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Bean Sidhe Vs Chaos - No energy for a title


Bean Sidhe

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My backstory – married Mom to 2 human Agents of Chaos (Children (almost 13 and 17)), 3 Furry Cat agents ( Agent Black 3,  Agent White 2 yo and Agent Twilight 1year old), 1 Dog Agent K9 (5) and might as well be mine Dog Agent Yappy (He’s been here since September, my mom can’t care for him 11 yo).  My Dad died last year and my mom is not functioning. So the world here isn’t great. But part of me wonders if anywhere in the world is great now.

I am trying to get back to a place where I am not always angry, but I also need to allow myself to be miserable and depressed. I have had depression since I was 16 and anxiety forever. I know this and while I am not handling as well as I would like, I am not sure I can handle much more of the “Here is how to fix it” because I know I am in a rough spot with no one besides my Agents and Hubby to help. They are all pitching in plenty, but they can’t help on everything.

So please understand, I appreciate the ideas and that people want to help, but sometimes people are just stuck in a bad spot, and telling me to get angry at the people around me for not helping, not being involved, not wanting to deal doesn’t help when I am already there or I am giving up on any positive solutions.

This challenge is all about just getting control where I can. The things listed here don’t all have to be done, but I do better when all of them are done. Each box is to get me away from a path I don’t want (weight /moving/eating) or to live close to how I want (Fight the chaos by organizing or cleaning) or to be the person I want to be (Life and family).

Instead of pushing myself to something that isn’t possible like doing them all, I am going to go for do a bit more than I did last challenge. Long and short of it, I need to do X amount of each category. If I get 27 pts I need out of 103 possible it is a good day. And right now, I need some good days. This challenge started this morning, I just haven’t had a chance to get this up.
 

Goal

Value

Description

Strength

1

Calf raises

 

1

Squats

15

1

Wall Sit (sec)

 

1

Side kicks

Do 3

1

Leg lifts

3

1

 Reverse sit ups

 

1

sit ups

 

1

Knee to Elbows

 

1

raised Arm circles

 

1

Bicep extenstions

 

1

Table plank

 

1

Backward Leg Raises

 

1

Step ups

 

1

Side lunges

 

1

Desk push ups

Flexibility

1

Wrist Extension Stretch

 

1

Wrist Flexion Stretch

18

1

Upward dog/Child pose

 

1

Meditating Groot

 

1

Lord of the dance Yoga (ankle above head)

 

1

Lower back stretch (One leg across body)

 

1

Chair Pose

 

1

Butterfly

 

1

Bridge

 

1

Calf stretch

Do 3

1

Ballet/toe Touch

                                                3.00

1

Sitting Fix/Shoulder stretch

 

1

Warrior 1

 

1

Ankle Circles

 

1

Warrior 3 (Eagle bird thing)

 

1

Quad stretch

 

1

Side stretch

 

1

Forward bend

Life and Family

1

1 thing for mom a day

 

1

NF status update

 

1

NF reply one other thread

 

1

Check Yappy Dog's night water bowl

 

1

Brush Yappy dog

 

1

Put lotion on legs

 

1

Take Calcium in AM

24

1

Spend time with Agents

 

1

Nightly Downtime

 

1

Text/Talk to one family member a day (Chosen or Blood)

 

1

Water an inside plant

 

1

Read a book

 

1

Soak up the sun

 

1

Plan

 

1

Be in bed by 11:00

 

1

Floss in morning

 

1

Floss after work

Do 6

1

Floss before bed

 

1

Walk across beam once a day

 

1

Put christmas away

 

1

Check Dad's email

6

1

One good thing

 

1

Give Agent K9 5 minutes playtime

 

1

Play with Cats

Fight Chaos

1

Pennisula/Island

Clean all these daily

1

Table / Half wall

12

1

Desk

 

1

Bathroom up

 

1

Clean off file cabinet

Do 3

1

Bathroom down

3

1

Clean off door to basement

 

1

Clean off Stairs and landing

 

1

Clean off tall dresser

 

1

Clean off nightstands

 

1

Clean off Dresser

 

1

Counter over dishwasher

At least 5 minutes per room (at least one)

1

Garage

 

1

Dust one surface

 

1

Computer room

12

1

Basement

 

1

Random organizing project

Do 3

1

Pick up one furtumbleweed a day

 

1

Deal with mail sorter on my desk

 

1

Clean up plants

 

1

Bathroom down

3

1

Clean 2 papers out of paper organizer

 

1

File 1 thing a day

 

1

Purge 1 thing a day

Walking

1

Walk 9000 steps

7

1

Walk 15 minutes a day

 

1

Walk 5 minutes at lunch

 

1

Walk  5 minutes in morning

do 3

1

Take Agent K9 for a walk

3

1

7 hours with 250 steps

 

1

Walk to Mordor

Fuel

1

No eating after dinner

15

1

No stupid sugar

 

1

Track breakfast

 

1

Track Second breakfast

do 6

1

Track Elevensies

 

1

Track lunch

 

1

Track Dinner

 

1

Track Supper

 

1

Take Probiotic

6

1

< 3 bottles of tea

 

1

Eat Dates Daily

 

1

Eat dried Apricots

 

1

Eat Breakfast

 

1

Eat Lunch

 

1

60 oz of water

 

103

Did I complete 5 minutes in room

Total points for day

           27.00

 

 

  • Like 9

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

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here to cheer for Bean!

  • Like 2

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1 hour ago, Tateman said:

Here is hoping for more good days for you this challenge. 

Thanks, At this point, one good day here or there would be nice. Getting the boxes is my first step to hopefully something less crappy.

  • Like 1

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

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I am here.  I didn't think I had been gone that long, but life.

Challenge wise, I have been doing fairly well. Monday I had 70 pts, but Tuesday my monthly migraine started and I only got 40 pts. Today I am struggling hard and haven't even filled in the boxes yet.

Non challenge wise, there has been a ton of drama from my mom. Short version, some important papers went missing, and I think she shredded them thinking they were junk. Now I am the evil child since shes "too old and dumb to go through the mail anymore" and I am supposed to do "Whatever I think is best" which is not the actual answer. That is her "You are being dumb, I don't want to deal. I hate what you are saying, but I don't want to deal with it so i am being passive aggressive about it."

Going to go and try and do boxes, My brain wants sleep. I just want it to stop hurting. I have a feeling it won't for a few more days. Right now, I just want a real day off on my break since I went from having 3 to maybe 1.

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  • Sad 4

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

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I am sorry to hear that today was a struggle. I am here to encourage you and remind you how incredible you are and that this, too, shall pass.

 

Let me know if I can be of service in any way.

  • Like 3

Who am I? -- My NF Character

Current Challenge: WolfDreamer Embraces His Wild Poet

Past Challenges: 

Spoiler

Winter is ComingWolfen Strengthens His Heart, Body, Mind, and Spirit, Wolfen Becomes One of the PeopleWolfen Strengthens His ChakrasWolfen Welcomes Summer and Gets Primal, Soulcon and Spartan, Wolfen Develops Mental ToughnessWolfen Joins the Wander SocietySoulcon, Spartan, School, and Stranger ThingsWolfen Becomes a Warrior EliteWolfen Goes Here and There and Back AgainWolfen Becomes a Soulcon Warrior EliteWolfen Returns to His RootsWolfen Wanders in Soul, Spirit, and BodyWolfen Owns the DayWolfen Searches for His Wild Heart, Wolfen Runs for His LifeWolfen Hits the TrailsWolfen Becomes an Explorer and Joins the ResistanceWolfen Goes Back to the SourceWolfen Begins the Hero's JourneyWolfDreamer Returns to the People,  WolfDreamer Pushes BackWolfDreamer PrioritizesBurpees, Books, and BrainworkBurpees, Books, Brainwork, and BodyworkWolfDreamer Masters the Four ElementsWolfDreamer Continues to Master the Four ElementsWolfDreamer Returns to SpartaWolfDreamer Returns to Middle EarthWolfDreamer Continues His Middle Earth AdventureWolfDreamer and the FallWolfDreamer Forges His Own PathWolfDreamer Has HopeWolfDreamer Returns to Middle EarthWolfDreamer Reads Harder, Breathes Harder, and Journals More

I'd rather sing one wild song and burst my heart with it, than live a thousand years watching my digestion and being afraid of the wet.” -- Jack London

“I wanted movement and not a calm course of existence. I wanted excitement and danger and the chance to sacrifice myself for my love.” -- Leo Tolstoy

"I feel love rising in my chest again
Rising like a burning sun into the day..." -- Gungor, "Hurricane"

"...wherever the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom." 2 Corinthians 3:17b

 

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1 minute ago, WolfDreamer said:

I am sorry to hear that today was a struggle. I am here to encourage you and remind you how incredible you are and that this, too, shall pass.

 

Thank you. lately, everything has been a struggle and I know the cause, I just can't find a solution that I can live with or not fear the repercussions. I am hoping less for this to pass since the biggest issues are not going anywhere, but THANK YOU so much for the support and being uplifting. I hear good things about me from Hubby, but not many people I deal with day to day seem to think so. so hearing someone encourage me is a huge help.

 

1 minute ago, WolfDreamer said:

Let me know if I can be of service in any way.

I will, thank you. Right now, I just have to get through this until something changes, which I sadly don't see happening for a bit.

  • Like 3

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

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Yesterday, even with a migraine, I did pretty well.  I manged to get 68 pts out of my challenge. I have actually  been remembering to record at least some food. It is also weigh in day and while I am up (Christmas, cookies in the house, ect) I am not up as much as I was afraid. Hopefully the constant walking will help, but who knows.  I am still dealing with some Troll issues when waling when its getting late or early in the mornings because "I will get hurt and am not being safe or smart". I know this is Mom being jealous since she says she uses the treadmill for 3 minutes at  time,  and I am walking 15-35 minutes at a time, but I hate that it upsets me so much. I did buy a new hat today so the "Hat with a flashlight in it so I don't fall" has been given to the Hubby and Eldest Agent for camping.  I am still annoyed, but dealing.
 

Tuesday night I didn't sleep with nerves about talking to mom about the paperwork. Last night I slept better, but I still woke up with a migraine. This sucks. I also got a text from my brother that they are coming up for Christmas Sunday. Which is only made worse since I have to spend Sat cleaning Mom's house for them AND doing my normal Sat stuff, then spend all day Sunday babysitting mom for them.  Tomorrow is supposed to be at MIL for Christmas, but I just got an Ice storm warning so we will see if we go or not.
 

Oh, I 3D printed myself something off Youngest Agent's Christmas present. A Kodama from Princess Mononoke. I adore this guy, too bad the one I made doesn't move his head. Now to make enough to cover the house plants in. Youngest Agent wasn't home to authorized it, but I did text her to say I was doing it.

main-qimg-525ed2c8bc94f8b987ff8cc01386f5

 

  • Like 4

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

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2 minutes ago, Bean Sidhe said:

Oh, I 3D printed myself something off Youngest Agent's Christmas present. A Kodama from Princess Mononoke. I adore this guy, too bad the one I made doesn't move his head. Now to make enough to cover the house plants in.

 

*gasp* I love every bit of this.

 

hayao miyazaki GIF by Maudit

  • Like 2

I felt like I could run forever, like I could smell the wind and feel the grass under my feet, and just run forever.

Current Challenge: #24 - Mrs. Cosmopolite Challenge

Past: #1, #2, #3, #4, #5, #6,  #7#8, #9#10, #11a & #11b, #12, #13, #14, #15, #16, #17, #18, #19, #20, #21, #22, #23

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1 minute ago, sarakingdom said:

 

*gasp* I love every bit of this.

 

hayao miyazaki GIF by Maudit

 

I will have to look into more already made 3D models for these guys and see if I can figure out how to make one with its head move. I love their head shake.

  • Like 1

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

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Just now, Bean Sidhe said:

I will have to look into more already made 3D models for these guys and see if I can figure out how to make one with its head move. I love their head shake.

 

I'd bet there's a way to do it with a spring that fits over a little post on the body and a little post inside a semi-hollow head. Sort of bobble-head style. You'd have to flick it, but I think you'd get just about that oscillating motion they do, and the spring could be pretty hidden. The full 360 spin, that's beyond me.

  • Like 2

I felt like I could run forever, like I could smell the wind and feel the grass under my feet, and just run forever.

Current Challenge: #24 - Mrs. Cosmopolite Challenge

Past: #1, #2, #3, #4, #5, #6,  #7#8, #9#10, #11a & #11b, #12, #13, #14, #15, #16, #17, #18, #19, #20, #21, #22, #23

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Just now, sarakingdom said:

 

I'd bet there's a way to do it with a spring that fits over a little post on the body and a little post inside a semi-hollow head. Sort of bobble-head style. You'd have to flick it, but I think you'd get just about that oscillating motion they do, and the spring could be pretty hidden. The full 360 spin, that's beyond me.

 

Probably, The printer is about 3 days old, so all of this is a bit further ahead than we are. At this point we have made a companion cube from Portal, a jumino pot from Stardew Valley, a unicorn statue and my new little friend. We haven't tried anything with multiple pieces or that wasn't fully created by someone else and we just loaded to the printer.

  • Like 3

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

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4 minutes ago, Bean Sidhe said:

Probably, The printer is about 3 days old, so all of this is a bit further ahead than we are. At this point we have made a companion cube from Portal, a jumino pot from Stardew Valley, a unicorn statue and my new little friend. We haven't tried anything with multiple pieces or that wasn't fully created by someone else and we just loaded to the printer.

 

You're ahead of me. I've got a brand new one for Christmas, too, but it's still in the box. You've got me looking forward to it.

 

Somebody has to have done it. It's too adorable not to.

  • Like 3

I felt like I could run forever, like I could smell the wind and feel the grass under my feet, and just run forever.

Current Challenge: #24 - Mrs. Cosmopolite Challenge

Past: #1, #2, #3, #4, #5, #6,  #7#8, #9#10, #11a & #11b, #12, #13, #14, #15, #16, #17, #18, #19, #20, #21, #22, #23

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Yes, Bean, you are so strong for dealing with this daily and still taking care of those around you. And yourself. 

 

Also love the Kodama! And 3D printed figurines. It's been so long since I (re)watched Princess Mononoke though.

 

I am a monk for DnD and I chose this monk standing on one leg. It had to be reprinted because the ankle was too weak and broke :) The friend cut off less of the excess to keep my little figurine up.

  • Like 2

Level ☆ human [uncategorizable]
STR 2 | DEX 3 | CON 2 | STA 3 | WIS 5 | CHA 5
Current challenge: Athena focuses on the physical | 
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So I didn't pop in yesterday because I was drained. We got hit by the ice storm on Friday and starting on Thursday morning my mom started freaking out about the weather and wanting all of us to hide from it. Well Friday was supposed to be Christmas at MIL.  We woke up Friday Morning and did a "Yeah, no, its not bad now, but its going to get worse over the day." AND MOM STILL HARPED ON the whole we are all going to die all day. I know she has anxiety, even if she won't admit it, but it was draining. The ice stopped about 6 pm, and at 8 when my mom said she was going to bed, she said she would see me Sunday for my brother. I said what about groceries like we do EVERY Saturday morning.  She was all upset that it was snowy and icy and the roads would be bad. I asked if she wanted me to do it Sunday. "No Sunday the weather will be snowy too" I told her I would be safe and the roads would be fine, but she seems to think that even walking out to get the mail will get is all killed.

Its Sat morning and the roads are fine. I already got a text blowing me off for the day about "have a good day" (there is a ton to this that is dismissive) I need to get her groceries and clean for my brother's visit (assuming he comes since he has already called off once). I have other things to do Sunday before my brother gets here, and I have other stuff to do today. I am drained because she has been harping for 3 days about the snow, and now I get 3 days more and her complaints about not having any food.

 

Before anyone asks, yes, she has been draining for years and weather has been an issue, but in the last 6 months now rain is an issue. I do wonder about possible cognitive issues, but I can't convince her to get tested because is I even bring it up, it will be much worse for me. Same if I bring up therapy. My dad said maybe she should talk to someone after my grandma died about 5 years before he died and she would make angry comments at him for even suggesting it till he died.

 

Now to suck it up and text her and figure out if I need to go today or tomorrow. And I doubt I go to just the grocery store since she hasn't been out of her house except here for Christmas and Thanksgiving. She was complaining she had to go to 1 or 2other stores on Wednesday, but she wasn't ready to go out.

  • Like 3

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

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On 12/31/2020 at 8:37 PM, sarakingdom said:

 

You're ahead of me. I've got a brand new one for Christmas, too, but it's still in the box. You've got me looking forward to it.

 

Somebody has to have done it. It's too adorable not to.

So I did some looking and there are Kodama that have shaking heads. I want to print one but I need to figure out how to get the spring they used. They just said "Spring x" which does not return the same results via Amazon or Google.

  • Like 2

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

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On 1/1/2021 at 3:21 AM, Athena said:

Yes, Bean, you are so strong for dealing with this daily and still taking care of those around you. And yourself. 

 

Thanks, I don't feel strong about any of this. I feel like I am falling apart and always mad and I don't like either, but someone has to do this stuff, so I am trying.

 

On 1/1/2021 at 3:21 AM, Athena said:

Also love the Kodama! And 3D printed figurines. It's been so long since I (re)watched Princess Mononoke though.

 

I need to rewatch it again. Youngest Agent has been watching Fairy Tail and I haven't really had a chance to sit down. I painted my guy's white eyes black and he is sitting under my monitor. He is so cute.  (we only have a 1 color printer).

 

 

On 1/1/2021 at 3:21 AM, Athena said:

I am a monk for DnD and I chose this monk standing on one leg. It had to be reprinted because the ankle was too weak and broke :) The friend cut off less of the excess to keep my little figurine up.

Yeah, my little guy almost lost his leg. Hes sitting with his knees bent, and when the supports were removed, his knee actually bent. Some superglue fixed it so he is good to go and you can't even really tell but its there.

  • Like 1

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

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38 minutes ago, Bean Sidhe said:

Yeah, my little guy almost lost his leg. Hes sitting with his knees bent, and when the supports were removed, his knee actually bent. Some superglue fixed it so he is good to go and you can't even really tell but its there.

 

Cool that you cannot even tell.

 

Hope you find the right spring, soon.

 

I did not know there are one-color-printers, sounds like something that should not be an issue? It's not like cartridges where the ink is in a container 🤔

 

But white is still good, since you can color it :) Like you did for the eyes.

 

42 minutes ago, Bean Sidhe said:

Youngest Agent has been watching Fairy Tail and I haven't really had a chance to sit down.

Fairy Tail sounds fun, too. My sis is also having me watch her shows in my free time haha

  • Like 2

Level ☆ human [uncategorizable]
STR 2 | DEX 3 | CON 2 | STA 3 | WIS 5 | CHA 5
Current challenge: Athena focuses on the physical | 
Battle log

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9 hours ago, Bean Sidhe said:

So I did some looking and there are Kodama that have shaking heads. I want to print one but I need to figure out how to get the spring they used. They just said "Spring x" which does not return the same results via Amazon or Google.

 

That is awesome. Springs are not my area of expertise, but I'd imagine the key features are diameter and length, and possibly sproinginess (which is a technical term). Diameter will probably be a bit flexible, because it just has to loosely slot over a post and  not come off, and there's some variation in 3D prints. Length may need to be more precise, but is also easily altered at home if you have some wire snips. Sproinginess would be largely aesthetic, and I would think as sproingy as possible would look nice.

  • Like 2

I felt like I could run forever, like I could smell the wind and feel the grass under my feet, and just run forever.

Current Challenge: #24 - Mrs. Cosmopolite Challenge

Past: #1, #2, #3, #4, #5, #6,  #7#8, #9#10, #11a & #11b, #12, #13, #14, #15, #16, #17, #18, #19, #20, #21, #22, #23

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On 1/2/2021 at 5:47 PM, sarakingdom said:

 

That is awesome. Springs are not my area of expertise, but I'd imagine the key features are diameter and length, and possibly sproinginess (which is a technical term). Diameter will probably be a bit flexible, because it just has to loosely slot over a post and  not come off, and there's some variation in 3D prints. Length may need to be more precise, but is also easily altered at home if you have some wire snips. Sproinginess would be largely aesthetic, and I would think as sproingy as possible would look nice.

Actually the spring isn't just a spring. The body as a hole in to to place a metal pin with a spring attached to it on. then the head goes on the spring. I just haven't found the spring. I need to do some more looking, but this is one of those things that I will get to when I can.

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Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

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On 1/2/2021 at 9:21 AM, Athena said:

I did not know there are one-color-printers, sounds like something that should not be an issue? It's not like cartridges where the ink is in a container 🤔

 

The printer we have takes a small thread like plastic. The machine can only handle one color at a time, so we have to do solid color prints and then paint if we want other colors. Which is fine, I just need the time to paint it.

 

On 1/2/2021 at 9:21 AM, Athena said:

But white is still good, since you can color it :) Like you did for the eyes.

 

White has worked so far. Apparently I need to paint the unicorn, but I need time to do that.

 

On 1/2/2021 at 9:21 AM, Athena said:

Fairy Tail sounds fun, too. My sis is also having me watch her shows in my free time haha

I haven't seen much of Fairy tail. Youngest Agent of Chaos watches it without me, but I get to hear the whole story when I get home from work. However, one night a week while the boys have scouts, we watch Buffy the Vampire slayer, so that gets entertaining. Especially when the boys walk in halfway through episode 2 and are like "What is going on now." so we have to pause and explain.

  • Like 2

Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

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So update, even with some extreme even for me Chaos, I have managed to get all the boxes.

Saturday, I did end up going over for less than my normal amount, but still more than I would of liked to do cleaning and groceries. apparently she was all worried about the roads and all of them were fine EXCEPT hers, which is common.  Choosen Brother S came by and I talked to him and he agrees where I am. He wishes he could do more and he doesn't get everything, but he has seen my mom and was more than a bit upset about my mom and her rant about how my Bio brother did so well in college with his B- average when I JUST graduated Summa Cum Laude in May. Overall, we had a good visit, but I remember why I miss him now that he moved away. I did get all my boxes adn 43 pts.

Sunday was the day of "No, Bio brother isn't coming, yes he is." they came, Bio Brother didn't really back me like he promised, but he talked to mom with me. He doesn't really get it and every-time we talk I get a "good luck with that" Mom was mom which didn't help, but we all lived through it. By the time I went to bed, I had 46 pts and all the boxes and some serious frustration.  But sadly this isn't new. the new one was I was sad/mad that I had a 2 weeks break at work, I worked 4 full 8 hour days, help mom on all the others and got 2 half days (maybe) to rest and relax.

 

That plus knowing work would be super crazy made going back today hard.

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Current Challenge ---> Bean Si Vs Chaos No energy for a title

You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream - C.S. Lewis

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I'm really glad you have outside people in meatspace who can also reassure you that your mom's a piece of work. 

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Je suis partie pour reconstruire ma vie

C'est dit, c'est ainsi

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Me going on a ramble because I do not compute why you have to endure all of this:

 

Spoiler

My inner sociologist (?) has always wondered how some parents always talk positively about their kids that don't do as great as their other kids, AND don't help as much at home. Maybe it's because the one who does well already has the recognition by the school or their environment or whatever? So they are "compensating" and encouraging the other kid? (Very benevolent explanation and absolutely not justifying her behaviour. At all.) Or is it a chicken and egg problem? What came first? Whatever, my inner sociologist/psychologist has no degree and does not have enough life experience to speculate. It's just that, when I imagine being a parent with more than one kid, I just cannot see myself every saying stuff like that and not going "wait a minute, is this good for the other kid? How do I speak in a way that takes everyone into account, without compromising the individuals?" ('Cause sometimes parents that want to do EVERYTHING equally also do some harm haha. What a balancing act!)

 

Thank you for being there for this person. And taking care of her. Despite her behaviour. Thank you thank you thank you x ad infinitum (I dunno, man, I find it annoying that she does not show gratitude to you so I am doing so. ) And what Flea said. 

 

A pep talk ramble:

Spoiler

 

Also, you freakin' rock. Summa cum laude, whew. I remember already congratulating you but here it is again. Even if you obviously are very awesome and have the mental characteristics to focus on your studies instead of on those distractions, like a a family member that throws mind f* at you if not daily, then weekly. I'm not taking that for granted. What. An. Achievement! :) 

 

Nobody can take that away from you. And you set that standard for your kids, too. I've always gotten strength from having a mom that has suffered through lots of things & has a solid higher education. (Not that everyone HAS to be academically educated, it's just that it helps when you have an example close to you if you want to go that route. And I did/do.)

 

 

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