Respawning for better reasons

[aquadwayne]

I'm respawning after several years. I lifted and tracked macros 6 years ago and lost 120lbs. Since then, I've stopped tracking, lifting, and worrying about my health. I've had job changes, got married, had a baby, lost a grandfather, and had COVID to contend with. My grandpa died in February and I was very close with him. He is the first person I've been close with to die, so it caused me to re-evaluate a lot of things in my life. His health had been deteriorating for the past couple of years with his lungs working less and less, though he also had a history of heart problems (with a heart attack in 1991). Going through photos, sharing stories, and really reflecting on the time I got to spend with him made it clear that I have some serious changes to make in my life if I want to be to my kids/future grandkids what he was to his.

 

As a result, I'm focusing on getting into a better mindset for myself and my wife/kids. I aim to be less materialistic and instead focus on things that are more important. I want to be a more patient person since I've become so driven by results that it's hard to slow down and enjoy things. I also want to lose weight and get to a healthy state which is sustainable. As I mentioned earlier, I tracked calories religiously and obsessed over the numbers (which I don't think is healthy) but as soon as I stopped tracking, the weight started coming back because I hadn't actually addressed my habits or intuitive eating patterns. This time, I'm going to worry less about macros and calories. I'm going to focus on eating "clean" most of the time while listening to my body for cues. In this case, "clean" means minimally processed foods (vegetables, white/brown rice, chicken, steak, hamburger, with some limited fruits). I'm also focusing on my mindset by trying to shift my thinking from "You should be ashamed for eating that roll with butter" to "Yeah, you ate a roll with butter, but you also made a lot of good choices like having grilled chicken with broccoli instead of a huge burger with fries". I want to give myself credit for successes instead of just focusing on failures. I'm also back to strength training, and although I don't know if I'm interested in eventually competing, I want to be a much stronger version of myself.

 

At the end of the day, I want to make good and sustainable changes so I don't have to meticulously track every part of my life until the day I die. I want to find a balance between health and living life. I want to be a healthier version of myself (mentally and physically) for myself and my family.

[Tanktimus the Encourager]

Welcome back!

[Keladris]

Sounds like really solid goals and strong motivation. I know exactly what you mean about needing to find that sweet spot of being healthy and not obsessing.

[aquadwayne]

12 hours ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

Welcome back!

Thanks! It feels good to be back. NerdFitness has been the only community I've ever really felt a part of in the fitness world (or the internet for that matter), at least enough to actively engage. It's sort of like coming home.

 

11 hours ago, Keladris said:

Sounds like really solid goals and strong motivation. I know exactly what you mean about needing to find that sweet spot of being healthy and not obsessing.

When I was doing this before, I had a really bad case of fuckarounditis and switched programs constantly, had cheat weekends every week, and slipped between happy with my progress and telling myself I still looked fat (even though I really wasn't at that point). This time, I'm older (and hopefully wiser) which I think will make it easier to stick with a plan without changing to the "next best thing" every other week. I've also shifted my goals to be more focused on looking better (but not necessarily ripped), feeling better, and being stronger. More specifically, I want to lose about 100-150lbs (eventually) which would put me in a healthy weight range (currently 333lbs, down from 345). I also want the little aches, heavy breathing after a flight of stairs, and being exhausted after a 10 minute bike ride with my daughter to stop. Finally, I want to get the big 3 lifts up to 225 bench, 315 squat, and 405 deadlift. My highest lifts ever were 225 bench (once), 215 squat, and 315 deadlift, but those were years ago so I have some work to do to get back there. I think the name of the game this time is change habits so I can enjoy the adventure rather than just doing a mad dash for the destination.

[Keladris]

Absolutely! I love the NF youtube video about thinking in terms of years and days, not months. So you choose your long terms goals, and then just focus on building up habits day by day. I think that's how you make sustainable change (although I'm only 4 months in myself!). 

I've found just having 2 goal for each challenge has really helped me.

We got this!