amount, I think. So it is much the same in the end. Will look at it this afternoon.

 

Week 1 - Monday:

:dog: De-stress: Had a little less than 10min. last night. The boys for some or other reason kept getting up, until I told them straight, 'listen, I need to have a couple minutes alone, by myself, in quiet, just to let go, get rid of some built up stress, and relax.' They got in bed. Called out a couple minutes later asking whether I'll come say good night to them again, which I did, and then showered and got in bed myself. They stayed awake chatting some more; I almost closed their door, so that it wouldn't bother us (their talking and light still on), and promptly fell fast asleep.

:dog: Finances: Dailies, no monthlies. Have it scheduled for Wednesday-Friday this week, next week and then two weeks after that.

:dog: Burpees: Nothing, because I used that hour and half to vacuum and wash the floors. Also dusted/polished furniture.

  • Pushups: Count starts at 121.

:dog: Walking: Hope to walk on Wednesday, but I'm not sure because of the weather, and Adam and Rocco wants to go swim at Francoisana's house (depending on the weather). So no walking on Monday.

:dog: Dog run: Zuzu ran... because monkeys! and part of it was because I went outside taking photos, so all three dogs were in protector mode, but not because I tried to get him to run by playing with him. So Zuzu 1 - Elize 0.

:dog: Food:

  • No/Low Gluten, Starch, Sugar: Had chocolate, and milo. No starch (pasta, potatoes, rice, etc.) or gluten.
  • Water/Tea: One bottle of water, some vitamin fizzy tablet in a big glass of water that had a little bit of added sugar, some milk - total just below 2Lt.
  • Coffee: 2x cream (early morning, last one at night - because we forgot about no cream later) 2x milk.

:dog: Measurements: Weight is back up to 99kg. No surprise there. Measurements surprisingly are still down.

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Zechariah 4:6

"Not by might, nor by power, but by My spirit, saith the Lord."

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@Sloth the Enduring: As promised... monkey business, although these photos don't show them up to mischief.

Top left: you can see two monkeys on our lawn. There were about 5 more in the big avo tree right at the back, and another 5-8 (which I could see to count) in the group of trees on the right hand side of our property (not in the photo).

Top right: That one monkey jumping after a cricket or something.

Middle left: Missy photo bombing the monkey pics. You can just see behind her (in her mouth's area) one of the monkeys getting on the climbing frame. Missy was totally focussed on a group of monkeys off to our right, deciding whether to join their comrades in their fun.

Middle right: Stampy and the Three Musketeers. Zuzu going down to greet Stampy. Rosy looking at me, and Missy, not very fond of Stampy being so close to her, but at least she doesn't growl at him anymore.

Bottom: Three monkeys that can be seen, two or three more, lazing on the black mat out of sight. Check the one middle left, who was watching me from underneath a beam. A couple seconds before he had been swinging on one of those yellow ropes. Rocco says he's seen them pushing those ropes between the beams to the middle open area between the A-frame to swing.

On our property this troop just go about their daily monkey business. Next door they apparently cause chaos. I don't know why they act so differently, except maybe the dogs keep them somewhat in check, but as you can see, they aren't overly afraid of the dogs either. Safety in numbers?

 

1518370528_monkeybusiness.thumb.jpg.203a83979e8bb9259fa3ab89253aef16.jpg

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Mrs. Van's Latest Challenge

 

 

Zechariah 4:6

"Not by might, nor by power, but by My spirit, saith the Lord."

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Just another short note: we aren't on load shedding at the moment (maybe later this month) but for some or other reason our internet connection is very slow at times. I'm struggling to load pictures then, and even struggle to post. If I have a problem when commenting on your thread, I'll come back later to try and redo it. Just so you guys know. But I shouldn't disappear.

 

Another short note: I just had to push the 'pay' button on PayPal, to pay the immigration agency. It is A LOT of money. My hand actually shook before pressing. Man, this is nerve wracking if I haven't said it before.

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Zechariah 4:6

"Not by might, nor by power, but by My spirit, saith the Lord."

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Proud of your bravery and faith

 

you will Definitely have a safer life in NZ.  I'm sure of that...

 

"monkeys" ...  very interesting.  can't exactly tell; but closer are they kind of cute?

ofc "cute" or not; clearly they can cause problems

 

I'm glad they've decided to behave when they invade your little homestead.

 

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6 hours ago, ElizeElvinFoxRyder said:

Just another short note: we aren't on load shedding at the moment (maybe later this month) but for some or other reason our internet connection is very slow at times. I'm struggling to load pictures then, and even struggle to post. If I have a problem when commenting on your thread, I'll come back later to try and redo it. Just so you guys know. But I shouldn't disappear.

 

Another short note: I just had to push the 'pay' button on PayPal, to pay the immigration agency. It is A LOT of money. My hand actually shook before pressing. Man, this is nerve wracking if I haven't said it before.

So proud of you Elize!

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Current Challenge: The Adventures of Rhovaniel: Vol I

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Run 3 Laps of Oblivion| Run and Complete Man vs Lakes | Achieve a full pull up| Achieve 10+ unbroken push ups| Write 90,000+ words of a novel (0/90,000)| Read at least 20 books (4/20)

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20 hours ago, TGP said:

Proud of your bravery and faith

 

you will Definitely have a safer life in NZ.  I'm sure of that...

 

"monkeys" ...  very interesting.  can't exactly tell; but closer are they kind of cute?

ofc "cute" or not; clearly they can cause problems

 

I'm glad they've decided to behave when they invade your little homestead.

 

 

14 hours ago, Sloth the Enduring said:

 


Monkeys are always cute.

 

image.png.ad96254e07b158b132fab86f44903506.png  image.thumb.png.b6d35386a5c4b51e3be1562c425de248.png

We have vervet monkeys in our area. This is basically what they look like from up close. Size-wise, like a baby to about 40-50cm. They are cute (to some extend), mischievous, playful and rather clever. They are also dangerous, and a full grown adult wouldn't hesitate to catch a kitten or puppy for mealtime, but that doesn't happen often. They mostly go for fruit (sometimes vegetables) and insects. Adults are very protective of their young, and I've been intimidated a couple times in years past when I tried to exercise in our back garden, but a mom had other ideas. They'll storm, screech, and bare their teeth, then you better move, because at some point they will attack, or you have to act bigger, louder and more threatening than they are. I think I answered a challenge once, and then decided that discretion was the better part of valor. Once some young ones went for my pink water bottle, probably thinking it a flower or fruit. They've stolen fruit out of our house a couple times, but not within the last two years I think? Because we are now very aware of them, and the young dogs quickly chase them away from anywhere close to the doors.

 

14 hours ago, Rhovaniel said:

So proud of you Elize!

:love_heart: Things seem to be going along Brandt's original time frame. He didn't want to leave South Africa before Dec.2019 anyway. But at least I'm very sure this is what he wants too. At first when we started talking seriously about it (a year ago), he kept pushing the date that we would like to seriously go over back. From April, to July, to Oct, and then he said he isn't moving before Dec. But now with the changes the government is still implementing and the changes they have in line, he is set to leave.

 

We are basically visa ready, meaning if he gets a job offer today, we can lodge visa applications tomorrow. Things can then happen very quickly, only depending on how fast our visas are processed (anything between 2weeks to 4 months), and the sale of our house. But all depends on a job offer; we can't go if he doesn't have a job. There might be the chance of him having to go to NZ to get interviews and a job offer. There might also be the situation (most likely in all probability) that he'll have to go over first, as soon as possible, and the kids and I have to follow later. We now know all the likelihoods, but won't really know what is going to happen until it actually transpires. Sometimes I feel like crying because of all the uncertainty, sometimes I feel like giving up (but we haven't even really started trying). Sometimes I want to cry or pull my hair out (too sore!) because of frustrations and the fact that things aren't seemingly going anywhere. Nothing like learning some patience ... again...

 

We are also still not talking about it in person as Brandt's two bosses (the companies he contracts for), is very negative, and might cancel his contracts, stating they don't know whether they can depend on him (and selling programme information pfft, but they call it intellectual property assurance, or something like that). So I don't mention it on Fb, and only a handful of people know about our plans here in Pietermaritzburg. Actually more people know about it internationally (NF) than people IRL. :D Brandt's one close friend from rally racing is leaving end of November. His wife has a job in NZ, he doesn't, but he is a mechanic, so has had job offers already. Two of his colleagues have left earlier this year. Our neighbours have stopped their process due to health issues. Our other neighbours have started a 2yr plan, for the husband to finish his degree in policing/security (he is a police officer), then he'll go over first, and his wife will follow when he has things sorted out (might take 6m-1yr further - if all works out). So... here's hoping and praying. Sorry, this is all probably old news by now. It just helps to talk and get some of the stress off me. Just skip if you've read before :D .

 

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Week 1 - Tuesday:

:dog: De-stress: Some time waiting for Rocco during fencing, and some time last night.

:dog: Finances: Going to start now! Promise!

:dog: Burpees: Did 3x5, of which 2 - 2 - 3 were full push ups.

  • Pushups: 121 + 7Tu

:dog: Walking: None. It's been cloudy, then open, then cloudy with very light mist rain, then open, so we decided not to go out walking in case it starting raining in earnest.

:dog: Dog run: Zuzu jumped around with us in the house (while we tried valiantly to do burpees). Didn't go out at 12 as I had to rush to the butchery, to be back in time.  So Zuzu 2. This is hard to remember, to actually go outside and get him moving. I guess it doesn't really matter whether it is outside or inside?

:dog: Food:

  • No/Low Gluten, Starch, Sugar: Sugar!
  • Water/Tea: Same as yesterday, total just below 2Lt.
  • Coffee: 1x cream; and max 4 mugs!

:dog: Measurements: Will weigh and measure every Monday morning.

 

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The boys' friend D is coming to 'play' here this afternoon again (meaning they are all going to sit and play on a separate computer/xbox, not really play with each other, as we know play), but only for an hour in between his extra-murals. I'm really having a hard time liking (or trying to get along with) his grandmother to tell the truth. I don't know whether it is just me, but she has an opinion on everything (she's frequently on the community group giving her opinion on everything, and she usually knows better). She also asked again whether I couldn't change the boys' school around (give them one or two mornings off this week) so that they could have time to play with D. I told her again, sorry, but no. Maybe my problem stems from me being much more aware of my boundaries; or maybe I'm just unhappy with someone who wants to mess with my arrangements (and I don't want extra hassle)?; maybe we are two people in charge, rubbing up wrong against each other?; but I have a problem with this. I've never had another HS parent ask me (or me ask someone else) to change school schedules/extra-murals to suite them for play time for the kids. Yes, I've chopped and changed our schedule, and I do shift things around to get other things done which I deem important, so why does this rub me up the wrong way? Am I full of myself and my ways/things?

 

I better go; start with finances; get some things done before the noise starts.

 

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Zechariah 4:6

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Guys, I'm upset. D came to play here, and he tried to get the boys to play some of their games with cheat codes. I know some people don't take it seriously at all and ask, so what's the harm, but we really don't like it. And I told him the last couple times that he was here, but then I tried to stay calm and talk nicely about it. Today I just got upset. Firstly because he tried to get the boys to cheat behind my back, while I was in the kitchen. Rocco turned around and said he doesn't think that's a good idea, they don't use cheat codes, they play games as is. We basically have an open-plan front area, so I heard every word.

 

I went through to them and told him that we don't use cheat codes in this house, that you play the game to the best of your ability, and you try and try again. He just gave me this look. Adam then said, "yeah my mom is big on not cheating, and doing things by the book". He looked at Adam and I could feel the emotion building up inside me. I tried to explain to him that if you cheat in a game you are basically cheating yourself, because you aren't using the potential you have been born with, because you are just looking for an easy way out. You aren't looking for other solutions to the problem, to succeeding. So what if you can't reach the top levels of a game? At least where ever you reach you have earned. You can't say, "oh I'm so good at this game" if you can't play the game without cheating. Then he said but then he can't play a lot of games past certain levels because he can't play them without cheating, and he isn't cheating in online games or against other people, he just uses the cheat codes in single player mode. I told him it doesn't matter, it means he is doing something morally wrong against himself.

 

They went on to play on XBox, but he then couldn't show the boys something he had been bragging about, because he needed the cheat codes for it. He told Rocco then softly that at his house his mom doesn't mind. I told him then that at his house it's his mom's rules, if she actually knew he was cheating. He looked me straight in the eyes, but didn't say a word. I told him then that I was really serious, and it upset me, and if he continuous to cheat here, or get the boys to cheat, I am going to stop the friendship. He still just looked at me for a bit, then turned away.

 

I guess I overreacted to the situation, but... the boys say they understand and they assured me they don't use cheat codes.

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I like that Rocco/Adam was on board and kept the house rules despite probably some pretty big social strain on him to bend.

 

I'm guessing this has been more than a passing issue with this kid.

that's unfortunate. and I understand your concern.

 

IMHO Its actually much Worse that "D" is trying to pressure your kids in doing something they know they are not allowed to do.   this speaks of outright flouting authority and I'm proud your boys didn't bend to that.

----
 

this is a tough part of growing up (from one parent to another) as not all the kids around your kids are good influences.  you can and should intervene in some cases but in others- its better for your kids to develop the ability to develop friendships that are wholesome and picks friends that are good influences.

 

Like so many things in parenting; you only have so much influence in that...

 

but I think you've been doing a great job as a parent and I have hopes this will be resolved in a good way

 

PS

with one kid at 21 and another now 18... you'd be shocked how Little influence I have on my kids anymore.

that is why this little lesson is so important as you can STILL have alot of influence.

if my oldest daughter had the same situation there would be nothing I could do but share an opinion...

 

 

 

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https://rebellion.nerdfitness.com/index.php?/topic/116426-im-awake/

the "NEW" normal is good with me! as Life was Never really Normal anyways....

 

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On 10/29/2019 at 2:57 AM, ElizeElvinFoxRyder said:

Zuzu is SOOO cute! Love little long dogs :D

 

20 hours ago, Sloth the Enduring said:

Monkeys are always cute.

 

10000% disagree. Not cute.

 

6 hours ago, ElizeElvinFoxRyder said:

We are basically visa ready, meaning if he gets a job offer today, we can lodge visa applications tomorrow. Things can then happen very quickly, only depending on how fast our visas are processed (anything between 2weeks to 4 months), and the sale of our house. But all depends on a job offer; we can't go if he doesn't have a job. There might be the chance of him having to go to NZ to get interviews and a job offer. There might also be the situation (most likely in all probability) that he'll have to go over first, as soon as possible, and the kids and I have to follow later. We now know all the likelihoods, but won't really know what is going to happen until it actually transpires. Sometimes I feel like crying because of all the uncertainty, sometimes I feel like giving up (but we haven't even really started trying). Sometimes I want to cry or pull my hair out (too sore!) because of frustrations and the fact that things aren't seemingly going anywhere. Nothing like learning some patience ... again...

You have done so much work to get you and your family here. Anytime I hear about something from SA I think about you. I know this is super stressful, and am glad you have stress reducing in your challenge.

 

6 hours ago, ElizeElvinFoxRyder said:

She also asked again whether I couldn't change the boys' school around (give them one or two mornings off this week) so that they could have time to play with D. I told her again, sorry, but no. Maybe my problem stems from me being much more aware of my boundaries; or maybe I'm just unhappy with someone who wants to mess with my arrangements (and I don't want extra hassle)?; maybe we are two people in charge, rubbing up wrong against each other?; but I have a problem with this. I've never had another HS parent ask me (or me ask someone else) to change school schedules/extra-murals to suite them for play time for the kids. Yes, I've chopped and changed our schedule, and I do shift things around to get other things done which I deem important, so why does this rub me up the wrong way? Am I full of myself and my ways/things?

I absolutely do not think you are full of yourself. I don't know much about kids, but I know from my Autistic brother that structure and schedule is super important (at 26 he basically acts like a preteen still in so many ways). Changing your HS schedule for play interrupts that set plan and the regularity that folks (adults and kids alike) really need.

 

1 hour ago, TGP said:

IMHO Its actually much Worse that "D" is trying to pressure your kids in doing something they know they are not allowed to do.   this speaks of outright flouting authority and I'm proud your boys didn't bend to that.

Agreed.

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D's Grandmother is way out of line. It's ridiculous to expect another family to change things around for her convenience. She's got no boundaries where you are concerned. 

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Nope, you are not overreacting for the grandmother. Remember a while ago when I said I thought manipulating was too strong  a word? Well, now she has had time to prove herself , and she is trying to push you around. And as a former homeschooler, one of my big buttons was people who didn't take my homeschooling seriously and try to push me to change our home school schedule. It is a high priority, if you opt to change it, since it is what you are in charge of that is one thing, but no you don't have to change to please others. I would tell her, no you won't now or ever change it, so please stop asking.

 

Yay for how the boys stood their ground with their friend!

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18 hours ago, TGP said:

I'm guessing this has been more than a passing issue with this kid.

that's unfortunate. and I understand your concern.

 

IMHO Its actually much Worse that "D" is trying to pressure your kids in doing something they know they are not allowed to do.   this speaks of outright flouting authority and I'm proud your boys didn't bend to that.

I tend to doubt myself, thinking I react too strongly about some situations. This boy has caused something every time we've seen him. He tends to still be rude to his grandmother and mother that I heard, but then there tends to be a big difference between what Afrikaans parents allow compared to English parents (here in SA at least). We as Afrikaans people tend to be a lot more conservative and don't allow some laid back way of talking that comes off as rude, from a child to a parent. In a lot of English households I've been in, the kids even call the parents by their names, which is totally out in our home. But this boy is really on the rude side, but not towards me, after I took him to task that first visit. He is rough and sometimes seem to be pushing the boys (like when they played in the pool) for a reaction.

 

I warned the boys now that D's actions show that he disrespects authority and they should really be careful that he doesn't try to manipulate or get them later on to ignore or break our household/moral rules. I also told them that I would prefer for them to see him as little as possible, as I don't think he is a good influence. They said that they do like him and they've told him to pipe down on playing so rough, etc. but they aren't keen to see him regularly either. "He is the type you only have small doses of". My boys continually surprise me, honestly!

 

I told Brandt and his only comment was, it's our house, our rules and if he doesn't like it, he doesn't have to come. But I also don't want to allow our children to go there.

17 hours ago, Tova the Vibrant said:

Zuzu is SOOO cute! Love little long dogs

He is adorable, especially when he pulls that nose up into millions of wrinkles. He isn't growling or aggressive, it is as if he is grinning. The whole body shakes from side to side. I can't believe that I actually didn't really took to him at first. He was Brandt's choice from a photo. The same with Rosy, but now I find their respective personalities adorable! And Missy is my girl. She'll always be mommy's lady.

17 hours ago, Tova the Vibrant said:

You have done so much work to get you and your family here. Anytime I hear about something from SA I think about you. I know this is super stressful, and am glad you have stress reducing in your challenge.

They sent us the rest of the instructions to complete, with regards to documentation. I have to read through everything, then take all the documentation to Postnet to have it scanned properly and put on a stick (USB drive, we call it a stick for short). Then upload to them, and ... we go from there. They first want to get all the documentation 100% done, then they'll help Brandt with applications, CV and cover letters, even if the job advert says "have to be in NZ", or " must have right to work in NZ".

17 hours ago, Tova the Vibrant said:

I absolutely do not think you are full of yourself. I don't know much about kids, but I know from my Autistic brother that structure and schedule is super important (at 26 he basically acts like a preteen still in so many ways). Changing your HS schedule for play interrupts that set plan and the regularity that folks (adults and kids alike) really need.

As I said to TGP above, I sometimes think that I come over too strongly, or that I might be misinterpreting the situation, but when I feel so strongly about this... With the boys, if I take it to cavalier, they get the idea that they only work when they want to, that it isn't a case of every day you have to do your little bit. Yes, you need to be able to make changes and adapt, but for us that comes with priorities - what is more important, and HS kids in general have a lot more free time. Both the boys and I flourish when we have a schedule. Then privately which I obviously didn't want to tell the granny, is that I need us to be on schedule and on top of our work, for when I apply to NZ authorities w.r.t. home schooling. We want to finish up end of November, giving me the whole of December to prepare and get things ready for next year.

15 hours ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

D's Grandmother is way out of line. It's ridiculous to expect another family to change things around for her convenience. She's got no boundaries where you are concerned. 

Thanks Tank. I was wondering whether I'm not being totally unaccommodating, but they generally have this attitude of this is what we want, so we want it. If D asks to play with the boys, then I have to let him play with the boys. As I mentioned before, it is that whole thing that I got the idea this boy doesn't know the word, no.

15 hours ago, Elastigirl said:

one of my big buttons was people who didn't take my homeschooling seriously and try to push me to change our home school schedule.

Yes, this is one of my pet peeves as well, because I'm the one who knows what has been done, still has to be done, and how much time is left in the year. People who HS but do it very informally tend to be like this as well, they expect you to just be as relaxed about it as they are, and others who don't understand the commitment and responsibility we as parents feel, then expect you to just drop it some mornings to have tea with them, or go out somewhere, or say "but you don't do much", or you can catch up another time. I lost some friends about this previously.

15 hours ago, Elastigirl said:

I would tell her, no you won't now or ever change it, so please stop asking.

I actually did tell her over the phone that I wasn't willing to change the boys' time they do school work, adding that we have a tight schedule on which to finish, I don't have another time to catch up on school work as I have other responsibilities then, and she just said "ok, ok, ok".

15 hours ago, Elastigirl said:

Yay for how the boys stood their ground with their friend!

I'm really proud of them. Told them so this morning. Rocco looked at me and said in that tone, the "uggh we know, but she is going to say it again" We know why you reacted as you did, and we'll listen carefully, and won't break the rules. They are not without their own bit of attitude.

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Thanks guys. I tend to doubt my own reactions to situations, thinking that I'm probably overreacting, or am not accommodating enough, selfish. Your answers/advice helps me to get perspective.

 

It's been raining constantly for the last three days. Sometimes hard, sometimes just a cat spit, but almost all three nights through. Our bottom water tanks were almost full this morning before Brandt put the pump on to pump water to the top tank, to supply the house. That is a lot of rain. No riding for Adam today, either.

 

Remember I told you guys how Rocco kept some of the younger kids entertained in between fencing bouts at the competition a couple weeks ago? Well the one parent invited Rocco to her son's birthday party this Saturday. He also fences. It is in the neighbouring town, at a restaurant that caters for children.

 

Brandt is also taking part in another track race Saturday, so he won't be going to the birthday party with us. It is also Adam's birthday tomorrow (Friday), so Brandt and I decided to have a family lunch at a coffee shop tomorrow during his lunch hour. We'll rather give Adam some cash for his birthday, than hold a party. It was his choice. He is big into saving at the moment.

 

Oh crikey we had a tremor just now?! Well about 30min. ago. The boys and I literally felt the house structure shake, not so as anything fell over or such, but it was like a cold shiver. There are talks of an earthquake that hit the Philippines, and that this was the after shock coming through to us; also talks of an underground mine collapsing in the north of our country. Will wait to see what the actual cause was, but that was disconcerting!

 

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Week 1 - Wednesday:

:dog: De-stress: Took some quiet minutes by myself before D came.

:dog: Finances: Did Aug-Sept. Next up Sept-Oct.

:dog: Burpees: Did 3x5, of which 3-2-2 were full push ups.

  • Pushups: 121 + 7Tu + 7We

:dog: Walking: None. Raining on and off.

:dog: Dog run: Played with Zuzu inside. Rocco ran with him some outside, and he ran with me to the gate a couple times when I went to open and close a couple times.

:dog: Food:

  • No/Low Gluten, Starch, Sugar: Yes, none.
  • Water/Tea: About 1.5Lt of water, tea, milk.
  • Coffee: 1x cream; and max 4 mugs! Same.

:dog: Measurements: Will weigh and measure every Monday morning.

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Earthquakes are scary! Hopefully that's all you have. Well done Wednseday.

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