[Heidi]

The liturgical calendar marks this as the season of Lent, my favorite season of the Church year, one marked by dedication and gratitude. Through mindful application of ourselves and our spirit, the Way opens before us, as if lit by small lights that bolster us in our efforts. This is the Way.

 

Last challenge I took stock of where I am, of what worked and what didn’t.

This round I’m applying a bit of a honing blade, sloughing off that which doesn’t serve me and narrowing my focus and efforts onto what does.

 

Also last challenge I resurrected the old-school skills tree, marking my progress in somewhat less-than-orthodox ways, but meaningful ones nonetheless. I’m interested to see what comes of this next segment, and would like to level up a point in each. Sometimes the Universe gives me the opportunity to level up a second point as well.

 

1. Constitution: This is wellness, and includes Acupuncture, gym time, good food, and plenty of water and sleep. It also includes the apartment work that I’ve been doing, because being at home while I’m at home is a comfort and an anchor. 
2. Strength: Go to work, each day and every day. I know this seems simple. It’s not as easy as it sounds, physically, and I’m seven months into a six-week contract. Being a contractor has a lot of uncertainty with it, so part of my job is also cultivating and nurturing having my job. (See Dexterity) Additionally, my doctor as given me a PT regimen beyond the routine walking. I’ll be doing exercises with bands in the hopes that additional physical strength will help relieve some of the tension and inflammation that is everywhere all the time.
3. Dexterity: Lots of emotional balance going on between the job and the relationship with my daughter. It feels like significant moments are on the horizon for each. Any movement stat also has to take into consideration transportation, which is once again in the Challenge column. I’m hoping to get more fluent with public transit this round. For everything else, there is Uber.
4. Wisdom: Speaking of balance, there’s also perspective. This is the “choose well” portion of keeping my center and being able to choose well during the chaos. It’s also about lightening my debt load. I’d loaded up some debts with scary interest rates over the last couple years, and I’m grateful I was able to leverage my way out of a bad situation, and now it’s time to put that behind me as swiftly and neatly as possible, without wrecking anything else.  Possible bonuses to other stats as well.
5. Intelligence: The class wraps up this challenge, and I’m glad I’m taking an accelerated course. Also, there’s a fair amount of work that gets to be done for the dissertation. Before I take on the next project, there’s a lingering, overdue paper that I really want to finish up and move on from, probably next challenge, but definite bonus sparkles if I get it done this round.
6. Charisma: Alliances and support. We aren’t meant to be on this path alone. Thanks for being here.

 

[Sepherina]

Thank you for sharing and having us along. ☺️

[Tanktimus the Encourager]

Here to help you water the skills tree.

[Scaly Freak]

It's Lent already? Sheesh.

[Heidi]

1 hour ago, Sepherina said:

Thank you for sharing and having us along. ☺️

We might go faster alone, but we go farther together. 
Welcome!

 

1 hour ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

Here to help you water the skills tree.

Then the roots will be mighty and the shade of the leaves will be a respite to many.

good to have you along.

 

53 minutes ago, Scaly Freak said:

It's Lent already? Sheesh.

Nope, not quite yet. We still have a little more than two weeks before Ash Wednesday, but this is my theme.

Glad to see you!
Are you doing a challenge this round?

Grab some lavender-mint tea and tell me all about how you’ve been.

[DarK_RaideR]

9 hours ago, Heidi said:

This round I’m applying a bit of a honing blade, sloughing off that which doesn’t serve me and narrowing my focus and efforts onto what does.

Wise, as always. I'm with you on the minimalism stuff.

[Heidi]

1 hour ago, DarK_RaideR said:

Wise, as always. I'm with you on the minimalism stuff.

Less is more, now as always.

 

This morning I woke up with a low-key weird head, but I made my way to the gym anyway, and I'm glad I did. 

I only walked half a mile, but it was exactly the right choice; by the time I headed down to the sauna I was feeling like and Acutal Person again.

Extra long time in the steam room and sauna, then a chat with Brandi at the check-in desk about the haircut (I still need to have the top thinned and more taken off) and out the door I went, feeling kind of awesome. Back in the loft, made tea and put a load of laundry in. Doing small loads regularly is not a habit I have ever formed, and I'm liking this a lot.

 

The programming chair came back last week and got steamed cleaned, and this rmoning it was dry and ready for me. I like being able to workin the living room again (I was working out of the bedroom while the chair was away). This is good. One of the things I want to work with this challenge is moving the electronics out of the bedroom.  I'm still new to the habit of balancing time and space. 

[Snarkyfishguts]

Taking charge of your space is always a good feeling. I'm glad the chair has returned so you can restore balance in your space!

[Sovalis]

Here to follow along as you nest and rest and write and strive. 💐

[Heidi]

Just heard from the acupuncturist that he's not feeling well. We rescheduled for next week, and that's all good with me, as I'm effectively worn out. I'm still at work, but getting to the end of the work day is a low-level boss fight today. 

 

For lunch I grated a potato, microwaved it for a minute in a glass container, then mixed two eggs into it, added some torn up cheese, and microwaved it for another couple minutes. I topped it with black pepper (which helps make it through the sluggishness). I'll need to eat something else soon, but I'm not feeling like moving. I'm glad that yesterday-me stocked the kitchen with good food and took the time to prep it and make it simple.

 

The vitamin D level is so low that my doc wonders how I get out of bed each day, and this also makes sense for why the Mountain Days seem to happen.

[Heidi]

Today I woke up and made it to the gym, a little later than my usual schedule, but if it takes longer, it takes longer. I am okay with prioritizing the gym over clocking in an hour and a half before anyone else gets there.

 

I ended up walking with one of the old-timers again, and we did a mile and a quarter before you knew it. I really like these days.

I went to the locker room and realized I had left my (freshly-washed) towels back at the apartment. I toyed with the idea of skipping the steam room and sauna for all of a half-second. I grabbed my washcloth and that was good enough. Into the steam room I went and it was amazing.

 

I logged into work and it was a bit of a nothing day, which was exactly what I needed. I wasn’t feeling particularly present, even though I was feeling comfortable and good overall physically. It was a nice day to coast. 

 

I steamed some salmon yesterday and set it in the fridge, and today I pulled it out at lunchtime and shredded it on top of a kale salad that had lots of carrots, broccoli, and Brussels sprouts. I tossed the whole thing with a balsamic vinaigrette, and it was super delicious. I got an email that the dressers were ready, so I took the rest of my lunch hour and made space for them, which also meant cleaning up a bunch of dust-bunnies that always collect behind shelf units. I moved the bamboo shelf unit to the bathroom, and I stocked it with Vivian’s and my towels, along with other bath sundries. I like it. The dressers came after work, by which time I was pretty exhausted mentally even though I hadn’t done much in the way of actual work, and after I got them in pace, I put my clothes away. Wow. What a difference that makes. It feels great too. It has been a long time since I had a dresser (multiple decades). 

 

I also washed Vivian’s sheets, sent a couple emails, and laid out a challenge tracker spreadsheet thing that I 100% copied straight from @DarK_RaideR.  I added colors to the columns by skills tree stat and, surprising no one, most everything is in the wellness column. This is good. This is the Way.

 

Speaking of the Way, there’s a Buddhist group that gets together and sits three nights a week. They’ve been meeting for over 40 years, and I am considering going and sitting, especially now that the weather is turning nicer. It’s only a few minutes away by scooter.

 

We’ll see what shakes out. I am very pleased with the progress and the foundation that I’ve got right now. It’s still a new rhythm, and I’m feeling my way into it. The last thing I need to do is wreck the whole works by adding in Yet Another Task, especially in the evenings. This is still all good.

 

I took a nice long hot bath, set up my supplements for the coming few days, and am ready for bed.

May your heart be light.

[Tanktimus the Encourager]

Glad you got a nothing day at work, you deserve many.

[Sovalis]

Yay for a good coasting day at work. You more than deserve that after how hard you've been working for them lately! 

 

It brings me a lot of joy to hear you talk about walking with your old timers. I have moved away from my community (years ago now, but they're still my people) and I miss having my friends who were a generation or two older than me and their company and mentorship. It's such a gift. Thank you for bringing that to mind this morning. 

[Snarkyfishguts]

It's really lovely when you need a break and you get a break. I'm glad you had a quiet day at work. 

That spreadsheet is fantastic.  Dang

[Qnobi]

Following!

[Heidi]

On 2/7/2023 at 9:21 PM, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

Glad you got a nothing day at work, you deserve many.

I'll let my boss know. 😊

 

8 hours ago, Sovalis said:

Yay for a good coasting day at work. You more than deserve that after how hard you've been working for them lately! 

 

It brings me a lot of joy to hear you talk about walking with your old timers. I have moved away from my community (years ago now, but they're still my people) and I miss having my friends who were a generation or two older than me and their company and mentorship. It's such a gift. Thank you for bringing that to mind this morning. 

I really like it, and I got to do it again this morning. Im glad it brought them to mind -- they lighten my heart. I walked 1.3 miles just talking again, and it seemed to fly by. Then a nice long trip to the steam room and sauna.

 

6 hours ago, Snarkyfishguts said:

It's really lovely when you need a break and you get a break. I'm glad you had a quiet day at work. 

That spreadsheet is fantastic.  Dang

That spreadsheet is totally stolen from @DarK_RaideR. I added some columns and colors, his is much more streamlined, of which I approve.

 

2 hours ago, Qnobi said:

Following!

Welcome!

 

Today was a Whole Day. It took forever to get moving -- no head issues just loads of heavy slowness. Okay, universe, I thought. I considered skipping the gym, but didn't really want to, so I decided to see how long it would take to get there. About an hour later, I was walking the track and was my whole self again by the end of the first lap. There were a surprising number rof people on the track, and I'll keep that in mind in case I'm late again. It's like a completely different gym an hour later.

 

I was running behind, so made up for it by taking extra long in the steam room and shower. I wasn't due at work technically until 8, and I decided it would do my spirit and my boss a world of good for me to show up "on time" instead of early. I ended up only working 8.5 hours today, and it feels like I played hooky.

 

Things blew up at work in mid morning, and by noon I was super glad  I had scheduled the last hair appointment. I walked down and meet the bus. I even got on the right one this time. I was super impressed with myself.

10 hours ago, Heidi said:

I got on the right bus!!!!

(please clap)

But I posted in the wrong thread!

 

 

The hair is super short, and I'll be growing it out, but I feel comfortable and confident with it finally. We discovered that I have actually too much hair to do anything like a short style. It just never ends. We cut; we thinned; we gelled. Nope. Anyway, I like it well enough and it is a good base. I kind of look like Sandy Duncan as Peter Pan (but you know, brunette with a grey splash). 

 

I took Uber back home since the next bus wouldn't come for another hour, and got back just in time to pick up where we left off with the circus and monkeys. Truly, a kind of wild ride today that ultimately changed exactly nothing. 

 

The call with Vivian was the usual pattern. I call, it's ignored, she texts an hour later asking me to call. I do.

 

After work I had milk delivery and apartment chores. I like the lady who helps me very much. I love clean sheet day, and it made light work and lovely conversation to have someone to help wrangle the corners and Vivian's loft. I was wiped out before we started, and was super tired (but very content) when she left. I steeped a pot of tea and ran a bath. This is good. This is the Way.

 

While I was in the bath I thought about the brain scan in March. It's three days; it's invasive; it's far away; it's six thousand dollars (plus train and hotel and food and stuff) on top of three lost days' wages. But the real deal-breaker is that even if they find some sort of blood flow issue, they would just prescribe a medication I wouldn't take or a surgical procedure that I would reject. This sounds like an exercise in frustration and futility, and an expensive one to boot. I think I'd rather  keep doing acupuncture.

 

This is good.

This is the Way.

 

[Ranger Hal]

57 minutes ago, Heidi said:

But I posted in the wrong thread!

Considering that your options were get on the wrong bus and post in the wrong thread, I think you chose wisely!

[Heidi]

16 hours ago, Ranger Hal said:

Considering that your options were get on the wrong bus and post in the wrong thread, I think you chose wisely!

 

Thank you. These are helpful reminders along the Way.

 

This morning I barely made it out of bed, and did not, in fact, make it to the gym. I am not surprised that everything was low-key sore and stiff; I walked over 8000 steps yesterday and lifted heavy things and put them back down; I got on the right bus and squeezed a good-for-me errand into a lunch on an emoitionally chaotic day. I did chores even though I was wiped out, and I was able to do them cheerfully because I had help and company. This is the Way, and a rest day was in order. My morning "workout" today consisted of making tea and folding laundry from yesterday.

 

Today I put one metaphoric foot in front of the other. It has been a very long day, and for the second day in a row I am astonished when it is only 2:30 or 3, certain that it has slipped past five and is headed to six. But no.

There were panics and crises before 10. I navigated them.

There were crashes and kerfuffles by 3. I wove them into my work, and my work got done, and problems got sorted, and it was good.

At 3, I realized I hadn't had anything to eat yet, and also that I hadn't ordered supplies, so I walked away from the computer and put together what was supposed to be a small salad but ended up needeing a two-quart mixing bowl. Chopped Kale, shredded carrot, an avocado, apple bits, cranberries, sunflower seeds, broccoli, chopped brussels sprouts, all tossed with a simple herb-and-balsamic vinaigrette. 

I sat down at my little dining nook and ate while I put togehter the supplies order, which will be here for the weekend.  I took the salad bowl back over to the programming chair, because I wanted just one more bite, and by the time i had investigated a synch error, the bowl was empty. Wow. Okay, Universe, I guess i needed all of that.

 

I have a writing student tonight and she and I are just going to gab about Writers' Block, which is perfect since I haven't had time to read and reflect on any work, mine or hers or anyone else's this week. 

 

I have an annotated bibliography that I need to put some finihsing touches on before tomorrow evening, and then turn in for class. I'm pleased with what I have so far, and I think the rest will come in nice, easily managed, small steps.

 

May you have peace this day, friends.

 

[Heidi]

I feel a whole year older than I did this morning.

 

Today was a three ring circus with monkeys (not the Monkees) at work.

I ended up in a problem-solving war room and missed the virtual appointment with my daughter’s therapist (at 10), and then the day just got more screwed up from there. 

I am exhausted.

 

I didn’t go to the gym this morning, and now I’m just going to go lie on my bed and stare at the wall for an hour.

 

[Tanktimus the Encourager]

Sorry you had a rough day. You aren't paid enough. 

[Heidi]

On 2/10/2023 at 7:26 PM, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

Sorry you had a rough day. You aren't paid enough. 

Well, it’s more about the chaos and lack of management, but I hear what you are saying. I’m understanding why people don’t last on this team. (Since showing up in June, three people were let go in July, one person was let go in August, and three more were let go in December. Each of these separations happened without communication and fell on the spectrum between inelegant and brutal. It’s a difficult work environment, and it’s because of a single personality.) Thank you for commiserating. ❤️ 

 

I did, in fact, rest Friday evening, if you can call mindlessly sitting and checking out for a couple hours rest. It was more of a situation where meditation was going to happen whether I had it scheduled or not. Ok, Universe; I hear you. I slept more than 8 hours. This is good. This is the Way.

 

I am very glad that I had submitted my annotated bibliography on Thursday evening (it wasn’t due until early Saturday morning, and I was tempted to hold it and take another look and add a few more recent sources, but then I looked at how the week had gone already and decided to send it off and clear the task. This is Wisdom.)

 

Yesterday I woke up late-ish, which was fine and good and needed. I made my way slowly around the apartment, putting in a load of laundry and making tea, taking out the trash. Vivian helped bring up the scooters and set them up for charging in case we wanted to go anywhere: the weather was gorgeous, and it wasn’t going to last, so yesterday was the day for out-and-a outing if it was going to happen this weekend.  She and I had mostly a rest day — her choice — and I was glad to the bone for it. Games, good food, random conversation that happens during parallel activity (our favorite mode of operations). I set up a new knitting project (a lightweight silk-blend pullover), and it might get finished, or it might not; that is less relevant than simply knitting. 

 

This morning the weather has turned as dreary as promised, with rain and sleet and grey skies. I woke up and put in another load of laundry (my sheets, which had been waiting for their turn) and waved at the clean stuff in the dryer as I made tea and read the news. I cleaned the counters and ended up wiping down the cabinet fronts and the area around the bathroom doorknob that always seems to end up with fingerprints and scuff marks, but that I forget to clean when I’m cleaning the bathroom itself. 

 

There’s an hour before Vivian arrives for the day. We don’t have much planned other than practicing her saxophone pieces for the upcoming concerts (plural), and I’m sipping tea and resting until then. It’s a good day, and a good start to the Official Challenge Day 1.

 

May you have a beautiful day.

🦋

[Qnobi]

I read a book once (The No A***ole Rule) that said: on any team, it's better to have a hole than an a***ole. Truer words!

 

Hope you have a redeeming week!

[Scaly Freak]

3 hours ago, Heidi said:

Well, it’s more about the chaos and lack of management, but I hear what you are saying. I’m understanding why people don’t last on this team. (Since showing up in June, three people were let go in July, one person was let go in August, and three more were let go in December. Each of these separations happened without communication and fell on the spectrum between inelegant and brutal. It’s a difficult work environment, and it’s because of a single personality.)

 

I was just about to ask if your company is hiring... and now I've changed my mind.  

 

May you have a beautiful day as well.  

[Heidi]

1 hour ago, Scaly Freak said:

was just about to ask if your company is hiring... and now I've changed my mind.  

honestly, the other teams are all great. it's localized.

And the short answer is YES they are very much absolutely hiring!

I see it as a bonus that I get to work as a contactor for a bit: this lets me test-drive the environment and know what I'm signing up for.

In case you weren't just being hilarious (althogh it was super funny anyway). let me know if you have any interest and i'll drop you the link.

 

1 hour ago, Scaly Freak said:

May you have a beautiful day as well.  

Thank you -- we are having a lovely day, nested in and playing games. 

Lunch was a five-napkin burger, holy-cow-these-are-good fries, and she got a milkshake (I did not).

 

We ahve tickets to the symphony this afternoon but I haven't mentioned it -- the new pickup time on Sundays means that we don't have time to stay through the whole thing and have dinner as well.

Spoiler

It's irksome, and I asked the counselor why she changed the Sunday pick-up time; she said it must have been a typo and that she'd fix it (the same response she gave in October about the same question regarding shortening the pickup time for visitation during early dismissal).

she has sent out an update twice, and this hasn't been corrected in either update.

 

it's rainy and cold. we have clean laundry, goofball conversation, and super-yummy food.

it's a good day to be a nerd.

[Scaly Freak]

4 minutes ago, Heidi said:

In case you weren't just being hilarious (althogh it was super funny anyway). let me know if you have any interest and i'll drop you the link.

 

I need a job. So, yes, please. Private message preferable, because I have questions