Osu

[Jupiter]

4 hours ago, Kishi said:

Also also, gotta work on plotting out the novel. I've got a magic system that I want (finally!), but I need to figure out how the rest of this is going to actually, you know, uh, go. This week's goal is to flesh out characters somewhat, and next week is the actual plotting of the story, but that means I have to actually use my time well and not spend my lunch break browsing the news.

 

I feel like plotting is one of the most interesting and yet hardest parts of writing LOL. Good luck and have fun.  

 

Edited: If you need/want any tips, let me know.  

[Kishi]

19 hours ago, Jupiter said:

 

I feel like plotting is one of the most interesting and yet hardest parts of writing LOL. Good luck and have fun.  

 

Edited: If you need/want any tips, let me know.  

 

I will! So far, my biggest obstacle is a discipline problem. Really not giving myself the BIC time I need to make this work.

 

*

 

Refigured the central story question given how the story's come to work better, and also tweaked male protagonist's initial character dossier. Good stuff.

 

Tuesday was a busy day physically. Went and played BJJ for an hour where we worked on an over-the-shoulder toss from the ground. I've actually had the chance to experience this one from standing; you basically grab a sleeve and hold it low, reach around for the other one's belt, and then sort of dive your feet underneath and roll them over your shoulder from your front. If you do it from standing, you wind up on top of them in side control, and because this was my practice, this was where I found myself, although I was supposed to be taking the other guy's back. I was able to pull it off in randori afterwards, but only because the other guy was nice enough to let me.

 

As it was, though, I still had fun rolling. Got smashed, to be clear, but got smashed in a lot of different ways and even managed some more dynamic defenses in terms of rolling my body with leverage rather than staying stuck against it. As the low man on the totem pole, this was an appropriate performance.

 

Striking afterward was pretty heavy on front leg roundhouse to disrupt forward momentum. I didn't do so well with that. Managed to stuff a guy who does this weird jab-uppercut-jab on the same hand combination to keep me back, but only did so once because I pulled it off so well that I stiff-jabbed him in the face and immediately felt terrible. Need to get over myself and just get in with these people and start playing because this whole staying outside and trying to clock the jab thing (waiting for it to be out and then shooting in as it retracts) is not working for me. And they are losing their respect for my right hand. This needs must be corrected.

 

Anyway, tonight will be booze and food and feeeeeeelings, and I'm all about it.

[Urgan]

1 hour ago, Kishi said:

If you do it from standing, you wind up on top of them in side control, and because this was my practice, this was where I found myself, although I was supposed to be taking the other guy's back. I was able to pull it off in randori afterwards, but only because the other guy was nice enough to let me.

 

Thank God for helpful partners helping us hurt them better.

[Mistr]

Catching up with all the fascinating discussion in your thread.

 

On 10/8/2019 at 1:22 PM, analoggirl said:

(Eff that advice that men have to learn how to say "Yes darling" in order to have a happy marriage. My opinion, will not judge people that think that way.)

 

When Dumbledore and I got legal, our already-married friends told us there were two phrases we both needed to learn.

 

"Yes, dear"  and "Nothing, dear"

 

On 10/8/2019 at 4:35 PM, analoggirl said:

Communication. Clarity. Not necessarily talking out evrry detail but the core issues before they become a problem. Not just (in my view, and I know it sounds judgemental) lazily accepting we are like Venus and Mars and not even trying to understand each other and adapting Around our seeming differences.

 

This is true, especially the "not necessarily talking out every detail" part. The phrases "yes, dear" and "nothing, dear" are tremendously useful in reminding you to choose your battles. There are lots of little things that don't need to be hashed out. Sometimes your day will be better if you just go along with what your spouse wants. Other times you want to just take care of the thing yourself and don't want your spouse to get involved. The key is in knowing what needs to be negotiated and when is a good time to actually do the negotiation. Hint: not after 10pm when you are both stressed out.

 

 

On 10/9/2019 at 5:11 PM, Kishi said:

Not to mention the different languages of affection that people use to communicate with one another. Throw that into the mix with a bunch of socialized expectations that vary from culture to culture and it Gets Complicated Fast.

 

But in other news, to hell with it. We gotta try, yeah?

 

Yes, this is always a challenge. One useful phrase both for relationships and general use is "When you say X, do you mean Y, or maybe Z?". I don't know about anyone else, but I have gotten in a lot of arguments where Dumbledore said "I told you X!" and I respond "yes, and I did that!". Then we figure out that my definition of "X" is considerably different from his. After many years of this, I've learned to say "just to make sure we are on the same page, I think you mean ...".

 

Assuming that just because two people share a native language they mean the same thing is a trap.

[Kishi]

23 hours ago, Urgan said:

 

Thank God for helpful partners helping us hurt them better.

 

Right? Like you need resistance in order to learn the technique, but only so much.

 

11 minutes ago, Mistr said:

Yes, this is always a challenge. One useful phrase both for relationships and general use is "When you say X, do you mean Y, or maybe Z?". I don't know about anyone else, but I have gotten in a lot of arguments where Dumbledore said "I told you X!" and I respond "yes, and I did that!". Then we figure out that my definition of "X" is considerably different from his. After many years of this, I've learned to say "just to make sure we are on the same page, I think you mean ...".

 

Assuming that just because two people share a native language they mean the same thing is a trap.

 

Ooh, that is super useful. It's actually something I'm having to use at work now a lot, but I definitely walk around assuming that other people mean the same thing as me.

 

Also, hey, I need to correct something - I totally didn't say "Thank You" to you when I was making my thanks earlier to everyone. I owe you that because you're super busy and have lots of things to do but you still make time to come by and deal with my silliness. I hope things have been good to you where you are.

 

*

 

So! Remember my great plan about spending more of my lunch break working on characters and stuff?

 

Yeah didn't happen. Y'all might recall, about a couple months ago, new supervisor and new coworker got into a dust-up with each other? It happened again, and this time I was asked to help document it, so I spent my lunch writing up an incident report explaining the situation as well as I knew it.

 

So that was a thing. Drama in the work place, fun. Not sure if this is a workplace democracy problem or an attitude problem between two coworkers, one of whom happens to be a supervisor. Having had some time to sit and watch, kind of feels more like the latter to me, hence my willingness to document rather than take the coworker's side of it.

 

I suppose we'll see what happens.

 

Food and drink and feels happened as we wrapped up S3 of Young Justice. It's super dope, y'all, but you don't want to walk into this one with spoilers. The ending was an interesting choice; it definitely worked in the moment, and while I've gone back and forth with myself over it since then, I do think it works overall. Kind of feels like a lesson on what constitutes high stakes in storytelling.

 

Tonight, no training. The Lady is coming to Raleigh this time for the Night Market, which I've been jonesing to go back to for a while anyway. There is a part of me that wants to know where this is going, and there's a part of me that doesn't really care as long as we get to keep seeing each other. How will this play out? Again, I suppose we'll see. I guess as long as I avoid asking PUA questions, I'm probably going to be okay.

[Renate]

6 hours ago, Mistr said:

Catching up with all the fascinating discussion in your thread.

 

 

When Dumbledore and I got legal, our already-married friends told us there were two phrases we both needed to learn.

 

"Yes, dear"  and "Nothing, dear"

 

 

This is true, especially the "not necessarily talking out every detail" part. The phrases "yes, dear" and "nothing, dear" are tremendously useful in reminding you to choose your battles. There are lots of little things that don't need to be hashed out. Sometimes your day will be better if you just go along with what your spouse wants. Other times you want to just take care of the thing yourself and don't want your spouse to get involved. The key is in knowing what needs to be negotiated and when is a good time to actually do the negotiation. Hint: not after 10pm when you are both stressed out.

 

 

 

Yes, this is always a challenge. One useful phrase both for relationships and general use is "When you say X, do you mean Y, or maybe Z?". I don't know about anyone else, but I have gotten in a lot of arguments where Dumbledore said "I told you X!" and I respond "yes, and I did that!". Then we figure out that my definition of "X" is considerably different from his. After many years of this, I've learned to say "just to make sure we are on the same page, I think you mean ...".

 

Assuming that just because two people share a native language they mean the same thing is a trap.

 

Agree with all of what you said (assuming your X is my X haha )

 

The problem is that lots of people just do not feel like arguing even important points because they figure it will al just end up being a mess becausw they do not know to effectivsly communicate.

 

Indeed NOT after 10pm when you are both stressed out, but find time to talk about it if time does not make it resolve itself (A LOT of things do, though, as long as you do not draw lines in the sand and look out for each other).

 

I think we are on the same page.

 

I just warn my partner MANY TIMES to not simply endure,

 

Because statistically, women are the ones who ask for divorce more often. And (have to find the source) psychological research says it is Not because men are more often happy in marriages, but because they prefer the comfort of a relationship. Again, have to find a resource but men cheat statistically more, women ask for a divorce more often.

 

I tell him: I prefer it if you tell me if you grow apathic towards me or have to endure me more often than not. Then I can either work on it as much as I can, or free you to go find a partner more suitable for yourself. 

 

Might not work for everyone, but for us it works marvelously to keep on courting each other with, in the back of our minds, the realisation that no relationship is waterproof. (miiiight be because both of our parents are divorced so we know what a TERRIBLE emotional and expensive hassle a divorce is.) Again, something that colors my view point.

 

in our case, it does not make us timid to invest in each other, we just keep on acting with the mind set that we can BOTH manage fine without the other, we BOTH can find someone else if the othee person stops trying.

 

so we need to keep adding value to each other's lives. And honestly I have never felt so secure because this pragmatic approach gives our romantic relationship a base that simple words and promises would not give me. I kind of feel like guys within 10 years of my age feel like they have to escalate words because they think women want to hear something out of a romance novel.... But that's me & my assumptions. Based on my (limited relative to the sum total of world population) interraction with women and men on both sides   But FOR ME judging each other based on deeds rather than words + open communication when needed + above mentality has been working so far. Will see if it or our concrete application needs adjustment with time.

 

NB/PS - I realise the above is not well sourced, not nuanced, just ramblings in the train after an exam. Feel free to ignore!! Aka: I am being lazy with my reply to you, while you bothered to write out a well worded response to my post. Ahhh. No, I won't just delete a big chunk again haha. I will offer my excuses instead.

[Urgan]

20 hours ago, analoggirl said:

The problem is that lots of people just do not feel like arguing even important points because they figure it will al just end up being a mess becausw they do not know to effectivsly communicate.

 

Not to take away a jot from your point, but this made me lol. Yes I am the worst.

 

22 hours ago, Mistr said:

Hint: not after 10pm when you are both stressed out.

 

20 hours ago, analoggirl said:

Indeed NOT after 10pm when you are both stressed out, but find time to talk about it if time does not make it resolve itself (A LOT of things do, though, as long as you do not draw lines in the sand and look out for each other).

 

What do you mean? 10PM is the best time to have it out or even just take pot shots--that way one person sleeps like a baby and the other person is wired for hours! Glorious. 

 

22 hours ago, Mistr said:

When Dumbledore and I got legal, our already-married friends told us there were two phrases we both needed to learn.

 

"Yes, dear"  and "Nothing, dear"

 

I had the dubious honor of hearing my then-boyfriend advised by his (divorced, living alone in a trailer on a steep hill in the middle of nowhere) father to this effect while taking him home. Yes, with me in the car right there. I did my best to tell him this was really bad advice without ripping FIL-to-be a new one. It was an Interesting Time.

[Mistr]

I gotta say that I can't remember the last time one of us said "yes, dear" or "nothing dear" other than for comic effect.

 

Certainly there have been plenty of times when I decided that keeping my mouth shut was the best course of action. If I notice a pattern of things that bothers me, we are going to talk about it. Neither Dumbledore nor I are willing to put up with much.

 

I clearly remember talking with Dumbledore about the need for "yellow lights" on issues. There is class of behavior that is okay once, okay twice, but annoying as a general pattern. What was happening was that I'd be going along my merry way doing the thing the way I thought was fine, then he'd yell at me for it. I'd feel blindsided and paranoid. What other perfectly normal activity would set him off next? He agreed that it wasn't fair to go from fine to angry with no communication in the middle. I had to face the same issue from my side because I'd been culturated to believe that women should put up with a lot of BS.

 

Also note that communication skills are LEARNED BEHAVIOR. People do not automatically know how to negotiate, or even to express their feelings. Some people grow up in environments where it is actively dangerous to express feelings or preferences. Chances are slim that two people in a relationship grew up with the same cultural expectations on communication. This is an area that typically requires a lot of work to avoid conflict.

 

Sorry for hijacking your thread @Kishi. I hope there are some bits here that are useful for you.

[Renate]

17 hours ago, Urgan said:

Not to take away a jot from your point, but this made me lol. Yes I am the worst.

Glad you could lol :p I kept making those typos and it was taking ages to write it out, especially because I do see my English in general is not the best lately but I do not know how to correct myself anymore either (without looking up every grammar rule and word). So glad you were not frustrated with reading it as I was writing it. Yes, I admit to just leaving them in there. Guilty as charged...

[Renate]

20 hours ago, Mistr said:

Also note that communication skills are LEARNED BEHAVIOR. People do not automatically know how to negotiate, or even to express their feelings. Some people grow up in environments where it is actively dangerous to express feelings or preferences. Chances are slim that two people in a relationship grew up with the same cultural expectations on communication. This is an area that typically requires a lot of work to avoid conflict.

This. Agreed. (EDIT: my previous and my comment below were not to criticise what you and the gentleman are doing, I would not have done otherwise. And even if I had, I do not believe my opinion about other people's lives and relationship matters, even if I have one. Hope it did not sound like I was making assumptions or accusative!)

 

It is not even the worse, dangerous situations that shut people away from having fruitful communication.

 

My family (also grandparents) has hierarchy but there was an open line of communication always. I grew up free to ask about the rationale behind my parents' decisions. I was also able to ask (and get a serious answer or an 'I do not know, I will look it up for you and try to explain in a manner appropriate for a 3 /7 / 14 year old) about topics ranging from why there is a day and night to pregnancy and sexuality.

 

And STILL both my mother and grandmother bit their tongue until stuff was unbearable anymore, on some topics. (Granddad and I have very similar temperaments & ways of problem solving.) My grandmother accompanied her frustration with biting comments, UNRELATED outbursts and denial that something was wrong. I spent many conversations (after she had calmed down) talking with her that IT IS OKAY to talk with us, this is a safe environment, we care for you & your thoughts and feelings AND THIS is how you can communicate effectively... And work towards a win-win scenario... and since a couple of years it seems like she does not hold anything in anymore (in the bad sense) 

 

Have had similar coaching sessions with my mom. She always used to help EVERYONE in her environment, miraculously making time even when she worked full-time with a kid (me), often receives little in return when she need a helping hand (everyone is busy).

 

Pretended she was not hurt when they did not help her. Now she has started saying what's on her heart without feeling guilty but PHRASED in a way that does not make her friends feel bad either (or for too long anyways). Sometimes she would HINT at stuff instead of being direct because she herself is very sensitive to hints for help but not everyone is... The ones that Free Rided have stopped calling her but the good ones stayed. Of course, that is my interpretation. But she is much happier. (Of course both of these things is not all Thanks To Me, they did so much reflection and I have learnt so much from them too...)

 

I also had a thing with my bf, but on my side. (It is weird calling someone your bf when he is older than 25 but oh well.) I am quite sensitive to other people, though I have learnt to sort when something stems from my behaviour and when not. He has a conflict avoiding personality (just like me). Not that he is shy or silent, he just sorts A LOT of things under the "no need to spend energy on" category. When I noticed he was getting increasingly annoyed with indeed, FOR ME normal behaviour. 

 

I told him that 1) this stuff can build up if I keep doing them and 2) if he does not tell me, I will wonder what else I am (not) doing that is bothering him and thus have less energy to spend on productive and fun things with him. So it is good AND efficient use of his time to talk about the things that bother him :p

 

Idk. I feel like my philosophies & principles do work, but it is difficult to explain without concrete examples & there are more ways to Rome than just mine.

 

EDIT: Also apologise for hijacking the thread, Kishi 

 

Since I feel like I am spending more time on getting my thoughts OUT to share and discuss with you all, rather than taking the time to edit and word everything properly and more succinctly, I have to conclude that it is better to stop my input in this discussion or at least not to type a WALL of text every time!  Thanks for the conversation, everyone. 

[Kishi]

Hey y'all.

 

Relax. It's cool.

 

I don't mind my thread being a place where people can come to talk about things. If I could set out coffee/tea and good beer/wine/spirits and other such things, I totally would. But alas. This is the Internet. Y'all just have to take my heart on the matter and let it be enough.

 

*

 

So! Been a couple days. Let's catch it up.

 

Went to go see the Lady at the Night Market. We got beers, wandered, and just talked. Got together about 1915 and didn't part 'til about 0200 the next morning, and that time passed like nothing. We covered a lot of ground together and I felt like there was more to cover and it was fun to do so.

 

Anyway, between that and what I felt was a fight getting ready to brew again between the supervisor and the co-worker, I pretty much just noped out of work the next day. Didn't really hit any training beyond open mat. This Friday in particular wound up being a weird night. Ky-sensei was out celebrating his wife's birthday, so even though Fight Night had been posted, when I got there, nobody had showed up. I waited for a bit before deciding to take off and get beer for Coach over at the other open mat, except that he wasn't in town (which he'd told us about; I just forgot) and nobody else really made it out except for one of my fellow white belts. We've begun giving each other nicknames, so now I'm confident calling the one Squirrel and the other one Skills, as even though I can beat her pretty handily most of the time, she picks things up faster than I do and very often she helps to teach me. So Skills showed up and played with me for a bit. I was lazy with my rolls last night as a lot of my explosive movements aggravates whatever the hell it is that's going on down in my glute/hip/hamstring area. As a result, we rolled really easy with each other and she got the chance to get me a few times, and I got her one time on pure technique. I honestly walked out of it feeling pretty satisfied with how it all ended up.

 

I told myself I'd do some additional strength work, but I'm forced to concede that deloads like I was thinking of are probably a bridge too far for the program I'm doing now. But I was still feeling pretty burnt out, so I decided to trust myself and just take the rest of the night off. I don't regret it, but I have to admit it does feel kind of weird. But deloads are a good thing for me, and it could just be that I wind up taking a week every 4-6 to just "punch the clock" and do the bare minimum. I dunno. We'll see.

 

Today, the only thing I really mean to do is to test out my KB snatch and see about entering that into rotation for Q&D going forward. Tomorrow, no class on account of both teachers being out. I might invite Skills and Squirrel to come roll anyway, but TBH I'm pretty super chill about it one way or the other. This letting go of things is... nice.

[Kishi]

So! Snatch testing did not happen. It was a wet, rainy weekend, and the only space I have to do this thing is outdoors. So no dice. Bah. OTOH, I can probably start doing things like working jumps and banded swings into the rotation; I can assign numbers on the dice to that and it be no problem at all.

 

Also, apparently the Karate fight night was moved to Saturday night and I misread the invite. That didn't feel good, especially since apparently nobody showed up.

 

Instead, I did find my way back to doing some strength work. Basically halved my reps and dropped my cadence as opposed to trying to do lighter variants and this actually felt good - like I was showing up but not killing myself, you know? That, I suspect is a "true deload" on this program and probably doable going forward.

 

I'm thinking that going forward, I'm probably going to just do strength work twice per week as opposed to three times. Given everything else I'm doing and my need to heal proper, this is probably a good compromise, and I've had good results before on a schedule like this where it's twice a week with finishers. Quick, full body trainings with short finishers should be fine.

 

Also, at the end of the session, I accidentally rediscovered twisting as a stretch and it caused those deep muscles to feel loads better. So, uh. Maybe take that as a sign?

 

Sunday we got messages from the coaches that said that we didn't have to train on Sunday but we were definitely invited to do so. So I messaged back and said I'd go open the place up and roll with whoever showed. Nobody showed, so I did solo drills instead for a while, which felt pretty good. At least everyone knows I tried.

 

Which brings us to today. Deload definitely did me some good and I'm rearing to go. Handstand work and Q&D tonight; emphasis is shifting over to catching my wrist strength up for a bit. Sidebar - I've been watching cooking YouTube for a minute now and I've learned that I've been holding my chef's knife wrong when doing my cutting work. Made one small adjustment and my wrist, which has had its tweaks and pains, is feeling loads better. Funny how small things make such a big difference.

[Urgan]

38 minutes ago, Kishi said:

Also, apparently the Karate fight night was moved to Saturday night and I misread the invite. That didn't feel good, especially since apparently nobody showed up.

 

In the end nobody came on Saturday either?

 

39 minutes ago, Kishi said:

Instead, I did find my way back to doing some strength work. Basically halved my reps and dropped my cadence as opposed to trying to do lighter variants and this actually felt good - like I was showing up but not killing myself, you know? That, I suspect is a "true deload" on this program and probably doable going forward.

 

Yeah, "deload" is not the same thing as "unload". An unload looks a lot like detraining...

[Kishi]

4 minutes ago, Urgan said:

In the end nobody came on Saturday either?

 

I'm inferring it. I didn't go on Saturday, but I saw a post talking about how it was cancelled, and I'm assuming that was because nobody showed up.

 

4 minutes ago, Urgan said:

Yeah, "deload" is not the same thing as "unload". An unload looks a lot like detraining...

 

Yeah, and that's what it felt like too. Funny how that works.

[Urgan]

3 minutes ago, Kishi said:

I'm inferring it. I didn't go on Saturday, but I saw a post talking about how it was cancelled, and I'm assuming that was because nobody showed up.

 

If you misread it, maybe others did too? Or else Saturday is a no-go for most people? I know it takes an act of God to get me to the occasional Friday class.

[Kishi]

56 minutes ago, Urgan said:

 

If you misread it, maybe others did too? Or else Saturday is a no-go for most people? I know it takes an act of God to get me to the occasional Friday class.

 

Probably a little bit of both. I've gone to Saturday fight nights before and those suckers are dead. They can be good in terms of hanging out with the one or two odd folk who show up but you're not going to get a wide variety of people.

 

Also, I'm not certain, but I saw someone driving into the school's parking lot on Friday night as I was driving out and I can't help but think that others must have misread in the same way.

[Urgan]

4 minutes ago, Kishi said:

Probably a little bit of both. I've gone to Saturday fight nights before and those suckers are dead. They can be good in terms of hanging out with the one or two odd folk who show up but you're not going to get a wide variety of people.

 

Also, I'm not certain, but I saw someone driving into the school's parking lot on Friday night as I was driving out and I can't help but think that others must have misread in the same way.

 

Sometimes we just gotta face facts--ain't supposed to die on a Saturday night.

 

 

[Kishi]

So, it wound up being a Q&D only kind of night. I took a look into the next steps for handstand work and the mobility apparently requires like a 20 lb bar or something? And then I looked into my program's take on handstands and it turns out the designer actually has his own approach that's designed to work in concert with the program. And I was like "LOL done." There's no reason for more work than I have to do and I've had enough bad luck mixing and matching programs before that I don't need to keep walking down this road if there's another way.

 

So. Q&D. Notable for the fact that I'm now able to fire off push ups without a band helping me out. Deep muscle in my glute/ham region felt good and felt even better today, which I take for a good sign.

 

I'm not sure what tonight's training looks like. It's gonna be some kind of BJJ for sure, but Coach has specifically mentioned he's back in town and open to train, and I kind of feel like I owe it to him? But the space is going to be taken up by boxing tonight IIRC, and it might not be available. Also, he may need to be there for his family after all his travel, and if that's so then I would go to the other place and get some BJJ and some kickboxing on. Either way, strength work to follow.

 

With handstands gone and the strength work reduced, what I'm hoping to do is kind of spread my S&C work farther out to allow for more rest. So Q&D Monday and Thursday, calisthenics Tuesday and Friday, with Wednesday, Saturday, and Sunday either given to rest or recreational movement. This'll vary somewhat depending on what happens with Fridays, but as a general template I think it's probably pretty solid.

[Kishi]

So, turned out Coach planned to be back in town, but wasn't actually. His travel arrangements screwed up and he wasn't able to make it. So I went and rolled at the other place instead.

 

It was good stuff. More work on triangle and arm bar. Rolled with a bunch of different bodies and different ranks, and no two people felt the same. Tapped one, got tapped a bunch of times, but also pulled some stuff off that surprised people, including a sweep on a wide-based blue belt who outweighs me by, like, a lot, which he really didn't see coming.

 

Kickboxing also went well. Stopped trying to time things and decided to just get in and dance, and that turned out to be way better as far as strategy goes.

 

Strength work followed all that. The deload week appears to have done me good. Generally, I do a lot of focus on lift tempo - 3 seconds down, 1 second up - as well as more reps. I dropped both of those for the deload, but coming back I felt strong and explosive. Finisher was one-armed KB swing ladders, because that's the only way I can figure for such programming to make sense. And this wound up awesome; even with the 16, I found myself swinging to the point where I actually picked up a runner's cramp. That's never happened before. It was interesting.

 

Anyway, beyond that, I finally got to shave my head and I feel good and clean today. Tonight is a rest night; I'm out to take in a show with my friends and for the most part I'm just giving myself a break. I think it's gonna be fun.

[Urgan]

Just now, Kishi said:

So, turned out Coach planned to be back in town, but wasn't actually. His travel arrangements screwed up and he wasn't able to make it. So I went and rolled at the other place instead.

 

So...the takeaway from this week is spontaneous changes to dojo schedule are tantamount to cancellations. 

 

18 minutes ago, Kishi said:

It was good stuff. More work on triangle and arm bar. Rolled with a bunch of different bodies and different ranks, and no two people felt the same. Tapped one, got tapped a bunch of times, but also pulled some stuff off that surprised people, including a sweep on a wide-based blue belt who outweighs me by, like, a lot, which he really didn't see coming.

 

It's always a good day when you aren't as pin-able as the black belt assumes. Often I'm just as surprised as they are when this happens.

[Kishi]

17 minutes ago, Urgan said:

So...the takeaway from this week is spontaneous changes to dojo schedule are tantamount to cancellations.

 

Generally so, and generally that's how I run it. I dunno, I just felt that if I had the opportunity to practice with him that I should. I don't want this to get into some weird interpersonal political territory where I train so much under someone else that I become their student as opposed to my Coach's, you know?

 

Also, I feel really bad for the guy. He's essentially involved in some kind of consultancy work for the military, and they are running him pretty hard in terms of where and when he has to travel and such, and he has to do it as he has kids in college and he's gotta pay for that stuff. He apparently maxed out his travel obligations months ago, but somehow they found ways to force him to keep going. Booooo.

 

23 minutes ago, Urgan said:

It's always a good day when you aren't as pin-able as the black belt assumes. Often I'm just as surprised as they are when this happens.

 

Yup. To be clear, I was probably being given a lot of chances to work, but that doesn't take away from the fact that I did.

[Urgan]

10 minutes ago, Kishi said:

Generally so, and generally that's how I run it. I dunno, I just felt that if I had the opportunity to practice with him that I should. I don't want this to get into some weird interpersonal political territory where I train so much under someone else that I become their student as opposed to my Coach's, you know?

 

Also, I feel really bad for the guy. He's essentially involved in some kind of consultancy work for the military, and they are running him pretty hard in terms of where and when he has to travel and such, and he has to do it as he has kids in college and he's gotta pay for that stuff. He apparently maxed out his travel obligations months ago, but somehow they found ways to force him to keep going. Booooo.

 

An unfortunate situation, but he can't take it too personally if you're a regular and he isn't. This unreliable flaky crap seems to follow you around like strep throat at my cousins' house when all three kids were still living at their parents'. 

 

22 minutes ago, Kishi said:

Yup. To be clear, I was probably being given a lot of chances to work, but that doesn't take away from the fact that I did.

 

Knowing a good opportunity when you see it is a rarer skill than it ought to be.

[Kishi]

11 minutes ago, Urgan said:

An unfortunate situation, but he can't take it too personally if you're a regular and he isn't. This unreliable flaky crap seems to follow you around like strep throat at my cousins' house when all three kids were still living at their parents'.

 

And he doesn't! Or didn't. When he got in touch he said he was just glad I was out doing any kind of rolling at all. He's really chill about this kind of thing. Doesn't mean I don't wish things were different.

[Kishi]

Took in a show! Turned out that some acquaintances I'd made through friends of mine had joined together to make a band, and they were playing their opening show at a whiskey bar. I'd been told about this place before but had been under the assumption that it was far away; turns out it's actually about 5 minutes from where I live. It's this little hole in the wall place, but the bar is topnotch; apparently, they came 2nd in a regional competition over in Charlotte. Kind of curious about #1, but 2nd is fine with me.

 

But yeah. Good drink and good company. Made some new friends and went on home.

 

This week at work has been Employee Appreciation Week. We had a pizza lunch today, and I wound up sitting across from the Director of the agency. She asked how I was doing, as far as work is concerned. I told her. Remains to be seen whether it was wise or not.

 

Tonight should be martial arts and Q&D. "Time to roll the dice."

[Kishi]

So! Both of those things happened. I wound up going off to train with Coach as he was finally back in town. It was kind of sad, actually; when I got there, I saw that he was sitting in his car with the engine running, and I think if I hadn't got out and opened the place up that he might have taken off.

 

Or maybe I misread it. Who knows. It was good to see him again, though; got the chance to roll and get back into details again with a lot of what we're doing. The Blue Belt came in as well, so we got to work together and play with stuff. I dunno if y'all remember, but I mentioned that I was wanting to get back into Wim Hoff and see if his breathing method did anything for me here. Turns out, I've become a lot harder to choke than I used to be. You can still get me with airway chokes now, but blood chokes take a lot longer and a lot more effort to nail me with. I suspect my brain's just got used to going without fresh oxygen for a while, and blood chokes just feel like pressure to me now rather than something acutely dangerous.

 

I'm thinking that, going forward, I want to spend more time in my home gym when I can as opposed to the kickboxing gym. Reason being, I've returned to sharpness relatively quickly, and an hour of hard practice every week seems to be enough to keep me there (on top of shadowboxing and watching video breakdowns). Versus, with my teachers being so stuck on travel, I feel like I need to take time to be with them and help be a body for the program on top of studying and learning when I can.

 

Also, it seems our program is going to affiliate with a local Professor rather than the one my Coach came up under, as Coach has been passed up for promotion despite being more skillful than the Professor's other students. I can respect that. And apparently the Professor he's trying to get with is one of the better grapplers in the country, which is cool.

 

Q&D afterward was relatively uneventful.

 

Open mat tonight as well as strength work, maybe. If we end up drinking, it'll be off; I'll just find my way to doing that tomorrow.