Terinatum Tiptoes Along

[Terinatum]

UPDATE:

Day 15          Sunday

 

 

GOALS

My first goal is to check in here each day: Nope

 

My second goal is to do my exercise walk each day: No

 

My third goal is to meditate for 10 minutes each day: Nothing

 

My forth goal is to reach out to people IRL via texts, zoom, and phone: Yes, N. 

 

Overall:

Grocery shopping and some leg-work with K re: personal life

 

Cheers

[Terinatum]

UPDATE:

Day 16         Monday

 

 

GOALS

My first goal is to check in here each day: Nope

 

My second goal is to do my exercise walk each day: Yes

 

My third goal is to meditate for 10 minutes each day: Nothing

 

My forth goal is to reach out to people IRL via texts, zoom, and phone: No one

 

Overall:

Did too much physical stuff and am paying the price. I also have 2 stressors (1 good, 1 not) that have sent me into a major obsessive rejection of reality. I am focusing so strong on my gaming characters that I can't stop talking things through even if I've said the same thing moments before. Still in obsessive land, but was able to get a walk in and a nice shower.
Don't like that I've been shirking my walks.

 

Cheers

[Terinatum]

Confusion - double post. Edited above. oops!

[fearless 2.0]

Ha, I missed you by 3 hours!  

Big hug!

[Athena]

Just checking in to show support! 

 

[Scaly Freak]

7 hours ago, Terinatum said:

 

Overall: Still in obsessive land, but was able to get a walk in and a nice shower.

 

I have really started to appreciate showers recently. Very relaxing.  

[WhiteGhost]

14 hours ago, Terinatum said:

I am focusing so strong on my gaming characters

What kind of gaming are you doing?

[Terinatum]

39 minutes ago, WhiteGhost said:

What kind of gaming are you doing?

 

I do Pathfinder 1.0 I have several campaigns going, but we only have 2 1/2 GMs (still say DM,  but I'm getting better!). I'm running one that has been on hold since Fall, but I'm ramping up for a new string of sessions which is exciting for me.

My obsession has been with a character that I multi-classed which ended up in a high-powered war-like campaign and she hasn't powered up like everyone else (we were told we were doing a kingdom-building game ~Not!). My anxiety got so bad playing her b/c I felt I was letting the other players down and I felt powerless. My PTSD HATES that.

So I rearranged her (using an alternate way of multi-classing) and then told (didn't ask/whine [assuming I do this] - which is new for me) my GM and Party that this had to happen in order for me to stay sane and happy while playing her.

 

I grew up with D&D but my friends and I are going the cheaper route. I haven't been active the whole time with D&D so I don't have up-to-date knowledge but I've been following GreatGM and learning by osmosis [not that he puts me to sleep!].

What are you playing? Are you doing streaming or PbP or both?

[WhiteGhost]

2 minutes ago, Terinatum said:

 

I do Pathfinder 1.0 I have several campaigns going, but we only have 2 1/2 GMs (still say DM,  but I'm getting better!). I'm running one that has been on hold since Fall, but I'm ramping up for a new string of sessions which is exciting for me.

My obsession has been with a character that I multi-classed which ended up in a high-powered war-like campaign and she hasn't powered up like everyone else (we were told we were doing a kingdom-building game ~Not!). My anxiety got so bad playing her b/c I felt I was letting the other players down and I felt powerless. My PTSD HATES that.

So I rearranged her (using an alternate way of multi-classing) and then told (didn't ask/whine [assuming I do this] - which is new for me) my GM and Party that this had to happen in order for me to stay sane and happy while playing her.

 

I grew up with D&D but my friends and I are going the cheaper route. I haven't been active the whole time with D&D so I don't have up-to-date knowledge but I've been following GreatGM and learning by osmosis [not that he puts me to sleep!].

What are you playing? Are you doing streaming or PbP or both?

I will probably say DM for the rest of my life - some thing are just not important enough to work on breaking the habits.  I played D&D as a teenager back in the 80s/90s but then stopped for many years because of life and am only now getting back into it.

 

As for cost, I have found everything I need for D&D (all the manuals and a few campaign modules) for free online.  It seems a lot of people are making things available because of the quarantine to increase participation.

 

Good on you for getting your character fixed.  I have been reading the D&D DMG recently and it spells out explicitly that in these situations the DM should proactively work with the player to make sure that both the character is appropriate for the campaign and the the player is enjoying the experience, even if it means making out of game changes.

 

I am currently doing a few D&D sessions, one that streams on Roll20, one that is a hybrid stream/PbP (one live session per month with the rest PbP) on Discord, one pure PbP that hasn't started yet, and a live session that I am putting together for my son who has been watching me play and wants to try it out.

[Terinatum]

UPDATE:

Day 17         Tuesday

 

 

GOALS

My first goal is to check in here each day: Yes.

 

My second goal is to do my exercise walk each day: No, dealing with neck and hip pain - hip like walks,  neck does not!

 

My third goal is to meditate for 10 minutes each day: No

 

My forth goal is to reach out to people IRL via texts, zoom, and phone: No, but I had therapy which was good.

 

Overall:

My two stressors are more in control which is good. My good stressor is that someone is going to be staying with me and it triggers my 'alone' time/space. I love that fact that she's coming so it's not about her. This would happen no matter who. Plus this will be good practice living how I want to live. Able to deal with stressors from good things without spiraling down before/during/after.

My second stressor was mixed in with my gaming anxiety so I think (my therapist helped me with this) I was building up stress in any part of my life that I could and the bad thing that happened got blown out of proportion in my head b/c it's been working 100 hour weeks lately. Now I have my gaming-anxiety settled and my realization in my consciousness, I have calmed me down tremendously.

I slept the rest of today and got my neck settled down some. So I will resume my walks in the AM tomorrow.

 

Cheers

[Terinatum]

5 minutes ago, WhiteGhost said:

I will probably say DM for the rest of my life - some thing are just not important enough to work on breaking the habits.  I played D&D as a teenager back in the 80s/90s but then stopped for many years because of life and am only now getting back into it.

 

As for cost, I have found everything I need for D&D (all the manuals and a few campaign modules) for free online.  It seems a lot of people are making things available because of the quarantine to increase participation.

 

Good on you for getting your character fixed.  I have been reading the D&D DMG recently and it spells out explicitly that in these situations the DM should proactively work with the player to make sure that both the character is appropriate for the campaign and the the player is enjoying the experience, even if it means making out of game changes.

 

I am currently doing a few D&D sessions, one that streams on Roll20, one that is a hybrid stream/PbP (one live session per month with the rest PbP) on Discord, one pure PbP that hasn't started yet, and a live session that I am putting together for my son who has been watching me play and wants to try it out.

Sweet.
Are you getting your info on Beyond or Trove? I would love to get more in depth info.

We are using Roll20 as well. And I might start looking for a PbP as I really liked it when I did it here, years ago.

Hope your son gets a good game from you. Although I already suspect he will!

[WhiteGhost]

26 minutes ago, Terinatum said:

Are you getting your info on Beyond or Trove?

I was getting it from Beyond but I have to use a proxy software to access it and my proxy has been really unstable recently so I have only had very limited access.  

 

For now I am relying pretty much on just the manuals

[fearless 2.0]

Hi Terri, just leaving you a hug here. Feel better soon!

 

[Zaphine]

*hug*  

[darkfoxx]

Sharing love for Roll20! I’m playing Blades In The Dark with a group of friends and we are loving the setup. I still have my analog notebook beside me, but loooooooove that we don’t have to print anything.

[Terinatum]

Sweet,
Thanks for all the love. I'm quite stressed, but managing.
 

On 5/27/2020 at 12:49 AM, fearless 2.0 said:

Hi Terri, just leaving you a hug here. Feel better soon!

 

 

On 6/9/2020 at 10:36 AM, Zaphine said:

*hug*  

 

On 6/10/2020 at 4:16 AM, darkfoxx said:

Sharing love for Roll20! I’m playing Blades In The Dark with a group of friends and we are loving the setup. I still have my analog notebook beside me, but loooooooove that we don’t have to print anything.

 

Such great support here. Love you all.
Will post here tomorrow to update more specifically.
Cheers