[Chesire]

How about a new beginning.  The hard start is below, but let's change the vibe a little.

 

 

Gonna focus on what I have and what I can do. 

 

My parents have been amazing letting us stay in their house, especially while they are snowbirding.  But that means I get to have an unplanned Christmas with my parents again when they come back for the holidays!  Gonna try to talk mom into making cookies this year.  And tree trimming will be shared (my dad and my husband help, but only to be nice not because they really like it) 

 

We should have the house cleaned and ready for when they get here so they can just settle into to celebrate-mode.  I took down many, many wall-feet of wallpaper in lieu of rent since I knew it was the ugliest task on their to-do list.  (Also the manual work helped me since I do most of my quality meditation type thinking while doing mindless tasks. win-win).  I need to make a proper list and time line for what we can get done in 9 days.

 

The things I can do include respecting my brain and body needs by eating well-ish, getting in movement, and focusing on cans not can'ts.  

 

Same goals as below, but if you want to skip down about 3 posts and miss out on some sad venting, feel free

 

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This is mostly a place holder to fill in later, but I need to put something in writing.  Basically my life was stomped into the mud a few weeks ago.  I'm not a huge fan of sobbing on a regular basis, but 🤞the worst is behind us.  All that is just to say I'm sticking with good foundation work this time.  

 

1 Get out to walk/run before work minimum 3 times per week

2 Mostly eat at home and mostly quality food. 

3 Focus on quatliy sleep, which involves alcohol limiting because that so heavily impacts my sleep.

 

That's it.  I'll add further thoughts as I have time and inclination. 

 

4! almost forgot.  be present here min 2 times per week

 

[Qnobi]

Following 🙂 — here’s to a smoother holiday season!

[Chesire]

And apparently my cat disappeared, we haven't seen any sign of him all day.  Given he is a mouthy one and his food is untouched, I think he made his escape during a midnight dog outing, presumably he decided it was his time to go.  He was 19 yo, so reasonable decision.  I just feel kind of like I'm flapping loose here since I have no real closure.  And with the cold night and his lack of outdoor experience.....  sigh

[Chesire]

New start here (noted for myself mostly)

 

I successfully got out 4 mornings so far this week for walk/run time.  Haven't really felt like doing strength work but at least I'm not being full slug.  Cleaned up the living room and put the tree up.  Will spend some time today picking up the clutter that MrC and I are terrible about leaving on flat surfaces. 

 

MrC is still struggling with the job loss and the fact that he had wrapped up so much of his personal value in his ability to support us, but he's definitely made some progress.  And he has started to work on the fact that his primary outlet for frustration was me.  Basically if something caused him to see something in himself he didn't like he would externalize those feelings with raised voice or lashing out at the nearest thing, which is me of course.  But I was finally able to show him what he was doing clearly.  Now I can ask 'are you upset with you or me?' and he pauses to reflect.  This is a long way of saying healing is happening.  Also we got our replacement health insurance set up so hopefully he can talk to his therapist again soon!

 

Maybe I'll try making bread again today.  That sounds comforting.  and tasty. 

[Qnobi]

I have some experience with displaced anger — that’s hard for everyone. I hope the progress around owning the emotion lifts the whole household.  One of my loving-kindness books has a technique of breathing in the bad (as a way of owning it, not absorbing it), and breathing out the good (May you be safe, healthy, happy, live with ease). There’s is a lot of power in wishing for another’s safety as opposed to our own relief. Sending good vibes to a fellow healer!

[Chesire]

Bread did not happen Friday, but it did on Saturday.  Gluten free baking is a weird creature.  (I'm not GF but my mom is Celiac and this is her kitchen and I was hoping to have a go to recipe for when they get back in a week.)   I don't know what's up, but after reading America's Test Kitchen GF stuff, I think there isn't enough yeast in the recipe I was following.  Or I mixed up the quantities of some of the ingredients.  I know the latter happened but I just went ahead because I could get rid of it and definitely not have bread, or I could just wing it and maybe have something edible.  It was decent, but gummy, and I know why.  I still think there wasn't enough yeast since twice the bread didn't rise well.  New plan; try ATK recipe.  This is tough for me.  I'm NOT baker, I'm a better cook.  Baking is science, cooking is a bit more freeform.  (always follow the recipe exactly the first time, then adapt as you want, unless you are already a practiced cook).  So, uh, talk food to me. 

 

Any nerd who gets this far down and sees this; if you have some regional or family or cultural recipes to share, I would be eternally grateful.  Every Thurs since my mom was diagnosed (about 20 years worth now!) my parents, a few close friends, a rotating bunch of awesome people, husband, and have dinner together where we try a new recipe, with few repeats.  It started as exploration for life without gluten, now it's an exploration for all the awesome foods.  Food is a celebration and searching for new things has led us to learn a lot about other cultures. 

 

Anyway.  I think I've finally recovered from (mild) Covid in May.  I'm able to consistently and easily run four miles, even when just about freezing out there.

 

Whatelse.  Guinness, the cat, still isn't back.  He was old, has had a few strokes that I know of, and had a type of skin condition for which the vet didn't use the word cancer, but dot dot dot.  I've accepted his choice.  Also it's been such a crap-tastic year that my emotional reserves are low, so maybe down the road I will grieve more.

 

MrC and I were able to do a lot of cleaning the last few days.  There is still a fair bit to do, ugh mopping, but much  better.  And a lot of the Christmas decorations are up.  Still holding off on the tree for mom's return.   And I warned her there will be at least two type of cookies this year.  Just cuz.

 

Not a shabby start to the challenge!

 

still working on the new vibe, though vv this vv one is slightly demonic but still quality vibe

 

[Chesire]

Thanks to Emissary2Ornj for reminding me about GMB Elements!  Their youtube video about challenging yourself with basic movements re-lit the flame.  I bought it last year, but last year apparently wasn't the right time for me to use it.  I'll revisit it soon.  Maybe not this challenge but at least in the new year. 

[Asha Phoenix]

The bread making sounds exciting! I haven't tried making GF bread, but my mom has recently started making bread again, so I see some bread making in the near future over here! I started a couple bread starters yesterday (An Amish Friendship bread and a Sourdough). Hoping they turn out okay.

[Loveable_Bouncer]

The one thing about GF baking is have a combination of flours if you  go all in. I have read some many recipes of yummy treats that have brought this up. However, a friend of mine that is GF that goes "yeah in what world would I have the space..." She is also a hardcore baker for our office soo I get it... lol. 

 

I only have tater tot hotdish recipe that is specifically regional, but IDK if tater tots are safe for GF (have had other diest restrictions when I have gone GF in the past). 

 

Here with support now! Thank you for being there for me, and now here to return it. 

Sorry for the missing of your cat, and the loss of closure. 

 

Also understand the uncovering of surfaces... the freedom I love of covering every surface after moving out is also my kryptonite. Hope the cleaning projects get done in time for your parents along with taking care of yourself!

[Chesire]

On 12/7/2022 at 9:08 PM, Loveable_Bouncer said:

I only have tater tot hotdish recipe that is specifically regional, but IDK if tater tots are safe for GF (have had other diest restrictions when I have gone GF in the past).

This sounds amazing and maybe once they fly off south again I'll make it for my own delight!

 

Yeah, baking in general is certainly a science, but I'm thinking GF baking teeters on the edge of alchemy.  What proper melding of crazy ingredients will transform into the golden loaf? 

 

It's been a good week.  I was able to do most of the food and exercise stuff I wanted to get done.  Seriously, batch cooking and prepping lunch is key for me.  I managed to get a hair cut.  Had a good week at work.  Managed to have dry nights as planned.  Recaps definitely show me the positives; its too damn easy to get lost in the difficulties.

 

We have a plan to get the last of the clutter dealt with around here and have a dinner plan for arrival day.  I'm feeling like this will be a decent weekend.  Though I'm about to go out for my first truly below freezing run, 24°F/-4C.  So many layers make it a more difficult run.  Oh well, hot coffee at the end. 

 

Thanks, y'all, nerds are awesome.

[Loveable_Bouncer]

On 12/10/2022 at 6:37 AM, Chesire said:

This sounds amazing and maybe once they fly off south again I'll make it for my own delight!

Look forward to sharing.! Was hoping to make it sooner than later to myself to start adjusting the recipe, but I seem to have no problem filling my fridge with other things. 

On 12/10/2022 at 6:37 AM, Chesire said:

It's been a good week.  I was able to do most of the food and exercise stuff I wanted to get done.  Seriously, batch cooking and prepping lunch is key for me.  I managed to get a hair cut.  Had a good week at work.  Managed to have dry nights as planned.  Recaps definitely show me the positives; its too damn easy to get lost in the difficulties.

Yay for an awesome week!

 

On 12/10/2022 at 6:37 AM, Chesire said:

Though I'm about to go out for my first truly below freezing run, 24°F/-4C.  So many layers make it a more difficult run.  Oh well, hot coffee at the end. 

Why???

*cough* I mean... 

How was it? Was the coffee hot enough to warm you up? 

[Chesire]

19 hours ago, Loveable_Bouncer said:

Why???

*cough* I mean... 

How was it? Was the coffee hot enough to warm you up? 

I don't know.  haha!  The run itself is usually fine, it's the beginning and the end where the cold usually gets me.  And a warm shower helped a lot oo

[Chesire]

It's been a pretty good week.  I did a few runs and a few days of Elements.  Elements is interesting in that since it is so focused on all the little portions of any given movement I've noticed things I wasn't fully aware of, such as I definitely have some movement limitation in one wrist that's the result of a bad break about 40 years ago.  Also, crap that number was rough to write out!  🤣  But these things, both the age and the wrist, are things I just get to learn how to work with.

[Chesire]

Well, the vibe change helped things, but dang this was a short challenge.  Here we are at the end and I did exactly what I hoped to do.  I did get some exercise in; chilly morning running and Elements which is really such a mental workout! 

 

Mom and I did try a GF bread which turned out surprisingly good.  Not too grainy, decent flavor, good body, just a little crumbly.  We also got some good cookie making in, not only GF but also dairy free for an allergic niece.  Haven't made cookies in years, so it's been fun.

 

Now to spend some good family and chosen family time, eating and playing games, then on to spending some quality time with me planning the next year and the next challenge.

 

See you all soon!