Harriet's Noviciate Healing Magic

[Scaly Freak]

10 hours ago, Harriet said:

I walked away feeling like I'd worked out, but not feeling totally exhausted as I often did in Berkeley after lifting. I kept the workout tiny, less than 30 minutes. I know full body workouts are recommended for beginners, and at my weights I never really got past beginner status in terms of how much I lifted. BUT the recommendations are based not just on how awesome your lifts are, but on your capacity for recovery--beginners are assumed to be better able to recover from their workouts. I think maybe a split could be better for me in terms of recovery. The same thing worked well with walking... a month or two ago I decided I was going to walk 10 000 steps per day, and I walked 50-60 minutes most days. I developed deep hip pains that didn't go away for a few weeks. But now, multiple short walks adding up to roughly 8000 steps or more are not hurting my joints at all. Little walking snacks for the win.

 

This is a sound strategy, especially for someone like you (or me!) where recovery could be a challenge. And when all is said and done, the approach that makes it easier for you to work out consistently and rebuild that habit, is the winning one. 

 

All hail the barbells.

[h3r0]

This is a fantastic strategy and one I have found that I have to follow too. Maybe it's because I am over 40, or my diabetes, or maybe because I am a big ball of stress and anxiety who never sleeps but my recovery sucks. I have found any as written workout plan has to be cut in half or else I burn out in a week or two. 

 

Your plan of couplets, four times a week sounds absolutely perfect. 

 

Happy lifting and all hail to the barbell! 

 

[Harriet]

2 hours ago, h3r0 said:

This is a fantastic strategy and one I have found that I have to follow too. Maybe it's because I am over 40, or my diabetes, or maybe because I am a big ball of stress and anxiety who never sleeps but my recovery sucks. I have found any as written workout plan has to be cut in half or else I burn out in a week or two. 

 

Your plan of couplets, four times a week sounds absolutely perfect. 

 

Happy lifting and all hail to the barbell! 

 

 

ah, I didn't know you also chose a split for recovery purposes. Thanks! Praise the Iron!

[Scaly Freak]

2 hours ago, h3r0 said:

Maybe it's because I am over 40, or my diabetes, or maybe because I am a big ball of stress and anxiety who never sleeps but my recovery sucks. I have found any as written workout plan has to be cut in half or else I burn out in a week or two. 

 

I've noticed this as well, though in my case diabetes is admittedly not as much of a factor. I tend to start out with ambitious workout plans, hit a wall, scale them back, and then I end up improvising adjustments per session as I go.

[Harriet]

Wed & Thursday

Potions: credit

Defence: credit

Transfiguration: credit

Charms: credit.

I'm sticking to everything: whole foods, no poisons, meditation, walking, screens off at nine, stretching before bed, bed at 9:30. I am also doing optional extras such as fasting, breathwork, and cold showers.

 

It's working well. My health watch shows average 8 hr 8 minutes of sleep, whereas previous weeks had been between 7.30 to 7.50. More importantly, the quality is good. My mind was clearer today and I felt like doing things again. I read some Daly. I am starting to feel gross about the amount of tv/internet/games I have been doing. But this time, I am wiser. This is part of the cycle. While I'm unwell, the computer is a valuable distraction at a time when I'm not going to do anything anyway. When I get better, though, it's a distraction from the life I want to be having. It has addictive qualities, obviously. On the I-have-a-terrible-character theory, I would assume that my excessive computer use is due to me being an unmotivated lazy shit, and if I just find the right schedule and follow the tricks in books about habits and self improvement, then I will quit computers, write a novel, and have a full and wonderful life. Unfortunately, this only works until the next slug phase and then I have to start again. Now, on the character theory, I guess the slug phases are just weakness or something and my only option is to keep trying with the habits and schedules and plans and challenges.

But what would an I'm-actually-unwell theory and response look like? Suppose that excessive internet use is a sickness behaviour, a symptom or maybe a useful coping mechanism? Then the sensible response would be to either use it freely when unwell, and take some steps to shake its hold on me when I do get better (it does have habit-forming properties, after all) or maybe find other, less addictive coping mechanisms for when I am unwell so that the habits don't stick around and make me less productive when I feel better. Hmmmm. I could try both. I need to be able to identify what counts as 'well' and what counts as 'not well' and I need some sort of plan based on autoregulation, not on rigid rules. I'll have a think about it. Ideas welcome.

[Scaly Freak]

1 minute ago, Harriet said:

But what would an I'm-actually-unwell theory and response look like? Suppose that excessive internet use is a sickness behaviour, a symptom or maybe a useful coping mechanism? 

 

What's the difference between a sickness behavior and a symptom? 

[Harriet]

17 minutes ago, Scaly Freak said:

What's the difference between a sickness behavior and a symptom? 

 

Hmmm, not much in this case... I guess all sickness behaviour is 'symptoms' but not all symptoms are sickness behaviour. All three ideas (sickness behaviour, symptom, coping mechanism) were meant to suggest the same thing--that the behaviour is a result of being unwell and not of bad character. Just throwing some thoughts around about how to mentally frame this.

[Scaly Freak]

40 minutes ago, Harriet said:

 

Hmmm, not much in this case... I guess all sickness behaviour is 'symptoms' but not all symptoms are sickness behaviour. All three ideas (sickness behaviour, symptom, coping mechanism) were meant to suggest the same thing--that the behaviour is a result of being unwell and not of bad character. Just throwing some thoughts around about how to mentally frame this.

 

That makes sense. The man reason I wondered is because, although all three terms are intended to refer to the same thing, there are different emotions for them. To me, "sickness behavior"  sounds like "things I would not chose to do if I was in a better frame of mind", "coping mechanism" sounds like "things I do because I am not strong enough to manage without them" while "symptom" sounds like "things the illness causes". So all of them are the result of being ill or unwell, but in very different ways, which is why finding that one label that doesn't imply there's something wrong with the unwell person, is so important. Personally, our of these three I like "symptom" the best.  

 

I feel like I should stress that the words, to me, are the most important words in that paragraph. Just because I read those emotional values into them, does not mean you do, or that you meant them that way. A disturbing aspect of the human race being as self-aware (self-centric?) as we are, is that we tend to frame things as if they are all about us, even when they shouldn't be. That's why I prefer to reframe my anxiety and other issues as spells and demons and boss fight attacks. It is considerably easier for me to remember that it's not because of a character flaw on my part, if I see my my insomnia as a stealth attack by Self-Sabotage, than as a result of factors within my control, and paradoxically that also makes it easier for me to alter those same factors.

[Harriet]

7 minutes ago, Scaly Freak said:

 

That makes sense. The man reason I wondered is because, although all three terms are intended to refer to the same thing, there are different emotions for them. To me, "sickness behavior"  sounds like "things I would not chose to do if I was in a better frame of mind", "coping mechanism" sounds like "things I do because I am not strong enough to manage without them" while "symptom" sounds like "things the illness causes". So all of them are the result of being ill or unwell, but in very different ways, which is why finding that one label that doesn't imply there's something wrong with the unwell person, is so important. Personally, our of these three I like "symptom" the best.  

 

Interesting! I like 'sickness behaviour' because it's something that mice display when they have high levels of inflammation, for example. We don't create stories about higher level motivation and character virtues with regards to mice. We assume they are a certain type of animal that responds to their situation, and we explain their behaviour based on concrete mechanisms rather than blaming or accusing them. So, noticing what's similar about me and mice helps me get away from the complex stories I use on myself, and place the focus on my situation (including internal situations, like inflammation). This is good because theories based on higher level motivations and character virtue have failed me thus far, but I have high hopes for the actually-sick theory and its applications.

 

7 minutes ago, Scaly Freak said:

I feel like I should stress that the words, to me, are the most important words in that paragraph. Just because I read those emotional values into them, does not mean you do, or that you meant them that way. A disturbing aspect of the human race being as self-aware (self-centric?) as we are, is that we tend to frame things as if they are all about us, even when they shouldn't be. That's why I prefer to reframe my anxiety and other issues as spells and demons and boss fight attacks. It is considerably easier for me to remember that it's not because of a character flaw on my part, if I see my my insomnia as a stealth attack by Self-Sabotage, than as a result of factors within my control, and paradoxically that also makes it easier for me to alter those same factors.

 

The way you frame your challenges is powerful and awesome, but also useful and sensible, and has inspired me during the time I've been here.

[Scaly Freak]

2 hours ago, Harriet said:

Interesting! I like 'sickness behaviour' because it's something that mice display when they have high levels of inflammation, for example. We don't create stories about higher level motivation and character virtues with regards to mice. We assume they are a certain type of animal that responds to their situation, and we explain their behaviour based on concrete mechanisms rather than blaming or accusing them. So, noticing what's similar about me and mice helps me get away from the complex stories I use on myself, and place the focus on my situation (including internal situations, like inflammation). This is good because theories based on higher level motivations and character virtue have failed me thus far, but I have high hopes for the actually-sick theory and its applications.

 

Now I like 'sickness behavior' as well, because within that context it sounds very non-judgemental. And honestly, anything that stops the complex self-blaming stories is good, and is something we all should embrace. Sickness behavior it is.  

[Harriet]

Squats today, and some single legged KB deadlifts for hips & balance.

A trainer dude was watching me warm up for the squats and told me my feet weren't wide enough and that my knees were coming in. I tried putting my feet wider but it felt really bad. Why did I listen to him? I know where to put my feet. I dropped the weight even more to focus on all the stuff I have to work on (bracing hard, breaking at the knees and hips simultaneously, not letting the knees come in). I think my knees are not that bad. I think they tick inward a little rather than caving properly. I told him I hadn't lifted for a year and a half, had lost strength, and wasn't sure how much weight I even wanted to be lifting, and he gave me a strange look and went away. I felt really off balance after that. I don't know why, or why I bothered explaining myself to him. I didn't like being watched.

 

Anyway, I didn't really feel any of the 'right' muscles working during my squats, only a general feeling of effort. But my legs were a bit wobbly afterwards, so I guess we're good. It was even a little difficult to do my one legged KB DLs, not because of the weight but because of my balance. Maybe I can put them before my squats?

 

In potions news, I tried eating mackerels out of a tin. It smelled very fishy... like fish bones or cat food. I managed to eat it, though. Someone tell me that disliked food (liver, fish) gets better with repeated exposures, please... I also ate probably 700 calories of chocolate and cheese after I got back from the gym. Not good, even if chocolate is healing magic. Might have to have something prepared beforehand for post-gym munchies.

[Elastigirl]

Woot for eating the mackerel! As for liking it better, sometimes it just comes with different ways of trying it. Liver is such a powerhouse of food, I really need to to try it more often. When I've had it , I just pureed it in the food processor, and added it to stew

[Scaly Freak]

3 hours ago, Harriet said:

A trainer dude was watching me warm up for the squats and told me my feet weren't wide enough and that my knees were coming in. I tried putting my feet wider but it felt really bad. Why did I listen to him? I know where to put my feet. I dropped the weight even more to focus on all the stuff I have to work on (bracing hard, breaking at the knees and hips simultaneously, not letting the knees come in). I think my knees are not that bad. I think they tick inward a little rather than caving properly. I told him I hadn't lifted for a year and a half, had lost strength, and wasn't sure how much weight I even wanted to be lifting, and he gave me a strange look and went away. I felt really off balance after that. I don't know why, or why I bothered explaining myself to him. I didn't like being watched.

 

He was being rude. It doesn't matter how off your form is and how much his OCD screams at him to say something, walking up to a person you don't know in a gym and start giving them "helpful advice" is not okay. 

 

You listened to him because you're a nice person and you are still figuring things out. In a few weeks from now, when your inner Warrior has found her balance, you will be able to give him a blank and confused look, point to your headphones, and go back to ignoring him.  

[Harriet]

10 hours ago, Scaly Freak said:

 

He was being rude. It doesn't matter how off your form is and how much his OCD screams at him to say something, walking up to a person you don't know in a gym and start giving them "helpful advice" is not okay. 

 

You listened to him because you're a nice person and you are still figuring things out. In a few weeks from now, when your inner Warrior has found her balance, you will be able to give him a blank and confused look, point to your headphones, and go back to ignoring him.  

 

I don't wear headphones when working out, but maybe I can bring them and point to them anyway 😁

[Mad Hatter]

On 8/16/2021 at 2:32 PM, Harriet said:

I was assuming it would come back faster! The PRs are definitely part of the fun, just like levelling up in a game. But this time we're going for relaxed roleplaying, not joyless EXP farming.

LOVE this analogy!

 

On 8/19/2021 at 6:50 PM, Harriet said:

I'm sticking to everything: whole foods, no poisons, meditation, walking, screens off at nine, stretching before bed, bed at 9:30. I am also doing optional extras such as fasting, breathwork, and cold showers.

 

It's working well.

Amazing.

 

14 hours ago, Harriet said:

I also ate probably 700 calories of chocolate and cheese after I got back from the gym. Not good, even if chocolate is healing magic. 

Ngl, sounds pretty great to me. 😄

 

16 minutes ago, Harriet said:

I don't wear headphones when working out, but maybe I can bring them and point to them anyway 😁

HA that'd be hilarious.

[sarakingdom]

On 8/14/2021 at 7:20 AM, Harriet said:

I'm confused. I thought these things went together. I thought any darkening is proof that the sun has affected you, and that as such there will be invisible UVA damage, since the sun always gives us both, right?

 

I'm suspicious that this is a priority difference between countries that have an ozone layer and ones that don't. In countries that don't, you need to catch the relatively harmless signs a lot sooner, because you're missing a critical layer of environmental protection. In countries that do, they remain relatively harmless signs.

 

It's kind of like how a childhood skinned knee is really different if you have haemophilia. It's totally harmless, routine, and expected... unless you're one of the people at risk of bleeding out from it. Sunlight is a legitimate health disaster in Australia. The skin cancer risk of having no ozone layer is no joke. In the rest of the world, it's more rare, and you generally have to have multiple severe burns with blisters plus a solid decade or more of exposure to even run the risk. So applying Australian rules to the rest of the world is sort of overkill, because the health impact of the sun is not the same. It's safe and sensible, but not exactly the experience or rules of thumb the rest of us have.

[sarakingdom]

18 hours ago, Harriet said:

I told him I hadn't lifted for a year and a half, had lost strength, and wasn't sure how much weight I even wanted to be lifting, and he gave me a strange look and went away. I felt really off balance after that.

 

This is pure uncharitable speculation, but in one version of this story, that's a guy who expected you to be a newbie (because women always are, right?) and was negging your form for an excuse to "help" you train and show off his manly brain in his native domain, and then was put off his pick-up game when he realized you knew your way around weights.

[Harriet]

1 hour ago, sarakingdom said:

 

I'm suspicious that this is a priority difference between countries that have an ozone layer and ones that don't. In countries that don't, you need to catch the relatively harmless signs a lot sooner, because you're missing a critical layer of environmental protection. In countries that do, they remain relatively harmless signs.

 

It's kind of like how a childhood skinned knee is really different if you have haemophilia. It's totally harmless, routine, and expected... unless you're one of the people at risk of bleeding out from it. Sunlight is a legitimate health disaster in Australia. The skin cancer risk of having no ozone layer is no joke. In the rest of the world, it's more rare, and you generally have to have multiple severe burns with blisters plus a solid decade or more of exposure to even run the risk. So applying Australian rules to the rest of the world is sort of overkill, because the health impact of the sun is not the same. It's safe and sensible, but not exactly the experience or rules of thumb the rest of us have.

 

I agree that applying Australian rules may not be necessary here. I think I shall treat very light freckles in the summer as a harmless dose of the same substance that would be toxic in larger doses. I mean, it's probably harmful to not get enough sun, too, for other reasons. Vitamin D and circadian rhythm and other animal things we haven't scienced yet.

 

54 minutes ago, sarakingdom said:

 

This is pure uncharitable speculation, but in one version of this story, that's a guy who expected you to be a newbie (because women always are, right?) and was negging your form for an excuse to "help" you train and show off his manly brain in his native domain, and then was put off his pick-up game when he realized you knew your way around weights.

Well, possibly. He was watching me struggle with the clips (really bad, really stiff old clips that are hard to fit on the bars. I hate them. ) and warming up with tiny weights, so yeah, that combined with the fact that I'm not a hulking manbeast might have encouraged him to think I was a total noob and that hanging around watching and giving advice would be good and even appreciated. But the weird bit was definitely him not replying when I talked, and just walking off without saying anything after watching me squatting. ETA I don't think he wanted to 'pick up' because he was a lot older than me. I do think he might have wanted to feel good about showing off his expertise.

[Harriet]

4 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

LOVE this analogy!

 

Amazing.

 

Thanks 😊

 

4 hours ago, Mad Hatter said:

Ngl, sounds pretty great to me. 😄

 

Just so you know, my chocolate is 100%. Black chocolate. It tastes like a bitter little fat tablet. I love it, but I also like vegemite.

[sarakingdom]

3 hours ago, Harriet said:

I agree that applying Australian rules may not be necessary here. I think I shall treat very light freckles in the summer as a harmless dose of the same substance that would be toxic in larger doses. I mean, it's probably harmful to not get enough sun, too, for other reasons. Vitamin D and circadian rhythm and other animal things we haven't scienced yet.

 

It seems like a rule of thumb I'd be comfortable with. If you freckle easily, I doubt it's one even the most sunphobic northern types would take issue with.

 

If you're in Australia, though, please wear sunscreen under an SPF-rated burka.

 

3 hours ago, Harriet said:

But the weird bit was definitely him not replying when I talked, and just walking off without saying anything after watching me squatting. ETA I don't think he wanted to 'pick up' because he was a lot older than me. I do think he might have wanted to feel good about showing off his expertise.

 

Yeah, exactly. I wasn't necessarily being super literal about the pickup, but he had this stereotype of you being the damsel in distress he could impress with his manliness, and had his understanding of the situation shaken. The next thoroughly uncharitable guess is that he's weird about foreigners, and ditto when you spoke. I mean, possibly he's just weirdly rude. But if he's not, he was thrown off his assumptions by something. The most obvious one was frail little ladies in the gym waiting for his manly advice.

 

[Harriet]

36 minutes ago, sarakingdom said:

It seems like a rule of thumb I'd be comfortable with. If you freckle easily, I doubt it's one even the most sunphobic northern types would take issue with.

 

I do indeed freckle easily. I am not Northern, though. I am an un-coaxing non-elf with nut brown hair.

 

36 minutes ago, sarakingdom said:

If you're in Australia, though, please wear sunscreen under an SPF-rated burka.

 

I shall, when next I visit. Or maybe a mourning veil and a parasol in black lace. Or dungarees and a broad leather hat with corks on. The corks also help deflect light, though they do let some through. Maybe they need more corks to plug the gaps?

 

36 minutes ago, sarakingdom said:

Yeah, exactly. I wasn't necessarily being super literal about the pickup, but he had this stereotype of you being the damsel in distress he could impress with his manliness, and had his understanding of the situation shaken. The next thoroughly uncharitable guess is that he's weird about foreigners, and ditto when you spoke. I mean, possibly he's just weirdly rude. But if he's not, he was thrown off his assumptions by something. The most obvious one was frail little ladies in the gym waiting for his manly advice.

 

Germans can be a bit unfriendly at times, but I'm often not sure if it's xenophobia or something else. Usually if they know I'm Australian they're nice enough. But no, I think you're right and the dude was hoping to be the manly rescuer but realised I didn't need his help and was put off.

[Scaly Freak]

10 hours ago, Harriet said:

I don't wear headphones when working out, but maybe I can bring them and point to them anyway 😁

 

Once or twice in the Before Times, I forgot t charge my earphones before working out, and had them die on me before or during the workout. I wore them anyway, because it's one of the most effective non-confrontational way there is, to tell people to leave me alone while I'm lifting.  

[Harriet]

Things are going well. I finished reading Daly (finally!) and started reviewing my notes to decide what I want to focus on and write about. No joint pain, no brain fog, lowish energy but not excessive or unpleasant fatigue. Yesterday I really wanted to go to bed at 8:50pm... so I did. Slept until 6am and felt good about it 😊 maybe just needed the extra after squats.

[Harriet]

Bench and chin up negatives today. I remember how to bench, yay! I found that 27.5kg was challenging but not exhausting. I couldn't find a comfy place to do chin up negatives, though. I don't like jumping at a metal bar. Hmm. I saw a dude training another dude in the olympic lifts with an empty barbell--it was obviously his first time. I was so envious. I started thinking about how I can't even do a dip, pull up or proper push up, which one of the trainers said were prerequisites for the advanced classes. I was thinking about all the lifts I need to add to my programme. But wait! Is this the do-too-much-as-soon-as-I-start-to-feel-slightly-better trap? I guess so. I need to keep my workouts short if I want to go four times per week. So I have to be really selective about what assistance exercises to include. I guess I could do two assistance exercises IF they're light and IF I keep the total number of sets down. Oh, and I should probably stay away from pushups because of the ganglion cyst. Unless I can find little bars to do them on. But it would be nice to keep some dynamic lifts, with kettlebells for now  (until I can have the strength and can convince someone to train me in oly lifts) Would it be wrong to go to the gym six days per week? Hmmm.

[Harriet]

The intermittent fasting isn't fitting so well with the morning lifting, so I'm thinking about doing longer fasts less often. My primary goal is health--autophagy, reduced inflammation, ketone production and cell repair--not weight loss, though a little weight loss would be welcome (currently 67kg, probably would look and feel pretty good at 62kg? not urgent). I am doing my first 24 hour fast (not 'clean' but with 50 calories of milk for tea because what is life or indeed """health""" without tea?) Send me good vibes and distractions, please, for tomorrow. Send me a word puzzle and an article on some obscure but fascinating aspect of animal biology or art history or human pyschology.