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KB Girl

KB Girl looks on the bright side

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4 hours ago, KB Girl said:

Sleep deprivation makes everything hard..

 

YES. YES IT DOES. That's why any new parent who's still managing to do anything other than take care of baby and cry on the kitchen floor is a hero in my book.

 

4 hours ago, KB Girl said:

though I realise you’re playing on an extra hard setting too- I am lucky that Emma has this hyper focus thing.. she’ll easily listen to a story for an hour straight. I would like her to do other things aswell, so I don’t let her listen to it 24 hours a day. But she totally would. She didn’t get that from a stranger ;)

 

I hope starlet grows into this kind of attention span! I think it's pretty common at her age not to be that attentive.

 

4 hours ago, KB Girl said:

but I don’t know, I hardly move when feeding the baby, I think it would really overestimate how much I’m really sleeping. 

 

Belatedly - my fitbit tracks asleep vs. awake (and even deep vs. light sleep) if I wear it to bed. It's heart rate based, so it was able to tell I was awake even if I just barely moved to soothe my newborn in the bassinet beside my bed.. If you really want a measure of that, anyway...

 

4 hours ago, KB Girl said:

Jaap did not have a good day, he was hit by another round of anxiety and a general feeling of uselessness.

 

I relate to this. Virtual hugs for Jaap. Virtual hugs for you, too.

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5 hours ago, KB Girl said:

I have this 2kg bell that emma was using to mimic me with my 10kg bell (offset leg deadlifts, chair squats, OH presses, rows, Romanian deadlifts, cleans, more rows). And then she started making up movements with gibberish names. 

 

Awesome. She's going to be so mighty. 

 

5 hours ago, KB Girl said:

Jaap did not have a good day, he was hit by another round of anxiety and a general feeling of uselessness. He’s a hard worker and doesn’t do so well without seeing what work he ought to be doing. And I later realised he really needs some structure in his day. So today I’m going to come up with a bit of routine for his days and a list of things to do. 


It's great that you know what he needs and have a plan to help him. I hope he feels better soon.

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1 hour ago, Scalyfreak said:

 

I understand and sympathize with Jaap's situation. From personal observation, a hug seems to be an effective way to temporarily stave off the anxiety for a little bit. I hope having routines helps him!

It was your write up that made me realise what was a big part of the trouble he was having. I think he uttered a sigh of relief when I proposed regular work hours for him... it's just been a bit weird for us you know? Work from home.. what work? and what times? and we had this baby born at the start of quarantaine.. 

Hugs always work for me! Never so sure with Jaap.. But won't stop me from trying :D

 

1 hour ago, starsapart said:

YES. YES IT DOES. That's why any new parent who's still managing to do anything other than take care of baby and cry on the kitchen floor is a hero in my book.

I will keep this in mind whenever I feel like a loser :D

 

1 hour ago, starsapart said:

I hope starlet grows into this kind of attention span! I think it's pretty common at her age not to be that attentive.

Oh she probably will! I highly doubt Emma was that attentive when she was Starlets age.. hard to remember these things.. I only started writing stuff down when she was just 2 years old and I want to kick myself for not doing it sooner. Baby things are rather boring, but as soon as they start to talk or really learn things it's very very nice to look back on. 

 

1 hour ago, starsapart said:

Belatedly - my fitbit tracks asleep vs. awake (and even deep vs. light sleep) if I wear it to bed. It's heart rate based, so it was able to tell I was awake even if I just barely moved to soothe my newborn in the bassinet beside my bed.. If you really want a measure of that, anyway...

oh yea heart rate based would probably work.. 

 

2 hours ago, starsapart said:

I relate to this. Virtual hugs for Jaap. Virtual hugs for you, too.

❤️

 

46 minutes ago, Harriet said:

Awesome. She's going to be so mighty. 
It's great that you know what he needs and have a plan to help him. I hope he feels better soon.

We just don't know wether she'll follow in my footsteps and prefer lifting weights, or if she'll follow in Jaap's footsteps and prefer bodyweight stuff. Warrior or assassin?! 

It was actually @Scalyfreak who made me realise what was going on... I do also have general anxiety over this whole thing.. but I don't really need structure, especially not now- the hormones are taking all that away, which is necessary, because there is no structure when you are at the beck and call of a newborn. 

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21 minutes ago, KB Girl said:

It was your write up that made me realise what was a big part of the trouble he was having. I think he uttered a sigh of relief when I proposed regular work hours for him... it's just been a bit weird for us you know? Work from home.. what work? and what times? and we had this baby born at the start of quarantaine.. 

 

Adjusting to a new baby is in itself a huge deal. It would not be the least bit strange if that distracted you from all the quarantine adjustments the rest of us are doing, causing them to creep up on you and take you by surprise.

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Thursday (day 20) was a day to just get through. Jaap hadn’t slept much (he gets insomnia from stress) so I took both kids out for 2 hours to give him some nap time. 
 

Later he went for a grocery run and got us some barbecue things, we made simple kebabs and grilled a lot of veggies. 
 

Sophie has just wanted to nurse all day.. 


i know from experience that eventually this is a nice and peaceful and cozy thing.. but right now it’s first 15 minutes of struggle with Sophie choking on the rush of milk, me struggling to not get us soaking wet, re-latching about a 100 times, which hurts just a little bit but enough to ugh. And then maybe 2 minutes of peaceful drinking before another round of struggle starts this time with an angry baby that gets annoyed by how slowly the milk now comes.. SIGH. 
And then you have this peacefully sleeping satiated baby.... for maybe 5 minutes because then the hiccups or burping starts from all the extra air she gulped during the first phase. Grr.


 

i weighed myself. 85,9kg.

Will have to lose 11kg to get back to competition weight.. A potential silver lining.. because the world championship was cancelled and tentatively rescheduled for December, I may actually be able to compete. (There are two divisions for adults, pro and amateur, I’m with the amateurs.. getting close to qualify for pro, but that’ll take a while longer to get back to if I can do it at all)

and even if I can’t compete at least I could be there for my athletes.

 

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4 minutes ago, KB Girl said:

Sophie has just wanted to nurse all day.. 

 

  Reveal hidden contents


i know from experience that eventually this is a nice and peaceful and cozy thing.. but right now it’s first 15 minutes of struggle with Sophie choking on the rush of milk, me struggling to not get us soaking wet, re-latching about a 100 times, which hurts just a little bit but enough to ugh. And then maybe 2 minutes of peaceful drinking before another round of struggle starts this time with an angry baby that gets annoyed by how slowly the milk now comes.. SIGH. 
And then you have this peacefully sleeping satiated baby.... for maybe 5 minutes because then the hiccups or burping starts from all the extra air she gulped during the first phase. Grr.
 

 

 

This sounds so frustrating! I'm glad you already know when and how this is likely to improve.

 

4 minutes ago, KB Girl said:

A potential silver lining.. because the world championship was cancelled and tentatively rescheduled for December, I may actually be able to compete. (There are two divisions for adults, pro and amateur, I’m with the amateurs.. getting close to qualify for pro, but that’ll take a while longer to get back to if I can do it at all)

and even if I can’t compete at least I could be there for my athletes.

 

I hope you get to go, whether to compete or just support!

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I hope Jaap feels better with imposed routines. It must be SO difficult and stressful when one is stressed out and anxious and the other a hormonal mess (uh sorry for the phrasing haha) and there's finances and a newborn in the picture. You really are doing quite incredibly well. Hugs to both of you.

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20 hours ago, KB Girl said:

A potential silver lining.. because the world championship was cancelled and tentatively rescheduled for December, I may actually be able to compete. (There are two divisions for adults, pro and amateur, I’m with the amateurs.. getting close to qualify for pro, but that’ll take a while longer to get back to if I can do it at all)

and even if I can’t compete at least I could be there for my athletes.

 

Oooh, exciting! 

Sorry to hear about the frustrating breastfeeding. It sounds like it's actually a real skill! I never though of it like that but I guess babies have to learn. I'm sure she'll get the hang of it soon. It will come together. Hang in there. 

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6 hours ago, zenLara said:

Sorry about the breastfeeding issues. I hope it gets easier soon.

How's Jaap going?

Apparently complaining helps because today was much better :)

Jaap got a lot of sleep, which always helps!

 

6 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

I hope Jaap feels better with imposed routines. It must be SO difficult and stressful when one is stressed out and anxious and the other a hormonal mess (uh sorry for the phrasing haha) and there's finances and a newborn in the picture. You really are doing quite incredibly well. Hugs to both of you.

Quite accurate phrasing :D

Thank you! I hadn’t thought of it in that light. 
 

2 hours ago, Harriet said:

 

Oooh, exciting! 

Sorry to hear about the frustrating breastfeeding. It sounds like it's actually a real skill! I never though of it like that but I guess babies have to learn. I'm sure she'll get the hang of it soon. It will come together. Hang in there. 

yea you’d think Mother Nature could’ve made that a little easier.. it’s not just the baby that needs to learn, it’s me also.. 
 

2 hours ago, Sloth the Enduring said:

Wow. Professional Kettlebeller! emoji7.png

well maybe hopefully someday ;)

I already coach pro kettlebellers, which is the far more important bit to me!
 

56 minutes ago, Elastigirl said:

Hugs, sorry. Hopefully the breastfeeding issues get better soon. That would be super awesome if you could compete!

It would be :) I wonder what will be the biggest challenge, getting used to the bells again or getting into my comp weight (-11kg is a lot!)

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Friday, day 21

 

Three weeks! So much and yet so little happened in three weeks... 

 

We had a pretty good day. Jaap had slept well (just having a bit of a plan was enough to fix the insomnia) and he finished up a project in our hallway... basically making it spacier and prettier :)

I fixed some things like getting Sophie added to our insurance and adjusting some training plans for people.
 

Later in the day we went into the woods with our girls. It was very nice. My left hip started complaining near the end, since we walked for almost an hour and a half that’s very good too.

tmi recovery talk/comparison;



I finally stopped bleeding for real this time. I feel like I’m several months ahead of my recovery when compared to Emma’s birth, which is great but also tricky because I have to remember that on the inside it’s probably not all good to go yet. 
 

After Emma I couldn’t have even dreamed about walking for an hour and a half.. and definitely not without taking toilet breaks. That hip thing that bothers me now... I think emma was at least 4-5 months old before it was at this stage. 
even better- I can hold my pee- I don’t have to go to the toilet every half hour, and I already coughed and sneezed without losing anything.. I think Emma was 9 months before I could safely sneeze. 
Such an amazing difference. 
Sometimes it’s great to be a stubborn nerd.

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5 hours ago, zenLara said:

Sounds like amazing fast recovery. I'm happy for you!

Thank you :)

 

2 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

That's amazing recovery! What do you think made the biggest difference this time around? 

It’s hard to say because I did so many things.. my training was definitely different, I adjusted sooner and more- which is what I think really helped my abs this time (I forgot to mention the diastasis is already 99% gone, that took a whole year after Emma..) which in turn must really help the hip. I also did a lot of extra specific hip work.. 

but if I had to pick one thing, it’s gotta be the very conscious relaxing of the whole pelvic girdle all the time. I’m sure I must have talked about that? Over use of those pelvic girdle muscles were what I think caused me so much pain in the early stages of this pregnancy and throughout my first one. 

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6 minutes ago, KB Girl said:

It’s hard to say because I did so many things.. my training was definitely different, I adjusted sooner and more- which is what I think really helped my abs this time (I forgot to mention the diastasis is already 99% gone, that took a whole year after Emma..) which in turn must really help the hip. I also did a lot of extra specific hip work.. 

but if I had to pick one thing, it’s gotta be the very conscious relaxing of the whole pelvic girdle all the time. I’m sure I must have talked about that? Over use of those pelvic girdle muscles were what I think caused me so much pain in the early stages of this pregnancy and throughout my first one. 

 

Interesting. I didn't know you could heal diastasis that fast. in fact, one of the reasons I'm leaning away from having children is all the things the internet says can happen to one's body that are permanent and bad. They all suggest it's random what happens to whom, and you can't prevent any of it. It's very discouraging. I wonder if they only study typical sedentary women, though. Maybe the internet just doesn't understand deadlifting pregnant ladies. Anyway, I'm glad you're recovering faster and I hope everything goes smoothly.

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1 hour ago, Harriet said:

 

Interesting. I didn't know you could heal diastasis that fast. in fact, one of the reasons I'm leaning away from having children is all the things the internet says can happen to one's body that are permanent and bad. They all suggest it's random what happens to whom, and you can't prevent any of it. It's very discouraging. I wonder if they only study typical sedentary women, though. Maybe the internet just doesn't understand deadlifting pregnant ladies. Anyway, I'm glad you're recovering faster and I hope everything goes smoothly.

That’s actually one of the things that really got me down during/after my first pregnancy, in which I deadlifted just as much. I figured being reasonably strong and fit that I wouldn’t have too many problems.. but that didn’t turn out to be true at all. 
As soon as I got pointed in the right direction my diastasis actually healed up very fast, the pee holding thing was more difficult.. but I think that if I hadn’t figured out myself what to do that I would have simply learned to live with it and figured that the damage was permanent- as so many women do. PT didn’t help me much if at all.. 

I didn’t need to be that miserable during and after my first pregnancy, and its infuriating to know that many other women suffer needlessly too... that’s what made me interested in studying up more on this subject, because I can now help women whose eldest child is already in school, and it’s beautiful work. 

Having said all that, not everything is in your control. C-sections and giant tears and other bad luck do happen despite all your best efforts. Some damage can be bad and permanent.. growing humans is a tricky thing :) we’re not likely to die from it anymore, but it’s certainly not a risk free thing.

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37 minutes ago, KB Girl said:

As soon as I got pointed in the right direction my diastasis actually healed up very fast, the pee holding thing was more difficult.. but I think that if I hadn’t figured out myself what to do that I would have simply learned to live with it and figured that the damage was permanent- as so many women do. PT didn’t help me much if at all.. 

 

How did you find out what to do? Did you research/experiment yourself, or was there a more reliable source of information?

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14 hours ago, Harriet said:

 

How did you find out what to do? Did you research/experiment yourself, or was there a more reliable source of information?

There is good information out there, like the book from Katy Bowman on diastasis that @Mad Hatter reminded me of. The difficulty is mostly in finding these gems inbetween the not so useful or even mis information. And it definitely helps if you have a lot of background information so you can mix and match. Jaap specialises in chronic joint pain, that really helped put together some puzzle pieces. 

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Day 22 aka Saturday,

 

It was a bit of a struggle to get through.. but positives; we made bread for the first time which was fun.. and we used half the dough to make pizza, which was tasty.

my brother+gf came to bring us some vegan chocolate and they stayed to chat through the window for almost an hour, which was also nice.

 

Hope everyone has a nice Easter. With magic mental uplifting prowess. 

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On 4/9/2020 at 10:10 PM, KB Girl said:

Will have to lose 11kg to get back to competition weight.. A potential silver lining.. because the world championship was cancelled and tentatively rescheduled for December, I may actually be able to compete. (There are two divisions for adults, pro and amateur, I’m with the amateurs.. getting close to qualify for pro, but that’ll take a while longer to get back to if I can do it at all)

 

Exciting! I hope the world will be in  better place by then.

 

14 hours ago, KB Girl said:

I didn’t need to be that miserable during and after my first pregnancy, and its infuriating to know that many other women suffer needlessly too... that’s what made me interested in studying up more on this subject, because I can now help women whose eldest child is already in school, and it’s beautiful work. 

 

This makes me so sad :(  and angry as well indeed that this type of info is not mainstream yet. I'm glad it is starting to get out with books and specialized coaches like you.

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15 hours ago, KB Girl said:

I didn’t need to be that miserable during and after my first pregnancy, and its infuriating to know that many other women suffer needlessly too... that’s what made me interested in studying up more on this subject, because I can now help women whose eldest child is already in school, and it’s beautiful work. 

Let's be real, if men peed every time they sneezed we'd have all the answers a long time ago. It's a disgrace how anything related to women's health doesn't count. Oh so you nearly pass out every time you're on your period - here take a painkiller and stop making a fuss. It's called being a woman. Or just do some kegels. 😡

 

I'm so glad there are people like you in the world that have the knowledge and experience and willingness to help! This is very much writing worthy stuff hint hint nudge nudge. 😉

 

Yay for baking!

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36 minutes ago, Mad Hatter said:

Oh so you nearly pass out every time you're on your period - here take a painkiller and stop making a fuss.

 

:angry: yeah. One of my friends got that answer for years, it turned out she had a cyst and it was cancerous. She had to end up in an emergency room for doctors to really look into her pain. And by that time, the cyst had grown a lot....

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