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Mad Hatter tries not to self destruct


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58 minutes ago, Captainfantastic said:

I'm excited taht you've not dissappeared! stuff looks great! Seeing a lot of green checks!

Thanks! Still here. 😁 (But sadly I got my first cross today)

 

Tbh it's much easier to be here now when my mood is improved. But it's still nice to see the green. 😛 

 

In fact, I'd go as far as saying I had a great time this morning! I put on music and danced around the house on and off. Mostly to combat restlessness, but still! Yay! In the afternoon I had to take a (not quite) nap as I completely pooped out, buuut then I realized I hadn't eaten anything but a banana all day. 🤦‍♀️ After "work" I caught up with my friend who I haven't seen in a good two months and it was just lovely. He kept poking me wondering if I'm hologram. 🤣  (This is why his NY resolution is to be more social haha)

 

Daytime walk ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅  ❌ I meant to but kept forgetting.

Other self care ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ I ticked off an item on my to do list! It was sending a thank you email, which took all of 2 minutes. Plus a month. But it's a tiny start.

Don’t disappear ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ 

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3 minutes ago, Mad Hatter said:

Thanks! Still here. 😁 (But sadly I got my first cross today)

 

Tbh it's much easier to be here now when my mood is improved. But it's still nice to see the green. 😛 

 

In fact, I'd go as far as saying I had a great time this morning! I put on music and danced around the house on and off. Mostly to combat restlessness, but still! Yay! In the afternoon I had to take a (not quite) nap as I completely pooped out, buuut then I realized I hadn't eaten anything but a banana all day. 🤦‍♀️ After "work" I caught up with my friend who I haven't seen in a good two months and it was just lovely. He kept poking me wondering if I'm hologram. 🤣  (This is why his NY resolution is to be more social haha)

 

Daytime walk ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅  ❌ I meant to but kept forgetting.

Other self care ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ I ticked off an item on my to do list! It was sending a thank you email, which took all of 2 minutes. Plus a month. But it's a tiny start.

Don’t disappear ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ 

I LOVE this for you

That's neat, and so are you

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11 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

Tbh it's much easier to be here now when my mood is improved. But it's still nice to see the green. 😛 

 

In fact, I'd go as far as saying I had a great time this morning! I put on music and danced around the house on and off. Mostly to combat restlessness, but still! Yay! In the afternoon I had to take a (not quite) nap as I completely pooped out, buuut then I realized I hadn't eaten anything but a banana all day. 🤦‍♀️ After "work" I caught up with my friend who I haven't seen in a good two months and it was just lovely. He kept poking me wondering if I'm hologram. 🤣  (This is why his NY resolution is to be more social haha)

 

Daytime walk ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅  ❌ I meant to but kept forgetting.

Other self care ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ I ticked off an item on my to do list! It was sending a thank you email, which took all of 2 minutes. Plus a month. But it's a tiny start.

Don’t disappear ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ ✅ 

 

Dancing to music and meeting with is-that-a-real-human-sceptic friend sound nice 🙂

Let cheese and oxen and mead crowd out our secret desires for power and domination - Harriet the Viking

Just be bold, fluid and unapologetic, not small, hairy and indecisive - Harriet the Artist

You can absorb me! - Harriet the Contextless Guru

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16 hours ago, Captainfantastic said:

I LOVE this for you

🤗

 

5 hours ago, Harriet said:

Dancing to music and meeting with is-that-a-real-human-sceptic friend sound nice 🙂

Those are always good things in my books!

 

2 hours ago, KB Girl said:

❤️

 

I think I'm too lazy to have ADHD. 

You lazy HAH! Oh my friend you don't know what lazy means.

 

No no the things that I got all the points for are getting distracted, procrastinating even fun things, being late, having a working memory of a goldfish, time being exceedingly wobbly, losing things, starting all of the hobbies and never sticking with anything, consistency and schedules being dark magic, not being able to focus or focusing all too much*... (LOL that looks so bad when written out) So I mostly score on the "lazy" inattentive kind of ADHD vs the hyperactive kind which is probably what you're thinking of when you say you're "too lazy".

 

*though admittedly being somewhat intelligent and focusing too much is really what's saved my butt through school and work.

 

1 hour ago, sarakingdom said:

*glares at your productivity*

Says the person who's been keeping a list, AND crossing off items on said list, despite sleep deprivation AND the world going cray! You can glare at my one sent email all you want. 😄 

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1 hour ago, Mad Hatter said:
4 hours ago, KB Girl said:

 

You lazy HAH! Oh my friend you don't know what lazy means.

Whatever makes you think that? :D I have some structures in place that make me do stuff and.. kids... but otherwise my preferred thing to do is always nothing. And I still manage to do a whole bunch of nothing. Even my preferred sport is focused on doing as little as possible 😂

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2 minutes ago, KB Girl said:

Whatever makes you think that? :D I have some structures in place that make me do stuff and.. kids... but otherwise my preferred thing to do is always nothing. And I still manage to do a whole bunch of nothing. Even my preferred sport is focused on doing as little as possible 😂

Because you want to do things and you do them and you deal with the things you need to do. Not saying perfectly, but you’re 100% not lazy.

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9 minutes ago, Mad Hatter said:

Because you want to do things and you do them and you deal with the things you need to do. Not saying perfectly, but you’re 100% not lazy.

Not sure why I’m even argueing about this, perhaps because just like social media we tend to look a lot better here on NF? Especially me perhaps because I like to focus on the positive things. But I let Jaap read this and he laughed, just saying.

ive gotten better over the years, but the list of things I want to do and haven’t done is quite enormous and the list of things I need to do and haven’t done... let’s not go there :)  

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5 minutes ago, KB Girl said:

Not sure why I’m even argueing about this, perhaps because just like social media we tend to look a lot better here on NF? Especially me perhaps because I like to focus on the positive things. But I let Jaap read this and he laughed, just saying.

ive gotten better over the years, but the list of things I want to do and haven’t done is quite enormous and the list of things I need to do and haven’t done... let’s not go there :)  

Are you sure you’re not saying that you’re lazy simply because you haven’t completed your impossible to complete to do list? 😛 I’m just curious what standard you (or Jaap) are comparing yourself to? I don’t think the scale goes either you’re a workaholic or you’re lazy, there’s a lot of levels in between. Like does your laziness cause you or your people harm or is otherwise detrimental to your life? Sure I don’t see the whole picture, but I don’t think so. Besides, if you were truly lazy you’d never even set those ambitious goals for yourself. 

Also, thinking about it, lazy is a nasty negative word in general, and not useful for anything besides shaming.

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2 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

So I mostly score on the "lazy" inattentive kind of ADHD

 

7 minutes ago, Mad Hatter said:

Also, thinking about it, lazy is a nasty negative word in general, and not useful for anything besides shaming

🤔

 

8 minutes ago, Mad Hatter said:

I don’t think the scale goes either you’re a workaholic or you’re lazy

No true. I honestly didn’t mean it so bad initially, something just gave me the urge to go “but rose coloured glasses wearing you are!”

Main Quest: becoming a decent kettlebell lifter and a great coach

Current challenge: KB Girl prepares to move

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19 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

In fact, I'd go as far as saying I had a great time this morning! I put on music and danced around the house on and off. Mostly to combat restlessness, but still! Yay! In the afternoon I had to take a (not quite) nap as I completely pooped out, buuut then I realized I hadn't eaten anything but a banana all day. 🤦‍♀️ After "work" I caught up with my friend who I haven't seen in a good two months and it was just lovely. He kept poking me wondering if I'm hologram. 🤣  (This is why his NY resolution is to be more social haha)

I have been considering adding a "personal dance party" mini goal soon -- because it's great and I miss dancing and just like more movement! Glad you realized your fatigue was from total lack of fuel. 😆

 

Hell yeah for friend hangs. 🤗

35 minutes ago, Mad Hatter said:

I did for tomorrow. But now I’m like well I feel pretty good again I don’t need to go haha. I have to keep reminding myself that that’s not the point. 😛

Heheh, definitely not the point! 😝 Glad you got an appt! 

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17 minutes ago, KB Girl said:

🤔

 

I just can't come up with situations where the word lazy is being used productively and without harm. I think it's more of a symptom than a character flaw.

 

Maybe "Can you get off the couch for once and do the dishes you lazy slob?"  or "Why am I always so fucking lazy?" can serve as motivational boost for some people, buuut it seems a lot more likely that the person will internalize it, and remain lazy. I can't think of situations where the word couldn't be replaced with better communication, or less mean self talk, or trying to figure out if the laziness is actually fatigue, or lack of motivation, or boredom, or come up with strategies to be more productive.

 

Even if it's not always that negative, I still think the word's become twisted and a sign of our productivity worshipping culture that something like a restorative, relaxing, enjoyable Sunday has become synonymous with a lazy Sunday. 

 

17 minutes ago, KB Girl said:

No true. I honestly didn’t mean it so bad initially, something just gave me the urge to go “but rose coloured glasses wearing you are!”

I don't think it's rose colored glasses as much as perspective. When your big accomplishment was to send a super easy email, then yeah, keeping your family alive while having your own business, and coaching people and training and developing yourself, while recovering from disease and childbirth does make you seem a bit like super woman. But don't worry, like a real, imperfect one with daily struggles. :P You calling yourself lazy is frankly a bit insulting, a tiny bit to me, but mostly to yourself. 

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1 hour ago, Mad Hatter said:

I did for tomorrow. But now I’m like well I feel pretty good again I don’t need to go haha. I have to keep reminding myself that that’s not the point. 😛

 

"I can breathe just fine now and the cough is gone. I can probably stop using my asthma inhaler now."

 

*two weeks later*

 

"Well, that was a mistake."

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5 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:
6 hours ago, KB Girl said:

 

I just can't come up with situations where the word lazy is being used productively and without harm. I think it's more of a symptom than a character flaw.

 

Maybe "Can you get off the couch for once and do the dishes you lazy slob?"  or "Why am I always so fucking lazy?" can serve as motivational boost for some people, buuut it seems a lot more likely that the person will internalize it, and remain lazy. I can't think of situations where the word couldn't be replaced with better communication, or less mean self talk, or trying to figure out if the laziness is actually fatigue, or lack of motivation, or boredom, or come up with strategies to be more productive.

 

Even if it's not always that negative, I still think the word's become twisted and a sign of our productivity worshipping culture that something like a restorative, relaxing, enjoyable Sunday has become synonymous with a lazy Sunday. 

Yeah ok.. I like and approve of lazy Sunday’s, that doesn’t sound negative to me, it just sounds wonderful. 
I think negative motivation like that is a terrible idea.

 

5 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:
6 hours ago, KB Girl said:

 

I don't think it's rose colored glasses as much as perspective. When your big accomplishment was to send a super easy email, then yeah, keeping your family alive while having your own business, and coaching people and training and developing yourself, while recovering from disease and childbirth does make you seem a bit like super woman. But don't worry, like a real, imperfect one with daily struggles. :P You calling yourself lazy is frankly a bit insulting, a tiny bit to me, but mostly to yourself. 

Perspective? You are comparing apples and oranges. I have Jaap to help me with all that, I work an average of 2 hours a day, the baby is 10 months old, I have unloaded the dishwasher twice this year and apparently unlike your body my kids will just tell me when they’re hungry and they come with hugs and the black magic of imposing a schedule. I even follow the babies nap schedule and in the evening Jaap will send me off to bed.They take care of me. You on the other hand are going through a very rough patch all by yourself in the darkness and with a severe lack of hugs and you are still alive and haven’t gotten fired and you keep supporting your friends and you keep coming back to go another round even in the face of all hopelessness. You taught me about dance parties and celebrating the small wins with a list of positives and bloody hell woman some emails are big things. There is someone still waiting for an email from me since february last year. 
Im not insulting either of us by mentioning one of my symptoms. If I’m a superwoman, and I’m cool with that, then so are you. 

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Main Quest: becoming a decent kettlebell lifter and a great coach

Current challenge: KB Girl prepares to move

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6 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

I just can't come up with situations where the word lazy is being used productively and without harm. I think it's more of a symptom than a character flaw.

NSFW example:

Spoiler

Lazy sex. No one is in a rush, but also no one really wants to put in a lot of work. Things are less focused, but sometimes that's the most satisfying type. ;)

Or a lazy afternoon is, IMO, a good thing - just taking it easy is a totally legitimate choice. 

 

Personally, I think it's only negative when being 'lazy' is no longer a choice, and is instead either a habit and/or an outcome due to energy levels/stress.

 

But then, language is nothing if not a subjective expression of how we're experiencing the world around us! If you don't like the word, you definitely are not under any obligation to listen to someone (ie. myself) trying to change your mind - that's also a totally legitimate choice.

 

Self-talk is also SUPER powerful; so if that term isn't a positive one for you, I absolutely understand not wanting it used to refer to people you respect either. :)

...but I'm adorable! Ask anyone who doesn't know me...

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6 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

I still think the word's become twisted and a sign of our productivity worshipping culture that something like a restorative, relaxing, enjoyable Sunday has become synonymous with a lazy Sunday. 

 

Christianity has the sabbath tradition of Sunday being a rest day. But,  in our culture even most Christians don't follow it. I have been trying to do take Sunday as a relax, reset and enjoy day.When I do that,I find I am so much more ready for the week ahead. But some times it's hard to get over the mindset of I must be doing something

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"Love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your strength, and with all your mind' Luke 10; 27

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Wow, just got caught up on 6 pages.  I am so behind....

 

I love your pics from when it was -22.  I would gladly trade for our -20, which looked exactly like every other temperature but was just miserably cold

 

Also, I am really enjoying the ADHD quiz video you shared.  It was taking too long, though, so I came here to update first and will get back to it soon :D 

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