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On 1/9/2022 at 6:41 PM, juliebarkley said:

Ontario's mental health provisions are ... not great ... and when Covid started doing a number on people they realized our system was never going to be able to cope. So they contracted out the lower-end stuff. It looks like the set you up with a therapist that you send text questions to, and they assign you things to read and work on, and it uses some kind of cognitive behavioural therapy. All for free (at point of use of course; nothing is actually free).

Oh that is interesting. I might look into that a bit. Though aside from my hermit-ness I am feeling okay right now. But definitely good to put that in my back pocket.

 

On 1/9/2022 at 6:41 PM, juliebarkley said:

(And then I could stop leaning so hard on you guys; I do feel bad about burdening you like that.)

I mean .. I figure if people didn't want to take part then they just wouldn't respond :)  So the people who are responding want to respond! 

 

9 hours ago, juliebarkley said:

Habits

Exercise: yes. I fell on the ice while running errands today and landed on my wrist.

Yay but oh noooooo! I hope your wrist feels better :( I got weak ass wrists so I feel this in my soul. 

 

9 hours ago, juliebarkley said:

Rolled getting my yearly goals into a more respectful format so I can read them every day. And did it. 

I feel this is a big part of staying focused throughout the year. I am trying to have my list of yearly goals where I can see them and be reminded often. 

 

9 hours ago, juliebarkley said:

Thanks. :) I'm really new at this whole sharing-and-asking-for-help thing, so maybe not surprising that I go to the wrong place to do it?

I don't think it's necessarily the wrong place. We just might not be as equipped to help but we want to help! :) And maybe it will make you feel more comfortable asking for help and sharing. Warm your feet so to speak.

 

Spoiler
9 hours ago, juliebarkley said:

I never think to hang out either, but also don't really have anyone to hang out with. Last time I tried to invite someone for an activity, they thought I was trying to date them. No? So I'm probably not doing that right either. 🤷‍♀️

Oh gosh lol thats a bit awkward. Like nooooo just want to hang out actually...calm yoself lol. My one bestie I wouldn't mind hanging out with more lives 2.5hr roundtrip from me :(  and she has 4 kids so its always chaos and I don't really get to hang out with her much when I do go lol. She's the same as me haha she never asks to hang out either. But she also doesn't have money for gas.  My other friend lives 45min - 1hr away and I don't really feel comfortable going to her apartment right now or having her at my house because shes going in and working in Toronto and I am going to the barn and such. Plus shes allergic to everything so she only just got a vaccine in November and she had to stay overnight in the hospital. It was a whole thing. We have been doing virtual game nights but again she's the one that reaches out ... I feel TURRIBLE about that but I just don't get the urge to hang out with people haha. I am her only in person friend so I should put more effort in there. We would go to 1-2 musicals every year before covid :) And my other friend finally lives closer to me (maybe 15-30 min drive) but shes a teacher in a pandemic. Soooo lol But she started doing art and we talk way more because of that. We were supposed to do a paint night either in person or virtual some time soon. Again shes the one always inviting me to do things. I love my friends and I hope they keep inviting me to do things LOL or else I will never see them. I should probably let them know haha.

 

9 hours ago, juliebarkley said:

I would be more hermity too if I had a spouse. Or rather, I was when I had a spouse. Right now I have my son and he's a fantastic source of sarcastic banter and companionship, but he's not going to be around forever, and I would really like to not be left permanently alone after he grows up and makes his own life, you know? So I have to try to build myself a social life and not screw it up.

Haha we don't even spend much time together. Typically we watch shows together while we eat  then after he goes and plays video games with his brother for the rest of the night. I used to play video games with him and his brother but for a few reasons I stopped unless its a game I can pick up and put down. They literally like to play for 4-5hr chunks which I just cannot do physically or mentally. I kept getting behind in games where you need to level and make progress because I am at the barn 3 days a week and  I don't like playing as long as they do. Or some of the games they do play that aren't a huge time sink are stressful to me and require team play to win and some people get competitive -cough League of Legends cough- lol. So usually when they go to play games I will go for a walk, watch my stories, paint/random other craft, read, play an RPG single player game or all of the above. Occasionally we will read comics together, watch a movie in the evening or go for a car ride. We do spend more time together in the summer when we can go camping or to the cottage haha.  He is wanting to cut back on gaming this year so we will see. We will probably start working out together sometime soon. I just need to sort out my foot issue.

 

9 hours ago, juliebarkley said:

I could try. I have kind of saved every forum post and personal message that I got when I was in need of support in the past that say nice things about me or express care and I read them sometimes when I need to hear something good about myself or need to feel that  someone cares. And then hope that person still means now what they wrote then. God, that sounds so pathetic. I have other stuff saved too, like compliment emails from customers at work, for the same kind of reason. I have heard recommendations to actually make files like that for just this purpose, which at least means I'm not the only one who does this.

I don't think that sounds pathetic at all. It sounds nice.... like your very own personal compliment board. I am more of a visual person myself so when I am feeling down I will look back on pictures or videos I took when I was happy / doing things I am proud of.  It is all just recalling good memories and experiences :)

If you like being crafty (or just like crafty people) and enjoy crazy people you might enjoy GISH? "Global International Scavenger Hunt" its literally a community of nice crazy (sometimes crafty) people who have an obsession with Supernatural (the show) and helping people. Run by Misha Collins who played Castiel in the show. The main hunt is usually end of August or early September and they run a bunch of mini hunts through the year. You get put on a team and you choose tasks to do. Not all are crafty.. some are volunteering, doing a thing, doing nice things, there was an engineering one last time, puzzles, etc. 

 

9 hours ago, juliebarkley said:

No, it is helpful, partly because it is about you. Hearing another person's experiences and thoughts helps me relate to my own, and helps me feel less alone. So thank you. :)

Excellent! :) 

 

9 hours ago, juliebarkley said:

I should say actually, that by throwing up their hands and admitting defeat, they probably improved service for minor mental health issues in Ontario. I don't believe treatment for minor depression or anxiety through therapy was something covered under OHIP before. You could pay for it privately at around $150/session, or go to the doctor and probably get either pills or instruction to stop bothering them with trivial things, depending on your doctor.

I think that it could be covered but you had to go to a doctor who made the recommendation then you would be put on a waitlist that could take years before you were matched up with a psychiatrist. So it was faster if you went private. I should say though that I don't know from personal experience, this is just what one of my friends said about trying to get to talk to someone about his depression. 

 

 

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35 minutes ago, Rookie said:

 

I mean .. I figure if people didn't want to take part then they just wouldn't respond :)  So the people who are responding want to respond! 

 

That's one of the good things about online interactions, in my mind - it is impossible to force a conversation to happen. Unlike in the non-internet world, where suddenly walking away from someone who is talking to me is considered rude, in a forum like this one, the option of not responding, or of not reading, if I don't want to participate, is ever-present and easy to act on. And no one but me decides if I will act on it or not. Sorry @juliebarkley.... you are just not that powerful ;) 

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Reading Challenge Thread 2022

“I've always believed that failure is non-existent. What is failure? You go to the end of the season, then you lose the Super Bowl. Is that failing? To most people, maybe. But when you're picking apart why you failed, and now you're learning from that, then is that really failing? I don't think so." - Kobe Bryant, 1978-2020. Rest in peace, great warrior.

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13 hours ago, juliebarkley said:

Thanks. :) I'm really new at this whole sharing-and-asking-for-help thing, so maybe not surprising that I go to the wrong place to do it? I come to you guys because I have had good experiences in the past, which lead me to think that some people here genuinely do care. That is a wonderful feeling, not gonna lie. But I don't want to take advantage of people's goodwill either. It would be good if this helped someone else - I basically screwed up the courage to face it myself and talk about it from seeing others talk about their struggles in their own challenges.

 

 

Like @Rookie said, this isn't the wrong place! Just different. As an analogy - if you were in a group of beginner fiddle students, you could get lots of song suggestions, bow-holding tips that worked for them, exercise books that they've liked, and commiseration regarding tricky parts in songs that take forever to learn. Those suggestions and shared experiences can be really helpful and also provide a lot of encouragement and moral support, but your skills will improve faster if you also have an expert fiddle instructor who can assign you homework and give you feedback on your technique :). After your lesson, you might still benefit from talking through what you learned with other students. Maybe you have a conversation about music theory with someone who plays piano, too, and share creativity and consistent practice tips with a painter. Different people will have different perspectives and supplement your structured classes.  (This is not me saying you need to talk to other people about music - I just thought it would be a more enjoyable example then something medical!)

 

Since text therapy is by nature a limited type of support and will still require a lot of self-motivation, I would definitely encourage you to continue seeking support and advice elsewhere, too :).

 

13 hours ago, juliebarkley said:

That others have gone through the same thing is comforting; I feel less alone and weird. (Though it did also make me think "so clearly everyone has these thoughts and they are nothing special and you are making a big deal out of nothing and just being dramatic and attention-seeking" ... so I should probably add that to the list I'm making. ;)

 

 

Yep, another one for the list! I think most people have specific flavours of negative thoughts, feelings, and/or anxieties, but they'll differ in terms of how easy it is for them to recognise those thoughts/feelings, what coping/reframing strategies they use, and how much support they have. We'll also have different types of experiences(/trauma) that have contributed to those thoughts/feelings. You probably wouldn't be able to explore that latter aspect as much with CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) text therapy, but you could hopefully still get helpful strategies from it.

 

And like @Rookie and @Scaly Freak said, it's really not possible for you to demand anything from us via a computer screen (and if it is, we have bigger problems like the loss of free will 😅). You're not responsible for other people's decisions, reactions, or boundaries. 

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On 1/9/2022 at 5:41 PM, juliebarkley said:

I don't know. That feels like the kind of thing you do for "real" mental health problems. I'm not falling apart from it or anything.  ...  (And then I could stop leaning so hard on you guys; I do feel bad about burdening you like that.) This looks very promising. Thank you for making me find this again!

 

I agree with @Alanna and @Scaly Freak, it is useful to get professional advice. Just like most people could use physical therapy when they pull a muscle, most people have some less-than-ideal thought pattern they picked up somewhere  along the way that could be improved.

 

13 hours ago, juliebarkley said:

That others have gone through the same thing is comforting; I feel less alone and weird. (Though it did also make me think "so clearly everyone has these thoughts and they are nothing special and you are making a big deal out of nothing and just being dramatic and attention-seeking" ... so I should probably add that to the list I'm making. ;)
 

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I never think to hang out either, but also don't really have anyone to hang out with. Last time I tried to invite someone for an activity, they thought I was trying to date them. No? So I'm probably not doing that right either. 🤷‍♀️

 

That's because misfits are the best and most interesting. ;) Probably one of the reasons I like the Esperanto community - it has lots of people in unusual religions and political movements, or not "normal" in some other way, and everyone is friendly and accepting and just wants to talk to interesting people about interesting things. NF is a big part of my social life too. If I include the bits that have drifted off the forums, it pretty much is my social life.

 

I would be more hermity too if I had a spouse. Or rather, I was when I had a spouse. Right now I have my son and he's a fantastic source of sarcastic banter and companionship, but he's not going to be around forever, and I would really like to not be left permanently alone after he grows up and makes his own life, you know? So I have to try to build myself a social life and not screw it up.

 

Spoiler

I am with you and the other hermits here on not having people to hang out with. I have one local friend who I see regularly. I do have my spouse (Dumbledore), but we don't actually spend all that much time doing things together. Better than before Covid, but still not much. I enjoy the company of Elf and Cleo, but they rarely emerge from their room.

 

I noticed over the last two years that none of the other people I know have reached out. I got to see people for activities - spinning group, aikido practice and video watching. No one just called to talk or suggested getting together. That is why I value conversations here so much. It feels easier to meet new people here than IRL.

 

 

 

 

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 Replies at the end again, because there are more than I'm used to and my updates are kind of short by comparison!

 

Habits

Exercise: yes. I'm still tired - all the extra shifts and schedule changes are starting to catch up with me but there's mooore coming.... - so in order to keep the habit when I really didn't feel like a workout, I tried out the Recovery module. It's supposed to be for getting in some movement on a day after a hard workout when you are achey. It was pretty neat - it had a lot of movements I have never seen or tried before.

Reading: yes. A fairly long chapter (compared to the previous ones anyway) on the different forms that non-fiction can take and how the content of the pieces is inherently influenced by the form (echoes of "the medium is the message"). Also read some more of Ghost Empire, as it is my suppertime book. This one is an odd one. It is not giving me the LaSalle content promised on the back. At least half, I would say, of the writing so far has been about the author's journey, including an evaluation of the restaurants in small-town Louisiana (why?). I would have dumped it a while ago were it not for the fact that some of the author's lengthy asides are actually quite insightful and thought-provoking. I've just finished reading one that talked about how the different experiences of American colonists vs French colonists with respect to their interactions with indigenous peoples - the Americans, who won in almost every case and were certain they would continue to do so; the French, surrounded by the powerful Iroquois war machine, losing over and over and always shoring up against the next inevitable loss, but believing that even losing could have a dark beauty and heroism to it - shaped the founding mythology, heroic figures, architecture, and even religion of both peoples. He's not wrong, and the more I think through it the righter he gets. The forces that produced both Manifest Destiny and Je me souviens are still influential today. And that's why I'm still working through this book. :) But I want more of LaSalle, please.

Quran: yes. Discovered that my app tracks both time and verses by week. My numbers are low, but I don't care. Stop trying to shame me, app. I'm doing better than before, and that's what matters. Quality over quantity.

Prayer: yes. 

Fiddle: yes. The squeaking is much better since tuning!

Duo: yes.

 

Tasks

Rolled working on my investment plan (not actually part of the challenge, but it was on my Second Quadrant list from before). This badly needs review that I really cannot give it right now. Perhaps tomorrow, when I am a bit fresher. But it will only be fairly general, an overview of sorts with basic thoughts on selection criteria, because I have other things I want to sort out first before I get into the meat of it later this year. Ignoring your investments and not swapping them out overmuch is not the worst thing you can do, or so I'm told. ;)

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

On 1/10/2022 at 4:38 AM, Alanna said:

That is exciting! What songs are they, and what type of music do you like to play/want to learn to play? 

  Missed this the first time; sorry! The ones I'm doing are old folk classics - Oh Susanna, Clementine, and She'll be Coming 'Round the Mountain - to play with someone else who is also practicing an instrument. My goal is to learn what I guess would be called "old-time" or Canadian folk fiddle. The Ottawa Valley has a strong tradition, as does Quebec, the Maritimes, and the Métis and some other indigenous groups. :)

 

14 hours ago, Rookie said:

But definitely good to put that in my back pocket.

That's why I hung onto it, and now I'm glad I did!

 

14 hours ago, Rookie said:

I mean .. I figure if people didn't want to take part then they just wouldn't respond :)  So the people who are responding want to respond! 

Okay, good point.
 

Spoiler

 

14 hours ago, Rookie said:

My one bestie I wouldn't mind hanging out with more lives 2.5hr roundtrip from me :(  and she has 4 kids so its always chaos and I don't really get to hang out with her much when I do go lol. She's the same as me haha she never asks to hang out either. But she also doesn't have money for gas.  My other friend lives 45min - 1hr away and I don't really feel comfortable going to her apartment right now or having her at my house because shes going in and working in Toronto and I am going to the barn and such. Plus shes allergic to everything so she only just got a vaccine in November and she had to stay overnight in the hospital. It was a whole thing. We have been doing virtual game nights but again she's the one that reaches out ... I feel TURRIBLE about that but I just don't get the urge to hang out with people haha. I am her only in person friend so I should put more effort in there. We would go to 1-2 musicals every year before covid :) And my other friend finally lives closer to me (maybe 15-30 min drive) but shes a teacher in a pandemic. Soooo lol But she started doing art and we talk way more because of that. We were supposed to do a paint night either in person or virtual some time soon. Again shes the one always inviting me to do things. I love my friends and I hope they keep inviting me to do things LOL or else I will never see them. I should probably let them know haha.

You should totally let them know you appreciate them! I might, in that situation, feel like I was pressuring you to hang out with me, especially if you were my only in-person friend. Hearing that you appreciate my setting things up because you never think of it would make me really happy and encourage me to keep doing it. Just in case your friend is like me. ;) I don't think there's anything wrong with a friendship that's one-sided on the planning end as long as you are both cool with it being that way and the friendship itself isn't one-sided.

 

14 hours ago, Rookie said:

If you like being crafty (or just like crafty people) and enjoy crazy people you might enjoy GISH? "Global International Scavenger Hunt" its literally a community of nice crazy (sometimes crafty) people who have an obsession with Supernatural (the show) and helping people. Run by Misha Collins who played Castiel in the show. The main hunt is usually end of August or early September and they run a bunch of mini hunts through the year. You get put on a team and you choose tasks to do. Not all are crafty.. some are volunteering, doing a thing, doing nice things, there was an engineering one last time, puzzles, etc. 

I never saw more than a few episodes of Supernatural but I did enjoy what I saw. I'll Google it! Are you doing it?

 

14 hours ago, Scaly Freak said:

That's one of the good things about online interactions, in my mind - it is impossible to force a conversation to happen. Unlike in the non-internet world, where suddenly walking away from someone who is talking to me is considered rude, in a forum like this one, the option of not responding, or of not reading, if I don't want to participate, is ever-present and easy to act on. And no one but me decides if I will act on it or not. Sorry @juliebarkley.... you are just not that powerful ;) 

Point taken. And you have a gift for framing things in just the right way - both making a good point (more than one actually) and making me smile. :)

 

11 hours ago, Alanna said:

Like @Rookie said, this isn't the wrong place! Just different. As an analogy - if you were in a group of beginner fiddle students, you could get lots of song suggestions, bow-holding tips that worked for them, exercise books that they've liked, and commiseration regarding tricky parts in songs that take forever to learn. Those suggestions and shared experiences can be really helpful and also provide a lot of encouragement and moral support, but your skills will improve faster if you also have an expert fiddle instructor who can assign you homework and give you feedback on your technique :). After your lesson, you might still benefit from talking through what you learned with other students. Maybe you have a conversation about music theory with someone who plays piano, too, and share creativity and consistent practice tips with a painter. Different people will have different perspectives and supplement your structured classes.  (This is not me saying you need to talk to other people about music - I just thought it would be a more enjoyable example then something medical!)

 

Since text therapy is by nature a limited type of support and will still require a lot of self-motivation, I would definitely encourage you to continue seeking support and advice elsewhere, too :).

I freaking love this analogy! It is what I was really looking for in the first place - peer support from fellow travellers that I trusted. But I see your point that some more expert guidance could also be a good thing. (As indeed I finally have with my fiddling, lol.)

 

11 hours ago, Alanna said:

And like @Rookie and @Scaly Freak said, it's really not possible for you to demand anything from us via a computer screen (and if it is, we have bigger problems like the loss of free will 😅). You're not responsible for other people's decisions, reactions, or boundaries. 

Okay, okay, I get it! 😅 I will try to let go of the guilt.

 

10 hours ago, Mistr said:

I agree with @Alanna and @Scaly Freak, it is useful to get professional advice. Just like most people could use physical therapy when they pull a muscle, most people have some less-than-ideal thought pattern they picked up somewhere  along the way that could be improved.

True true! And it's probably a good thing that I've finally gotten to a point where I can recognize that and begin to solve it, right? Even if it makes me an awkward person right now because I'm so conscious of it.
 

Spoiler

 

10 hours ago, Mistr said:

I noticed over the last two years that none of the other people I know have reached out. I got to see people for activities - spinning group, aikido practice and video watching. No one just called to talk or suggested getting together. That is why I value conversations here so much. It feels easier to meet new people here than IRL.

This was the thing that sent me into my first deep downward spiral near the beginning of the pandemic. I was feeling a bit isolated, during the lockdown phase as a lot of us were, and I started reaching out to someone every day. Old friends, acquaintances, people I had been trying to get to know better, slightly more distant family. And I got so very few responses (maybe 10%?) it was disheartening. Then I realized that literally no one had reached out to me. No one. Even here, I sometimes send DMs to people I haven't seen in a bit, just as a check-in, but I don't think I've ever received one when I've disappeared (that may be a lie; I seem to recall getting at least one "hey, are you running a challenge this time around; I haven't seen it yet" message back in 2018). And I'm not going to spell out where that took my thoughts but it was a deep, dark, and very bad place that can still put me in tears if I think about it for more than a minute so I'll stop here. 😅

 

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19 minutes ago, juliebarkley said:

Quran: yes. Discovered that my app tracks both time and verses by week. My numbers are low, but I don't care. Stop trying to shame me, app. I'm doing better than before, and that's what matters. Quality over quantity.

 

This is especially important when connecting with a religious or spiritual tradition, even more when it's one that is personally important. For shame, app. For shame.

 

20 minutes ago, juliebarkley said:

True true! And it's probably a good thing that I've finally gotten to a point where I can recognize that and begin to solve it, right? Even if it makes me an awkward person right now because I'm so conscious of it.

 

Conscious Incompetence... the third of the four stages on the learning curve. You're much closer to your goal than you think. ;) 

 

Yes, that is a serious statement. You know what you want to change, you know how you want to chance it... you've done the difficult part.

 

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Reading Challenge Thread 2022

“I've always believed that failure is non-existent. What is failure? You go to the end of the season, then you lose the Super Bowl. Is that failing? To most people, maybe. But when you're picking apart why you failed, and now you're learning from that, then is that really failing? I don't think so." - Kobe Bryant, 1978-2020. Rest in peace, great warrior.

Personal Challenges, a.k.a.The Saga of Scaly Freak: Tutorial; Ch 1; Ch 2; Ch 3; Ch 4; Ch 5; Ch 6; Intermission; Intermission II; Ch 7; Ch 8; Ch 9; Ch 10; Ch 11; Ch 12 ; Ch 13; Ch 14Ch 15; Ch 16; Ch 17; Intermission IIICh 18; Ch 19; Ch 20; Ch 21; Ch 22; Ch 23; Ch 24; Ch 25; Intermission IV; Ch 26; Ch 27; Ch 28; Ch 29; Ch 30; Ch 31; Ch 32; Ch 33; Ch 34

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8 hours ago, juliebarkley said:

 The ones I'm doing are old folk classics - Oh Susanna, Clementine, and She'll be Coming 'Round the Mountain - My goal is to learn what I guess would be called "old-time" or Canadian folk fiddle.

Are those Canadian specific 😮 I just assumed they were North American. That would be cool if they were. I learnt all those when we did ukulele in grade 8!

Spoiler


8 hours ago, juliebarkley said:

You should totally let them know you appreciate them! I might, in that situation, feel like I was pressuring you to hang out with me, especially if you were my only in-person friend. Hearing that you appreciate my setting things up because you never think of it would make me really happy and encourage me to keep doing it. Just in case your friend is like me. ;) I don't think there's anything wrong with a friendship that's one-sided on the planning end as long as you are both cool with it being that way and the friendship itself isn't one-sided.

I shall tell them! :) Thanks. 

 

8 hours ago, juliebarkley said:

I never saw more than a few episodes of Supernatural but I did enjoy what I saw. I'll Google it! Are you doing it?

Hm I am not sure if I will do it this year ... but I say that every year and end up doing it lol. There's a group on Facebook called "The GISH Bunker" that you can kind of look at previous posts and its just a nice group to be in. I actually joined a team with someone who used to be on the forums here.... but shes in the States and I imagine my experience could be improved by finding a local group I could meet up with (which the app can help you find....but maybe not the best time during a pandemic haha). I will try to remember to remind you closer to the date :)

 

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13 hours ago, juliebarkley said:

  Missed this the first time; sorry! The ones I'm doing are old folk classics - Oh Susanna, Clementine, and She'll be Coming 'Round the Mountain - to play with someone else who is also practicing an instrument. My goal is to learn what I guess would be called "old-time" or Canadian folk fiddle. The Ottawa Valley has a strong tradition, as does Quebec, the Maritimes, and the Métis and some other indigenous groups. :)

 

 

No worries, you've had a lot to reply to! That's exciting that you have some duets lined up. I'll have to look into Canadian folk music - I'm familiar with some fiddle music from contra dancing and really enjoyed it. It would be nice to expand my library to new types of fiddle music!

 

13 hours ago, juliebarkley said:

I freaking love this analogy! It is what I was really looking for in the first place - peer support from fellow travellers that I trusted. But I see your point that some more expert guidance could also be a good thing. (As indeed I finally have with my fiddling, lol.)

 

 

I'm glad the comparison worked (and that you've found some resources for your fiddle practice as well!)

 

13 hours ago, juliebarkley said:
Spoiler

This was the thing that sent me into my first deep downward spiral near the beginning of the pandemic. I was feeling a bit isolated, during the lockdown phase as a lot of us were, and I started reaching out to someone every day. Old friends, acquaintances, people I had been trying to get to know better, slightly more distant family. And I got so very few responses (maybe 10%?) it was disheartening. Then I realized that literally no one had reached out to me. No one. Even here, I sometimes send DMs to people I haven't seen in a bit, just as a check-in, but I don't think I've ever received one when I've disappeared (that may be a lie; I seem to recall getting at least one "hey, are you running a challenge this time around; I haven't seen it yet" message back in 2018). And I'm not going to spell out where that took my thoughts but it was a deep, dark, and very bad place that can still put me in tears if I think about it for more than a minute so I'll stop here. 😅

 

Spoiler

My experiences with responses and people spontaneously reaching out have been similar (and I've been the non-responsive person sometimes). I think a lot of people suck at staying in touch when they don't see you in person, even when it comes to responding to messages that you sent. That's more a reflection of how much bandwidth they have for social interactions than their opinion of you, but I know it sucks. There's a very small handful of people that I've managed to stay in touch with remotely, and I ended up marrying one of them 😆

 

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Challenge 2.1, 2.2, 2.3, 2.4, 2.5  

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So, I don't really know what happened yesterday. Every time I looked at the clock, an hour or two had passed. I didn't start my supper until 8:30, and didn't finish it until well after midnight. Yet I did almost nothing that I can remember. Certainly nothing challenge-related. I have no idea where the time went. But today is a day off, so hopefully it will be both more productive and more memorable.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

On 1/12/2022 at 12:43 AM, Scaly Freak said:

This is especially important when connecting with a religious or spiritual tradition, even more when it's one that is personally important. For shame, app. For shame.

Right?! I have been reading until I hit something I want to sit with and think over. Then I stop. It does make the reading rather slow, but so what?

 

On 1/12/2022 at 12:43 AM, Scaly Freak said:

Conscious Incompetence... the third of the four stages on the learning curve. You're much closer to your goal than you think. ;) 

 

Yes, that is a serious statement. You know what you want to change, you know how you want to chance it... you've done the difficult part.

Lol, I feel like conscious incompetence is my permanent state. Either I know I know nothing about a thing, or I start learning and then quickly discover how much I don't know, cannot know, and will never know. This latter process never ends, even as you keep diving into a subject (especially as you keep diving into a subject). It is humbling, and makes life worth living. There is always more to learn.

 

I've started the difficult part. I'm not looking forward to the follow-through.

 

On 1/12/2022 at 9:21 AM, Rookie said:

Are those Canadian specific 😮 I just assumed they were North American. That would be cool if they were. I learnt all those when we did ukulele in grade 8!

22 hours ago, Alanna said:

I'll have to look into Canadian folk music - I'm familiar with some fiddle music from contra dancing and really enjoyed it. It would be nice to expand my library to new types of fiddle music!

Those ones are probably American actually. The book I've been learning from is very 'Merican. Canadian songs on the same so-traditional-all-children-know-them level might be  I'se the Bye, Land of the Silver Birch, Farewell to Nova Scotia, or My Paddle Keen and Bright. (I assume you know these ones, @Rookie! Tell me if I'm wrong.) The most famous Canadian folk fiddle tunes are probably Maple Sugar, Red River Jig, St. Anne's Reel, and Whiskey Before Breakfast.

 

On 1/12/2022 at 9:21 AM, Rookie said:

I will try to remember to remind you closer to the date :)

That would be awesome!
 

Spoiler

 

22 hours ago, Alanna said:

My experiences with responses and people spontaneously reaching out have been similar (and I've been the non-responsive person sometimes). I think a lot of people suck at staying in touch when they don't see you in person, even when it comes to responding to messages that you sent. That's more a reflection of how much bandwidth they have for social interactions than their opinion of you, but I know it sucks. There's a very small handful of people that I've managed to stay in touch with remotely, and I ended up marrying one of them 😆

 

So I've been told. And I've been the non-responsive person too. At the time though, all I knew was continuing to do what I was doing simply hurt me too much, and even after I stopped, the hurt still got worse. It was a well-intentioned idea that went very very wrong.

 

21 hours ago, Mistr said:

I am impressed by how you are making progress on all the various goals. I have had very little time to read, so that one stands out to me. Also fiddle practice. I could practice piano, but it clearly is not a priority for me right now. Learning fiddle is on my wish list for when I retire.

Thanks! The goals are short. It helps a lot. ;)

 

I get a lot of reading done on my breaks at work (though I'm not counting that for this challenge). I also have had times where almost the only reading that got done was whatever books I read while eating. It's one of the reasons I read a lot of non-fic; fiction generally requires immersion (short-chaptered thrillers maybe the exception), but non-fic often has convenient section breaks every page or so, making reading just a short piece whenever convenient much easier. I don't like reading fiction that way, so I find it way harder to work into the schedule. (I actually had my library books sorted this way for a while - books with long section divides requiring blocks of time, and ones with short sections suitable for mealtime reading. Guess which pile shrank the fastest.)

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56 minutes ago, juliebarkley said:

 

Those ones are probably American actually. The book I've been learning from is very 'Merican. Canadian songs on the same so-traditional-all-children-know-them level might be  I'se the Bye, Land of the Silver Birch, Farewell to Nova Scotia, or My Paddle Keen and Bright. (I assume you know these ones, @Rookie! Tell me if I'm wrong.) The most famous Canadian folk fiddle tunes are probably Maple Sugar, Red River Jig, St. Anne's Reel, and Whiskey Before Breakfast.

 

Please don't revoke my maple syrup card... but I don't know any of those! 😮 I will very soon though lol off to the youtube! 

 

@Happienumber, @obax, @TiogaGirl (I feel I am forgetting someone)

Canadians Assemble! Have you guys grown up knowing these traditional songs?

canadian flag fan GIF by MLB

 

Edit: Ok that was lovely :) I don't think I have listened to any of those before with knowing it. Some of the fiddle pieces I might have heard some before in the random history videos we used to have to watch or when I went to the old lumberjack camp/museum thing. But they could of just also been random old timey music.

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{Chase the wind and touch the sky; I will fly}

 

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36 minutes ago, juliebarkley said:

Lol, I feel like conscious incompetence is my permanent state. Either I know I know nothing about a thing, or I start learning and then quickly discover how much I don't know, cannot know, and will never know. This latter process never ends, even as you keep diving into a subject (especially as you keep diving into a subject). It is humbling, and makes life worth living. There is always more to learn.

 

To live is to learn, or somesuch. Yes.

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Reading Challenge Thread 2022

“I've always believed that failure is non-existent. What is failure? You go to the end of the season, then you lose the Super Bowl. Is that failing? To most people, maybe. But when you're picking apart why you failed, and now you're learning from that, then is that really failing? I don't think so." - Kobe Bryant, 1978-2020. Rest in peace, great warrior.

Personal Challenges, a.k.a.The Saga of Scaly Freak: Tutorial; Ch 1; Ch 2; Ch 3; Ch 4; Ch 5; Ch 6; Intermission; Intermission II; Ch 7; Ch 8; Ch 9; Ch 10; Ch 11; Ch 12 ; Ch 13; Ch 14Ch 15; Ch 16; Ch 17; Intermission IIICh 18; Ch 19; Ch 20; Ch 21; Ch 22; Ch 23; Ch 24; Ch 25; Intermission IV; Ch 26; Ch 27; Ch 28; Ch 29; Ch 30; Ch 31; Ch 32; Ch 33; Ch 34

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9 hours ago, Rookie said:

Please don't revoke my maple syrup card... but I don't know any of those! 😮 I will very soon though lol off to the youtube! 

 

@Happienumber, @obax, @TiogaGirl (I feel I am forgetting someone)

Canadians Assemble! Have you guys grown up knowing these traditional songs?

 

 

I only know the first 2. I know all the words to I'se the By thanks to Great Big Sea, and have been singing Land of the Silver Birch since I was a kid (I might actually know all the words to that too, if I think hard enough, it was one of my favourites). That's it, though, but I've never been all that great at being a Canadian (I don't especially like maple syrup and I rarely apologize...)

 

Edit: Lies! I know the Paddle song too, or at least I've heard it before, but didn't remember until I actually listened to it. I feel like we sang songs like that in elementary school at some point, I'm going to assume when we were learning Canadian history type stuff in Grade 3 where we learned about Indigenous  peoples and pioneers. Is it weird that I have a very distinct memory from then of making log cabins out of popcicle sticks and mini milk cartons? Mine was a chocolate milk carton that I drank myself during pizza day then rinsed out for the cabin. I do not remember what the end result looked like, but I'm going to assume it probably looked like an 8 year old's version of a model log cabin.

 

Edit 2: this got me thinking about my childhood and I remembered where I knew the Silver Birch and Paddle songs from! It didn't make sense that it was just from grade 3, and I don't remember my mom singing either in particular, but Fred Penner has a version where he combines the two and I'm certain I listened to it on the vinyl version of repeat when I was little.

 

https://open.spotify.com/track/4K2CXvDR5hHKkVxpxdp83m?si=j-xaUk4zTiePxWLwCbvp0Q&utm_source=copy-link

 

 

 

 

 

 

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10 hours ago, Rookie said:

Please don't revoke my maple syrup card... but I don't know any of those! 😮 I will very soon though lol off to the youtube! 

The shock I feel! The horror! Toronto/South Ontario really is another country, I swear. :P At least you are setting it right.

 

10 hours ago, Scaly Freak said:

 

To live is to learn, or somesuch. Yes.

"The more I read, the more I acquire, the more certain I am that I know nothing."

 

(Note to self: read more Voltaire. He is badass awesome.)

  

1 hour ago, obax said:

I only know the first 2. I know all the words to I'se the By thanks to Great Big Sea, and have been singing Land of the Silver Birch since I was a kid (I might actually know all the words to that too, if I think hard enough, it was one of my favourites). That's it, though, but I've never been all that great at being a Canadian (I don't especially like maple syrup and I rarely apologize...)

 

Edit: Lies! I know the Paddle song too, or at least I've heard it before, but didn't remember until I actually listened to it. I feel like we sang songs like that in elementary school at some point, I'm going to assume when we were learning Canadian history type stuff in Grade 3 where we learned about Indigenous  peoples and pioneers. Is it weird that I have a very distinct memory from then of making log cabins out of popcicle sticks and mini milk cartons? Mine was a chocolate milk carton that I drank myself during pizza day then rinsed out for the cabin. I do not remember what the end result looked like, but I'm going to assume it probably looked like an 8 year old's version of a model log cabin

Three out of four ain't bad, especially when the fourth was one I was hesitant to include. Land of the Silver Birch is one of my favourite too - it's hauntingly beautiful when well-sung in parts. There are no really good versions on YouTube though, and for some reason there are SO MANY videos that mix up the titles of My Paddle Keen and Bright and Land of the Silver Birch. They are not at all the same song, YouTube. I remember burning a lot of time trying to find good versions of these when I did my fiddle music challenge in (I think) January 2020.

 

I swear I remember building something like that too.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Habits

Exercise: not yet. After this post.

Reading: yes. This time a shortish chapter on introductory material.

Quran: yes. Actually played into the "knowledge and wisdom bring humility rather than arrogant certainty" theme, by my understanding anyway. Also a conversation had elsewhere about how two people can look at the same facts and come to different conclusions. Always super cool when your recent thoughts show up on the page like that.

Prayer: yes. 

Fiddle: not yet. Will also be after this post. Disappointed but not surprised that no one is doing anything in person and some of the tutors have quit giving lessons or taking new students. I'm just not sure what I want to have checked can be done effectively over the internet.

Duo: yes.

 

Tasks

Wrote my investment plan. Ordered some buttons so that I can get my booth up and get to work. Added a Druid tag to my challenge because once again mental health has been a big topic, though it wasn't meant to be. Delegated chasing up some old British bank accounts to my son, since he's there right now and it's been such a PITA to do from here that I haven't done it for a decade. Beat my son, my ex, and his two other kids at a game they play hardcore and I have played twice. (Sweet sweet victory it was.) A good day.

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Habits

Exercise: yes. Some stretching. Minor cat participation by two different felines. 

Reading: yes. More on the front and back matter. This chapter felt like he was writing to a first-year college student - take note of the stuff on the copyright page so you can source, what are foot/endnotes, how you can sometimes read a work's political lean by browsing its bibliography (but that this doesn't necessarily discount anything in it, it's just good to be aware of). I really hope he moves on to dealing with the content soon, because I know what the parts of a book are and why they are there, and I know that an article's title can suggest its conclusion (or that they can be extremely misleading; a particular pet peeve of mine when so many people read only headlines shared on social media, ugh). Otherwise this book is not going to be what I was hoping for.

Quran: yes.

Prayer: yes. The Quran reading handed me a prayer right in the text, which made continuing with gratitudes super easy.

Fiddle: yes. I've been playing with speed for the last two sessions. I also found a fiddle book I haven't tried yet and played a (very easy and short) tune from it.

Duo: yes.

 

Tasks

Rolled reviewing my homeschool personal finance material. I have a pile that I've collected that needs review, because I was waiting for one of the subjects we are doing to be finished up so that I'm not making the workload unmanageable, but we picked up an online course and made a few other digressions, and it hasn't happened yet. But I know he's excited about doing it, and it's important to learn, so hopefully soon. I had a book show up on my library holds shelf that I thought might be good, so I started to read it today. Five pages in and I'm already bored, and this is a topic I'm usually pretty keen on. I'll skim it to see if he suggests any topics to add to my list, or has any good ideas for approaches or activities, but there's no way I'm using this book as assigned reading or similar. Ah well. Eliminating possible material is still progress.

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5 minutes ago, juliebarkley said:

Reading: yes. More on the front and back matter. This chapter felt like he was writing to a first-year college student - take note of the stuff on the copyright page so you can source, what are foot/endnotes, how you can sometimes read a work's political lean by browsing its bibliography (but that this doesn't necessarily discount anything in it, it's just good to be aware of). I really hope he moves on to dealing with the content soon, because I know what the parts of a book are and why they are there, and I know that an article's title can suggest its conclusion (or that they can be extremely misleading; a particular pet peeve of mine when so many people read only headlines shared on social media, ugh). Otherwise this book is not going to be what I was hoping for.

 

Now I'm glad I waited for your thoughts on the book before searching for it for myself. I look forward to hearing more as up progress through the book.

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Reading Challenge Thread 2022

“I've always believed that failure is non-existent. What is failure? You go to the end of the season, then you lose the Super Bowl. Is that failing? To most people, maybe. But when you're picking apart why you failed, and now you're learning from that, then is that really failing? I don't think so." - Kobe Bryant, 1978-2020. Rest in peace, great warrior.

Personal Challenges, a.k.a.The Saga of Scaly Freak: Tutorial; Ch 1; Ch 2; Ch 3; Ch 4; Ch 5; Ch 6; Intermission; Intermission II; Ch 7; Ch 8; Ch 9; Ch 10; Ch 11; Ch 12 ; Ch 13; Ch 14Ch 15; Ch 16; Ch 17; Intermission IIICh 18; Ch 19; Ch 20; Ch 21; Ch 22; Ch 23; Ch 24; Ch 25; Intermission IV; Ch 26; Ch 27; Ch 28; Ch 29; Ch 30; Ch 31; Ch 32; Ch 33; Ch 34

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On 1/13/2022 at 5:52 PM, juliebarkley said:

Those ones are probably American actually. The book I've been learning from is very 'Merican. Canadian songs on the same so-traditional-all-children-know-them level might be  I'se the Bye, Land of the Silver Birch, Farewell to Nova Scotia, or My Paddle Keen and Bright. (I assume you know these ones, @Rookie! Tell me if I'm wrong.) The most famous Canadian folk fiddle tunes are probably Maple Sugar, Red River Jig, St. Anne's Reel, and Whiskey Before Breakfast.

 

Thank you for these - I'm slowly working my way through them and enjoying them! Some of them are very similar to contra dance tunes, which is very nostalgic for me :) 

 

2 hours ago, juliebarkley said:

Rolled reviewing my homeschool personal finance material.

 

This is such an important topic - it's great that you're adding it to his curriculum. In case it helps, I've heard You Need A Budget (https://www.youneedabudget.com/free-workshops/) frequently recommended. The Canadian personal finance subreddit also has some Canadian-specific recommended reading for more advanced topics like investing.

 

 

2 hours ago, juliebarkley said:

Exercise: yes. Some stretching. Minor cat participation by two different felines. 

 

 

Best Friends Yoga GIF by Best Friends Animal Society

 

You're doing fantastic with all of your goals! 

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22 hours ago, Scaly Freak said:

Now I'm glad I waited for your thoughts on the book before searching for it for myself. I look forward to hearing more as up progress through the book.

Well, now that two people are thinking of reading this one, I will definitely keep up the comments! :D

 

20 hours ago, Alanna said:

Thank you for these - I'm slowly working my way through them and enjoying them! Some of them are very similar to contra dance tunes, which is very nostalgic for me :) 

Probably not too surprising - traditional fiddle is all about the dancing. :) Do you still contra?

 

20 hours ago, Alanna said:

This is such an important topic - it's great that you're adding it to his curriculum. In case it helps, I've heard You Need A Budget (https://www.youneedabudget.com/free-workshops/) frequently recommended. The Canadian personal finance subreddit also has some Canadian-specific recommended reading for more advanced topics like investing.

Ooh, I never thought to look at YNAB for information. Thanks! I checked out the second list and I know those names. I may have more than a passing familiarity with the literature on this topic. 😅 They are all promoting a very similar strategy for investing (not a bad one, but just not a ton of difference between them). They really are more focused on the saving and investing end of things though, and we need to do a bit more foundational stuff: needs vs wants, budgeting, what are stocks/ETFs/REITs/RRSPs/TFSAs, what is risk and why does every choice you make with your money carry it, what is opportunity cost, what is compound interest and how does it work for/against you, etc. And also that money and material things aren't the purpose of life; the things that really give your life meaning and joy are seldom things that money will buy you. I have a long list.😅 Plus he already knows some things - he has run more than one successful business before - and he's, like me, a natural saver, so as always we will shift the emphasis as needed.

 

My absolute favourite personal finance book is Your Money or Your Life, which is more about an approach to life than the nuts and bolts of investment selection. I have also gotten value from some of Robert Kiyosaki's stuff, though I know he's a bit controversial. Canadian MoneySaver is a fantastic magazine if you do primarily dividend investing. And lots of others. (Sadly, the Canadian personal finance subreddit is a nasty place and I cannot in good faith recommend it.)

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Habits

Exercise: no. My heels are killing me and I would like to give them a chance to heal. Even standing normally is putting the skin under strain and risking reopening the wounds.

Reading: yes. Finally! A chapter on bias and a few techniques for identifying it in a writer. More applicable to articles than books, but still. Two things that weren't included that I wish had been. The author hinted only indirectly, but I really wish he had made explicit, that bias gets easier to spot the further the writer's bias is from your own (as are the argument's flaws, omissions, etc.), so the techniques come in most handy when you don't feel the bias jumping off the page. Also, one very useful technique (who is quoted and are they framed favourably or not?) does depend on a certain amount of subject knowledge (ie. that you know who the quoted people are and what their own lean is likely to be). He sort of omitted the "figure out who these people are" part of that technique. This is less important if you can identify the bias anyway, such as if the article states that it is quoting a PETA supporter and you can gauge from the word choice what the author think of them, but very important if the sources aren't helpfully flagged in the text as PETA supporters or similar, or if you know nothing about the topic. Maybe this will be covered later though.

 

(True story: I got sick of my local newspaper's coverage of one particular issue a few years back when they kept quoting an organization with an authoritative-sounding name as their main, sometimes only, source. I knew from my personal interests that the organization had perhaps a dozen members and was a front for one individual whose views were very much a minority in his community. There are a lot of similar front organizations for other issues; I try to check out unfamiliar organizations now when I'm invested, just to make sure. Occasionally the googling turns up interesting things.)

Quran: yes.

Prayer: yes. 

Fiddle: not yet. Going to keep looking at the new book.

Duo: yes.

 

Tasks

My rolls were toying with me today. First I rolled my CON walk-across-Ottawa plan, but it is too far in the future to be planning the finer details now. Rolled again, and got fiddle tutor. I suppose I could make a decision about that, but it seems wise to wait a little until the Omi wave dies down. Unless... more experienced music folks, do you think that a basic hand position/bow hold checkup could be done well by online lessons? I feel like it's more suited to the step above that and beyond, but I'm not a music teacher, haven't been to a lesson since piano in my long-ago childhood, and they've had like a whole year to get good at online teaching. My gut could be very wrong here.

 

My final roll was to work on my VO website. I can't realistically record right now so that was also a bit 🙄, but at least I can put a little effort into it. Probably not too much. Then I'll start working through the GIANT PILE OF PAPERWORK that I found while looking for the bank account info I delegated. I DO NOT want to move this crap again.

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7 minutes ago, juliebarkley said:

more experienced music folks, do you think that a basic hand position/bow hold checkup could be done well by online lessons?

 

If there is a webcam involved, yes. You'd have to be able to go close and turn, or have someone move the camera around so the other party can see your hand positions from different angles, but I don't see why it can't be done, with some creativity and effort.

Reading Challenge Thread 2022

“I've always believed that failure is non-existent. What is failure? You go to the end of the season, then you lose the Super Bowl. Is that failing? To most people, maybe. But when you're picking apart why you failed, and now you're learning from that, then is that really failing? I don't think so." - Kobe Bryant, 1978-2020. Rest in peace, great warrior.

Personal Challenges, a.k.a.The Saga of Scaly Freak: Tutorial; Ch 1; Ch 2; Ch 3; Ch 4; Ch 5; Ch 6; Intermission; Intermission II; Ch 7; Ch 8; Ch 9; Ch 10; Ch 11; Ch 12 ; Ch 13; Ch 14Ch 15; Ch 16; Ch 17; Intermission IIICh 18; Ch 19; Ch 20; Ch 21; Ch 22; Ch 23; Ch 24; Ch 25; Intermission IV; Ch 26; Ch 27; Ch 28; Ch 29; Ch 30; Ch 31; Ch 32; Ch 33; Ch 34

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5 hours ago, juliebarkley said:

Probably not too surprising - traditional fiddle is all about the dancing. :) Do you still contra?

 

I was very involved in the community as an undergrad, but haven't contra danced since I moved to the UK - there isn't any near me. It's also probably one of the worst activities from a COVID perspective, so it will be a while before I'd be comfortable going to a dance - it could also be referred to as "let's systematically touch everyone in your line and face them from less than 1 m away" 😂

 

5 hours ago, juliebarkley said:

Ooh, I never thought to look at YNAB for information. Thanks! I checked out the second list and I know those names. I may have more than a passing familiarity with the literature on this topic. 😅 They are all promoting a very similar strategy for investing (not a bad one, but just not a ton of difference between them). They really are more focused on the saving and investing end of things though, and we need to do a bit more foundational stuff: needs vs wants, budgeting, what are stocks/ETFs/REITs/RRSPs/TFSAs, what is risk and why does every choice you make with your money carry it, what is opportunity cost, what is compound interest and how does it work for/against you, etc. And also that money and material things aren't the purpose of life; the things that really give your life meaning and joy are seldom things that money will buy you. I have a long list.😅 Plus he already knows some things - he has run more than one successful business before - and he's, like me, a natural saver, so as always we will shift the emphasis as needed.

 

Yeah, they seemed to mostly be focused on passive investing from the titles. You do have a great idea already of what you want to cover - if you can't find anything, maybe you could write a book!

 

I'm interested in how you plan to cover topics like housing (e.g., renting and buying a house) - I've seen a lot of recent news about how prices in Canadian cities are skyrocketing (like in many other places) and most of the younger generation of homebuyers is getting priced out. Maybe this particular aspect isn't relevant to your son, but I'm curious what your thoughts are on it?

 

5 hours ago, juliebarkley said:

My absolute favourite personal finance book is Your Money or Your Life, which is more about an approach to life than the nuts and bolts of investment selection. I have also gotten value from some of Robert Kiyosaki's stuff, though I know he's a bit controversial. Canadian MoneySaver is a fantastic magazine if you do primarily dividend investing. And lots of others. (Sadly, the Canadian personal finance subreddit is a nasty place and I cannot in good faith recommend it.)

I will take a look at that book :). Shame that the subreddit isn't friendly - I've only lurked in the UK one (I figured the Canadian resources would be more relevant to you!), but they seem to be supportive. E.g., there are some people who will add caveats/apologies like "I know I don't have a lot of savings compared to most of the people on this forum" to their post, and someone will remind them that the sub posters heavily skews towards people who are either getting out of a lot of debt or have more money than they know what to do with!

 

 

Great job with your challenge, and I hope you can find a good virtual fiddle teacher!

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11 hours ago, Scaly Freak said:

If there is a webcam involved, yes. You'd have to be able to go close and turn, or have someone move the camera around so the other party can see your hand positions from different angles, but I don't see why it can't be done, with some creativity and effort.

There surely would be a webcam involved. Okay, maybe I'll get back to the one place that does virtual lessons then. They said they do a free 25 minute consult, which would probably be enough to figure out if it works for me. And if online works, there's no reason to stick to local people either (a good thing, since New Town doesn't have a local teacher that I could find). Thanks!

 

5 hours ago, Alanna said:

Yeah, they seemed to mostly be focused on passive investing from the titles. You do have a great idea already of what you want to cover - if you can't find anything, maybe you could write a book!

Heh, yeah, I have a pretty good idea of what I want to cover. I'm frustrated with the homeschool materials available. They're almost all religious, even from otherwise secular curriculum publishers. This puzzles me a bit - it is not normally this hard to find good non-religious curriculum. Could also be because the topic is short shrifted in schools, so there aren't a ton of resources out there to borrow and repurpose. I have McGill Personal Finance and a bunch of adult-targeted books to pull things from, and like two homeschool resources I haven't checked out yet.

 

5 hours ago, Alanna said:

I'm interested in how you plan to cover topics like housing (e.g., renting and buying a house) - I've seen a lot of recent news about how prices in Canadian cities are skyrocketing (like in many other places) and most of the younger generation of homebuyers is getting priced out. Maybe this particular aspect isn't relevant to your son, but I'm curious what your thoughts are on it?

This is a topic I could happily rant about for a long time, but I will do my best to refrain. ;) For the last, oh, 18 years or so, Canadian housing prices have risen significantly faster than both inflation and rents (which have also outgrown inflation, just not quite as extremely). There are reasons for this and like most things, it's complicated. It's not sustainable long-term, but who knows when or how it will end. I personally would not buy into this market right now, for reasons. But just in general, both renting and buying have their own benefits and drawbacks. Neither is intrinsically better than the other; it really depends on your goals. I do think there is too much social pressure on people to buy because renting is "inferior", but especially when you are young, the drawbacks of buying (tieing up a lot of your cash in one asset, restricting your mobility, increasing your fixed living costs) far outweigh the benefits in my opinion.

 

5 hours ago, Alanna said:

I will take a look at that book :). Shame that the subreddit isn't friendly - I've only lurked in the UK one (I figured the Canadian resources would be more relevant to you!), but they seem to be supportive. E.g., there are some people who will add caveats/apologies like "I know I don't have a lot of savings compared to most of the people on this forum" to their post, and someone will remind them that the sub posters heavily skews towards people who are either getting out of a lot of debt or have more money than they know what to do with!

Yeah, I like Reddit in general and most subs I have been on are really good sources of information - I actually target Reddit with google searches pretty often when I have specific questions to answer. The Canadian personal finance one unfortunately has a lot of people who just want to insult people, especially beginners. And not friendly insult banter or tough love either, but plain meanness. :(

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