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Mike Wazowski

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18 hours ago, Mike Wazowski said:

❤️ you probably have, but I don't mind hearing it again! ❤️

 

Well, I appreciate you. I know a lot of men who would have met that comment with a "well, actually," and you didn't. Bless.

 

19 hours ago, Mike Wazowski said:

Link (it's spread across a couple posts at the start of the thread - I'd expect that an accomplished aerialist like you would probably be more advanced than I am - apparently I'm squeaking by with weak abs right now in dance):

 

Huh, most of these are part of my aerial warm-up. 😅 Whatever my weaknesses (my pathetic legs, say), I guess I often forget that because of my chosen sport I have a crazy core.

 

19 hours ago, Mike Wazowski said:

Just focus on all the awesome things I'm enjoying in life, don't worry about trying to find a soulmate (or even a just good enough to date for right now person, which I think was my not-high-enough bar recently).

 

Honestly, in my experience, that's the best route. Nothing wrong with finding company for the moment if that's what you're into, but if you're happy doing your own thing, then do that and let life happen. I definitely wasn't looking AT ALL at the time my now-wife and I ended up thrown together by life. I'd say it worked out much better that way.

 

18 hours ago, Mike Wazowski said:

:D indeed!! This'll actually be a sealed deck event, which is probably good for my first foray back since I have ZERO idea what the current set mechanics are and I've kinda forgotten what the different viable archetypes are for limited decks. I'm expecting to get shellacked, laugh about it, and have a good time nerding out with peeps (I used to go to this game store years ago and know the owner is REALLY good at building a solid community).

 

This sounds great! Hope it's really fun!!

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18 hours ago, KB Girl said:

That sounds great! The current set has only been out for a week or two.. and the good thing about limited is that you just go with 16/17 lands, 13/16 creatures and 6/10 spells. Synergy be damned. Never play more than 40 cards and you'll be fine :P 

:lol: so you mean I don't....just shuffle all my cards of all five colors together??? 🤯

 

Haha but in all seriousness, it'll be fun - I'm sure my gameplay will be sloppier than it used to be, as will my deckbuilding - but it'll be fun just to show up and mess around with an old hobby.

 

14 hours ago, Harriet said:

Both of these things sound good in different ways. It's good to know what you want. And it's great that dancing/teaching is going so well. 

:D thank you!! It was a really great thought experiment my therapist plopped onto me - "if the absolute perfect guy were to appear in your life, would you be really excited about dating him?" and the answer was, unfortunately, no - which made it pretty clear I'm due for a dating break.

 

32 minutes ago, starsapart said:

Well, I appreciate you. I know a lot of men who would have met that comment with a "well, actually," and you didn't. Bless.

I try - and occasionally succeed. Can't become a better ally if I can't admit my current shortcomings and all that jazz. It's irksome that my brain immediately pictures a (cis, white, hetero) man when someone says "engineer" even though I know tons of folks who are women, POC, and/or LGBT+ who are killing it in engineering fields.

 

32 minutes ago, starsapart said:

Huh, most of these are part of my aerial warm-up. 😅 Whatever my weaknesses (my pathetic legs, say), I guess I often forget that because of my chosen sport I have a crazy core.

:lol: I'm not surprised!! Somewhere in the post he jokes that getting through level one puts you on par with a four-year-old gymnast, which is probably fair. I've got lots to work on with my core strength, but I did notice that even after just getting back into it the past couple days, my ability to use it during dancing improved noticeably. Sooooo even more reason to make the time for it.

 

32 minutes ago, starsapart said:

Honestly, in my experience, that's the best route. Nothing wrong with finding company for the moment if that's what you're into, but if you're happy doing your own thing, then do that and let life happen. I definitely wasn't looking AT ALL at the time my now-wife and I ended up thrown together by life. I'd say it worked out much better that way.

❤️ that's really comforting to hear - I know I hear it from a lot of happily-married folks, but still comforting! I think I'll be focusing a bit of effort on making more LGBT+ friends in the area, since currently that list really consists of my dance partner (and sorta tangentially some of his friends), my dance coach and his husband, and guys I've dated.

 

32 minutes ago, starsapart said:

This sounds great! Hope it's really fun!!

:D here's hoping! And if I'm not having fun, or decide to change plans last minute and just go home and play video games / read / sew / do whatever OR go out somewhere else and do whatever, there is NOTHING wrong with that. Best part of date night with myself is no one but me needs to agree to the plan, haha.

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On 2/13/2020 at 6:39 PM, Mike Wazowski said:

I try - and occasionally succeed. Can't become a better ally if I can't admit my current shortcomings and all that jazz. It's irksome that my brain immediately pictures a (cis, white, hetero) man when someone says "engineer" even though I know tons of folks who are women, POC, and/or LGBT+ who are killing it in engineering fields.

It's irksome, but also entirely the correct conclusion for your brain to draw considering that the majority of engineers do still in fact fall into the cis, white, hetero category...

 

Have a fun game night! Great game, unless you play against your partner. :P 

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On 2/14/2020 at 2:13 PM, Mad Hatter said:

It's irksome, but also entirely the correct conclusion for your brain to draw considering that the majority of engineers do still in fact fall into the cis, white, hetero category...

I'd agree it's understandable (i.e. grounded in data), but still not an assumption I'd like to persist in my mind. Not sure if there's data to back it up, but I'd like to believe that less people presuming that all engineers (or people in any career, really) are cis, white, hetero men would help, however marginally, increase the diversity of people considering those career tracks (and help lead more companies to make the structural and cultural changes necessary to make those career paths something that people from all sorts of backgrounds can sustain for the long term). Basically, not going to beat myself up too harshly for thinking it, but also not gonna let thoughts like that sit around unchallenged once I notice they've got an obvious disconnect with how I'd like the world to be.

 

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Have a fun game night! Great game, unless you play against your partner. :P 

Hehe I think it's a great game no matter what! I'm generally pretty good at losing graciously, and mostly interested in catching where I could learn to make smarter decisions in the future (either by considering an angle my opponent could take I didn't think of or by making a more optimal play with my own cards).

 

SO WEEKEND UPDATE:

  • Game night was great!!! I met a couple friendly folks (including one who helped me with some basic deck construction and card evaluation stuff) and also opened a pool with a LOT of strong cards in blue and white (including Dream Trawler, which is a Sealed Deck BOMB, for anyone who follows the format) so my deck came together relatively smoothly. I made some pretty good plays on the whole and executed my strategy well, leading to me ending the night 3-1 (I lost to a guy who made better plays than I did in some spots and who also had some really powerful cards of his own at a little faster tempo than I had). I'll definitely be heading back to the game shop again, though I'm not sure exactly when I'll get the chance (I might be able to squeeze in a draft on some Wednesday nights, but that's dependent on me being able to BOLT out of the dance studio after teaching - not impossible, but probably not gonna become a weekly habit either.
  • Spent lots of time training in the dance studio Saturday, Sunday, and Monday. Felt like my partner and I made some solid progress and pushed ourselves as athletes.
  • Got a couple beginner-ish bodyweight workouts in - I picked up the e-book "Get Strong" by the Kavadlo brothers on a whim and I'm working my way through their programming. I found myself wanting to change up programming as I restart doing my own thing post CrossFit, and so far I'm digging bodyweight (especially how minimalist this one is) since I don't have much equipment in my apartment gym. It was nice to push myself and revisit some bodyweight basics with better form than I've had in the past (looking at you, push-ups).
  • I meal prepped and did laundry last night, but felt like a zombie by the end - I think in the future in a similar situation, I'd rather hold off on meal prepping an extra night or two and buy lunches rather than slog through like I did

 

I'm still mulling over goals - I got a curveball when my parents reminded me that Ash Wednesday is this week, i.e. that Lent starts tomorrow - and I think I'll want some of my goals tied into that, since I like using the season as a chance to reflect and reignite my spiritual life a bit.

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Sounds like a great weekend! I also did the thing where I slogged through exhaustion to complete various adulting stuff on Sunday, and I also think in the future I should just... not. Also...

 

5 minutes ago, Mike Wazowski said:

Not sure if there's data to back it up, but I'd like to believe that less people presuming that all engineers (or people in any career, really) are cis, white, hetero men would help, however marginally, increase the diversity of people considering those career tracks (and help lead more companies to make the structural and cultural changes necessary to make those career paths something that people from all sorts of backgrounds can sustain for the long term).

 

I always hope this, too! I have multiple female engineer friends (and several of them also queer, or women of color, or disabled, or all of the above!) and I know they are really passionate about getting some diversity into their fields, and this starts with normalizing the idea that an engineer can look like many different things... to inspire the next generation. 😊

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2 hours ago, starsapart said:

Sounds like a great weekend! I also did the thing where I slogged through exhaustion to complete various adulting stuff on Sunday, and I also think in the future I should just... not.

YES! I think it's something I'll slowly get better at sensing - when will the adulting deplete my ability to "adult" in the future, and how can I hack my way into an easier solution the main problem (in this case - "I need food to eat for the week").

 

2 hours ago, starsapart said:

I always hope this, too! I have multiple female engineer friends (and several of them also queer, or women of color, or disabled, or all of the above!) and I know they are really passionate about getting some diversity into their fields, and this starts with normalizing the idea that an engineer can look like many different things... to inspire the next generation. 😊

:) yes! That's really awesome to hear that there are people out there evangelizing - hopefully I can continue to be a good role model and ally and all that jazz.

 

Alright! Challenge post and goals are finally up - obviously abridged since I finalized them on Tuesday of Week 1 (whoops). Spoilered because it's word vomit:

Spoiler

What's up y'all! Mike Wazowski here, friendly(ish) warrior guild leader who's been on NF for a smidge over three years now (how the time flies). In a nutshell, I'm a data and business strategy nerd for my day job and perpetually think I'm not quite good enough despite ample evidence that I have plenty of the technical skills employers want (including changing jobs for a nice pay increase a year ago and mostly positive reviews, and any development opportunities were *not* related to my technical abilities, but more to the paralysis that can creep in with my self doubt). In the fitness realm of things, first and foremost, I'm a competitive ballroom and latin dancer and coach - I LOVE pushing myself in the studio to be the best version of myself and I LOVE teaching my students just as much! They're a handful at times (though actually sometimes it's coordinating with my co-teachers that's more draining) but I generally walk away from teaching full of life. Outside the dance studio, I initially convinced myself I really needed to train like a hardcore powerlifter or bodybuilder while rigorously tracking macros, and that strategy yielded middling success - I got stronger and a bit leaner, but it definitely did not lead to a healthy relationship to my food or my training and my priorities at times got very out of whack (pushing myself SUPER hard in the gym only to have nothing left in the tank when I got to the studio later the same day). I've varied the intensity over the years, dealt with one wrist injury that started my exit from lifting, said "F*** it" to counting macros a few times only to come back to it, and dabbled with various other sports conditioning and training approaches, including some gymnastics rings and parallettes stuff. While I don't really lift at all anymore (I might dabble in Oly again at some point because it was really fun), I do really enjoy strength training, especially the feeling of pushing myself to exceed my limits just a little bit and push those boundaries just a little bit farther.

 

At least right now, here's where I see my path forward in life stuff (fitness is just a part of life for me):

  • Number one priority is to maintain my physical, mental, and spiritual health so I can keep doing the things I love to do and showing up for the people who matter to me (basic life maintenance like ensuring I have clean clothes to wear falls into this category as well)
  • Number two is to do adequate work and manage my financial health so I can do the other stuff (and ideally, set myself up for working for money to be optional relatively early in my life)
  • Number three is to keep pushing myself to my limits as an athlete and as a teacher - I truly want to keep growing and seeing how much more knowledgeable and able to execute I can become (and how many tools I can have at my disposal to help different students learn and believe in themselves)
  • Number four is to invest in my personal relationships and my various other hobbies that make my life feel rich and full

 

In terms of where health and fitness fits in, I've got a couple things:

  • I need to become a bit leaner for optimal competing in dance (for better or worse, it's a sport-art where your body is judged because it's your art medium) - but I absolutely DO NOT want to and WILL NOT track calories or macros for it; I've tried it in the past and it seemed a surefire path to whacko binge eating, food guilt, and all sorts of other things that don't support my long-term goals. I'll focus instead on making sure that I eat solid meals (protein, veggies, some form of starch and/or bean) at the right times (i.e. eating the meal food first before eating snack food to quickly quell a hunger); I will NOT be weighing myself on the scale and instead will focus on the changes I'm able to see in the mirror with body composition, plus how I'm feeling clothes fit. I'm also planning to give up sweets and processed treats (like chips) for Lent this year, as a way of forcing a temporary hard reset on my relationship with these foods.
  • I am loving the body awareness and coordinated strength I'm getting from my dabbling in bodyweight strength the past week - I want to keep it up as long as I'm still seeing it be beneficial, sprinkling in bonus core work (my core is currently pretty weak, and dancers definitely benefit from a strong core) plus working on mobility - both for injury prevention and to improve the lines I can make with my legs and feet - especially the feet! For right now, the focus will mainly be on injury prevention plus getting back into the habit of strength training. And I'll keep reevaluating what's most important to add as I go along.

 

I had noble intentions to do some in-depth reflection on my challenges and patterns that have emerged. But in a nutshell, I generally try to put too many things onto my challenge plate at once, they're not manageable, and I abandon somewhere between 50-100% of my goals (or have to reset the goal line) by the end of the 4-5 week long challenge.

 

So this time, I'm going to learn ONE THING from my history and ONLY FOCUS ON FOUR THINGS FOR REAL:

  1. Make 7+ hours for sleep every night - wake up a bit later or jettison some tasks from my nighttime routine as needed to make that happen (I *will* wash my face and floss / brush every nigh - this is more like washing dishes and other stuff that I like to do every night but could survive without)
  2. No sweets or processed treats (excluding preplanned greek yogurt parfaits, protein shakes / smoothies, or muffins - I'm not *really* depriving myself, this is just about not going HAM on girl scout cookies or eating a bag of plantain chips in place of dinner)
  3. Pray, meditate, or reflect every day; possible topics include - what unique talents I have, what I'm grateful for, and what I need in my life right now. I feel calmer and more settled when this is a part of my life, but it's easy to let it fall by the wayside.
  4. Work in a focused manner - I'm experimenting with the pomodoro method (25 minutes on, 5 off) as a way to get myself to buckle down and focus; I'll track the number of blocks I do each day and see if I can set a high score for myself.

I'll obviously be training dance in the background and still training and telling y'all how it's going. But the above are the focus goals for the challenge.

 

I've also got some life stuff I'll be reporting on, because to-do lists are fun for my type A brain:

  • Get a haircut before a dance comp this weekend
  • Fix my dance shirt before the comp this weekend (it's a little too small in the butt / crotch and doesn't stay buttoned, time to add a bit more fabric so the crotch snaps are able to stay shut)
  • Pack for competition this weekend (plus guest dance coaching this weekend)
  • Organize a belated birthday shindig for myself (TBD what / where, but do something with my friends)
  • Get an allergy shot (towards the end of the challenge)
  • Renew insurance (in March)
  • Get car serviced (in March)
  • Do taxes (in March)

 

Ok, that's a big ole string of word vomit - hope y'all were able to hang in there to the end

 

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 Ballroom dancer, data nerd, calisthenics dabbler

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7 minutes ago, starsapart said:

Loving the goals! Do we get dance comp photos/videos, pretty please??

Heck yes!!! It should be pretty easy to talk my college kiddos into pointing a camera in our general direction - and I will not be a perfectionist and just post the full set of videos from this go-around.

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Very focused! I’m really hoping it’ll be great so you can get some positive feedback on sticking to ‘just’ 4 goals :) they sound hard enough!

 

also glad you enjoyed game night! You have exactly the right attitude for enjoying magic I think.

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Current challenge: KB Girl dusts off her competition skills

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6 hours ago, Mike Wazowski said:

I absolutely DO NOT want to and WILL NOT track calories or macros for it; I've tried it in the past and it seemed a surefire path to whacko binge eating, food guilt, and all sorts of other things that don't support my long-term goals


Yep. I feel you here.
 

6 hours ago, Mike Wazowski said:

I'll focus instead on making sure that I eat solid meals (protein, veggies, some form of starch and/or bean) at the right times (i.e. eating the meal food first before eating snack food to quickly quell a hunger); I will NOT be weighing myself on the scale and instead will focus on the changes I'm able to see in the mirror with body composition, plus how I'm feeling clothes fit. I'm also planning to give up sweets and processed treats (like chips) for Lent this year, as a way of forcing a temporary hard reset on my relationship with these foods.


I guess using heuristics instead of hard numbers is probably a good way. And I like the idea of giving up something for Lent, because it hopefully will have a different *feeling* to giving up something out of guilt or pure desire to be thinner. Not a deprivation mindset, hopefully. I hope it goes well for you.

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On 2/18/2020 at 5:24 PM, KB Girl said:

Very focused! I’m really hoping it’ll be great so you can get some positive feedback on sticking to ‘just’ 4 goals :) they sound hard enough!

Haha ya - just because I kept it limited doesn't mean I made it easy, it appears!

 

On 2/18/2020 at 5:24 PM, KB Girl said:

also glad you enjoyed game night! You have exactly the right attitude for enjoying magic I think.

:D that's the hope - it definitely took a bit to get there, thank god for slow but steady maturing.

 

On 2/18/2020 at 10:09 PM, Harriet said:

Yep. I feel you here.

Ya, it's a common experience, from polling the nerds on here.

 

On 2/18/2020 at 10:09 PM, Harriet said:

I guess using heuristics instead of hard numbers is probably a good way. And I like the idea of giving up something for Lent, because it hopefully will have a different *feeling* to giving up something out of guilt or pure desire to be thinner. Not a deprivation mindset, hopefully. I hope it goes well for you.

Yup, apparently the heuristics are really what a lot of the research uses to refer to "flexible dieting" when demonstrating that it's superior to rigid approaches to dieting. And yep, something about it being a noble sacrifice instead of deprivation will hopefully help things there. Hopefully.

 

2 hours ago, RedStone said:

I'm just going to leave this here

 

source.gif

1 hour ago, Grumble said:

happy birthday GIF by Universal Music Singapore

THANKS Y'ALL!!!!!!!! It's a long work day, but I've got a big ole group hug coming from my college students tonight, so still gonna be a great birthday! Ooh, and maybe I'll pick up some fresh-baked cookies on my way to the studio!

 

Alright, so update from the past couple days:

  • Tuesday was a long day with work, teaching, then taking a lesson after - but it was SO WORTH IT, uncorked some cool topics in our dancing that have things feeling and flowing much better in samba (will they show up this weekend at the competition? of course not, but they'll be waiting for us when we next work on them!); I didn't think too hard about food stuff, but things mostly clicked
  • I woke up feeling kinda awful on Wednesday - just really tired; and rather than powering through (which I knew I could), I took the day as a sick day, did a lot of binge napping, took a little time to get a haircut and get fancy chicken noodle soup (with which I honestly was nonplussed - but hey, lesson learned trying a new place), and mostly just lazed about doing the absolute bare minimum; I feel much better today, although still not 100% yet!

I didn't actively think about goals, although it goes without saying that I hit my sleep numbers, haha. I also didn't reach for a ton of sweets, which is good. I'll probably have a cookie tonight to celebrate with my kiddos 

 

THE BIG FOUR:

  1. Make 7+ hours for sleep every night: 2/2
  2. No sweets or processed treats: 2/2
  3. Pray, meditate, or reflect every day: 2/2 (sort of quiet reflection, but we'll count it given sicks)
  4. Work in a focused manner: 2 on Tues, obvi 0 Wed

 

Rest of the checklist (1 down, 8 to go):

 

Spoiler
  • Get a haircut before a dance comp this weekend
  • Pack for competition this weekend (plus guest dance coaching this weekend)
  • Organize a belated birthday shindig for myself (tentatively looking at brunch on 02/29, just need to call the restaurant and such)
  • Get an allergy shot (towards the end of the challenge, ca. 3/12)
  • Renew insurance (in March)
  • Get car serviced (in March)
  • Do taxes (in March)
  • Second haircut (ca. 3/18)
  • Fix my dance shirt before the comp this weekend (it's a little too small in the butt / crotch and doesn't stay buttoned, time to add a bit more fabric so the crotch snaps are able to stay shut) (punted this to post comp - I forgot I donated all my stretchy fabric to my dance kiddos - I'll pick up a quarter yard at a local fabric shop sometime and fix it before the 03/21 competition)

 

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 Ballroom dancer, data nerd, calisthenics dabbler

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Happy birthday! :)

On 2/20/2020 at 6:40 PM, Mike Wazowski said:

uncorked some cool topics in our dancing that have things feeling and flowing much better in samba (will they show up this weekend at the competition? of course not, but they'll be waiting for us when we next work on them!)

awesome :)

 

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Main Quest: becoming a decent kettlebell lifter and a great coach

Current challenge: KB Girl dusts off her competition skills

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18 hours ago, KB Girl said:

Are you alright? 

Physically, yes - I came down with what I'm 99% certain was just a common cold early last week, but otherwise just the persistent runny nose of allergies. Emotionally, not really - I'm a ball of anxiety right now, worried about whether or not what I'm doing to keep myself and others safe is enough - perfectionism and anxiety are having a field day right now. But I'm doing what I can - focusing on the problems I can solve, taking things 1 day (or even 1 hour) at a time.

 

But how are you? The Netherlands just shut down to the same level as Italy, right?

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4 minutes ago, Mike Wazowski said:

Physically, yes - I came down with what I'm 99% certain was just a common cold early last week, but otherwise just the persistent runny nose of allergies. Emotionally, not really - I'm a ball of anxiety right now, worried about whether or not what I'm doing to keep myself and others safe is enough - perfectionism and anxiety are having a field day right now. 

 

I had a run-in with those very same demons last week, and probably for the same reasons. I found the information in this thread was very helpful, and the comparatively calm discussion went a long way towards banking The Flame. Definitely recommend reading the posts there if you haven't already.

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“I've always believed that failure is non-existent. What is failure? You go to the end of the season, then you lose the Super Bowl. Is that failing? To most people, maybe. But when you're picking apart why you failed, and now you're learning from that, then is that really failing? I don't think so." - Kobe Bryant, 1978-2020. Rest in peace, great warrior.

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2 hours ago, Mike Wazowski said:

Physically, yes - I came down with what I'm 99% certain was just a common cold early last week, but otherwise just the persistent runny nose of allergies. Emotionally, not really - I'm a ball of anxiety right now, worried about whether or not what I'm doing to keep myself and others safe is enough - perfectionism and anxiety are having a field day right now. But I'm doing what I can - focusing on the problems I can solve, taking things 1 day (or even 1 hour) at a time.

 

But how are you? The Netherlands just shut down to the same level as Italy, right?

BIG DIGITAL, SOCIALLY DISTANCING ACCEPTABLE HUGS TO YOU

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10 hours ago, Mike Wazowski said:

Physically, yes - I came down with what I'm 99% certain was just a common cold early last week, but otherwise just the persistent runny nose of allergies. Emotionally, not really - I'm a ball of anxiety right now, worried about whether or not what I'm doing to keep myself and others safe is enough - perfectionism and anxiety are having a field day right now. But I'm doing what I can - focusing on the problems I can solve, taking things 1 day (or even 1 hour) at a time.

 

But how are you? The Netherlands just shut down to the same level as Italy, right?


I had the same response. Sarahkingdom's comments in the monk infirmary thread helped me to see it as about risk reduction, not perfection. 

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On 3/16/2020 at 4:15 PM, Mike Wazowski said:

Physically, yes - I came down with what I'm 99% certain was just a common cold early last week, but otherwise just the persistent runny nose of allergies. Emotionally, not really - I'm a ball of anxiety right now, worried about whether or not what I'm doing to keep myself and others safe is enough - perfectionism and anxiety are having a field day right now. But I'm doing what I can - focusing on the problems I can solve, taking things 1 day (or even 1 hour) at a time.

 

But how are you? The Netherlands just shut down to the same level as Italy, right?

Big hugs from me too! It's really hard. For what it's worth, I'm sure you're doing waaaay better than your perfectionism would like you to think.

In theory NL is shut down to the same level, but people havent quite grasped the concept yet.. 

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Main Quest: becoming a decent kettlebell lifter and a great coach

Current challenge: KB Girl dusts off her competition skills

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On 3/16/2020 at 10:03 PM, Harriet said:


I had the same response. Sarahkingdom's comments in the monk infirmary thread helped me to see it as about risk reduction, not perfection. 

THIS IS HUGE.

 

It's kind of weird seeing other parts of the country (as well as other countries) not shutting things down yet...

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