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[Athenα] A Woman Who Conquers Herself is Greater


Athena

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4 hours ago, Athena said:

 

Thanks for stopping by! :) And for the feedback. I'm always open to constructive criticism, too.

 

Haha, well, I certainly have no trouble giving constructive criticism, it is a benefit/curse of my personality type (depending on who you ask). But, at the moment, I only have positive feedback.

 

I saw on your profile that you are a '94 baby. So am I! 

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Chaotic-Neutral, Elven Bladesinger (Apprentice)

Current Stats: STR 11 || DEX 11 || CON 11 || INT 15 || WIS 16 || CHA 12

Goal Stats: STR 14 || DEX 17+ || CON 14 || INT 18+ || WIS 18+ || CHA 14

"To dare is to lose one's footing momentarily; to not dare is to lose one's self". - Søren Kierkegaard

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Ugh I just want to read what everyone else is doing & talk about / listen to nerdy things. Can't I become awesome(er) by osmosis?

 

I mean. It's sorta working. :D In a way.

 

Time to finish the Daily Dare and do my mobility training!

 

(The Munchies mostly kept quiet today, which I am very content with.)

 

PS - Why oh why do people like my neighbours seem to rarely have fertility problems? I would not WISH it upon them but... It would provide comfort if they would not procreate.

 

Something happened again that almost makes me wonder what the limits are of thickness... Or stupidity, or whatever the word is... (Almost, because I know: there are none.)

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Level ☆ human [uncategorizable]
STR 2 | DEX 3 | CON 2 | STA 3 | WIS 5 | CHA 5
Current challenge: Athena focuses on the physical | 
Battle log

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3 minutes ago, Athena said:

Ugh I just want to read what everyone else is doing & talk about / listen to nerdy things. Can't I become awesome(er) by osmosis?

 

The say "you are the sum of the people you spend the most time with"....so, you kind of can become more awesome by osmosis.

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Chaotic-Neutral, Elven Bladesinger (Apprentice)

Current Stats: STR 11 || DEX 11 || CON 11 || INT 15 || WIS 16 || CHA 12

Goal Stats: STR 14 || DEX 17+ || CON 14 || INT 18+ || WIS 18+ || CHA 14

"To dare is to lose one's footing momentarily; to not dare is to lose one's self". - Søren Kierkegaard

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I'll be ghosting around, love your challenge title, love your goals.

 

 

Just now, Athena said:

Something happened again that almost makes me wonder what the limits are of thickness... Or stupidity, or whatever the word is... (Almost, because I know: there are none.)

 

I am so feeling you. Hope you can hide if you can't run.

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Legally bound to hug people in need.

 

Living life as a Druid is about walking with the beasts. It's about being scared, looking your fears in the eyes and going on anyway. Dread doesn't go away, you just learn to know it. It's still a beast, it still has fangs, but you walk among it.

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9 hours ago, Athena said:

Can't I become awesome(er) by osmosis?

Whoa whoa whoa! What kinda talk is that?! You are already awesome! If you wanna talk about nerdy things, just talk about them. In case you haven't noticed, I think there might be another nerd somewhere around here.

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Level 25 Final Fantasy Rebel

My Epic Quest | My Journey | Currently on the Trial of Orthos
Str: 60 | Dex: 23 | Sta: 66 | Con: 28 | Wis: 55 | Cha: 14

Goals for 2021:

Spoiler
  • Build my brother a Destiny 2 Lamp
  • Learn how to do a Handstand
  • Play 1 song on the acoustic guitar
  • Clean up the Christmas Decorations and finish setting up my apartment (hang things up, plus some other few things that need to be organized)
  • Re-introduce Pull-ups into my routine
  • Build a shelving unit next to my Desk

"No matter what, if you can hold your head up high, you've done the right thing."

"When you stand with your family, your family stands with you."

"Write what needs to be written."

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On 1/1/2021 at 9:36 PM, Aquarii said:

 

The say "you are the sum of the people you spend the most time with"....so, you kind of can become more awesome by osmosis.

 

Hehe, yes! That's what I meant by "it's sorta working" :) 

What it doesn't do is actually move my limbs to DO THE THINGS, I was just getting those thoughts out of my system before I went and did my daily dare haha :) 

 

 

On 1/2/2021 at 6:36 AM, Red1263 said:

Whoa whoa whoa! What kinda talk is that?! You are already awesome!

:) why thank you! I do plan on getting more awesomerrr AND feeling like I am too. Kind of stagnating here and there these past months.

 

I was spending time around a lot of doers before March, and for a while spending time on here helped but recently I've only having my thoughts to guide me IRL and my personality is more... thinking not doing :D I also have some personal stuff right now that's making it real easy for me to give in to the "it's fine... You are tired, you don't have to sit and work on your thesis topic quest... It doesn't matter that you only barely got a couple of topics down only now at the beginning of december when you've had since August to research... It's all fine... " I'll start trying again around January 8th :) Then I'll feel a bit more like I'm as awesome as I already am, without additional effort, if that makes sense.

 

On 1/2/2021 at 6:36 AM, Red1263 said:

If you wanna talk about nerdy things,

 

Oh I've been doing that, it just does not help me achieve my goals :D I wish it did!

 

On 1/1/2021 at 11:34 PM, Jean said:

I'll be ghosting around, love your challenge title, love your goals.

 

Happy to have you ghosting around.

 

On 1/1/2021 at 11:34 PM, Jean said:

I am so feeling you. Hope you can hide if you can't run.

 

Yeah... Winter has been making that easy. Ish... It just isn't ideal to live around people that are used to handling things either by playing the fragile victim role, or yelling their lungs out, or probably physical aggression.

 

On 1/2/2021 at 9:48 AM, Mad Hatter said:

'Tis the truth.

😊

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Level ☆ human [uncategorizable]
STR 2 | DEX 3 | CON 2 | STA 3 | WIS 5 | CHA 5
Current challenge: Athena focuses on the physical | 
Battle log

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3 minutes ago, Athena said:

Hehe, yes! That's what I meant by "it's sorta working" :) 

What it doesn't do is actually move my limbs to DO THE THINGS, I was just getting those thoughts out of my system before I went and did my daily dare haha :) 

 

True...true. Though there have been some pretty impressive studies on the power of visualization for fitness progress ;) At least that is what I like to tell myself when I think about working out instead of actually working out, lol

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Chaotic-Neutral, Elven Bladesinger (Apprentice)

Current Stats: STR 11 || DEX 11 || CON 11 || INT 15 || WIS 16 || CHA 12

Goal Stats: STR 14 || DEX 17+ || CON 14 || INT 18+ || WIS 18+ || CHA 14

"To dare is to lose one's footing momentarily; to not dare is to lose one's self". - Søren Kierkegaard

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Just now, Athena said:

I was spending time around a lot of doers before March, and for a while spending time on here helped but recently I've only having my thoughts to guide me IRL and my personality is more... thinking not doing :D I also have some personal stuff right now that's making it real easy for me to give in to the "it's fine... You are tired, you don't have to sit and work on your thesis topic quest...

 

What really helps to put me into action mode are the workouts. I'd put a focus on the goal that seems the most easily achievable and make sure I accomplish that without failing. We all have excuses but ultimately, we're the one we're accountable to and excuses won't bring you to the other side of your thesis, nor make you stronger. You know all this already so... time to act?

 

Also, venting. Venting carries me out a lot! 'Gets what is irritating me out of my air.

 

You've got this. Time to conquer!

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Legally bound to hug people in need.

 

Living life as a Druid is about walking with the beasts. It's about being scared, looking your fears in the eyes and going on anyway. Dread doesn't go away, you just learn to know it. It's still a beast, it still has fangs, but you walk among it.

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So, I'll do updates for 2 & 3  &4 January tomorrow evening, but I just wanted to reaffirm here for myself that I'm doing enough, for now. 

 

  • I've tended to some glowing embers. These past months I've been peddling away from a Dark Vortex
    • I've been worried for a lot of people and overthinking the world's problems like I could change anything, instead of sticking to my circle of influence.
  • with absolutely ZERO (external) structure and a little agent of chaos as a sister that is REVELLING in the fact her big sister is home so much.
  • I've been missing my partner like crazy, in all sorts of ways.
  • I've been stretching and testing the cravings protocol during experimental zero week. 
  • New year's leftovers are mostly finished today, but they weren't before this. Everyone was still in holiday eating mode. I'm doing alright.

 

I'm not going to try and build in more anchors. I'm going to build these in first. Warm-up & meditation at the beginning of the day. Stretching or mobility work at the end of the day. Testing the protocol during the day. Making sure my sister gets some play time & some learning time & not too much screen time & drinks enough water and so on.

 

After the 7th of January, when I'm not the prime responsible person for keeping my sister busy, (since my grandparents have not been capable of keeping her busy when they visit and getting her to listen to them, like my great grandparents could with little kids),

 

I'll add in "sign on" and "sign off" work routines again, likely including workouts.  I took this task on, since schools are closed & my mother has some stuff to tend to that are tiring enough without a kid. I haven't had the opportunity to truly help her ever since my sis is in our lives, and this is feeding my spirit. That I'm stepping up to do this, however imperfectly.

 

44 minutes ago, Jean said:

You've got this. Time to conquer!

 

Thanks! I did not manage to find a way to "conquer" last month, and 7th of January is almost here, so I'll just keep on hanging on and spending my energy on my sis for now. Then AFTER, I'll truly conquer :) My academic goals, too.

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Level ☆ human [uncategorizable]
STR 2 | DEX 3 | CON 2 | STA 3 | WIS 5 | CHA 5
Current challenge: Athena focuses on the physical | 
Battle log

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Tired Animation GIF by Lisa Vertudaches

 

I need to do another hand..wrist..thing... And the daily dares have been kicking my butt (along side with some random exercises I threw in today and yesterday). So sore everywhere.

 

... Okay I did these videos and I feel better. i did these  before but I guess I am more impatient and they need more mindful movement and cues. 

 

Hopefully Ican sleep now.

 

Spoiler

 

 

 

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Level ☆ human [uncategorizable]
STR 2 | DEX 3 | CON 2 | STA 3 | WIS 5 | CHA 5
Current challenge: Athena focuses on the physical | 
Battle log

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Sleep was had! Now I'm doing my morning warm-up. I am really grateful for music this morning. It's something I already said during the minichallenge, so I really tried to feel it. I woke up with a light-hearted song stuck in my head (Say so, by Doja Cat)  and I tried telling myself to come on, get up! Your body isn't going to fix itself, you need to do your moving. (I fell back to sleep regardless, but oh well. First step is not starting with the "Ohhh I don't want to get up" talk first thing in the morning.)

 

Spoiler

 

 

 

Spoiler

 

It's a thing for me to keep my setting on: do, and expect to win. I tend to turtle very easily: just chill around and endure when needed. And "when needed" includes my brain attacking me with sad/angry thoughts about all sorts of things.

 

Maybe I need to actively plan in "journalling about Big Deep (depressing) Things" every week, so I get that out of my system. :) 

 

  • My partner says he also thinks about these things but he avoids doing it as often as possible because it gets him down bad. 
  • And I mean, I get it, his mother also regularly brings up heavy topics and vents in a way that transfers to her conversational partner. So if he gets that, AND his own heavy topics on top of it, it would be too much.
  • I have the luxury of not having family members nor close friends that do that to me. We discuss heavy topics, but it's in a way that does not transfer, and I cannot explain exactly how that's done. But my partner confirms I don't get him down when I talk about stuff that's bothering me usually, and other people have done so too. I'm fairly good at keeping shitty spells inside AND venting (I mean, he also says he'd do it for me, listen even if he'd get down, but I trust he is being sincere about NOT getting down most of the time & that he'd tell me when it's becoming too much :D )

 

 

 

In other news... I need to get a keyboard with a cable for when I put my laptop on its stand. The bluetooth keyboard eats too many batteries. 

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  • That's Metal 1

Level ☆ human [uncategorizable]
STR 2 | DEX 3 | CON 2 | STA 3 | WIS 5 | CHA 5
Current challenge: Athena focuses on the physical | 
Battle log

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So, is this (spoiler) really part of having ADHD or just a person that kept their inner kid :)

 

Otherwise, the evidence pile keeps stacking up...

 

I can get SO Excited about little things like... Fireworks, or. OH! Good smoke rings. Which is awesome because I truly can notice the "little things" in life easily, that is when I'm not really really really close to the vortex.

 

Spoiler

 

Also fun comment (I do the shout-kissing as well):

 

"ok, so shout-kissing your boyfriend out of nowhere with sparkles in your eyes is normal with ADHD? I somehow feel less special now LMAO 😂"

 

 

I also wanted to remark that i see a pattern here: the longer I speak meta about the way I interract with others/ my personality and so on,

 

the more I get all weird and feeling socially incapable when I switch back to regular interactions :D Just like stage fright. As if I feel like all spotlights are on me and I suddently cannot perform :D So I feel a bit disembodied(?) on the Discord and everything. Weird brain. Chill. Will be back to normal soon.

 

Fortunately, a dear friend apped me and told me she volunteers as being a dietery coach for me. So I can have some reg interaction that is not with  person I jave discussed social stuff with on the meta level :)

 

She has been talking with a dietician because of a genetic issue that is affected by what she eats so she is likely on the wavelength I need rn :) Finding out what works best for ones body.

 

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Level ☆ human [uncategorizable]
STR 2 | DEX 3 | CON 2 | STA 3 | WIS 5 | CHA 5
Current challenge: Athena focuses on the physical | 
Battle log

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3 hours ago, Athena said:

Weird brain. Chill.

 

If this isn't a MOOD I dunno what is.

 

*also sneaks in hellooooo hi~!!* ❤️ 

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i am not waiting for a hero.  i saved myself long ago.

Level 50 Bardic Time-Mage; of the Furious Heart

STR.55  DEX.43 STA.48 CON.51 WIS.53 CHA.65

"Well...in the end, it boils down to two simple choices. Either you do or you don't.

You'd think with all the problems in this world, there'd be more answers. It's not fair...
...But that's the way things are. The choice is yours."

»  kom starkru

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On 12/28/2020 at 10:02 AM, Athena said:

Friday

 

Cravings reflection: ON HOLD 

 

Does the protocol work? 

 

Did I stretch/mobility train? No... I had laid out the yoga mat and everything but I procrastinated for an hour and then it was bed time.

 

Nutrition reflection question:


Daily Dare? Yes!

 

Saturday 

Cravings reflection: I had 4 chocolates before I decided it was time to drink my glass of milk for the day with milka capuccino.

 

Does the protocol work? Yes, when I initiated it.

 

Did I stretch/mobility train? Yes, everything hurt though :D 

 

End-of-the-week nutrition reflection: x

 

Nutrition reflection question: x


Daily Dare? No. 

 

Notes: I also set my light alarm for 7 AM so I have SOME form of "sunrise", should I want to wake up around that time...

 

So, the voice recording tracking kind of works :) It's easier to voice record in between stuff and to edit my post in one go than to do the editing in between. That's good to know. 

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Level ☆ human [uncategorizable]
STR 2 | DEX 3 | CON 2 | STA 3 | WIS 5 | CHA 5
Current challenge: Athena focuses on the physical | 
Battle log

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Week 1

 

Sunday

Cravings reflection: I had no cravings of my own today. :) Got offered a lot of snacks during family time and ate them, but no cravings along side them. Which is good. I might have to learn how to say 'no' more often if this starts happening more often / if I get colleagues that keep bringing tasty things too often.

 

Does the protocol work?

 

Did I stretch/mobility train? Yes, shoulder stretches!

I have a lot of "tendon ache from the stretches" all over my body and general tension in my neck and shoulders but we continue marching on :D

 (EDIT: This was kind of helped with the videos I posted earlier.)

 

Nutrition reflection question: What will I have for breakfast? What iron rich & calcium rich thing am I going to eat tomorrow?

I prepared approx. 70 grams of walnuts for myself :D 


Daily Dare? No. I did walk a lot today :) 

 

Monday

 

Cravings reflection:

  • I had cookies with chocolate milk for breakfast which I don't really count but I wanted to mention it because. Well, theoretically I would want healthier breakfasts. I just feel uninspired to breakfast with anything "less" than this. But I will nonetheless allow myself to have chocolatey breakfasts in the winter, I think. As long as I still have energy/don't get snacky from them. Growing up is difficult enough.
  • A glass of "kids' champagne" (sparky apple juice)  was had, which I thought was alright.
  • A slice of "abby" cheese. This and the juice I just grabbed out of... Not really cravings but "simply" wanting to nom on something. I could have gone for mindful tea instead. But they are not the cravings I really want to tackle, they're easy to ignore, but still. I am observing my thoughts and... These are thoughts? :D 
  • Around 3 PM I grabbed two thin vanilla waffers & a chocolate bonbon (that were in a bowl on the table AGAIN, I keep saying there shouldn't be bowls on the table when there are no guests, dammit) before I realised I could have initiated the protocol instead. .. 
    • I had a glass of water AND a cup of tea. After I did this, I had barely any cravings for the rest of the day... 
  • Except for around 10:30 PM - as I sat behind the laptop to write this - and I easily grabbed a couple of walnuts and some water instead of anything else that was on my mind...

Does the protocol work? It seems to be very effective, I look forward to seeing what happens when I start it up earlier in the day...

 

Did I stretch/mobility train? Straight leg stretch & Butterfly. The straight leg feels a bit like cheating because my butt gives the leg that stays down quite a bit of support but oh well.

 

Nutrition reflection question: Breakfast will probably be something "fun" again, but I'll see if I can tempt myself with something more nutritious AND fun like yoghurt and frozen fruit AND hot chocolate...

I'll keep on going with the walnuts... 

I've become very curious about the sardines all day so I think I'll try those for lunch, along with some... Sort of "Grilled" paprika & cherry tomatoes and corn, if there's some left? 


Daily Dare?  Yes,  and caught up.

 

Tuesday
 
Cravings reflection: Yoghurt-blueberry-cinnamon breakfast, so not the usual cookies or so I’ve been having still got me this day:
a full bowl with chips around 11. It was sitting on the counter for 2 days and it was annoying me. Bad reason to eat junk but oh well.
3:30, after quite a big lunch and a glass of milk, I still HAD to try the new oreo ice cream. I always have to try new sweet things, Idk. Then I decided to initiate the protocol to prevent me from snacking more.
Worked, as in… I then ate two donuts for DINNER. (I would usually have eaten dinner anyway. Only a couple of walnuts.) 
I noticed my face is getting clearer, though I’m not sure if my back and shoulders are fairing better than before. 🙂
 
Does the protocol work? Sort of. Yes.
 
Did I stretch/mobility train? No. Little sleep the night before, went to bed early.
 
Nutrition reflection question: x
 
Daily Dare? Yes.

 

 
Wednesday
 
Cravings reflection: After breakfast: a croissant. After lunch a chocolate bonbon.
Around 2 pm I had a craving for chocolate when I saw someone else snacking but I turned around and got 1/4th of a slice of abby cheese and a slice of sausage. And a banana. And a Milka cappuccino. And walnuts. AND then I drank water… At least I got other snacks than my ultimate achilles’ heel; chocolate. Then I was calm.
I ate banana mindfully which sounds wrong, but my point is that a few years that I was like meh bananas. While it’s a real good fruit. I need to learn to enjoy it like I used to. Okay okay I’ll stop talking about learning to like bananas again now.
After dinner I had cravings but I didn’t give into them. That was cool.
 
Does the protocol work? Yes.
 
Did I stretch/mobility train?
  • Mobility training, check. I overexterted when trying to do the bridge well though… Other than that it felt good. 
    • Oh, when I turn my joints it’s like my muscles are skipping, unpleasant. Not painful. Gives me a weird feeling though, and it felt like the skipping as a liiiittle less than last time so that’s good.
  • Other positive development. Something I always had in the past was when I put my foot up to stretch my leg, I felt a pinch in my ankles. That was really SHARP PAIN. Nowadays, with my right foot I pretty much don’t feel anything. My left foot I do but it’s bearable. I’m REALLY HAPPY WITH THIS PROGRESS.
  • I kind of feel self-conscious about how inflexible I am, maybe below average around my hips. I never really lost my ability to touch my toes but my hips though. Maybe I should sit weirdly on chairs like some of my friends do haha. 
  • When I started out with lotus stretches, I felt like I Wasn’t doing anything but nowadays, since I started my overall-flexibility-journey and with the flex support group explanations, it feels really good to actually feel progress!
 
Nutrition reflection question: Tomorrow: sardines for calcium? good portion walnuts for iron? No red meat in the fridge or so...
 
Daily Dare? No.
 
Note: I am being really good about tracking yay.

 

 
Thursday
 
Cravings reflection: 
  • Had a real big breakfast, which felt like cravings rather than feeding myself but it does not feel like it when it’s just during the meal? I will work on portions more next challenge / when I feel like I have being mindful about my cravings internalised.
  •  I did not have a craving really when I ate an ice cream… I thought, why? I am not snacky, I am not hungry, why? And I figured out that “i did not want to miss out”. Since starting Monday I am going to show solidarity with my mom and do her fave diet (low carb, protein focused) with her…. But I breathed and sat with my FOMO and ate some walnuts. But then later on the day I still had one. Hmmm… I wish I did not think like this,FOMO and all that but it was it is for now.
  • Sis came to me with another ice cream later on the day and I got it without thinking too much about it. 
 
Does the protocol work? Hmmm, yes. Also just keeping this journal, too. I think.
 
Did I stretch/mobility train? YES! Stretches.
  • Today I wanted to complain so much about how “I don’t want to work on my mobility and sstretching waahwahh” and wrote it out and then deleted it, and then I did my morning warmup anyway and then I Felt better. AM happy about that.
 
Nutrition reflection:

 

  • Had my glass of milk.
 
Daily Dare? Yes.

 

 
Friday
 
Cravings reflection:
  •  Ate a chocolate waffer & jelly candy after being handed them by my sis.
  • One chocolate waffer on my own.
  • Around 10 pm I ate vegan ice cream + 2-3 chocolate bonbons. Part mindless snacking when I got it to watch during series, part FOMO again.
 
Does the protocol work?
Did not really initiate it today.
  
Did I stretch/mobility train?
  • ON HOLD. My hand+arm really needs some rest. Almost all stretched either require me to support myself or hold something with my hands so... I put an ice pack on it during Cobra Kai.  
  • I danced, though.
 
Nutrition reflection:

 

  • Ate my sardines finally today! (175g)
  • Walnuts.
 
Daily Dare? No. 

 

 
Saturday 
Cravings reflection:
  •  Two ice creams after lunch with my sis. 
  • Finished my cake I did not eat for breakfast with some tea and a fizzy drink…
 
Does the protocol work? Did not initiate it.
 
Did I stretch/mobility train? ON HOLD. (Although arm feels better today but it’s good to give it some more rest I think.) Mini dance parties were had though!)
 
Nutrition reflection question: x
 
Daily Dare? No. Break! (Although the scorpion twists don't really put strain on my wrists like those holds would have but. I used it as an excuse lol)
 
 
End-of-the-week nutrition reflection:
  • Stretching and mobility training went well and kept at it besides when I gave myself some rest. Must take care of my arm though. And put in more effort to still do SOME stretching /a daily dare from a different date when I am giving my wrist a rest… Maybe make a list with all the stretches that don’t require me to support myself, like the ragdoll & (star) toe touches and… Trunk rotation and related ones… Aww I could have done all the trunk rotation ones just fine. Oh well 🙂 Those are up for tonight (sunday), anyway!
    • I also need to start doing my ankle physio again… As a part of my morning warmup maybe. My feet feel good but… Maintenance is important...
    • I won’t add shoulder and wrist-targeted mobility yet… Still working out actually making the time for these things… Though it’s slowly starting to feel wrong not to do stretching or so as part of my evening winding down, so soon.
  • Had fish once a week. Boom!
  • Thought about calcium and iron. Did not always hit the goal. Thinking of iron things other than walnuts was really annoying. 
  • I kept forgetting to do the nutrition planning for the next of the day because I did not feel like I had any easy options besides milk, sardines and walnuts… Need to review those lists in my first post. And the tips given by you, awesome Nerds 🙂 
  • I did not feel tired this week like last week, so no bread + salt or ayran protocal was needed. I think? Or did I ignore some signals? Hmmm.. Not sure. Some days I just really had not slept well, like the night between Friday and Saturday.
  • I don’t know if I’m going to track how many days / the week I got an iron and calcium snack though. The cravings reflections are doing me a lot of good but they take time to write out. So I need to focus on them rather than having another box to check, I think. 
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Level ☆ human [uncategorizable]
STR 2 | DEX 3 | CON 2 | STA 3 | WIS 5 | CHA 5
Current challenge: Athena focuses on the physical | 
Battle log

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Looks like it's a good time to focus on doing and let the thinking sit in the background. Great discoveries are made that way. :D

 

Keep up the good work, Spring is coming.

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Legally bound to hug people in need.

 

Living life as a Druid is about walking with the beasts. It's about being scared, looking your fears in the eyes and going on anyway. Dread doesn't go away, you just learn to know it. It's still a beast, it still has fangs, but you walk among it.

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My brain rebelled! "Only a couple of bad snack choices? You shall then find it totally acceptable to go from one bad idea to do before bed to another one until you find one that sticks!" It is 3:45 AM now even though I was in bed by 00:30AM. and was only going to read.

 

Or.... My body is not used to nut power and not as many sugar crashes and is now running on ALL CILINDERS. I choose to believe the latter.

 

Anyway. I need to find joy in planning for success again. 

 

Today, after I sleep, I will start out the morning with meditation,

 

open my eyes while the camera pans & zooms into their determined gaze,

 

AND... collect some underpants. I want to:

*read an article om effective goal setting

*watch a few Ana Mascara videos on how to train my puppy mind to do thesis work after a long pause

 

200.gif

 

*write a draft email to the financial department about my tution fee if I don't have my thesis done when I finish my other master's

*figure out which dpt & where I left off this tasks string when I got lost in an Awesome Thesis Writing Rush (for the one that I have turned in already)

*Email the education desk about my module sign up for march-april

*Make a plan for next 2 weeks, including prepping for association meeting, linked in workshop and first DnD sesh in ages

 

PS - I am really excited I can touch my right foot's big toe to my nose again. Woohoo!

  • Like 6

Level ☆ human [uncategorizable]
STR 2 | DEX 3 | CON 2 | STA 3 | WIS 5 | CHA 5
Current challenge: Athena focuses on the physical | 
Battle log

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3 hours ago, Athena said:

*watch a few Ana Mascara videos on how to train my puppy mind to do thesis work after a long pause

 

 

I misread this and thought that 1. you have a new puppy and 2. it can write law

  • Haha 4

Let cheese and bread and mead crowd out our secret desires for power and domination.

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*I forgot to say I slept  with my weighted blanket. This made my watch thing I was already asleep at 1:30 am haha

 

* I woke up time no.1 8:22 with an alarm, snoozed it and was back on my BS with the talk although I switched it around. Went back to sleep. Woken up at 8:45 by alarm again & I had a big mental wrestle with myself but guess who won? Haha! I did! (The part that wanted to get up so we can start the day at an okayish time and do stuff and start decompressing at around 20:00 when I do my stretches. I can watch an ep or two or something then but that is all.)

 

Discipline muscle EXERCISED. Now to get on with my day...

  • Like 4
  • That's Metal 2

Level ☆ human [uncategorizable]
STR 2 | DEX 3 | CON 2 | STA 3 | WIS 5 | CHA 5
Current challenge: Athena focuses on the physical | 
Battle log

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18 hours ago, Athena said:

I need to find joy in planning for success again. 

 

Needing doesn't work for me, I have to actually want it. Turning around the pot doing meaningful things that build back my enjoyment of life and the world usually works. Sniff all the things!

 

18 hours ago, Athena said:

PS - I am really excited I can touch my right foot's big toe to my nose again. Woohoo!

 

And this, is awesome!

  • Thanks 1

Legally bound to hug people in need.

 

Living life as a Druid is about walking with the beasts. It's about being scared, looking your fears in the eyes and going on anyway. Dread doesn't go away, you just learn to know it. It's still a beast, it still has fangs, but you walk among it.

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On 1/3/2021 at 1:07 PM, Athena said:

:) why thank you! I do plan on getting more awesomerrr AND feeling like I am too. Kind of stagnating here and there these past months.

Well I mean, we are in the middle of a Deadly Pandemic, so some stagnation is bound to happen. Don't judge yourself so harshly, ok?

  • Like 1
  • Thanks 1

Level 25 Final Fantasy Rebel

My Epic Quest | My Journey | Currently on the Trial of Orthos
Str: 60 | Dex: 23 | Sta: 66 | Con: 28 | Wis: 55 | Cha: 14

Goals for 2021:

Spoiler
  • Build my brother a Destiny 2 Lamp
  • Learn how to do a Handstand
  • Play 1 song on the acoustic guitar
  • Clean up the Christmas Decorations and finish setting up my apartment (hang things up, plus some other few things that need to be organized)
  • Re-introduce Pull-ups into my routine
  • Build a shelving unit next to my Desk

"No matter what, if you can hold your head up high, you've done the right thing."

"When you stand with your family, your family stands with you."

"Write what needs to be written."

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On 12/28/2020 at 3:28 AM, Athena said:

During the last challenge, I spent each day rekindling the fire within. It was no easy feat, but I was not alone. The embers started glowing, and I never stopped nurturing them. The Nothing and its henchmen will not get me so easily!

I love this and how you've structured your challenge around awareness and reflection. Such a great way to kick off the new year!

 

You are not alone.

🦋

  • Thanks 1

&,
Amazon of the Way

Gypsy Druid Paladin

Ranger Year 1: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 

Druid Year 2: 8 | 9 | 1011  | 12 | 13 |Year 3: 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 |Year 4: 1920 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 |Year 5: 29 | 30 | 31 | 32 | 33 | 34 | 35 | 36 | 37 | 38 |Year 6: 39 | 40 | 41 | 42 | 43 | 44 | 45 | 46 |Year 7: 47 | 48 | 49 | 50 | 51 | 52 | 53| 54 | 55 | 56 | 57 | 58 | 59 | 60 |Year 8: 61 | 62 | 63 | 64 | 65 | 66 |

Local Foods Guru | Financial Freedom Fighter | Minimalism Yoda | Smaug-Slayer
Heidi Chronicles My NF Character Sheet | @theheidifeed | Amazon of Awesome | MySlashdotKarmaIsExcellent

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On 1/5/2021 at 2:59 AM, Athena said:

I had a big mental wrestle with myself but guess who won? Haha! I did!

This is the core of success! Good for you.

Be gentle with yourself as you continue on.

❣️

  • Like 1

&,
Amazon of the Way

Gypsy Druid Paladin

Ranger Year 1: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 

Druid Year 2: 8 | 9 | 1011  | 12 | 13 |Year 3: 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 |Year 4: 1920 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 |Year 5: 29 | 30 | 31 | 32 | 33 | 34 | 35 | 36 | 37 | 38 |Year 6: 39 | 40 | 41 | 42 | 43 | 44 | 45 | 46 |Year 7: 47 | 48 | 49 | 50 | 51 | 52 | 53| 54 | 55 | 56 | 57 | 58 | 59 | 60 |Year 8: 61 | 62 | 63 | 64 | 65 | 66 |

Local Foods Guru | Financial Freedom Fighter | Minimalism Yoda | Smaug-Slayer
Heidi Chronicles My NF Character Sheet | @theheidifeed | Amazon of Awesome | MySlashdotKarmaIsExcellent

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