How to rebuild a Wolverine

[Ensi]

7 hours ago, Lara said:

Woke up ready to get back into paleo, not only because of last night conversation, but because I've been thinking for a while it's time to get back on the wagon, and as soon as I entered the living room reality slapped me in the face in the shape of a plate of casadielles nonchalantly forgotten there last night by my boyfriend.

 

I'm sure this was a real obstacle back in the stone age... So, just keep going with the lifestyle!

[Lara]

18.1

No cold shower. 3 breathing cycles. 

Healthy meals: lunch and dinner. 

Going out: nope. 

A thing I enjoy: a few days ago, one of my students sent me a recording of his last concert asking for a review, and I listened to it today and sent him my thoughts on the piece. 

How do I feel meditation: relief. Sighed several times. 

[Lara]

19.1

Cold shower 1 minute. No breathing cycles.

Going out: 1 hour walk outside town.

Healthy meals: lunch, afternoon snack. 

A thing I enjoy: listening to music early in the morning. 

How do I feel meditation: pending.  

 

I thought casadielles were over, but he said he's going to prepare a batch every month until he gets better 😨 I thought he was joking but I saw today there's a new box of walnuts in the kitchen 😒

 

I didn't think the snow would hold for so long, but ten days after the storm and you can still very easily end up with snow up to your knees 

[Mad Hatter]

Just now, Lara said:

I thought casadielles were over, but he said he's going to prepare a batch every month until he gets better 😨 I thought he was joking but I saw today there's a new box of walnuts in the kitchen 😒

Oh no? Sorry, I’m failing at sympathy here. 😆

 

The snow is so preeeetty!

[Lara]

20.1

No cold shower. No breathing cycles. 

A thing I enjoy: movement: FRC mobility (neck, shoulders, thorax, elbows, hips) + DR exercises. It really looks like the gap is closed, my fingers go up instead of down when I do a crunch, so maybe I could start with some easy yoga now and then, when I find moments along the day.

Going out: stayed home to avoid the temptation to buy crap food.

Healthy meals: all of them. 

How do I feel meditation: satisfaction, well-being, calm, need to cry. 

 

I'm going (to try) to spend 3-4 days without bread, pastries and things of the sort. For me, in the first place, and then to check possible dairy and wheat problems with Wolvie. I've got nothing to lose and it's something that I'm going to need to do sooner or later. 

 

I've also been thinking about which is going to be my mindset when I get back into exercising and music practice. It's clear to me that something has to change if I want to be truly happy about those areas of my life.

Reading Kenny Werner's Effortless mastery was an eye-opener regarding my attitude towards practice and performance, and I'd like to start by coming back to it and journal about some of the topics covered. 

And on movement, well, I like the "focus on the process" approach, but then I have tendency to go after every shiny thing and that's not how you get results. Which wouldn't matter if it weren't because sooner or later I'll feel frustrated for not having any tangible achievements. As soon as I began thinking about what I'd do, plenty of things came to mind (handstands, animal flow, yoga, off-road running and what not) and thinking that way will inevitably drive me to wanting to do all the things, and it is clear that anyway I'm not going to have time to create a consistent routine for all those activities.

So a bit at a loss here. Suggestions and advice in this regard would be very welcome.

[Mad Hatter]

52 minutes ago, Lara said:

my fingers go up instead of down when I do a crunch,

what does this mean?

 

53 minutes ago, Lara said:

So a bit at a loss here. Suggestions and advice in this regard would be very welcome.

I'm absolutely the worst at this, but I think the magic word here is periodization.

[Lara]

1 hour ago, Mad Hatter said:

what does this mean?

If you do a crunch while placing a couple of your fingers perpendicular to your belly, your abs will push them away from you. But if there is a gap, when you do the crunch the fingers will sink down into your belly. That's what happened to me in the area right above my belly button.

 

1 hour ago, Mad Hatter said:

I'm absolutely the worst at this, but I think the magic word here is periodization.

I have no idea of what this is. I'll do a search. Thanks!

[Endor]

14 hours ago, Lara said:

Suggestions

You like walking in nature and pretending to see wild animals.  Do that.  

[Lara]

47 minutes ago, Endor said:

You like walking in nature and pretending to see wild animals.  Do that.  

Unicorns are real. I see them. Get over it.

[Lara]

16 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

I think the magic word here is periodization.

I've read a bit about it here. Seems complex and needs planning and smart goals, a better way of training than rambling from one thing to the next 😅

I see it can be applied to music practice too; I have a lot to rebuild and will probably find myself wanting to work on every aspect at once.

So, many thanks for the idea!

[Mad Hatter]

5 minutes ago, Lara said:

I've read a bit about it here. Seems complex and needs planning and smart goals, a better way of training than rambling from one thing to the next 😅

I see it can be applied to music practice too; I have a lot to rebuild and will probably find myself wanting to work on every aspect at once.

So, many thanks for the idea!

It doesn't have to be complicated.  For example my ex parkour teacher does aerial rope, floor acro, parkour, handstands and cyr wheel. Every 3 months she chooses two activities that complement each other. So for example handstands and cyr wheel are in many ways quite similar so she wouldn't do those two in the same phase. Besides a small loss in endurance a 3 months break won't really affect your level of skill and strength too much (as long as you're still active) 

[Lara]

1 hour ago, Mad Hatter said:

It doesn't have to be complicated.  For example my ex parkour teacher does aerial rope, floor acro, parkour, handstands and cyr wheel. Every 3 months she chooses two activities that complement each other. So for example handstands and cyr wheel are in many ways quite similar so she wouldn't do those two in the same phase. Besides a small loss in endurance a 3 months break won't really affect your level of skill and strength too much (as long as you're still active) 

Good example. It helps, thanks.

I'll sit down and think about what I want to do and will post the plan once it's more or less defined.

[KB Girl]

23 hours ago, Lara said:

And on movement, well, I like the "focus on the process" approach, but then I have tendency to go after every shiny thing and that's not how you get results. Which wouldn't matter if it weren't because sooner or later I'll feel frustrated for not having any tangible achievements. As soon as I began thinking about what I'd do, plenty of things came to mind (handstands, animal flow, yoga, off-road running and what not) and thinking that way will inevitably drive me to wanting to do all the things, and it is clear that anyway I'm not going to have time to create a consistent routine for all those activities.

 

apart from just enjoying movement and chasing some shiny skills, what is it that you want to achieve? or is that it? 

[Lara]

21.1

Cold shower: 1 minute. 3 breathing cycles.

Healthy meals: all of them.

A thing I enjoy: movement, FRC (neck, thorax, shoulders, scapula). 

Going out: walked for about one hour.

How do I feel meditation: couldn't focus, didn't find out. 

 

[Lara]

13 hours ago, KB Girl said:

apart from just enjoying movement and chasing some shiny skills, what is it that you want to achieve? or is that it? 

Spoilered because of length and severe rambling.

 

Spoiler

I'm still uncertain of my goals.

 

What first came to mind is that I need to start moving to recover a bit. I haven't been this sedentary in years and my body is feeling it. My thoughts are to use yoga, mobility exercises and walks to start solving this.

Once I get better, there are three main areas I always like to work on: flexibility/mobility, strength, and stamina.

These past years, I've been using running off-trail for the last one, yoga for the first one, and plenty of different activities for strength (some of which I deeply miss, like fighting), all bodyweight because it's what I have the most fun with.

It occurred to me, that since time is short and probably will be for a long while, I could choose animal flow and get everything with just one activity, since depending on how it's used, animal flow is good to build the three skills I want. Only that I found I have a lot of resistance to abandon yoga because it's something I enjoy, and on the other side animal flow is tough and I felt overwhelmed by my own idea.

 

But, if I want tangible results, I should choose s.m.a.r.t. goals instead of just thinking "I want to be more flexible, and stronger, and have more endurance", I should set specific goals. Only that when I do this, I end up feeling frustrated because I never achieve them.

That happens mostly because of bad planning or being too ambitious, but I always decide to think it's because I'm an extremely puny human that will never achieve anything regarding fitness and I quit/get frustrated/switch to a different activity. That's one of the reasons I need a mindset shift.

If I were to follow the path of specific goals, then I'd probably choose the ones I've always wanted: handstand and pull-up, and maybe full bridge. I have never been really close to them, probably because I never followed the proper progression for any of them.

 

After I wrote about all of this, I got overwhelmed thinking I'm never going to have time for any of that and I should stop being so ambitious, at least by now, and just try to keep mobility and walks, add some yoga, and wait for easier times.  But even if I do that, sooner or later I'm going to have to decide what to do. 

 

[Mad Hatter]

What's interesting to me is that in the first paragraph you're talking about recovery and fun and enjoyment! In the second paragraph you're talking about things you should do like goals and results, and frustration. Curious. 😉

[Lara]

50 minutes ago, Mad Hatter said:

What's interesting to me is that in the first paragraph you're talking about recovery and fun and enjoyment! In the second paragraph you're talking about things you should do like goals and results, and frustration. Curious. 😉

Hmm. The way I see it is that those shoulds are not for me, but something I'd better do if I want to get results, otherwise I might complain later when I don't get the pull up or whatever. I could have found a better way to express it, though.

BUT yes, fun has to be there whatever I choose to do, or the battle will be lost before it even starts.

 

[Lara]

22.1

Cold shower: 1 minute. No breathing cycles.

Healthy meals: all of them.

A thing I enjoy: yoga (it was awful).

Going out: didn't feel like getting outside, so it probably was what I needed most: 45 minutes walk.

What do I feel meditation: chest pressure, anxiety. 

 

Grumpy day. Sleep hasn't been good this week, and today, every time I had a moment to take a nap, it was ruined by someone (postman, postman again —and it wasn't even for us, they just rang our bell to ask someone to open the front door—, then a neighbour decided to hang 100 paintings). When I finally could sleep in peace I just couldn't and cried out of frustration.

 

Tried to begin journaling about music practice but I didn't get too far: Wolvie stopped playing with her toys and thought it was more fun to steal the pencil from my hand. I put three more pencils on the floor, so I could have a replacement every time she took mine, and we ended having this weird pencils dance. It was fun, but I didn’t get much done. 

[Lara]

23.3

Cold shower: 1 minute. No breathing cycles.

Healthy meals: all of them. Body is not happy that all those carbs disappeared. 

Going out: walking outside town, 1 hour. Another 30 minutes in the evening. 

A thing I enjoy: yoga, only that I'm not enjoying it at all. 

What do I feel meditation: anguish, fear, relief. 

 

Day was different today: I slept SEVEN hours. Week had been awful, and last night my boyfriend put Wolvie in the carrier to allow me to sleep a couple of hours in a row. To my surprise, he came to leave the kid in bed because his back was tired of carrying her... for four hours! I thought she would want to eat, but she just continued to sleep in bed for another two hours. Then she woke up, nursed, slept for another two hours during what usually is her messy time, woke up again to eat and slept another hour. We were puzzled. I slept 3:45+45+1:30+1. This has not happened even once in the past four months. I don't want to celebrate too soon, because this could be a one-time event, but gosh, what an easy day today. It was awfully windy outside (my only no-no weather) and I didn't even care, left the house happily and full of energy. Then I used her nap after lunch to sit by her side in bed listening to music. In the afternoon I was still in good spirits and did a few (frustrating) yoga poses. 

Let's cross fingers for tonight!

 

 

[Tanktimus the Encourager]

Yay for sleep!

[Ensi]

On 1/22/2021 at 9:14 AM, Lara said:

Spoilered because of length and severe rambling.

 

  Hide contents

I'm still uncertain of my goals.

 

What first came to mind is that I need to start moving to recover a bit. I haven't been this sedentary in years and my body is feeling it. My thoughts are to use yoga, mobility exercises and walks to start solving this.

Once I get better, there are three main areas I always like to work on: flexibility/mobility, strength, and stamina.

These past years, I've been using running off-trail for the last one, yoga for the first one, and plenty of different activities for strength (some of which I deeply miss, like fighting), all bodyweight because it's what I have the most fun with.

It occurred to me, that since time is short and probably will be for a long while, I could choose animal flow and get everything with just one activity, since depending on how it's used, animal flow is good to build the three skills I want. Only that I found I have a lot of resistance to abandon yoga because it's something I enjoy, and on the other side animal flow is tough and I felt overwhelmed by my own idea.

 

But, if I want tangible results, I should choose s.m.a.r.t. goals instead of just thinking "I want to be more flexible, and stronger, and have more endurance", I should set specific goals. Only that when I do this, I end up feeling frustrated because I never achieve them.

That happens mostly because of bad planning or being too ambitious, but I always decide to think it's because I'm an extremely puny human that will never achieve anything regarding fitness and I quit/get frustrated/switch to a different activity. That's one of the reasons I need a mindset shift.

If I were to follow the path of specific goals, then I'd probably choose the ones I've always wanted: handstand and pull-up, and maybe full bridge. I have never been really close to them, probably because I never followed the proper progression for any of them.

 

After I wrote about all of this, I got overwhelmed thinking I'm never going to have time for any of that and I should stop being so ambitious, at least by now, and just try to keep mobility and walks, add some yoga, and wait for easier times.  But even if I do that, sooner or later I'm going to have to decide what to do. 

 

 

Just bolded out some parts. If your goal is to move to recover a bit, maybe focus on that goal for now? If your body is tired and out of shape, it definitely feels overwhelming to think about bigger goals that you might have in the future. Your exercise routine doesn't need to be perfect, but some movement is a lot better than nothing! And once you feel recovered, you might find that you are a lot more excited to start thinking of other goals Could you do animal flow on a couple of days a week and yoga a couple of days a week? And do this routine for a month or two, and then see how you feel? And maybe shift the focus from specific goals to feeling good for now?

 

(Sorry if I miss something important here, I only know what I'm reading from your post )

[Lara]

9 hours ago, Ensi said:

 

Just bolded out some parts. If your goal is to move to recover a bit, maybe focus on that goal for now? If your body is tired and out of shape, it definitely feels overwhelming to think about bigger goals that you might have in the future. Your exercise routine doesn't need to be perfect, but some movement is a lot better than nothing! And once you feel recovered, you might find that you are a lot more excited to start thinking of other goals Could you do animal flow on a couple of days a week and yoga a couple of days a week? And do this routine for a month or two, and then see how you feel? And maybe shift the focus from specific goals to feeling good for now?

 

(Sorry if I miss something important here, I only know what I'm reading from your post )

If I'm honest with myself, yours is the best solution, focus on recovery. I think I got too excited because I had a few days with a bit more time and got thrilled about getting back into fitness. A few stressful days later, though, my mind is more about "do you really think you're going to find time even for yoga?"

Anyway, maybe today isn't the best day to answer you or to think about any of this. I had an awful night, and day is being long and tiresome and I just want to sleep forever and be left alone 😔

 

24.1

It was a one-time event... 

 

No cold shower. No breathing cycles.

Healthy meals: all of them, but hangry.

A thing I enjoy:  nothing here.

Going out: 20 minutes around the neighbourhood.

What do I feel meditation: frustration, sadness. 

[WhiteGhost]

On 1/21/2021 at 2:28 AM, Lara said:

but then I have tendency to go after every shiny thing and that's not how you get results

I feel very called out 😡

 

On 1/24/2021 at 6:27 AM, Lara said:

I slept SEVEN hours

NICE!  May this trend be ever in your favor

[Endor]

Just dropped by to say Mucho.

 

I thought it would mean a lot to you.

[deftona]

1 hour ago, Endor said:

Just dropped by to say Mucho.

 

I thought it would mean a lot to you.

 

I laughed for way too long about this.