Jump to content

[Trashcan Carla] Chapter 1 - Contemplation and Consistency


Recommended Posts

So, I'm feeling much better today and am doubting my choices of things to focus on less. The truth is, I actually am being more accountable to myself by engaging with you all about what I've done or not done. Sure, I have been a little lax on goal number one - exercise - but I can always ramp that up. I'm going to keep doing what I'm doing prioritizing my spiritual/meditative efforts and no alcohol thing. After we get a baby gate installed for the doggie to NOT vex me by trying to go upstairs every few minutes, I can try to do some workouts in the morning before Odin and my husband wake.

 

I'm thinking that I can try again today to do some more intense exercise with Odin and Molly running around my feet and bonking into me. As long as I don't have to get down on the ground (Molly will just jump on me and doggie kiss me too much - adorable but...), it should be good. Maybe a cardio dance workout? Let's see if I can fit that into my day today. I definitely need to go out with the kids for a walk today. They didn't get out yesterday, and that ain't right.

 

I just remembered that Mom 2 aka mom-in-law is coming on Saturday afternoon and I don't want to have all of my cleaning take place on Saturday morning.

OMG! Speaking of Mom 2 - I just remembered that today is Mom 1's birthday (the OG mom)! Where is my head at? And my son's birthday is coming up very soon. I am SO unprepared.

 

Today:

- order cake for Odie's birthday

- send e-gift card to Momma for her birthday

- dishes

- make an effort to at least try the dance cardio DVD I have

- put away stuff that's crowding kitchen and dining area

- laundry away!

- take Odie and Molly for a walk

- writer's group Zoom

- prep for tomorrow evening's event

- figure out what we are going to do for Odie's birthday

- buy Odie a present or two

- make dinner

- take a moment to breathe and make art

 

 

 

Looking at my list and feeling a bit overwhelmed. SIGH. Okay. It's only 7am. Let's get this day going!

 

  • Like 2

Current NF Challenge: X

“Stay afraid, but do it anyway. What’s important is the action. You don’t have to wait to be confident. Just do it and eventually the confidence will follow.” Carrie Fisher

Link to comment

Heading toward the end of the day. It's been an okay day, but my instincts about my list being a wee bit long were spot on. Actually, is been better than okay - it's been a pretty good day.

 

I had a great conversation with my writer's group pals via Zoom and we did a few writing prompts that were actually rather productive in giving me ideas to work with for future projects. It's always great to see their faces! Also they're wonderful supportive and that's amazing. Our group has been together for almost 2 years... My how time flies.

 

 

Today:

- order cake for Odie's birthday

- send e-gift card to Momma for her birthday

- dishes

- make an effort to at least try the dance cardio DVD I have

- put away stuff that's crowding kitchen and dining area

- laundry away!

- take Odie and Molly for a walk

- writer's group Zoom

- prep for tomorrow evening's event

- figure out what we are going to do for Odie's birthday

- buy Odie a present or two

- make dinner

- take a moment to breathe and make art

 

Wish that I had drawn something but hey-ho. I am feeling fairly relaxed now though. Drinking tea from my Haunted Mansion mug and about to CBD gummy.

 

Tomorrow is another day to work on the undone things.

  • Like 4

Current NF Challenge: X

“Stay afraid, but do it anyway. What’s important is the action. You don’t have to wait to be confident. Just do it and eventually the confidence will follow.” Carrie Fisher

Link to comment
On 1/19/2023 at 4:27 PM, TrashcanCarla said:

So, I'm feeling much better today and am doubting my choices of things to focus on less. The truth is, I actually am being more accountable to myself by engaging with you all about what I've done or not done.

 

Yes! If you share the failures, they are no longer failures but successful reflection. It's data. For a better spaceship.

 

On 1/19/2023 at 4:27 PM, TrashcanCarla said:

I'm going to keep doing what I'm doing prioritizing my spiritual/meditative efforts and no alcohol thing.

 

This is amazing all by itself.

  • Like 1
  • Thanks 1

Let cheese and oxen and mead crowd out our secret desires for power and domination - Harriet the Viking

Just be bold, fluid and unapologetic, not small, hairy and indecisive - Harriet the Artist

You can absorb me! - Harriet the Contextless Guru

Link to comment
On 1/18/2023 at 12:09 PM, Harriet said:

If we give the sapling rocket fuel, it will grow too fast and too thin and we'll cheer for a moment as it appears to touch the sun, but then it will buckle under its own weight.

 

That, or explode into fiery splinters. 

 

On 1/18/2023 at 12:09 PM, Harriet said:

I always think I should be doing more, then I crash and spiral out of control. I'm trying something different, building up slowly on what I hope are firmer if more modest foundations. Hence organic programming.

This.

  • Like 2

"When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it." -Henry Ford

"The older I get, the more I understand that the only way to say valuable things is to lose your fear of being correct." -Malcolm Gladwell

"If you know the way broadly, you will see it in all things." -Miyamoto Musashi

Link to comment
19 hours ago, TrashcanCarla said:

My how time flies

Time flies like the wind. Fruit flies like bananas.

  • Like 1
  • Haha 2

"When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it." -Henry Ford

"The older I get, the more I understand that the only way to say valuable things is to lose your fear of being correct." -Malcolm Gladwell

"If you know the way broadly, you will see it in all things." -Miyamoto Musashi

Link to comment
2 hours ago, Salinger said:

Hey TC, what are your plans today? xx

 

Good day!

 

My mom-in-law is coming to our house to stay for a few nights starting at about 2pm today, so I've got some readying to do. She's a pretty easy-going guest, but I still want to make sure that we're presentable for her and provide a comfortable room for her to go to. I'm going to need to be really "on it" this morning. Focused. Ignore that I'm tired and lack motivation.

 

To-Do (all before 2pm lol!):

- clean toilets, Trixie's tray

- vacuum upstairs

- launder guest linens and put on guest bed

- tidy downstairs

- sweep downstairs

- dishes

- spot clean mirrors and windows, etc.

- empty trash

- order more groceries for delivery with any clue as to what we are going to eat holy shit I cannot meal plan to save my life these days

 

BONUS:

- laundry away

- change sheets on our bed

- bathe Odin

 

We can go for a nice walk with mom, Odin and Molly after she gets settled.

 

++

 

Yesterday was an okay day, but I felt like I didn't really get much done. I did a tarot reading for a friend which was fun, but not exactly productive. Took care of my child, which is always productive. Took Odin and Molly to the park and that was a nice walk. Before I knew it, it was 4pm and I needed to get ready for the event I was going to in downtown Sacramento at 6pm. I seemed to forget a lot of things, yesterday. I didn't even eat lunch or have any dinner before I left! No art happened, unfortunately. Stuck with the no alcohol and spiritual reflection things, though. Those combined with our walk to and from the park means that I checked off all of my goals yesterday. I'm feeling  a wee bit better at the end of this paragraph versus the beginning of it. Yay!

Screenshot_20230121-052032.jpg.0428fbac4891475c0c7c2807e6471e17.jpg

  • Like 3

Current NF Challenge: X

“Stay afraid, but do it anyway. What’s important is the action. You don’t have to wait to be confident. Just do it and eventually the confidence will follow.” Carrie Fisher

Link to comment

I feel as though meal planning and making grocery lists actually requires a fair amount of cognitive energy. It's something I struggle with when tired/brain fogged.

  • Like 1

Let cheese and oxen and mead crowd out our secret desires for power and domination - Harriet the Viking

Just be bold, fluid and unapologetic, not small, hairy and indecisive - Harriet the Artist

You can absorb me! - Harriet the Contextless Guru

Link to comment

I find that meal prepping helps: find a good youtube channel that you enjoy, browse it endlessly, get captivated by a recipe, copy-paste the list of ingredients straight from it, buy that (or order it online), cook following the video instructions.

 

This is the one I'm currently following: https://www.youtube.com/@ChefJackOvens

 

I hope the visit from mom-in-law is going well and that you can enjoy it despite the pressure and all the preps.

 

Admittedly, I don't have a mom-in-law myself (and am not a woman so would endure waaaaaaay less pressure anyway) but was reupholstering the chair cushions really necessary? (Also, I've learnt a new word, yay!) I mean, she knows what having kids is, there's got to be stains on the fabrics in the house when it is lively occupied.

  • Like 1
  • Thanks 1

Legally bound to hug people in need.

 

Living life as a Druid is about walking with the beasts. It's about being scared, looking your fears in the eyes and going on anyway. Dread doesn't go away, you just learn to know it. It's still a beast, it still has fangs, but you walk among it.

Link to comment
9 hours ago, Jean said:

Admittedly, I don't have a mom-in-law myself (and am not a woman so would endure waaaaaaay less pressure anyway) but was reupholstering the chair cushions really necessary? (Also, I've learnt a new word, yay!) I mean, she knows what having kids is, there's got to be stains on the fabrics in the house when it is lively occupied.

 

Thank you for the suggestions and especially for the reminder that my mom-in-law was me, once. She's pretty easy going. In the end, I didn't reupholster the cushion on that one super stained chair. No time and frankly got over it.

  • Like 3
  • That's Metal 1

Current NF Challenge: X

“Stay afraid, but do it anyway. What’s important is the action. You don’t have to wait to be confident. Just do it and eventually the confidence will follow.” Carrie Fisher

Link to comment

The Trashcan is back! Bit of a break in my fairly clockwork posts, but I've been distracted. My typically easy going mom-in-law had a lot of "well meaning advice" to dole out regarding parenting of both my child and my dog. She said that we should reconsider trying for a second child and be happy with what we have. She told me she was worried about my health and my husband's health (read weight) in at least three different conversations.

 

Frankly, I'm tired and down. It's not as though anything she said wasn't true. It's just the condescension in her advice multiplied my already judgmental self talk into a monster.

 

Sigh.

 

🙃

 

++

 

In other news, I didn't have a drink while she was in town despite my desire to drown my sorrows lol. Go me! Other wins include a couple of nice walks. No spiritual time, though.

Screenshot_20230124-164159.jpg.608b43b08202405c74a431a2c17fd6e9.jpg

 

  • Like 2

Current NF Challenge: X

“Stay afraid, but do it anyway. What’s important is the action. You don’t have to wait to be confident. Just do it and eventually the confidence will follow.” Carrie Fisher

Link to comment
11 hours ago, TrashcanCarla said:

It's just the condescension in her advice multiplied my already judgmental self talk into a monster.

The condescension alone would have driven me to distraction. Welcome back.

  • Like 1

"When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it." -Henry Ford

"The older I get, the more I understand that the only way to say valuable things is to lose your fear of being correct." -Malcolm Gladwell

"If you know the way broadly, you will see it in all things." -Miyamoto Musashi

Link to comment

Alrighty! Turning over a new leaf this morning, although I'm quite tired and am hoping that the coffee I'm drinking drugs me into wakefulness. Doggie woke me up at 3am and I eventually gave up trying to get her to be chill and rolled out of bed at 4:30. Tried to meditate but kept falling asleep until I meditated myself into a nap from 5am-6:30 haha.

 

Now it's nearly 9 and I present you with a still sleepy but optimistic Quinn.

 

Today:

- draw something for Inktober 52 "Shadow" prompt and post

- put mattress cover and new sheets on bed

- assess mess in garage and do one thing to improve it

- dishes

- laundry and put laundry away

- take kiddo and doggo for a walk

- take a bit of time to try meditating again (if Odie takes a nap today)

- BONUS: cardio dance workout

  • Like 3

Current NF Challenge: X

“Stay afraid, but do it anyway. What’s important is the action. You don’t have to wait to be confident. Just do it and eventually the confidence will follow.” Carrie Fisher

Link to comment

Good morning!

No, I didn't draw something for week 3 which means I'll have to catch up. Unfortunately, I also didn't get far with my list - only scratched off changing sheets and dishes (however I also gave Odin a bath and trimmed his hair, which wasn't on the list). Will need to pick up from yesterday's list.

 

Today:

- draw something for Inktober 52 "Shadow" prompt and post

- assess mess in garage and do one thing to improve it

- dishes

- laundry and put laundry away

- take kiddo and doggo for a walk

- spiritual time

- BONUS: cardio dance workout

 

++

 

I'm kind of feeling low, and a lot of it has to do with my inaction regarding fitness and weight loss. I know what I need to do, but I'm not doing it. Man, the stuff my mom-in-law said to me this weekend really got under my skin. It made me feel like a failure. What really gets me is how easily she was able to unhinge me, even if that wasn't her intention. I thought that I wasn't as susceptible to that sort of thing, but I've been proven wrong. Sigh.

  • Like 1

Current NF Challenge: X

“Stay afraid, but do it anyway. What’s important is the action. You don’t have to wait to be confident. Just do it and eventually the confidence will follow.” Carrie Fisher

Link to comment

Sometimes people just get under our skin, even though we know we shouldn't care about their opinions and what they say. Don't be too hard on yourself. 

 

That dance workout sounds really nice! I hope it will cheer you up and bring you good energy. ^^

  • Thanks 1
Link to comment
On 1/26/2023 at 2:58 PM, TrashcanCarla said:

I'm kind of feeling low, and a lot of it has to do with my inaction regarding fitness and weight loss. I know what I need to do, but I'm not doing it. Man, the stuff my mom-in-law said to me this weekend really got under my skin. It made me feel like a failure. What really gets me is how easily she was able to unhinge me, even if that wasn't her intention. I thought that I wasn't as susceptible to that sort of thing, but I've been proven wrong. Sigh.

 

It feels really bad to not be meeting the standards or goals you set for yourself, so it makes sense it would feel super extra bad if someone else notices and calls you out on it. If you're struggling, then you can also set goals like rest and regenerate the mental readiness you need for the next attempt, or plan the next attempt. Anything, even symbolic, that shows your willingness to go in the right direction, can get ourselves off our backs, as it were. But aren't you already making progress on some other good habits? I thought you were doing well. Maybe it's the expectations that need to slow down a bit.

  • Thanks 1

Let cheese and oxen and mead crowd out our secret desires for power and domination - Harriet the Viking

Just be bold, fluid and unapologetic, not small, hairy and indecisive - Harriet the Artist

You can absorb me! - Harriet the Contextless Guru

Link to comment

Good day, everyone! It's another day, which means another opportunity to make some progress.

 

This past week hasn't been the best for me, but I am determined to turn that around. A lot of it was me wallowing in a negative mindset. I go through waves of moroseness, now and then. It affects everything that I do, so working on getting through those periods is something I'll be doing in a future challenge or two. Or three.

 

I haven't been working on my art and my spiritual work has been a busy, too. Ironically, if I had been working on those things, I likely wouldn't have wallowed for so long. Funny that I didn't think of that earlier, haha.

 

Alright, enough about the wallowing...

 

Yesterday, I went on a nice walk with my little guy and our puppy. Also, I met a couple of cool new people at a meet up at a local brew pub and decided to break Dry January for the day. I thought about it long and hard for the two days leading up to our meeting. I'm fine with my decision. Back to no alcohol! I'm going to keep going into February and see how long I can go. Maybe I won't drop alcohol altogether in the long run, but drinking rarely seems like a good way to be.

 

Husband and I have been talking very seriously about the home gym concept again, which is fab. We are working on cleaning up the garage this weekend in preparation to make space for equipment and also to decrease the clutter in our lives. Yay! 

 

We are looking to put the below power rack into the garage and will get a 20kg barbell and weight plates. We already have a TRX suspension trainer that needs to be installed, a couple of KBs and a rowing machine. It'll be great to make the space to actually use everything! Looking forward to it.

snapshot.jpeg.c991ad112536686826c06067f743acfd.jpeg

snapshot(1).jpeg.36bdca712bd8b81b2885513f1eb3941e.jpeg

  • Like 4
  • That's Metal 2

Current NF Challenge: X

“Stay afraid, but do it anyway. What’s important is the action. You don’t have to wait to be confident. Just do it and eventually the confidence will follow.” Carrie Fisher

Link to comment

Oh and I forgot.

 

Today I'm planning to :

 

- dance party with my son Odin

- go for another walk

- work on cleaning/organizing the garage

- do dishes and tidy kitchen

- make art in any amount or medium

- spend some time getting spiritual or meditating

- make dinner

  • Like 4

Current NF Challenge: X

“Stay afraid, but do it anyway. What’s important is the action. You don’t have to wait to be confident. Just do it and eventually the confidence will follow.” Carrie Fisher

Link to comment

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

New here? Please check out our Privacy Policy and Community Guidelines