Annoying comments you hear all the time

[Mahina]

That would make you an ambivert. A little known yet widespread type of people who are somewhere between extrovert and introvert. Like many other things, extroversion and introversion are on a sliding scale.

I love being around my friends. For a while. Until I get tired and annoyed. I also don't mind being around a group of strangers if I don't have to interact, like the mall or a park. But throw me in a group of strangers and have me interact with them. Might as well tell me to hand feed a starving lion.

[Thrillho]

I am super-extroverted around certain groups of people, whom I have a comfort level with, and super-introverted with the other 7 billion people on the planet, so I know how that goes.  I can be a loud, drunken party-guy if there's the right music and the right friends.

 

I schedule time for it approximately once every eight months. (That's the introvert speaking)

[I-Jo]

An ambivert?  I like it.

 me to.

 

describes me extremely well.   

 

there are just days I don't want to be around anyone- OR I'm in a group and I'm totally content to take back seat and say nothing. 

 

Other days- sweet jesus I'm annoyingly loud and extroverted. 

[MariahSnow]

My significant other and I are both introverts, so we get into that game of "are you mad at me?" "no, are you mad at me" because we haven't really spoken to each other all day. Now I just expect him to speak up if something is really wrong. Otherwise, we bob along in our hamster balls.

[MariahSnow]

My significant other and I are both introverts, so we get into that game of "are you mad at me?" "no, are you mad at me" because we haven't really spoken to each other all day. Now I just expect him to speak up if something is really wrong. Otherwise, we bob along in our hamster balls.

Note: I am also expected to speak up if something is wrong which is hard for an introvert, but typically ends painlessly. Much less pain than festering about it all day.

[Damaramu]

I'm glad I read this conversation. I'm extremely outgoing and such, so I never really got introverts. However, I never had any kind of hatred for them or disliked them because they didn't talk.

I'm more like the guy reaching into the bubble "Hey talk to me! Be my friend! Yeah you!"

When people would give the quiet guy in class shit, I'd try to befriend him. Funny though they usually let me into the bubble and were my friend. I must've done something right.

[ReachingForTheStars]

Maybe you were just more sincere.  You were likely doing it because you noticed they were in a pinch, but If you did it completely out of pity, it probably wouldn't have worked as well.

[terrormortus]

I'm glad I read this conversation. I'm extremely outgoing and such, so I never really got introverts. However, I never had any kind of hatred for them or disliked them because they didn't talk.

I'm more like the guy reaching into the bubble "Hey talk to me! Be my friend! Yeah you!"

When people would give the quiet guy in class shit, I'd try to befriend him. Funny though they usually let me into the bubble and were my friend. I must've done something right.

 

Maybe you were just more sincere.  You were likely doing it because you noticed they were in a pinch, but If you did it completely out of pity, it probably wouldn't have worked as well.

I agree with this. Introverts tend to be pretty good at reading subtle signs, so they probably realized you were being sincere and let you into their little hamster ball.

[Killyourfeet]

Also the level of pushiness can make a difference. I know when I feel forced into a conversation, I shut down.

[Basement Cat]

Also the level of pushiness can make a difference. I know when I feel forced into a conversation, I shut down.

Especially when the conversation topic is the most awkward pick up line you've ever heard. I'm very introverted, but my work requires me to interact with people all the time (I'm a teacher).

 

One day, a fellow teacher, whom I did not know well, popped into my classroom during break and asked me what I was doing. I told him I was looking up recipes on the Internet. His answer? "Wow, that makes me want to go and have dinner at your place". O_o;  

[Zorch]

I agree with this. Introverts tend to be pretty good at reading subtle signs, so they probably realized you were being sincere and let you into their little hamster ball.

Some are.  This introvert isn't, which sometimes gets me into even more trouble than some other, better-attuned introverts.

 

 

Also the level of pushiness can make a difference. I know when I feel forced into a conversation, I shut down.

Absolutely.  Generally trying to force me into a conversation has the opposite effect.  My personal favorite was when one of the administrative folks at work decided that I was "too shy", and started proposing ideas to "fix" my "shyness".

 

The folks that I am most open/talkative with are those that don't try to force conversations with me, but have built trust with me to the point where the conversations just happen.

[Vella]

Something like this?

 

Yes.  Yes, this.  I want this because reasons.

 

Maybe you were just more sincere.  You were likely doing it because you noticed they were in a pinch, but If you did it completely out of pity, it probably wouldn't have worked as well.

 

Seconded.  Even introverts will spend time on people who seem to genuinely want to be around them and respect their boundaries and stuff.

 

Especially when the conversation topic is the most awkward pick up line you've ever heard. I'm very introverted, but my work requires me to interact with people all the time (I'm a teacher).

 

One day, a fellow teacher, whom I did not know well, popped into my classroom during break and asked me what I was doing. I told him I was looking up recipes on the Internet. His answer? "Wow, that makes me want to go and have dinner at your place". O_o;  

 

O.o  What.  How is that even .... what!?

[Basement Cat]

O.o  What.  How is that even .... what!?

 

Yeah, that was my reaction too. I gave him the thousand yard stare. I later learned that he hits on every female teacher he finds. Creeper.

[I-Jo]

THere is a guy in my phone who is listed as creeper.

he's not really- he's just super pushy/forward. 

I shut him down twice and now we just chat casually- some people have no idea how to read signals. 

[Killyourfeet]

One day, a fellow teacher, whom I did not know well, popped into my classroom during break and asked me what I was doing. I told him I was looking up recipes on the Internet. His answer? "Wow, that makes me want to go and have dinner at your place". O_o;  

 Oh my, that uh...that's not subtle at all 

 

Absolutely.  Generally trying to force me into a conversation has the opposite effect.  My personal favorite was when one of the administrative folks at work decided that I was "too shy", and started proposing ideas to "fix" my "shyness".

Fixing shyness! I've heard that one before. Talk about not understanding the situation

[Thrillho]

ACYHATT: "Wow, you're tall, huh?"

 

... no.  I hadn't noticed.  Thank you. 

 

Also, agreed on the shyness-fixing.  I am trying to push my kids to be more outgoing when they are around other people, but that's not "fixing shyness"... or so I tell myself.  They're generally not shy kids, they LOVE to talk to other people, but when it's a new person for the first time there's a resistance. 

 

Also also, I love when people try to find a way to say "So, your son/daughter is a little.... 'special', huh?" politely.

[Mahina]

ACYHATT: "Wow, you're tall, huh?"

 

... no.  I hadn't noticed.  Thank you. 

I have a super tall friend who gets the tall question and the "do you play basketball?" questions all the time. We love the basketball ones because the guy can't coordinate his limbs to save his life.

 

One of the funniest I've heard though is one time a waitress was seating us and she asked him if he needed a booster seat to reach the table. It was a new one at least.

[Thrillho]

They  never ask if I play basketball, because only tall and SKINNY people get that.  I'm tall and vaguely shaped like a cinderblock wall.  With a beard. 

[ReachingForTheStars]

Also also, I love when people try to find a way to say "So, your son/daughter is a little.... 'special', huh?" politely.

 

Funny story.  I once had a teacher in elementary school who suggested I get tested for autism.

[Rostov]

Really nice (and very short) video clip - "15 things introverts want you to know"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fsEPMB5Usck

 

There's also a good TED talk by Susan Cain on the power of introverts - I read her book over the summer, and I'd recommend it if the TED talk interests you.

http://www.ted.com/talks/susan_cain_the_power_of_introverts.html

 

I found it really useful in recognising and understanding some features of my own behaviour and attitudes that I hadn't fully understood before.  I'd already decided that I was going to leave social events when I was exhausted or at the point they stopped being fun, rather than thinking I needed to stick around.  But it was understanding that socialising was tiring for me (and for a lot of other people) and energising for others that was a bit of a revelation. 

 

What I don't want, though, is to use introversion as a fig leaf or an excuse for not pushing myself to be more outgoing, or more social, or take more risks.  Some days I really don't feel like talking to anyone, and I remember one day in particular at work when I had a nice quiet afternoon planned to get on with stuff and a potentially important meeting was sprung on me with people I didn't know.  As it turned out it went really well, and I actually enjoyed it.  So I don't want introversion to become an excuse for me to shrink.  One of the interesting things in Susan Cain's book was about how introverts can go against type for things they care about enough.  So I've tried to file my introversion under self-knowledge, rather than diagnosis or role or fate.

[Vella]

What I don't want, though, is to use introversion as a fig leaf or an excuse for not pushing myself to be more outgoing, or more social, or take more risks.  Some days I really don't feel like talking to anyone, and I remember one day in particular at work when I had a nice quiet afternoon planned to get on with stuff and a potentially important meeting was sprung on me with people I didn't know.  As it turned out it went really well, and I actually enjoyed it.  So I don't want introversion to become an excuse for me to shrink.  One of the interesting things in Susan Cain's book was about how introverts can go against type for things they care about enough.  So I've tried to file my introversion under self-knowledge, rather than diagnosis or role or fate.

 

Absolutely!  I would class myself as absolutely introverted ... but that doesn't mean I haven't learned the art of small talk, and of being at a party and making people believe I'm engaged in what they're saying and doing.  Heck, I usually actually *am* engaged.  I've a few friends who take this to mean I like parties and they try to keep me there for far longer than I really want to be there, but they don't know me very well, and they'll learn.  I very rarely get people who think when they meet me that I'm standoffish or antisocial, but my Dad still hasn't quite learned that neutral-face does not mean angry-face.

 

All being introverted should mean is that I know that I can't just spend all the time ever with people.  I know *why* I get so cranky and bleh when I try to do this.  I also know that I'm more likely to say 'no' to going out, and that I shouldn't do this all the time.

And it means that I'm comfortable with just wanting to be alone, and I don't try to make myself an extrovert or feel like I should be "trying harder" to be social.  Definitely self-knowledge rather than self-restriction.

[MariahSnow]

They  never ask if I play basketball, because only tall and SKINNY people get that.  I'm tall and vaguely shaped like a cinderblock wall.  With a beard. 

 

A black coworker once asked me if I played basketball (because I am tall) and I responded, "no, did you?" His face was great AND he totally got how he was just stereotyping me because I'm tall. Because only tall people are good at sports, obviously.

[Book]

ACYHATT: "Wow, you're tall, huh?"

 

... no.  I hadn't noticed.  Thank you. 

 

 

My 12-year-old daughter is 5'11". Yeah, she's heard this once or twice. She got the "How's the weather up there?"  joke recently. Ugh. She's very proud of her height, but this is annoying her.

[Thrillho]

Also, since I eat twice at work, generally around 10:30am and 2:30pm (heating up a thing of soup or a can of beans in the break room), people always assume I'm just CONSTANTLY EATING.... and feel the need to point it out.  In case I didn't know.  Because I'm fat.

 

 *grumble*

[Daisygirl]

This conversation pops up for me every few weeks, not sure about everyone else

 

Person A: *mumbles something indistinctly*

Person B: "What was that sorry?"

Person A: "I was just saying that--- oh never mind, don't worry..." 

 

Its annoying and makes me feel deprived of whatever the person was going to tell me! Though to be honest I have done it once or twice when I was just too tired to repeat myself :/