SkyGirl Posted March 24 Report Share Posted March 24 Hello friends! My name is Sky, and I'm a 30-something wife and social media specialist who has been Rangering here at NF for almost 7 years. There are a lot of physical goals I need to be working on right now (rebuilding strength in my legs so my knees don't hurt so badly; building core and upper body strength; losing a little weight; getting my janky shoulder looked at), but the biggest hurdle I'm facing this challenge is a pair of therapy/psychiatrist appointments that I've been putting off for many years. Short version: I have moderately severe anxiety and a severe phobia that have made my quality of life pretty crappy for a long time, but they worsened during the pandemic to the point that a lot of my daily energy goes to managing my symptoms and it's wrecking my body (nightmares, panic attacks, irritable bowel syndrome, etc.). Recently, my husband and I started looking for a new house, which is something I'm very excited about and have looked forward to for months; but even that positive change triggered strong anxiety attacks and made me miserable for several weeks. So, I'm finally admitting that I need some extra help to get back to where I'm feeling good more days than I'm feeling bad. Next week, I have an appointment with a psychiatrist to start medication (likely antidepressants), and with a new therapist to start specialized phobia treatment. While I know these are positive steps that will almost certainly drastically improve my quality of life ... I'm terrified. I've never been on antidepressants before and I'm scared of possible negative side effects (even though I know those are uncommon, I'll start on a very low dose, etc.). And I know that no matter what paradigm this new therapist uses for phobia treatment, one way or another it's going to mean facing the thing that scares me more than anything else in the world. I would basically rather sacrifice my own hand. I almost didn't create a thread this challenge, because I really don't have many concrete goals besides rest, self-care and doing the hard work of starting meds and settling into that routine. That could be either really boring or really dramatic, and I feel a little shy about both options. But I really need the support and accountability of my NF peeps who will not only listen to me process with compassion, but also give me a kick in the pants to keep going and not give up. So ... I'm showing up because I'd rather run away and hide, and in my experience this has been one of the best places to go when I feel like that. ❤️ This will probably be more of a battle log than a challenge, but I do have other projects and workout things I'm tinkering with, so I'll talk about those too. And I'm glad to be here. I love you guys. ❤️ Onward! 11 Quote SKY ELVENWORD NOBLEHEART The Silver Archer, Ranger Level 53 Jesus-follower | Writer | Encourager | Resident Myers-Briggs and Enneagram Geek "Knowing that we can be loved exactly as we are gives us all the best opportunity for growing into the healthiest of people." - Fred Rogers Link to comment
Rhovaniel Posted March 24 Report Share Posted March 24 Sky, it is wonderful to see you here. 8 hours ago, SkyGirl said: While I know these are positive steps that will almost certainly drastically improve my quality of life ... I'm terrified. I've never been on antidepressants before and I'm scared of possible negative side effects (even though I know those are uncommon, I'll start on a very low dose, etc.). And I know that no matter what paradigm this new therapist uses for phobia treatment, one way or another it's going to mean facing the thing that scares me more than anything else in the world. I would basically rather sacrifice my own hand. Change IS scary, Sky. It's hard, but you're probably going to find having one hand a little inconvenient If it helps, YOU ARE NOT ALONE AND YOU ARE NOT WEAK. I truly did not think I had the strength to face my demons and the worst of my fears last May. Nor get through the other side. But I did. I made it and so can you. The best part? It lessens the hold the feat holds on you. It frees you. 9 hours ago, SkyGirl said: I almost didn't create a thread this challenge, because I really don't have many concrete goals besides rest, self-care and doing the hard work of starting meds and settling into that routine. That could be either really boring or really dramatic, and I feel a little shy about both options. But I really need the support and accountability of my NF peeps who will not only listen to me process with compassion, but also give me a kick in the pants to keep going and not give up. So ... I'm showing up because I'd rather run away and hide, and in my experience this has been one of the best places to go when I feel like that. ❤️ I am really glad you created a thread Sky. This place is a wholesome nook of the internet. We have gifs, and a barkeep with a talent for choosing you the best drink for your needs, and a host of rebels who support and care about you ❤️ 2 1 Quote “All You Have To Decide Is What To Do With The Time That Is Given To You.” - Gandalf The Chronicles of Rhovaniel, Dúnedain Ranger: Volume One: Wintering, Volume Two: Winter is Passing, Spring is Near, The Chronicles of Rhovaniel, Volume Three: Reborn into Spring, Rhovaniel Batltes the PEWS (late spring challenge)| Volume Four: Strength in Summer|Volume Five: Ambushed in the Archives (current) Spoiler Previous Challenges: 1|2|3|4|5|6|7|8|9|10|11|12|13 14| 15|16|17|18|19|20|21|22|23|24|25|26|27| 28 29|30 Link to comment
shaar Posted March 24 Report Share Posted March 24 I am happy you are here too!! I don't think the challenge goals matter as much as the camaraderie and support and friends anyway ❤️ Rho is absolutely right, when you don't think you have what it takes to face the scary things, you take a deep breath and take one little step at a time and you end up doing it. And it's SO much better for future you. My dad always told me as a kid that the definition of courage was "doing what needs to be done despite the fear" and here I am 30-something years later holding that close and realizing how true it is! You are brave and courageous and I'm always proud of you ❤️❤️ 2 1 Quote i am not waiting for a hero. i saved myself long ago. Level 58 Bard & Monk of the Furious Heart STR.55 DEX.43 STA.48 CON.51 WIS.53 CHA.65 "Well...in the end, it boils down to two simple choices. Either you do or you don't. You'd think with all the problems in this world, there'd be more answers. It's not fair... ...But that's the way things are. The choice is yours." Link to comment
Tanktimus the Encourager Posted March 24 Report Share Posted March 24 I'm so proud of you. You are facing your fears. 1 1 Quote Current Challenge "By the Most-Righteous-and-Blessed Beard of Sir Tanktimus the Encourager!" - Jarl Rurik Harrgath Link to comment
SkyGirl Posted March 25 Author Report Share Posted March 25 I love you guys and I'm so glad you're here!! 🥰 Every one of you inspires me to keep going and not give up, and that's the biggest reason I knew I needed to create a thread to go through these next few weeks. My IRL friends are wonderfully supportive, but they're also less likely to push me to face my fears or take stronger mental health care measures. I'm thankful for the encouragement AND loving pokes that I get here. ❤️ Last night I talked with Eamon for a little while about my "why's." I know that no matter how good of an idea others around me think these changes are, I won't stick with them unless I have reasons of my own. Eamon has been through some dark mental health times of his own and had to face similar scary changes to get healthy again, so he is extraordinarily compassionate toward my fear and reluctance, while also recognizing my excuses and self-sabotage and not letting me off the hook for them. A few of the reasons I came up with were: I am supporting myself with medication because I want to feel good enough to enjoy the exciting and positive things happening in my life. I am supporting myself with medication because I want to allow my body to heal and make long-term wellness possible. I am pursuing phobia therapy because it is inconsistent with my values to allow my fear to continue harming people around me. I am pursuing phobia therapy because I want to be free to be the best friend, wife, and mother that I can be. I am pursuing phobia therapy because this phobia is not helping me, protecting me, or keeping me safe - it is a false belief that has held me back and made my life worse for many years. Once I'm happy with my list, I may write it out on paper or a whiteboard so I can see it and remind myself of why I'm doing this. Of course there's a great chance it won't be nearly as bad as I think, and I'm certain that even if it is, I'll be very glad I pursued both of these treatments. But for the first part when I'm scared and dragging my feet, it may be helpful. In the rest of life, I just wrapped a week-long work retreat where we spent many hours on tedious web / digital tasks, so my brain is fried and I'm excited for a quiet weekend. I've been trying to take breaks for resistance band exercises and walks to help strengthen my knee stabilizer muscles; I started crocheting a baby afghan for one of my best friends; I got some new clothes that made me really happy; and tomorrow I'm going to go to Target to get a pizza stone, so Eamon and I can make pizzas for date night next week. I'm in the quieter part of my hormone cycle so I feel good mentally too. And, my bedtime alarm went off a bit ago, so it's time to skedaddle. Thank you for being here and supporting me!! ❤️ 5 Quote SKY ELVENWORD NOBLEHEART The Silver Archer, Ranger Level 53 Jesus-follower | Writer | Encourager | Resident Myers-Briggs and Enneagram Geek "Knowing that we can be loved exactly as we are gives us all the best opportunity for growing into the healthiest of people." - Fred Rogers Link to comment
Tanktimus the Encourager Posted March 25 Report Share Posted March 25 You do make good baby afghans. Sleep well. Quote Current Challenge "By the Most-Righteous-and-Blessed Beard of Sir Tanktimus the Encourager!" - Jarl Rurik Harrgath Link to comment
SkyGirl Posted March 25 Author Report Share Posted March 25 Another "why": I am pursuing medication AND phobia therapy so I can stop waking up at 3AM with nightmares about my phobia and then not falling back asleep for several hours because my brain won't shut off. 🤪 5 hours ago, Tanktimus the Encourager said: You do make good baby afghans. Sleep well. Thank you friend! I had so much fun making Little Bit's afghan and I hope this little girl will enjoy hers too. ☺️ 4 Quote SKY ELVENWORD NOBLEHEART The Silver Archer, Ranger Level 53 Jesus-follower | Writer | Encourager | Resident Myers-Briggs and Enneagram Geek "Knowing that we can be loved exactly as we are gives us all the best opportunity for growing into the healthiest of people." - Fred Rogers Link to comment
shaar Posted March 25 Report Share Posted March 25 Can I just say That I love how you and Eamon sit down and COMMUNICATE about this stuff all the time. Like it is so so so so crucial in a solid partnership and you guys DO IT and you are there for each other and always on the same path. Ao is the first partner I've really been able to communicate well with too - we are both extremely open with each other about everything, even if it's scary or whatever - and it's a serious game changer. I'm proud of how you both can come together and lay it on the line and collaborate for the greater good of you both, and be each others best advocate while doing it!!!!! ❤️❤️ Also a good pizza stone is really non negotiable and is AMAZING to have in the kitchen!!! A lot of times I'll make pizza on those flatbread wraps and it comes out SO good and crispy.. It's kinda one of my favorite things to do hahaha, last time I made fig and goat cheese flatbreads with caramelized onions, walnuts anddrizzled with honey and it was THE BEST! Let us know what y'all end up making!!! 5 Quote i am not waiting for a hero. i saved myself long ago. Level 58 Bard & Monk of the Furious Heart STR.55 DEX.43 STA.48 CON.51 WIS.53 CHA.65 "Well...in the end, it boils down to two simple choices. Either you do or you don't. You'd think with all the problems in this world, there'd be more answers. It's not fair... ...But that's the way things are. The choice is yours." Link to comment
SkyGirl Posted March 25 Author Report Share Posted March 25 11 hours ago, shaar said: Can I just say That I love how you and Eamon sit down and COMMUNICATE about this stuff all the time. Like it is so so so so crucial in a solid partnership and you guys DO IT and you are there for each other and always on the same path. Ao is the first partner I've really been able to communicate well with too - we are both extremely open with each other about everything, even if it's scary or whatever - and it's a serious game changer. I'm proud of how you both can come together and lay it on the line and collaborate for the greater good of you both, and be each others best advocate while doing it!!!!! ❤️❤️ Honestly it's still kinda crazy to me too!! Eamon is also my first partner with whom I know I can share my deepest thoughts without being afraid of him thinking badly of me - and, importantly, that's something that we've learned over time and are still learning and practicing, rather than it being something that just "happened" or came naturally. I really do know that I can tell him anything and talk through anything with him, and I've learned that because he keeps showing up with consistency and compassion every time I choose to turn toward him and trust him with my heart. I am working hard to be the same safe and healthy space for him - and it makes me so happy that Ao is a safe, caring, healthy place for you too!! ❤️❤️❤️ 11 hours ago, shaar said: Also a good pizza stone is really non negotiable and is AMAZING to have in the kitchen!!! A lot of times I'll make pizza on those flatbread wraps and it comes out SO good and crispy.. It's kinda one of my favorite things to do hahaha, last time I made fig and goat cheese flatbreads with caramelized onions, walnuts anddrizzled with honey and it was THE BEST! Let us know what y'all end up making!!! YUMMMMM WOWWW THOSE SOUND SO GOOD //sob// We did find a (nice? I think?) pizza stone at Target today and I'm so excited to give it a whirl!! ❤️ I'll be sure to share our pizza adventures!! 3 Quote SKY ELVENWORD NOBLEHEART The Silver Archer, Ranger Level 53 Jesus-follower | Writer | Encourager | Resident Myers-Briggs and Enneagram Geek "Knowing that we can be loved exactly as we are gives us all the best opportunity for growing into the healthiest of people." - Fred Rogers Link to comment
TheGreyJedi-Ranger Posted March 27 Report Share Posted March 27 Hey Sky! So proud of you for showing up ❤️ Scary things are just that... scary. I went back to therapy last week even though every time I have to start over with a new therapist I get scared and worried and freak myself out. But yeah, I'm super proud of you and I'll be here cheering you on from the sidelines. Sidenote: I really like the idea of a bedtime alarm. Does it help? Quote Grey Jedi Ranger Jedi Becomes A Hero Vol VII: Jedi Keeps Pushing Jedi Battle Log “Keep Calm, Carry On, and Don't Freeze Up!” - Oboro Shirakumo (Loud Cloud), My Hero Academia Vigilantes Challenges: #1, #2, #3, #4, #5, #6, #7, #8, #9, #10, #11, #12. #13, #14, #15, #16, #17, #18, #19, #20, #21, #22, #23, #24, #25, #26, #27, #28, #29, #30, #31, #32, #33, #34, #35, #36, #37, #38, #39, #40, #41, #42, #43, #44, #45, #46, #47, #48, #49, #50, #51, #52, #53, #54, #55, #56, #57, #58, #59, #60, Link to comment
SkyGirl Posted March 28 Author Report Share Posted March 28 22 hours ago, TheGreyJedi-Ranger said: Hey Sky! So proud of you for showing up ❤️ Scary things are just that... scary. I went back to therapy last week even though every time I have to start over with a new therapist I get scared and worried and freak myself out. But yeah, I'm super proud of you and I'll be here cheering you on from the sidelines. Sidenote: I really like the idea of a bedtime alarm. Does it help? HUGS I'm sooooo proud of you!! Starting with a new therapist IS scary and I'm so proud of you for pushing through the feelings of fear. ❤️ I hope it helps and you start to feel a little more like yourself very soon! And the bedtime alarm ... does and doesn't help. Meaning, when I lived by myself and used a bedtime alarm, I just snoozed or turned off the alarm and went to bed whenever I pleased. But my husband is much more strict about his bedtime and rising time, so when the alarm goes off, he really does drop whatever he's doing and get up and go to bed. (I can only dream of this level of self-discipline.) So ... the combination of a bedtime alarm and a conscientious husband works. The bedtime alarm alone does not work for me. Do with that information what you will! 3 Quote SKY ELVENWORD NOBLEHEART The Silver Archer, Ranger Level 53 Jesus-follower | Writer | Encourager | Resident Myers-Briggs and Enneagram Geek "Knowing that we can be loved exactly as we are gives us all the best opportunity for growing into the healthiest of people." - Fred Rogers Link to comment
SkyGirl Posted March 28 Author Report Share Posted March 28 Today the anxiety is really setting in and I'm getting really nervous about my appointments ... and while I'm tempted to be embarrassed or downplay those feelings, I'm not going to. ❤️ Starting a new medication is scary, especially when you've never taken it before and don't know how it might affect you. Not to mention, when there are so many horror stories about terrible side effects, taking ages to find the right medication, etc. So, I'm trying to be kind to myself, like I would to a friend. ❤️ I've felt the anxiety in my throat, chest and stomach for a few days now, but today when the thoughts started to intensify and I knew I was at risk of spiraling, I took my therapist's advice and closed my eyes to doze for five minutes. It ... actually did help stop the spiral. Amazing that she might know what she's talking about. I should have exercised today, but work was busy and I didn't stop to take a break, so I'll try to stretch before bed and then hopefully get a walk tomorrow. I also need to go to the store for some veggies because we're mostly out and I had no veg at all today. But on the flip side, we found a couple of promising houses in our search today, and I'm also daydreaming about what kinds of projects I'd like to do in a new house, and how I can apply some of those ideas to our current space (plants, lights, wall decor, etc.). Because while moving to a larger place would be exciting, I also love our little newlywed apartment very much and I'm going to miss it when we do move. I want to keep loving it well and enjoying it while we're here. Not much more to report - Eamon is sick with bronchitis or a sinus infection or something, so tonight and tomorrow I'll be standing by to take him to the doctor if need be. 😕 I'm not feeling the best either. And our sink backed up this evening, so hopefully our quick fix will be okay for now. It's never dull, is it? 😜 Love you guys!! ❤️ 5 Quote SKY ELVENWORD NOBLEHEART The Silver Archer, Ranger Level 53 Jesus-follower | Writer | Encourager | Resident Myers-Briggs and Enneagram Geek "Knowing that we can be loved exactly as we are gives us all the best opportunity for growing into the healthiest of people." - Fred Rogers Link to comment
Rhovaniel Posted March 28 Report Share Posted March 28 7 hours ago, SkyGirl said: Today the anxiety is really setting in and I'm getting really nervous about my appointments ... and while I'm tempted to be embarrassed or downplay those feelings, I'm not going to. ❤️ Starting a new medication is scary, especially when you've never taken it before and don't know how it might affect you. Not to mention, when there are so many horror stories about terrible side effects, taking ages to find the right medication, etc. So, I'm trying to be kind to myself, like I would to a friend. ❤️ It is scary, and I am super proud of you. If it helps, not everyone has awful side effects or takes a long time to find the right medication. Being prepared doesn't hurt, but don't forget to be open to the possibility that the first one, or second, might be what works. And IF it does, then it does and it becomes an exercise in learning to listen to and understand your body, right? 7 hours ago, SkyGirl said: It's never dull, is it? 😜 Nope! Hope both you and Eamon feel better soon *hugs* 1 Quote “All You Have To Decide Is What To Do With The Time That Is Given To You.” - Gandalf The Chronicles of Rhovaniel, Dúnedain Ranger: Volume One: Wintering, Volume Two: Winter is Passing, Spring is Near, The Chronicles of Rhovaniel, Volume Three: Reborn into Spring, Rhovaniel Batltes the PEWS (late spring challenge)| Volume Four: Strength in Summer|Volume Five: Ambushed in the Archives (current) Spoiler Previous Challenges: 1|2|3|4|5|6|7|8|9|10|11|12|13 14| 15|16|17|18|19|20|21|22|23|24|25|26|27| 28 29|30 Link to comment
Whisper Posted March 28 Report Share Posted March 28 11 hours ago, SkyGirl said: Amazing that she might know what she's talking about. It always amazes me when a therapist says to do something that feels like it is too small and stupid to actually, but when I get over myself enough to actually do it, damn if they aren't right. I hope Eamon is starts feeling better soon. 1 Quote We are not sinners trespassing in the garden of an angry God. We are prodigals come home; fully seen and deeply loved. Put together enough small wins over a long enough period of time, and you’ll find yourself in high level gear fighting dragons before you know it. Spoiler Unused for now, Quest Log: Not Silence in the Library but a Whisper in the Academy Link to comment
SkyGirl Posted March 29 Author Report Share Posted March 29 14 hours ago, Rhovaniel said: It is scary, and I am super proud of you. If it helps, not everyone has awful side effects or takes a long time to find the right medication. Being prepared doesn't hurt, but don't forget to be open to the possibility that the first one, or second, might be what works. And IF it does, then it does and it becomes an exercise in learning to listen to and understand your body, right? Thank you Rho! I'm so good at preparing for the worst-case scenario that I usually forget to prepare for the best. I feel like I ought to write that down somewhere. 11 hours ago, Whisper said: It always amazes me when a therapist says to do something that feels like it is too small and stupid to actually, but when I get over myself enough to actually do it, damn if they aren't right. Right?? The storm of anxiety feels so big that surely a little nap won't help - but lo and behold, my brain is still a body part and it still benefits from taking a break. 14 hours ago, Rhovaniel said: Hope both you and Eamon feel better soon *hugs* 11 hours ago, Whisper said: I hope Eamon is starts feeling better soon. Welllllll soooooo ....... unexpectedly and also unsurprisingly, Eamon does not have bronchitis. We've had COVID three or four times and this is the first time we've actually had a positive at-home test. We totally thought it was bad allergies or an upper respiratory infection, and were totally blindsided by the positive test; but as the day's gone on I recognize the lethargy, brain fog, and low-grade chills. Eamon has more severe, classic symptoms and feels pretty horrible, so we're keeping a close eye on his fever and lungs and I'm still standing by to take him to urgent care or the ER if needed. What a mess. And of course, my appointments are tomorrow and I'm sick. I didn't reschedule them yet - since they're both telehealth appointments, all I need to do is be well enough (or medicated enough) to drive across the state line (to where they're both licensed), sit in a parking lot somewhere and do the appointments, and then come home. If I wake up tomorrow feeling much worse, I can still reschedule and eat the late fees; but ... if I miss these, that means I'll have to go even longer psyching myself out and having to work up the courage to go again. So I'm going to do my very best to make it, unless I'm too feverish or woozy to drive. But ... yeah, it's still never dull. Maybe it's a blessing - I'll be focused on feeling like crap and so maybe won't be quite so freaked out by the appointment. A blessing in disguise? 🤷♀️ No exercise today because I mostly wanted to either sleep or stare at a wall, lol. I did eat some veggies and fruit juice, and I accepted my boss's offer to sign off early and rest instead of pushing myself to get to the end of the workday. ❤️ And outside of health, we have a tour scheduled for one of the houses we're interested in (after we're well, obviously), and lots of nice things are happening in my larger friend and family circle, which feels nice after a pretty stressful period lately. Time to go chill with some crochet or online shopping, and take my evening Advil in hopes of better sleep. I'll let you know how tomorrow goes!! 4 Quote SKY ELVENWORD NOBLEHEART The Silver Archer, Ranger Level 53 Jesus-follower | Writer | Encourager | Resident Myers-Briggs and Enneagram Geek "Knowing that we can be loved exactly as we are gives us all the best opportunity for growing into the healthiest of people." - Fred Rogers Link to comment
Tanktimus the Encourager Posted March 29 Report Share Posted March 29 Dang, I hope you both heal soon. 1 Quote Current Challenge "By the Most-Righteous-and-Blessed Beard of Sir Tanktimus the Encourager!" - Jarl Rurik Harrgath Link to comment
Rhovaniel Posted March 29 Report Share Posted March 29 Oof, that is rough. Hope you both get plenty of rest and the darn plague leaves you soon! 1 Quote “All You Have To Decide Is What To Do With The Time That Is Given To You.” - Gandalf The Chronicles of Rhovaniel, Dúnedain Ranger: Volume One: Wintering, Volume Two: Winter is Passing, Spring is Near, The Chronicles of Rhovaniel, Volume Three: Reborn into Spring, Rhovaniel Batltes the PEWS (late spring challenge)| Volume Four: Strength in Summer|Volume Five: Ambushed in the Archives (current) Spoiler Previous Challenges: 1|2|3|4|5|6|7|8|9|10|11|12|13 14| 15|16|17|18|19|20|21|22|23|24|25|26|27| 28 29|30 Link to comment
Salinger Posted March 29 Report Share Posted March 29 Hey Sky, sorry just seen your thread! Proud of you .... really really hope you can make the appointments - do let us know. Hope you and Eamon dont get worse sick either Sending love to you both xx 1 Quote Link to comment
SkyGirl Posted March 29 Author Report Share Posted March 29 I confess I was really hoping to be sick enough to cancel my appointments today, but ... alas, I am not. 😝 Jumping in the car now, my heart going 2000 bpm and filled with dread - but I'm Ranger and I am courageous, dang it!! 2 5 Quote SKY ELVENWORD NOBLEHEART The Silver Archer, Ranger Level 53 Jesus-follower | Writer | Encourager | Resident Myers-Briggs and Enneagram Geek "Knowing that we can be loved exactly as we are gives us all the best opportunity for growing into the healthiest of people." - Fred Rogers Link to comment
Ranger Hal Posted March 29 Report Share Posted March 29 6 minutes ago, SkyGirl said: but I'm Ranger and I am courageous, dang it!! Yes!!! 1 Quote Challenges: #1, #2, #3, #4, #5, #6, #7, #8, #9, #10, #11, #12, #13, #14, #15, #16, #17, #18, #19, #20, #21, #22, #23, #24, #25, #26, #27, #28, Current Walk to Mordor: 2019, 2020, 2021, 2022, 2023 Link to comment
Salinger Posted March 29 Report Share Posted March 29 9 minutes ago, SkyGirl said: I confess I was really hoping to be sick enough to cancel my appointments today, but ... alas, I am not. 😝 Jumping in the car now, my heart going 2000 bpm and filled with dread - but I'm Ranger and I am courageous, dang it!! Deep breathes, we are all holding your hand x 1 Quote Link to comment
Tanktimus the Encourager Posted March 29 Report Share Posted March 29 2 hours ago, SkyGirl said: I confess I was really hoping to be sick enough to cancel my appointments today, but ... alas, I am not. 😝 Jumping in the car now, my heart going 2000 bpm and filled with dread - but I'm Ranger and I am courageous, dang it!! Ranger's gonna Ranger! 1 Quote Current Challenge "By the Most-Righteous-and-Blessed Beard of Sir Tanktimus the Encourager!" - Jarl Rurik Harrgath Link to comment
SkyGirl Posted March 30 Author Report Share Posted March 30 HAHAHAHAHAHA OKAY Y'ALL NONE OF THAT WENT HOW I EXPECTED AT ALL Sooooooo the recap version is: My car battery died during my first appointment, meaning it was super hot inside my car throughout both appointments, meaning my phone overheated and shut itself down so I missed half the therapy appointment ... plus I was late for the therapy appointment because of the medication appointment and almost got written up because the secretary didn't pass along my message that I'd be late ... PLUS the phobia therapist was much more excited to talk about pregnancy and show me photos of her kids and share horror stories about the stomach viruses they get, than she was to actually talk about how to treat my phobia ... PLUS the car battery was so corroded when the roadside tech arrived that I had to go to AutoZone and get a new battery installed before I could drive home. And to top it all off, I was supposed to start my medication tonight, but the psychiatrist's prescription didn't go through. 🙃 So ... the net result for the day was ... a new car battery. And a splitting headache. Honestly, everything's fine. The prescription will come through (and of course, I didn't want to start it tonight anyway, because I don't want to start it at all, I'm only doing it because I need it); I'll figure out if the phobia therapist is worth trying again; and honestly my attitude about the whole thing was remarkably calm because I had a lovely devotion/meditation this morning that centered me perfectly for a crazy day. ❤️ I'm glad I went and didn't put it off, even if it didn't go AT ALL like I expected. I came home and rehydrated (I didn't bring water with me and it was very hot in the car), and ordered pizza, because Eamon is still pretty seriously sick and neither of us felt like cooking. ❤️ His lungs aren't doing so hot and we're still monitoring him closely. Breathing steam, etc. are helping a bit, and his fever seems to be gone, so fingers crossed he'll heal up fast. ❤️ ... that's all I got, my head is aching and I'm going to go get pajamas on. THANK YOU!!! SO MUCH!!! for your lovely words of encouragement on the way in - I knew you were with me and it made a WORLD of difference!! 6 Quote SKY ELVENWORD NOBLEHEART The Silver Archer, Ranger Level 53 Jesus-follower | Writer | Encourager | Resident Myers-Briggs and Enneagram Geek "Knowing that we can be loved exactly as we are gives us all the best opportunity for growing into the healthiest of people." - Fred Rogers Link to comment
Rhovaniel Posted March 30 Report Share Posted March 30 12 hours ago, SkyGirl said: Honestly, everything's fine. The prescription will come through (and of course, I didn't want to start it tonight anyway, because I don't want to start it at all, I'm only doing it because I need it); I'll figure out if the phobia therapist is worth trying again; and honestly my attitude about the whole thing was remarkably calm because I had a lovely devotion/meditation this morning that centered me perfectly for a crazy day. ❤️ I'm glad I went and didn't put it off, even if it didn't go AT ALL like I expected. Super proud of you. Sometimes the Universe laughs and you gotta roll with it. I am glad you can get the meds though. Fingers crossed you and Eamonn make speedy recoveries 2 Quote “All You Have To Decide Is What To Do With The Time That Is Given To You.” - Gandalf The Chronicles of Rhovaniel, Dúnedain Ranger: Volume One: Wintering, Volume Two: Winter is Passing, Spring is Near, The Chronicles of Rhovaniel, Volume Three: Reborn into Spring, Rhovaniel Batltes the PEWS (late spring challenge)| Volume Four: Strength in Summer|Volume Five: Ambushed in the Archives (current) Spoiler Previous Challenges: 1|2|3|4|5|6|7|8|9|10|11|12|13 14| 15|16|17|18|19|20|21|22|23|24|25|26|27| 28 29|30 Link to comment
shaar Posted March 30 Report Share Posted March 30 OH MY GOD Sky what a DAY!!!!! Holy crapcakes BUT Look at how frickin' cool and collected you were with all of the chaos thrown your way trying to derail you!! You did it and survived and kicked that day's ass, and you are a serious rockstar. ❤️❤️ I hope Eamon feels better today too! FRICK OFF COVID UGH 2 Quote i am not waiting for a hero. i saved myself long ago. Level 58 Bard & Monk of the Furious Heart STR.55 DEX.43 STA.48 CON.51 WIS.53 CHA.65 "Well...in the end, it boils down to two simple choices. Either you do or you don't. You'd think with all the problems in this world, there'd be more answers. It's not fair... ...But that's the way things are. The choice is yours." Link to comment
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