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Flea Gonna Do Stuff


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I made a “wishlist” of things I wanted to do during May and June, apocalypse notwithstanding. Broadly, all the things happen fit into 4 categories. So since mental health is a fickle bitch, the challe

My life is a joooooooke.    I've been looking at all the headphones suggested. Thanks y'all.    Ms. Fix-It wins again and with the help of google I figured out the knob on the drye

I swear I’m not dead. Just exhausted. The dryer is broken again (new issue this time), my brother lost his glasses (found now) and it was a massive ordeal, and my father is tilting at windmills at thi

5 minutes ago, Red1263 said:

I take it sitting down and talking to him is out of the question?

 

I'm new to the scene so is there some kind of mental issue going on?

My father? Yeahhh no. He’s a grade-A jackass with zero empathy or social skills. Talking to him only works when it’s something he wants to hear. 
 

He doesn’t have any diagnosed issues (because he refuses to see anyone about it) but my entirely non-professional opinion is that he has depression, anxiety, ADHD, shitty coping mechanisms and self esteem issues if not PTSD stemming from an unpleasant childhood, and also his head is so far up his own ass there’s probably some brain damage from oxygen deprivation. Also possible (actual) brain issues from a car accident. Also also he’s largely stuck in the 1950s when it comes to gender roles, race issues, and anything that upsets his straight white male ego. 
 

I appreciate the suggestion of talking to him and I wish it would work. But unfortunately it doesn’t, so my only way of dealing with him for now is to rant here about all his bullshit. Along with therapy. And Zoloft. 

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Whoa! I'm so sorry that you're going through this. Man, you actually remind me of my best friend who was raised by her grandparents who has a similar 1950's mentality, the kicker? She's a very tomboyish lesbian, and they simply cannot wrap their heads around it. Because I'm a guy, they keep asking us when is she and I going to get married. It's not been easy for her to be raised that way. 

 

I'm sorry that there's nothing I can do for you except listen. I hope that helps.

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1 hour ago, Red1263 said:

Whoa! I'm so sorry that you're going through this. Man, you actually remind me of my best friend who was raised by her grandparents who has a similar 1950's mentality, the kicker? She's a very tomboyish lesbian, and they simply cannot wrap their heads around it. Because I'm a guy, they keep asking us when is she and I going to get married. It's not been easy for her to be raised that way. 

 

I'm sorry that there's nothing I can do for you except listen. I hope that helps.

Thanks. Listening does help, tbh. Since no one here has met my family, I can be honest about what happens and I don't have to worry that no one will believe me or will think I'm exaggerating or anything. 

 

edit: I mean, you can still think I'm exaggerating. but there's no "really? because your parents don't seem all that bad."

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Changing tracks a bit: does anyone know if there's a huge list or database type thing anywhere on the interwebs that lists like, all the foods that help lower A1c and all the foods that lower cholesterol and all the foods that lower other numbers? And/or a list of what vitamins/minerals/supplements should be taken together for best absorption or not taken together because they fuck each other up? I'm sure I can find all of those things separately, and for the "foods that lower X" it's mostly overlap (eat whole grains and green things, surprise!), but I'm thinking it might help me get my shit together if I can feel like I'm hacking or gaming the system by focusing on meals/foods that would give me the most bang for my buck in terms of things they can affect. Maybe I can satisfy some gremlins in terms of what I "should" be eating. 

 

Actually I know for sure I can find lists for cholesterol and A1c and whatnot, because there are a million articles about it. But my google-fu is horrible and I can't figure out how to search for a giant list of everything.

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Uggggh I found a temporary federal position that I might be able to parlay into getting credit for the stupid job I need to get. But federal hiring requirements are such bullshit I'm not sure I'll be able to swing it. I got a phone interview for a different position in the past and they wanted contact info for two former supervisors and iirc one of their supervisors? So I declined it because I don't even have that information. (And also I didn't really want the job so whoops.) But that was at State and this is just a temp customer service job at the SBA dealing with COVID-related shit, so maybe the requirements won't be so bonkers? Please??

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16 minutes ago, fleaball said:

But that was at State and this is just a temp customer service job at the SBA dealing with COVID-related shit, so maybe the requirements won't be so bonkers? Please??

 

Crossing my fingers. 

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6 hours ago, fleaball said:

But of course this fucking moron can figure out porn sites. But not clearing his history, because the gods hate me. 

I wanted to do a reaction to this but there doesn't seem to be a barf option

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How badly would it affect you if your dad's PC got a particularly nasty infection from the porn sites he's visiting, ON THE SAME PC/internet connection that he's using for his banking etc.?

 

I bet he's the type to click on the ads and open phishing emails etc.? Probably badly. I won't wish for it. Ugh.

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2 hours ago, fleaball said:

Thanks. Listening does help, tbh. Since no one here has met my family, I can be honest about what happens and I don't have to worry that no one will believe me or will think I'm exaggerating or anything. 

 

edit: I mean, you can still think I'm exaggerating. but there's no "really? because your parents don't seem all that bad."

Then I'll be here to listen whenever you need it!

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2 hours ago, fleaball said:

A1c and all the foods that lower cholesterol and all the foods that lower other numbers?

 

2 hours ago, fleaball said:

But my google-fu is horrible

 

Principle #1 of Google fu: Think but do not think. Type without typing. Expectation leads to suffering.

Principle #2 of Google fu: Algorithms crash, and they can flow. You put words into the algorithm, and the algorithm becomes the words.

You add clicks on mildly related hits to the algorithm, and Google learns.

Be patient, my friend. When you are ready, the relevant results will Appear. 

 

So, what I'm basically trying to make more interesting than it is:

 

What I've learnt is that you shouldn't take "no" for an answer with Google. Keep feeding it key words, patting it on its head when it gets a result a little bit closer to what you need, and it will work better and better. If it's super niche, and you're super stubborn, it might take days. What you're looking for is probably widely searched for, Google just doesn't know what you want yet. 

 

I'll start feeding my side of Google and see if it turns up here. Some of the search terms I am planning to use is something like "holistic approach to blood levels" or something like that. More and more people are combining (Western) science with the holistic approach in good overviews, so that might help. :) 

 

People on the other side of the globe might have even more scientific research on it, but I don't know. 

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My favorite website about blood sugar is https://https://www.bloodsugar101.com/


how-to-lower-your-blood-sugar

 lots of info about how blood sugar works. Her main thing is that everyone is different and the best thing is to test, test, test your own blood sugar. That is what I have been doing. When I was on the nutritionists special diabetes diet, my a1c went up. I can keep it down with the test, test, test approach. 

I learned that I can handle bread and potatoes and sometimes cookies but I need to stay far away from rice, milk and oatmeal. Which is weird because they always recommend oatmeal and milk in the diabetes diet, but those raise my blood sugars really high. My personal goal is to keep my blood sugar below 140 at all times. If I stick with it, I can get my a1c down to 5.7 %.

Got nothing on cholesterol, sorry, except that my doctor prescribed fish oil capsules.

Good luck on the job.

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3 hours ago, analoggirl said:

How badly would it affect you if your dad's PC got a particularly nasty infection from the porn sites he's visiting, ON THE SAME PC/internet connection that he's using for his banking etc.?

 

I bet he's the type to click on the ads and open phishing emails etc.? Probably badly. I won't wish for it. Ugh.

yeah that would be highly inconvenient. I’ve installed a free anti-virus program on his computer and I should probably do more but I really don’t want to have a conversation with my father about his porn habits. D: Also an adblocker because even the not-porn sites he visits are hot garbage and I don’t want to deal with their shitty ads. 

 

Thankfully he’s pretty good about not clicking on shit. He’s aware of a number of common scams as a result of being a cop, and beyond that idk, I guess I got lucky? If he gets an email, text message, or phone call that he doesn’t recognize or understand he’ll actually bring it to me to make sure it’s legit. 
 

2 hours ago, Red1263 said:

Then I'll be here to listen whenever you need it!

❤️
 

2 hours ago, analoggirl said:

 

Principle #1 of Google fu: Think but do not think. Type without typing. Expectation leads to suffering.

Principle #2 of Google fu: Algorithms crash, and they can flow. You put words into the algorithm, and the algorithm becomes the words.

You add clicks on mildly related hits to the algorithm, and Google learns.

Be patient, my friend. When you are ready, the relevant results will Appear. 

 

So, what I'm basically trying to make more interesting than it is:

 

What I've learnt is that you shouldn't take "no" for an answer with Google. Keep feeding it key words, patting it on its head when it gets a result a little bit closer to what you need, and it will work better and better. If it's super niche, and you're super stubborn, it might take days. What you're looking for is probably widely searched for, Google just doesn't know what you want yet. 

 

I'll start feeding my side of Google and see if it turns up here. Some of the search terms I am planning to use is something like "holistic approach to blood levels" or something like that. More and more people are combining (Western) science with the holistic approach in good overviews, so that might help. :) 

 

People on the other side of the globe might have even more scientific research on it, but I don't know. 

Cheers. My problem with Google fu, and really any kind of research, is that I get super stuck on one phrase or set of keywords and a mental block kicks in where I can’t even think of any alternatives. Like there are so many times I’d be talking about having trouble with a paper in school and someone would be like “did you try [phrase]” that was the most obvious thing in the world but it still never occurred to me. Stupid brain. 
 

1 hour ago, Emma said:

My favorite website about blood sugar is https://https://www.bloodsugar101.com/


how-to-lower-your-blood-sugar

 lots of info about how blood sugar works. Her main thing is that everyone is different and the best thing is to test, test, test your own blood sugar. That is what I have been doing. When I was on the nutritionists special diabetes diet, my a1c went up. I can keep it down with the test, test, test approach. 

I learned that I can handle bread and potatoes and sometimes cookies but I need to stay far away from rice, milk and oatmeal. Which is weird because they always recommend oatmeal and milk in the diabetes diet, but those raise my blood sugars really high. My personal goal is to keep my blood sugar below 140 at all times. If I stick with it, I can get my a1c down to 5.7 %.

Got nothing on cholesterol, sorry, except that my doctor prescribed fish oil capsules.

Good luck on the job.

Thanks for the resources! I’ll check with my new PCP next week about whether I should be testing my sugar or not. My levels were low enough in January that my current/outgoing doctor was fine with just the lifestyle changes and checking in like 6 months. And I think I was doing okay for a bit, and then the world exploded so now I’m back to eating shitty food to soothe the gremlins. Hence the current idea of trying to make my food multitask and fix everything at once. 

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1 hour ago, fleaball said:

Stupid brain. 

 

Nahhh your brain isn't stupid. It's probably always juggling more things than most people's at most times.

 

Dunno if that helps or makes you want to throw the monitor at someone's head. But it's my defiant statement with my chin raised against your gremlins. I might think of something better next time :D

 

 

6 hours ago, fleaball said:

really? because your parents don't seem all that bad."

 

This makes me want to roll my eyes so far back into my head btw.

 

Because I doubt you've said it to someone you didn't feel like you could be open to.

 

Though it's probably a good thing that they don't know how much different a seemingly good-natured person can be behind closed doors/to his family. Even to the pt of being helpful to others and keeping his promises etc.

 

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4 hours ago, fleaball said:

Cheers. My problem with Google fu, and really any kind of research, is that I get super stuck on one phrase or set of keywords and a mental block kicks in where I can’t even think of any alternatives. Like there are so many times I’d be talking about having trouble with a paper in school and someone would be like “did you try [phrase]” that was the most obvious thing in the world but it still never occurred to me. Stupid brain. 

 

 

So I firmly believe that some days the Google Fu is just not there. Yes, many times it is about finding the right keywords for what you want, but sometimes, it is as if the world's Google Fu is out of alignment and you can't find a bloody thing on it. I google way more than I should at work for code snippets sometimes and somedays it just doesn't work. Think of it like Chakras or something, where some days, its just an off day and it takes a bit to get back in line.

Oh, and brain isn't stupid. Brain just has too much going on. And besides, the above statement still stands.

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You don’t need a prescription to buy a meter and test strips. I started doing it just to get a better day by day knowledge of how my diet affected blood sugar so I could control it. My doctor still doesn’t know I do it. Not trying to hide, it’s just never come up.

Abusers often present a different face to the world outside the home. 

 

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3 hours ago, Emma said:

You don’t need a prescription to buy a meter and test strips. I started doing it just to get a better day by day knowledge of how my diet affected blood sugar so I could control it. My doctor still doesn’t know I do it. Not trying to hide, it’s just never come up.

Abusers often present a different face to the world outside the home. 

 

Yup. I did get my meter and strips from prescription last time I got some. I have also orders some from the FSA store. There are also devices like https://www.freestylelibre.us/ that you stick on your arm, and can monitor glucose levels anytime from the app.

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Holy shit too much basic adulting today. Do not want. FedEx once again has fucked up my cat food delivery so I've been trying to track that down and making a bunch of phone calls, plus trying and failing to order shit from Target because I still feel like crap and don't want to go over. But hey now that's a moot point - I'll be driving by it tomorrow when I have to go get backup cat food from the vet so I may as well run in. I had other phone calls to make for unrelated things but it's 5pm now and things are closed. Also I haven't eaten yet at all today, which is super healthy. 

 

Unsurprisingly, my father is also in a mood. For no obvious reason. So that's not helping me right now.

 

I'll get back to y'all in a bit. My brain is jello and I don't think I can handle actual conversation. Unless it's going to make my fucking cat food appear. 

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Oof. I would really love to know if it’s allergies that are fucking me up or if I’m just rundown because my sleep schedule is fucked. Although my brother is doing cat breakfast in the morning so I can go to bed whenever I want and not have to wake up at 5:30. Yaaaaay I get to sleep. 
 

I don’t think I’m doing anything for the rest of the day. Probably just gonna play my video game until bedtime. My brain really is jello right now. I think it’s best to just chill for the night, quiet the gremlins, and go to bed much earlier than usual so I can get off to a good start tomorrow. Cross your fingers. 

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Surprise, it’s cat breakfast time and even though I don’t need to feed them today I’m awake anyway. 
 

Today is going to be rough in terms of spoon consumption. 3 places to run errands at, plus the stress of being in stores right now, plus I’m clearly not sleeping well. But I still need to clear all the shit off my floor and sweep/vacuum once my brother wakes up. Gentle check-ins and/or reminders this evening to get shit done would be appreciated. 

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