Slouching towards fitness

[ThisRoughBeast]

Introduction

 

I'm a 26yr-old Dwarf woman. Tall for a Dwarf, at 5'4" (and three quarters!) and I weigh in at about 160lbs. You know how people say "big-boned" is just a euphamism for "fat" well, years ago (at a much lower weight) I had an oesteopath tell me I had big bones so take from that what you will. I think he meant a wide pelvic girdle and shoulders but IDEK.

 

My fitness level is zero. I smoke, I drink too much. I've had back problems since high-school. After seeing multiple professionals it has been established that the problems are muscular, not early onset oesteoperosis (YAY!). Basically, I have muscle knots, under muscle knots, under muscle knots. They stretch from my skull to my tailbone, front and back, and currently restrict the blood flow to my arms if I hold them in certain positions. Stopping the pulse in my wrist and asking people to find it is something I do at boring parties. According to the last few peeps I saw the muscles are also shortened around my chest and shoulders which makes straightening up, putting my shoulders back, and getting a nice deep breath hard to do. I breathe shallowly as a matter of course and the smoking doesn't help I'm sure.

 

So, I'm going to get massage therapy done once a week to help sort out my back, I've got a groupon for 10 zumba classes (thanks mum!) and I want to start doing bodyweight exercises. Also stretching. Lots and lots of stretching!

 

My nerd areas include fandom geekery, con going, games, D&D, being the resident "random information no one ever needs" guy (seriously, you want a treatise on the spotted heyena, or the changing trends in labour laws in the UK as related to the wars of the time, I'm your guy). I write, which doesn't help with the sendentary lifestyle, and I'm very excited about this website.

 

Vague Goals:

Get my back sorted

Quit smoking

Go to zumba once a week

Do beginner bodyweight exercises once a week until I can do 3 reps without dying, then level up

Don't get weird about food again

Join in the Adventurers challanges until I can join the Assassins.

 

So, that's me. I'll set up proper goals soon.

[Eats-Own-Tail]

hi and welcome

 

im trying to quit smoking too.

[Evicious]

Still trying to quit for good myself. Weekends are always a breeze (I'm not at work, so there's no reason to need a smoke break) - Mondays are monstrous. If you're interested, I think there's a quit-smoking thread around here somewhere..... Thumbs-up on the massage therapy and Zumba! I was a licensed MT prior to joining the Army; I miss all the "free" massages during classtime. And I just recently attended my SO's first 5K where they had a Zumba instructor lead a warm-up session for the racers. Crazy looking, but also looked super-fun! Keep us updated, TRB.

 

.....

 

Heheh.... TRB.... "Terbie".... Yeah, that's forever stuck in my head now.

[ThisRoughBeast]

Thanks Evicious and Lavender!

 

Yesterday I shovelled the driveway.

Today I had to do more shovelling and went toboggining for an hour. Now all parts of my body hurt, not just my arms and back. Still, I was able to do it, and at first I really didn't think I would be able to move all that freaking snow. But I did! A winner is me!

[marybelle]

That sounds really fun! Glad you found a fun way to get your workout in. Go you!

[Eats-Own-Tail]

yay, awesome

[ThisRoughBeast]

Wow. I am bad at this.

 

So I went to my first zumba class today (a zillion years later!) and now I remember why I never suceed at these things. I do one thing and it WRECKS me. However, now that I've "activated" my 10 classes, I have to use them all up by the 13th of May so now I'm trying to figure out what my best plan of attack will be in order to not burn out by trying to do too many in one week, but not wasting my classes either...

[ThisRoughBeast]

There are muscles in my butt I didn't know I had. They are informing me now that they're very sore.

[ThisRoughBeast]

I did an aerial fitness class today. Yesterday I did the aerial stretching class, and I loved it so much and was so excited to try something a bit harder. I'm pretty bendy so streching things are easy but the fitness class was perfect. The only downside is that the classes are really far away from where I live and I don't own a car so an hour class takes me almost three hours to get there, do the class and get home. Which is a big chunk of time. But I sent a picture of myself hanging upside down (oh my god I LOVE it and my back feels so good!) to a friend and she thought it looked cool so she might do classes with me, and she does have a car....so...whatever, we'll see.

 

[ThisRoughBeast]

It's been a bit stressful at chez beast. And by a bit, I mean I got shitfaced on the weekend and cried inconsolably all over public transportation. I did a lot of dancing though before that.

 

Today I carried around a six month old baby for over an hour while looking after three other toddlers. And then I went to a zumba/circuit training session. So I feel pretty dead. Good, but dead.  I also picked up a few pieces of equiptment so I can get working on strength - a hanging pull up bar that can be taken down for tricep dip/pushup training. Which I don't think I could manage if you paid me right now!

[ThisRoughBeast]

I need to start keeping a food log since I'm clearly missing something because I can't seem to budge an inch from where I am. So.

 

Smoothie: 1 frozen banana, greek yogurt, orange juice, a handful of blackberries and raspberries (~405)

Coffee (0)

A cup of milk (~105)

10 pistachios (~40)

Chili (<500)

bagel (~250)

 

Total: <1300

[ThisRoughBeast]

Coffee with splash of milk that I only drank half of

Disappointing pita of about 250 calories that I only ate half of (~150)

Curry and rice that I ate all of (~450)

delicious homemade brownie that my mother literally put into my hand (~150)

 

Total: 750

 

I have literally no idea what I'm doing. This is quickly becoming clear.

[ThisRoughBeast]

Today I had to go clothes shopping. I only cried a little bit.

 

Mostly I can fake-out my brain by clenching my fists and teeth and breathing angrily until my brain is like, "Oh well, we must be angry then, I was wrong, never mind." (It's like that thing where you stand confident and so you feel confident but with anger and sadness) I lost my grip on it for a few seconds but I pulled myself back together pretty fast.

 

I'm really just sick of myself at this point.

 

Today I had:

Coffee with a splash of milk

smoothie (~450)

chicken pot pie (~480)

chocolate milk because I don't give a fuck today and I'm exhausted and sad. (~300)

 

~1230

[alienjenn]

welcome to the rebellion

 

I think you might find after a few days that you aren't getting enough calories... and strange as that may seem that can be a huge hindrance to weight loss... 

 

I like this site to calculate BMR and TDEE

 

(I know you said you don't know what you are doing... but I don't want to just assume you know zero and be all explainy and stuff and you already know it )

 

 

steve has written some awesome posts about leveling up your goals... I have written some detailing how I go about setting/tracking goals (which may help ya figure out your "proper goals" )

 

 

and as a final point... the assassins take ALL levels of fitness... 

 

as long as you have done your newbie challenge in the recruit area you don't have to join in the Adventurers challanges until you can join the Assassins

[ThisRoughBeast]

Yeah, I figured out the whole class/race/etc. thing a while back and am waiting for Feb-March challenge so I can do my n00b level first. We'll see what comes after that.

 

In terms of calories, the whole thing is so daunting. Either I eat way over budget or a little under. I can't seem to hit the middle ground. My BMR is about 1500 and TDEE is 2000 if the calculators are right. I poked about the IIFYM website and they suggest 1618-1720kcal a day.

 

Fuuuuuu- All these numbers. I guess I can relax a little bit on how much I'm eating rn but honestly, I've been stuck at 170 for a month and nothing is working. I'm skeptical that I'm eating too few calories. Isn't the whole point to eat less than you expend?

 

I had a good read of the article about building muscle and losing fat and the fact that it's pretty much impossible to do both at the same time. Right now I just want to lose some weight (I'm 170 and I'd like to get down to 130) and lower my body fat %. When I get to that point (if I ever manage to break 170 wtf is this nonsense) then I'm going to work on strength training and try to gain muscle. The pilates I'm doing is really because my back is a hot mess and I have zero strength. Even kneeling pushups are hard for me rn.

 

Thank you for your advice btw.

[ThisRoughBeast]

So I'm back from a holiday which was on the one hand awesome because I got to see and do cool stuff and an on the other hand, an emotional nightmare because my family is kind of awful sometimes. The "pep talks" (that's literally what he calls them) that consist of "you're fat and ugly, and no one likes you, especially me" I get from my father don't really help tbh.

 

Anyway, like everyone else, my weight fluctuates so when I weigh myself I just round up. So right now I'm somewhere between 165-170, which to me means 170 since I'm used to not getting excited. It can (and probably will) go back up, so in my mind I'm still stuck at 170.

 

It's so cold here and I lost my internet access to book pilates appointments. I have to go in and talk about fixing it, or call them to fix it, and my depression is pretty bad right now so that seems kind of insurmountable. I haven't been for about a month. I miss it, but I can't get back to it. And I have 8 left and after that I can't afford it. I guess maybe I'm also kind of hoarding them, which is stupid.

 

I wanted to do this NF challenge time period, but signing up seemed like a real waste of time since I already know I'm not going to make my goals. Jesus I sound defeatist but it's realism. I am really struggling and I'm struggling with my food intake. Yesterday was coffee for breakfast, an apple (55) and chocolate milk (250-300) for lunch, and I eat dinner with my mom 3 out of 4 days of the week, and last night was steak and mushroom pie (400). So that's...like 800 calories? Which is probably half of what I should be but I'm tired and depressed and I can't stand being where I am any more.

 

Uuuuuuuugh. I'm so tired of myself.

[ThisRoughBeast]

Severe stomach pains yesterday for no discernible reason. Back to 170 today.

[alienjenn]

Maybe if you know you can't make your goals you should rethink them

And yeah calories are daunting. ... I can't handle their counting

Do you see someone for your depression?

[ThisRoughBeast]

I tried; I went to two sessions, but the therapist didn't bother to come to the second one, or let me know she wasn't coming which, when I think about it, kind of a dick move. It doesn't take a genius to tell when someone is bored while they're listening to you though, so I'm really not surprised she couldn't be arsed the second time. I wouldn't want to listen to me either. Anyway, I could afford it then, but I can't afford counseling right now so...idk. I've been in therapy before, I've got the CBT tools to keep myself going. Whining about my problems isn't going to fix them (she says, whining about them on the internet).

 

My main goal was to lose weight. The specific way was to eat better. More fruit and veg, less bread, no boredom or depression snacking, drinking less calories. So I did. For a month and a half I really worked on my diet. I even got out and exercised. Exactly no weight was lost. I can't use up that many spoons for something that doesn't get me results.

 

I'm really not sure what I'm going to do. I was hoping making diet and exercise changes would boost my mood but it's done the opposite.

[alienjenn]

Did you track other metrics than weight? I've had 6wc where I lost NO weight but several inches