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Emma: There is no Reverse Gear on a Motorcycle


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From one of my favorite books. Will be using it this challenge for guidance and inspiration.

 

“Do you know people who won’t let you forget the mistakes you made ages ago?” (Oh, yes. Me, me,  me! I am so good at doing that to myself.)  

“ That’s how your competition and adversaries want you to think.”  (My parents and my ex husband.)

” Disappoint them. Don’t even consider going into reverse. Rather than brooding and letting your self-esteem go down the tubes, be on to your next job, caper, scam, brainstorm or idea. Forget the past, get back on that motorcycle in your mind and move out on the road and into high gear as quickly as possible.”

The past few years, since I was able to settle down in my own place  and not wonder where I was going to sleep that night,  I have been spending a lot of time, too much time, brooding about the past. What I should have done differently, ( the jerk I married), what I could have done, (the dream of being a doctor). And so on and so on. I did the best I could at the time with the resources I had available at that time (and there were damn few resources available at that time). The past is done and I can’t change it. Move on.

Goals for this challenge:

Exercise: I had been trying to make myself do two PT sessions every day. Fail. This past week I have been doing one session, with double sets. Success. Continue with this.

Conserve water:  hand wash my clothes. My itty bitty washer uses a surprising 16 gallons of water per wash. I haven’t measured (yet) but am pretty sure I use a lot less hand washing. (I live alone and have a small wardrobe, I would not even think about trying this otherwise.)

Continuing Education: Have completed the incredibly boring training modules for work Reviews of HIPAA Regulations and elder abuse, dementia, etc. We have to review them every two years or so. Need a few more credits by the end of the month for my state  Xray license.

Screen time: OMG. I know I had a rough week and spent a lot of time online with the Josh Duggar scandal and DS9, but 7 hours and 47 minutes a day is a new and ridiculous record for me. Let’s get that down some.

Eating: I have lost a few pounds here. Skipping breakfast most days, because I am just not hungry when I get up. Trying to listen to what my body is telling me. Having to ignore it a bit (Me talking to Body: We get anemic, remember? And feel crappy, remember? We need to eat some red meat here, not more croissants.)

The big goal for this challenge, though, is the next caper. Move out on the road and go...Where? I don’t really know. I have completed the stuff I wanted to do, most successfully, (bachelor’s degree, job, home, money in the bank) some failures declared to be abandoned (composing, making friends at church, playing music with small groups, LARPing groups). I don’t really know where I want to go from here.  I am pretty content where I am right now. The anxiety kicked in bad when I contemplated joining the band  this summer, I felt that I “should” do something with other people because I “should” start getting out of my bubble and meeting people again (why? I’m pretty content here in my little bubble.) . But I didn’t really like band all that much the last couple of times I did it (music too loud,  hurt my ears loud, singers obnoxiously loud). I’m not criticizing, really, because we were all amateurs or newbies but it wasn’t all that much fun.

I am willing to entertain any and all ideas for my next caper. Throw some at me, please. Legal and ethical only, please.

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1 hour ago, Emma said:

Conserve water:  hand wash my clothes. My itty bitty washer uses a surprising 16 gallons of water per wash. I haven’t measured (yet) but am pretty sure I use a lot less hand washing. (I live alone and have a small wardrobe, I would not even think about trying this otherwise.)

 

Wow. Well, for this goal, I recommend looking up how people wash clothes using dry bags on the road, which will make this a bit less labor intensive, and will point out that Ikea currently has very inexpensive dry bags.

 

I'm not sure about things like scrubs, that may be exposed to stuff. They might really want a hot cycle. (I'm not a fan of the hot cycle, but have embraced it as a pandemic precaution at times.)

 

As for new stuff... any professional growth you'd like, like nursing or administration? (I wouldn't ordinarily push this one to the front of the line, but I think you've got a nonstandard retirement timeline situation. For that matter, socking away some money in a 401k or IRA wouldn't be a bad goal, once your emergency fund is in place, so that's a good next financial goal.)

 

Summer is usually a good time for free outdoor concerts and performances in the city. Covid may affect that, but I'd bet the outdoorsy stuff may go ahead. Making an effort to attend a lot of those may scratch the music itch, and be a really nice summery picnic-in-the-park kind of event. I really recommend this sort of thing if you love one of the arts like music; it's what makes being in a city so culturally rich, and it's accessible to everyone. I'm not even that into music, but it's hard to be anything but pleased with the world when you're having a picnic on the grass with a band nearby on a sunny summer day. So in terms of "living well is the best revenge", this is up there for me.

 

And it's also a way to ease back into being around people. Aside from basic nerd introversion, which is most of us, I suspect you're understandably wary of people right now. Your nearest and dearest weren't that trustworthy when it came to taking care of you, and relationships understandably feel like a demand or a risk right now. People feel like threats, especially in a close context. But just being around people enjoying a sunny day in the park with some music and their kids and whatever, you can enjoy the benefits of being around generally happy, pleasant people without having to actually deal with them or their problems. No need for people just for the sake of it, but that anxiety can be shown the door. Even absent all the anxiety, repeated small exposures to people doing healthy, happy things can be great for the mental health, especially when living alone, and especially with a job that continually exposes you to people in different forms of distress. It's good for all of us to have the reminder that people aren't just distress and sickness and pain, they're also smiles and art and friendliness. Just to refill our humanity tanks when other things are draining them.

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I felt like I could run forever, like I could smell the wind and feel the grass under my feet, and just run forever.

Current Challenge: #24 - Mrs. Cosmopolite Challenge

Past: #1, #2, #3, #4, #5, #6,  #7#8, #9#10, #11a & #11b, #12, #13, #14, #15, #16, #17, #18, #19, #20, #21, #22, #23

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You are somewhere with water restrictions, how about a bike trip up to Lake Tahoe?

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Current Challenge Original 1,2,3, R 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,11,12,13,14,15,16,17,18,19,20,21,22,23,24,25,26,27,28,29,30,31,32,33,34,35,36,37,38,39,40,41,42,43,44,45,46,47,48,49,50,51

52,53,54

"By the Most-Righteous-and-Blessed Beard of Sir Tanktimus the Encourager!" - Jarl Rurik Harrgath

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I have never heard of the dry bag. Very efficient.

A couple of months ago, my itty bitty washer stopped working. I wasn’t sure when or if I would get around to fixing it so I bought this plunger thing and washed all my clothes in the kitchen sink for a couple of weeks. This thing worked great.

https://www.lehmans.com/product/breathing-hand-washer/.    

The washer  started working again on its own a couple of weeks later so in my laziness I went back to using it.

The scrubs get washed separately in hot water and vinegar (to kill the germs). 

New stuff: Nursing. Umm no thank you. That’s why I became an xray tech. Administration? Oh God no no no nononono.  (Emma runs off screaming!!)

Non standard retirement plan :) Yeah you could say that. I am lucky in that my mother left me an inheritance that I used to buy a condo that I rent out. Somehow, my tenant has managed to pay his rent every month without any trouble. My own living expenses are pretty low and I have no debt, so I am socking away my retirement money. My “retirement” plan is actually just to cut back on my work hours in a few years and  work just three to four days a week, kind of ease into retirement. That is what one of my coworkers has planned, one is already doing that. 

Okay, I promise to go to an event at a park sometime this summer and (gulp) sit near (gasp)...people.  :) they do have events like that around here. 

 

 

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58 minutes ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

You are somewhere with water restrictions, how about a bike trip up to Lake Tahoe?

:) Tahoe is a couple of hours outside my butt’s comfort zone. Motorcycle seats are made to fit the bike, not the person.

I was thinking about a trip to Reno but not this summer. Next year. I’m not comfortable traveling yet, because Covid.

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34 minutes ago, Emma said:

I wasn’t sure when or if I would get around to fixing it so I bought this plunger thing and washed all my clothes in the kitchen sink for a couple of weeks. This thing worked great.

 

That's pretty cool! Are you using the dryer as usual, since that's not a water waster?

 

37 minutes ago, Emma said:

Non standard retirement plan :) Yeah you could say that. I am lucky in that my mother left me an inheritance that I used to buy a condo that I rent out. Somehow, my tenant has managed to pay his rent every month without any trouble. My own living expenses are pretty low and I have no debt, so I am socking away my retirement money. My “retirement” plan is actually just to cut back on my work hours in a few years and  work just three to four days a week, kind of ease into retirement.

 

That is a solid plan. I should have a plan that good. :)

 

41 minutes ago, Emma said:

Okay, I promise to go to an event at a park sometime this summer and (gulp) sit near (gasp)...people.  :)

 

You will have enforced fun and you will like it, dammit.

I felt like I could run forever, like I could smell the wind and feel the grass under my feet, and just run forever.

Current Challenge: #24 - Mrs. Cosmopolite Challenge

Past: #1, #2, #3, #4, #5, #6,  #7#8, #9#10, #11a & #11b, #12, #13, #14, #15, #16, #17, #18, #19, #20, #21, #22, #23

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No clothes dryer. Have air dried everything since I moved here. Vintage mobile home, not a lot of space. The washer is taking up half my closet. And I’m getting tired of that. Which is why I’ve been thinking about just getting rid of the thing. Which is, truthfully, a good part of the reason for the hand washing. If I can hack it for the summer, I’ll probably take my closet back and get rid of the washer.

Enforced fun. Dear goddess, will I survive? :) 

Off to work now. Hope nobody bites me.

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26 minutes ago, Emma said:

No clothes dryer. Have air dried everything since I moved here. Vintage mobile home, not a lot of space. The washer is taking up half my closet. And I’m getting tired of that.

 

Oh, gosh, yes. Well, with no dryer, I'm gonna suggest that there are spinners like salad spinners that will mostly-dry clothes and cut your drying time and effort sigificantly, so not everything is annoying. I'm mostly used to seeing them at pool locker rooms for swimsuits, but they also have them for the home. (There are small portable washers for RVs and dorms, but they're not necessarily much better than what you have now.)

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I felt like I could run forever, like I could smell the wind and feel the grass under my feet, and just run forever.

Current Challenge: #24 - Mrs. Cosmopolite Challenge

Past: #1, #2, #3, #4, #5, #6,  #7#8, #9#10, #11a & #11b, #12, #13, #14, #15, #16, #17, #18, #19, #20, #21, #22, #23

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Sunday: On call. Work was light, only two easy cases. Exercises done, walk done.

Monday: exercise done. Walk done early, expected to be hot. Saw a lot of neighbors out early as well.. Had trouble with eye again, like before. Shadow and sparkles. Terrified it might be a retina detachment. Called a different eye doctor. The one I saw last time never did explain that shadow and sparkles and every time I see her she asks me why don’t I go back to my old eye doctor (because he kept canceling my appointments, that’s why. I am beginning to feel unloved by eye doctors :(  ) Anyway new guy did careful exam and said there is a bit of vitreous humor planted right on top of my optic nerve. So the little blob is causing the shadow and I guess the pressure of it right on top of the nerve is causing the sparkles. It will resolve on its own, like it did last time. This doctor did say he was willing to take me on as a new patient. 

Work started out horrible (difficult patients, difficult exams) , but got easier through the night except for overtime. Worked until 2:30.

Tuesday plan: Recovery day. Finish last night’s paperwork, exercise, laundry,  shower,  maybe a little cleaning, definitely more sleep.

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Tuesday: laundry done, paperwork done, leisurely brunch done, too short a nap done. Nothing else. It was good.
Work: Not too bad, only a little whining (from the tech). Only one nurse who couldn’t speak English, but boy, she really had trouble with the language. I gave up. 

Off the next two days.

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Learn from the Past, but Don’t Live There

”Don’t dwell on your bad experiences from the past. They come at a high cost. Value them. Bank them. As I get older I’m asked about regrets. Do I have any? I have three that come to mind, which is far fewer than most people. . ... We all live with our own separate and unique regrets and I’ve willingly paid the price for most of my mistakes. Dwelling on and feeling remorse about my regrets don’t do much good. Learning from them is the only thing you can really do. Do yourself a big favor. Put your regrets in the rear view mirror where thy belong, ride away, and don’t look back.”

Wednesday and Thursday plans: finish last night’s paperwork, get to do list done, (it’s mostly piddly little stuff), get exercise, sleep and bike ride, find recipe to try,  go to grocery store, catch up on laundry, and some CEs. Work on the next caper and  not waste so much time on past regrets.  It’s really hard to move forward when you keep looking in the rear view mirror.

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On 5/9/2021 at 4:00 PM, sarakingdom said:

 

Oh, gosh, yes. Well, with no dryer, I'm gonna suggest that there are spinners like salad spinners that will mostly-dry clothes and cut your drying time and effort sigificantly, so not everything is annoying. I'm mostly used to seeing them at pool locker rooms for swimsuits, but they also have them for the home. (There are small portable washers for RVs and dorms, but they're not necessarily much better than what you have now.)

Trying to squeeze water out of clothes got old real fast. Not knowing how much longer I was going to be hand washing, I searched online for something to help, found spinners and got one. It’s like the spin cycle of a washer and it’s great. Haven’t started on the hand washing yet, need to do some rearranging in the kitchen to get the spinner in here.

(Spoilered because I thought that was going to be a huge picture. Turned out to be just a link to a spinner)

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Whining and a question ahead.

I decided to volunteer to do filing or something with the sheriff’s office so I can be around living breathing people instead of sick and dying people. I called and was told to apply online and email it in. First choice on website went to page not found. Second choice led to pdf that I can download on my iPad, but not fill in or email,  unless there is something you can tell me about it. (I am unable to print from my iPad, my printer is really really old and won’t talk to iPad, but still works great) Third choice was to fire up my antique Mac desktop and download form as word. I can fill in text but the boxes I am supposed to check are a line of words saying FORMCHECKBOX with no actual box to check. I can think of several reasons for this mess. Age of my equipment, Mac instead of pc, iPad instead of pc, or a diabolical test by the sheriff’s office to weed out all but the most determined volunteers.
Any solutions from the computer nerds? 

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25 minutes ago, Emma said:

Whining and a question ahead.

I decided to volunteer to do filing or something with the sheriff’s office so I can be around living breathing people instead of sick and dying people. I called and was told to apply online and email it in. First choice on website went to page not found. Second choice led to pdf that I can download on my iPad, but not fill in or email,  unless there is something you can tell me about it. (I am unable to print from my iPad, my printer is really really old and won’t talk to iPad, but still works great) Third choice was to fire up my antique Mac desktop and download form as word. I can fill in text but the boxes I am supposed to check are a line of words saying FORMCHECKBOX with no actual box to check. I can think of several reasons for this mess. Age of my equipment, Mac instead of pc, iPad instead of pc, or a diabolical test by the sheriff’s office to weed out all but the most determined volunteers.
Any solutions from the computer nerds? 

It is not, in fact, a diabolical test from the Sheriff's office. It is rather that the form in question (and likely the website you were on) was designed during the Clinton Administration and no one at the Sheriff's office cares enough to update it. As for how to fix it, find a pdf editor and download it onto the ipad.

https://www.google.com/search?q=pdf+editor+free&oq=pdf+editor&aqs=chrome.2.69i57j0i67i433j0i67j0j0i433l2j0j0i433j0l2.4303j0j7&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8

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Current Challenge Original 1,2,3, R 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,11,12,13,14,15,16,17,18,19,20,21,22,23,24,25,26,27,28,29,30,31,32,33,34,35,36,37,38,39,40,41,42,43,44,45,46,47,48,49,50,51

52,53,54

"By the Most-Righteous-and-Blessed Beard of Sir Tanktimus the Encourager!" - Jarl Rurik Harrgath

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I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I am going to go PC.  My beautiful iMac is quite old. I can’t update it anymore because the hardware can’t handle it. I have bought two new iMacs in the past few years and ended up returning them both because they performed so much worse than the old one. My professional websites, which I am required to be part of to maintain my license, have gone totally digital. Everything is done online. (Windows), no other options. And now the sheriff’s office... I am tired of having to juggle and adjust and work around.

The plan is to go to Best Buy tomorrow and buy a dell inspiron and an HP laser jet. Dell because we use Dell at work and they have been really reliable despite the rough treatment they get on the road. Inspiron because I just want to use it for internet and email. ( I will keep my old faithful iMac for the rarely used music programs.) HP because my old HP printer is still chugging along, it is so old now I have trouble getting ink for it. Laser jet because no ink. I print documents mostly, no photos or color stuff.

I welcome your thoughts and advice.

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Did not do much of anything today. Tried to cook a New York strip. Didn’t really turn out well. Three hour nap was great. Still have to do exercise and I need to clean kitchen. Got a couple of things on to do list done. Tomorrow is another day!  The blob is resolving much more quickly this time. Much improvement already in my vision.

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Wednesday: exercise was done and kitchen was cleaned.

Thursday: got the rest of the to do list done, except fo the CEs, (damn I need to get a few more done) and then went Shopping. New computer, new printer, needed new sheets, saw a bedspread I liked which led to new curtains. Redecorating bedroom tonight, will set up computer tomorrow and see if I can get that volunteer form filled out. Still need to exercise today, but the night is still young.

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Sigh. New stuff can be too exciting. Got caught up in my new book last night. Exercise and CE didn’t get done. Book is “Premonition” by Michael Lewis about how the pandemic plan got set up to begin with and then how things fell apart when COVID  hit. 
Latest pandemic news: several recent studies from various countries indicate that the vaccines are effective against the new variants. Some(a few?) are getting sick but do not die or require hospitalization.

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Friday: Exercise done, CEs in progress. Didn’t sleep well. Don’t wanna do anything today. Finished the book. Excellent and kinda depressing about how underfunded our public health is and how political the CDC has become. It used to be headed up by civil servants, like Dr Fauci, people who knew what they were doing and  nearly impossible to fire. Now it’s run by political appointees who don’t know or care  a damn thing about public health. Explains a lot about how the CDC has changed over the past few years, from an entity I trusted completely to not (starting before Trump, actually).

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The nerdfitness forum loaded up nice and fast. What is going on?

Just tried some of the sites i tried to load earlier. Nice and fast. I do not understand this. I hate computers.

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