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Mags' latest crisis


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Going back to sleep in a sec....last night was tedious but better. I got to work my station by myself as my trainee (who hasn't really done any training bc she didn't want to learn the whole station) wasn't there so I didn't have to check behind anyone and couls focus on my own work. Didn't have a single error. Also caught defective product before it could be used, and so saved us a lot of time. 

 

Ngl I am kinda Down about having to go to work tomorrow night...trying not to dwell on it. I'm not doing much in the meantime. Catching up some chores mainly and Sleeping. Not much ot this upcoming week, which I'm pleased about. Managed to get two days instead of three. Not going in the morning bc I'm still trying to recover from what 1st shift did to me on Saturday. 

 

In one of those phases where eating is difficult. Even tea sounds kinda Gross. 

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Matthew 25:34-40

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It's becoming clear I am unlikely to recoup significant spoons over the short weekend, so I'm giving myself only two tasks

 

1. Clear off the bar in the kitchen 

2. Straighten up my room

 

I feel like I'm going to be back on One Job Per Day for a bit and add stuff back in. Taking my meds at the same time every day might be a job in itself. Idk why I've always sucked at taking pills as directed, especially when I clearly need them. :P

 

grocery pickup later. I got some modeling clay. 

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Matthew 25:34-40

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I did not clear off the bar over the weekend but I did watch TV and have a good time with my friend, so that is plenty. 

 

Currently stood outside work waiting for my brother. He has the car keys. My line let out early but I don't know if his did. Phone is dead for calls rn :P

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Matthew 25:34-40

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Psych appointment May 1st, Follow-up with regular doc on the 10th. Currently knackered from work and have been massively struggling to keep my apartment clean or like, eat food. Right now i'm hungry as heck but eating is disgusting and i don't want to but i'm hungry but Nothing Sounds Good and it's very much Annoying. 

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Matthew 25:34-40

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14 minutes ago, Maggie-Miau said:

Psych appointment May 1st, Follow-up with regular doc on the 10th. Currently knackered from work and have been massively struggling to keep my apartment clean or like, eat food. Right now i'm hungry as heck but eating is disgusting and i don't want to but i'm hungry but Nothing Sounds Good and it's very much Annoying. 

 

That is annoying. I get the same thing when I'm stressed, food is just NOPE. Sometimes I can manage soup. Sometimes no. Either way I hope that you can get some rest or brain space or nourishment or whatever you need most to start getting some spoons back. 

 

Prayers! 

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“Then something Tookish woke up inside of him, and he wished to go and see the great mountains, and hear the pine-trees and the waterfalls, and explore the caves, and wear a sword instead of a walking-stick."

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Hope you're doing okay, Mags

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We have to work Sunday. I have OT in the morning. I've realized part of my problem is a lack of positive feedback. I've been having more and more severe anxiety about going into work and about staying over on First Shift. waking up with chest pains and all sorts.

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Matthew 25:34-40

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4 minutes ago, Maggie-Miau said:

Broski just revealed suicidal ideation and idk what to do bc I feel exactly the same way so we're just two idiots who both don't want to be here 

You are not idiots. You are both in pain. It is logical to want pain to stop. Suicidal ideation is not a measure of a person's worth, but an indicator a person needs help. Reach out to a suicide hotline if you need to.

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2 hours ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

You are not idiots. You are both in pain. It is logical to want pain to stop. Suicidal ideation is not a measure of a person's worth, but an indicator a person needs help. Reach out to a suicide hotline if you need to.

 

I haven't had much luck with those in the past. Seems like they always just say to take breaks. 

 

I'm really feeling the weight of car payment and rent and overtime and I want to Go Away

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Matthew 25:34-40

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6 hours ago, Maggie-Miau said:

 

I haven't had much luck with those in the past. Seems like they always just say to take breaks. 

 

I'm really feeling the weight of car payment and rent and overtime and I want to Go Away

That is really hard.

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don't know yet if it's even doable or if i'm completely insane but i'm thinking about moving when the lease is up, leaving Alabama. My Carpentry Instructor from JobCorps can help me get into any United Brotherhood of Carpenters local in the states  since i completed that preapprenticeship. i would have to chug that protein powder like it's my job and get some strength built up but. I miss the carpentry, and union carpentry would be more like Gig Work as opposed to doing the same thing every day over and over and over again. Other than JobCorps, this is the longest i've been at one job and i'm getting fidgety. Momsauce says dad was the same way.

 

My driving has come along pretty well i think. It doesn't always scare me anymore.

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Matthew 25:34-40

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3 hours ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said:

I like the part where you leave Alabama and no longer feel responsible for your brother.

 

I have a lot of Logistics to figure out but i think it might really be a good option.  I miss the carpentry. Apprenticeship also comes with measurable (haha, measure 😆) progression 

 

I've messaged my instructor to see what he has to say. Looking at different states to see where might be good to relocate.

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Matthew 25:34-40

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