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Mistr

Mistr keeps it together

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Mistr keeps it together

 

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I have a lot going on at work and at home this challenge. Unlike previous challenges where I wanted to do All The Things, this time my goal is to keep life on track and stay sane. Progress can wait until the next challenge.

 

The situation:

My team just hired a new person to fill one of two open positions. He starts in two weeks. I'm in charge of the training program. I'm giving all my trainers extra time to update their materials, which means I have to cover more of their work. Then when we start training I will be covering as the trainers are busy teaching our new person. Things will start to ease up right around the end of this challenge.

 

To make things more interesting, my partner Dumbledore is going through an extremely stressful situation at work. Just how long that is going to take to resolve is unclear. Not knowing is part of what is driving him nuts. I am providing lots of emotional support. On the plus side, Dumbledore is doing more of the chores at home to distract himself from work.

 

Goals:

  • Stay on top of things at work. Some days I might not be able to get everything done, that's fine. Make a list and get the spillover done the first thing the next day. Set aside time every Monday morning to look through my pending items.
  • Go to barbells class on Tuesday and Thursday. I started this last challenge and it is going well. Remember that this is a networking goal, not a strength training goal. All I have to do is show up. I can lift heavier or lighter weights as I feel like it. Introduce myself to at least two more people over the challenge.
  • Sit zen every day. Mostly. The goal is to give my mind a break from worrying about everything. If I have to deal with those things and don't have time to sit zen, that is okay. I can work on enlightenment next challenge.
  • Keep doing fun stuff. Aikido and fiber arts both count here. I'm not under pressure to train more. Do fun stuff instead of playing games on my phone when I'm stressed.

 

Tasks:

  • Finish budget analysis
  • Do HSA reimbursements
  • Register for summer SF convention before March 1
  • Get tax info to our accountant
  • Sand and oil my jo

 

Eating healthier would be nice, but that is one area where I'm giving myself extra slack. I have cut out a lot of my usual cooking time to take care of other things. My family has promised to do more cooking this week. If that doesn't happen, I can buy food at work. I'll make sure I have healthier snacks in my desk as well as the normal stash of chocolate.

 

Continue the strict prohibition on caffeine and work on getting to bed on time. I've done a lot better on that recently and it has made a big difference in how I feel at work. More rest helps a lot in dealing with stress.

 

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1 hour ago, Mistr said:

this time my goal is to keep life on track and stay sane. Progress can wait until the next challenge.

Stay sane...I aspire to do that but I fear it's too late...following! 

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I like your barbell goal a lot. You do tons of exercise and could exercise just fine on your own. You have a good thought on getting some extra benefit out of the class.

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Sleep is underrated and underprescribed. I say this as one who could use more. Get as much as you can; it'll really help you.

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Week 1 so far

 

Monday I had to work late. That was good in terms of getting enough sleep but bad for getting anything done after work. I had grand plans to do cooking and other things. What really happened was that I made popcorn and did Duolingo. I got a load of laundry folded and put away to deal with feeling guilty about not sitting zen.

 

More disturbing was that my left knee decided to complain LOUDLY. I still don't know why. It was only a little achey when I did aikido with my weapons partner at lunch. We went really easy because he messed up one of his knees while traveling last week. By the time I got home I was limping. That never happens. I did take my magnesium in the morning too.

 

I got more sleep than I expected, thanks to Tiger balm, a knee sleeve and ibuprofen. My knee felt a little better in the morning. I went to barbell class today thinking that I could skip the squats and lunges if my knee objected too much. I was gentle on the squats and my knee got better with more movement. A little iffy, but not much more than usual. I foam rolled my IT band afterwards. That helped a lot. Bodies. What's a person to do?

 

Spoiler

Dumbledore met with the HR person at work today. He got confirmation that his job is going away. The question now is how much severance they will give. Over the last few weeks he has been like a cat in a room full of rocking chairs. I hope having partial resolution will let him calm down enough to focus on his own projects.

 

My plan for tonight is to do lots of cooking. Dumbledore did the grocery shopping on Sunday. The fridge is full of ingredients that need to be turned into food.

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Glad you could manage the barbell class ok with your knee. Hope it continues to settle down.

The job situation is rough, but yeah, getting rid of uncertainty is helpful. Hope there is enough severance to give him some peace of mind and that some good opportunities emerge.

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Good luck with the staying sane and on track. I hope the knee turns out not to be serious. Bodies. IDK. But I know that despite the extra little injuries, doing sport has kept me in better repair than not doing it. 

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Glad you're able to get some movement out of the knee for now. Hopefully it's just some kind of passing soreness, but if you have access to medical care, don't be afraid to use it.

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Thanks everyone for the good wishes. My knee was perfectly fine last night. I took preventative ibuprofen because of working out. No noticeable DOMS.

 

I did cook a southwestern style chicken dish with onions, peppers, garlic, tomatoes and black beans. I procrastinated and played games on my phone for an hour before I got myself moving.

 

I also provided emotional support

Spoiler

Elf is having a bad time with anxiety. They are having nightmares that their biological family is going to kidnap them, haul them back and make them be male and Christian* again. They feel like their current life is too good to be true.

* Their biological family belongs to a break-off ultra-conservative Christian group. Elf recently told their coworkers that they grew up in a cult. This is true.

 

I told them that I am proud of them for taking positive steps to deal with their health concerns and brain weasels. I also told them that they get at least seven years under Fairy Hill before their mortal relatives can call them back. Hopefully the rest of their life, but two more years is a good start. That seemed to help.

 

Really, if their biological family tries anything we are fighting back with cops and lawyers. And swords if necessary. Elf is OUR KID and we are not giving them back.

 

Dumbledore seemed pretty good when I got home from work. Later in the evening he was ruminating about all the problems at work again. A lot of "could I have seen this coming?". I reassured him that he did the right things and asked good questions last year. He tends to assume the best of people and did not expect someone who seemed friendly to be actively destructive. Now he is feeling paranoid that other bad things may happen out of left field. I can't promise that bad things won't happen. I just hope that getting out of the current bad situation will make it less likely.

 

Both of them asked me how I was holding up. I said I was fine. That is only partly true. Today I'm running on six hours sleep and can tell that my attitude is suffering. I'm going to sit zen between work and aikido. My plan for class is kind of sketchy. If I'm lucky, no one will want to stay for intermediate class and I will be able to get to bed early. Nothing else needs to get done today.

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Oh, poor elf. That sounds really rough. But they're lucky you are such a mighty and caring guardian and were able to put some of their fears to rest.  

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Things are going a bit better. More sleep makes a big difference. I am especially grateful to my past self for scheduling next Monday off.

 

One thing that is going to make everyone happier is that Amber got spayed (for a second time) yesterday. The shelter gave us records showing she was spayed when we adopted her, but she was still going into heat. The working theory was that the vet missed part of an ovary. Finding a bit of tissue in a small cat seemed like a difficult thing, so we just put up with her yowling a couple weeks per month.

 

Our vet clinic now has a surgeon who does laparoscopic spays. Much safer for the animal and a better chance of success. Turns out the original vet really botched the job. Amber had an entire ovary and half her uterus. WTF?!? I know shelter vets are under a lot of pressure to be quick, but that is ridiculous. She was no longer yowling when she came home. Hopefully that will continue after the pain killers wear off. She has been losing weight over the last year, to the point that she was very skinny. Now she should be able to relax and be a more contented cat.

 

Other good new is that Elf is being trained to do more things at work. They think their manager is grooming them to become an assistant manager. They are getting more hours and taking care of their financial commitments. Dumbledore and I told them how proud we are of them.

 

Dumbledore is still twitchy but he is moving forward with his life. Last night he helped me get a new-to-me phone set up when my regular phone went wonky. He also did a sink of dishes and promised to take the trash bins to the curb. :P 

 

Barbell training went okay. I'm going to stick with medium weight for a few more weeks and see if I can improve my form for squats. I should be able to get full depth with a 10 pound weight on my shoulders. I know I can get full depth with goblet squats. I think it is just my brain protecting my joints when moving fast. Pushups and core exercises are getting easier. And I introduced myself to someone yesterday. Progress.

 

Overall I feel like I'm keeping it together, just barely. Your support makes a big difference for me.

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No longer able to resist the temptation to post here... You're going to make it through this and come out on the other side, eventually. And if you end up needing to defend your family with swords, and need some spare blades, just say the word. :) 

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On 2/19/2020 at 6:04 PM, Mistr said:

Really, if their biological family tries anything we are fighting back with cops and lawyers. And swords if necessary. Elf is OUR KID and we are not giving them back

I cheered when I read this...seriously! I'm useless with swords but can swing a baseball bat like you wouldn't believe ;) 

 

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4 hours ago, Mistr said:

Overall I feel like I'm keeping it together, just barely. Your support makes a big difference for me.

 

My cure for this is always a Pratchett book. Audiobook, if you don't have time to read.

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You are dealing with a lot, but I'm happy to see all the good things. A properly spayed cat for one, should improve quality of life for all of you. Also so nice to hear that Elf is well-regarded at work and has some possibilities for advancement. Every day under Fairy Hill will help them get a little stronger.

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Wow.  A lot of things have happened.  

I know everyone has said it, but here's one more voice for the amazing parenting chorus.  The safe, stable home you are providing Elf is awesome and really inspiring.  Imma cry if you post more.  I am glad to hear that there are new positive things for them at work; it is always good to feel entrenched in multiple aspects of life.  May make them feel like Fairy Hill is much more stable, and there are lots more people with swords to do some bashing if Bad Company comes to call.

 

I am so sorry to hear about Dumbledore's situation, but I am really glad that he is at least starting to adjust.  I don't even know how to approach that, but you've been doing Seven Labors of Herculean emotional supporting and that is heartwarming.  I am glad you have been able to make it through too.

 

ALSO WHAT SURGEON DOESN'T FINISH THE JOB HONESTLY.   YOU ALL ARE SUPPOSED TO BE A BUNCH OF BOVI HAPPY-- I mean

Achem

*Coughs* Uh, wow I am so glad that your cat got more care and is now no longer yowling and can live a happy and productive life thanks to advancements in veterinary technology.  That's swell.

 

And you are still killing it in barbell class.  You are making it through in spades.  That is so great to hear.  

 

You don't need me to say it, but you are absolutely getting through this and will continue to get through this.  Gracefully, and hopefully with lots of sleep.

Also we will all come with swords if Elf has a problem, don't think I won't take sick days for that.  Guildstrong backup.  

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If we're going to talk about this Fairy Hill a lot, would someone mind filling me in on what it is? I somehow doubt that Google is correct in telling me it means Elf really is an elf changeling, abandoned at @Mistr ' front porch by supernatural creatures, as compensation for stealing the household's biological child. ;)

 

(Though if Elf is secretly of the fey folk, that would be pretty cool.)

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3 hours ago, Scalyfreak said:

If we're going to talk about this Fairy Hill a lot, would someone mind filling me in on what it is? I somehow doubt that Google is correct in telling me it means Elf really is an elf changeling, abandoned at @Mistr ' front porch by supernatural creatures, as compensation for stealing the household's biological child. ;)

 

(Though if Elf is secretly of the fey folk, that would be pretty cool.)

 

No, not quite. You have it backwards. Elf came from mortal lands (a very conservative small town/rural community) to live with the fey folk. Not stolen in this case, because Elf was cast out by their family and community. Changeling is actually a good description of Elf's situation. We are the fey folk in this story. Maybe not supernatural, but quite weird in the view of Elf's mundane upbringing.

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