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11 hours ago, analoggirl said:

 

Ahhhh I would have done that too. Note to self, always keep a poop-flow-stopping blanket at hand when around babies and children 🤪

 

🍀🍀🍀

Ugh if only I hadn’t gotten out of the way!

 

10 hours ago, zenLara said:

You're trying to scare me on purpose, right? :D

Sorry, sounds really bad. I hope the cleaning didn't take much time...

 

That would be a nice thing to do. Maybe not the ideal situation to recover your income, but could help, and also you'd feel better having some activity to plan ahead.

Parks will be full, that's sure, but what about a nice spot in nature? You talk about these walks you take to the woods with your family, maybe you can find a quiet place for your groups.

Also, since you mentioned that your gym is big enough to keep even more safety distance than the recommended, maybe you can have someone check that (local or regional government or similar) and get permission to open. Just thinking. I don't know if that's possible, and if it is, you've probably thought about it already...

I haven’t been able to get it out of the mattress and the wood yet 😭😭 
 

and yes, we’ll definitely find a nice spot in the woods somewhere! Parking will take some thought.. and maybe I’ll keep the KB classes online because that really needs flat ground and hauling all that weight around isn’t ideal either.. but the other classes will be nice to do out there somewhere :) 
 

8 hours ago, raptron said:

Aghhh about the gym. But outdoor classes sound really lovely! 

wish we had an outdoor space near the gym though, using all the equipment would be so nice! What’s the expectation for your gym?
 

8 hours ago, Scalyfreak said:

 

If you can prove that to a health inspector, maybe you can get permission to be partially open? A lot of business around my area are open but are only allowed a certain number of customers in the store at a time, and there are markings on the floor to show how far apart people have to stay. If you can do something like that, maybe you will be able to stay open? The group classes sound great.

yea lots of stores have been open and more are reopening soon.. but they don’t want gyms open yet because of the faster breathing etc.. and air circulation isn’t awesome inside. 
 

7 hours ago, starsapart said:

Yay outside classes! I bet that will be nice once you figure out the logistics.

it’ll be really good to see everyone.. but all the things opening do make me nervous. I hope it all works out.
 

7 hours ago, miss_marissa said:

Outside classes would be so nice! I hope you can get it to work out.

We’ll figure something out :) 

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I don’t know why I can’t sleep, it seems really stupid when you’re this tired.. but might aswell journal then, right? 
 

Today (Friday) I was really sad. I just woke up sad and stayed sad. My dad hasn’t held my baby yet.. my grandparents might not get to see her at all.. I saw my best friend the other day and couldn’t let her hold Sophie.. ugh ugh. But it’s not just that, I grieve for the world that was.

 

but it was still a pretty good day.. I made really tasty dinner, with the first salad out of our garden.. I vacuumed upstairs very thoroughly for the first time in weeks.. I spend some quality time with Emma and we all watched Master Chef Junior before bed. I got lots and lots of hugs from Jaap. 

I cleaned both toilets. Had a shower and washed my hair in peace. I did a really short workout with one set of everything just to tick off that box. And Jaap and I discussed our goals for tomorrow, which is still very nice to do even if we usually don’t get it all done. 
 

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Let me tell you about this really cool thing that happened 7 weeks ago.... (not for the faint of heart)


march 20, 2020- 6:49

i was on hands and knees, with this very raw feeling, instinct and Mother Nature telling me what to do- calling it a push really doesn’t describe it very well, it’s this intense whole body experience- but after the second push I feel this relieve and I put my left hand between my legs.. I feel her head. With what can be best described as a sigh from my body, the rest of her body comes out. I grab her and pull her to my chest. 
 

I caught her myself. And it was the coolest, most awesome, most metal and most warrior experience of my life. 

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13 hours ago, analoggirl said:

Note to self, always keep a poop-flow-stopping blanket at hand when around babies and children 

 

 

Maybe you can go one step further and have an evacuation-extinguishing baby blanket. Like a fire blanket. You just throw it over them until they stop emitting danger.

 

1 hour ago, KB Girl said:

Today (Friday) I was really sad. I just woke up sad and stayed sad. My dad hasn’t held my baby yet.. my grandparents might not get to see her at all.. I saw my best friend the other day and couldn’t let her hold Sophie.. ugh ugh. But it’s not just that, I grieve for the world that was.

 

So sorry :( I hope it's at least a little comforting that you have friends and family out there, thinking of you, even if you can't touch them right now.

 

1 hour ago, KB Girl said:

Let me tell you about this really cool thing that happened 7 weeks ago.... (not for the faint of heart)

 

  Reveal hidden contents


march 20, 2020- 6:49

i was on hands and knees, with this very raw feeling, instinct and Mother Nature telling me what to do- calling it a push really doesn’t describe it very well, it’s this intense whole body experience- but after the second push I feel this relieve and I put my left hand between my legs.. I feel her head. With what can be best described as a sigh from my body, the rest of her body comes out. I grab her and pull her to my chest. 
 

I caught her myself. And it was the coolest, most awesome, most metal and most warrior experience of my life. 

 


Primal. Mighty. *nods approvingly*

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4 hours ago, KB Girl said:

I haven’t been able to get it out of the mattress and the wood yet 😭😭 

😨😨

 

3 hours ago, KB Girl said:

I made really tasty dinner, with the first salad out of our garden.. I vacuumed upstairs very thoroughly for the first time in weeks.. I spend some quality time with Emma and we all watched Master Chef Junior before bed. I got lots and lots of hugs from Jaap. 

I cleaned both toilets. Had a shower and washed my hair in peace. I did a really short workout with one set of everything just to tick off that box. And Jaap and I discussed our goals for tomorrow, which is still very nice to do even if we usually don’t get it all done. 

Sounds like a good day, indeed.

Sorry about the sadness, though. I hope things will change soon and you'll be able to spend time with your family.

 

3 hours ago, KB Girl said:

Let me tell you about this really cool thing that happened 7 weeks ago

😍

 

2 hours ago, Harriet said:

Maybe you can go one step further and have an evacuation-extinguishing baby blanket. Like a fire blanket. You just throw it over them until they stop emitting danger.

😂 I would buy one of those without even thinking

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In! I knew I was missing a thread somewhere :P

I remember your video from the championship, it was awesome ❤️ it will come again soon I hope (considering the covid situation).

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I hope you'll be doing well financially this summer!

 

It's so nice that you have fresh salad from the garden, what else will you have in your garden this year?

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19 hours ago, Harriet said:

So sorry :( I hope it's at least a little comforting that you have friends and family out there, thinking of you, even if you can't touch them right now.


Primal. Mighty. *nods approvingly*

Roar! 

Yes, I am very grateful for that. 

 

16 hours ago, zenLara said:

Sorry about the sadness, though. I hope things will change soon and you'll be able to spend time with your family.

It is hard to decide wether we should take the risk with our health.. it is sort of allowed and it's getting more and more tempting. 

 

16 hours ago, zenLara said:
19 hours ago, Harriet said:

Maybe you can go one step further and have an evacuation-extinguishing baby blanket. Like a fire blanket. You just throw it over them until they stop emitting danger.

😂 I would buy one of those without even thinking

Actually babies aren't so bad.. it's annoying that stuff is now coloured yellow because i can't get it out.. but as far as messes go <6 months is pretty harmless. The poop doesnt even smell if you're lucky enough to be able to exclusively breastfeed. It's when they start eating real food that it gets really bad... and then they throw food everywhere and then they put their messy little hands everywhere.. and then they wipe their snotty little faces on you.. yea, i'll go with the safety blanket when they're older.

 

13 hours ago, @mu said:

In! I knew I was missing a thread somewhere :P

I remember your video from the championship, it was awesome ❤️ it will come again soon I hope (considering the covid situation).

It wouldn't be the same without you! :D

2021 championships are planned to be in Scotland, sounds good right? I'll also have a year to get into shape. 

 

11 hours ago, Waanie said:

I hope you'll be doing well financially this summer!

 

It's so nice that you have fresh salad from the garden, what else will you have in your garden this year?

Thanks! we'll be alright somehow. 

We've got quite a lot of stuff, Jaap went all out on the garden this year.. there will be squash, pumpkin, tomatoes, strawberries, potatoes, several kinds of green beans, kapucijners, apples, raspberries, red berries, pointy cabbage, red cabbage, carrots, onions, beetroot, spinach.. and then there are quite a lot of herbs. oh and i think cauliflower. 

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12 hours ago, KB Girl said:

Jaap went all out on the garden this year.. there will be squash, pumpkin, tomatoes, strawberries, potatoes, several kinds of green beans, kapucijners, apples, raspberries, red berries, pointy cabbage, red cabbage, carrots, onions, beetroot, spinach.. and then there are quite a lot of herbs. oh and i think cauliflower.

Wow, that is a lot of work...

 

 

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1 minute ago, zenLara said:

Wow, that is a lot of work...

It also sounds incredibly tasty though! Especially with fruits and tomatoes, there's a huge difference in quality between home-grown and supermarket produce. I do remember disliking strawberries though, since I had to pick them so often when I was living with my parents.

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September! That really stinks. I hope you'll be able to figure it out with online and outdoor classes. 

 

On 5/9/2020 at 3:06 AM, KB Girl said:

Let me tell you about this really cool thing that happened 7 weeks ago.... (not for the faint of heart)

 

  Reveal hidden contents


march 20, 2020- 6:49

i was on hands and knees, with this very raw feeling, instinct and Mother Nature telling me what to do- calling it a push really doesn’t describe it very well, it’s this intense whole body experience- but after the second push I feel this relieve and I put my left hand between my legs.. I feel her head. With what can be best described as a sigh from my body, the rest of her body comes out. I grab her and pull her to my chest. 
 

I caught her myself. And it was the coolest, most awesome, most metal and most warrior experience of my life. 

 

That is so frickin' badass. And a much better story than the ones involving poop. :P 

 

20 hours ago, KB Girl said:

We've got quite a lot of stuff, Jaap went all out on the garden this year.. there will be squash, pumpkin, tomatoes, strawberries, potatoes, several kinds of green beans, kapucijners, apples, raspberries, red berries, pointy cabbage, red cabbage, carrots, onions, beetroot, spinach.. and then there are quite a lot of herbs. oh and i think cauliflower. 

Wow, I'm so jelly! 😍That's quite the upgrade from before, exciting.

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That garden sounds AMAZING. I wish I could commit to keeping plants alive. My mom gardens a ton and I helped her a lot as a kid, but as an adult, I just don't prioritize it.

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On 5/10/2020 at 11:30 AM, zenLara said:

Wow, that is a lot of work...

Yea you'd have to like the work to maintain it.. and it can be very nice/therapeutic. 

 

On 5/10/2020 at 7:44 PM, Mad Hatter said:

That is so frickin' badass. And a much better story than the ones involving poop. :P 

 

Wow, I'm so jelly! 😍That's quite the upgrade from before, exciting.

Thank you, thank you :D it felt really badass. 

And yes, i'm excited about it too! hoping it all works out too, to be honest. 

 

4 hours ago, starsapart said:

That garden sounds AMAZING. I wish I could commit to keeping plants alive. My mom gardens a ton and I helped her a lot as a kid, but as an adult, I just don't prioritize it.

I've always wanted this much, but i... well... i go through phases of obsession with things and those phases never last long enough to actually properly grow plants.. but Jaap picked up my wish and somehow made it his project, so :) win. I think it's good for the kids too. 

 

3 hours ago, raptron said:

OMG SO MANY VEGGIES. 🤩

 

And hell yeah at your birth story snippet. 🤘

:) you didnt nope out at the thought of a head coming through that way this time? :D

 

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Saturday was our work day.. we did a live session about stress and how to manage it. We had 8 gym folk watch it live and ask questions etc and recorded it for anyone wanting to watch later.. it was okayish, i stressed about doing it a lot, and it felt awkward enough.. but everyone said it was useful or at the very least thought provoking. We'll be doing it again next saturday, because there was plenty left to talk about. I did not move this day.. we did co-ordinate for the next day. 

 

Sunday was mothers day, Jaap and Emma made me a cake without milk protein in it, it was nice. I did a short training at home, lots of lunges, single leg deadlifts, DB presses and rows, core stuff and some upper back mobility work. My brother visited with us in the garden at a distance, it was also sort of nice. And my baby sister dropped off a care package with vegan chocolate and other yumm stuff and a really nice card, with nice words and a drawing (she lived with us for 2 years when she was 16-18). We walked the dog together for an hour, I carried the baby in a wrap. Moved twice, but no co-ordinating because we both noped out. 

 

Monday morning it was cold and windy but we still packed everything up and went for a hike+picknick in the woods. We had a really good division of labour, Jaap packed the food for us and I brought the baby food. We should have been working today and getting things set up for outdoor classes and communicating with everyone about how/what/where/when but... well we noped out some more. We're both feeling rather awful. I just really wish things could go back to how they used to be... and working on how we're not going to do that for the next 3? 6? 12? months is really depressing. Sorry. Jaap just went to bed and we noped out on co-ordinating again. It's past midnight and.. well.. yes i've had alone time, but it's not really making me feel any better so i shouldve just gone to sleep (or at least tried to) much earlier. 

 

Maybe we'll get our shit together tomorrow. Or maybe not. We'll see. 

But i'm thinking maybe i'll go and do deadlifts, that ought to make me feel better. 

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Mother's Day sounds nice. Glad you enjoyed it.Woot for doing the live session and pushing past the awkwardness. I'm sorry about the gym uncertainity and turmoil. It's hard. Give yourself time to adjust, and don't beat yourself up . You did something great this weekend with the session on dealing with stress and that's a big win

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Yay for cake! If you have two children, are you a twice-mother and therefore get two cakes, though? Or is it just one cake no matter how many? 


Sorry about the awful crisis related doom feelings :( 

 

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3 hours ago, KB Girl said:

 

Monday morning it was cold and windy but we still packed everything up and went for a hike+picknick in the woods. We had a really good division of labour, Jaap packed the food for us and I brought the baby food. We should have been working today and getting things set up for outdoor classes and communicating with everyone about how/what/where/when but... well we noped out some more. We're both feeling rather awful. I just really wish things could go back to how they used to be... and working on how we're not going to do that for the next 3? 6? 12? months is really depressing. Sorry. Jaap just went to bed and we noped out on co-ordinating again. It's past midnight and.. well.. yes i've had alone time, but it's not really making me feel any better so i shouldve just gone to sleep (or at least tried to) much earlier. 

 

Maybe we'll get our shit together tomorrow. Or maybe not. We'll see. 

But i'm thinking maybe i'll go and do deadlifts, that ought to make me feel better.

Hey, you're a sleep-deprived parent of a newborn. Please be easy on yourself.

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4 hours ago, KB Girl said:

Maybe we'll get our shit together tomorrow. Or maybe not. We'll see. 

But i'm thinking maybe i'll go and do deadlifts, that ought to make me feel better. 

 

What Tank said.

 

Give yourself a break. You're actually doing really impressively well.

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Sorry that things feel so upside down right now, but as others said, you're doing well. I'd say try to rest as much as you can; I know how difficult it must be with two small children, though. There is a lot on your plate in these moments, but it is not always going to be like that. Take care.

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15 hours ago, KB Girl said:

But i'm thinking maybe i'll go and do deadlifts, that ought to make me feel better. 

<456 !

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Hi, I think you're amazing, and that you're doing great, and I am sending all my love over the ocean to you. Also, agreed with the above: even if you think you've got a handle on it, being sleep deprived honestly does SUCH a number on you, and even in a perfect, healthy world situation can cripple you with sadness and anxiety, so please give yourself some grace when you're feeling low. There are a lot of factors making life really tough for you right now, and you're doing your best. Even if "your best" isn't up to the standard you've set yourself, it doesn't mean it's not the best you have on that particular day. And if you've done your best, you have nothing to be ashamed of. I tell myself this a lot and I hope it can help you too.

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