Terah - Finding balance

[Terah]

20 hours ago, LostValkyrie19 said:

Are you spacing out your run days? Don't push too hard at first, running can be difficult.  

I started when Nerd Fitness did the 5k challenge, and have never run before that. A good friend gave me great advice, always keep telling yourself to run easy, don't outpace yourself or try to always go fast.

 

I was using the couch to 5k app for getting into running, I was all kinds of sore after it. I didn't realize the lungs and torso would hurt me as much as they did, weird cramps and stuff. 

 

I didn't have any neck or hip pain though. You might need to look at your shoes and running stance. They affect your stride/footfalls. 
There is some pretty good advice in this NF article: https://www.nerdfitness.com/blog/running-properly/

I did space my run days, and didn't go all out.

That article is really helpful, thanks for sharing! I think I need to focus more on my eating habits and strength training before I go running. 

 

19 hours ago, Jittersthe.Clown said:

Pain in the hips isn't that uncommon, but the neck may require some form checks, possibly a medical professional.

I think my muscles are just too weak. And I also have an really old neck injury (no idea how I even got it, a chiropractor discovered it when I was a teen, using an x-ray), and I don't think that's helpful too in this case

[Terah]

Saturday was the first day of Peter's birthday celebrations. My FIL and his wife came in the morning. My FIL wanted to shake my hand and hug the kids, but because covid, I refused and offered to bump elbows instead (as the boys have learned to do at school). He exclaimed that if this were the case he shouldn't have come. As my eyes widened in disbelieve, my husband gave the best reply ever: "Okay, bye!"  

Which shocked him enough to not be an asshole anymore and behave. 

Talking to them is quite difficult, as his wife is Russian. She lived a while in Scottland, so she does know some broken English. My FIL speaks broken English as well. And the level of English me and my husband are able to speak is beyond them (and yes, the both of us have a huge accent). So that was fun...

 

My MIL came at the end of the afternoon. She kept at a save distance and was just a really sweet grandma  

Today we'll have more family coming in shifts. Wish me luck 

[deftona]

1 hour ago, Terah said:

Talking to them is quite difficult, as his wife is Russian. She lived a while in Scottland, so she does know some broken English. My FIL speaks broken English as well. And the level of English me and my husband are able to speak is beyond them (and yes, the both of us have a huge accent). So that was fun...

 

So his girlfriend doesn't speak Dutch?! How do they communicate? (or can I guess )

[Terah]

2 hours ago, deftona said:

 

So his girlfriend doesn't speak Dutch?! How do they communicate? (or can I guess )

She knows a few words Dutch, not enough to make a sentance. They communicate in broken English. But I guess they mostly communicate by her shoving food into his mouth. My FIL has gotten huge in their years together. He gets winded when he walks from his car to our front door (which is like 10 meters).

I don't think they are able to communicate in the way you're implying though

[Scaly Freak]

9 hours ago, Terah said:

Saturday was the first day of Peter's birthday celebrations. My FIL and his wife came in the morning. My FIL wanted to shake my hand and hug the kids, but because covid, I refused and offered to bump elbows instead (as the boys have learned to do at school). He exclaimed that if this were the case he shouldn't have come. As my eyes widened in disbelieve, my husband gave the best reply ever: "Okay, bye!"  

 

Points for a good husband. Guests should display the basic courtesy of not being an asshole to their hosts.

[Tanktimus the Encourager]

8 hours ago, Terah said:

She knows a few words Dutch, not enough to make a sentance. They communicate in broken English.

So many questions....

Now that I think about it thought, I don't want any answers.

[Terah]

The festivities around Peter's birthday continued on Sunday with first my SIL and her boyfriend. She's been struggling with clinical depression for years, but this Sunday she looked really good. She actually engaged in conversation and played a few games with us and the boys. I'm really glad she's doing so much better  

In the afternoon my sister and her boyfriend came by. We had a good time playing games.

And in the evening my parents came to eat pizza together (Peter's request). When they first arrived Cory had a melt down. Both boys have been diagnosed with autism at the end of spring, so I knew what was going on. The boy was just overstimulated from all those visitors. I took him upstairs and after he cried a bit I managed to distract him and after that even talk about the incident. I could tell Peter was getting overwhelmed too, but he doesn't cry, he just shuts himself off from the rest of the world. He managed to do it in a way that he could still carry a bit of a conversation with my parents, and I'm really proud of him for doing so well. The boys played a game with my parents while husband and I went to get the pizza, and we had a very pleasant evening. 

 

Monday morning I somehow got lost in playing the sims. I have a rule for myself that I don't play computer games during a workday. I just really felt like I NEEDED to do so. I just started building and suddenly I was hungry. Looking at the time it was lunch time already. I had been building for 4 hours straight... I felt really guilty for not doing the stuff I should have been doing and I did everything that absolutely had to be done while eating lunch. Not the healthiest way, but I didn't really had another choice at the moment. That evening I reflected on what happened, and I realized I had been overwhelmed by all those visitors that weekend too. And after building in the sims my brain felt soooo much better. Although I still feel a little guilty, I recognize I just needed this to wind down to not have a melt down of my own. 

 

So today I'm working overtime to finish the stuff I left yesterday. I'm almost back on schedule  

[Tobbe]

You are all being so hard on the FIL and his wife. Can't we just celebrate the fact that they love each other, and even though they can't verbally communicate as well as two native speakers would, they still stay together. Amor vincit omnia? Love conquers all.

 

Does anyone know where the elbow greeting comes from? I think it's great and I've been using it myself.

[Captain Gilly]

On 9/27/2020 at 3:43 AM, Terah said:

 He exclaimed that if this were the case he shouldn't have come. As my eyes widened in disbelieve, my husband gave the best reply ever: "Okay, bye!"  

 

This is fine, not like we are in the middle of worldwide pandemic...I am glad that your husband was on it though, awesome team!

About the boys - while autism is hard, it looks like you are caring and supportive, with someone like you in their live, they will always have the support they need and be ready to grow. You are proud of Peter, be proud of yourself here too, you are both amazing

ALSO - Sometimes you just need to let go and if building for a bit after so much peopling was needed, you build! Don't feel guilty for giving yourself a little joy. 

[Terah]

46 minutes ago, Tobbe said:

You are all being so hard on the FIL and his wife. Can't we just celebrate the fact that they love each other, and even though they can't verbally communicate as well as two native speakers would, they still stay together. Amor vincit omnia? Love conquers all.

 

Does anyone know where the elbow greeting comes from? I think it's great and I've been using it myself.

Well, like like Valkyrie said, it's not fine because pandemic and all. And he was a real dick when leaving my MIL for this Russian woman*. So I have a strong dislike for the man. This didn't help.

 

*He didn't tell my MIL he found another woman until he left to pick her up from the airport. He had his suitcase packed and an apartment rented already. My MIL didn't saw it coming at all. It was a real cowardly move. He's always been a coward, but this was low, even for him.

 

I think our prime minister was the one that introduced us to it. I don't know where it originated. But I think it's smart  

 

45 minutes ago, LostValkyrie19 said:

I am glad that your husband was on it though, awesome team!

Thank you  I think so too. He doesn't always believe me when I tell him, but he's really awesome  

 

46 minutes ago, LostValkyrie19 said:

About the boys - while autism is hard, it looks like you are caring and supportive, with someone like you in their live, they will always have the support they need and be ready to grow. You are proud of Peter, be proud of yourself here too, you are both amazing

Aw, thank you  

 

46 minutes ago, LostValkyrie19 said:

Don't feel guilty for giving yourself a little joy.

You're right. I need to remember this

[deftona]

2 hours ago, Terah said:

And he was a real dick when leaving my MIL for this Russian woman

 

I remember when this happened. 

 

Eff this guy.

[Terah]

32 minutes ago, deftona said:

 

I remember when this happened. 

 

Eff this guy.

My thoughts exactly. But husband wants him back in his life. So I suck it up and be polite when he comes over. Husband does know what I think of him though, but he is like 'yeah, he's always been a dick' and is at peace with it, because there is nothing he can do to change him. 

[Snarkyfishguts]

Terah, this is your thread. You can complain about your asshole FiL all you want.

[Tobbe]

6 hours ago, Terah said:

Well, like like Valkyrie said, it's not fine because pandemic and all.

 

Yeah, obviously not trying to defend his behavior *at all*!

 

6 hours ago, Terah said:

*He didn't tell my MIL he found another woman until he left to pick her up from the airport. He had his suitcase packed and an apartment rented already. My MIL didn't saw it coming at all. It was a real cowardly move. He's always been a coward, but this was low, even for him.

 

[Terah]

This just got recommended to me on YouTube. I thought you guys might appreciate it too  

 

 

[deftona]

I love that video, it's all true! 

[Terah]

Last Saturday we had Peter's kids party. Secret agent style  

I had purchased a kids party schedule and just followed that with a few adjustments when necessary. The kids had a lot of fun doing all the games, and Peter had a great time with his friends  I had purchased party glasses and fake mustaches. The kids looked so cute! 

I was exhausted afterwards, but I'm glad I could give him a good birthday party  

[Captain Gilly]

Party glasses and fake moustaches...I miss this. I wonder if I got these and stealthed around the house my husband would question my sanity? He would probably steal them lol. 

 

That sounds like an amazing day! 

[Terah]

I've been feeling a bit under the weather. Possibly because all this rain I keep having to bike through  The price for living in the Netherlands (although I hear England is even worse  )

Husband has been working from home this week, because of the second corona wave our country is experiencing. I like having him around all day  The boys are loving it too: so much attention from dad